The citizen. (Honesdale, Pa.) 1908-1914, July 14, 1909, Image 6

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    TDK CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JULY 14, 1000.
RESOLUTION SHATTERED.
The
Moral Suasion Scheme Didn't
Work on Jack Jones.
A little boy came home one day
from school In a very bad humor. An
other boy, Jack Jones, had given htm
e thrashing, and he wanted revenge.
"Oh," said his mother, "don't think
of revenge, Willie. Be kind to Jack.
Heap coals of Are on his head. Then
lio will become yoar friend."
Willie thought he would try this
method. So the next day at recess,
Jnst as he was buying a lemon pie for
luncheon, Jack appeared and said:
"Look here, I licked you yesterday,
but 1 didn't give you enough. Now
Tm going to lick you again."
And he planted a hard blow on
Willie's little stomach.
Willie gasped, but Instead of strik
ing back he extended his pie to Jones.
"Here," he said In a kindly voice,
Til glvo you this. I make you a
present of it."
Jack, in glad amazement, fell upon
the pie greedily, and it had soon dis
appeared. "Gosh, it was good!" he said. "What
did you give It to me for?"
"Because you struck me," said the
leaper of the coals.
Instantly Jack hauled off and
struck him again. "Now go and ,et
another pie," he said. Ladies' Home
Journal.
FINANCE.
Landlord I'll give you ten per cent,
off if you'll pay the rent to-morrow.
Tenant Thank you. Now, suppose
you let me have that ten per cent
now and I'll pay it to you on account
to-day.
Exasperating.
From the dark kitchen there eman
ated a series of thumps and angry ex
clamations. Jones was looking for
the cat.
"Pa!" called the son from the stair
way. "Go to bed and let me alone," blurt
ed Jones. "I've just barked my shins."
"Pa!" insisted Tommy, after a mo
ment's silence.
"Well, what is it? Didn't I tell you
to keep quiet?"
"I I didn't hoar your shins bark."
And the next moment Tommy was
being pursued by an angry sire with
a hard hair brush.
A Sharp Retort.
"My dear," said a thin little Brigh
ton man to his wife, "this paper says
that there is a woman down in Devon
shire who goes out and chops wood
with her husband."
"Well, what of it? I think he
could easily do it if he is thin as you
are. I have often thought of using
you to peel potatoes with."
The thin man laid down his paper
with a sigh that sounded like the
squeak of a penny whistle.
Again Those Immigrants.
Little Eleanor's mother was an
American, while her father was a
German.
One day, after Eleanor had been
subjected to rather severe disciplin
ary measures at the hands of her
paternal ancestor, she called her
mother into another room, closed the
door significantly and said, "Mother,
I don't want to meddle in your bus!
ness of yours back to Germany."
Almost as Good.
Little Ikey came up to his father
with a very solemn face.
"Is it true, father," he asked, "that
marriage is a failure?"
His father surveyed him thought
fully for a moment.
"Well, Ikey," be finally replied, "If
you get a rich wife it's almost as good
as a failure."
Very Singular.
"That second speaker was a very
singular man."
"There was nothing In his appear
ance to indicate singularity'."
"But didnl yon notice that when
he got up be dldnt say the toast
master's introductory remarks re
minded him of a story V
What H Wanted.
Small Boy (applying for situation)
What kind of a boy does yer want?
Merchant A nloo quiet boy that
doesnt nso bod words, smoke cigar
ettes, whistle around the office, play
or get into mischief
all Boy Yer dont want no boy;
yer want a goiL Bee?
Double Charge, Anyhow.
Howell Bid you have double pneU'
monla?
Powel I guess so; the dootor
charged me twioe as much oa
thought he woufcL
Rather Dubious,
"Tea, ma'am; thto la genuine spring
Iub," deoMred. the Butcher,
NEW SHORT STORIES
Irish Versus Dutch.
