The Eminent Kidney and Bladder Specialist. V CI I 'iwiVIJ ' bLV-Lil Tie DUcoverer of Swamp-Root at Work ln Bit Laboratory. j There is a disease prevailing in this I country most dangerous because so decep- " Mnn.r i I . . n .i ok. 1 I lit heart disease, pneumonia, heart failure live. mMM su6'i Urania die L-lUifU DV lor apoplexy are often the result of kidney I disease. If kidney trouble is allowed to d- vance the kidney-poisoned blood will attack Ihe vital organs, or the kidneys themselves, break down and waste away cell by cell. Then the richness of the blood the albumen -leaks out and the sufferer has Bright's disease, the worst form of kidnev trouble. ' Dr. Kilmer's Swamp. Root the new dis- bovery is the true specific for kidney, bladder knd urinary troubles. It has cured thousands lof apparently hopeless cases, after all other efforts have failed. At druggists in fifty-cent i and do liar sues a sample bottle sent free fcy mail, also a book telling about Swamp- If... --j i.. J..1..I - - t v Kooi anu us woiiuunui cures. Aaaress l Dr. Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y. and nention this paper. ocwMcvi uTmia . ... , BunDury v uewtstown uiviBion. In effect Kov. '!", 1900. Irrwaso. 1 stations. sAsrwasn AM AM r M 9 7 Bunbury W30 antl limT Belinsgrove Junction BOB 41)0 10 IS tselinsirrove OOt t l'i mil Pawling 8 50 tea iom Krearaer s i i ai Hi 37 Metier 1 10 I -f lOltl Mi. I' M. 'nil K H H i 1o:im Benfer m m i in 10 to Beavertown n ft 4ir?i loftl Adanubtira B 310 4 01 liis; Haulm Hills S 18 888 11 it) McC'lure B 117 8 19 i 111:1 Wagner ;?7 sao s 11 l Bhlndle 7 51 3M 0 11 21 1'iiiiiUrville 7 lit s;ui 6 1127 Maitlanil 7 4:i 834 5 11.15 l.cniKtou n I 7 5 8 15 j 7 11 37 I.ewtt.wn (Main Street. , 7 33 8 13 0 1140 Lewistowa Junction. ' 7 to a 10 ! bain leavnH Hunbury -r 80 r iu, ar rives at !"eluiHrove 5 , n m B8ve8SelinHKrove(!:(Hip. n, arrives at duo bur v B:I6 p hi. raius leave Lewintown Junction : ! I m, 10 I in. 1 10 p m, i:iiiii m R -."2n m. 7 07n k 1? 02 a oi for Alloona, PltiHlmrn nn.1 the Ww. (nr HSItimiire unit Wiml.iiiKtiin sin ui n;io. K.1.13 4 33 R 10 n m Forl'lillmli-lphiii iiml New Drk 5 5s, 8 0"), 0 80 A m, I Oi 1 33 4 33 unil 11 1 i I rnr rtarniinurK s iu i :a Philadelphia & Ene R R Division. AND NORTHBBNd'KNTKAI. KA1LWAY WtttWABO, rraln lnav s ill strove Junction daliv lor lubniy and Wost. liam, 158 p m, 5 3 p in. s mday 9 ' a m, I p m. ds leave Sonbury ilally except SundiiT: II am for H fT.ilo. Krie and CananiUiirun 110 mn ior llellelonte Krlennd Cuimiidaticiia mm am for Look Haven. Tyrone and the weal, BIO p m tor neilelonte halt' Tyrone and tlanar.- I H llfUH 5p in for kennvn and Kl in ir 1 p Di tur n luiatnspuit andaT 1 -21 a HI for Bun" do via Emporium, 5 to u iur i .i ir ami v;.tniiiiiiiiiKita lam forUick Haven an.i H 6.1 p in lor i Imipurl Jam, I SB a n) 3 00 and 5 48 pm tor wllkea rr. and Ha.ellon I a ui. lo 10 a in, '2 05 p in, 5 45 P in Iur Shiuno- I and Mniint (Tarinul andaj' 9 55 a m lor Wllkebarre BAST WARD, rrslni leave BetluaTovs Junotlon W a in, dally arrlvtnir nt I'lnl idelnhbi an New York 868 p m Baltimore 8 11 p m hlnKturi 4 10 p in i p m aaiiy arnvinr at miadeipnia l!inilon"or S S B,im,"oro 9 ,n Bp in. ually arrM,, hi Phlladelpbla ; end of a century to certain public ob t m, Naw York 718 a m, Baltimore 3 30 a m I . 1 unflon4 0Bam r,itM,iMvUrrivi..iM.ou.i.i'.i',., ,... 1 ruHH il so Iailva Stlnluirv Wmora 1 8 a m WHhlnjrton 746 am New mn warn wasusji, iii us a m Bundayn, i mi p m week dv arriving at I'hllaih-liiliia dan. V! VZ2 . I WMiiinlrton i oo V Si u'"wu" "3! H pin, week day arrivlnv ai Philadelphia j I .. r, i.i. i in, DBHUUOru OUjpiU iblrifttou T lsp in fains alo leave Snnhury at 9 so a in iml 8 35 ii ph., lor uiirrisiiura. riiiluiluliiliia and nore I. K. Will III. Oan'l Pmrnm ,.,., IDT0BTNROB ln'l Manaaar. COMBINATION WITH THE POST. pVc give Ik'Iow some dubbins nbinatiooa with the Post. The les iuotHl are very low. Erbe New York Tri-Weekly Tri- ne and the Middleburg Post, one r, paid in advance, only $1.75. I ine i n-weekly is puhllshed Monilay, Wadnsada and Friday, reaches a lnrir.. ,iroHirtion of ubserll)erH on il.it.