Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, April 25, 1901, Image 3

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    WOMEN AND SECRETS
A HATEFUL OLD TRADITION THAT
HAS STARVED TO DEATH.
Heitlly Women \ r»- It 11 r«le«l u» Ihf
Nulurul Kepo*llorie» iif Secret*.
'i In- Mullirr'a ami tbe Slater'* I'urt*
A Little Advice.
Can a woman keep a secret? There is
a doubt iu the miuds of the many that
she can.
As a general rule, it is agreed that a
man can. Why an exception of the
trustworthiness of women in this direc
tion has come to be commonly believed
is a bit puzzling when one sets one
self to the task of finding out the reason
that gave rise to the belief.
That the belief is so common leads one
to think that the unwisdom of selecting
a woman fur a confidante has been prov
ed so many times it has been evident to
even the most casual observer, when, a 9
a matter of fact, the most loyal of se
cret keepers the world has ever known
have been women. There is the wife or
mother or sister who down in the bottom
of her heard holds sacred many a trust
reposed in her.
But what of the woman friend? Oh,
perhaps you, like many a one of us,
make the mistake of bestowing your con
fidence too lightly. Maybe you have so
longed to confide something in some one
that it was not a matter of selection, but
rather of accident, that Jennie or Clara
wus asked to lend a ready ear to what
you had to say. Of course I will grant
you, even though these were the circum
stances, Jennie or Clara should have
been worthy the trust you reposed in
thom; but, Laving really little or no per
sonal interest in you, they only thought it
a small matter when they repeated what
you had told them. And, maybe, too,
when the story was retold by them it
was only because they sympathized with
you and wanted another to do the sums.
But since it is commonly believed,
however unjustly, that women are very
lax as secret keepers it rests with women
themselves to prove that such an asser
tion is merely a hateful old tradition that
has long ago died out because it had
nothing to feed upon. However much
material it found in the days long ago
when everybody expected women to be
weak in every sense of the word, It is an
cient history with which the woman ol
the present has little or no concern.
I>o you know that women are told more
secrets than are men? Women are re
garded as the natural repositories of se
crets. They are thought, and rightly, to
be creatures tender of heart and with a
sympathy so wide and generous that the
whole world might creep into the enjoy
rnent of it aud still there be plenty anc
to spare.
A secret shared, you know, is no longei
a secret. This, however, is a rule with n
blessed exception. It is still a secret
when shared with some one who loves
you dearly, for when you say to this one,
"It is my wish that this be known to only
you," the loving one would never think ol
wounding you by betrayal.
There are not many as generous mind
ed women, I know, as this one—and of a
fact I wish there were—who answered
her husband iu this wise, he having hint
ed that there was something he would
like to tell her, but feared it was best not
to. "My dear," said this generous mind
ed woman, "of course I would like to
know about anything that interests you,
but if to tell it would be to betray the
confidence of another I would not have
you."
The man stooped and gallantly kissed
the hand of the little woman.
"It would be betraying the trust of an
other," he said, "and I thank you for re
minding me of how unworthy it would be
to do so."
The little woman looked up at him and
smiled and then went on placidly reading
her book. There was no thought in her
heart that she had done anything heroic,
and I am certain had her moment of curi
osity been gratified (for she is only hu
man and experienced this) she would not
have felt as satisfied as she did with the
tribute from the man who knows bettei j
than any one else her faults as well as hei i
virtues.
One woman writer a long time ago
said, "a secret at home ia like rocks un
der tide."
Of course the water hides the rocks,
but occasionally the tide is low, and
there is at least a hint of the rocks be
neath, if they are not entirely revealed.
There it no pardon for the disloyalty
of one member of a family to another.
Because it ia impossible to hide from
thoae dwelling under the same roof with
you all the ins and outs of your life is
the very reason that one should respect
every discovery made.
The most honest of us would hardly
make a confession that included the ad
mission of a fault or shortcoming that
would make us appear anything but good
in the eyes of the one to whom we con
fessed, but if you have a confidant to
whom you may even admit your short
coming without fear of falling in her
estimation fortunate, indeed, then are you.
Such a confidant ia usually a mother,
and if she is not she should be. A moth
er should be the very best friend of her
eons as well as ber daughters. First of
all, she must be generous. No matter
bow wrong she thinks this or that she
must be willing to forgive her children
when they tell her or she learns through
some other source that they have been
guilty of those very things which she
most heartily condemns. It is far bet
ter for her to be known to her children
a« a generous judge than as n just one.
There is no chance that her influence for
good will be lesß because she is regard
ed 80.
It is a nice thing to see in a home a
brother "chummy" enough with his sis
ter to relate to her the story of his little
escapades at school or elsewhere. Thi#
sort of sister, you will find, is a very wis*
little body. She knows just how much to
laugh and how much to scold, and to say
that she has influence for good with her
brother is only putting it mildly. She is
bis greatest safety valve, and her sweet,
little, woiu#Mly, gentle ways inspire him
to believe that all women are just as
sensible and trustworthy as she is. A
fellow is apt to have a higher regard for
other fellows' sisters when he entertains
a high one for his own.
If women are to live down the old tra
dition that "women cannot keep secrets,"
then they must set earnestly about prov
ing their worthiness as confidants,
though I would suggest to every one that
she be chary in inviting confidences. It
is burdensome to carry the knowledge
of too many "don't tell" stories. — Mar
garet Hannis iu St. Louis Republic.
NATURE'S WONDERS.
Mount Edgecombe, in Alaska, has one
of the largest craters iu the world, being
five miles in diameter, which is filled with
dense forests 2,000 feet below the rim.
The most noted volcano in Nicaragua
is Coseguiua, which, after a long series of
earthquakes along the Andes mountains
and throughout Central American states,
in June, 1835, broke into violent eruption,
scattering ashes over 1,500 miles of coun
try.
A caretaker in Yellowstone park re
ports the birth of a new geyser in the
Fountain geyser basin. For on hour after
it first burst through the earth it shot a
continuous stream of hot water hundreds
of feet into the air. It now plays regu
arly every two hours.
POLITICAL POINTERS.
If the people have a right to vote, they
iave a right to nominate.—Minneapolis
'imes.
If senators were chosen by direct vote
112 the people, there could be no failure
j elect.—Philadelphia North American.
When a councilman has no visible
euiis of support, it is high time for the
ty to dispense with his services.—To
.'do Blade.
