DO YOU GET UP
WITH A LAME BACK?
gldnej Trouble Hakes Too Miserable.
Almost everybody who reads the news-
rs Is sure to snow ui me wonaenui
cures made by Dr.
Kilmer's Swir-ip-Root,
the great kidney, liver
j and bladder remedy.
It Is the treat medi-
i cal triumph of the nlne
i teenth century: dls
, covered after years of
, scientific research by
, Dr. Kilmer, the emi
nent kidney and blad
der specialist, and ts
wonderfully successful In promptly curing
lune back, kidney, bladder, urlr. acid trou
bles and Bright s Disease, which Is the worst
form of kidney trouble.
Dr. Kilmer's Swamp-Root Is not rec
ommended for everything but If you have kid
ney, liver or bladder trouble It will be found
just the remedy you need. It has been tested
In so many ways, in hospital work, in private
practice, among the helpless too poor to pur
chase relief and has proved so successful in
every case that a special arrangement his
been made by which all readers of this paper
who have not already tried it, may have a
sample bottle sent free by mail, also a book
telling more about Swamp-Root and how to
find out if yu have kidney or bladder trouble.
When writing mention reading this generous
offer In this paper and
send your address to
Dr. Kilmer & Co., Bing
hamton, N. Y. The
reeular fifty cent and Boom of taap-Roea,
dollar sizes are sold by all good druggist.
MSTt. VANIA KAIL IDA ,
Siinbury A Lewistown Division.
In effect Nov. 25, 1900.
IATW1RU
r a
:m
ii.i
119
32
2 3!
.Ml
no
4
2S.1
too
SCT
113
H
tVi
S80
H.V
B4!,
147
SKI
'.1 !S7 Hunbury
Iflu7 Stjlinesrove Junction
1011 BsllrMsrrova
101 I'awllnir
10 M Kreaniar
iii 27 Matter
11)33 MirittUburit
103s Koiifrr
10 41 Ilraveitowii
In M AclnmnburK
l"J7 Raiibn Mills
1103 Mcl'lure
11 13 Wauiir
11 14 Sliiiillr
1121 I'alnWrvlll
1127 Maitland
11 i!i I,ewletown
II 87 Lewtesown (Main Street.
1140 Lawtatown Junction.
Train leaves Suubury 5 30 p m, ar-
riveH at Selinsgrove 5 45 p m
e 8ti-SelirjBKrover!:00p. m., arrives
at Sunbury 6:i5 p. m.
Trains leave Lewiittown Junction :
4 W a m, 10 IS a m, 1 10 p m,180p m & ttp m, 7 07p
m, 13 01 a m tor Altoona, Pittsburg and the Wt.
Kor Haltimore and Wahinrton 8fr am van.
1W. I :S 4 83 a 10 m For Philadelphia anil New
York s .v. s os, ii so a m. I 02 l 33 4 as and 1118 r
B Ksr tlarrlsbare; i 10 i ra
Philadelphia & Erie R R Division
AND
NOHTHBKN 4'KNTKAI. RAILWAY
WESTWARD,
Train i-avM 9 -Uoigrovfl Junction dally tor
Rxuik ii j and Watt.
9 S3 am, 1158 p m, 8 83 p m.S inday v 83 a m,
8 43 p m.
Trslus leave Sunbury daily aieept Sunday:
1 2i i in tor R rr.Uo. Brie aad ttanaoiUlaua
1 10 m for Kellefonte Erie and 4Ianandalxua
12 a m for liek Haven, Tyrone and the Wasi.
1 10 ; m tor Rvllaronte KVie Tyrone and t'anac
datina S 48 p m lor keoovo and Kim Ira
1 40 p m lor WUUamsport
Sunday 1 '21 a m for Buffalo rla Emporium, 8 10
a m for Erie and mn ti.UlKua
aim for Look Haven anil 8 83 pm for Wli
Uaatport
50 a m, 9 M a ra 2 00 and 5 48 pm tor Wiike
lurre and Haxelton
1 10 a m lo 1(1 am, 2 fKl p m. 3 45 p m lor Shamo
lln ami Mount funnel
Sands )SJa lor Wllkerbarre
EASTWARD,
rralnn leave Sellnogrove Junction
10 00 a in, dally arriving at fbll idelpbla
317 pin New York 5 33pm Baltimore 3 11 p m
WaftitnKton 418 pm
534 . m daily arriving at Philadelphia
,ii jo i in New York 3 63 a m, Baltimore 8 48 p m
Washington 10 58 p m.
