We Want 5000 Circulation - You Want a Better County Paper - Help Us Get Both WEATHER FORECAST: Showers. WEATHER FORECAST: Showers. READ THE CITIZEN SAFE, SANE, SURE. READ THE CITI SAFE, SANE, SUlIgl 68th YEAR -NO. 42 HONESDALE, WAYNE CO., PA., FRIDAY, MAY 26, 1911. ENTS r it PBIOE 2EI MYSTER OUS KICKER WINS Af IE THE TEN COMMANDMENTS REVISED Ohio Man Rewrites Them According to Supreme Court's Standard Oil Decision WORD "UNREASONABLE" PLAYS IMPOHTAXT PA I IT IX WOItK OF REVISION. "MUSTN'T KILL MOHE THAX REASONAI1LE NUM BER OF COMPETITORS. Columbus, O., May 22. To the Editor New York American: Sir The Ten Commandments might be construed as follows under authority of the decision of the United States Supreme Court In the case of the Standard Oil company vs. the United States: First Commandment Thou shalt have no unreasonable number of other gods before Me. Second Commandment Thou shalt not make any gtaven image or any unreasonable likeness of any thing that Is In heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is In the waters under the earth; thou shalt not unreason ably bow down thyself to them, nor serve them any more than is. for. thy convenience, for the Lord thy God Is occasionally a jealous God, visiting the unreasonable in iquity of the fathers upon the children unto a reasonable number of generations of them that un reasonably hate him. Third Commandment Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord in vain unreasonably. Fourth Commandment Six days shalt tnou labor, so long as such requirement Is reasonable. But the seventh day Is the Sabbath; In It thou shalt not do any more work than thou dost on a week day, but thy man servant, thy maid servant, thy cattle and the stranger within thy gates shall do such a reasonable amount as yields unto thee the highest de gree of comfort. Fifth Commandment Reasonably Ups and Downs of News boy's Life. JOE WESTBROOK TELLS 'SQUIRE SMITH PLAYIX' HOOKEY ISX'T ALL ITS CIJACKEI) UP TO HE. Master Joseph Westbrook, the fourteen-year-old son of Joseph Westbrook, of Spring street, Hones dale, last Monday afternoon at a hearing before 'Squire Robert A. Smith, told an interesting story of the ups and downs in the life of a Maple City "newsle." Master Westbrook, who will be fifteen on August 18, and who has peddled one of the nearby city even ing dallies for four years, is a pupil in the seventh grade of tho Hones dale public schools, Mrs. W. A. Slu man being his teacher. According, however, to the com plaint made by Principal of Schools, Harry A. Oday, Joseph, Jr., "truant ly left the Honesdale High school, and continued to keep absent from the said school on several occasions, contrary to the Act of July 11, 1901, of the Commonwealth of Pennsyl vania." In other words he got into trouble, "for not coming to school," as he sobblngly told a Citizen man who was present at the hearing. "Tho Long And Short Of It." Principal Harry A. Oday brought the little fellow to the 'Squire's of fice about half-past four o'clock Mon day afternoon. As they walked through Central Park, and on up the path to the court house, they present ed a striking contrast. Prof. Oday is almost seven feet tall, and well, Master Joseph is rather a small boy for his age. It was "the long and short of it!" When questioned by the 'Squire as to his age, Joseph admitted that he was fourteen, and that he would be fifteen in August. Prof. Oday said, "I looked up his record. Ho has been to school this year 48 days; that is all he has been there out of 153 days." Joseph tried to condone his ab sence by saying: "I only started in about three months ago to come back." He also said that he was looking for a job. The 'Squire wanted to know how many times he had gone to work, to which he promptly replied that ho had gone to work three times. Two of the places at which he was em ployed were the Honesdale Footwear Company and Durland and Weston Shoe company, "Hasn't your father had any trouble with you?" asked tho 'Squire. "Extra Paper! AH About Tho Fire" "No, sir," Insisted Joseph, "only once In a while. Some times I don't do what he wants me to do. Some times I don't get home until after C