A Girl A
With
V
Will "go" until she drops, and think
she's doing rather a fine thing. Very
often the future shows her that she was
laying the foundation for years of
unhappiness. When the back aches,
when there is irregularity or any other
womanly ill. then the first duty a woman
owes to herself is to fiud a cure for her
ailments.
Th-j use of Dr. Piercs's Favorite Pre
scription in cases of womanly disease
w •!. !.:■ are a prompt restoration to sound
health. Tt r. gul ites the periods, stops
unhealthy drains, heals inflammation
and ulceration, and cures female weak
ness. It makes weak women strong,
sick women well.
Sick women are invited to consult Dr.
Pierce, by letter, free of charge. All
correspondence absolutely private and
confidential. In his thirty years and
over of medical practice Dr. Pierce, as
sisted by his staff of nearly a score of
physicians, has treated and cured more
than half a million women. Address
Dr. R. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y.
"I will drop you a few lines to-day to let you
know that I am feeling well now " writes Miss
Annie Stephens, of Belleville. Wood Co.. West
Va. "I feel like a new woman I took several
bottles of ' Favorite Prescription' and of the
'Golden Medical Discovery ' I have no head
ache now, and no more pain in my side, no
hearing-down pain any more. 1 think that there
is no medicine like l>r. Pierce's medicine."
Dr. Pierce's Common Sense Medical
Adviser, in paper covers, is sent free on
receipt of 21 one-cent stamps to pay ex
pense of mailing only. Address Dr. R. V.
Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y.
HE'D BE ONE OF THEM.
A funny Little Incident flint Wtti
Not Without It* Point.
Everybody looked at her when she en
tered the Cottage Grove avenue car. Be
sides being pretty, she wore the kind of
clothes which one naturally associates
with a carriage aud coachman rather
than a plebeian 5 cent conveyance. Pos
sibly the automobile had broken down.
She swept to a vacant space and sat
down. After she was settled she planted
both hands outspread on the seat at ei
ther side of her. The passengers eyed
her furtively. Perhaps it was a new
style she was introducing, so they held
their peace. Gradually the ear tilled up
until every seat was taken. The empty
spots barnd off by the young woman's
hands alone remained vacant, and inter
est grew. Several persons got on, eyed
her uneasily and took to the straps in
stead. She seemed totally unmoved by
the fact that she was causing her fellow
men inconvenience and was keeping them
from their rights.
Finally the car stopped to let on a
huge son of toil who was evidently go
ing home after a day's labor. He car
ried a tin dinner pail, aud his overalls
were grimy with plaster and dust, lie
stood U feet high, and his face was red
and honest. I lis eyes met the observ
er's squarely, and there was humor lurk
ing in the corners of his mouth.
Without the slightest hesitation after
one rapid glance he proceeded to sit
down next the young woman. As she
had disdained to remove her hand he
also sat down on that.
She jerked it away in anger and re
marked, "Sir," while her eyes flashed,
"I am reserving these seats for two gen
tlemen!" she announced cuttingly, with
the evident idea the interloper would at
once melt away. lie turned a quizzical
look upon the angry girl and settled
back more comfortably.
"That's all right," he said affably.
"I'll be wan iv 'em." —Chicago News.
SOME CURIOUS FOODS.
The ThlnK« That Arc Fnten by the
Natives of Africa.
The lion is eaten by some African
races, but its flesh is held in small es
teem. The Zulus find carrion so much to
their liking that, according to the late
Bishop Colenso, they apply to food peo
pled by large colonies of larvae the ex
pressive word "üborni," signifying in
their uncouth jargon "great happiness."
David Livingstone, that keen and accu
rate observer, reminds us that the aborig
inal Australians aud Hottentots prefer
the Intestines of animals. "It is curious,"
he says, "that this is the part which ani
mals always begin with, and it is the
first choice of our men."
On this point I may remind the civi
lized reader that the woodcock and the
red mullet, or sea woodcock, are both
eaten and relished without undergoing
all the cleansing processes which most
animals used for food among us gener
ally experience to fit them for the table,
so that our aversion to the entrails of an
imals is not absolute, but only one of de
gree. The hippopotamus is a favorite
dish with some Africans when they can
get this unwieldy and formidable river
monster, and when young its llesh is good
and palatable, but with advancing years
It becomes coarse and unpleasant.
The Abyssinians find the rhinoceros to
their taste; so they do the el. pliant, whi< h
is also eaten in Sumatra. Dr. Livingstone
describes the elephant's foot as delicious,
and his praises will be echoed by many
travelers in lands where that sagacious
monster still lingers in rapidly decreasing
numbers. "We had the foot," wrote the
doctor, "cooked for breakfast next morn
ing and found it delicious. It is a whitish
mass, slightly gelatinous and sweet like
marrow. A long march to prevent bil
iousness is a wise precaution after a meal
of elephant's foot.
"Elephant's tongue and trunk are also
good, and after long simnierit"* much
resemble the hemp of a buffalo and the
tongue of an ox, but all the other meat
is tough and from its peculiar flavor only
to be eati nby a b mgry man -Weekly
Bouquet.
LAW POINTS.
Agency to sell goods does not necessari
ly carry with it authority to collect for
same. (35 S. E. ltep., 40' J.)
Agency cannot be proved by the dec
larations of the alleged agent whether
spoken or written. (30 S. E. Itep., Mill.)
Where a principal ratifies the unauthor
ized act of his agent he cannot after
ward avoid the effect of such ratification
by showing that he was not acquainted
with all the facts of the transaction rati
tied where he was in possession of means
of learning same. (03 N. Y. Sup. licp.,
339.)
An agent who has authority to pay
the debt of his principal has atiihority
to promise to pay ii, and where an agent
acting within the scope of his authority
makes a payment on account of the debt
of his principal and nothing more is said
or done a promise to pay the balance of
the debt will be inferred, so as to take
the case out of the statute of limita
tions. (80 L. 'l'., 327.)
WARSHIPS.
The house and senate accomplished
what Spain failed to do. They knocked
«.ut four warships—from the naval ap
propriation bill. —Chicago News.
The British admiralty will give a trial
to the Holland submarine boats. 'lliis
is another triumph for an American iu
vention abroad.—Buffalo Courier.
France is building warships, England
is building warships, and so are Russia,
Italy, Germany, Japan aud other coun
tries. The United States is building a
few and should be building more. Mem
phis Commercial Appeal.
