The Fulton County news. (McConnellsburg, Pa.) 1899-current, December 15, 1910, Image 6

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    MAN WHO HELPS HIS BROTHEPl
Hli "Boys" Call Him the "General Ad
viser Without Pay" He It
Partial to None.
WtiPti a miiii loves to live ho usual
Jy run !o nmonv; men who rare llttln
whether they live or not find t o pood.
Such h man Is Augustus 10. ViutR'um,
immaculate of drcaa ami of ln-art von
eriiMc In enrs and usefulness, whom
one may sec almost any day either Oil
HoHiin Common or at the Youiik
Hen's Christian I'tiion.
His rpcelnlty Is helping his fallen
end diKoouratU'd brother, whether ho
hv a (isiirette Ftnohli'i;, boy or a rum
Bodden and dlsln in lennl den lirt of n
man. Ills ereed Is heerfiilness and
bis passion Is books.
Often one may s't l::m. tall and
Utralpht, raullb'Hsly attired In a frnek
coat, with his flowing white hciinl imtl
Ms Ioiir and carefully trimmed white
locks. Ft.-indilitr v.ith or -lttl)ur beside
some r.iKRed a".d nnkempt victim of
rln tim-tanc es w lio h.is niimlit the only
place where the j i!ii o " ill not tell
hi in to move on, the "-vinion, and
then one Is Hiiro to he Mnick by the
contrast. Many a man ho has met.
there 5:.-,u later become :s clean of
body and heart as himself, nnd (ill
throiiKh IJs nfet'ons pood nainre and
brotherly comrailerie.
Among the younger men with whom
this old young man of ?." unceasingly
labors be Is known as "the Konernl
adviser without pay," and he Is as In
terested In their ambitions as they
can he. and so youthful is he In their
presence that he Is always one of
them.
Mr. Vniighan Is not engaged In ac
tive business this summer, but he
comes to lioeton every day, rain or
Fhlne, to talk with his "boys," as be
calls them. Some of these have never
before known a real friend. Ho Is
highly edurated.and counts among his
friends many college presidents and
profpsnors.
He was born In Mlddleboro, nearly
seventy-live years ago, and traces his
llneiige back to Peregrine White of
Mayflower fame.
"I love to live." said he to me, "nnd
I want to help 'the boys' to enjoy liv
ing, too."
Does Your Cat Cough?
Poor pussy! As If the immemorial
charges against her of keeping us
awake o' nights and of eating canary
birds whenever she gets the chance
were not enough, the doctors have
Just discovered that for years she has
been responsible for tho spread of
diphtheria. Dr. G. J. Awburn of
Manchester, England, having traced
en epidemic of this disease In a sub
urb of that city to a pet cat belonging
to one of his patients, has found, after
much clever ii.vestlgatlon, that all
cats arc peculiarly susceptible to
diphtheritic affections of the throat.
He has therefore recently been warn
ing all families who own cats to
watch them carefully, and, If they de
velop coughs, to forbid their being
hugged and petted. Dr. Awburn fur
ther recommends that If the cough
perslfts and the cat begins to grow
thin to have the animal destroyed at
once. The only really safe way, he
says. Is to let the first wheezo be
piiHsj's death warrant.
Progress in Railroading.
"Yes," said the lady whose dress
cae is covered with strange foreign
In be s, "the way railroads run now
lubels, "the way railroads are run now
adays is a great Improvement over
what they were GO years ago."
"Hut surely you had no experience
as a traveler 50 years ago," says her
friend.
"I don't mean that, nut nowadays,
don't you notice, when there is a wreck
it is always had at some point conveni
ent t j a cluster of farm houses where
the victims can go for coffee and to
get warm?"
Unusual.
"The captain of the football team Is
an unusual man."
"Is that so?"
"Yes, he didn't shed tears when his
team lost."
Experience Is a safer and more use
ful guide than any principle, however
accurate and scientiliv it may be.
Uuckle.
When a woman refuses a man and
he takes to drink, It's a question
whether he is trying to drown bis sor
row or Is celebrating his escape.
Many a woman Is slnglo from choice
the choice made by a man who
chose another.
ItouuiHiil.i has 0,000,000 inhabitants,
of whom 30.000 aro blind.
EAGER TO WORK.
Health Regained by Right Food.
The average healthy man or woman
Is usually eager to bo busy at some
useful task or employment.