Once there wns a chief of police in
St. Louis who was in continual war
fare with th( Germans who were on
the force, says the Saturday Evening
Fost. He thought the Irish were the
finest policemen in the world nnd the
Germans the worst.
One day, at assembly,, he said: "Mlu,
have you your guidebooks with you?
Some day I am going to ask you tb.3
different places of interest in the city.
so I will know If you tell strangers
right I think I will do it now. Kelly
nnd Schmidt, stand up. I will exam
ine you two.
"Now, Kelly, 1 will examine you
first. Watch sharp now, for I will
ask you some very hard questions. I
will trip you. Listen: Where is the
courthouse located?"
"Broadway and Market"
"Bight you are. Now look out!
Whore are the Four Courts?"
"Twelfth and Clarke avenue."
"Bight again. Mark that, Schmidt.
No.w, where Is my office located in said
building?"
"Northwest corner."
"Docs the book say that?"
"Yes."
"The book is wrong; northwest wing.
Where is the city hall?"
"Bight opposite your ofTlco."
"Bight. There's no use of my trying
to catch you. You know everything In
"I 1IAVU YOU ON THE PIUST ONI!, IIH?"
the book. Now, Schmidt, I am goin'
to ask you where Is the Kokoino build
ing?" Schmidt scratched his head and said
ho didn't know.
"Ah, ha! I have you on the first
one, eh? Kelly, how many elevators
are they in the Kokoino building?"
"Eight."
"There you go. The Irish beats the
Dutch any time. Like you, Schmidt.
You do not oven know where the Ko
koino building is, and Kelly knows how
many elevators there is in it. I fine
you two days' pay, Schmidt, for not
knowing your book."
P. S. There is no Kokomo buildln
In St. Louis Saturday Evening Tost.
Adee's Blissful Ignorance.
A. A. Adee, the assistant secretary
of stale and one of the most accom
plished men in the American diplomat
ic fc-crviee, always spends his vacations
on bicycling tours abroad. Mounted
on his favorite wheeled steed, ho lias
traversed all of Europe and is one of
the best informed men in tho world
on France tho country. Every sum
mer he takes his annual leave and
his bike and crosses to tho other side
on pleasure bent, seeking out the un
frequented roads and remote and In
teresting districts. A camera swung
over Ills shoulder is' brought into play
whenever a striking view presents
itself to him, and ho has a most inter
esting collection of quaint, odd and
beautiful pictures.
Mr. Adee is extremely deaf, but lu
splto of this good fortune has always
attended him on his travels, and he
has never had a serious accident ne
travels alone and gathers a great store
of stories, which ho tells upon his re
turn with evident relish and a strong
English accent which is delightful.
One is obliged to place his lips almost
In tho secretary's ear in order to make
him hear nnd to shout at the top of
his lungs.
One day tho newspaper correspond
ents stationed at tho state, war and
navy department building tried to ob
tain some information from Mr. Adee
and, falling, went over to the room
where the late John Hay was enthron
ed as secretary of state. They asked
tho great premier about' tho matter,
and he gave them tho desired, infor
mation. "Why," said tho correspondents, "Mr.
Adee said he didn't know anything
about this."
"I guess he hadn't hoard Ct," retort
ed Secretary Hay with that dry hu
mor for which ho was noted. Boston
2Ierald.
"A Cheap Skate,"
"Joel Chandler Harris," said an At
lantan, "used to write comic newspa
per editorials. Sometimes he made
fun of rival editors In them too.
"Simon Simpson, a rival editor An
Mobile, having been made fun of,
wrote angrily in his rag:
"'Joel Harris has been getting ofl
some cheap wit at our expense.'
"Joel on reading this grabbed his
pen and dashed off quick as a flash for
next day;-
-- "
CHOICE MISCELLANY
America's Throne Room.
The cabinet room in the White
House is America's nearest approach
to a throne room. It is about the size
of the dining room in nn average coun
try house of the colonial stylo. It is
almost severely simple. The coloring
is olive green and white white wood
work with olive green burlap on the
walls.