France has taken the first step to
ward increasing her navy by ordering a
number of war vessels of various types
She not only intends to have a much
bigger but a much fleeter fleet than she
Qo w possesses. —Boston Herald.
CHANGED OrETU'OATS
TRIVIAL INCIDENT THAT BROUGHT
ABOUT SERIOUS RESULTS.
A %Hrruti\p Which to Show
What Tremendous Influence** In
il:4iiiticant tftai»|»cniiiK» Ma> Insert
Over the Affair* €»i' Life.
An accidental exchange of overcoats
at a local restaurant one evening re
cently recalled a queer story to au old
lawyer who was dining at the <otlt
er side of the room. "One evening in
the early seventies," he said, "a garcon
hurrying through a crowded cafe not
very far from here knocked down two lints
that had been hanging above a couple of
overcoats on a wall rack, lie picked
them up and restored them to the pegs
and by that simple act condemned a very
estimable gentleman to lour years of
acute mental torment and started anoth
er individual, considerably less estimable,
on a road that led eventually to a sui
cide's grave. The funny part about it
was that the garcon didn't know either
man from Adam's house cat. If he had
been told later on of the trouble he caus
ed. he would probably have had a stroke
of apoplexy. I remember being told that
he was rather fat.
"I am something of a student of causa
tion," continued the old lawyer, "and I
have frequently amused myself by trac
ing out the extraordinary consequences
of some apparently trivial incident. It is
nearly always the shifting of a pebble
that brings down thi nvalanclies of social
life, and in this case- but I will briefly
sketch the facts, and you may draw your
own conclusions.
"The fat garcon, as a matter of course,
hung the hats over the wrong garments,
and a few minutes afterward a young
fellow who had just finished his dinner
got up and walked off with another man's
overcoat. By an odd coincidence it was
so much like his own that he wore it for
a week without discovering the change.
Then one day he felt in the inside pocket
and pulled out several letters that were
strange to him. I think I could repeat
their contents even now from memory,
but there are professional reasons why 1
cannot be very explicit. Suffice it to say
that they put him in possession of certain
facts, partly of a commercial and partly
of a personal nature, that spelled abso
lute ruin for the man whom they con
cerned.
"As I have already hinted, the young
person who stumbled into this informa
tion was not a very estimable eh: t .
but he had plenty of nerve aud shrewd
ness, and he began at once to plan h<.\v
he could turn his discovery into cash.
Meanwhile the other fellow, who was a
quiet, middle aged business man, had
failed to observe that he was wearing
somebody else's coat. I may say right
here that he never found it out and died
in ignorance of a fact that might have
saved him an infinite deal of worry.
"The young man with the incriminat
ing letter was afraid to act personally,
because he was in rather a ticklish posi
tion himself, owing to numerous shady
transactions in the past, and his victim
might easily have turned the tables upon
him. So he made a tool of a miserable
old drunkard, who had once been a law
yer, and they proceeded to put on the
screws. The business man had missed
the letters, of course, but he hadn't the
faintest idea of how he had lost them
and imagined that they had been stolen
out of his coat at his office, aud that
theory, by the way, resulted in the abrupt
discharge of several entirely innocent
and unsuspecting employees.
"When the ex-shyster approached him,
he promptly flew into a panic and paid
the first installment of blackmail almost
without a protest. What followed was
somewhat commonplace," said the old
lawyer musingly, "aud I will merely
skeletonize it. In a year or so the ex
shyster succumbed to prosperity, com
plicated with jimjams, and the man with
the letters had to get a new catspaw. Ho
picked up a queer looking character who
had been a sort of horse doctor and all
around fakir. This fellow knew nothing
of the facts, but merely acted as a go be
tween and used to appear at intervals
with a card on which a certain amount
would be scrawled in pencil.
"It seems incredible, but this went on
for three solid years. Then one day the
victim got desperate and did what he
should have done at first. He came over
to my office and made a clean breast of
the whole affair. I took the bull by the
horns. To begin with, I quietly got out
a warrant for the fake veterinary, ami
when he appeared I gave him 30 seconds
to furnish the name of his principal. That
secured, I swore out a second warrant
and went after the young man myself.
" 'I want those documents,' I said, 'and
also your signature to this confession.'
He blustered a good deal, but my bluff
was the stronger, and inside of 15 min
utes I had what I came after, lie told
me he had found the letters on the floor
of the postoflice, and 1 let it go at that.
But 1 warned him that any future at
tempts at extortion would result in his
instant arrest.
"There the story proper ends, but there
is one thing to add—namely, how I
found out the truth about the overcoats.
It was very simple. My blackmailing
gentleman had become a good deal of a
wreck during his years of successful oper
ation, and not long after I put a period
to his little game his former victim died.
That destroyed any lingering hopes he
may have had of renewing the squeeze,
and he came to my ollice one day and of
fered to tell me exactly how he secured
the letters if I would give him enough
money togo to Chicago. For the sake of
clearing the matter up I accepted the
proposition, and he related the incident
of the cafe. It is undoubtedly true. He
drifted north with the money 1 gave him,
got on a tremendous spree and killed him
self by jumping out of a window."—New
Orleans Times-Democrat.
I>uurn In Chinn.
In China all fence gates that swing
swing in. In America most gates swing
out. In China all doors that swing open
outward. In America doors open in
ward.
The reason given for swinging gates
and doors there in China is that they are
more convenient when they are swung
that way, and it is the custom.
In America the gates and doors are
swung in opposito directions for the
same reason.
The opium war which was declared
against China by Great Itritain in IS4O
was responsible for the opening of that
nation to the world's commerce by means
vf the treaty ports which were after
ward us»ablUhed
THE PEDAGOGUE.
Public schools in Tennessee were open
90 days last year, and the average cost
of tuition per pupil per month was $1.07.
I>r. Voorsanger, rabbi of the Congrega
tion Emanu-F.l of San Francisco, has
given free his services as head of the de
partment of Semitic languages and liter
atures in the University of California.
Professor A. A. Stagg of the Chicago
university says the best thing about foot
ball is that it "curbs the temper and
makes men forbearing and patient." As
a Vale man and oue who has witnessed
many encounters on the gridiron, Mr.
Stagg knows whereof he speaks.
At a convention of head masters in
England recently one of the speakers re
ferred to his fellow drlegates as mem
bers of "a profession without prizes."
