}
i
4
2
{
Queer Luck of
By JOSEPH
*OOR Abe Dodge!”
x That's what they called
him, though he was not any
poorer than other folks—
not so poor as some. How
~ could he be poor, work as
he did and steady as he was? Worth
a whole grist of such bait as his
brother Ephe Dodge, and yet they
never called Ephe poor, whatever
Worse name they might call him. When
Ephe was off at a show in the village
Abe was following the plow, driving a
straight furrow, though you would not
have thought it to see the way his nose
pointed.
In winter, when Ephe was taking
the girls to singing school or spelling
bee or some other foolishness—out till
after 9 o'clock at night, like as not—
Abe was hanging over the fire, hold-
ing a book so the light would shine,
first on one page and then on the other,
and he turning the book, and reading
first with one eye and then with the
other.
There, the murder’s out. Abe couldn't
read with both eyes at once. If Abe
looked straight ahead he couldn't see
the furrow—nor anything else, for that
matter. His best friend couldn't say
but what Abe Dodge was the cross-
eyedest cuss that ever was. Why, if
You wanted to see Abe, you'd stand in
front of him, but if you wanted Abe
to see you, you'd Lave to stand behind
him, or pretty near it. Homely? Well,
if you mean downright “humbly,”
that’s what he was.
When one eye was in use the other
was out of sight, all except the white
of it. The girls used to say he had to
wake up in the night to rest his face,
it was so “humbly.” In school you
ought to have seen him look at his
copybook. He had to cant his head
clear over and cock his chin up till it
pointed out of the window and down
the road. You'd really ought to have
seen him; you'd have died. Head of
his class, too, right along; just as near
to the head as Ephe was to the foot;
and that’s saying a good deal. But to
see him at his desk. He looked for all
the world like a week cld chicken peek-
in’ at a tumblebug. And him a grown
man, too, for he stayed to school win-
ters so long as there was anything
more the teacher could teach him. You
see, there wasn’t anything to draw him
away, no girl would look at him—
lucky, too, seein’ the way he looked.
Well, one term there was a new
teacher come—regular high-up girl,
down from Chicago. As bad luck
would have it, Abe wasn’t at school the
first week—hadn’t got through his fall
work. So she got to know all the
scholars, and they was awful tickled
with her—everybody always was that
knowed her. The first day she came in
and saw Abe at his desk. she thought
he was squintin’ for fun, and she up
and laughed right out. Some of the
scholars laughed, too, at first; but most
of ’em, to do ‘em justice, was a leetle
took back; young as they was, and
cruel by nature. (Young folks is most
usually cruel—don’t seem to know no
better.)
Well, right in the middle of the hush,
Abe gathered up his books and upped
and walked outdoors, lookin’ right
ahead of him, and consequently seein’
the handsome young teacher unbe-
known to her.
She was the worst cut up you ever
did see; but what could she do or say?
Go and tell him she thought he was
makin’ up a face for fun? The girls
do say that come noon-spell, when she
found out about it, she cried—just fair-
ly cried. Then she tried to be awful
nice to Abe's ornery brother, Ephe, and
Ephe, he was tickled most to death;
but that didn’t do Abe any good—Ephe
was just ornery enough to take care
that Abe shouldn't get any comfort
out of it. They do say she sent mes-
sages to Abe, and Ephe never delivered
"em, or else twisted ‘em S80 as to make
things worse and worse, Mebbe so,
mebbe not—Ephe was ornery enough
for it.
’Course the schoolma’am she was
boardin’ round, and pretty soon it come
time to go to ol’ man Dodge's and she
went; but no Abe could she ever see,
He kept away, and as to meals, he
never set by, but took a bite off by
himself when he could get a chance.
(‘Course his mother favored him, being
be was so cussed unlucky.) Then when
the folks was all to bed, he'd come in
and poke up the fire and peep into his
book, but first one side and then the
other, same as ever.
