THE FUTURE
BY Wt.fl i. r.
m
f)ot thou beholU.tthiit sea?
ft. stretches out before thee, bright and
still;
No sound of tumult doer, tbe calm air fill;
All speaks serenity!
The path V.'g the shore
fa bright wit', Howes that bloom an I fade
by turn.
4nd high abore the grasses and green fe.-is
Wave the tall sycamore.
That path thou Mill muet tread;
'And though the trees glow aparaet by the
walk,
And blossoms wither on the drying italk,
By gentle showers unfed.
Still thoa must tread that strand.
And gaaa orf the horizon rolled in miat ;
Ti useless to complain or to resist;
xl holds thee by the hand.
Aad thoa that flood must cross;
At soins strange moment shall thy path
way bendT
Ere yai perchance its beauty is at end
r lass has felt its loss.
Then happy shni' thou he,
If tbe dun vapor on the water's rim
.Shall lift, and show, however faint and
dim,
Some bright rsalit)
Whether it be a scene
Of nature glorified by brighter skies.
Which save in visions, greet no human
syea
fjo heavenly and serene
Or some city fair,
Which opes its golden gstes to thv repose.
Oh, happy they, who enter gates like those
That shut out all despair!
But if tbe scene be black
Or opens but to caverns vsst and cold:
'J'houghthy fierce spirit be untamed and
Nor heed's the body's rack,
Think not to shun the view.
Nor hop to tread sgain thy earthly past.
Breathe forth one prayer, be it thy first or
last.
And bid this life adieu.
Scribner's Ms-inr. 1804.
)(
BRICKS AND HIS HONOR.
999- - C
The Story of Cyrus Biggsrslake, Compute Martyr.
Cyrus Biggerslake. nf Montana,
discovered San Francisco and MIsh
Sadie Van Vinka simultaneously.
This corpulent little man with one
oye on Providence (Alluded to by
his friends as "that horrible Bqutnt")
adopted the former without ques
tion, and wns similarly adopted by
the latter. Miss Van Vinka con
fessed there was really nothing; In
him; that he had merely captured
her by an eplgrammatlcal remark
(in her favorite poet, Austin Dobson,
"that Giant In Trifles;" that she was
dying to chanye her name; that he
was so like a little dog of hers that
had departed in peace.
Mr. Biggerslake took to the idea
of double harness kindly when she
proposed to him behind a potted
palm in the Palace Hotel. He was
suffering from one of his periodical
Its of somnolent boredom, and.
though marriage had always been
labeled in his mind as a splendid
sin he would never have the courage
to commit, when this dashing vision,
with courage enough it seemed for
the two of them, paused for reply,
he coyly mumbled: "As soon as you
like," and minutely inspected the
roof.
As his bride prospective was a
'Van" and a popular society hMle,
and he himself a reputed millio aire,
the press at once took the matter
In hand, giving a generous measure
of bold black type surrounding im
pressionist portraits, and, after hav
ing raked up a few dubious scandals
Jn connection with Miss Van Vinka,
'and commented disagreeably on Blg
erslake's Montana antecedents, they
unanimously united in blessing the
'jappy couple, and let it go at that.
The result, however, was quite
pitiful. Cyrus Biggerulake discov
ered hs was passionately in love
with his wife, while his wife dis
covered that a leading physician,
Or. Charles Falloon, was the only
man in 'Frisco for her. Not that
."vi iik had ever let it appear he had
still this discovery to make, or that
3adle let it appear her discovery was
made. Both disposed of the matter
tomewhat in the manner of an ex
perienced oonsumer of Manhattan
cocktails disposing of the cherry.
Mrs. Biggerslake had the courage
9f Pacific Coast opinions. Sho was
not one of those people with the fear
of Sunday editions in their hearts.
Cn fact, she was rather partial to
headlines, but she was strongly
averse to any vulgar scandal as be
came a late society belle and a
"Van," having that nice discrimina
tion in her character that enables
Justice in this country to distin
guish between a "rake-off" and a
gratuity.
The doctor became her cavalier
and confidant, as Cyrus possessed
his guide, philosopher, and friend in
the person of Silas Moran, a promi
nent lawyer and "divorce speclal
Ut" (as advertised); and, fortified
by her girlhood's experiences in
Franco (where they manage these
things so much better), it must be
conceded that she handled all parties
concerned with cosummate skill
Her husband's "unfriscan" proclivl
ties, those very traits that had origi
nally attracted, early started the
wheel of Fate. He obstinately re
fused to "take his position" in so
ciety.