But let dyspepsia or indigestion get
hold of one, and all endeavor becomes
ft burden.
"A year ago, after recovering from
an operation," writes a Michigan lady,
"my stomach and nerves began tojjlve
me much trouble.
"At times my appetite was vora
cious, but when Indulged, Indigestion
followed. Other times I bad no appe
tite whatever. The food I took did not
nourish me and I grew weaker thun
ever.
"1 loft Interest In everything and
wanted to be alone. ( bad always bad
good nerves, but now the merest trifle
would upset me and bring on a vloient
headache. Walk.ng across the room
m as an effort and prescribed exercise
was out of the question.
"I bad teen Grape-N.it advertised,
but did not believe what I read at the
time. At last when It seemed as if i
n il literally starving, I began to eat
Crape-N'uts.
"I bad not been able to work for a
year, lut now after two months on
Grape-Nuts I am eager to be at work
again. My stomach gives me do trou
ble now, my nerves are steady as ever,
and interest In life and ambition have
come bms with the rotuin to health."
Head "The Road to WellTllle," in
pkgs. "There's a Kcaton."
Bvr r4 th anove la-ttarf A mw
ma apvwara Iron liana Hue. T-
or nranlaa, Inu, sail iall el banana
iavwtnal. j
A
V,
ACTRESS WEDS WEALTHY AMERICAN
" t i 1 . S
e l i, , t J t ( , , ?
V
J 'jy ,
CHILD ISJBORN APE
Lecturer Explains Working of 'Bi
ogenetic Law.
UJ yby WILBUR D WWTXT
i
Elucidates Many Strange and Absurd
Instincts That Corns and do Dur
ing Human Infancy, Child
hood and Adolescence,
NEW YOKK. A cablegram from PariB announced the wedding of Char
lotte Katherlne rainier to James C. Parrish, Jr., a relative of the Van
derbllts. The Parrlshes are very wealthy and have a beautiful home
near Southampton. Mr. Parrish, Jr., is a Harvard graduate, and was ad
mitted to the bar this year. Miss Palmer formerly was in "Wang," and
also with the Lew Field forces. In London she numbered Mrs. Oscar Lew
lsohn, Mrs. nenry Lyndhurst 3ruce and Sir George Prescott among her de
Toted admirers.
w6Mr0LlECfll
English Court Refuses to Aid The
atrical Press Agent.
Faked Expulsion of Women Who In
sisted on Wearing Big Hats In
Theater Called by Judge a
Fraud on Justice.
London. British courts of Justice
must not be exploited for the pur
poses of advertisement. This legal de
cision was given In a case brought by
Thomas Lumley Dann, a press agent,
against Frank Curzon, the theatrical
manager. The evidence revealed the
remarkable manner In which the pub
lic was "spoofed" over a certain mati
nee hat Incident which occurred at the
Prince of Wales theater in London
some months ngo. This incident was
manifestly a fake to all those who are
Initiated Into the ways of theatrical
advertisement. '
Mr. Dann In his action claimed 500,
which he ' alleged was the sum Mr.
Curzon agreed to pay him for arrang
ing the affair, while Mrs. Dann', who
asplsted her husband In ' the affair,
claimed $2C2 In payment for her ser
vices. Mr. Curzon admitted that he
agreed fo the Incident being arranged,
but denied that he agreed to pay these
sums.
The judgment of Judge Woodfall.
who tried the case, explains the na
ture of the Incident. . He said:
"In the early part of this year, when
the plaintiff was employed by the de
fendant as his press agent, he sug
gested to the defendant that It would
be an excellent advertisement both for
the theater and for the defendant as
manager, if the following scheme were
carried out: Two ladles and a gentle
man , were to be engaged, the ladles
were to occupy two stalls and to wear
ultra-fashionable hats. The gentleman
was to occupy a stall Immediately be
hind them, and during the fall of the
curtain peremptorily demand of them
that they should take their hats off.
"The ladles were to refuse, and the
gentleman to urgently and audibly In
sist, and the disturbance was to attain
such proportions that the defendant
should be sent for and invite the trio
outside In the corridor, and demand
of tho ladles that they should remove
their hats or leave the theater; that
the ladles should resist the demand;
that defendant should thereupon eject
them by a technical assault of laying
his hand on the shoulders of one of
them; that the ladles should leave and
summon the defendant before a magis
trate for the assult and that the de
fendant should plead the right to
protect the convenience of hlB audi
ence. "The defendant consented, and the
scheme was carried out In every de
tail, the price of their seats which
they had not paid for was ostensibly
returned to the ladles, and In pursu
ance of the plot they proceeded to
summon the defendant for assault.