Now what does schoolma’am do but
come down one night when she thought
be was abed and asleep, and catch him
unawares. Abe knowed it was her,
quick as he heard the rustle of her
dress, but there wasn’t no help for it,
$0 he just turned his head away and
covered Lis cross-eyes with his hands
and she pitched in. What she said I
don’t know, but Abe never said a word;
only told her he didn’t blame her, not
a mite; he knew she couldn’t help it—
no move than he could. Then she asked
him to come back to school, and he
answered to please excuse him. After
a bit she asked him if he wouldn’t come
back to oblige her, and he said he cal-
culated he was obligin’ her more by
stayin’ away.
Well, come to that, she didn’t know
what to do, so, womanlike, she upped
The Surgeon’s Miracle.
a Homely Man.
KIRKLAND.
fries
© _.cas he said he'd come back, and they
shook hands on it.
Well, Abe kept his word and took up
schoolin’ as if nothing had happened;
and such schoolin’ as there was that
winter. I don’t believe any regular
academy had more learnin’ and teachin’
that winter than that district school
did. Seemed as if all the scholars had
turned over a new leaf. Even wild,
ornery, no account Ephe Dodge couldn’t
help but get ahead some—but then he
was crazy to get the schoolma’am;
and she never paid no attention to him,
just went with Abe.
Abe was teachin’ her mathematics,
seeing that was the one thing where
he knowed more than she did—outside
of the farming. Folks used to say
that if Ephe had Abe’s head, or Abe
had Epe’s face, the schoolma’am would
have half of the Dodge farm whenever
ol’ man Dodge got through with it; but
neither of them did have what the
other had, and so there it was, you
see.
Well, you've heard of Squire Caton;
Judge Caton, they call him, since he
got to be judge of the Supreme Court—
and Chief Justice at that. Well, he
had a farm down there not far from
Fox River, and when he was there he
was a plain farmer like the rest of us,
though up in Chicago he was a high-up
lawyer, leader of the bar. Now it so
happened that a young doctor named
Brainard—Daniel Brainard—had just
come to Chicago and was startin’ in,
and Squrie Caton was helpin’ him,
gave him desk room in his office and
made him known to the folks—Kinzies
and Butterflies and Ogdens and Hamil-
tons and Arnolds and all of these folks
—about all there was in Chicago in
those days.
Brainard had been in Paris, France,
and Paris, Illinois, you understand, and
knew all the doctorin’ there was to
know then. Well, come spring, Squire
Caton had Doc Brainard down to visit
him, and they shot #ucks and geese
and prairie chickens and some wild tur-
keys—and deer, too. Game was just
swarming at that time. All the while
Caton was doin’ what law business
there was to do, and Brainard thought
he ought to be doin’ some doctorin’ to
keep his hand in, so he asked Caton if
there wasn’t any cases he could take
up—surgery cases especially he hank-
ered after, seein’ he had more carvin’
tools than you could shake a stick at.
He asked him particularly if there
wasn’t anybody he could treat for
“strabismus.”
The squire hadn’t heard of anybody
dying of that complaint; but when the
doctor explained that strabismus was
French for cross-eyes, he naturally
thought of poor Abe Dodge, and the
young doctor was right up on his ear.
He smelled the battle afar off; and
‘most before you could say Jack Robin-
son the squire and the doctor were on
horseback and down to the Dodge
farm, tool chest and all.
Well, it so happened that nobody was
at home but Abe and Ephe, and it
didn’t take but a few words before
Abe was ready to set right down, then
and there, and let anybody do anything
he was a mind to with his unfortunate
eyes. No, he wouldn't wait until the
old folks come home; he didn’t want to
ask no advice; he wasn’t afraid of
pain, nor of what anybody could do te
his eyes—couldn’t be made any worse
than they were, whatever you did to
em. Take ’em out and boil em and
put em: back if you had a mind to, only
go to work. He knew he was of age,
and he guessed he was master of his
own eyes—such as they were,
Well, there wasn’t nothing else to do
but go ahead. The doctor opened up
his killing tools and tried to keep Abe
from seeing them; but Abe he just
come right over and peeked at ‘em,
handled ‘em and called ’em “splendid”
—and so they were, barrin’ havin’ them
used on your flesh and blood and bones,
Then they got some: clothes and a
basin, and one thing and another, and
set Abe right down in a chair. (No
such thing as chloroform in those days,
you'll remember.) Squire Caton was to
hold an imstrument that spread the
eyelids wide open, while Ephe was to
hold Abe’s head steady. First touch of
the lancet, the first spurt of blood, and
what do you think? That ornery Ephe
wilted and fell flat on the floor behind
the chair.