The amount of intelligent effort that will
win a college professorship at $3,00U will
secure larger returns in the business
world.
' Tis Easy To Feel Good,
Countless thousands 'have found a
blessing to the body in Dr. Kind's New
Life Pills, which positively cure Con
stipation, Sick Headache. Dizziness.
Jaundice, Malaria. Fever and Ague and
all Liver and Stomach troubles. Pnreh
i vegetable; never gripe or weaken Only
' 2. r M- at PauleH and Co's. drugstore.
Tit* IT VOtRSKLF.
You can tell jll-1 as well as a physician
whether your kidneys are diseased or
healthy. The way todois totakea bot
tle or glass tumbler, and till it with urine.
If there ha sediment —a powderlike
substance at the bottom alter standing
a day and a night, there is something
wrung with the killneys. Another sure
Mun of disease is adesireto urinate often,
and still anothei sign is | >ai n in the back.
If urine stains linen, there is no doubt
that the kidneys arc alleeted.
\nv and all diseast -of the kidneys,
liver, bladder and of the urinary passag
es and constipation of the bowels arectir
jedbv Dr. David Kennedy's Favoritt
Kemedv- There is no question about its
being the best and siiiest medicine in
the world for such troubles. It quickly
relieves and cures inability to hold urine
and people, young or old, who take it
are not compelled to get u|> a number of
times during the night. For putting an
end to that scalding pain experience!l in
passing urine, nothing is so good as Dr.
David Kennedy s Favorite Remedy. It
corrects the bad ellects of whiskey and
beer; is pleasant to the taste, and does
not seam to be medicine at all. Diseas
es of the kidneys and the bladder often
require the u eof instruments to push
back the sandy matter so the urine can
be voided. In such cafes Favorite Kem
edv should be taken without further de
lay or the disease may prove fatal. It is
sold for one dollar a bottle at all drug
stores. It is well worth many times its
price.
Saiiiplt-M
If you wish to test Dr. David Kenne
dy's Favorite Kemed v before buying to
send your full post oiliee address to the
Dr. David Kennedy Corporation, Rond
out, N. Y., and mention this paper. We
will then mail you a sample bottle free,
as well as circulars giving full directions
lor its use. Kvery reader of the M<>n
toi'K Amkuuan can depend upon the
genuineness of this liberal offer and all
.-ull'erers from kidney troubles should
take advantage once of it at
PEN, PENCIL AND BRUSH.
James Whitcomb Riley says lie trav
els slowly now. '"The bones of many a
lecturer," lie adds, "bestrew the northern
prairie because 'if the thoughtless rush
of some professional managers."
It is stated that the first issue of
Scott's "Guy Mannering" iu the original
boards ami uncut is almost as scarce as
"Waverley," of which a copy was sold
something less than two years ago for
$750.
Arnold Boeckiin, the great Swiss
painter, died recently at Fiesole at the
ago of 74 years. lie was best known
by his romantic, mythological pictures.
A few months ago his son was convicted
of a murderous assault on a woman and
is now in prison.
Ilendrik Willem Mesdag, the painter,
celebrated his seventieth birthday the
other day at The Hague. Although he did
not begin to paint until ho was 35 years
old, he advanced so rapidly to fame that
in 1870 he gained the gold medal at the
Paris exhibition. He then settled at The
Hague, an<l bis ample fortune enabled
him to gather together one of the rich
est collections of modern art in Europe.
THE ROYAL BOX.
Emperor William has presented to
Chief Mataafa, the Samoan potentate, an
ebony staff, silver mounted, bearing the
kaiser's coat of arms.
King Edward has revived the ancient
practice of conferring the Order of the
Garter upon ladies, the title of "lady"
of that order being conferred upon Queen
Alexandra by his special command.
l'rince Ernest of Saxe-Altenburg, who
is a student of astronomy, has published
a study on astrophysic and astronomical
photography. It meets with considera
ble appreciation in scientific circles.
The Empress Frederick is not idle
during her illness. She paints and
sketches and interests herself in house
hold questions. Sometimes she takes up
a philosophical work and makes mar
ginal notes.
Queen W'illielmina is the patroness of
the total abstinence movement in the
Low Countries. It is reasonably proba
ble that she will by a temperate regime
preserve more perfectly her health and
her pretty figure than have some other
of the heavy drinking feminine royalties
of Europe.
C*i« of Queer llfvfnue.
In England, where men have more
time for everything, including revenge,
some queer methods of playing even
have come Into the courts.
Albert Bewdlev of Leeds had a dog
that howled at night. A naturalist next
door did not like it, but had no legal
recourse.
One day ants of the minute red vari
ety began to overrun Bewdley's house.
Nothing that could be done headed
them off. They grew worse and worse.
He had made up his mind to break his
lease and move when one night lie
heard a noise In his dining room. Slip
ping down, he found the naturalist
emptying a bag of ants on the floor.
In court the naturalist paid damages,
but lie did it smilingly.
Rowley, the late English violinist,
was hard to beat on his perseverance
against one who had incurred his ill
will.
Rowley had a quarrel with a horse
dealer named Brant. It was a trivial
matter, but Rowley took the next house
to Brant, sot up a piano, bought a cor
net and proceeded to make insomnia
for Brant.
After one or two assault cases in
court Brant moved. Rowley bought
out the next door neighbor and follow
ed with x>iano and cornet. Brant went
to law, but found he could do nothing.
Falling, he took a detached house. Then
Rowley hired brass bands and organs
and assailed liitn. This was actionable,
and Rowley paid £l,<hkj for his revenge.
-Chicago Tribune.
Tlie (iolfcr'N I'iin.
At a recent auction sale one of the
paintings had for a subject a gayly at
tired golf girl making a long drive. The
bidding on this opened very brisk—s''«o,
stls, S7O and finally s7'2.
"Seventy-two, two, two, two!" cried
the auctioneer.
"Fore!" shouted some one in the
rear.
With the exception of the golfer In
the front row, who immediately "duck
ed," the joke passed unnoticed.
"Four," repeated the auctioneer. "Do
I bear five?"
He did not hear "live," and a cold
sweat broke out on the brow of the
last bidder as now, for the first time,
the possibility of having to buy that
picture occurred to him. Seventy-four
dollars for making a pun! He made a
solemn vow then and there that he
would never attempt another as with a
sickly grin lie thought of unpaid bills.
