tiie citizkn, Wednesday, august 4, 1000. WAYS WOMEN HAVE "My wife Horn." said Cnjoncs tho other day at lunch to his friend Ker amlth, "Is n hummer. She's taken tno to tho museum. I'm a regular art rrltic now. I'm thinking of getting out a certificate in that line and hanging It up over my desk." "It would look funny along with tho other things you've got hanging there," said Kersmlth. "Ilut tell mo nhout your time." "Well, it was this way," began Ca jones. "Last Sunday afternoon Hern says to nio, 'George, I want you H go out to tho art museum with mo this afternoon.' '"For heaven's sake,' says I, 'what for?' " 'What for?' she repeated Just like an echo. 'Why, to soo art and pic tures and statuary and so come under tho ennobling inllueuces of tho ideal and tho beautiful.' "'Go way,' says I in disgust. 'I'm going to read tho paper, and then I'm going downtown.' " 'George Cajoncs.' she says, straight ening herself up and looking at mo square, 'you will go out to tho art museum with me or you will stay at homo. I'm not going to have It said that my husband isn't as highly edu cated as any of tho other club's hus bands, nnd they all said they were going to have art discussed in their homes, and things like that, and I'm determined wo shall too.'" "What'd you say to that?" put in Kersmlth, with a grin. "Oh, I Just thought that utter all there might bo some fun in it," replied Cajouos, "so I Just laid the paper on the table nnd said, 'All right.' I've discovered that tho best way to man age women is to let 'em think they're having their own way." "Yes, of course," said Kersmlth, "but go on." "Well, wo got there," ho continued, "and the first thing wo wore taxed to get in. Say, that show ought to bo free to tho public. It is in New York. Hcl'n says, and other places too. It was fine, though, when you got In. The main hall Is full of statues stand ing around on blocks and looking as If they wished thoy wore some place else. Ilel'n said they were Greek. Those Greeks must have been dandles. Every one of them was lots more than six feet high, nnd they had muscles that looked as If they were all gymna sium trainers for a living. There were some queer looking women statues, some of them without heads and some with wings, nnd sonio had their arms or may bo half an arm outstretched; looked to inu like tho men were all training for races or fights or some thing, and the women were urging them to go on or else begging them to stay at home, I qouldn't tell which. "But, say, though, there's one thing you ought" to go out there nnd see. Jim. One statue, or I guess you'd cull It a group of statues, is a terror There's three men and a brace of big snakes, and I tell you they're having a time." "I believe I'll go out nnd look at that some time," said Kersmlth. "What else did you see?" "Oh, heaps of things," replied Ca joncs. "Ilel'n Insisted on dragging me through a room tilled up with gold and silver candlesticks nnd vases and things. 'Are these tho elevating and emiobling things you were telling mo about?' I says. 'For tho feeling they inspire in me is tho desire to smash tho glass and take a few away with mo.' " 'George,' says she, 'you have no high ideas about things. These beau tiful creations aro poems,' says she, looking tho way she does when she tries on a new hat before tho glass. "'That may be,' says I, 'but I wouldn't mind having this silver bath tub to sell. " 'Gracious, George,' she says, 'that's a wiuo cistern! Can't you read the label?' "Well, we went upstairs and saw a lot more things ivory chessmen and lots of vases, and things like that. There was a plaster cast of Napoleon's face, made after he was dead. I be Hove it was a fake. It didn't look a bit like him when he was alive. Then we saw an Egyptian mummy. Say, those are tho things that make you feci queer those old boys, been burled hundreds and thousands of years, and there they are, Just as If they were grinning at you. You can see their teeth, Jim. They must have been false or they wouldn't last all this time. Ilel'n says, 'Now, we'll go In and see tho pictures,' but I drew tho lino there. I'd seen enough. 'I really don't think I'd better, my dear,' says I. 'The strong lights and tho bright colors are so trying to my eye sight.' " 'Oh, you poor dear!' says she, fall ing right In. 