S4!li m, ually arrivlna at Philadelphia
4 tea New York 713 a id. Baltimore 1311 am
Washington 4 04 a nr.
I'ra'usi alro leave Hnnhury :
2 27 a id dally arrivlna at Phlladeldhla 8 81 a m
nsiumor o 35 a in warm irtoQ J 40 am new
York u 33 a m Weekdaye, 10 a a a Sandaye,
7 50 am week day arriving at Philadelphia
1148 am, New York 2 u p m, Jiultlmcre 1153
a m, Washington 1 00 p m.
135 p ui, week day arrivlna at Philadelphia
123 p m. New York 9 30 p m, Baltimore 8 ou p m
Washington 7 16 p m
Train, also leave Sunbury at 9 60 a m and 6 23
and 8 31pm, lor HarrlauurK, Philadelphia and
Ball I mure
I. H. Win Hi, (ic-u'l Pane Agent
J.B. HlTTCHINKOl Uen'l Manasar.
IN COMBINATION WITH THE POST.
We give below some clubbing
combinations with the Post. The
rates quoted are very low.
Tlie New York Tri-Weekly Tri
bune ami the Miiklleburg 1kt, one
year, paid in advance, only $1.75.
The Tri-Weekly la publiahed Monday,
Wednesday aad Friday, reaches a large
roportion of nbacrlneni on date ot
Issue, and each edition ia a thoroughly
up-to-date dally family newspaper for
Imay people.
The New York Weekly Tribune
and the Middleburg Post, one year,
paid in advance, ouly $1.25
The Weekly Tribune Is publiabed on
Thursday, and gives all Important nowa
of nation and world, the moat reliabia
market reports, unexcelled agricultural
department, reliable general Informa
tion and choice and entertaining mis
cellany. It ia the "people's paper" for
the entire United Statea, a naMnel fam
ily paper for farmera and vlluigera.
The New York Tri-Weekly World
and the Middleburg Post, one year,
paid in advance, only $1.65.
The Tri-Weekly World eomea three
times a week, 1 filled with the latent
newa of the country ant 1 well worth
the price asked for it.
The Practical Farmer, one year,
and the Middleburg Post, one year,
paid in advance, $1.50. Both of
the above papers and the Practical
Farmer Year Book and Agricul
tural Almanac lor 1900, paid in
advance, only $1.65.
The Practical Farmer Is one of the best
farm papers publiahed, issued weekly,
at 11.00 year. The year book contains
W0 page in whleh there la a fund of in
formation that la useful to the farmer.
The price of this book alone ia (0 cents,
snd the Tear Book foronly f l.U.
P.O.BOX 594
HARRISBURG.PA
CmtS ALL DwMK AMD DwU AoDICT lOMSJ
NtS MAMAtHntHT,
n 11
LflaJ 111
71 kH HS
msm
Biahop Potter's recent address on
the luat for riches and the way of
The Win.. 4 m of tnf
wealthy has bMO
w.-nitu. , , ,
a o widely p u b-
liahed aa to et all Americana to
contemplating anew the mone -'.uden
oUkM thut uuy nuiii buspects and
oritioiMs until he chances to be
come a member of it. The contem
plation will do BO hnrru in the long
run, but, contrariwise, much good,
for it is impossible not to see much
in wealth besides a tendency to lux
ury and ostentation, says a writer In
the Saturday Evening Potrt, A lift
of the rich men of any city, coun
try or state will show thut many
of the wealthy, even a majority, live
plainly, and are no more self-indulgent
than Home of tneir neighbors
who live so closely from hand to
mouth that frequently the hand
strays into other men's pockets and
bank accounts. Dealers in chnm
pagn and terrapin, diamonds, fine
yachts and fast horses would tum
ble into the pit of insolvency were
they to depend on the put run age of
men really wealthy. Aside from all
this, riches have some ways of their
own that are peculiarly significant.