"The magistrate heard the charge
and dismissed It, holding that the de
fendant was Justified in what he had
done. The plaintiffs now allege that
tho defendant agreed to pay them for
their services in carrying out the ven
ture. "I am of opinion that the agreement
alleged Is Illegal, being contrary to
public policy, and that no action Is
maintainable 'upon it And this for
two reasons: (1) The spectacle of two
ladles being peremptorily and brusque
ly treated might well have aroused In
terlocution on their behalf and led to
a serious breach of the peace. (2) The
Invocation of a court of law to punish
an offense which, to the knowledge of
the parties, had not been, even tech
nically committed, was In the nature
of a fraud on the administration of
Justice. I therefore dismiss the two
actions, and leave each party to pay
his own costs.
"In case of a successful appeal
against this decision, and to save the
expense of a second hearing, I will
Btate what otherwise would have been
my decision. I find that the defend
ant did agree to pay the plaintiff
105; that the defendant's setoff Is
valid, and I should have given Judg
ment accordingly for the defendant,
with costs. I find the defendant did
agree to pay Mrs. Dann 52 10s., and
I should have given Judgment for her,
with costs."
Chicago. J. Howard Moore told
members of the Socialist league a
lot about babies the other night Mr.
Moore discussed "Tile Iilology of the
Child" at a meeting which was held
at 1G0 Washington street.
"There Is a law In biology called
the biogenetic law. It was discov
ered by llaeckel. It Is one of the
most Important laws of the organic
world. It la this: 'Each organUra In
Its Individual development repeats
the life history of the race to which
It belongs.'
"No being comes into the world full
grown. Every being goes through the
performance of what Is called growing
before it is a complete organism.
Every being commenced as a small,
simple and rather shapeless bit of
protoplasm. The gulf between this
condition and maturity is bridged In
by a longer or shorter series of
changes in size, form and architec
ture. The remarakble thing about
these changes Is that they are strik
ingly parallel to the changes, which
the race has undergone In its evolu
tion from the beginning of the earth.
"The biogenetic law applies to men
tal phenomena as well as to
physical. Only In the light of this
law Is It possible to understand the
many strange and absurd instincts
that come and go during human in
fancy, childhood and adolescence.
It has been said that the child Is
born savage. This Is not quite true.
It Is worse than that Only after a
rather long and Inglorious prelim
inary as a quadruped 1b It able to walk
with Its pront feet In the air and
rightfully lay claim to the title of
savage."
Mr. Moore said the general Ideas of
the child. Its conception of itself, and
its outlook on the world are essen
tially the same as those of the savage
narrow, mystical, and naive. The
child believes In ghosts, fairy tales,
magic and miracles, much as the Bav
age does.
Among the points brought out by
the lecture were the following:
Tbe human baby antedates the sav
age by several huudred thousand
years.
The child Is a born ape.
The Instinct of the baby to cling to
everything within reach Is the instinct
of tbe monkey.
A stick In the hands of a baby be
comes a club.
A baby's attack on the cat is a
relic of the club stage In man's de
velopment A child's love of camp fire, the
forming of gangs among boys, the de
sire to stone dogs and snowball ped
dlers, nnd the strong love for a bow
and arrow are remnants of the ear-,
lier man.
. Prince Learning Aviation.
Berlin. Prince Henry of Prussia,
who Is visiting at Wolfsgarten, em
ploys bis leisure moments in learning
to operate an aeroplane and has made
several successful flights. He Is be
ing Instructed by August Euler, who
Is skilled in the art.
MANY OPERATIONS ON HEART
Have Become More or Less of Com
monplace In Medical History
100 Cases Recorded.
New York. Surgical operations
upon tbe heart have become more or
less of a commonplace In medical his
tory. Something approximating 100
cases of the sewing up of heart
wounds are on' record, and the recov
eries have been considerable when
one considers tbe highly dangerous
character of such work. Hitherto,
however, heart surgery has been lim
ited to accident cases.