o'clock on account of my papers. Then he says I'm running around and gives me a scolding for It." Joseph further related that he had his "Journals" to deliver from one to three o'clock, afternoons. The Wed nesday of tho week previous, he went fishing, he confessed. Unlucky Tliirtccn. "Thirteen" Is an unlucky number for Joseph. Prof. Oday in comment ing upon his repeated absences from Bchool, stated that in the seventh month he attended thirteen days, in the sixth tho same number, and thir teen and one-half in the fifth. "If ho can so thirteen," remarked Mr. Oday, "why can't he go twenty days?" honor thy father and thy moth er, but do so in great obscurity, that they may not interfere with thy daughter's social standing or spoil your son's matrimonial al liance, that thy prey may be long upon the land which the Lord, through reasonable monopoly, glv eth thee. Sixth Commandment Thou shalt not. kill more than a reasonable number of thy competitors, not more than will give you a com plete monopoly of the business. Seventh Commandment Thou shalt not commit ndultery to an unrea sonable degree. Eighth commandment Thou shalt not steal an unreasonable amount and thou shalt not be prosecuted therefor after you are found guil ty, if it shall in any way disturb big business. Ninth Commandment Thou shalt not unreasonably bear false wit ness against thy neighbor unless any witness against thyself, what soever, if it tend to incriminate thee. Tenth Commandment Thou shalt not unreasonably covet thy neigh bor's house, nor thy neighbor's wife, nor his man servant, nor his maid servant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor anything that Is thy neighbor's. If you can organize a pipe line of a New Jersey cor poration that will choke thy neighbor from marketing his goods or buying the finished pro ducts, this will not be covetous. F. S. MONNETT. Prof. Oday said that "ho gave the boy a certificate and wanted him to go to work. He had three jobs in three weeks. The law says he shall be at work or at school." Joseph tried to explain that he had worked in the box factory for a month steady, and that he worked in the shoe shop two weeks. He sprained his wrist, so he said, and didn't report one morning, and ho was told they didn't want him, when he came again. Prof. Oday testified that he told the boy the last time he went after him that the next time he stayed out he would have him arrested. The 'Squire lectured the boy for neglecting his school duties and sug gested that it might, be necessary to send him to tho House of Correction. "There's no danger of my running away," chirped Joseph. "I'd get caught anyway. I read In the papers how young Hartman got caught, and got worse than I did if I stayed home," After listening patiently to the boy's story, the 'Squire said: "Take him over to tho Sheriff, and tell him to care for him until to-morrow!" This was done, but later in the evening his father came over and secured his release. Doesn't Believe In Heresy Trials DR. W. H. SWIFT EXPHESSES OPIXIOX OX ATLANTIC CITY ASSEMBLY CASE. "I don't believe in heresy trials," said the Rev. W. H. Swift, D. D., pastor of the First Presbyterian church, Honesdale, when seen Wed nesday morning by a Citizen man, and asked to express an opinion on the heresy trial now in progress at the meeting of the General Assem bly in session at Atlantic City, aris ing out of charges of disbelief in certain Biblical passages, made against Rev. William D. Grant of tho Northumberland Presbytery. "A man who is not in sympathy," continued Doctor Swift, "with the teachings of the church, should withdraw from it. Dut 1 do bolievo In a large liberty. I don't believe in heresy trials." Doctor Swift is an alumnus of Union Theological Seminary, New York City, which has been under fire for years, on account of the Hberalness of its teachings. "I was at Union Seminary," re marked Doctor Swift, "before the days of Brlggs. There wore grand good men there then as now. It was on Eighth street then. We had to do our own carrying of coal from the sub-cellar up to the eighth floor. Now everything Is up-to-date." "I don't believe in heresy trials," was Doctor