The chairs of the president nnd his
nine cabinet ministers, which suYround
the long mahogany table in the center
of the room, are covered with green
leather. The president's differs from
the others in that the back is a trifle
higher. On a small metal plate on the
back of csch chair Is the title of the
holder and the date of his accession,
but not bis name.
On one side of the cabinet table is
a fireplace, with "a very high mantel'
piece over it On the other is a ca
pacious leather covered divan. At one
end of the table are the sliding doors
leading to the president's private of
fice, at the other three largo French
windows looking out across the White
House grounds toward Pennsylvania
avenue. There aro leather covered
armchairs in the corners. The room
is practically without decoration. A
room more completely symbolizing re
publican simplicity it would be diffi
cult to imagine. Circle Magazine.
Fastest Speaker In the Commons.
Mr. Blrrcll is said to be now the
fastest speaker in the house of com
mons. Mr. Haldane's speed in his
three hours' performance when he ex
plained the army estimates the year
before last had, the Monchester Guard
ian points out, been regarded as a rec
ord, Mr. Bryce in presenting the
Irish laborers' bill to the house beat
the secretary for war. Mr. Blrrcll out
stripped both. In the twenty minutes
he poured out about 3,200 words, a
speed of ICO words per minute, includ
ing stops. The nctual average speed
was about 200 words a minute. West
minster Gazette.
Vienna's Hunting Exhibition.
Tho first International hunting and
field sport cxhiblton will be held at
Vienna from May to October, 1010, un
der tho patronage of Emperor Francis
Joseph. A notice from 'the publicity
bureau says: "The cxhiblton promises
to be a first class attraction, at which
nearly every country will bo repre
sented. Not tho least Interesting fea
ture will be an instructive section, giv
ing not only a picture of the various
historical and modern methods of
hunting, together with the various
weapons in use, but also containing a
collection of ancient hunting litera
ture." An Ice Telephone.
In laying the telephone wires to the
Regina Margherita meteorological ob
servatory on Mount Rosa It was found
impossible to use either the overhead
or underground method. The snow
and glacier ice prevent the latter and
tho fear of storms the former. On tho
other hand, nn insulated cable would
sink in tho ice if laid on it. So the
plan has been tried of laying the wire
on tho ice Itself, trusting to this for
insulation. This is tho highest tele
phono lino in Europe, the observatory
standing at a height of 14,508 feet,
London Standard.
Beaver's Tail Is a Trowel.
Then there is tho beaver, whose tail,
I am convinced, is a trowel. I know
of no naturalist who has mentioned
this, but such negative evidence is of
little weight. The beaver, as every
body knows, is a builder that cuts
down trees and piles log upon log uiv
til ho has raised a solid, domed cabin
from seven to twenty feet in diameter,
which he then plasters over with clay
and straw. If ho does not turn around
and beat the work smooth with his
tall, then I require to know for what
purposo ho carries that broad, heavy
and hard tool behind him. Strand
Magazine.
Abdul Hamid's Money.
It is declared that the deposed Ah
dul Hamid's treasure, found at Ylldlz
kiosk, of which no one yet knows the
value, is composed exclusively of
money. The late sultan received large
sums in new banknotes. According to
curious statistics which have just been
compiled at tho ministry of finance,
these banknotes, of which tie num
bers always were registered, did not
again appear In circulation. The same
holds good of newly struck coins, gold
nnd silver, which, once having entered
Yildlz kiosk, never camo out again.
The Wealth of France.
Nearly every nation under tho sun
fa today paying golden tribute to
France, She has an army of credit
ors, but no debtors. About twos core
governments have to remit interest
donds on the capital for her small in
vestors represent earnings in all parts
of the world. The road to Paris be
comes, therefore, tho route of least re
sistance for tho flonOng gold supplies.