In a recent Issue of the Annals of
Surgery one of the workers at the
Rockefeller Institute of Medical He
search discusses tbe possibility of
treating diseased hearts surgically.
He has made numerous experiments
on animals and believes that such op
erations will be successfully per
formed on human belnga in the near
future. His tests have convinced blm
that the beart can be opened, scraped
out (cleaned, so to speak), sewii up
and started off on Its "beating" path
again without any great, at leat in
superable, difficulty. By an inganlous
system of side piping and new vban
nellog he Is able temporarily o cut
out of the circulation portions of such
important vessels as the descending
aorta, the largest artery In the body,
without killing the rnlmal. Among
bis suggested operations Is one on the
coronary arteries of the beart for tbe
cure of angina pectoris.
This doctor has apparently proved
to bis own satisfaction on animals
that successful surgical Interference
with tbe great vessels and the heart
Itself Is a possibility. It Is, of course,
a long step from these experiments to
actual operations on human beings,
but there is every Indication that the
latter feat will be attempted in tbe
near future. The Intractability of
cardiac affections and their high fa
tality make tbe proposed new surgery
a thing of great general Interest, and
may Justify the extreme boldness of
the proposal.
LIVER IS MOST FAITHFUL ORGAN
Texas Stats Board of Health Issues
Most Remsrkable and Interest
ing Bulletin.
San Antonio, Tex. The Texas state
board of health has Issued a remark
able and Interesting bulletin address
ed to "all Interested In death." Un
der the title "What Are You Most
Apt to Die From?" It says: "That
dread scourge, tuberculosis, spares the
Infant, except In tbe second half or the
third year, when there Is a startling
death rate among children from this
disease. It Is between 30 and 80
years that tuberculosis reaps ths bulk
cf Its grim and awful harvest After
SO years, tbe possibility of death from
this disease decreases rapidly and In
proportion until the 60 year mark Is
part.
. Hut Just before the Immunity from
tuberculosis la about to end, say al
44 years, tbe terrible scourge, cancer.
brf1 to eat the threads of human
Ufa. AtglunlDg shortly before 60
years, cancer springs Intc the first
place as the death cause. Before 45
cancer Is almost unknown as a general
cause of mortality.
"Pneumonia kills mostly before 16
years of age, then It lets mankind
largely alone until 60 years la past,
when It figures high In the death list
It Is a cowardly, skulking enemy, and
kills off tbe old folk add the children
Cerebral apoplexy, or what old-fash
toned people used to call a stroke,
kills few before the age of 60, while
typhoid kills usually between 10 and
2U years,
"The heart' and kidneys seldom
cause a fatal disease until after 60,
and then tbe heart usually Is affected
only from some other disease, such as
rheumatism or pneumonia.
"What Is commonly called the larg
est organ of the body, namely,
tbe liver, also bss the best - rec
ords for bonest snd faithful service.
The deaths of men and women
from direct liver diseases are com par-
Believes Himself Old King.
raris. Pierre Lotl, the author, is
convinced be Is living a second life
being a reincarnation of the Egyptian
king Sesostris,
When last In Egypt he had photo
graphs taken of the profile of the mum
my of this ancient monarch and side
by side with It places his own on a
postcard.
The likeness Is declared to be strik
ing. There are the same receding
forehead and hawk nose, and now that
the sailor-author has shaved bis beard
his chin Is seen to be the same. Print
ed on tbe card Is "SesostrU, delncar
nated, 1250. Pierre Lorl, not yet de
incarnated, 1910.
atlvely very rare. Also It Is sel
dom affected until the meridian of life
Is well past"
Esperanto Gains In Francs.
Paris. Esperanto Is steadily gain
ing recruits In Franoe and many of
these recruits are men of letters
Tristan Bernard, tbe playwright, says
bis next piece will first be written In
esueranto although It win h uca ft. .
! translated Into French for the public
"Tbe days Is coming,' be says, "when
French will be merely tbe language of
luxury while esperanto will be oc ev
erynodys tongue."
Tapestry Sells for 133,000.