Swift's last word to the reporter. ooooooooooooooooooo o o THE WEDNESDAY ISSUE o o OF THE CITIZEN FOR MAY o o 31 WILL BE PRINTED ON o o MONDAY, OWING TO MEMOR- o o IAL DAY OCCURRING ON o o TUESDAY. ADVERTISERS, o o CORRESPONDENTS, AND ALL o o THOSE TO -WHOM IT MAY o o CONCERN ARE REQUESTED o o TO BEAR THIS CHANGE IN o o MIND AND SEND IN THEIR o o COPY EARLIER. o o o ooooooooooooooooooo BAD MRJ UCKLEY CELEBRATE 3 DAIS "Threatened to Kill Me I Memorial Services Begin 1,000 Times" Says Wife j Sunday, End Tuesday MUST GIVE BOND TO KEEP THE j HONESDALE LEADS IX CONTIUU PKACE AXD LEAVE HIS WIFE I I'TIONS TO SUSTAIN GRAND ALONE. j ARMY POST. The matrimonial difficulties of Mr. and Mrs. John Buckley of 129 River street, Honesdale, (Texas township) were pretty thoroughly aired, at a hearing hold Wednesday auernoon at u o clock in 'Squire YV H. Ham's office. John Buckley, it will be remem bered, was arrested Monday by deputy constable Patrick J. Moran at the instance of his wife, who swore out a warrant chareine him with being drunk and disorderly ana witu making threats, and lodged In Jail, pending a hearing Wednes day afternoon at 2:30 o'clock. Deputy Sheriff F. H. Crago brought tne prisoner to the Squire s office about 3 o'clock Wednesday after noon where a hearing was held. Tho 'Squire informed the defendant of the complaints which his wife had made against him, and asked Buck ley what he had to say about It. Buckley had nothing much to say about it at Urst, denying in fact that he made any threats, unless he made them when he was drunk. He didn't know, ho said, whether his wife's tongue was worse than his or not. Mr. Ham reminded him that this was a good chance to unbosom him self of any grievances he might have against his better half. When pressed further, Buckley protested that he didn't do anything wrong, except when he got drunk. He didn't think he could furnish bail. Mr. Ham thought it wouldn't per haps be any great hardship if he took a couple of weeks' rest In jail, as it might help him to make some good resolutions. Mrs. Buckley declared that all she wanted was peace. He promised to be good before, but he didn't keep his pledges. In fact he broke them each time, she averred. "I want him," continued Mrs. Buckley, "to stay away from me for the remainder of my life and I want to keep the little girl in my posses sion." "Will I be taken care of In the poor house if I can't work?" whim pered .Mr. Buckley. 'Squire Ham assured him that ho would be looked after in such an event. Mutual recriminations wore ex changed between the unhappy pair as they sat in the 'Squire's olllce. Mr. Buckley admitted that his fail ing was drink. She told some of the unprintable names he called her when under the Influence of Intoxi cants, and asserted that he threat ened to kill her 100 or a 1000 times. Sooner or later, she felt, in some drunken fit, he would do It, too. The 'Squire suggested that Mr. and Mrs. Buckley might retire into the parlor, with a view of reaching some sort of an understanding in the matter. His offer was not ac cepted. When 'Squire Ham intimated that Mr. Buckley would have to give bonds to keep the peace, the prison er was up in arms in an instant, and expressed his fear that he would lose his property rights as all the labor of his life-time, so he alleged, was in the property. He admitted, however, upon cross examination by his wife, that the property belonged to her, and had been willed to her, but persisted in saying that he had done all that he was able to do on It. Another excuse which Mr. Buck ley offered for not putting more money into the place, was the fact that his wife always had the hand ling of his money until he broke down. "All I want Is peace and quiet ness," continued Mrs. Buckley, who said she had tried to make a good man of him. There were further interesting revelations of family history, the upshot of it all being that Mr. Buck ley was given until Friday after noon, at tho same time, by 'Squire Ham, to secure a bondsman who would guarantee that he would agree to keep the peace and leave his wife alone, Mr. Buckley has been in similar trouble before. Once he took the