"My little Masticator," he would
say, reaching up to dab a cautious
thrilled finger into cosmetical snowy
ness, "San Franciscan society al
ways reminds me rjf popular photo
graphs of the moon." Sadie, with
her pearllness impaired, her temper
ruffled, and her brain awhlrl in
cryptic labyrinths, would have
gnashed her teeth with rage had they
not been firmly embedded in gum.
What was to bo done with a man
who had even written a book?-
though in truth it had never been
published and Silas Moran wag the
only reader thereof to return It to
his anxious friend with laconic criti
cism: "The er punctuation is
admirable."
The gist of tho matter was that,
In marrying a mau with nothing in
him, us she thought, she bad mar
lied a man with a great deal
In htm, though the soundings sel
dom proclaimed a 1epth of more
than a few Inches uuywhera. Dr.
Falloon wag no vllllan
"lu tragic life, God wot,
Ho vllllan noed be"
he was only Sadie's long felt want;
a man of little or no individualism,
cast iron in manner, to be bruken
but not bent, but with just enough,
for her purpose, of the sentiment,
peculiar to young nations, that entors
more or less into American charac
ter. "He la totully Ignorant of bridge,
thinks gambling sinful, abhors rac
ing, and is odivubh polite," she con
fided with heaving bosom Into her
doctor's ' cold, calculating ear." "He
calls her a 'Jesuit in disgulM' and
chuckles. He says he mumw from
Montana, but" appalled "he must
be an Englishman!"
Grtm-featured Falloon, whom she
had trained to stand on his hind
legs a la Dr. Johnson's dog, gave
her complete satisfaction. MyBtery
stalked a-tlptoe. "Shade of Boccac
cio, we are burning expensive In
cense!" and so It was plotted.
In tbe midst nf his petty bustlings
rushing in, rushing out, between
intervals of "browsing" in his lib
rary; sudden gusts of passion that
compelled him to dance attendance
up to the very doors of society, there
to hand Mrs. Biggerslake out of
the automobile, bow, twiddle his
mustaches, and betake himself off;
moon-struck periods during which
he gaped like the mouth of Hades,
swallowing his wife's little sins of
omission and commission that came
flying in his face from all directions
("Caesar's wife!" he whispered to
himself) in the midst of all this
with hints and warnings thrown
clean over his head by well-meaning
enemies, and muddy insinuations
cast by friends falling from his un
stained heart, Cyrus Biggerslake,
running out of his library one sum
mer's day, bubbling over with im
portance, fell plump against Death
and Tragedy In a grim procession
passing through the hail.
Picture tho poor little man, with
arms flung aloft and blanched face,
a wobbling note of interrogation!
Dr. Falloon, pale and bloody, tread
ing by the stretcher, gazed solemnly
at him, finger to lip. Friends and
servants held him back, to hold him
up a minute later, when the conclu
slve word, flitting on breathless
wings from tongue to tongue, Hut
tered at last within his ear and
sucked his senses from him.
Judge then of the stir among the
brethren of the pen when one blaz
ing October forenoon Cyrus Biggers
lake whirled down Market street In
his automobile like a tornado, urg
ing his mahout to slay and spare not
the alroady outraged speed regula
tion, and with waving arms and
specimen oaths from Montana, dart
ed under the brandished police-
batons, and turned the corner into
Montgomery street on two whoels
The fraternity resurrecting thel.-
features from foaming schooners,
real or imaginary, streaming in
frantic pursuit, found tho chariot
indeed the mahout panting expla
nations to the scandalized majesty
of law but within the building
whither he had fled, an elevator boy
scared by hlB frantic appearance
suoi tneir oojeci sitywurd like a
rocket from their upturned eyes and
lolling tongues.
"Elijah leaves us his mantle
quoth a brother, diving onto an en
velope addressed to Biggerslake in
a feminine hand. The pack pricked
ears and surged. But excitedly torn
apart the envelope was found to con
tain nothing.
bilas Moran, chewing a choice
Trinidad over the morning's mall
nearly bolted It whole at his friend's
cyclonic advent. Sinking into
padded elbow chair in the lawyer's
Banctum, Cyrus could only toss his
hands and jerk about: "My wife
my wife puffing noisily. Moran
recovered himself, discarded the cl
gar, and waited In curious patience
"Yes, my dear old friend," he said
at last soothingly, "the loss of your
good wife must be a terrible grief
to you, but
"Good wife!" shrieked Cyrus, sud
deuly recovering his breath. "Good
wife indeed! She's not dead, SilaB
The whole thing was a put-up Job
sne s gone off with Falloon. Jeers
at me from Los Angeles."