From the grand old book which tells
ua that "the love of money Is the
root of all evil," we learn also that
the fool and hil money ure soon purt
ed. and that riches have wings. Th
world lias deduced from its own ob
servation the saving that any fool
can make money, but only a wise man
can keep at. To have his swing in
Wall street ii the consuming desire
of every man with the money-craze
in his blood and brain, yet most of
the "ex-kinga of Wall atreet" die.!
Hxr unless) they had other sources
of iuconie; their living tuoeeaaori
dare not try to retire by Converting
their holding into cash. Outside of
Wall street the finul experiences of
thousands of envied men have been
similnrly bad; un ex-millionaire, once
supposed to be the shrewdest of the
shrewd, is keeping a cheap restau
rant in Uoston, another is an object
of charity in Chicago, and many mon
etary meteors to whose names
"Lucky" was prefixed s few year
ago would exchange all their luck
that remains for a permanent assur
ance against the wolf at the door.
To "hitch your wagon to a star" may
be as laudable in finance as in any
other business, but the higher and
more rapid the star the more disas
trous the drop when anything
chances to break, as things often do
when a ton or more of gold is strain
ing at them, and wuen there is no
better mending material at band
than several pounds of overused gray
matter in an overconfident head. It
is to be hoped that wealth, us ull of
us yearn to make it our own, will
in time find a way in which to work
out its own ml vat ion ; meanwhile we
must admit that in past days it has
done the other thing with a persist
ency that is full of warning,
A female doctor and doctrinaire
comes out in a shrill manner against
the practice of
kissing1, arid as
serts that it is
The Kabld Antl-Klaas-ra.
worse than the liquor habit, and
more inddloiia than poppy, mandra
gora, henbane or any of the insane
roots that take the reason prisoner.
Such theories are now and then
brought forward by ancient bomba
sine women in the courts and parlia
ments where such ideas are most dis
cussed, but they never find any con
siderable following, says the New
York Tribune. The sentiment and
usage of mankind in all land and
aps are against them, and they dip
their absurd paddles atrainst a stream
of tendency constant and potent as
the tides of air snd ocean. The
nnti-kissers, male or female, have no
standing in the court of public opin
ion, though everybody worth notic
ing is in favor of a judicious regula
tion of the practice.
The lnte l'hilip I. Armour was one
of the most remarkable men of his
time. Beginning, as did nine out of
every ten of the men who have con
trolled the great industrial, commer
cial or distributive activities of the
country In the past quarter of a cen
tury, at the foot of the ladder, he
climbed to the topmost round by his
own exertions, unaided by the influ
ence of anybody, either In the wo'rld of
business or in that of politics. His life,
like that of Henry Yillard and Marcus
Daly, who alio died recently, shows the
boundless possibilities of advancement
which America offer to courage, fore
tight and industry.
William Woolsey, a Maryland farm
er, has just died and left $50,000 to
his county to build' good roads with.
Here is an original suggestion and a
good one to wealthy testators who
are in search of something besides
colleges, libraries, hospitals and
churches on which to bestow their
riches.
Mrs. Hannah Laidla-w, of Fall River,
Mass., recently died of paralysis, due
to the fear that she hud swallowed
her false teeth. She had not done so,
and her death was consequently
caused by fright.
The crops raised in Iowa this season
will bring in f 102 for every man, wom
an and child in tha state.
" There ta a eertala absurdity abost
all balls, if one begins to analyze the
silly, forced con
versation one hears
ou every side, said
1 nip's Ides,
of Italia.
to try snd discover a reason for the
stereotyped smiles that are so far re
moved from mirth," remarked a cyn
ical olil bHchelor recently, according
to the New York Tribune. "1 always
think people at any dance look like
a collection of galvanized puppet,
but of all ridiculous, inane perform
ances, a private masked balf is the
worst! The silly, squeaky Toices that
are assumed to escape recognition,
the futile attempts at mystification
and the efforts to be playful are
really painful! The last function of
the kind I went to was too foolish for
anything, As I went into the room
a tail female figure came up to me,
a'.rd in a horrible falsetto demanded: 1
'Art thou my soul's elected?" 'So, I
am not thy soul's elected,' I answered,
nnl I then heard her ask the next
person the some ridiculous question.
1 found afterward that inane per
aonagf was a sensible mai 1 u wo Ul
an of my acquaintance, with a family
of young children.. Now, why do
ynu suppose she broke out in this
idiotic fashion? All through the even
ing it was the same thing the
squeaky voices, the forced attempts
to be coy and fascinating on the part
of the women, and a pretense of mys
tery that was absolutely childish.