Paris 1b absorbing Into her banks from
35 to 40 per cent of the metal freshly'
takenfrom the mines. Argonaut
Polar Explorations.
Canada, Denmark, France, Germany,
England, IRnsala, Sweden and the Unit
ed States, were In 1008 represented
omong the twelve expeditions which
were struggling -toward the north pole.
"Eight leaders were veterans Peary
End. Cook of the United States, Bet
nle of Canada, Erichsen and Rasmus-
CfrriP1" Denmark, Charcot of France,
ion of England and Qeer of
FOR THE CHILDREN
A List of Books For Boys.
Tho following is a course of reading
suitable for n boy of high school age,
from twelve to seventeen years, pre
pared by Frederick K. Law of the
English department in Stuyvcsant
high school, New York city, to cover
a period of four years:
First Year 1, "Tho Talisman," by
Scott; 2, "Marmlon," by Scott; 3 "Ore
gon Trail," by Farkman; 4, "Bracc
brldgo nail," by Irving; 5, "Tho Jun
gle," by Kipling; 0, "Tho Tent on tho
Beach," by Whlttlcr.
Second Year 1, "She Stoops to Con
quer," by Goldsmith; 2, "A Comedy of
Errors," by Shakespeare; 3, "Essays,"
by Lamb; 4, "The Mill on tho Floss,"
by Eliot; 5, "Enoch Anion, by Tenny
son; C, "Cranford," by Mrs. Gaskell.
Third Year 1, "nenry IV.," by
Shakespeare; 2, "David Copperfleld,"
by Dickens; 3, "King of the Golden
niver," by Ruskln; 4, "Tho White
Company," by Doyle; 5, "The Cloister
and tho Hearth," by Readc; 0, "Birds,
Bees and Sharp Eyes," by Burroughs.
Fourth Year 1, "King Lear," by
Shakespeare; 2, "Lorna Doono," by
Blackmore; 3, "Westward Ho!" by
Kingslcy; 4, "Paradise Lost," by Mil
ton; 5, "Little Rivers," by Van Dyke;
C, "Kenllworth," by Scott.
When a boy has read tho books
named and has read them well he will
have developed n taste for good litera
ture. NewYork World.
Tho Game of Fives.
In this game the players take turns
to bit n ball with tho hand above the
line marked on a wall. Sometimes
bats are substituted for the hand.
This is the simple game of fives, but
tho more complicated kind is played in
court.
There are two kinds of courts, the
Eton court and the Rugby court.
In both games the players try to hit
the ball above a line about three feet
or four feet from the ground or ledge
on the front wall in such a way as to
prevent their opponents hitting it back
again over the line before it has touch
ed tho ground for the second time.
The game begins by one of the play
ers "serving" the ball by striking it
against the wall and making it fall
into the side of the court where hts ad
versary Is. The latter returns it, and
the game goes on until one of the play
ers misses the ball or else falls to
strike it above tho line. The miss
counts a point for the adversary. The
game counts fifteen points, but the
rules vary according to the different
courts in which they are played.
The Value of a Comma.
The trustee of a country school was
on his rounds, and at one of his exanv
inations of the pupils tho question was
raised as to tho value of a comma,
This tho trustee treated with some
thing like scorn, claiming that the
comma didn't amount to a row of pins
Tho teacher, who had at various limes
impressed its value on his pupils,
thereupon called on one of the bright
boys of the school to give an example
of what ho thought was the comma's
value by writing a sentence on the
blackboard. Tho boy smiled at the
teacher and promptly wrote on the
board, "nenry Jones says tho trustee
is a dunce." Naturally the trustee got
angry and demanded that tho teacher
punish tho boy for his impertinence,
But the boy, with a word of apology,
told the teacher that his example was
not complete. Then ho wrote, "Henry
Jones, says the trustee, is a dunce."
And tho trustee had to acknowledge
that the comma, after all, is sometimes
a good thing to use. Chicago News.