The attendant was standing at his el
bow; the auctioneer had raised his
hammer. "One—-two— th"—
"Five!"
The ordeal wsts past. The auction
proceeded, with the crowd unaware
that the punster had received proper
punishment.
For the benefit of those who do not
play golf a diagram of tlie pun is fur
nished. "Fore" is the warning shouted
by the player when about to drive. —
New York Mail and Express.
When a friend is In trouble, don't
ask, "Can 1 do anything?" I>o some
thing.—Atchison <Jlobe.
Do but half of what you can, and
you will be surprised at your own dill
fence.
I'll I U)K EX'S COLUMN.
Don 'IVIIm lli* Story.
1 am a rough coated Scotch collie and
iny name is Don.
When 1 was just six weeks old, they
took me from my mamma, put me in a
crate and sent me to Brooklyn. 1 cried
so hard the kind hearted expressman
took me out of the box anil held nic in
his anus until I reached my new home.
When iiiv master first saw me, ho said
I looked like a little black muff; this
hurt uij pride and for one year I just
gave them all a dreadful time. 1 tore
their shoes and hats, cried at night and
ran away every chance 1 had. But when
Tnis IS DOS SMILING,
I was a year old I began to thiak that
such actions were out of place for a dog
of my pedigree. I began to obey my
master and to love him. He taught me
a great many tricks, but he never whipped
me to make me do them like some mas
ters do.
I do not like strangers very well, but I
love every one in my master's family and
they all say they are never afraid when
I am with them.
In the summer I have a fine time, for I
always goto the country, and this pic
ture of me my master took with his own
camera. 1 was made to sit upon the
gatepost, and really, I was afraid I
would fall off; hut master said, "It's ail
right, Don," and I knew it was, so I
sat still and smiled.—Brooklyn Eagle.
Loyal to HIM Mother.
The late Dr. John Ilall told of a poor
woman who had sent her boy to school
and college. When he was to graduate,
he wrote to his mother to come, but she
sent back word that she could not, be
cause tier only skirt had already been
turned once. She was so shabby she
was afraid he would be ashamed of her.
He wrote back that he didn't care any
thing about how she went. He met her
ut the station and took her to a nice
place to stay. The day arrived for his
graduation, and he came down the broad
aisle with that poor mother, dressed very
shabbily, and put her into one of the best
seats in the house.
To her great surprise he was tlie val
edictorian of his class and carried every
thing before hiin. He won a prize, and
when it was given to him he went down
before the whole audience and kissed his
mother and said: "Here, mother, is the
prize. It is yours. I would not have had
it if it had not been for you."—Christian
Standard.
(iooil Coßillnjr.
There is a spot in the Swiss Alps where
a sled or a toboggan runs a mile in TO
seconds. The winter sportsmen of Eu
rope take great pleasure in the Crest a
run, as it is called, at St. Moritz. The
toboggan season begins there about the
middle of November. The condition of
the run is not left to chance, but the slide
is prepared under the directions of a com
mittee. The Swiss toboggans are raised
on runners shod with iron or steel. The
rider lies prone upon the toboggan, head
foremost, both hands grasping the frame
work at the sides and both feet employed
in steering. Iron spikes are secured to
the toes of the boots.
An Optical lllanloo.
Among optical illusions one of the most
curious is the "ring trick." It consists
of four rings so drawn that if held a
CHANGES WIIILE YOU LOOK,
yard or two away and looked at steadily
for a few minutes it will appear as if
they had changed and turned inside out.
Tins is a difficult trick to explain, it is
simply one of those strange deceptions
which lead us to believe that while we
are looking at an inanimate object it un
dergoes some inexplicable alteration.
Him First I'riic.
Jolinnv 11. was a lad, ofton good, often had,
Just an onl'narv everyday boy;
In his lessons, alas, at the foot of his class,
For study John did not enjoy.
Home came he one day, very proud to display
A book that he'd won as a prize.
His mother said, "Why, my sun, you rlid try!"
And kissed him, with tears in her eyes.
But Johnny blushed red and hunsr dmvn his head
As he cried: "Wait a liniment, dear inclherl
I couldn't help win, 112 i lip- class I am iu
Was only just me and one other.
"And when teacher said for the boy who was head
To kindly step forward that day,
I had just to reach out my hand for the book,
Kor the otlur fellow*—lie was away."
—Kathcrinc Paul in Philadelphia Times.
.fobiiiiy'H Clinrity.
Mother—Johnny, what became of the
piece of cake I left on this plate?
Johnny (aged s)—l gave it to a poor,
hungry little boy, mamma.
Mother That's right, dear. I'm glad
to see you are inclined to be charitable.
But who was the poor little fellow?
Johnuy—Me.
A.i lo Gustier..
"My dear," said a careful mother to
her daughter, "don't gush."
"Very well, mamma," replied the
dutiful girl, "but yon know that in the
oil regions it is the gushing wells that
are thought the most of."
"But you must also bear in mind
that it is ti:e unrefined oil which
gushes."— Pittsburg Chronicle.
Jnpnnrse Story Teller..
Professional story tellers roam from
house to house in Japan to spin their
yarns. In the city of Tokyo there are
about <»ih* of these professional ro
mancers Their pay averages 20 cents
an hour. When the story teller discov
ers that his romances are becoming
dull from frequent repetition, lie moves
Into a new district.
Job Couldn't Have Stood It
If he'd had itching Piles. They're ter
ly amioving: but Buckleti'.s Arnica,
jpvc will cure the worst case of i'iles
's' earth. It has cured thousands. For
fc>iiries. Pains or Bodily Eruptions it's
toe best-salve in the world. Price 25c a
fyuc. Cure guaranteed. Sold by Panics
and Co. druggists.
APHORISMS.
Sorrow'?? best antidote is employ
ment—Young.
All cruelty springs from hard heart
ed ness and weakness.—Seneca.
Delicacy Is to the mind what fra
grance Is to the fruit.—l'oiucelot.
Contempt is the only way to triumph
over calumny.—Mine, do Ma in tenon.
The usual fortune of complaint is to
excite contempt more than pity.—John
son.
Consideration is the soil in which
wisdom may be expected to grow and
strength he given to every upbringing
plant of duty.—Emerson.
All the while that thou livest ill thou
hast the trouble, distraction and in
conveniences of life, but not the swoct
and true use of it.—Fuller.