pledge from Father Hanley, but his strong desire for drink led him to break It. All are agreed, that he Is a good man when ho Is sober. ADAM FELK'S LEG CRUSHED. Adam Felk, a driver in the em ploy of David Fisher, the South Main street iron dealer, Tuesday af ternoon while unloading metal from a car In the D. & II. yard, met with a serious accident, a heavy bar of iron four Inches in diameter and about six feet long falling on his lower right leg, crushing it badly and fracturing the ankle. Tho ac cident was caused by the horse mak ing a sudden Jerk forward when the bar of iron was hanging midway between the car and tho wagon. Mr. Felk was removed to his home on Erie street, medical aid was sunr moned and he was made as com fortable as possible, The unfor tunate man has a wife and four small children. It may have to be amputated. The local observance of Memorial Day this year will extend over a period of three days commencing with a memorial sermon at St. Mary Magdalena's Sunday at 7:30 p. m before the Captain James Ham Post No. 198; and the Ladles' Circle G. A. R., Company E, Thirteenth In fantry, N. G. P., and Alaple City Drum Corps; continuing with exor cises Monday afternoon at the school when patriotic addresses will be made to tho school children by the veterans of tho Civil war; concluding Tuesday with the official Memorial service commencing at 10 o'clock, when tho line of march will form at Eighth and Main streets and proceed to Fourth, thence by Fourth to Church, to the corner of Ninth, thence East to Court street, up Court street to Tenth, up Tenth to the Lackawaxen and thence to the cemetery. The program follows: Drum Corps: "Tho Reveille." "Tho Long Roll." Post Bugler: "The Assembly." Invocation: Rev. C. C. Miller. Opening by Post Commander. Raising Flag: Mrs. William Clark. Band: "The Star Spangled Banner." Draping Grave: Mrs. Charles E. Ba ker. Drum Corps: "Glory Hallelujah." Dropping flag at half-mast: Mrs. Wm. Clark. G. A. R. Services: Officers of Post; with addresses by veterans who went to the front at the outbreak of the war, fifty years ago. Band: "La Marseillaise." Service in memory of the unknown dead. Address: Rev. Dr. W. H. Swift. Decorating Grave: .Mrs. D. B. Mantle. Band: Dirge. Musketry salute to the dead: Com pany E. Benediction: Rev. Dr. W. H. Swift. Dr.um Corps: "Tattoo." Post Bugler: "Taps." Forming for return march. Band: "The Watch on the Rhine." Raising flag: Mrs. Wm. Clark. Instead of opening the day with Salutes at 5 a. m., In accordance with tho. time-honored custom, in view of the objections of many people who do not enjoy being aroused from their slumbers at such an unseemly hour, the salutes this year will first be fired at 10 a. m. The Post Commander, in speaking of tho day's observances, says that they will necessarily come to an end before long, but as the veterans are dying off very rapidly that he hopes to be able to keep the Post together in sufficient numbers to hold the ser vices for four years more, 1915, as that will be tho fiftieth anniversary of the surrender of the Confederate army and the restoration of the Union. He adds that the people hero have a keen appreciation of the day, and Its meaning, and would bo sorry (Continued on Page Eight) JIT. PLEASANT DANKER BEGINS TERM. E. H. Steinman, Mount Pleasant, Pa., formerly vice-president of the Farmers and Drovers' Bank of that city, has arrived at the Federal prison at Leavenworth, Kansas, to serve a five-year sentence. Stein man was convicted on a charge of making excessive loans on Insuffi cient security. Delegates Appointed to Baptist Con vention. The executive committee of the Wayne Baptist Association met Tues day afternoon In Honesdale and ap pointed as deleeatns tn tho nntlnnnl and) state conventions of the denom ination which will be held In Phila delphia: Rev. James Ralnoy, Alden vllle, and Rev. H. J. Baker, South Clinton. Thov also nartlallv ed the program for the annual meet ing oi me wayne Baptist Association which convenes at South Clinton in August. August. The executive committeo consists or Rev. Charles F. Smalley, Hawley; Rev. James Ralney, Alden vllle; Rev. G. S. Wendell, Hones