'What are we all made of,' 1 said to
myself, 'that we should make fools
of ourselves like this?"
The crowded condition of the more
populous sections of large cities w
have been aecu-
llntnona Matilaf
tomed to view with
of Popal.tloa. a Mmn cf hor.
ror. The density of population in Lon
don, 1'uris, llcrlin and other cities of
the old world, i described in many
voluminous treatises respecting the
problem they present. But it is be
coming apparent that we are in dan
ger of like condition in our American
center. I have just seen, says Balling
ton Booth, In Sncceas, s chart ihowing
that in New York there is an sverage
of nearly 19 person to a dwelling. In
Hoboken, the average I bet ween 12 am!
13; in Fall Kiver, from 11 to 13; la Jer
sey City, Chicago snd Boaton, between
eight and nine. Thi chart represents
the ceniu ten year ago, snd, when one
take into consideration the number
of dwellings in which only two or three
prraon live, the average 1 much larger
and more aerious. The problem ha be
come almost universal, for, st the same
time (thanks to modern imprevcr-eut
and rapid transit), more fortunate
famille are grsvitsting to ths suburb.
The other, of course, les fortunate,
have to remain in the crowded and ever
crowding section. Manhattan' pres
ent sverag of dweller to a dwelling
i estimated to be 23 person, which is
simply ruinou from the standpoint of
guud health or of sound moral.
For the first time in the history of
our country the census report shows
that the center of population has failed
to move westward. For decade after
decade we found that the drift of our
population was toward the setting sun.
but some time during the last ten
J ears that human tide came to a stand
still snd then began to flow the other
way, and now the census enumerators
tiud the center of population on the
Miami river, a few mile north of Cin
cinnati, s little east, of where it was in
1H90, and not far from where It was in
1380. The marvelous growth of the
eastern cities and of their suburbs sc
count for this change, snd the pros
pects sre that it will continue for at
laaat another decade.
WHAT'S IN A NAME?
(Isntoi'i Pluttr it Paln'i Mittir.)
In the days of 'wild est' money in th
West, the Ames shovels wars tsssd a cur
rency. They were as stable ss gold ; their
price did not vary s cent is twenty year
Th vary name of Oliver Ams A Son, was
s synonym for honesty. It was current sll
over ths world.
On ths asm principl Benson's Porous
Plaster is the universal standard external
remedy. To say it is s "good" plaster doe
not describe it ; il M th bftt pouibU plotter.
For every disease in which an externsl rem
edy i available, Benaon' Plaster is used
almost as s matter of course.
Benson's Plaster quickly relieve snd
cars where other modes of treatment are
either eutsperatingly slow or have n good
effect whstvr. Cough, colds, lumbago,
kidney trouble, rheumatism, lame back,
eto. , sre at one benefited and soon cured.
Capsicum , Strengthening and Belladonna
plasters havs nons of ths ourstivs virtues
of Benson's. More then 6,000 physicians
and druggist hsvs commended Benson's
Flsster ss a remedy in which the publio
may have implicit confidence ; while, in s
compsrative test with other plasters, Ben
ion's has received flfty-flv higfiut cuemrdi.
Beware of substitute snd chssp imitations.
For sale by sll druggists or we will pre
pay postsge on any number ordered in the
United States on receipt of 35c. each.
Ssabury A Johnson, Mfg. Chemists, N.I.
WANTED !
Reliable man fur Manager oi
BranebOffice we wish to open in
this vicinity. If your record is O. K.
here is an opportunity. Kindly
give good reference when writing.
n. A. T-IMorrit Wholesale Honae,
I CINCINNATI, OHIO.
Illustrated catalogue 4 eta stamps.
1-17-1 2t.
isootj TroiiDles:
As the blood eontnins all the elements necessary to snstain life, it i impor
tant that it lie kept free of all impurities, or it becomes a source of disease,
poisoning instead of nourishing the liody, and loss of health ia sure to follow.
Some poisons enter the Mood front .vitlnut, through the skin by absorption, or
inoculation ; others from within. ;u when waste products accumulate in the
aystem and ferme-.it, allowing disease germi to develop snd be taken into the
circulation. While all bluml troubles have one common origin, each has some
peculiarity to distinguish it tiotn the other. Contagious Wood Poison, N.'rofula,
Cancer, Rheumatism, lier.ema and other blood diseases can be distinguished bv
a certain sore, ulcer, eruption or iurleinmation
disease show sooner or later on the outside and ou the weakest part of the ImhIv. or where it finds the least resistance
Many mistake the sore or outwsrd sign for the reU disease, and attempt a cure bv the use of salves, liniments and othes
external applications. Valuable time i lost and no permanent benefit derived from such treatment.
BLOOD TROUBLES REQUIRE BLOOO REMEDIES; the poison must be completely and perms.
nently eradicated the blood reinforced, purified and cleansed, or the disease goes deeper and saps the very life. Mercury,
potash and arsenic, the treatment usually presented in this class of diseases, sre violent poisons, even when taken in umalf
dose never cure, but do much harm by sddiug anotheT poison lo the already overburdened, diseased blood.
4W
or any similar blood trouble, write them fully for advice about vour case All o rrespondence is conducted in stm-test confi
dence. Ws make no charge for tins service. Book on blood and akin disease free. SWIFT SPECIFIC CO., Atlanta. 6a.
Amethysts ire widely distributed in
the United State, being found in New
England, in the Lnke Superior region,
in Virginia nd North Carolina, in
tieorgia and several of the western
mining states. Sum specimen dis
covered in Connecticut rinil in color
and luster the best variety of the ori
ental gem.
There 1 nothing in a name, Ji the
Memphis Commercial-Appeal. The
citizens of Quntown, Miss... according
to the Quntown Hoi Times, diicovered
sume burglan in n store robbing a safe
the other night, but they dared not cu
ter, aa none of them hud a gun.
When American smiles were in
Cuba the island was almost depleted
of cattle, u vast number of tflie animals
having been killed for food. Now the
ranchmen and farmers are busy
stocking up again and have made
heavy draft on Florida.
A student ut Richmond (Yn.) . o lege
secured a large und trusty revolver,
showed it to the upper classmen and
assured them that he wns going to
sleep with it under his pillow every
night. So far his slumbers have not
bern disturbed,
Only 50 J ears ago but one woman
worked to every ten men. At present
the ratio is one to four. Thirty year
ago two-thirds of all the self-support-lag
women were domestic servant.
To-day only one-third are so em
ployed. With over "S.OuO.OOO population in
this country California stands isolat
ed, with only 1,600,000 of population,
but producing in many lines sufficient
for lt)0,OUU,000 consumers.
Favored among nations and rick be
yond the dream of avarice, this coun-
Importance of th suddejily
leaped to the frou-t
Americas Hen.
aa a world power
with the strength of sj arbiter, snd
the material forces that make her a
controller of politica ss well a the
chief base of human supplier). We
thought it glory enough to sell our
steel, our iron, our coal, our lumber.
lour suit, our machinery and our
enormous list of agricultural prod
ucts abroad, but now there is another
proud feather in our cap, sayn the
Detroit Free Press. Honest pride
does not drop s single peg because
this latent feather happens to be a
hen feather. Among th many sedi
tious and mutinous elements in Ger
many are the native and acclimated
hens. They have king been on a
strike and absolutely refuse to do
anything1 like their reasonable stunt
ut producing eggs. It is not known
whether they are crosswise with the
emperor, the reichstag, the aris
tocracy, the socialists or the agrar
ians, but they won't Iny eggs at any
price, and only cackle crossly at any
advances looking to compromise or
arbitration. At recurring intervals
they will solemnly try to reproduce
their kind by sitting on door knobs
r frozen potatoes, but when the peo
ple want eggs they must be brought
from Hungary. It was this emer
gency that sent Count luekler to
America and enlisted the sympathy
f Baron Hermann, of the German
embassy. They explored barnyards
and chicken coops on this side until
they reached a unanimous conclusion
that the pick of the American hens
are by odds the best of their species,
and that Germany needs them. Both
of these blue-blooded gentlemen are
enthusiastic agriculturists of the
scientific type, and learned among tha
rudiment that a good thing is not to
be hod by wishing for It. So, after
studying the Americnn hen and the
American methods of caring for the
poultry, they acted. Now the count
is on his way to Germany and on the
same ship under his watchful super
vision are scores of clucking chickens
that are destined to do and die in
the Fatherland. Whether they will
forswear allegiance and settle down
ss sober and industrious subjects of
tha kaiser remains to be seen. They
belong to good, steady families, the
count and the baron having selected
Plymouth Rocks and Wyandottes, but
there fa a bleating atmosphere of un
rest in Germany, and there is no tell-
appearing 011 the skin. Kverv blood
S. B. S. Nature s own remedy, mail rti root and herna attack tne disease m
the blood, antidote.' ard. forces out all impurities, makes weak, thin blood rich, strung
and healthv, and at the same lime build Up the general health. S. S S, is the only
purely vegetable blood purifier known, and the only one that can reach deep-seatexl
blood troubles. A record of 50 venis of successful cure proves n to lie a reliable,
unfailing specific for all blood and -kin trouble.
From Modloml Traatmmnt, Our Medical letnrtmnt is in charge of
skilled physician, who hsve nude blood and skin diseases 1 life study, so if yotl ttstvo
Contasious Blood Poison. Cancer, Scrofula, Rheumatism, Eczema, an lid Sore or Ulcer,
The use of the title "Hon." ws never
more comm"n in New York thnn it is
todav.
It is placed
HUnae of the Till
looallo.,
si a prefix to tha
name
of everv'" I" .-
officeholder at every ward politicians'
ball, and in this respect it probably
serve a purpose in distinguishing
those who draw the money from the
city treasury from those who put It in.
There is no law for the use of the title
Hon." in this country, and any ehar-
icter that custom may have given It in
the paat has been so abused as to make
it ridiculous and useless, truly observes
the Brooklyn Times. The title belongs
distinctively to England, and is llxed
there bv law. and a one of the rights
wf the reigning sovereign, aud why
Americans should ape it passes beyond
comprehension. The younger sons of
an earl and the sobs and daughters of
a viscount er s marquis are entitled to
be called honorabLe In England, and
so arc member of the cabinet, but or
dinary members of parliament may uot
use the title, though parliament as s
whole is su honorable body, and In ths
course of debate a member il the hon-
orsble member, instead of being the
gentleman from so-and-so, as in the
Cnited Stte congress. The title of
"Hon." in the United States i simply
'
twaddle and toadying. It baa no place
in the ethic of the United States. It
ahould go. I'lain "Mr." I good enough
for auy American citizen.
Kccentricities of genius do nnt hVur
verj largely in Mr. Howells' recent
reminiscences of our great writers of
the last generation. There i no com
fort in his book for Billy young men
who try lo excuse their own lapses
from decency bj the examples of Byron
and PoS! for Mr. Howells shows that
our foremost Americans were clean
living as well as high thinking citizen.
The possession of genius doe not con
fer exemptions; it imposes weightier
responsibilities.
A Dayton (().) mnn claims that he
has conquered consumption by lead
ing a nomadic life. Twenty years ago
his doctor told him he could not live
six months. Then he s-t out to roam
over the country. After all thess
years of Wandering ha claims to bs
cored and has returned to his home.
Homicides in this country during
the year 1900 foot up sV-7.1, au increase
over the previous year of no less than
2,050. This docs not quite beat the rec
ord, but it comes very close to it.
Thpre are about 8,000 libraries scat
tered over the United Stales, including
one at Tampa, with books in the Span
ish language endowed by Queen Chris
tins of Spain.
A prisoner who had been discharged
by the judge ut l'ine llliiff, Ark., was
ungrateful enough to tak the judge's
umbrella with him wheel he left.
He Wanted Riprrlrac.
The girl was very rich and the mini
was poor, but honest. She liked him.
but that was all, and he knew It, One
night he had been a little more tender
than usual.
"You art very rich?" he ventured.
"Yes," she replied, frankly, "i am
worth 11,150,000."
"And I am poor."
"Yes."
"Will you marry mef
"No."
"I thought ynu wouldn't."
"Then why did you nsk n.e?"
"Oh. just to see how a man feels when
he loses 11,250,000." Stray Stories.