“Squire,” said Brainard, “step around
and hold his head.”
“I can hold my own head,” says Abe,
as steady as you please. But Squire
Caton he straddled over Ephe and held
his head between his arms, and the two
handles of the eye-spreader with his
hands.
It was all over in half a minute, and
then Abe, he leaned forward and shook
the blood off his eyelashes, and locked
straight out of that eye for the first
time since he was born. And the first
words he said were:
“Thank the Lord. She’s mine.”
About that time Ephe he crawled out
doors, sick as a dog, and Abe spoke up,
says he:
“Now for the other, eye, doctor.”
“Oh,” says the doctor, “we'd better
take another day for that.”
“All right,” says Abe; “if your hands
are tired of cuttin’, you can make an-
other job of it. My face ain’t tired of
bein’ cut, I can tell you.”
and cried; and then she said he hurt |
der feelings. And the upshoot of it |
i
“Well, if you're game, I am.”
So, if you'll believe me, they just set
to work and operated on the other eye,
Abe holding his own head, as he said
he would, and the Squire holding the
spreader. And when it was all done
the doctor was for puttin’ a bandage
on to keep things quiet till the wounds
all healed up; but Abe just begged for
one sight of himself, and he stood up
and walked over to the clocks and
looked in the glass, and says he:
“So that’s the way I lcok, is it?
Shouldn’t have known my own face—
never saw it before. How long must I
keep the bandage on, doctor?”
“Ob, if the eyes ain’t very sore when
you wake up in the morning you can
take it off, if you'll be careful.”
“Wake up. Do-you suppose I can
sleep when such a blessing has fallen
on me? I'll lay still, but if I forget it,
or you, for one minute this night, I'll
be so ashamed of myself that it'll
wake me right up.”
Then the doctor bound up his eyes
and the poor lad said “Thank God”
two or three times, and they could see
the tears running down his cheeks from
under the cloth. Lord! It was just as
pitiful as a broken-winged bird. -
How about the girl? Well, it was
all right for Abe—and all wrong for
Ephe—all wrong for Ephe. But that’s
all past and gone—all past and gone.
Folks come for miles and miles to see
cross-eyed Abe with his eyes as
straight as a loon’s leg. Doctor Brain-
ard was a great man forever after in
those parts. Everywhere else, too, by
what I heard.
When the doctor and the Squire came
to go, Abe spoke up, blindfolded as he
was and says he:
“Doe, how much do you charge a
feller for savin’ his life—makin’ a man
out of a poor wretch—doin’ what he
never thought could be done but by
dyin’ and goin’ to kingdom come?”
“Oh,” said Doc Brainard, says he,
“that ain’t what we look to as pay
practice. You didn’t call me in; I came
of myself, as though it was what we
call a clinic. If all goes well, and if
You happen to have a barrel of apples
to spare, you just send them up to
Squire Caton’s Louse in Chicago, and
I'll call over and help eat ‘em.”
What did Abe say to that? Why,
sir, he never said a word; but they do
say the tears started out again, out
from under the bandage and down his
cheeks. But then Abe he had a five-
year-old pet mare he'd raised from a
colt—pretty as a picture, kind as a
kitten, and fast as split lightning; and
next time Doc came down, Abe he just
slipped out to the barn and brought
the mare round and hitched her to the
gate-post, and when Doc came to be
goin’ says Abe:
“Don’t forget your nag, doctor; she’s
hitched to the gate.”
Well, sir, even then Abe had the
hardest kind of a time to get Doc
Brainard to take that mare; and when
he did ride off, leading her, it wasn’t
half an hour before back she came,
lickety-split. Doc said she broke away
from him and put for home, but I al-
ways suspected he didn’t have no use
for a hoss he couldn't sell nor hire out,
and couldn't afford to keep in the
village—that was what -Chicago was
then. But come along toward fall Abe
he took her right up to town, and then
the doctor's practice had growed so
much that he was pretty glad to have
her, and Abe was glad to have him
have her, seein’ all that had come to
him through havin’ eyes like other
folks—that’s the schoolma’am, I mean.