'Of course you oughtn't do anything to lwjuro your health.' "So after we'd seen a few more beautiful creations wo went homo. "But, say, Jim, I forgot to tell you about the rug department. That was really nice." "Tho rug department?" said Ker smlth blankly. "Yes, whero they havo nil tho rugs, you know. They havo them hanging up on tho walls all around. Tho colors aro not very good some of them look pretty faded, I must say and there aro not any fringes on thom, but the patterns aro all right Ono of tho labels said that theso rugs wcro hung nil round tho walls In tho castle years ago. Funny thing to do, wasn't it? I'm glad that isn't tho fashion now, It would kill tho wall paper trade, and wo still have to eat," "George," said Kersmlth solemnly, "I'm going out there next Sunday Maybo I can got somo tips on the mar kct." Cincinnati Tribune. THE PERFUMED BATH KEFRESniNG TONICS MADE AT HOME, EASILY The Benefits to bo Derived from Camphor, Oatmeal, Milk and Soda Bntlis Particularly Commended 1 for Deprcsslngly Dot Weather. j I A delicately perfumed bath of . Eoftened water is a tonic that Im proves the texture of tho skin and Improves tho complexion. Tho ex-, pense of such a tub need not neces sarily bo large, and the refreshment I irom It Is great owing to tho relaxa-; tion of the nerves. , A Camphor bath Is the ono to be I commended for the deprcsslngly I arm days of u rum or. It Is made ' from a mixture of an ounce of tine- , turo of camphor, half as much tlno- ' turo of benzoin, and two ounces of j toilet vinegar, Such a bath as this I may bo taken In tho morning, at night, or, If preferred, In tho after- noon. Better effects will bo gained if the Immersion Is taken at such , time as to permit of lying down for ! talf an hour or so afterward. A vomnn wno Is fortunate enough tc npend her summer on a farm where milk is plentiful should not I ..so tho chanco to ndulged In milk baths, for nothing will moro quick ly soften and whiten tho skin than I this slmplo wash. A tub not being always at hand In tho country, It may j be necessary to use a basin. In i either raso tho solut'on need not bo ! more than half milk, aand tho water i should bo hot enough to warm i tho milk sufficiently to inako it a comfortable tomnoraturo. No soap Is used -n a soap cloth, rather than a orubh should bo used in applying It. A strong tonic bath is made by mixing a pound of muriate of soda with half a pout d of sulphato of so da and a quarter of a pound each of chlorides of ilme and magnesia. These Ingredients may bo put into tho tub and water poured on to dis solve them. Thon tho tub must be lllled In tho usual way. This par ticular tonic should not be used of- toner t..an once a wecV, or Its ef fect upon tho skin will bo drying. Not expensive and very delight ful I3 an oatmeal batr made by mix ing five pounds of any of tho "steam ooked variety o oarineal to a pound o: powdered orris root to a pound of almond meal, and half a pound of castlle soap scraped. A small quantity Is then sewed into a cheesecloth bag and ono of these may bo used several times by tossing It into tho bath for fifteen minutes bnforo using. Old-Time Recommendation. "All of our ancestors," said a phy sician, "were pock marked, and smallpox was a recommendation if you wero looking for work. "What J mean Is that you couldn't get a Job If you had not had small pox. No one wanted a servant who was liable at any niument to be stricken down w'th tho loathsome disease." Hence: : Ho opened a newspaper volume of 1774. "Hence, 'help wanted' ads read like this: "Wanted a man between twenty and thirty years of age, to be a foot man and under butler In a great family. He must havo had tho small pox in the natural way. Also a wom an, middle aged, to wait upon a young lady of great fortune and fashion. Tho woman must have had the smallpox In the natural way. New Orleans Times-Democrat. To Sew Hoolca on Dresses. In sewing on nooks, whether used in connection with eyes or peets, al ways spread the hooks, all sizes, be fore sowing on; it not only makes tho strain come'on different parts of the material, but it prevents them from pushing forward and showing at the edges of collars, plackots and such things. When sewing them on a boned lin ing the bone can be slipped between the front curves and tho back of the hook, after they have all been sewn on, making It very taut, thus saving tho labor of fastening the bono In the usual way. It must, of course, be fastened at elthor end after It Is inserted, otherwise it will come en tirely oft during the process of hook ing tho dress. For a Doublo Chin. Tho aindom ch.n Is ono of tfcp most determined tell-tales of ap proaching age. To rid yourself of this chin with social tendencies one should massage the throat each night. The method prescribed Is to egln at the point of tho chin and rub hard toward each ear. Tho fin' ger tips should be together at the beginning of