You Get
the Profits
Undsr our plsn of selllnf earrlaRet, iug
2E?.d na&jfOStjSs pro. 1 The lob-
He. SOM
bar aim reianer are cuu
AS Price, VsS.30. '
with leather
QsartattoB.
wnn tne manuiacvunir.juii av- -.","
. making with a moderate profit added, M A you
... - .
laae your cnoioa iron
rolMst assortment,
Sellins
- -
unarm satanaeuon
laned. uur
DtaUiKeu sftUU
UODBOr
THE
Cancer,
Scrofula,
Old Soros,
Rheumatism,
Contagious
Blood Poison,
Chronic UlcerSm
The iooil Mnn'a Jnk.
Two gentlemen of the cloth w
standing on a comer yesterday. X
ueutjy tliey were talking about tnee
tT "erelcea to be held during thi
i BUticipate a gnat awaKening m
my church," said the lirat speaker
"My people never go to sleep," sun.'
the second.
"h, there comes; my car." repliei'.
tie first, and Ihej parted compan)
Albany Journal,
,.,,
, i,nUeratand it." rr
elalmcd flic bnehelor girl. "You atfel
I so cents to the rent of this room situ
pu because of my sex."
1 "Certainly," replied the landlady,
. "' ' 'r the extra gas."
"The extra gas!"
"Yes. If 1 rent it to n man, he burnai
gjis only in the evening; he does no
crimp his hair twice a day." Chicago
iosl
Cumpn rtanna.
"What is the meaning of the sayirg
'comparisons are odious?'" asked the
youngster.
"It mean," replied Mr. Cumrox.
"that It Is very bad form to slmultane
tnislv call attention to a mini's stand
( ing with the mercantile agencies anc!
! his ratings on the tax collector'
j book."-Washington Star.
" ...
i Preferred lo Walt,
Jhfy fag 0f Q baby that
hll q'uiu enraptured her.
j "Isn't he just sweet enough tr
i kiss?" she asked.
Not yet," he rrplnd, thoughtless-
lyi "not by about If. or 17 your
Later he had occasion to regrer,
this, One' wife is so unreasonable;
at Un'. Chicago Tost.
A Safe Job.
Jone.- If onr Doy won't study,,
why don't you send him out to work'"
I 'ham I in. an 1 want to keep hint'
at home iih long as posi
Iblet
I'ii.
ufrairl of bis becoming fust.
Jones -If you're afraid of that, why
not start him out as a messenger
boy'.' Philadelphia Press,
Profound LOSTlS.
Mutt Ain't it funny dat a man'ss
brains am In his head, but his sense unn,
in his neck?
l'ete- How yo' make dat out?
Mose Why, ef yo' want to knock
man senseless o" have to hit him it
de neck. Judge.
Aluioef nn Angel.
"Moft ingratiating man I ever
knew," said the former acquaintance
of the deceased. "Why. that fellow
could w heel a baby buggy along I he
sidewalk during a street parade and
get nothing but smiles."- Indianapolis,
i'ress.
I.lTe ii ml l.et Lire.
Customer (in barber's chair) 8s
you haven't heard Herr Yon Thumper,
the world-famed pianist?
German Barber- Nein. Dose blan
ists neffer batronize me, nn' so 1 net
fer batronize dem. Tit-Bits.
Al S It. nil lidi r
Rivers- I wish I could remember
what I tied that knot ill this handker
chief for.
Brooks Perhaps to conceal the ini
tials in the corner, 1 lost one like it
the other day.- Chicago Tribune.
Such n I'linr NeluhborhiMxt.
Mrs. A Are you troubled much in
your neighborhood with borrowing?
Mrs. II (innocently)- Ves, a good
deal. My neighbors don't seem to have
anything I want. -Stray Storii
s. l.- n i itte Train.
"Do you know that colors affect one'si
spirit s?"
"Of course: when I buy a blue neck
tie at night and it turns out to be crreem
I get hopping mad - Chicago Kecord.
out. uj
.. ...... ,,,,11. Ill CIIHO
mo vw"
uur piu
Carriages Direct
Ka,. Ifvnn are dkaaal
im '"""w . "T"T. T htn,
oompi m -i1 m . i-fcia
oune asjuiptuwiiwi "
PsVCsD, nuuisju irvn.
COLUMBUS CARRIAGE AND HARNESS CO..
BOI 772. wraM. WW-
Sfa-USa l:
V 8inl Strap
Bor
X llarnene. Ml