How did the schoolma’am take it?
Well, it was this way. After the cut-
tin’ Abe didn’t show up for a few
days, till the inflammation got down,
and he’d had some practice handlin’
his eyes, so io speak. He just kept
himself to himself, enjoying himself.
He'd go round doin’ the chores, singin’
So you could hear him a mile. He was
always great on singin’, Abe was,
though ashamed to go to singin’ school
with the rest. Then when the poor boy
began to feel like other folks he went
right over to where the schoolma’am
happened to be boardin’ round, and
walked right up to her and took her
by both hands and looked her straight
in the face and said:
“Do you know me?”
Well, si® kind of smiled and blushed,
and then the corners of her mouth
pulled down, and she pulled one hand
away, and—if you believe me—that was
the third time that girl cried that sea-
son, to my certain knowledge— and all
for nothin’ either time.
What did she say? Why, she just
said she'd have to begin all over again
to get acquainted with Abe. But
Ephe’s nose was out of joint, and Ephe
knowed it as well as anybody, Ephe
did. It was Abe’s eyes to Ephe’s nose.
Married? Oh, yes, of coursé: and
lived on the farm as long as the old
folks lived, and afterward, too; Ephe
staying right along, like the fool al-
ways had been. That feller never did
have as much sense as a last year’s
bird's nest.
Alive yet? Abe? Well, no. Might
have been if it hadn’t been for Shiloh.
When the war broke out Abe thought
he'd ought to go, old as he was, so he
went into the Sixth. Maybe you've
seen a book written about the captain
of Company K of the Sixth. It was
Company K he went into—him and
Ephe. And he was killed at Shiloh—
Just as it always seems to happen.
He got killed and his worthless brother
come home. Folks thought Ephe would
have liked to marry the widow, but
Lord, she never had no such an idea.
Such bait as he was compared to his
brother. She never chirped up, to
speak of, and now she's dead, too, and
Ephe he just toddles round, taking
care of the children—kind of a dry
nurse: that’s about all he ever was
good for, anyhow.
My name? OH, my name’s Ephraim
—Ephe they call me, for short; Ephe
Dodge. Abe was my brother.—New
York News.
Lord Mount Edscombe is among thé
most skillful landscape gardeners im
FOR HOARSENESS.
If you are Lkoarse, lemon . juice
Squeezed on to soft sugar till it is like
a syrup, and a few drops of glycerine
added, relieves the hoarseness at once.
TAKING CORK OUT OF A BOTTLE,
Let both bottle and cork dry thor-
oughly, for a dry cork is smaller than
a damp one. Take a piece of fine,
strong twine, make a loop of it by hold-
ing the two ends, and then put the
loop into the bottle, and move the
bottle about tiil you get the string un-
der the centre of the cork at the neck
of the bottle. Then give a careful pull
and the cork will come out.
SOAP DESTROYS VARNISH,
The care of furniture woods is an ex-
ceedingly interesting part of the intelli-
genthousekeeper’s duty. The daily light
dusting must supplement the weekly rub-
bing if the “bloom” in this instance
not desirable is to be kept away. As a
rule, the use of oily restoratives is to
be deprecated. Unless applied by a
tireless arm, and thoroughly rubbed in
and thereafter the piece of furniture
kept in perfect polish by a daily rub-
bing, the oil is sure to form a crust
sooner or later, which is gummy to the
touch and not pleasant to the eye. For
this reason new furniture should be
kept as long as possible without the
application of such restoratives. Fur-
niture which has been finished with
shellac or varnish, whether in glossy
or dull finish, should never be cleaned
with soap or water. Soap is made to
cut all oily substances, and in the per-
formance of the service for which it
is made it eats the oil out of the
waxed, oiled or shellaced surface it
touches and destroys them.
PICTURE FRAMING.