Old Sir Simon and Young Sir Simon,
All the players join hands and form
a circle, dancing round and singing
"Old Sir Simon, the knight, and young
Sir Simon, the squire." Then they stop,
and, saying "This is how old Sir SI
mon goes," they hobble about like do
crepit old men, after which they strut
about with their chins in the air, say-
ing, "But this is how young Sir Simon
goes."
They then join hands and dance
round, singing ns before, "Old Sir SI
mon, the knight, nnd young Sir SI
mon, the squire." Next time they
may imitate tho stroking of beards for
the old man and tho twirling of mus
taches for the young one, but tho game
can be varied indefinitely if the leader
Is a good one.
Light From Crystals.
Many crystals when split or crushed
give a faint flash of light visible In
tho dark. Sugar is one of tho sub
stances which do this. The cause of
this behavior is not very well under
stood. St. Nicholas.
My Woodland Friends.
As I go singing all alone
Down woodland paths, so green
cool.
That wind through flickering sua
and
and
enaae, '
By rush! as brook or silent pool,
Tho tall trees Beem to bend their tops,
The pine cones tumble at my feet.
The nodding ferns stand quietly.
As though they wished my song to
greet.
And in some dim and shadowy cove
The wild lobelia, flaming red.
Stands listening on Its slender etem
Or waves a welcome from Its bed.
The squirrel peeps from out the leaves.
The sun oomes stealing through to sea
Who dares to hush tbe wild bird's sang
And saunters by so carelessly.
Bo as I wander all alone
Through dusky paths that bend tend
wind
Z move amid a company
Of wlldwood friends most dear aod
INTERNATIONAL NEWSPAPER
BIBLE STUDY CLUB.
Answer One Written .Question
Each Week For Fifty-Two
Weeks and Win a Prize.
July 18, 1909.
(Copyright. 1000, by Key. T. S. I.inscott. D.D.)
Paul's Second Missionary Journey
Thessalonlca and Berea. Acts xvll:
1-15.
Golden Text Thy word have I hid
In mine heart, that I may not sin
against thee. Ps. cxlx:ll.
Verses 1-2 Is church going a good
habit and what do they lose who have
not formed It?
How many times a day should a
person attend church?
What is the value of a good habit,
and how are good habits formed?
Verse 3. Did Paul mean to say that
It was necessary for the Jews to have
put Jesus to death, and if not what did
he mean? (This question must be an
swered In writing by members of the
club.)
(The position taken by tho present
writer is, that the Jews ought to have
accepted Jesus, and, that their putting
bim to death is tho colossal crime
of history, and tho calamity of calam
ities that has befallen the Jews. That
there are two distinct lines of conting
ent prophecy in tho Old Testament
either one of which being fulfilled,
would cancel tho other; and that the
prophecies concerning the perpetuation
of the Jewish nation and tho throne of
David with unparalleled splendor,
were cancelled by tho fulfillment of
those concerning the rejection of
Christ. God sent Jesus in good faith.
and they voluntarily rejected him,
when God's first and best plan was
that they should accept him. God
then proceeded to do through the
death of Christ, that which would
have been done more speedily by his
life.)
Is It necessary for us to adopt all
Paul's opinions, in order to be well-
pleasing to God?
Were all Paul's opinions correct con
corning the time of the second coming
of Christ?
In what sense was it true, "that
Christ must needs have suffered?"
(See Luke xxiv:2C, .Tor. xxiii:5-G, Mich,
v:2. Matt. 11:4-0.)
In what way do the Old Testament
Scriptures bear testimony that Jesus
is the Christ?
Verses 4-r How do you account for
it that the same facts and reasoning
which converts some only serves to
harden others?
How is it that women are generally
In tho majority In Christ's converts?
Why were the Jews moved with
jealousy?
Can a jealous man, at tho time,
either be a true man or a correct rea-
soner?
How do you characterize a person
who is jealous of another in doing
good woiks?
Have wo any modern example of the
way these people acted?