Enjoy the blessings of the day If
God sends them and the evils bear pa
tiently and sweetly, for this day only
is ours; we are dead to yesterday and
not born tomorrow.—Jeremy Taylor.
SIDE LIGHTS ON LIFE.
A hero of today has no title deed for
tomorrow.
Painless dentistry is merely the art
of drawing it mild.
A kiss by moonlight is one of love's
strongest arguments.
It seems hardly possible that the
members of the New York Yacht club
will so far ignore public opinion and
the tenets of good sportsmanship as to
insist that no yacht not owned by a
member of that organization shall be
allowed to enter the competition to de
cide what boat shall race with Sir
Thomas Upton's new yacht for the
America's cup. The races for this val
ued trophy have been international
events ever since the racing days of the
America herself. They have been con
tested between the best skill of the
United States and the best skill of the
British. While those races have hith
erto been conducted under the auspices
of the New York Yacht club, there
should be no bar against a boat built
or owned by persons other than mem
bers of the club pro-rided such boat
shall prove itself faster than the club
members' boat. A candidate for the
honor of cup defender is being built by
Mr. Lawson of Boston and is to be
known as the Independence. The state
ment has been made that this yacht
would not be permitted to enter the
competitive races preliminary to the
main contest, for the reason that Mr.
Lawson is not a member of the New
York Yacht club. It is understood,
however, that arrangements have been
made by which the Independence will
be temporarily turned over to a mem
ber of the New York club and will be
given full and fair opportunity to dem
onstrate her speed in the preliminary
trials, and if she proves herself supe
rior to the craft being built by the
Ilerreslioffs for the Belmont syndicate,
which is composed of members of the
New York Yacht club, the Boston boat
will be the defender of the cup. The
American people have very little inter
est in the New York Yacht club, the
Belmont syndicate or Mr. I.awsou, but
they do -fed a lively concern in the re
tention of the Atiii-rica'o cup and hope
to see it del"i in!, d bj the best possible
product ef A .;.boatbuilding skill
and se-uuaii. hip.
Store Uultnra.
Low prices are here —but so are high
values.
We have several prices to fit several
values.
We trade so that you can tell of your
bargains.
We are pleased when you goto other
stores first.
Low prices and good quality make us
prosperous.
To lead in every line we offer is onr
first ambition.
You can have our best advice when
you ask for it
Nothing gets customers so certainly
as fair dc
We don't know everything, and we
ask your criticism.
Nasal
CATARRH MM*
In all its stau-es tUerc <O(&g}K)M
should be cleanliness.
Ely's Cream Balm J*
cleanses, soothes and heals
the diseased membrane.
It cures catarrh and drives M
away a cold iu the head
quickly.
Cream Balm is placed Into the nostrils, spreads
over the membrane and is absorbed. Relief is im
mediate and a cure follows. It is not drying—does
not produce sneezing. Large Size, 50 cents at Drug
gists or by mail; Trial Size, 10 cents by mail.
ELY BROTHERS, 50 Warren Street, New York.
Red I Suppressed
Menstruation
UrOSS PAINFUL
T* Nenstruatlon
| anSV And a PREVENTIVB for
B I fimale ~j>
■ || IRREGULARITIES
111 C% Are Safe and Reliable.
■ 111 f^T^Perfectl^Jtarmless
The Ladies' \
?RiCEsi.oo
Sent postpaid on receipt of
price. Money refunded if not as
" y - Yin de Cinchona Co.
Des Moines, lowa.
THE HANDIEST AND BEST WAY TO
A PAN IS BY THE*
Handiest qrn? Best Route betwe^i
J? THE PAN-AMERICAN EXPOSITION
W** ant NEW YORK is the BB
For Information, Rates, etc., address li'lniT'ltl'lllli'l
429 BROADWAY, N Y. 289 MAIN »T., BUFFALO, 103 ADAMS ST., CHICAGO.
EIGHTH 4 OLIVE 3TS., ST. L0UI». 28 EXCHANGE PLACE, N.V.
T. E. Clarke, T. w. lec, b. d. Caldwell. ■yijUUL±JJ|
Gen'l Superintendent. Gen'l Passenger Ag't. Traffic Manager.
D.L.&W. RAILROAD.
TIME TABLE.
In Effect September Ist, 1899
GOING WEST
•NEW YOBK. : P. M . A. M.| P.M
Barclay Kt Lv. , AO 'lO uo ....
I'ristopher St... „ ! lu oo ••••
Ifobokc-U „ 45 | **.**! 10 15
scranton Ar 230
'(lllilj ! | rji
A *-. M. 336 J
SCRANTON ' 10 UO 561 340 a ,**
lielievue j .... 345 *>
Taylorviile i. ii'i'ii 2 03' 3 52*j
L..ackawanna {N 2 10 : 3 65 !. U
Duryea , „ 2 13 3 59 •» W
pittiton 2 } 7
Susquehanna Ave...l 10 <£ 14:40 405 ; *
West Flttston e 6 I<> 8» »*> 1 VI! « $
Wyoming ;- n , n t . 229 4
Forty Fort I.:!: ' 0 10,4 ' 4lb 638
Bennett ii*. J v ai, 42) ••••
Kingston I JO' W 2 42 4
Kingston I : L 0 . TL 244 * 3J "
Fly mouth June... J 247 * 36'# j**
Avonilale 1 2 57
Nanticoke i 1113 302 .... '
HunlockX , 11 iy 310 ....
Shickshinny I 1 JL ;W 324 ....
Hick's Ferry j fn 43 335
Beach Haven i 11 4g 842 ....
Berwick 1 11 54 34y
Briar Creek j | 112 3 56 ....
Lime Ridge ; 0 fii'oti 404 ....
Espy ; 88> 12 15 411 ....
Hloomsburg M 1222 41" !