How to frame a picture offers a per-
plexing problem to many, who, having
no confidence in their own taste or
judgment, hand it over to the profes-
sional framer. As a rule, if he under-
stands his business, ‘he will put a cor-
rect frame on the picture, especialy if
it be an oil painting, as those are
framed similarly. It is when there is
a water color, an etching or a carbon
print, that anxiety is felt to have
a frame to correspond to the predom-
inating color, and be in complete har-
mony with it, says the Household
Ledger.
Conditions vary su frequently that it
is impossible to give any hard and fast
rule by which to be universally guided;
but there is one very definite maxim
that it is imperative to observe—and
it is, that the frame must be subser-
vient to the picture and not the cone
spicuous feature. If the frame is more
noticeable than the picture, depend up-
on it, it is badly framed. The cost does
not enter into consideration. A water
color should have a mat—the width de-
pending on its size; a picture of the av-
erage small size requiring a mat of
from two to three inches wide. The
color depends on the picture, that is,
its color scheme. In some pictures, a
gold mat will prove an advantage. If
the picture is delicate in tone a white
mat looks well, and a dark mat, either
green or gray, will only be suitable
where a good deal of color, dark rich,
glowing colors are in the picture. Next
to gold frames are the various woods,
either natural or imitated, with or
without polish, and also either with or
without gold ornaments. These come
in every conceivable tint, and the color
employed should harmonize with and
be a trifle lower in tone than the pic-
ture, so as to accentuate the color
scheme, whatever it may be.
The popular posters seem to require
special treatment in framing. They
should be framed close up, and if the
poster is dark and a strong piece of
work, dull black wood is very effective,
The hunting scenes, full of gay and
brilliant color, should also have dark
wood bands. A narrow line of gold
next the picture often proves a wel-
come addition to relieve the dullness,
or rather to unite the sombre tone of
the frame with the color of the picture,
% RECIPEST |
Boiled Tripe—Boil tripe until tender;
make it as dry as possible by using
towel; cut in pieces, lay them in fine
bread crumbs, then in melted butter
or oil and again lay in crumbs; place
on a greased broiler, exposing the
smooth of the tripe first to the heat;
broil for five minutes; serve honeycomb
side up; spread with butter and sea-
son.
Gluten Bread—Scald one pint of
milk; add one cup of boiling water,
two teaspoonfuls of butter and one
level teaspoon of salt; let this cool and
add one well beaten egg, one-third of
a yeast cake, and gluten to make a soft
dough; knead thoroughly twenty min-
utes; let rise six hours; put into
greased pans; let rise two hours, or
until double in bulk and bake one hour
in a moderate oven. -
Finnan Haddock—Take a salted had-
dock, remove the meat, pound and pass
through a wire sieve. Pour a cup of
fish stock into a saucepan, melt in it
one ounce of butter, add half a cup of
bread crumbs soaked in milk and
pressed through a sieve, and thicken
with corn flour. Mix in the pounded
fish, season and add gradually the
beaten yolks of three fresh eggs and
then the whites stifily beaten. Bake
England,
or steam in a mold.
| gone up to thirty-one.
1
PRUNING TREES.
rbout by poor living.
transplanted tree is safer for
strong as well as weak, but some
aot be shortened in, but nearly th
out and the strong ones left.
possible to pound the earth too
all risks in transplanting.
not die.
clay loams are good. Many old
cellent peach orchards when well
Many who have tried this plan
richer soil for peaches.
shallow. There are some who
grass in peach orchards, but I
this is a great mistake. There
take care of you.
THINNING APPLES,
operation
of New York, it is not profitable
vestigations in thinning by the
sons in a commercial orchard.
size, in color and in quality,
marked, whenever fair to heavy
that unless a higher price is se
tin. Any
ran Cultivator,
A fruit evaporator is
‘our feet square on the ground.
Che trays are made of galva
icreening stretched on a frame
dts when slid in on the cleats. A
to the top on the outside.
easily be done by putting fuel in
late and closing all dampers,
peaches can be dried in a day
night.
on the stove for each tray of fru
bleach apples.
apples and surplus peaches.
too. They make good vinegar.
this is a good way to make you
money.—Mrs. Susie Holland. in
Agricultural Epitomist.
