TI1K CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, AIMUL 0, 1010. MAD CHILD FROM DEATH Caused an Automobile to Upset as it Neared Baby in the Roadway THE OROUGH REDEEMS ITSELF Fowl, a Terror for Ten Years, Inadver tently Does One Good Act and Dies Tale of a Cantankerous Bird with An Evil Eye. ' Montvllle, N. J. A bad tempered old gnnder, known to everybody In Uie village as "The Grouch," redeemed a bad reputation of ten years standing, find at the same time lost Its life, in saving Agnes Stilton, 3 years old, from death under the wheels of nn automo bile. When the child was ready to go out and have her usual romp In the little frequented road the hired man chaacd the gander Into the smoke house and closed the door by means of an old fashioned wooden button. It was nec essary to take this precaution Inas much as there was nothing "The Grouch" liked so much as to pursue the little girl with flapping wings and shilll squaws. In this way every time it had a chance It would frlchten her Into the house, leaving It in undis turbed possession of the road. Whether the smoke house door was not buttoned tight or the gander squeezed through a crack, or flew out a window, is not known, but at any rate Agnes hnd not been playing long when "The Grouch" sailed into tha road, raising the dust, hissing and flapping Its wings, and making for her with all its might "Mammal" cried the child in tenor, shielding its face with its outspread hands. list then a touring car, driven by Harold Grant of East Orange, rounded the sharp turn In the road. The barn stands at the turn, cutting off tho view in both directions. The road rarly is used by automobiles, and this Is the reason why the Stilton child was permitted to play there. Grant was going fast on a level stretch, and as he swept around tha turn the old white gander stood up so laige in his startled vision lie did not see the fleeing girl beyond. The gan der's neck was stretched to Its full ox tent and t'je wings were spread wide apart. That was no time to stop, and when, an Instant after seeing the goose. Grant spied the little girl ahead, he let out a yell of alarm that brought all the folk out of the Stilton farm house on Ihe rush. The East Orange man involuntarily closed his eyes to avoid witnessing the tragedy he feit, as he said afterward, was sure to hap pen. Hut it didn't. The automobile struck the gander full tilt, but the im pact swerved the front wheels out of their course, and by tho time "The Grouch" hud come down, lifeless, from its skyrocket flight, the auto had dart ed diagonally across the road and was lying upside down In the ditch. Grant had Instinctively let go the steering w9el at the psychological momentj and he shot ovBBthe top of a post-andJ rail fence and stuck, feet up, In a pile of fertilizing material. He lost no time In withdrawing his head from the mess, and then fell on his kneos and prayed Just why, he says, he doesn't know. As for Agnes, all had happened so quickly she hadn't had time to bo scared at anything but the mean old gander. She whimpered a bit when she saw how thoroughly and com pletely dead the gander was. Then she stood and watched her father and other persons right the automobile and set It on Its way. "The Grouch" Is to be stuffed and mounted. "The bird ain't deserving of It," said Stilton, "but. it saved my girl's life, though It didn't mean to, and I'll do a good turn." "Tho Grouch," which in its young er days was called "Peter," was for more than a decade a terror, not only to the other fowl In Farmer Abner St'lton's barnyard, but nlso to Mrs. Stilton and all the children In the neighborhood. It was a cantankerous bird with an evil eye, and when It got after either dog or child there was sure to bo some tall running to got out of the way. Stilton's Muscovy duck, "Sarah Jaue," was the only living thing with wings that ven put up a fight. When "The Grouch" and "Sarah Jane" got polng everybody flocked to 'hear the nolbc and see the feathers fly. Sev eral years ago the gander