London. An Arras tapestry, form
ing part of a series Illustrating the
seven deadly sins, which waa nrtt.
nally tbe property of Cardinal Woiaey,
" ""'u numum yesieraay, bring
ing $33,000. The panel Is thirteen feet
square. It was found in a mansion In
1 Cornwall, , '
A Rebellion,
P WW ttllwil III jllU
wMili pfei "Win! ml
mi
I've locked the door upon them all,
they're watting; on tha walk
The man to teach me how to breathe
the one who preaches talk,
Tha one who guarantees to give a grace
ful, easy gait,
And all the other specialists; I'll leavt
them there to wait
I'm tired, tired, tired and their book
are on the shelf,
And for today I'm going to be my elm
pie, awkward aelf!
I shall not draw my breath Just bo and
hold It while I count;
I do not care how much I breathe, noi
measure the amount
I'm elmply going to take my breath sc
that It gets Inside;
The yearning of my muscles for a rest
won't be denied.
O, what relief to draw a breath and not
think of the rules
For breathing from tie diaphragm, ai
ordered by the achools!
Today I shall not talk Just so I shnll noi
place my tones
So that I feel a tremor In the little nasa
bones;
I'll vocalize to suit myself; I'll turn my
larynx loose
And let It shuttle up and down and sim
ply raise the deuce
The elocution teacher Isn't here upon thf
watch
And I Intend to have a spree a llng'iai
debauch)
Today I will not hold my chin at Juai
the right degree
Nor keep my belt-line gathered In anc
balance from my knee;
I'll walk Just any way I please, flat
footed, pigeon-toed,
Or any way I feel Inclined that Isn't
la mode.
I'll drag my feet. I'll shuffle them. I'l
atep on toe or heel
And would that I had words to tell th
thrill of Joy I feel!
I'm Independent for a day! I will not
hold the thought,"
I will not worry my poor brain by think,
lng as I ought,
I will not plumb my consciousness noi
turn my ego on
Aha! I looked outside and saw my
teachers all had gone!
I'm tired, tired, tired and their book
are on tha shelf.
And for today at least I'll be, my sim
ple, awkward aelf! s
How He Lost His Job.
"Mr. Nossitt," said the new man,
who had been engaged as a llterarv
adviser In the publicity department of
the railway, "It seems to me that when
we designate a man as traveling pas
senger agent, we are tautological, at
the least."
"We are what?" asked the superior.
"Tautological. What does a travel
ing passenger agent do?"
"He goes around and gets people to
ride over our lines, of course."
"Yes. He gets passengers. Why
call blm a traveling passenger agent?
Of a necessity, a passenger must be
a traveling passenger."
"How's that?""
"I say a passenger must be a travel
ing one or he Isn't any good to us
In fact, he cannot be a passenger at
all. A passenger Is some one who
travels Tbe statement that we send
out an agent to get traveling passen
gers Is absurd on the face of It. and "
"You may convert yourself Into a
traveling passenger to the street, with
a stop-over at the cashiers' office long
enough to get what is due you to
date." snorted tho superior,, whirling
back to his desk.
Argument for Monogamy.
"The idea," she said, "of men hav
ing four or Ave wives, as they do In
some countries. It Is Impossible for
a man to love more than one woman
at a time. Why, It would be Just as
sensible if a woman were to have five
or six husbands."
"But," be commented, "there never
was a woman who could b Jealous of
five or six men at once without losing
ber mind."
Unromantlo.
"T could dance this way forever."
"I hope you won't You get terribly
out of step half the time."
Just for Spite.
"She seems to be a woman of ex
ceptionally unpleasant disposition," oh
serves the newcomer, referring to an
absent one. t
"Unpleasant disposition?" echoes
tbe native. "Why, did you never bear
of what she did to cause heartburn
ings among her acquaintances? She
announced a big dinner and ball for a
certain evening, and then never in
vited soul to It."
The manners of some people axe al
most as unapproachable as those of a
buss haw.
Financial Converestlon.
"Money talks!" asserts tbe gentle
man who Is offering to bet a large
sum that a certain thing will or will
not happen. "You can argue all you
like, but money Is the thing that con
vinces me. Money talks."
"I know It does," protests the othei
man. "I remember that when I had
money It was always saying: 'Well, 1
must be going.' " .
When a man bumps Into a brand of
trouble worth talking about he has
but little to sty about it
TWO WORLD FAMED GRANNIES
One of These Talented Women Is
Sarah Bernhardt and the Other
Ellen Terry.