dale, and Messrs. John Penwarden and George P. Ross, Honesdale. Armory Committee. At a meeting of the Honesdale Armory Board, Wednesday evening, Messrs. Homer Greene and John D. Weston were appointed a commit tee to wait on Major General C. B. Dougherty, Wllkes-Barre, with ref erence to the time of the dedication of the new $35,000 Park Place Armory. TO PAINT PARK FENCE. TllO COlintv onmmlaalnnopn at their recent meeting, ordered that me xence surrounding the monument In Central Park, eercted by tho Wayne Memorial Association in 18C9, be painted. PETERSEN TREES STRUCK. During the course of the severe thunder shower, Wednesday after noon, lightning struck and hadly splintered a maple and an elm tree In front of the residence of Miss Caroline Petersen, Church street. Brand New Dollar Bill Sent to P. 0. Box No. 547. Who Is It? KICK EDITOR AWARDS ti PRIZES THIS WEEK MAY GIVE SEVEN OR TEN NEXT. IT ALL DEPENDS. JUST KICK. When wo referred last issue in this column to the fact that Luther Bur bank was lashed to the mast by the lucky winners of our Kick Contest, wo didn't mean to hurt his feelings. Of course Mr. Burbank has a lot of class attached to him when it comes to making two plants grow where only one grew before, but even he has not yet succeeded in planting a kick and rais ing a dollar. You can accomplish this amazing result if you only try hard enough. Others have done It, so can you. It begins to appear as if geniuses are as scarce in Wayne county as chil dren are among the "400." Don't hide your incandescent under a bushel. Let it flicker! The Citizen takes pleasure In awarding the prizes this week as follows: (1) "Hope," Box 547, Honesdale, see below; (2) Mrs. Fannlo Simons, Paupac, last issue. Beginning with this issue the editor of the Kontest re serves the right to decrease or Increase tho number of prizes each week according to his best Judgment. Some of the kicks are as follows: Striko Tub. I kick because the ball players Down my lano on Sunday go, And after the game they come back again , And make an awful show. MRS. AUGUSTA BENNETT, Gumbles, Pa. Answer: Why don't you talk to 'em like an umpire? That will get their Angoras. Hero's "Hoping" They Will. Editor The Citizen: I kick 'cause good folks In our town, Who know the ills that fetter Our little burg, don't quit their kicks, And try to make things better. "HOPE." Box 547, Honesdale. Answer: Wonder if "Faith" and "Charity" have boxes 54S and 549? Nothing Like It. Dear Editor: I kick because tho mosquitoes are so thick and big and if I get that dollar I will come back to dear old Honesdale again, you can bet. Yours truly, MISS CARRIE McKAM, Ledgedale, Pa. Answer: We never bet on a dead sure thing, A Joyful Chirp. Dear Editor: Thanks very much for the brand new one dollar bill received on the Kicking Contest. tt-. . ''- .- '''.oi,. Yours , truly.'tifcj. BOBOLINK. Envious Insects. Dear Editor: I kick because tho moskeeters bite me when I read The Citizen. Yours truly, HENRY VETTERLEIN. Answer; They'd bite you twice as hard if you didn't. You Know What "If" Did. Dear Editor: I kick because the Wayne county fair Is held so far away; If It were only held In Hawley, We'd attend It every day. LOUISE VETTERLEIN. Pupae, Pa. Answer: Come on up, anyway, the walk will do you good. Driven from House, Now Seeks Job. GEORGE STEGNEIt CALLS ON 'SQUIRE HAM TO OBTAIN EM PLOYMENT CERTIFICATE. "I don't know why my father chases me out. He doesn't like me. He never did like me," said Master George Stegner to a Citizen man in Justice of the Peace W. H. Ham's office, Wednesday afternoon, where the boy had gone to obtain an em ployment affidavit. Master Stegner seemed like quito a young lad to be looking for a job. His parents live on Brook' Road, right over the hill by John Conear's place In Berlin township, two miles out of Honesdale, where his father tills a fifty-acre farm. Georgo Stegner, Jr., for his fath er's name Is George too, Is only fourteen years of age, and will be fifteen the thirtieth of next July. School was out the nineteenth of April, and since then his lines have been cast in hard places. According to his story, he was driven out