Verse fi Is tho world, to-day, upside
down, or ris?ht side up?
Is the world getting better or worse?
Verse 7 When people oppose the
work of God do thay generally confine
themselves to the truth in their ob
jections, or do they ever confine them
selves to the truth?
Do objectors to tho truth knowingly
falsify or do they do it in blind ignor
ance, or through prejudice?
Verses 10-12 7s thero ever any vir
tue in exposing ourselves to danger,
when it is not necessary in the inter
ests of the truth?
What was the difference between
the religious people of Thessalonlca
and those of Berea?
Is a truth seeker sure to find it?
Is It ever right to suppress the truth
in the Interests of the Kingdom of
God?
Versos 13-15 What is it which
prompts men to work so hard, and
persistently in opposing what they
know to be the truth?
Lesson for Sunday, July 25th, 1909
Paul's Second Missionary Journey
Athens. Acts xvii:16-34.
Turkey's Westminster Abbey.
Tho mosquo of Eyoub, where Mo
hammed V. was invested with tho
sword of Osman, is sometimes termed
"the Westminster abbey of Turkey,"
for within its walls all save one or
two of tho long line of Ottoman sul
tans have undergono the ceremony
which corresponds to coronation. The
mosque, though not large, Is a mag
nificent cxamplo of oriental architoc
ture, built of white marble and deco
rated with Persian tiles. It stands
amid lovely groves at the extremity
of tho Golden Horn and derives Its
name from Eyoub, friend and stand
ard bearer of tho prophet wfto was
kflled at the first siege of Constanti
nople and whose bo rial place tbe
mosque Is said to occupy. It Is es
teemed the holiest Mussulman temple
In Europe and remains to this day un
trodden by non-Moslem foot. West
minster Gazette.
Wanted to Land.
Tho big airship was beyond control
and drifting aimlessly over Indiana,
As it passed over a cornfield a farmer
mado a megaphone of bis freckled
hands and bellowed:
"Hey, yon, up thart"
"Hollar answered tho frightened
aeronaut.
"Want to reach Terro Haute V
Tbe man in the airship smiled gxfan
17.
"Gracious, no, friend! What I want
to reach is terra flrma." Chicago
News.
r
HOME DRESSMAKING
By Charlotte Martin.
COMBINATION UNDERGARMENT.
Pattern No. 5429. This graceful
combination skirt and corset cover
is fitted quite closely to the figure
and closes at tho side. Tho front
panel is straight as far down as the
buttons, below it flares, giving extra
fullness at tho hem. The edges are
finished with narrow lace.
Cut In 3 sizes, 32, 36 and 40 bust
measure. Size 36 requires ZVt yards
of 36-inch material.
LADIES' AND MISSES' CAPE.
Pattern No. 54 1G. The graceful
folds of this capo make it a gar
ment especially suited to wear over
tho fluffy gowns of afternoon and
evening. Grey blue cloth was used
to make it and tho edges are left un
finished and bordered with a row of
stitching. Tho scarf is of soft black
satin with silk tassels at tho ends.
The back view shows the capo cut in
misses' length. By tho use of nar
row bindings tho pattern is ndapt
ablo to any material.
The ladies' capo takes 2 yards
of 54-inch material and the misses
2 yards.
LADLES' FOUK GORED SKIRT.
Pattern No. B431. This skirt has
the grace of a circular skirt without
fta liability to sag at the Bides. The
material is striped tailor suiting and
the bias fold adds to its attractive
ness. Cut In 0 sizes, 22 to 30 waist mea
sure. Size 26 requires 6 yards of
27-inch material for straight ot
goods, or 7 yards bias of goods.
HOW TO) ORDER PATTEKWS.
Send FIVE cents for each pattern
desired to Charlotte Martin, 4M W.
23rd Street, New Yorfc. Stats No. ,
,.:! men ipraiBT awM i,
kitod.
-fit Nicholas.
of pattern and sice wanted.