Kupert i 8 6i 12 27 423 j
Catawlssa Bbt 12 32 429
Dar.ville i» 10 12 4? 442 .... 1
Chulasky I ... 4 49 ~..|
Cameron !«2 *ii*67 464 .... ' K
NORTHUMBERLAND 9 36| 110 608 .... 900
AR. A M | p. M. p. M. P.M. KM
GOING EAST
ITATIONS. I'AS ' PAB. PAB. PAB.IpAB
' j I j
Niw YOHK n.IRI: P-'»•' a.in a.lll. am
Barclay M, Ar. 3301 600 640
Christopher St... 3 00! 465 635
Hoboken 2 47 | 44*: 926
Scranton 10 05; 12 55[ 140
______ a m.I P.m. j am
'daily j I P.M
A.M. P- M. P. X. P. M. dIV
Scranton 9 42, 12 35 465 5359 07
Bellevue 9 3* 1 460 6309 02
Taylorville 933 445 6 25.8 57
Lackawanna 9 3b' 437 6 1(47
Huryea » 2;S! i 4 34; 5 84*
Flttston A 1912 17 4 29; 6 844
Susquehanna Ave.. 915 12 14 424 6 |S3O
West Flttston »12 .... i 421 6, I&86
Wyoming yOB IS 0b 4lb I 5 |822
Forty Fort 9 0.)! .... 4 10! 4 828
Bennett y 00' j 4 Oti 4 824
Kingston, 8 67112 02 *O4 4 821
Kingston 85512 00 402 4 810
Flymouth .1 unction 8 501 I 365 4 4 818
Flymouth 845 11 52 351 441 801
Avondale 8 40 ! 3 4ti| 8 Oti
Nanticoke 835 11 45 342 ;7 51
Hunlock 8 8 27 3 34: "46
Shlckshinny t 10; 11 30 324 "38
Hick's Ferry 804 1 3 13 "25
Beaeh Haven 7 63 i 307 17 12
Berwick T 45! 11 04 301 17 06
Briar Creok 7 U8 j I!" 00
Lime Ridge 730 ! 248 e5 2
Espy 7 23: 10 46 242 845
Bloomsburg... 715 10 41 2 36'.... # 3!T
Kupert 709 10 3b : 2 31! 633
Catawissa 703 lo 32 226 828
Danville 850 10 21 2 12j ,® *3
Chulasky i j ! 0 07
Cameron 638 j* j HOB
NORTHUMBBBL'D... 625 1000! 150 650
LV A.M. A.M. r. M. I*. M- I P.M
Connections at Rupert with Fhlladelphta k
Reading Railroad for Tamanend, Tamaqua,
Wiliiamsport, Sunburv, Fottsville, etc. At
Northumberland with F and E. Div. P. R. R. for
Harrisburg. Lock Haven, Emporium, Warren
Corry, and Erie.
PEimuii nil
TIME TA.BLE
In Effect h . 18th, 190-
~TA M IA. M.i PM.P. M I
Scranton(l)i&H)lv j 6 4"> g» 38 2 IX \\ 27
I'ittston " " 7 08jfl0 00l$ 242'4 52
A. M. A. M. P.M. P.M
Wilkesbarre,.. lv § 7 3<» $lO 35 U 308 j6 00
Plym'th Kerry '• 1 7 37 f1042 1 3 16 fe 07
Santicoke " 746 10 50 326 6 17'"
Mocanaqua " 804 11 07 846 637
Wapwallopen.. " 813 11 Itii 356 647
Nescopeck ar 824 11 20 407 700 [[]]][
A.M. P.M. P.M.
Fottsville lv J 5 501 sia oi g
Hazleton " 705 200 650
Tomhlcken " 722 218 010
Kern Olen " 729 227 ti 18
Kock <llen "I 7 35 234 ti 25
Nescopeck ar! 8 tfi 300 t» 50 *^*2l
Catawissa... ,ari
A. M A.M |P. M. P M
Nescopeck lv §8 24 §ll 26 407 «7 00!
Creasv " 833 11 3li| 410 709
Espy Kerry.... " 112 8 43 U 46;1 4 24 7 2n
E. Hloomsburg, "j 847 11 soj 4 2!' 725
j |
Catawlssa ar! 856 11 57 4 36, fB2
Catawissa Iv[ 856 11 57 4 35: 732
South Danville "j 9 14 12 15 4 53| 751
Sunbury "j 935 12 40 l 5 15j 8 15 (
A.M. P.M. P. M ni.
Sunbury lv || 942 § 1 loj§ 545 tj 40
Lewisburg.... ar 10 13 145 fl lis;
Milton " 10 08 139 614 904
Willlamsport.. " 11 00 230 7 10 950
Lock Haven... " 11 69 340 807
Kenovo "A.M. 440 900
Kane " 8 25 |
P.M. P.M.
Lock Haven..lv gl2 10'! l 345 1
Kellefonte ....ar 105 a 444
Tyrone " 2 Is|il ti 00
Pbillpsburg " 441§ 8 28 [
Clearfield.... " 537S 9 09
Pittsburg.... " ti 55 911 30 1
A.M. P.M. P.M. P~~Mj
Sunbury lv 960 5 1 55'j| 525 (8 31!
Harrisburg.... ar, 11 30:5 315jj ti 55,10 10:
P. M.i P. M. P. M. j A~M
Philadelphia., ar § 3 17!|| 623 ||lo 20 425
Haltimore 3 11 ~ 6 00 | 9 45' 2 30 !
Washington ... " g 4 10,j, 7 16 10 55 4 05
[ A . M. P.M.' 1
Sunbury lv jjio 00 § 2 03: j
Lewistown Jc. ar 11 10 350 . 1
Pittsburg •'! ti 55j§11 3u j 1
A M P, M P. M. I' M
Harrisburg.... lv !,11 46,il 3 46 d 7 20 81025
P.M. A.M.AM
littsburg ari i| fi 55||| 1130j|| 1 50 5 30
!p. M.I I* M A MI A M]
Pittsburg lv }7 10 830 3 00||H 00 ...
A.M A Ml I P M
Harrisburg.... ar j 1 553 34u i 930j 3 10 ...
AM| IAM| ~
PlttsbUJg lv: I \ 8 00
| P M
L.ewistown Jj. "j 7 30 j 8 10
Sunbury ari ; 9 2U g 6 OOj
P. M.I A Ml A MIAMI
Washington... lv 10 40 > ( 7 5" jillo 50
Haltimore "jail 41] J 450 l 8 4k» 11 45!'. ..
Philadelphia... "j ,11 20] 1 4 2.*.; i S 30 jl2 26
A. M. A MiA. M.| P M
j Harrisburg.... lv: J3 35 755 ill 40ji 400
Sunbury ar. j 5 051, 9 »•;* 1 10jj 640 ]
jp.M. Ia M A M _
Pittsburg 1\ sl2 46 i 1 3 00 5 8 0"
Clearfield.... " 4 09 .....I
I'liilipsburg.. " 456 i 10 12 ''
Tyrone " 715 II 810 12 30|"
Hellefonte.. " 831 j 932 1 42|"
la>cU Haven ar 930 j 10 30 243 ...