from his home tho first of last week, and has been staying down at Jacob Hafner's since. Ho was lpoklng for a job, and In order to get it, ho needed an em ployment certificate,, which 'Squire Ham gave him, saying, "Sometime when you feel pretty rich, you can give me a quarter." Mrs. Ham gave him a good piece of parting advice, which in view of the temptations a homeless boy must face, was worth more than all the employment affi davits In the country. It was this: "Now be a good boy!" "I am going to -work now for John Decker on the ice," ho told the Citi zen man, whilst standing cap on head, left hand in his coat pocket, In the doorway, waiting for tho coveted parchment to be filled out. He stood there all through the in terview, and a more forlorn look ing object it would be hard to find. His shoes were worn out. A dark working shirt, unbottoned at the top, a ragged coat and pair of trousers constituted his wardrobe. "I never played hookey," he said when plied with further questions, "Uni Don't You Dare to Stop." Dear Editor: 1 kick to stop kicking. Kause why? No use. MRS. FRANK LITTELL, Sherman, Pa. Answer: No use, eh? Ask some of the lucky winners about it. They'll tell you It's better to kick than In herit a fortune. Editors Stand Most Anything. I kicked tho editor when there was no kicking kontest, And when I kicked I found the edi tor could stand the test, And now I kick for the dollar to win, So when my subscription runs out I can again begin. M. J. B., Scranton, Pa. Answer: Don't let a little thing like that detain you. Tut, Tut, Jennie. Dear Editor: I kick bekause It rains, I kick bekause it shines, But the things I kick about tho most Are those old hateful mines. JENNIE GOULD, Wlnwood, Pa. Answer: But, then, you're so far away, that even if Scranton did cave In. we don't suppose that Wlnwood, also. . - - I" A' - -ti , . .fTho' Hewn AlTbf'' Genius'."' , Dear Kick 'Editor:"' '',""'-j,fcfv-v i imiuureu me guub lor neip la earn the kick dollar, when lo and behold Genius sent the Goddess of Poverty to say. Genius .is never re warded until after death. There fore I kick. Now I think I'm a gen ius because I know eleven from eight. MRS. A. N. CREAMER, Waymart, Pa. Answer: That's more than some of 'em know. Family Competition. Dear Editor: I kick because my father can kick harder then I can and If I win that dollar I'll practice a little better. WILLIAM GILLETT, Ledgedale, Pa. Answer: Practice makes perfect but father makes blisters. "nor did anything wrong. Mr. Decker Is going to give me $1 a day and board. "I was out with him all last sum mer." According to the boy's story, his father gets drunk pretty nearly every other day; gets so drunk ho can't work. "George Is a good boy," said 'Squire Ham. "He's all right. "Have you got a middle name?" asked tho 'Squire. Tho boy said he hadn't. When the reporter asked him whether he hadn't any uncles or aunts or grandparents to take an Interest in him, he regretfully an swered in the negative. After the 'Squire had filled out the blanks, George put his name at the bottom of it, and departed happy. His father, it is alleged, not only drove him away from home, but also tried to prevent him from working after he had left home. His mother, according to his own story, didn't treat him any better. How To Live 100 Years RULES ARE FOR WOMEN ONLY. LEAVE NOTHING TO LIVE FOR. Here are the rules by which Mrs. Mary M. Scrlggens, of Brockton, seventh birthday last week says she expects to live to be one hundred. Lots of regular hard work fif teen hours a day is not too much. Abstain from Idle gossiping about your neighbors. Never flirt, for it is a useless waste of energy. Most emphatically do not read novels, for it destroys the disposi tion. Women get wrinkles worry ing over the troubles of the heroes. If you have vanity of dress de stroy it. Tho young women of to day who are binding up their limbs with hobble skirts, are shortening their lives. Keep away from dances and mov ing pictures. The yeomen or Wayne county in future will receive for their ser vices as Jurors $2.50 per diem, and as witnesses 11.50 a day.
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