Two famous grandmothers are dis
tinguished visitors of this country. Re
ferring to these talented ladies the
Rochester Post Express says: "One of
the grandmothers Is Mme. Sarah Hern
hard t; the other Is Ellen Terry. Iloth
actresses have reached an rge when It
Is permissible to retire from active
life; but the French actress Is said to
be as energetic as a woman half her
age, while Ellen Terry Is declared to
be as young as ever she was In tbe
palmy days when she and Henry Irv
ing ruled the theatrical world of Eng
land. Mies Terry has retired from the
stage so far as acting Is concerned,
and has taken to lecturing on Shakes
peare's heroines. And who cculd do
better than she who has played so
many of the womanly women of tbe
great dramatist? Readers of her
breezy biography know what she
thinks of Portia, Beatrice, Voila, Rosa
land and other famous women of the
tragedies and comedies, but no print
ed page could charm as does the won
derfully expressive features and the
velvet voice of the greatest living
English-speaking actress."
SAVED0LD LADY'S HAIR
"My mother used to have a very bad
humor on her head which the doctors
called an eczema, and for it I had two
different doctors. Her bead was very
sore and her hair nearly all fell out
In spite of what they both did. ' One
day her niece came In and they were
speaking of how her hair was falling
out and the doctors did It no good.
She says, 'Aunt, why don't you try
Cutlcura Soap and Cutlcura Oint
ment?' Mother did and they helped
ber. In six months' time the Itching,
burning and scalding of ber head was
over and her hair began growing. To
day she feels much In debt to Cutl
cura Soap and Ointment for the fine
head of hair she has for. an old lady
of seventy-four.
"My own case waa an eczema in my
feet. As soon as the cold weather
came my feet would Itch and burn and
then they would crack open and bleed.
Then I thought I would flee to my
mother's friends, Cutlcura Soap and
Cutlcura Ointment I did for four or
Ave winters, and now my feet are as
smooth as any one's. Ellsworth Dun
ham, Hiram, Me.. Sept- 30. 1909."
TOO BAD.
AH' iAJl &aJ W
Mr. Knocker I had little faith in
the curative properties of your medi
cine. The Agent But it cured you?
Mr. Knocker Yes, of even the little
faith I had In It.
Sense of Taste.
From a series' of experiments re
cently made at the University of Kan
sas it is evident 'that the average per
son can taste the bitter of quinine
when one part Is dissolved in ,62,000
parts of water. Salt was detected In
water when one part to 640 of the
liquid was used. Sugar could be tast
ed in 228 parts of water and common
soda in 48. In nearly all cases women
could detect a smaller quantity than
men.
Free Blood Cure.
If you have pimples, offensive eruptions,
old sores, cancer, itching, scratching
eczerou, suppurating swellings, bone pains,
hot skin, or if your blood is thin or im
pure, then Botanic Blood Balm (B.B.B.)
will heal every sore, stop all itching snd
make the blood pure and rich. Cures after
all else fails, jl.00 per large bottle at
drug stores. Sample free by writing Blood
Balm Co., Atlanta, Ua., Uepartmeut B.
Asking Too Much.
"Tbe count has promised that he will
never beat or kick me If I will marry
blm," Bald the beautiful heiress.
"But has be promised to work for
you?" her father asked.
"Oh, papa, don't be unreasonable."
TO DRIVE OIT MALARIA
AMI hi ll.l I f THE SYSTFM
Take the Ol.l tuniUnl uliOVMS TiBTHI.BnH
OlliLX, TON ID. Yuu know whal run are Ukln.
Tb formula la platoW prlnUMl on erarr txiuie,
(bowing U la atuaSr (Julnine and Iron to a tat
14 form. Tha Oulalna drlvaa out tha maUkrlm
and tha Iron but Ida up tha arataw. Sold Itf all
dualara fur Ml laara. i'riua all can la.
To Oblige Him.
Mr. Porklns You're always bound
to have the last word, anyway.
Mrs. Dorklns Yes; that's because
you always wait to hear me say it
No matter how long your seek may be
or how sore your throat, Hamlins Wizard
Oil will cur it surely and quickly. It
drives out all soreuaas sod iahajnmation.
The girl In the silk stockings never
gets her skirts muddy.
THS JOCULAR CLRRK.
J$Bm& Jill
mmmMmm
ir!..4.-lrr.Mt rWM,1
ya-r 1111111' "lilt
Customer (In grocery store) Axe
thoBe eggs on that counter fresh?
Clerk Yes, ma'am.