tho motion and should tbon push -away from each other. Repeat tho motion under tho Jaws and remomber to alwayo rub upward, Either cole cream or an astringent lotion should be used. Bo sure that during the massage tho head bo held well tip. To Induce Sleep. If you cannot sleep well, try eat ing an onion sandwich early In tho evening. Slice tho onion thin, nprln' klo with salt and place between two Bllces of thin bread and butter. A man may feel that he Is stand lng up for his rights when he keeps his soat in a crowded car. Parrots aro fonder of muslo than aro tho other lower anlmala. The Scrap Book Tho Condemned. The family had hoard that bachelor Uncle Joe was going to get married. nn(1 thcro hnd bcen mucn caustic com- mcnt over tho coming event, mingled with many expressions of sympathy iur uis inie ui uiu uuuuh ul me de signing woman who had captured him, all of which were overheard by the keen nnd open eared six-year-old boy of tho family. "Pa," said the youngster ono day, "I henr Uncle Joe Is going to bo mar ried next week." "Yes," said the father. "Uncle Joo has only three days more." The little boy sighed. "Tho last three days," he said, "they give them everything to eat that they ask for. don't they, pa?" Striving. If all tho end of this continuous striving Wero simply to attain, How poor would seem tho planning and contriving, Tho endless urging and tho hurried driv ing Of body, heart and brain! But ever In tho wake of truo achieving Thcro shines this glowing trail Somo other soul will bo spurred on, con ceiving Now strength and hope. In Its own power believing. Because thou dldst not fall. Not tlilno atono the glory nor the sorrow It thou dost miss the goal. Undreamed of lives In many a far tomor r-Pnm ,w ,, r ,hir w row shall borrow. On, on, ambitious soull Ella Wheelor Wltco. A Qood Definition. In ono of tho New York schools sev eral of the children In one class failed on the definition of the word bachelor. The teacher, to Impress tho meaning of tho word on the minds of tho pu pils, told the class to look up tho word that night nnd come prepared with n good definition the next day. When the question was taken up nt the next session the first llttlo girl who was asked to define tho word an swered with a confident and smiling air, "A bachelor Is a very happy man." The teacher grow Interested. "Are you sure that Is correct?" sho asked the little one. "Oh, yes," wns tho prompt reply. "Father told mo so." Knew Who Used It. Charles U. Hoyt, Now England's great playwright, once visited a smnll town in Pennsylvania whero there is a hotel thoy say George Washington, tho Father of Ills Country, used to stop at when ho passed through. In It they havo n room he Is said to havo oc cupied nt times. Hoyt came through there onco with one of his attractions. He arrived at tho hotel nfter nil tho members of tho compauy hnd boon assigned rooms. Ono of the company was given tho Washington room, and Hoyt received a poor room on tho top lloor, tho pro prietor not knowing who he was. When ho caino downstairs later the gentleman who had got tho good room said, "Mr. Hoyt, they havo given me tho room that they used to give 'Joorgo Washington when ho came here." "Well," said Hoyt, "tho one they have given me must be the ono they gave Deuodlct Arnold when ho came." A Stickler For Rules, Billy Grimes was a sailor, and he know a sailor's duty and how to obey orders. Off a foreign port one night Billy Grimes leaned over tho side in answer to a hall. "Ahoy!" he said. "Ahoy!" was tho reply. "Lower down your ship's ladder, shipmate." "You can't como aboard here to night," said Billy. "Lower nway, you lubber," said the voice below impatiently. "Iimust come aboard. I'm tho rlvor pilot." "I don't care." said BUly, "If you're Punchus Pilot, I'll stick to tho ship's rules." Top Eager For Work. Dr. John S. Bulst, the southern sur geon, said In ono of his surgical lec tures at a state college: "It Is always in rather bad taste for a physician to boast of being busy. Physicians, undertakers and gravedlg- gcrs only cause discomfort when they alludo to good times and prosperity. There was an old man applied to tho minister of tho llttlo village of Paint Rock for tho post of grnvedlgger. His references wero good, and the minister agreed to assign him to tho church yard. uo was to be paid bo much a grave. Tho grnvedlgger haggled over the price, finally accepting It "'But will I get steady work? he demanded. "'Steady workr said tho minister. 