chased a tomcat up a hemlock tree by the well, and kept It there until the cat was at tacked and killed by a large hawk. " Bayonet for Cavalry. Berlin. According to a statement Just published It is probable that tho German cavalry sabre will shortly disappear and be replaced by n new short side arm which can Do used as a bayonet ith the no pattern caval ry rarblne. The military, authorities consider that for cavalry armed with the lance for fighting at close quar ters on horseback, and with the car bine and bayqnet for flgbUng on foot, the sabre would become superfluous. The value of the carblna combined with tha new side-arm for cavalry work has already been proved In fight ing in German Southwest Africa. .' alfl REVERSED IN HAYTI -reare Brought Up to Date Hat t c Moor White and Desdcmona a Pretty Black Girl. i:rriin.--An amusing performance, ot ' Othello" In l'ort nu Prince, Haytl, is ririorted by a correspondent of the Hamburger Nachrlchtcn. With the exception of Othello him self, who "was Impersonated by a Eu ropean," all the actors and actresses were natives, Desdcmona being played by s handsome young negro girl. The stngo manager had deemed. It useful to transfer the sccno of the play from Venice to n prosperous city In tho United States, while tho Jealous lover was Introduced not as a noblo Muor but as a thriving American merchant With tho exception of these slight alterations the play Itself remained the same as in tho original, and this unfortunately led to some disorder. In th" last scene, when tho audlcnco be held the swarthy Desdcmona being smothered by her white-faced hus band, they protested Indignantly, and hurled missiles at the stage. The situation was saved by a lumi nous thought on tho part of the man ager, who after requesting tho specta tors to refrain from expressing their opinions until they had seen the end reserved for Othello, ushered In three natives, who fell on tho palo rascal, knocked him down and then trampled on him, amid boisterous cheering from the house. COOODOOODDODOOOODOaOOOOODO Society Women Form a "Rolling O Club" to Reduce their Fat. Muskogee, Okla. Muskogee P. has a Roller club. Us members are all young women and they roll themselves to reduce their flesh. They belong to the best society of the town. It all started from a pretty but over-plump society woman astonishing her friends by a marked change in her form. Then she explained that she did It by rolling, which was still nore mystifying until she ex plained further. She said that he began by rolling over and over on the floor as a morning exercise, and that she found that it reduced flesh rapidly. The result was the immediate organization of the Rollers' Club, compoFCd of society ma trons and maids who are in clined to obesity. The members, in kimonos or other garments, He down and roll over and over. One hundred rolls Is a morn ing's work. One young woman x ases a kimono costume, because O she finds it does not wrap 8 around and b'.ml the limbs. CXOCCCCCOCCCCCCCCCCOCCCCCC SUICIDE FEVER IN RUSSIA."' Three Girls, One Heiress to $10,000, 000, Die Tonether. St. Petersburg, Russia. The sensa tional suicide bore of three young gir's belonging to the best circles, wl: j took their lives together, has Tre ated a great stir. It has again focused attention on the continuing epidemic of self-destruction, which is believed to be duo to neurasthenic melancholia. In this Instance, two sisters named Kc'mann,' aged twenty and sixteen years, and Miss l.auricz, heiress to ten million dollars, mot and after one had played Chopin's Funeral March all thrco drank poison and died. Thfcy left letters saying they were tired of life. No other motive Is known. There has been an astonishing num ber of similar suicides recently. In one day no less than twenty-nlno caies were reported, among them sixteen women and three children. THE BLINDING HATPIN. Eye Put Out by It in Brussels, Bel glum Damages in Case. Brussels. A court here has award ed 52,000 damages to a man who was blinded In ono eye by a woman's hat pin. Ho was standing on the platform of a street car, which stopped with a Jerk, causing the hatpin to pierce his eye. The damages were assessed equal ly against tho woman and the car company, each being condemned to pay $1,000. Hit on the Hesd, Now Stutters. Pittsburg.- Greatly hampered by stuttering in describing a poolroom row, after spending several weeks In the hospital, Joseph Ituprocht told a magistrate how ho became a confirm ed stutterer. Ruprecht had been struck on the hoad with a billiard cue and knew nothing more until ho found himself in the hospital. There physi cians tried In vain to repair his speech. He has sued Joseph Sisky, whom he charges with striking him. Teach Children to Chew Food. Cleveland, Ohio. Believing that proper mastication of food has become a lost art, members of the National Dental Society started a country-wide movement to teach tho children of the public schools how to chew. The plan Is to have each child's mouth examin ed, teeth treated If necessary, and In structions given in the proper manner of using the Jaws. Washington's Will, Faded. Washington, D. C George Wash ington's will, written by himself on more than twenty pages, has been brought here for renovation. For more than a century It has been on view In Fairfax, Va. The papor has dark ened to a rich shade of brown and the Ink faded to a sickly olive tint SOCIALISM jSJN THE WAY Prof. Carver, of Harvard, Doesn't Re gard It as a Cure-AII, but Thinks It Will Help Some. Cambridge, Mass. Prof. Thomas Mlxon Carver of thq economic depart ment at Harvard assert! that social ism Is n factor to bo reckoned with In the Industrial life of tho futuro, and although ho does not bollevo it a last tng remedy for existing conditions, he thinks It will act as n mild proventa ti3 for many encroachments on tho working people. Prof. Carver says: "Tho 'trusts', although sometimes so called, aro not a product of evolution. Thoy wera produced by tho turbulent and uncer tain conditions that prevailed prior to their organization and still prevail to-day. I challengo any one to prove that the trusts, or any one of them, has proved moro efficient In lowering tho cost of production than Individual concerns. They have, however, been able to lower the cost ot distribution through their control of the markets and by taking advantage of special conditions. "The capitalists aro doing tho very thing that Is likely to bring about their own destruction, for thoy are by their present course continually add ing to tho dissatisfied. Tho mlnuto tho dissatisfied among tho proletariat outnumber tho satisfied ones, then so cialism will come. I believe, however, that any such happening would be a disaster." SUCKERS DISTURBED FARMERS, Thousands of Flah Make Strange Noise In Trying to Ascend Dam. Montlcello, N. Y. MyrladB of suck ers which have Infested Smith Mea dow Brook, near Montlcello, Sullivan County, havo been the cause of great disturbance to the farmers living now the brook. A mysterious thumping noise, heard all through the night, hod caused many to believe that ghosts from the nearby graveyard wero prowling about the neighborhood. The origin of tho sounds was not discovered until Dewltt Olmsted.a llttla braver than his neighbors, sought to determine whence tho noises came, and after dark crept down to tho wa ter, taking a stand near an old dam which crosses the stream in the roar of his house. Below this dam, where tho water falls Into a pit, he found thousands of suckers trying to reach the pond above by swimming up tho falls. Ha also leafned to his astonishment that tho fish in their repeated endeavors to shoot the chutes seldom succeedod, while scores of the largest ones would furiously butt their heads into tha thumping noises which had so dis turbed the peace and quiet of tha neighborhood. Tho only solution of tho troubla was to destroy a portion of the dam, which was promptly done and the fish allowed to move on up stream unob structed. UNDER THE SEA TO THE POLE. Pl . If j,mn nf nrm9nv RnllHInn a Rllh. marine to Rival uapt. nemo. Berlin, Germany. The old idea of reaching the north pole by submarine, as was so graphically set forth in Jules Verno's story of "Twenty Thou sand Leagues Undor the Sea," has been revived by the announcement that Dr. Anschutz Kemp, the well known Inventor, has resolved to mako the attempt. It Is said that ho has been working for a decade upon tho project and that ho will build a submarine of his own design. It will be capable, It Is assert ed, of remaining under water at a great depth for a long period. Dr. Kemp has iilso Invented and patented In all civilized countries the different apparatus by means of which he hopes to take his soundings and bearings when deeply submerged. WHY THE PIG WHISTLED. On Being Cut Up a Piece of Spring Was Found In Its Throat. Bloomsburg, Pa. Daniel Howell has found out why bis pig whistled. Ho says that for weoks prior to butch ering time tho hog would Invariably start whistling at feeding time, and this brought all the other hogs to tha trough; they got to expecting It and the food that followed. Howell was puzzled over that whis tle until the porker, a flno one, was cut up, and there In Its throat was a section of a spring such as is found In the rollor of a window curtain. A Posthumous Letter. El Paso, Tex. "Jerry" Faust, an employee of the Southern Pacific nail road, Just recolved a letter which was addressed to him at Pittsburg. It was written and mailed at Blanchard, Penn., on July 2, 1875, by his step mother, Mrs. Mary Still. Faust loft Pittsburg many years ago. His step mother has been dead fifteen years. Skunk Safe In Massachusetts. Boston. A bill was considered which Is to Impose fines up to $500 and Imprisonment up to a year on any one who kills In the State ot Massa chusetts that well known little animal which Is described as "a member of the Mephitis roephltlca family of American mustelold carnivore, ordi narily known as the skunk." Will on Small Piece of Pasteboard. Iteadlng, Pa. Ona piece of paste board two Inches by one and one-half In dimensions, tha late P. Frank Han man disposed of an estate of $10,000, ot which $7,000 represents Ufa Insur ance. The will contains these words: "All I possess, real and personal, be longs to my wife absolutely at uy death," FOR A Theme: ON LOSING HEART. BY REV. J. H. JOWETT, M. A. I- Text: "Let us not be weary In well doing; for In due season we shall reap If we faint not." To whom Is this heartening word spoken? To a llttlo company of men and women In tha primitive fellow ship of the Apostolic Church, who are contending with stupendous obstacles, rowing against a voluminous stream. It is novor an easy thing to resist and antagonize the spirit of the age and confront the solid majority. But such was the condition of the men and women to whom this Epistle was written. Here is a little company who aro engaged in tilling a rough, tough, and unpromising bit of ground, un clean and heavy, pervaded with roots of hoary custom and tradition. But you can contend with uncleansed ground and drive your plough through the most obstructive weeds, if only the atmosphere Is cordial. If, however, to the resistance of the Impediments In tho soil there be add ed a close, sultry, enervating atmo sphere, which makes the muscles limp and bring3 a perilous lassitude and languor, the chances of progress aro reduced. That was proclsely the con dition of this church. Tho atmosphere was heavy, sultry little sections of the people wero beginning to tako portions of tho field for their own cul tivation, were beginning to pay atten tion exclusively to the salvation of their own souls, and looking every man on his patch only and not on that of others. All this was terribly hard for tho earnest, zealous workers, who had set their sanctified ambition upon tho en tire field, that thoy might turn tho whole area of tho desert Into a garden, and mako It blossom as the rose. Many times they had stopped, with limbs weary, and sent up the tired cry to the bonding Heaven: "Lord, how