- ot SSUa, anil Mflll wlllinn ! ,. ........,.,,1,1.. ap-lo lte daily (amlly newapapcr (or ""J people. rhe New York Weekly Tribune the Middleburg Post, one year, in advance, only $1.25 The Weekly Tribune In published on rtUlrHllllV. mill tflvim all l....u.ru..t ......... P' nation and world, the omit ,ii,.i.i.. Piurket report, unexcelled aKrlculttiral PSIIUanl reliable a-eneral I II flint);.. i" nnd choice and entertaining rrls tellany. It U Ihe ' people's aper" for ne entire United Htatcs, a national fam ily paper for farmers and villagers. he New York Tri-Weekly World I the Middleburg Post, one year, in advance, ouly $1.65. The Trl-Weeklv World enme t1r Bas a week. Is rlllxl with n,.. lwi of the country and ia well worth c price aaced for II. fie Practical Farmer, one year. ine Middleburg f 06T, one year, in advance, 11.60. IJoth of aUive papers and the Practical tier Year Bock and Agricul- Almanac lor 1900, paid in ice, only $1.05. I The Practical Farmer is one of the best r.M" Pers puDIMDed, Issued weekly, Ul. 00 year. The year book contains H Paoea In which them ! i n.i n . Sanation I halls useful to the far ln rRncio,",ls,oo,rnnnels50 cer. I the Year Book foronly tl.69. ante. In a recent isme of London Hlucs and White we find the following! "ll I s exl raort Inary What a ii) a ! I am nut of interest 41 f 1 . aroused by the mighty political earn paiya In the United States. Theordi- ' "'V ''w,'"er excltingcouutrles ,,i,s l)U' hopelessly Inadequate notii n "' ''u' upheaval tint these presidential , election involve. The Industry of the whole vast nation cornea to a standstill for months; meetings are packed with tens of thousands of respectable peo I pie. who listen for an hour in a perfect I ly orderly fashion an.! with the keenest merest to a political address; gigan- pro t ssiotis, whose nuinliers run '",0 slx figures, pass through serried ranks of respectful onlookers. Everv- thing, in fact, is dune on a Qorrantuan vim ii In vr.;t.. tl... of t he popu '' anurousetnen tever ueatofen- 'husiasm; yet there Is never scarcely a hreach of the peace or a discreditable dlaolav of barti . i ,i .... ., . . , ' ' ;'"" " to ue most eas- "J moved. It i a Wouderful instance of iho curious con: rnsl in the imerlnnn ,,inr. ,.;,.,,,, , , ,. , K 1 il,un8 directly concerning the iudi- rlouaI, and absolutely lethargic aboul things with which he has no persona connection. Thcv vote by the million ,, , ,- uo u,,mon' "Ul thev do nol u bi ti.. .. ;n ..... " ""(.' Blowing excited over it. So thej vote calmly. If we were to have the game atics i this country ul tin elec- ,KI" c should have a civil war. Thl is may be t rue in I In- main, hut that there are times when the lawless element is in evidence Is equal!; true. Numerous instances of vicious parti sanship were recorded during the re cent presidential campaign in various parts of the country and an occasional broken head was the result. Still we may justly claim to lie a reasonable and orderly people in our elections, nation al u mi local. rhere is something so manly nnd lovable ahoiit .Mark Twain that every- An llinirable Iliiinorlat. ooay win beartilj indorse what is said of him h David F. St. Cluir in Success: "Mr. Clemenssays he went around the world to satisfy li is conscience. The great humorist has, however. alTorded an in spirational example to all his debt-ridden countrymen. Doubtless many of j them, when he had paid his debts, bavt been incited to pay theirs, rather than go through bankruptcy. They are sat isfied that the Twain method of wiping out old scores is ii good one. First, we simply laughed at I wain's jokes. Then we uiseovered that they are literature. Next we learned, against our will, that the humorist is something else a se rious soul, who does not love the laugh ter he provokes. And at leng-th th humorist turns out to be the most strik ing example of honesty in the country a quality that the world has tried to deny to all jokers. Here is a man who ean exemplify his country's gift of hu mor and its honor at the same time." When Benjamin Franklin died in 171K) he left $;.,i(io each to the cities of Boston and Philadelphia, to be keol . 