'Land's eako, man, with steady work you'd bury all Paint Rock In a week! " The Whole Law. When ono mockingly asked Hittcl If bo would teach him tho wholo law while ho stood on ono foot the rabbi roplied: "What you would not like dono to yourself do not to thy neigh bor. This Is tho wholo law. All tho rest Is a commentary on It Go learn this." Not What He Wanted. A Scotsman walked Into a Montreal bookshop and, as tho assistant thought, asked for Robert Burns. On being told this tho proprietor of tho shop him self got down tbreo or four editions of tho poet nnd took them to the wait lug Scotsman. The customer, how' ever, shook his bead hopelessly and said, "It's nao Robert Burns I asklt for, but rubber bands l" THE SPORTING WORLD Dr. Roller Hurls Deft. B. F. Roller of Seattle, Wash., phy sician, wrestler, boxer nnd all round athlete, is agahi on tho warpath. Ho has hurled a defi nt Stanley Ketchcl and 'Thlladelphln Jack" O'Brien. Itollcr says ho Is anxious to exchange Jabs, uppercuts and swings with either of tho two In n six, ten or twenty round bout. Ho thinks he Is the man to re gain the pugilistic crown now worn by Jnck Johnson to the white race. Itollcr has been before tho public In many rolls. Several years ago ho was a conspicuous figure In University of Pennsylvania athletics. Roller was a stalwart fellow when ho entered the medical school of the university, com ing from Do Pauw university, nnd he was at once picked for the football squad. Ho played In tho practice games, but was not on tho eleven bo cause It wns learned that he had played four years with tho Do Pauw team; therefore under tho football rules ho was Ineligible for tho univer sity cloven. Roller has had fairly good success In tho wrestling game and has met defeat only nt the hands of Cham pion Frank Gotch. Chicago Americans' New First Sacker. Tho snlo of "Chick" Arnold by tho Shroveport club to the Chicago Amer icans has been announced. Several teams havo been dickering for tho services of Arnold. Ho is nt present playing with tho Sacramento team of tho Pacific Coast league under the name of Gnndll. Last season "Chick" Arnold played first base for tho Pirates, but refused to report to Shrevcport this year, Jumping to tho California outlaws. In order that he remain in organized baseball tho Shroveport club loaned tho player to Sacramento of the Pa cific Coast league for tho remainder of tho season. As a member of this team Arnold has boon playing wonder ful ball. He attracted tho attention of several big league scouts, and as a re sult several clubs were anxious to grab him. Vegetable Diet For Athletes. Vegetables aro to form au important feature in the diet of the Irish Ameri can Athletic club athletes under the system which Is being urranged by Lawson Robertson, tho now trainer, who recently took up his duties at Celt ic park, New York. The now menu is more particularly designed to meet the requirements of the distance runners, for Trainer Robertson Is a firm be liever In tho system of diet adopted by E. R. Voiglit, five mller, who Is a vegetarian. Robertson claims that vegetables give moro endurance than meats and in hot weather aro better for tho general health. Baseball Follows the Flag. Baseball follows the flag even In our hot tropical possessions. In tho Pana ma canal zone two leagues played a series of games In tho season Just closed there. At Colon tho sport has taken such a hold on tho people that It Is proposed to put up n now base ball park prior to tho opening of tho next league season. Tho Panama Rail road company has granted tho ground for tho purpose, and the business men of Colon aro contributing to a fund for tho erection of an inclosuro and grand stand. The games draw attendances varying from GOO to 1,200 each game. New Park For Brooklyns. Though his team may bo too close to tho cellar to satisfy the Brooklyn fans, Charley Ebbets, president of tho Su p.n-bns, evidently believes thoy will bo bte money getters next year and Is having plans drawn up for a now sta dlum nt Washington park. Thedlamond may bo shifted around and n doublo deck grand stand built whero the 23 cent bleachers now stand and where there Is always a good breeze blowing, Tho diamond will bo laid whero tho left field foul line now stands, which would nld tho catcher in getting nfter foul balls In the sun. Boston Nationals' New Player. Tho first deal of the season between tho Southern league and a major league club Is announced In tho sale of Second Baseman Cranston of the Memphis team to tho Boston Nation als. Catcher Ball and an outfielder, In addition to a cash consideration, fig' ured la the trade. Satisfactory. "This Is a Jolly old world," said Short As abroad he started to so. "I've actually