long, how long?" It was to men and women who were getting a littlo weary at the plough aa they looked at tho furrow still remaining to bo cut that the apostle sent this heart ening evangel: "Let us not bo weary in well doing, for in due season wo shall reap If we faint not" It is a most heartening figure for all Christian workers. Spiritual culture, "work among souls, cannot find its anal ogies in the market or exchange. It Is not a matter of safe investments and deft transactions; it is a matter which concerns the mysterious pro cesses of the field. When we are deal ing with souls we aro not mechanics dealing with that which Is seen; we are dealing with tho invisible un known. If my work were to be Judged by the standards of the business man, tho builder or mechanic, I should lay it down in sheer despair. But If I am taken to the domain of agriculture, I gain infinite hope. If 1 read my text rightly, It tells me that Christian workers are not magicians, but farm ers, who have to await tho Issuo of their labors. Anybody can see a green Held, but who can tell Just when tho seod Is be ginning to germinate? Who can seo tho invisible process by which tho seed receives its first pulso, and paste3 through the tirst process of Its. resurrection? Anybody can count converts at a large mission; nothing is easier, it is like measuring the green fields; but who can get back to the time when the first Impulse was felt? It took place In the dark. What, then, aro we to do while the harvest tarries? Wo assume wo aro In league with a great, mysterious Force, whoso name Is God. Suppose we further a33iimo that Invisible pro cesses aro going on about which we know nothing, nnd which may any moment nppear above the surface. While tho harvest tarries what aro we to do? Our text Is tho answor, "Let us not be weary In woll doing." I am going to alter that word "woll," and bring It moro Into lino with tho Apostle's meaning, "Lot us not be weary In beautiful doing." Tho suggestion Is that we havo to put beau tiful ministries Into unlovely ground. Because the bit ot land wo have to till Is primitive, rough, and rudo, we aro not to allow our methods of cul ture to be primitive, rough, and rude also. Everybody knows how exceed ingly easy It is to do beautiful things for benutlful Dooole. but to eo on do ing beautiful ministries without seeing any appreciable result, and among people who In return simply glare at you with the face of a reluctant de sert! Yet we must go on doing the beautiful. That 'counsel Is altogether sane as a mere worldly maxim. It Is always wise to proclaim the highest Ideal to the most primitive and rude. This la a princlplo which we need to obaerve and obey In our Christian work. Desirable and Safe. Aa It rests with man, through a wise and diligent employment ot his Intellectual faculties, to subdue the earth for earthly uses, and make It an altogether sate, comfortable, and do- nrable dwelling-place, ao it Is laid as a sacred obligation upoa bis spiritual and moral nature to change the king doms ot this world Into a kingdom of heaven, in which rifhteoasnese, peaco. and holy Joy prevail. Rufu Kills. ONE TUHT KOIt I'KAltliS. Berlin Hotel Porter's Mxpcrltucnt That Was Not a Success. The porter of ono of the leading Berlin hotels has Just had a curious adventure, tioino time ago a dealer In pearls who was stopping at tho hotel told him an Infallible way to distinguish real pearls from fatso, which was to put them on tho ground and stamp on thorn, tf real they would resist tho test. If false they would bo crushed. The porter, howover, never had a chance or putting this theory to tho test until a few days ago. The di rector of n well known company in Berlin, whllo dining at tho hotel, lost a valuable pearl rln. This was found by tho waiter, who gave II to the porter to return to Its owner. Tno porter saw his opportunity ha I como at last to test the quality of a pearl. He put the pin on the ground, placed tils neel on It nnd ground it to a powder. When the owner arrived to claim It then- rna a somewhat stormy scene, nut he was good naturcd euough -o rollout to say no more about the affali on the porter refunding half tho value of the pin, GOO marks In future the porter will submit any Jewelry he may find for expert opinion Women Not ns Htrong us .Men. "Women are not on the avrroge but half as strong as men. said Ur. Sargent, the director of athletics at Harvard, In a lecture recently. "Their lung capacity averages but 160 cubic inches, while that of man Is 240 cubic Inches In nearly every Instance," hp said, "where women excel In sports of the rougher or mori- masculine sort they have either inherited or acqulifd masculine characteristics AUIUTAIi AND DEi'AIlTUKE OF ERIE TKAINS. Trains leave at S:2t a. m. and 2:48 y. m. Suaaays at 2:4$ p. m. Trains -rrlve at 1:40 and 8:08 p. ra. Saturdays, arrives at 3:45 aud leaves at 7:10. Sundays at 7:92 p. m. BANK WITH A SURPLUS EARNED IN FOUR YEARS Are You One of the 3,553 Depositors Doing business at the HONESDALE DIME BANK? If not, the opportunity awaits you to open an ac count now. Start the idle money you have at your home to earn ing interest. If you have a small bank, bring or send it to us at once. Put your idle money at work. If you wish to make a loan on your farm or house or to borrow some money call at the Dime Bank. Business and Savings Accounts Solicited. Wayne County money for Wayne Counteans. D. & 11. CO. TiriE TABLE A.M.iA.M. SUN SUN 8 30 ' lC 00 ". A..M, A.M. P.M. it no 10 oo 4 30i 6 05 . . Albany Illnuhamton A.M. It Mi 2 15 12 30 8 30 2 15 .. Philadelphia.... ..W'llkes-Harre,... Scranton 1 20 2 USI 7 25 4 48 5 30 1 20 7 1W 8 15 2 08 7 I'.MJA.M. P.M. P.M. A.M. I.v 5 40 9 65 20 6 :so 2 05 2 15 2 1 8 Vj ... .Carbondale .... ..Lincoln Avenue.. ...... Whites . . ..Purview Oilman Lake Lodore ... ... . Way mart .. Kecne SWt'iio .... Prompton l'ortcnla Seelyvllle . . lloui-sduje 5 Ml U 15 H ,V a si t; ii 0 17 9 ia 0 31 8 ar 0 ls 21 8 2J II 32! II 37' II 3!l 9 43, SI 47 U 50! 9 5.V 0 ."if! it 42 6 52 li 58 2 37 2 43 t! 23 9 4S 7 01 2 49 R 2ti :t 1 51 7 07 7 13 7 lti 7 20 2 52 2 57 2 si: 3 CM 3 07 3 10 3 15 57l li 35 (i 39 ti 43 h 4; UN 10 00 10 01 10 OH 7 24 7 27 7 31 10 11 10 15 P.M.jA.M P.M. A M. I Ar The Era of New Mixed Paints ! This year opond witn a deluge of now mixed paints. A con dition brought about by our entorprising dealers to got some kind of a mixed paint that would supplant CHILTON'S MIXED PAINTS. Thoir compounds, being now and heavily advertised, may find a sale with the unwary. THE ONIjV TliACU IN HONKSDAIiE AUTilOltlZUD TO HANDLE !s JADWIN'S PHARMACY. There aro reasons for the pro-eminence of OHILTON PAINTS; let No ono can mix a bettor mixed paint. 2d Tho painters declare that it works easily and has won dorful covoring qualities. 3d Chilton stands back of it, aud will agreo to ropaint, at his owu oxnenso.ovory surface painted with Chilton Paint that proves defective. 4th Those who have used it are perfectly satisfied with it, and recommend its use to ethers. Ho DocKn't Nivl Tlmi Kind , A man can genurally get along vor) well without the respect which he lotos for Instating on having what ho l entitled to. tnmtmmmt: MARTIN CAUFIELD Designer and Man ufacturer of ARTISTIC MEMORIALS Office and Works 1036 MAIN ST. HONESDALE, PA. For New Late Novelties IN- JEWELRY SILVERWARE WATCHES Try SPENCER, The Jeweler "Guaranteed articles only sold." CROWING RECORD $37,500 j HONESDALE BRANCH Ar Lv CHILTON'S MIXED PAINTS P.M. A.M P.., A.M. 1 SL'N SUN 2 00 10 50 10 501 12 40 .8 45 8 451 3 63 7 31 732 731 "Ti A.M P.M 10 20 ( 05 7 15 2 25,PM. 9 37 3 15 6 20 1 35 ' 10 05 a.m. p.m". p. m! pTm! pm! 8 05 1 35 5 40 12 17 1 8 29 7 51 1 25 5 30 12 07 8 17 7 50 1 21 5 21 12 03 8 13 7 33 1 03 5 as 11 44 7 64 7 25 12 5fi 5 01 11 371 7 47 7 19 12 51 5 5ii 11 31 7 41 7 17 12 4!l 4 51 11 2!l 7 3M 7 12 12 43 4 .. .. 11 23 7 32 7 0!l 12 4J 4 45 11 20 7 30 7 05 12 3H 4 41 .. .. 11 K 7 26 7 01 12 32 4 37 11 12 7 22 (i 6 12 211 4 34 11 Oil 7 10 0 55 12 25 4 30 11 05 7 15 a m 'I m. p.m. 'Iam!!p.m. II i