HORTICULTURAL NOTES
chard.
to fruit crops. .
Blighted leaves and branches on
trees should be cut off and burned
Most effective pruning is done i
One advantage in pruning durin
summer is that the wounds hea]
quickly.
Dead branches are often the meg
conveying decay to an othe
healthy trunk.
Never prune a tree unless ther
good® reason why a limb or a bj
should be taken off.
In pruning roses cutting back ¢
produces, as a rale, fewer blos
out of a finer quality.
In orchard “planting, select w
view to good bearing, good qu
good marketing and good keeping
Years 1,391,076 TiS
In thirty
1890 the percentage of women wa
than ten, but since that time i
Numbers of trees with good 1,
and planted. die after removal s¥
from a weakened constitution bret
It has als
been understood that in this coum
4
pruned, but the pruning generally-
8i ing i bran, 4
sisted of shortening in all the br | only one language.
STOW intai t si ;
2rowers maintain that the tree 1 | an awful lot of that.”
out, all the weaker branches beint
It it
about a transplanted tree, nor to
The anil
never be so perfected that somel
THE PEACH ORCHARD.
The peach does best in soil ths
inclined to be sandy, but many oe
that are thought to be worn mak-
ared and crops of clover or pease
grown on the land and plowed qa.
old land like it better than newd
The tillage should be frequentd
tree which will show the beneficig-
fects of good tillage more quickly.d
the opposite of neglect than the pa.
Select the largest trees of one ys
growth from the bud, plant and e
good care of them and they will p
Thinning apples may be a profile
under some ' circumstas,
out as fruit is ordinarily market
the commercial apple growing seas
York Agricultural Experiment Stn
(Geneva) were carried on for fouri-
The.
sults, in improvement of the fruin
were borne on the trees, but the q-
tity of fruit was usually lesseneso
for the improvement in quality thx-
sense of the operation is not red.
Full details of these tests are givin
Bulletin No. 239 of the &itation, wh
any apple grower or other person-
rerested may secure without cosy
sending his name and address tae
director, with a request for this te-
available station: bulin
may be obtained in this way.—Ari-
A CHEAP FRUIT EVAPORAT.
somehg
which should be on every farm.lo
nake one have the roof slant at aut
tight feet tall at the highest. lid
leats inside for the trays to slid.
ender the trays, with the pipe rumg
A dooA,
above is large enough to put trayn;
B, small door below to feed stove.
tompletes this cheap evaporator If
gept running night and day, whickan
ove
evaporators full of apples and o1 of
Put a tablespoonful of suhur
The boys and gir of
the farm can run it, and save theull
Drjthe
pealings of the apples, and sell tem,
(rls,
Potash fertilizers are of special ilue
early stages of the orchard’s grow.
have come to this country. Prigr
ee
it
a
8
l=
h
ir
1k
io
Ie
Ww
e
[OS]
ed
ut
ed
at
ve
1s
wa
ind
to
pin
the
Rolling ground is the best for a or-
ruit
Man gets his dinner a la carte,
s of
vise
I
Side of
Life.
THE DIFFERENCE.
We're not so much above the brutes,
So what's the use of braggin’?
gs i la waggin’. CH
Dogs get thei tp. timore American.
}
FLUENT IN ENGLISH. :
Ethel—“It is too bad that I know
Edgar—“Well, Ethel, you talk suck
~~ CONVENTIONAL, ANYHOW.
Wigwag—“And does the story end
happily ?? ;
Henpeckke—“No; they get married
in the last chapter.”—Philadelphia Rec-
ord. a
KNEW HIM, :
Bunker—*“Old man, can you lend me
a hundred until next Thursday ?’
Hill—“I'm sorry, old man, but I've
got to meet a note next Friday.”—Des«
troit Free Press. 3
HOW HE IS KNOWN.
Wife—“Before marriage a man ig
known by the company he keeps.” i
Husband—‘“And after?”
Wife — “By the clothes his wife
wears.””—Town Topics.
HUMANITY.
Sergeant—‘“What did you arrest this
man for?”