P. M. A M A M| P M
Erie lv, | 5 351 1 1
Kane, "| s 40 U 600
Kenovo "l 12 40 ■, ti 45| 10 30: I'"
Lock Haven.... " 125' 7 35 11 25 300
I A.M I' M
Williamsport.. "j 210 8 30;i12 101 400
Milton -'I 222 9 l!»! 127 4 .'>2
Lewisburg "j 9 05j 1 15 447
Sunbury ar 310 V 4t>i 1 651 620
A.M. A M P Mj P M "
Sunbury lv s 742 955 i 2 00't 548
South Kauville " 713 «iO 17 j 221 j 609
Catawlssa "| 733 lo 36! 2 3ti; 627
Eli looms burg.. 739 10 43 2 43: 632
Espy Kerry "j 743 fit 471 !l 636
Creasy " 753 10 661 2Vi ti 46
Nescopeck "j 803 11 05| 305 6 66!
A M A MjP. M. P M j
Catawlssa lv] 7 38 :
Nescopeck lv sill 35 112 4 10 "i 705
i Kock (Hen ar 8 2tl 12 01! 430 7 311
I Kern (Hen " 833 12 07| 142 737
Touihicken " 842 12 15j 451 745
Hazleton " 902 12 3-"> 5 12| 806 •••*
Pottsville " 10 05. 220 ti 30 905 ;;;;
A M A MP M P M
Nescopeck lv 'i 8 03:1 II <>6,g 3 051 ii 655
: Wapwallopen..ar 818 11 20 3 19' 7 on ....
| Mocanauua .... "j 8 28i 11 32 820 7 2l|
] Nantieoke "1 848 11 64 348 742 ....
1 P Ml
: Plym'th Kerry ' f8 57 12 0a s 571 17 62
Wllksbarre ..." 905 12 10 4 Ogl 800
A M P MP M P M
PlltSton(l)AH) ar ;V 29 12 49 g4 60 836
1 Scranton " "I 10 08 118'524 ? 9 05
112 Weekdays. I I'aiiy. < Flag station.
i Additional Train leaves Hazleton 5.15 p. in.,
I Tomhlcken 5.35 p. in., Kern Glen 5.43 p.m.,
: lioek (ilen 5.50 p. in., arriving at Catawissa
6.25 p. in.
Pullman Parlor and Sleeping Cars run on
through trams between Sunbury, Williamsport
: and Krie. between Sunbury sml Philadelphia
! and Washington and between Harrisburg, Pitts
burg ind the West.
Kor I jrther information apply to Ticket Ag»»ts
f.li HUTCnrNSON, J. li. WOOD,
Uen'l Manager. Gtn'l Pans n'r Ay.
Shoes, Shoes
St3rlisJn !
Ciieap !
IFSelia.'ble 1
Bicycle, Cymnasium and
Tennis Shoes.
THE CELEBRATED
Carlisle Shoes
ANI) THE
Snag Proof
Rubber Hoots
A SPECIALTY.
A. SCHATZ.
son nv!
A Rellatol©
TO SHOP
For all kind of Tin Roofing,
Spoutlne and Ceneral
Job Work.
Stoyes, Heaters, Ranges,
Furnaces, eto.
PRICES THE LOWEST!
QUALITY THE BEST!
JOHN HIXSON
NO. 116 E. FRONT 3T.
JOH3ST W. PARNSWORTH
INSURANCE
Lib Fire Accident ail Steam Boiler
Offlc*: N*ntcom*«7 Building, Mill StrMt,
Danville, - - Penn'a
PHILADELPHIA &
READING RAILWAY
IN EFFECT MARCH 80. 1901
TKAINS LEAVE DANVII.L.E
(weekdays only)
For Philadelphia 11.25 a m.
For New York 11.25 a m,
For Uatawlssa 11.25 a. m., 6.04 p. m.
For Milton 7.32 a. m., 4.00 p m.
For Williamsport 7.82 a. m., 4.00 p m.
Trains for Baltimore, Washington and the
South leave Twenty-fourth and Chestnut
Streets, Philadelphia, weekdays—3.2B, T. 14
10.22 a. in., 12.16, 1.33, 3.03, 4.12, 5.03, 7.26, 8.26 p.
m., 12.21 night. Sundays 3.23, 7.14 a. m., 12.18
1.33, 4.12, 6.03. 7.28, 8.26 p. 18.
ATLANTIC CITY RAILROAD,
Leave Philadelphia, Chestnut Street Wharf
and South Street Wharf.
WEEKDAYS— Express 6.00, 9.01) a. m., (Satur
days only 1.00) 2.00 4.00,5.00, 7.15 p. m. Ac
commodation 8.00 a. m., 5.30 p. m. Sunday
Express, 6.00. 9.00,10.00 a. ni., 7.15 p. m. Ac
commodation 8.00 a. ill., 5.00 p. in.
Leave ATLANTIC CITY DEPOT—'Week
days—Express 7.35, ».00, 10.15 a. ill., 2.50, 5.30,
ti.oO p. ni. Accommodation 8.05 a. ni., 4.06 p,
m. Sundays Express—lo.ls a. m., 4.30, 5.5),
8.00 p. ui. Accommodation—7.ls a. in., 4.05
p. m.
Parlor cars on all express trains.
LEAVE PHILADELPHIA.
For CAPE MAY and OCEAN ClTY—Week
days—9.lsa. in., 4.15 p.m. Sundays- 9.15 a.m.
South St., 9.00 a.m. Additional for Cape
May- Weekdays- 5.00 p. m. I
For SEA ISLE ClTY—Weekdays—B.ls a. in.
5.00 p. m.
NEW YORK AND ATLANTIC CITY
EXPRESS. j
Leave NEW YOKK (Liberty Street) 3.40 P. M
Leave ATLANTIC CITY, 8.80 A. M.
Detailed time tables at ticket offices.
W G BESLEK, EDSON J WEEKS
Oen. Superintendent General Agent.
New
Coal Yard!
R. J. Pegg, Coal
Dealer, has re
moved to his new
COAL YARD.
OFFICE:— No. 344 F ERR Y
Street (near D. L & W. R.
R. Crossing )
Yard —In rear ofOffiee.
Robert J. Pegg,
COAL DEALER.
Telephone No 158