1 1 nm-sieu iur n perum oi iuu years, ana tbe entire accumulation devoted at the jecia. now great, a otnerence mere . , n . , . nn ue in ii ha ue ia i manaffemeat is shown by the tact that the Boston fund , .iiiiiuoiis in ni,.ss uno ln;n oi rhiiadeiihia to lmt little over $100,000. Boston has decided to spend the money !., , t tl if ,-i i for a branch of the public library, ti be called the Franklin institute, espe cially used for classes nnd lectures in history and science and for instruction In applied arts nnd mechanics. Phila delphia will turn over its Franklin fund to the park commissioners for un art gallery. Music will be a prominent feature in the Pan-American exposition, to be held in Buffalo next year from May l to November 1. The Temple of Music, a free treatment of Spanish renais sance architecture, is octagonal in form with pavilions ut the cornem, n. dome 13ti feet high und seating capacity for L'.DUO persons. A $10,000 organ is to be constructed in the building and two recitals will be given daily. The saen gerfest of the North American sanger bund will open in Buffalo June 24, and the choruses will be among the larg est ever seen in this country. Lovers of music in UulTuIo have formed a com pany with a oapital of $40,000, divided into 1,000 share ut each share en titling the holder to two season tickets to the saengerfest, The expedient of allowing a carrier pigeon, alleged to have been stolen, to fly away from the court in order that its home might be known, wan adopted- in Kast Orange, X. J the other day, with such success that George Uennett was held for the grand jury on a charge of larceny. He had been accused of stealing game cocks and a homing pigeon from Kob ert Euraig, but the evidence was so conflicting that it was decided to send the pigeon out and see where it went. Shortly after it had been released the dove was found in Kuraig's loft. A Sharon (1'a.) pustor on a recent Sunday cut his sermon short and dis missed the congregation because cer tain members habitually slept during his discourse. He then handed in his resignatioa. The national irrigation congress, which was in session in Chicago re Irrlu.-iilnn for Arid Mat, cently, is to make another appeal to canirresa at the pre-. nt SetHion to take up this ditli eult irrigation problem, though the outlook for action is not very hope ful. At the last ,.-vi,,n llOOVOOO was appropriated for the purpose of mak .ng surveys of water sources, which is regarded as a stepping stone for further action bj congress. Hut that does not necessari.y follow. Congress took action to set aside reservoir sites several years ago. hut that was not followed up. ln fact, a strong and partly successful effort was made by western men to undo what had lit en I :.. .!. .1: . ,n. , uu in iiuii nil f( i uni. inis. very truly says the Philadelphia l'res. is n gnat problem and must be care fully considered. Secretary Hitch cock, in his last annual report, esti mated that the arid land of the wist, if properly reclaimed, would support a population of no less than SO,O0O, hm. Other reports say that with ir rigation the wa-le lands v. . '.! I . worth at least 1300,000,000, It is gen erally conceded that these lands ought to be reclaimed. But ii will be a "-:',v undertaking, and perhaps only the government can undertake it. Moreover, the longer the work i- de layed the more difllcult it. will In- to do, li -cause private interests are ab sorbing so much of the water supply. The alternative proposition is for the government to deed to Ihc various suites nil the arid public lands with in their respective borders, and to grant to them the um- of such reser voir sii,.s, water ami forest reserva tions as shall be necessary to reclaim the waste districts. This meets with opposition, but it seems the most feasible plan. There is no doubt that if the work could Ue carried out by the government on business principles and the reclaimed land sold for Its :t',w it Would be a paying invest ment. Hut we fear that the lminos feat lire of it. would soon disappear, if it- ever existed from the start. Con gress is too much given to legislation for short hours, lug pay, long vaca tions, and other things of that kind to make any government work pay. And so it would he with the reclaimed arid lands. If, by the expenditure of enormous millions of dollars, the gov ernment once reclaimed the waste lands a bill would probably be rushed through giving them away. I'n.ler the circumstances it would he much belter for the states, under proper restrictions, to be allowed to do t lu work. Hut there will he difficulty about the reservoirs and' water sup plies which in many cases will in volve the rights of more than, one State. Hence it is not an easy prob lem, but it is n very important one, and should be solved us early us pos sible. In an address before the Educational alliance in New York a few nights age lion. Allium S. Hewitt predicted that in the coming century "the spirit of com mercialism will steadily grow less strong and the spirit of altruism stronger. 1 believe that the rule do unto others as you would have others do unto you will more generally pre vail than in all the centuries which have gone before." Mr. Hewitt also said in his study of future sociology: -'A school is better than a jail; a college i. beter than a state prison. Every dol lar spent in education is a dollar saved. When it is not spent for education it has to be doled out for police expendi ture." Much food for thought in these few sentences. In a Washing-ton building there is an elevator man who seems to be perfec tion ill affability, and the way he makes people happy has often been the sub ject of comment. An instance of this follows! A few days ago a lady ap proached him und after getting in his car thus addressed him: "I want to bee u man whose name 1 do not know, and I do not know, either, what of fice he is employed in." "1 am well acquainted with the gentleman you re fer to," wus the. instant reply of 1 he elevator man, "and he has just stepped out." The lady left the cur seemingly entirely satisfied with the information slie hud received An authority on bacteriology says that many diseases mav be traced to the eating of unwashed fruit, and, par ticularly of unwashed grapes. After washing some grapes which had stood for a long time in a basket on a fruit stand the man of science found that the water contained tubercle bacilli iu sufficient quantities to kill a guinea pig in two days. Two other guinea pigs which were inoculated with the germ-infected water died within six weeks. Watermelons of northern growth may be enjoyed in winter by following the plan adopted by "l.'ncle Mike" Mor ris, a farmer living near Stanhope, la. Last summer he selected a number of ehoicc melons and put them in a cave, after sealing the stems with wax. Lust week he cut one and found it as fresh ind crisp as though it had just been taken from the vine. All this is vouched by a local paper. Some statistician discovers that the average woman carries 40 to 60 miles of hair on her head. Ms- A Spnr---- CATARRH IS A CONSTITUTECftAL OR BLOOD DISEASE, and f ir beyond the reach of mere local remedies. Those who rely upon them for a cure lose valital le time, inert with disap pointment and allow the disease to take firmer hold. Onlv a real blood lemcdy can reach this troublesome and dangen i eusi . S. S. S cures Catarrh because it lirst cleanses and builds up the blood, purifies it, makes it rich and healthy, stimulate! audi puts new life into the sluggish wot n -out organs, and thus relieves the system of all poisonous accumulations. Mr Josephine Polhtll, of Due We-.t. S. C . writes r " I had Catarrh, which became ileep sestr.i that 1 wns entirely ile.if in one rnr, an.l sit uihiile of my no-e, Including lsitt t the t-,.ne, fciotigheil uff. when itie iiiseu-e had (one tins fat the fhyafcisn Mvr mc up i - incurable, i determined to try 8 s s us last resort, snd begsn to improve st once. It seemed to get at the sestot the disease, and after a few weeks' ueuitnciit l was entirely cured, snd fur more ihun seven years have hu.l iiu sign of the disease." S. S. S. is made of roots, herbs and barks of wonderful tonical and purifying properties, It is the only vegetable blood purifier known, and a certain and safe cure for all blood troubles, Send for out book on Hh4 and Skin I liseases, and at the same lime write our physicians about your case. They will cheerfully yive you any inf nnation or advice wanted. We make no charge for this. The question as to the recognition J which cigarettes are entitled under I fun rcl 1 n n il lie law was con sul n 0 oy I lie I nu rd Stales supreme the I. il it. rourt recently in an opinion rendered .11 the ease of llllnm H. Alls ;-S)ii v-. I'fie case the stale of Pennsylvania. I iriginated in tin- state of Tennessee, ami it called into question the valid ity of the stale law regulating the sale of this article of commerce on the ground that it. was an Infringement of the right of congress to regulate interstate commerce, savs tin- Wash ington Star. The Tennessee supreme court upheld the law, and Ihe decision sustained that verdict, though nol without disapproval of some of the po sitions taken, und then upon a very narrow margin, four out of nine mem bers joining' in a dissent ng opinion and another member of the court (Justice White) placing-his assent upon grounds different from those announced by .lus liee Brown, w ho handed down t he opin ion. The Tennessee court had held that cigarettes are nol an article of commerce. With this view Justice Brown took issue, and he delivered ulte n dissertation upon the subject. Whatever is an object of barter and sale is, he said, an article of commerce, and must be so recognised. Tobacco had been such an article for 400 years. It had been made the subject of taxation, and, indeed, had become more widely .scattered than tiny other vegetable. Probably, he added, no other vegetable has contributed so much to the com fort and solace of the human rnee. This being the case, it was entirely beyond the bounds to say that tobacco was not an article of commerce. He then took notice of the claim that cigar el tes are an especially harmful form of tobacco, and while he conceded that this might be the ease, he remarked that i li i si claim was of comparatively recent origin. Still, he held that cig arettes are as much a subject of stale regulation as is liquor, and he further held that while no st ate law could pro hibit importation in original packages it was entirely competent for a legis lature to regulate the sale 1 ause of the original belief in Ihe deleterious effect of the article, There wasa dis senting opinion of Justice Shiras, in which the chief justice and .IllMice Brewer and Peckhara joined. They based their dissent upon the theory that congress has exclusive control of Interstate commerce. As the national census and a general election came together in the year 1 Kt, it is easy to obtain the true ratio be hween 1he population and the number of voters. The total registration in St. Louis for the recent election was 136, 640, and the official census population is 575,238, The ratio is one registered voter to 4J0 inhabitants. But the actual vote- of St. Louis was 124,037, the number registered but not voting reaching n.712. The ratio of the actual votes to population in St. Louis was 4.V. Missouri's total vote was 683,635, and its population by the census of 1MK) is 3,106,665. The ratio of voters MAYDOLE'S HAMMER. (Benson's Plaster Is Pain's Master.) When Maydole was told that he made "a pretty good hummer," he said, "No, I don't make a 'pretty good hammer,' I make the best hummer that ever van mode." Every curpentcr who saw a Maydole hnm mer wanted ona. It was of the best ma terial, perfectly balanced, snd the head never flew off. Hammers were divided into two classes 1st, Maydole's; 2d, all the rest. Plasters aro separated in the siunu line of cloavagej 1st, Benson's Porous Plaster; 2d, all the rest. When, for rheumatic pain, a cold, a cough, kidney trouble or any other disease or uiltneut that may be treated externally, you ask for a plaster, any hon est, reputable druggist will give you s Ben sou's. He knotc it ia incomparably the best, and hs assumes that you know it too. As the name of Mnydolo stood for hammers the name of lieuson stands for plasters tho "real thing." All the medicinal poten cies that ore valuable in a plaster sre in Benson's. Capsicum, Strengthening and Belladonna plasters are ont of date. An army of physicians and druggists, and millions of the people, have written of Benson's Plasters as o remedy to be trusted. Benson's Plasters have fifty-five highut award. Accept no substitute. For sale by all druggists, or we will pre pay postage on any number ordered in the United States, on receipt of 25o. each. Sesbury A Johnson, Mfg. Chemists. K.J. o FORERUNNER OF o CONSUMPTION Few realize wbst a deep Stated, obstinate disease Catarrh is, regarding it as a simple