Officer Keegan—“For his own safety,
sergeant. He was too drunk to protect
himself and insisted on going home!”—
Puck.
IMPARTIALITY.
Dashaway—*“I tell you, old man, that
the first kiss I got from Miss Pinkerly
was delicious.”
Cleverton — “Don’t say a word; I
know all about it. I was there after
you left.”
A DIFFICULT 'MIX.
“Horace says, ‘Mingle a little folly
with your wisdom.’ ”’
“Yes; that’s easy enough. But it’s
another matter when it comes to ming«
ling a little wisdom with your folly.”—
Chicago Record-Herald,
BUSY MAN.
Pilcher—“What in time do you pa-
tronize the quick lunch for? You have
plenty of time at your disposal.”
Gastrie—“I know, but it takes me all
the time I have to digest one of those
quick lunches.”—Boston Trauscript. of
HE KNEW.
Coyne—“A dog is a man’s best frieni
because he never forsakes him.”
Harduppe — “That's right. A map
can’t borrow money from a dog.”
LITTLE OUTSIDE HELP.
“I understand that politician is &
self-made man.”
“He is, entirely—except for a couple
of coats of whitewash which he has re.
ceived from investigating committees.”
—Syracuse Herald.
EASILY EXPLAINED.
Mrs. Jobkins—“The last time Mrs.
Flusher called here she wore a beauti-
ful new sealskin sack, and I haven't
seen her with it since.”
Mr. Jobkins—“Possibly it was only
sent upon approval.” — Detroit Free
Press.
HIS PREFERENCE.
“Don’t you know that you could buy
a fine house with what you spend in
luxuries 7’
“Yes,” answered the easy.going man,
“but my tastes aren’t so luxurious as
to make me want a fine house.’—
Washington Star.
the VF
AFTER THE WEDDING.
Ie He—“It certainly was a pretty wed
ding, and everything was so nicely ard
ranged.”
She—“That’s just what I think; ang
the music was especially appropriate.”
He—"I don’t remember. What did
is a | they play ??
nch She—*“The Last Hope.”—Lippincett’s
Magazine.
sely TE ———
HIS, HELPFUL WOMAN.
“I really don’t see how the bachelors
h a | get along without a loving helpmate,”
lity, | began Mrs. Benedick.
“Yes, a woman can help a man in so
many ways,” replied her friend.
ans
“Exactly. Now there’s my Henry;
to | swhenever he sits down to mend a tear
less
in his coat or sew on a button he al-
|
|
has ways has me to thread his needle for
\
1
bim.”—Philadelphia Ledger.
Ghe F: anny’ 2
VERITA
© Of cours:
. {would vent
tirely novel,
. comes the
entirely wo
as actual fa
ground for
for hand. ba
= terly medal
noticad, an
coat of cha
beautifully
cate is its
is not bur
and its eff
quite dazz
been made
i practical p
|| A BUS
i Few peo]
i mote Irish
I deen, who
years ago ¢
a garden |
¢ vited were
t sible costu
Irish mar
has many
i her philan
i the better
i says Won
§ too, speak
form, and
f en’s assoc
' a lover of
i touch of
: peals to tb
| contact,
. THE VO
Now the
including
pccupatiorn
extremely
women wl
much edu
gome won
educated
. Bays Hary
which he:
complishn
which we
than lear:
character
not overe
tion of be
You mas
| books an
ciety;” yo
duly thin
may misc
various
her to thi
jects that
women, |
ucated be
fied witl
sant to
who seel
ture’s da
cated.
The fr
doesn’t k
develope
the deve!
—and, ed
her abili
place is
knowled:
find a fie
! coop
Nothin
detrimen
of mind
ienced
with the
' going to
with her
band — ¢
ideas. I
are con
they are
husband
. it comes
they find
a contra
A won
rimonial
aging hi
out of t
less tha
home, 3
mistress
to set he
to insis
honor h
are man
that the
fling in!
el sider is
4g bands, ¢
travaga
themsel
ter of £
ing ther
often ct
if his v
her wis.
be car
thinks f
Don’t
your hi
forth Ww
Deferer
} pil whic
life run
mind th