Customer How long have they been
laid?
Clerk I laid them there myself,
ma'am, 20 minutes ago.
Tribute to Painter's Skill.
One of the still life paintings by
Jan van Huysen in the museum at
The Hague was recently injured, but
it Is believed the perpetrator waa
neither vandal nor. thief.
The picture represents a basket ot
fruit on which a number of Insects
have gathered. On a pale yellow ap
ple, which is the centerpiece in the
cluster of fruit, is a large fly, painted
so true to nature, so say the officials
of the gallery, that the canvas was
Injured by some one who endeavored
to "shoo" it and brought his cane or
hand too close to the canvas. "A
tribute to the painter's genius," says
the letter recording the fact "for which
the work had to suffer."
What World Lost?
"It was the worst calamity that ever
happened to me," sighed the pale, in
tellectual, high browed younj woman.
"I had written a modern society nov
el, complete to the last chapter, and
a careless servant girl gathered the
sheets of the manuscript from the
floor, where the wind bad blown them,
and used them to start a fire in the
grate."
"What a burning shame that was!"
commented Mrs. Tartan.
Literary Accuracy.
"You write of your hero as stealing
home in the darkness," said the ed
itor. "Yes," replied the author.
"Well, you ought to know better
than that He couldn't steal home in
the dark. If it waa. dark enough to be
worth noticing the game would have
been called."
A Long Chance.
"I took a long chance when I asked
her to marry me."
"She rejected you, eh?"
"No, that was the long chance I
took. She accepted me."
For IIE4nCIIK Illrka' APCIIN1I
Whatuer from Colda, Heat, Btomach or
Nervotia Troubles, Capudine will retlara 70a.
It' liquid pleaaant to take act Immedi
ately. -Try It. loo., SSc.. and 60 oonta at drug
stores.
Some wfse philosopher once re
marked that we live In thoughts, not
years. This is especially true of wom
en after they pass thirty.
Hr. Wlnalow's Soothlnp; Byrup for Children
teething, soften the gum, reduce inflamma
tion, allay pain, cure wind colic, 95o a bottle.
Perhaps our clouds have a silver
lining, but it generally takes other
people to see it
1
Hale's Honey
Of Morehound and Tar -
Loosens the Phlegm
Allays Irritation
Arrests Tickling
Soothes and Heals '
Contain Be opium
or anything Injurious
All TMirgltta
For Coughs and Colds
Plki'f TsstnaclM Drops Cure Is On Htoutt
If you but
knew what harsh
cathartics do, you'd
always use Cascarets.
Candy tablets, vegetable and
mild. Yet just as effective as salt!
and calomel Take one when you
need it. Stop the trouble promptly"!
Never wait till night &
Vast -pncVat box, 10 cents at dros atora.
Each tablet of the genuine i mark 1 CCC
T5 1 ol&arjaperda-
siciapte bay
anvthmc arar
tiaad la ka coIusuh ahoula incut (swa
Sarinf wfiat they aak tot, luaiag all
PATFMTS 7 a'ftirriTwn-
The Human Heart
The heart is a wonderful doable puaap, throafh the
actio ot whiea the blood stream is kept tweepiaf
rewad sad rouad threefe the body at the rate 0! aevea
stiles aa boar. " Resseaiber this, that our bodiee
will aot stand ths strain ef ever-work without good,
pare bleed any more then tbe angina eon run smooth
ly without oil." Alter many years o( etudy in tbe
aotive preotiee of medioiae, Dr. R. V. Pierce found
that when the stosaaeh was oat of order, tbe blood
inn ure and there were lynintoai oi general break
down, a teaie made oi the glyeer' ex t root of eertaia
roots was the beet corrective. Thie he soiled
Dr. Pierce's polden Medical Discovery
Bains' made without eloohol,' thie " Medical Disoovary " helps the stomach W
assimilate the food, thereby eorin dyapeoela. It ia especially adapted to diseases
attended with exoeeeiva tiiaue waste, notably in eoavalesoeaoe from varices
havers, Ux thin-blooded people and those who are always " catching sold."
Dr. FWea't Common Scnee Media! Adviser la eoat on receipt oi SI oae
eatit stamps lor tn ) ranch eleth-beand hook of luua pagea. Address l,
IU V. fiaroe, No. 6SJ Main Street, Bufalo, N. V,