inflammation of the no-e and throat, little or no attention is given it. Hut, however insignificant it may set Bl al first, it IS serious sad far-reaching in its results. The foul secretions entering the circulation tnjison the entire system. The stomach, kidm -. in fvt all the org.iua feel the effect of this catarrhal poison, and when the lungs air readied its is r:pitl ami destructive, and finally ends in consumption. ll frequently happens that the senses of hearing and smell ate in part or entirely lost, the s ! tl noncsci the nose eaten into and destroyed, causing intense Buffering ui'! greatlj disfiguring tin- face, Whili aysy washes and salves may give temporal v relief, no permanent U in fit can he expected from such treat lent to pnpulntii general the India nupolii i in this st a;,, is ratio varies cons reports a ratio 1.54. In h rnbly. of 3.71, St. I':, i HI an llostou I Thai of ited is 5,jh, New York t Chicago is I Halt Ituore's la rire cl i lea as coilsolii I'hilndt Ipli a s. in 4.5(1 I he UVl IS Lorney I.. Sail, y, a 7 -,v - ar old tret eran of ihe civil war living tit Prec port, Iml.. received a pi nsion of .u'.'i per month and npplli d fur an in- crease to $40, There ulnrity in his affaire discovered when his considered. The resit e w lis some Irn g- atltl t his w i iv application wa it was that his entire pension was taken nwav The old man brooded over the matter and began lo fail rapidly, Hi absolutely refused all food fur Weeks, and died on Thankrgiving dny, Judge t'liiTonl Smith, of Cedar Falls, la., holds- that good citizi ns are needed more in this country tliaii mere voters. Therefore he refused lo giant nam rallzation papers to several foreigners whocatne before him because thej were unable to understand some simple ques tions which lie put to tin in. None of them could either nail or write Eng lish, and the judge told them that he did not think they were ns yet ready for cit Izenshlp, A young-woman of Saco, Mc. recently purchased a pretty bit of bric-a-brac at a great bargain. Sunn after, the whist club, of which sin- is a member, met at her home, ami In r chagrin could hardly be i magi mil when she discovered thai tin- fortunate winner of this article was the very clerk who sold it. Tin- mortuary staliies for the Dis. trie! of Columbia during' the past I" months show a start ling record of Iu Derculosls of the lungs. The mortality from a: causes was 5,853, and of these 713 were victims of consumption an average mortality from this one dis ease of 13.60 for each week in the year, Illinois is the largest manufacturer f oleomargarine in the country, with an annual output of ,'iu,000,0oo pounds, or 4('i per cent, of n that i- made in the United States. lYnnsv Ivaiiin come next with 11,000,01)0 pounds. The percentage of iliitt r: sas is less ihun il is in anv y In Kau ai e in this union, or In any country on the glebe save Belgium. Pome years ago the word prepared ncss came into use. Kipling had it. it An Akc of I'rr till ri d n iks. one 01 ins articles anil Copt. Mahal gave it a large! vogue. Then it began to appear il almost every naval nnd military pa- per. To-day, very truly observes thci Philadelphia Saturday Evening Post preparedness is the keynote of na tional and international politics. Tin chances are that not one in u liundrca of the ships which cost millions wil ever be engaged in a fight; hut nil the vast machinery, till the cost, nil tin effectiveness of modern invent inn, thf whole idea represents prepared ne for any emergency. A big navy Is a great influence. It impresses delln quent nut ions more than any amount of diplomacy or correspondence. U an apology or a bill of damages h due, a naval demonstration does mori to collect the bill than uny othei agency. Moreover, tl big navy adver tiscs the nation. In this country tin whole tendency Is toward a larger do Velopment upon the seas-. Our ship yards tiro doing greater work; out maritime companies are stretching forth in spite of the laws which him; them; our commerce is reaching ti every civilized settlement, Of courst the nuvy mus-t expand in accordance with all this growth, and it is a fact that all the parties in congress agret to larger appropriations in every ses sion of congress. A year ago tht total reached $63,000,000 the largest in the history of the nation. The new appropriation will probably call foi $10,000,000 more, and thus the in crease will go on until our nnviil ex penditures will probably exceed 100y 000,000 every twelvemonth. A Milwaukee wheelman tells a good joke on himself. The other evening hi left his bicycle -with a friend who u SWIFT SPECIFIC CO.. ATLANTA. C. i mpli i.veil in a st i The follow ing in t he wheel to go it in front of a si reet, w here he i In- nvv net- chnnc ire i m Mlchlgn n -1 reet. u n i ng the f riend "ok m a n errn mi. leaving store un W et t W ,itr mule n call. Jusl then il to route alone lis revognizco tin- wneel, ami, sieiitt' Win el, opportunity for a little fun. took out his trouser guards, put tin m on. mount ed the wheel ami rode away. Wlii the borrower reappeared on the wall he found no bicycle. Turning pah us death lie hurried to the police station and reported tin- theft. The police were given a description of tin- bicycle and now the owner of tin- wheel is afraid to ride his own bike for fi a i of being nrresti tl as a thh f. The census shows some niiecr thing's about Texas. For instance. Bailey county has but four residents, Cockran has- 25-; Andrews, ::T: Ly un, 17; Dawson, 36, Twenty five others have less than 500, .Some counties have no running stream within theif borders, some are hundreds of miles from a railroad, and others are ,-it-tnost wholly inhabited by prairie dogs, jack rabbits and rattlesnake. Tom Green county, the largest iu '.tit state, has 45,000 square miles, wfiicb is larger than the whole state of Ohio, and has hut 6,804 inhabitant . The shirtwaist for men promises to be extremely popular next summer. Salesmen for furnishing' houses "ho are now on the road are sending in large orders for shirtwaists for next spring, and report thai the demand will probably be heavy. Manufac turers report that Ihe denial -1' iol such gnrmi nts has far exceeded thesj expect n I ii His. ami that they will tic cum pe I led. lo In;, he up many IIHITO goods in thai shape than 1 hi .V Ullliul- pated. A woman was haled lo court in West moreland, Kun because she had tg nurcd a summons ns a witness. (Jn be ing asked the reusmi for In r ci inpt uous act, she gravely replied: ". we have smallpox down iu our house, .in' I tin. tight, you might be kind) r suiter prejudiced ng'ln it." Court was in stantly adjourned, and the judge, sher iff and onlookers tumhlid over cucb other in trying to get outside. A queer judicial tangle is reported from Osage county, Kan. It thai a young' woman sued her husband for divorce and got it, but after the decree hud been granted it was discov ered that the husband was not yet of age. and therefore could not be -ued in a court of law. ll is said thai the difficulty may be overcome by appoint ing a guardian for the boy and lhn suing through him. Three Haiti more meal dealers were filed for selling red frankfurter saue- "('s' ro!("""1 by means of an aniline dJ'e' although an expert testified that the dye was n cool tar preparation con taining no arsenic, ami was a perfect ly healthy article of food. Mr Stout, of the Wisconsin senate, is giving- to his town Menoinlne n $60,000 public clubhouse, gymnasium, natatorium, bowling- alley, etc., ail un der one roof. The natural conclusion is that Mr. Stout wants his fellow townsmen to be stout also. I'ropi r I y owners of the Pox lake re gion in Wisconsin have banded togeth er to t ill the waters of Fox, Grass and ither lakes in the vicinity of the (ier milll carp, in order to keep the game lisb which make I hose lakes famous I from ui lug driven out. A Ckeap Di-llvrrnnce. "Well, you look happy for a man vho has just been 'touched.' Didn't I see you give a dollar to that fellow you were talking with a minute ago?" "Von did. I am happy, too. He told me he would pay the money buck to-morrow." 4 "Oh!" "Hut it isn't his promise that makes me joyful. Oh no! He has bored roe nearly to death during the past yesr or more with stories about his boy j and by repeating to me what he eon- i lidered the child's funny sayings, j Now this is all ended forever. After , this he will pretend not to see me when we meet. And I'd have gladly . made it five dollars, if he had wanted 1 thl much." Chicago Times-Herald