borrowed money enough To pay every cent that I owe." Detroit Free Press. Almost a Walkover. "Tell me, Is there anything on earth that new yacht of yours can't overtake and pass?" "I should say there Is." "What's that?" "Its running expenses." Puck. The Damper. Wo love the frame! Wo love to go And hear the crowded bleachers shriek In Joyous victory, but oh. You losing streak! Indianapolis News. That's the Question. Clifford can ask questions qulcket Iban wo can answer them, and a fcM days ago his undo told him he would turn Into an Interrogation point 1 agreod with him and said: "Yes, I re member seeing a plcturo of a Uttlo boj turning Into one. no had become moro and moro curved and finally had becomo Just a largo Interrogation point." Cliff listened Intently, and when 1 had finished ho Instantly asked, "Well how did they keep tho dot under hlmr Circle Magazine. JULY CLEARING SALE The Giant Event of the Season's End Every Passing Season finds our Stock Broken in everyldepartment. Small lots are bound to accumulate here and therein a busy store like ours. We never have and never will carry over goods from one season to another, no indeed, Sir, the policy df this house demands that the wearableelhere mentioned leaves us when the season does, so to this end we go through all departments and clip down the prices unmindful of the cost to us. July is not a time for profits. Here following we mean to speak in deeds of many saving opportunities not in words galorp ; so if that means anything to yon read on STHAUSE IIHOS. CLOTHES ALL SIZES. $15 Suits low $10 $18 Suits now $lil $20 Suits now $15 $25 Suits now $18 CHILDREN'S' $5 Suits $4 Suits . . . $3.50 Suits . $3.00 Suits , CLOTHES ALL SIZES. now $3.50 now $2.75 now 2.25 now $2.00 HOYS' WASH SUITS ALL SIZES. 50c, 75c, to $1.00 Worth Double the Price. Underwear at Remember the Place-aFull 11 C. HAND, President. W. 13. HOLMES, Vice Pres. We want you to understand the reasons for the ABSOLUTE SECURITY of WAYNE COUNTY HONE SD ALE, PA., HAS A CAPITAL OP AND SURPLUS AND PROFITS OF -MAKING ALTOGETHER EVERY DOLLAR of which must be lost before any depositor can lose alMtMiNY It has conducted a growing and successful business for over 35 years, serving an increasing number ot customers with Its cash lunas nro protected by MUUMiA siKhi, aults. All of these things, coupled with conservative management. Injured by tho C'AliEKUL PERSONA). ATTENTION constantly clven the Rank's affairs hy a notably able Hoard of Directors assures the patrons of tlmt SUl'KEMK SAFETY which Is the prime essential of a good Hank. Total Assets, 83T DEPOSITS MAY BE MADE BY MAIL. DIRECTORS C1IAS..T. SMITH. H.J.CONUKK. V F. SUYD.VM. ( HAND. T. SKAItLE. T. U. CLAKK Ten Cents Daily TEN CENTS SAVED every day will, in fifty years, grow to $9,504. TWENTY CENTS SAVED daily would in fifty years amount to $19,006. The way to accumulate money is to save small sums system atically,and with regularity. At 3 per cent, compound interest money doubles itself in 25 years and 104 days. At 0 per cent, money doubles itself in 11 years and 327 days. If vou would save 50 cents a day, in 50 years you would have $47,520. If vou would save $1.00 a day, at the end of 50 years you would have $95,042. Begin NOW a Savings Account at the THREE PER CENT. INTEREST PAID. Money loaned to all Wayne counteans furnish ing eood security. Notes discounted. Hrst morteaee on real estate taken. Safest and cheap est way to send money to foreign countries Is by drafts, to be had at this bank. HOUSEHOLD BANKS Fit EE. Telephone Announcement This company is preparing to do extensive construction work in the Honesdale Exchange District which will greatly improve the service and enlarge the system Patronize the Independent Telephone Company which reduced telephone rates, anddo not contract for any other service without conferring with our Contract Department Tel. No. 300. CONSOLIDATED TELEPHONE CO. of PENNSYLVANIA. Foster Building. CITIZEN PRINT COUNTS First, Last and All the time for the Best LANDAN BRAND CLOTHES ALL SIZES. $10 Suits now $7 $1) Suits now $0 $8 Suits now $5 $7 Stilts now $1 MEN'S DRESS SHIRTS ALL SIZES. Eclipse shirts, high grade in every respects. Coat cut, cull's attached: $1.50 value nt $1.00 $1.00 value nt 70c. TRUNKS AND DRESS SUIT CASES AT HALF PRICE. Reduced Prices. Line of Everything. II. S. SALMON, Cashier W. J. WARD, Ass't Cashier this Rank. SAVINGS BANK $100,000.00 355,000.00 455,000.00 lulelity and satistaction. $2,733,000.00 V. II. HOLMES P.P. KI.MHLE 11. S. SALMON Honesdale Dime Bank V
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers