5
ANE
ne
a a ——
. wedges,
Se at fC
THE BAREFOOT TRAIL.
Out of the dear fro nt gate it ran
Into the sun 2 ‘ 1a
Traversed the
Arched by
Crossed the past
Entered the
Rambled, loiter 1 ve and
Turned io mother and home again.
the m
copse,
re ar
Btreet and pasin
Back to m
thls trail tes hot,
sun for
ok that knew it not,
ting and turning frem scene to scene,
checkered the realm of the gold and
Souter boyhood, slim ;
vhistle and tattered brim
» to beckon afar, and then
d to I HE and home again.
a tale,
secret and many
lo wed
AQAA RRRRAN
RRR EL EARL NALA ARAL AF ALAA RA AR LAE ARAL ARE
Young Lumberman’s “Samson.”
By C. A. Stephens.
PPPPRFEEREP ERPS EPS RRNRRERERERERRARENENY
AARNE ALRZACAL
x
CPREDRRRERY’
ROPLN
The Stoss Pon
east of the old
been at one
growth of
ever, had cu
my time, all except
old pine, which stood near
ravine of Stoss :
At first view
thou
woodsmen to spare
of all! the thous
slaughtered for lu
reason was mit
pine stood Ww
brink of the
heavily
despaired of
vay.
If it fell across the
ficulty would have attendce
the heavy |
trunk woul
be so brok
unfit for 1
They
had
a fine
time covered wi
, i nt
mberme
off foriy
one tree,
years
ght sentiment
over
making
ravine
ravi
re let it
went thei to other Jot
The gorge of the
forty feet
brook
deep, stec p-sid
being a 1
but
Sprir later
a fine str
pine, as
ed, although
bermen
it up as a bad bar
protected it
often looked
quite
tree was probably two
a white pine more than
diameter, tall and witho
forty or feet. In o
creased in size but slowly,
One day in October, my |
cousin Ac 1 had zone up to
Steoss Pond to a 1
high-bush cranbes
there for
household je 3 ly.
after some young cattle ti
pastured during the summer in
openings about the pond.
As we were looking for the y«
stock, now grown quite wila and
we went nast the sglitary old pine.
and were led to stop and contempl
it with a speculative eye. For at this
time Addison and I had begun to
tend Waynor Academy and cher
hopes of fitting for college—t
deemed a somewhat bold design.
The old squire had intimated to us|
pretty plainly that if we went to col-
lege at all we. should have to pay our
own way there. A common-school
education was all that he felt gble to
give us. Now nothing so sharpens a
boy’s wits as an awakening am
to obtain an education; nothing
him more keenly on the lookout to
make a dollar. That afternoon at the
pond our talk turned to planus for earn-
ion
puis
m
ing money. It was with this in mind
that we stopped to look at the old
pine.
“I’m pretty sure that tree's got three
thousand feet of lumber in it,” Addison
remarked. “It's worth forty dollars
a thousand after it's hauled and saw-
ed. There's a hundred dollars’
worth
of lumber in that tree if we could only
get it out.”
“That's where the hitch comes,”
said. “It leans ten feet out of plumb.
It is bound to fall into that gully ”
“There cought to be some way of get-
ting it,” Addison said. “Yet s as} )
old squire if he will let us
he north-
| the bl
i doilars’
| required for
and there
locks mi
rope; was the liability that
be smashed He the
trunk failing on them. Fifteen
worth of extra line would be
s0 long a haul.
not like to pay out
having, indeed, very
iree
We did
money,
so much
little ot
{ our own.
{ how we can
Time uniil the second day
after presidential eieciion and the first
in our that morn-
son singing out, “Gen-
elected again—and I know
push down Stoes Pond
passed
1g I heard room
ing wg
eral Grant's
[841
Ss Addi
| Pine!”
c | feet
{
3 i one wa
| down
e | the
| large and
|
|
{
|
|
staried for
our axe-handles had
| the lever.
*How 7?" over the
not seem to
said |, mr
election news, which
have muct
*1I'iy
there!” cried
‘S th
did
1 to do with the pine.
when we get up
Ww you
Addison.
11 push it
“I've got. a
over.”
it out?” said 1.
he. t came to me
a morning. It's with
leve I know just how we ean do
t. See here,” and he got a little block
of wood and two sticks, and then pro-
ceeded to illustrate his Samson
ast a chairpost.
ould see neither head nor tail
14 1, but was inclined to take
word for it, since he was
genius of
vs the mechanical the
after bre
0 bank Yo
out-buildings for win-
job: but the
ground our axes and
Addison ex-
we went on.
the stable and
all-day
next forenoon we
| plained a little as
**The first thing wanted is two
| spruce poles,” said he. Two strong,
stiff spruce poles, one for the lever,
| the other for the lifter, and the one
| for the lever will have to be thirt
long.”
Higher up the mountainside there
BI was a hicks growth of spruce, and
{ here we cut the two poles. The longer
Ss fully
very
five inches in diameter,
heavy; but as the way was
hill, we contrived to drag it to
pine. The ‘lifter’ was not as
but twenty feet in length—
each a two-foet
them.
and
measure laid off on
Directly on the brink of the ravine
and hence about ten feet from the |
butt of the pine, stood a little horn-
beam tree, four or five inches in di-
ameter.
“That's good,” said Addison. “We
will fell that and cut the stump off
square. It will do for the fulcrum of
I now began to understand it all a
tle better. The long arm of the
lever was to extend out over the gully
it was to rest on the hornbean stump.
The lifter was to stand on the short
arm of the lever, and have the upper
end of it “toed” in a notch cut into the
pine trunk twenty feet from the
ground.
But by this time
culties began to We needed a
ladder, some bits of rope and several
hens and were obliged rather
reluctant to give up the ungdertak-
ing for the time being and return
home—two miles and a half.
We had made a beginning, however,
and at the dinner-table the old squire
hecame so much interested in Addi-
son's account of the experiment that
not a few
arise.
difii-
Accordingly, as we sat t supp
: Eg J i . : { he announced his intention of return-
that night, after speaking of the young |
: ih > { ing with us’ I now imagine that the
cattle, Addison said: antl v
hats x : . old gentleman had fears lest we
Sir, may we have 8ioss Pond pine nd $14 3 ;
3 might be injured by our contrivance.
for our school expenses next y : y :
We did not want him to go, but
The old squire laughed. ad ll s tat
“I have looked Rng said nothing outright. Our cousin Hal-
A3Ve red at that tree many 1 J sl
a > oo i 2 ya stead, who had heen away on a visit,
time,” Le said. Samson himself | Fonie v
Sy : returned that forenoon, and he, too,
could not push it over this way; and | _. . .
: ] went along.
it would be a pity to smash it up in .
As there were four of us, we hitch-
the gully.”
“But may we have it if we can fell
it this way?’ Ad asked.
“Yes,” said the squire, “if you can
fell it this way.”
Addison said no more; but after-
wards, between ourselves, we talked it
over. By chopping a scarf into a
"leaning tree on the side toward which
you wish it to fall, then sawing into it
on the other side, and driving in steel
such as are used in.splitting
four-foot logs for cord wood, a tree
can be forced over when it dees not
lean too heavily. But I do not believe
Stoss Pond pine could have been made
to fall south by that method. It
leaned too heavily to the and
was too large a tree to be lifted over
by wedges.
We thought also of using a tackle
and blocks, attaching one Pk high
up in the tree, and making the ground
block fast to another tree, a hundred
feet or more away, on the south side.
When all was ready the pine could be
cut nearly off and a horse or four men
set to haul on the tacle rope. In that
way the pine might perhaps have been
pulled over in the right direction. °
But many practical difficulties at-
tended this plan. We should have to
purchase five hundred feet of strong
gully
ed up one of the work-horses and
drove most of the way by a cart road
through the pasture-lands. We took
a ladder, bits of rope and spikes, and
also a strong five-bushel apple-basket,
a use for which we had begun
see. :
Addison had been afraid that fie
old squire would pooh-pooh the plan
but after locking it over for some time
he said that he should not wonder if
it worked well. © We were then both
very glad that he had come, so as to
bear a hand with us at raising the
long lever into position.
This really required the strength of
to fore-
all four of us. It was a long, heavy
stick, and it was necessary to set it
projecting over the ravine at an angle
of about thirty degrees.
To get as great leverage as pos
ble, we made the short arm of
lever but two feet and the lang
twenty-eight feet.
After the notch was cut, twenty
feat up the trunk of the pine, the up-
per end of the lifter stick was fitted
to it and the lower end adjusted to
the short arm of the lever. To hold it
in place there, it was toed in with
spikes, so that if any jostle occurred
it would not slip off. The lever was
e
arm
toed loosely to the fulcrum, so
it would not slip aside.
more was occupied in
trim for work.
vas slung on
alse
{ that
An hour or
| getting Samscen in
| Afterward rhe big basket
i the leng arm of the lever, so that it
could be slid the e end
of it, over the ravine. Then setting
to work, we began brir ging up stones
from the bed of the gully to fill the
basket, until we had in it what the
old squire estimated at five hundred
treme
out to
, pounds’ weight.
i x ‘nder this sirain the lever sprang
: and the lifter showed sighs of
! 1ekling. It might well be so, for if
our estimates were correct, we were
of seven tho usind
trunk.
applying a
pounds
pressure
the
pine
were,
seated, as it
his r to the piHar, the
next thing was to~undercut the: pine.
Addison now began chopping. a scarf
el au
on the south side, w it one op-:
| posite, and a little higher, on the side
§ Bx! the gully. As the foot of the
| lifter was set hetween eight:and nine
i feet back from the tree, there was
i space to swing an axe on that side.
i. [It is no light task to cut down a
| tree three feet in diameter. Addison
y and ¥ were fully on hour opening. our
| two scarfs. So heavily did the pine
| lean back toward the gully .that the
| scarfs had very nearly met.at the
! heart before the steady lift of the lev-
counterweight
to fall
the
inclination
ers prevailed
and overcame
to the north.
over
the
Halstead and the old squire sat
looking on in scme little anxiety. It
was a critical moment. We all had
doubts as to the result. Then slowly
the lofty top moved over to the south.
| “She's going over!” shouted Halse.
i “Hurrah!!!
{| “Run, boys!” cried the old squire.
“Run back out of the way!”
and slowly at first, then
' :n downward rush,
riant of two centuries fell south- |
| Ponderousiy
ith a sudd
THE PULPIT.
A BRILLIANT SUNDAY SERMON BY
THE R:V. DR. LYMAN ABBOTT.
Subject: “The Spirit of Christianity.”
3rookiyn, N. Y. — At Plymouth
Church, the Rev, Lyman Abbott, D. D.,
occupied his old pulpit in the absence
present pastor, the Rev. N. D.
Dr. Abbott's subject was “The
ential Spirit of Christianity.” He
: for his text the passage Matthew
37-28: “Whosoever will be chief
among you let him be your servant,
even as the. Sen of Man came, not to
be ministered unto, but to minister.
and ‘ to give - Fis: life a ransom ifor
wany,” and said: :
What do we mean'by Christianity?
What essential, specific spirit?
v
What is iis
It is the spirit of the Christ who *‘came
not to be ministered unto, but to minis-
ter.” The spirit of the Christian is to
be Tike the Christ. It is to get back of
all that is injurious and all that is val-
nable: all the accretions that are injur-
and all the additions which have
been made in the growth of Christian-
ity. doctrine, ritual and institutional;
to get-back to the time of Christ Him-
self. and, if we can, see what Chris-
tianity meant then and there, in order
that we may get at the essential spirit
of it. :
There
i1
appeared at the beginning of
the so-called Christian era a religious
teacher in a province of Palestine. He
was certainly for that age and for all
ages a singular man. The things we
care for most He seemed to be indiffer-
ent to. He did not care for pleasure,
but He was not ascetic. He did not
hide Himself from the world. There
is no instance in which He refused an
invitation to a feast. He began His
ministry be creating wine to prolong
the festivities at a marriage feast, and
yet He did not care for what men call
pleasure. He said Himself that He
“had not where to lay His head.” He
often aid down to sleep with only the
he g overhead. He lived on the sim-
ward and struck the earth with a | Je did not care for wealth.
crash! i led a man a fool but once,
Our Samson had done its work well; | 1d that was the man who spent all his
and it may be that others who have ! in accumulaating and then did not
: i know what to do with the accumnla-
leaning trees to fell will find the tions. He did not care for power, for
| scheme advantageous. From this pire | when He was offered a crown He re-
| we cut five -fifteen-foot logs and one | fused it. One day they gathered about
| other, smaller and shorter. It made |i. waved palm branches and
i a little less than three hundred feet of
boards and the sum which we rec d
from it was seventy doll:
Youth's :
about
Companion.
QUAINT AND CURIOUS
Throughout. Denmark there is
one person over ten years of age
cannot read and write.
not
who
lighthouse in the
| world that is not placed en any mar-
iner’s chart. It is in the Arizona des-
ert, and marks the spot where a well
supplies pure, fresh water to travel
ers.
There is one
A specimen of a herd of the small-
est sheep in the world—they are only
nineteen inches high at the withers—
i is now to be seen at the Natural His-
| tory Museum at South Kensington,
| England.
The postal ‘departments say Chicago
is often and horribly misspelled by for-
eigners. It is said that the word has
been spelled in 189 different ways.
Here are some of the most puzzling:
Zizazo, Japago, Hipaho, Jagiga, Scheec-
chacho, Hizago, Chachcho and Shi-
cahbzdo.
Human hairs are not as might be
supposed perfectly eylindrieal, but are
| more or less flattened in one direction.
| The most cylindrical hair is most in-
clined to grow straight, while hair that
is much flattened has a tendency to
curl; and the flatter the hair the
greater this tendency. This is the
main cause of curly hair; but the read-
iness with which hair absorbs mois-
ture also affects curliness.
Four years ago, William Rockefel-
ler, the Standard oil magnate, began
an action at law against an old army
veteran named Lamore, for trespass
on the magnificent Rockefeller estate
at Malone, N. Y. The jury returned
a verdict in favor of Mr. Rockefeller
and awarded him eighteen cents dam-
ages. Lamcre'*s attorney appealed
the case. It has taken a dozen turns,
but is still in the courts. Rockefeller
is trying to get his eighteen cents and
Lamore is trying to keep from paying
it. .
The Chinese eat discriminately al-
most every living creature which
comes in their way, dogs, cats, hawks,
owls, eagles and storks are regular
marketable commodities, in default of
which a dish of rats, field-inice or
snakes is not objected to. Cockroaches
and other insects and reptiles are used
for food or medicine. Their taste for
dog flesh is quite a fashion. Young
pups—plump, succulent and tender—
fetch good prices at the market stalls,
where a supply is always to be found.
A dish of puppies, prepared by a skil-
ful cook, is esteemed as a dish fit for
oe gods. At every banquet it makes
s appearance as a hash or stew.
Yes or No.
good woman,” said the learned
3 “you must give an answer in
the fewest possible words of which
Vy
when you
with the baby on
question whether,
crossing the street
‘ou are capable to the plain and simple |
were |
“Hosannah!” and amid all the
1eclaim He stopped and wept
which
shouted
joy and
remembered the sorrows
to come upon Jerusalem.
we Ie
Ambitisn did net appeal to Him.
was willing to preach to 5000 or to 200
He
or io tweniy-five or thirty, or to sit
down with one peor wretched woman
and talk to her by the well; and it did
not make any difference. What did He
care for? I‘or service—to go about
among men and make them happy.
That was what He cared for. He cared
for all sorts of men. He was equally
willing to serve the Greek or the Jew.
If He lived now, He would be as will-
ing to serve the Jew as the Christian.
He was willing to save the poor and
the rich. He was not a poor man’s
prophet. nor a rich man’s prophet. He
was willing to minister to the ignorant.
and just as willing to minister to the
wi He would talk with the peasant,
or spend an evening with one of the
great rabbis at Jerusalem. Character
or past conduct did not separate men
from His sympathy. It did not make
any difference how badly a man had
lived or how rotten was his character,
He was ready to help him. He came
into Jericho one day and the people
crowded round Him. It was a city of
priests and corrupt politicians. The
politicians were more corrupt than in
this day, and that is saying a great
deal. It was :. city of priests and poli-
ticians, and one of these latter, who
had made money by squeezing the pub-
lie, was a little man, who climbed into
a tree, because he wanted to see this
strange man Dass, This strange man
passed the priests and the orthodox
religious people und looked up at the
little man and said: “Come down; I am
going to dine with you to-day.” He
sought out the bad man because He
thought He could: do something for
him. IIe was equally ready to minis-
ter food to the hungry. healing to the
sick, comfort to the afflicted, wisdom
to the ignorant, inspiration to the de-
pressed or.suecor to the simple and the
burdened.
The only question with Him was: “Is
this man in trouble?’ What kind of
trouble? “lt does not matter what
kind of trouble, I want to help him.”
That was absolutely His only question.
And yet this man saw that the deepest
troubles of men are the troubles that
come upon them because of their
wrong doing. In His awst great ser-
mon He gave the secret of happiness
when He said: “Blessed are the pure in
heart” and “Blessed are the poor in
spirit,” etc. The secret of happiness
is what you are, not what you have.
So the thing He wanted to do was to
change men’s characters, to get them
out of sin and lead them in the paths
of virtue and truth and good will. He
wanted to lift off the burden of their
sins and make them healthy, normal,
holy men and women. To this He
gave His life. He did not do this inci-
dentally, as it chanced Him; there was
something more. He said: ‘That is
what I am here for. That is what
God put Me into the world for; it is the
mission He has given Me.” He be-
longed to a nation that had been taught
to look forward for the golden age, not
backward. They thought the good
time was yet to come. Their prophets
had told them so. They thought it was
to ‘be brought about, some said, by the
nation, by a series of prophets, or by a
single man, a conqueror. And this
mau Jesus said: “This kingdom of God
is at nand. This good time is already
here, and I am the one to bring it
about.”: The first time He preached
was at Nazareth.and then He told them
this. Then Me gathered a few disci-
ples about Him and after a year with
them He asked: “Whom do men say
that 1 am?’ They sid “There are
many different things said. Some say
a prophet; some a great teacher; some
your arm and the motor car came
down on the right side and the dog
cart was trying to .pass the motor
car, you saw the plaintiff between the
carriage and the dog cart, or the mo-
tor car and the dog cart, or whether
and when you saw him at all, and:
or either, or any two, and which of
Illustrated Bits.
whether or not the carriage, dog cart, |
them respectively, or how it was.”—!
| help every one in need.
one thing and some another.” And He
said: “But whom say ye that I'am?’
One can imagine the moment of si-
lence and hesitation and uncertainty
that followed. And then one, an impul-
; sive one, said: ‘You are the Messiah.”
He replied: *Yes, I am; that is right.”
The mission of His life was to bring
about the kingdom of God on the earth
and He said, “The way to do it is to
‘hind all
what the chara cter—to help one anoth-
er, that is the way. The Jews wanted
it another way. Queer people, these
Jews! They thought they were the
great people, which was very like the
Anglo-Saxons of to-day. They thought
there were no other people who were
religious or civilized or who had the se-
ret of great progress. They said the
Fon would come i Jerusalem, not
to Rome, and that not ‘the Romans, but
the Jews, would be dominant. But
Christ said, ‘““No, that is a mistake.
The kingdom of God iz not in Jerusa-
lem or Rome or Athens. It is iw a
spirit of universal helptfuiness.” Thag
is the kingdom of God, and he king-
dom will come whe
his fellow man out of
need, wi I
finally
elps
kind of
t be. He was
et an d put upen oath and
asked: You the Messiah??? 1
am,” He said. He claimed to be the
Mesgiah and He claimed to bring about
the kingdom of Ged by diffusing the
spirit of hope and faith and good will.
The apostles went forth and preached
—what? Not the Ten Commandments
or the Sermon on the Mount, but “This
is the Messiah. 'T} Deliverer is
come.” In the nature of the case He
could not do it alone. If it were to be
some sudden upheaval, some cata-
clysm, some march of armies, it could
be done in a single period, but if good
will, peace and universal helpfulness
were to be brought about, that would
take generatioms. That must go from
kingdom to kingdom, from city to city
and nation to nation. And so He called
a few men to carry the message—first
twelve, then seventy. Then He died.
Then, after His resurrection, He sent
others. He sent them in the spirit of
good will and helpfulness, to heal the
sick, cleanse the leper and restore com-
fort to the sorrowing. To pe to
everybody, rich, poor, wise, ignorant,
to the Jew and tlie Gentile,
There was something more. - In ali
ages men have believed in some great
occult power lying ‘back of the phe-
nomena of nature. The Jews thought
there was one at God who inexor-
ably demanded righteousness of His
people, and Jesus said, “God is such a
one as I am, actuated by the same
spirit. In My life and teachings I am
interpreting this great Infinite Power,
this just, wise God, this eternal Infinite
Presence.” And He illustrated His
meaning by the parable of the king
whose subjects rebelled against him;
by the parable of the lost sheep and
the parable of the prodigal son. “That
is the kind of Father that God is.” said
Jesus.
There is still more in Christ's mes-
sage. In all ages men have been try-
ing to get to this unknown God. They
have said: ‘““We have done wrong, we
have aroused the wrath of this God.
He is right to be ang with us. How
shall we appease His anger? .We will
offer sacrifices.” It is difficult in this
twentieth century to realize what wor-
ship was twenty centuries ago. Pie-
ture the temple, the altar, the white-
robed priests. All around in the outer
court the cooing of doves, the bleating
of sheep, and within, by this altar, a
butcher's shop, a shambles. Priests
cutting the throats of lambs and cattle
and the blood flowing in great rivers
out from under the altar. Why? Be-
cause these people thought God had a
right to be angry—and they were right.
He had a right to be angry—and they
thought He was angry—and they were
half right in that—and they thought
the way to peace was by sacrifice, and
they were wrong in that. Jesus never
offered a sacrifice, so rar as we know,
or told anybody else to offer sacrifice.
This world is God's reformatory and
what He has done is this: His Marshal
has come for you and me. Has He
come in power, with greatness of riches
or wonderful display ' or intellectual
wisdom? No. Come how? In sympa-
thy, in tenderness, in love, in puriry
and truth and righteousness. We can
see no way to happiness save by en-
dow:ing with truth and purity and
righteousness. He has come to us—to
you and me.
i ‘He says,
thing.” You say:
*Neither had 1.”
“Neither had 1.”
“You can @o the same
+1 h1ave no power.”
“J have not wealth.”
“I was not an eccie-
siastie.” “Neither was 1.” ‘Come to
Me: get My spirit; live as I lived; be
willing to lay down ycur life for others,
as I was for you.”
I have tried this morning to get be-
definitions, all fal state-
ments, not because I think they are
bad. but because I am sure the spirit
of Christ transcends. all definitions and
creedal statements. Christianity! What
is it? It is the new doctrine of God.
It is the new faith in God. It is the
faith of God, who is in His world as
He was in Jesus Christ, comforting the
sorrowing, helping the tempted, in-
structing the ignorant. It is the new
hope, the hope of the kingdom of God
that is coming. There is coming the
time when men will give te their fel-
low men fair, honest, generous meas-
ures and will “do unto others as they
would be done unto.” That is right-
cousness. There is coming a time when
there will be peace in every heart be-
cause it is at harmony with itself, and
peace in the whole world between man
and man, nation and nation. And it is
a new hope that Christianity brings
when it says: “Now. you can work for
that because you are working in the
spirit of the Eternal, ard it is the spirit
of good will, of service, of sacrifice, of
laying down our lives for other: as He
laid down His life for us.”
Christianity! What is it? It is that
“God so loved the world that'He gave
His only begotten Son, that whosoever
believeth in Him might not perish, but
have everlasting life.” That is'the the-
ology of Christianity. “The Kingdom
of God is at hand.” 'That is the hope of
Christianity. “A new commandment
zive I unto you: that ye love one anoth-
as I have loved you.” ‘That is the
Igw of Christianity.
There God Is.
and trouble
It is gener-
and throw
Love Is,
that disturb
us seldom come from God.
ally best to put them away,
ourself, with increased trust in Him
zag mistrust of salf, at His feet. And
swwer forget, amid whatever may be-
fall Fou-—qr; yness, coldness, desolation
and disappointment, consciousness of
many faults, and of great weakness,
and want of faith—that where love is,
there God is sure to be. He never yet
has suffered any soul to fall wholly
frem Him which, amid all its frailities
and falls, clings to Him in 'ove.—H. L.
Sidney Lear.
God’s Errands,
Difficulties are Geod’s errands, and
when we are sent upon them we should
No matfer
esteem it a proof of God's confidence.—
Beecher,
WHO DAT KNOCK?
Fre dat knock at de cabin do’?
Age !'—Well, Ses pass on.
) | et no time to fool with you—
I got to hoe my caw.
1 reckon dere's been some mistake —
Dat’s des whut hit shorely be,
Caze I’se too spry * you to come
A-huntin’ ‘roun” fo" me.
An’ who dat you got wid you dere?
OF Rheumatics,
You'll haf to 'scuse me, e
Dis here's my busy d
~—FEloise I.ee Sherman, in
ou please—
New York Times.
Bella
Stella—Silence gives consent.
—Yes, but the trouble is that it won't
pop the question.—Brooklyn Life.
“That big dog you gav us actually
does police duty at our house.”
“Yes. He spends most of his time in
the kitchen with the cook.”—Detroit
Free Press.
Wigg—So the editor said Scribbler's
brand of humor was too delicate, eh?
Wagg—Well, that wasn’t exactly the
word. He said it was sickly.—Phila-
delphia Record.
Harduppe—If you will let me have a
fiver I shall be everlastingly indebted
to you. Miserleigh—Yes, that's why I
must. decline to let you have
Town and Country.
“I made my first dollar picking up
chips,” said the self-made man. “And
who staked you to the stack you
started on?” was the interviewer's ab-
sentminded question.—Cleveland Lead-
er.
Defeated Conservative candidate
dressing supportersj—There is a s
ing, “Give a man enough rope and he
will hang himself.” This the
cal party will do; then it
our turn!—Punch.
Wigg—I know a man
bed in broad & dayl
Wagg—That was very
Wigg—Why, is robhery 80 S
there? Wagg— ‘No, but broad day
is.—Philadelphia Record.
“Young man,
it.—
3
adg-
and will He
who was rob-
how do you intend
support my daughter if you marry
her?”.. “By working, sir.’ “Yes, ves,
I understand all that; but what I
want to know is whom you are going
to work.”—Baltimore American.
Elderly Man (greeting former ac-
quaintance)—I remember your face
perfectly, miss, but your name has es-
caped me. The Young Woman—I don’t
wonder. It escaped me three years
ago. I am married now.—Chicago Tri-
bune.
“So you turned down that impecu-
nious nobleman?” interrogated the in-
quisitive girl friend. “Was he shy
when he proposed?” ‘Yes; shy about
two millions,” replied the daughter of
the multimillionaire brewer.—Chicago
Daily News.
Newberry—Is Sanford of an
mistic temperament? Baldwin—1}
shquld say he was. I have known him
to go into a restaurant without a cent
in his pocket, order a dozen oysters
and feel satisfied that he could pay his
bill with a pearl.—Life.
. “This Government does not pay
anything like the salaries that foreign
officials receive.” “No,” answered the
citizen who refuses to be worried.
“We don’t take needless chances in a
m-n’s being so much occupied in in-
vesting his money that he forgets
about his patriotic duties.”—Washing-
ton Star.
“Yes,” said D’Auber, the artist who
had been commissioned to paint the
portrait of Mrs. Nuritch, “water colors
may be easily rubbed out, but
“All right, then,” interrupted Nuritch,
“you can paint the head and neck in
oil and the dress in water color. Then
it'll be easy to make it up-to-date
every time the style changes.”—Phila-
delphia Press.
opti-
Town of 4,000 in a Week.
One day a mountain valley, with
20 inhabitants; in a week a pulsating
mining camp of 4,000 people—that is
the history of @lanhattan, 80 miles
northeast of Goldfield, Nev. A low
estimate places the exodus to the new
fields from Goldfield alone at 2,000
persons. Two hundred dollars a day
has been bid for automobiles by those
anxious to reach the camp in a hurry.
Hundreds of teams line the two roads
to the latest camp.
Life at the new camp is strenuous.
There is no law. Lots have jumped
in price from $25 to $3,500. Meats
are very high. A bath in a round tin
sold the other day for $3. Hotels are
making hundreds of dollars a day, and
at night space is sold on the floors for
sleeping room.—Chicago News.
Road Dangers for Automobiles.
A French automobilist gives the fol-
lowing interesting statistics of dan-
gers in the road gathered in the course
of 1,000 miles’ travel on the public
reads.
Vehicles abandoned by their driv-
ers, 75; drivers who refused to move
out of the way, 51; drivers asleep on
their vehicles, 8; drivers on the wrong
side of the road, 35; drivers not hold-
ing the reins, 12; vehicles without lan-
terns, 31; drivers resting their horses
in the middle of the road and at dan-
gerous turnings, 2; drivers walking
behind their vehicles, 18; several
vehicles fastened together, and hav-
ing only oné lantern, 10; saddle horses
left standing, 13; wandering dogs
which had to be avoided, 85.—Motor
World.
“S07
CEE (a
va
Af
Ge
ia.
tu
Bl
bu
to1
tio
Me
not
low
ma
Ha
Jor
del
Ha
anc
mo:
tio
end
ma!
for
ava
Ang
clas
sub
the
cas
res]
scal
tub
ed s
T
Wir
has
dre
Fi
it w
for
new
can
was
1.03
hos:
fire.
T
Whe
sidi
ente
Son
thro
Alle
both
Wal
TI
OCCU
Com
pan;
fire,
pers