His voice broke Into a scream, and
he threw his limbs about like a rude
ly handled Jointed doll.
'Keep quiet! Bo calm!" deto
ntUed Moran In the voice that has
crushed many a cock-sure witness
Into a quivering heap. "Good heav
ens, Cyrus, If every mnn In 'Frisco
whose wife had strayed behaved like
you, the city would be an Inferno.
The deserted husband controlled
hlniBelf with a great effort.
"Listen, I'll read you her letter
ho said, pulling out the crumpled
communication whoso erstwhile cov
oilng at that moment reposed in
dozen fragments lu the pocketB of
the press.
"Then tlie coffin contained
interjected the lawyer.
vBiickB, replied Biggerslake
"Bricks and my honor."
The phrase caught his fancy.
Bricks and my honor," he re
poated.
Already bis passion was dying
from exhuustlon; bis future pose ll
lumlnatcd the skyline of his thought
The picture of a grave, gray-haired
man who never smiled rose befor
him, pacing slowly down the yoars
in lonely majesty. People would
huBh their voices at his approach
and whisper lu compassionate re
spect, "His heart is broken!" His
feelings were materializing.
During the reading, executed In
mechanical monotone (the reader's
thoughts being engrossed In him
self), Moran, with his palms pressed
professionally together in the atti
tude of prayer, wrinkled his brow
and pursed his Hps nnavallingly.
He failed entirely to discover what
was required of htm. The letter
afforded htm no clue, being simply
the senseless verbal vitriol of a silly
woman, flushed with victory and the
spoils thereof, who, not content with
knocking her aversion down, must
needs return l Inflict fresh torture
on the dazed victim. It seemed,
however, that In this case tbe hot
shot had gone aatray. Cyrus Big
gerslake looked up at Its conclusion
with an almost pleased expression
like a baby.
"It la a singular ease," said Moran,
groping for light. "I believe
Stop!" Interrupted his friend.
scratching his head. "I am trying
to think."
For nearly a quarter of an hour
Biggerslake sat bent in meditation.
Moran followed him to the regions of
thought, tracing circles In the air
with his Index finger.
"And so," said Cyrus, rising on a
sudden and stringing speech onto
wordless deliberations, "I will say
good-by. Sorry to have troubled
ou."
The formula begot Its stereotyped
reply Id Moran, more mystified than
over, and before his brain could con
trol the machine movements of his
tongue, Cyrus Biggerslake had gone
forth from his presence, the complete
martyr, leaving a faint odor of gaso
line. The summoning of the auto
mobile's master was productive of
great Journalistic activity, and the
breeze of excitement even stirred the
wings of the Press Club albatross.
Those fatal fragments:
Presently the flaring Sunday edl
lons showed their heads. The lata
Mrs. Biggerslake. the supposed vic
tim of an automobile accident, sworn
dead by her husband, certified dead
by Dr. Falloon, buried to all ap
pearances, was alive, and living with
the aforesaid doctor at Los Angeles!
The city rocked with laughter.
"Go East!" implored the martyr'i
friends. But Cyrus would not
could not.
"I, have lost Sadie," he said, "but
will not lose San FrancUco."
The fascination of 'Frisco held
him In thrall. The erect alert car
riage of the Inhabitants, duo to gaz
ng up at the Twin Peaks from on
end of Market street, and at th
Spreckels column" and the Ferry
Building clock from the other, had
his heart.
Leave 'Frisco? Never!
"Ridiculous sentimentalist!" cried
his friends, and vanished.
It must, then, have been sentt
mentallsm that took him periodically
to the cemetery with brilliant
wreaths, and arrived at the grave
a torn soul. A stranger, in con
versation with one of the attendants,
observing his abandonment of grlel
at a distance, inquired the circum
stances and the relationship of the
dead.
"Oh, he's bughouse," replied the
man, contemptuously. Should e
Napa for hla. The grave's emp "
and so on, with the whole story
embellished and enlarged.
But Biggerslake, his fat body
shaken with sobs, hung his wreaths
on the tombstone, oblivious, as far
as might be, to the surrounding
world.
"Bricks and my honor." he gulped,
sinking on one knee.
In fact, CyruB was quite happy.
T. O'B. Hubbard, In the San Fran
cisco Argonaut.
SOME WILD ANIMAL BOGIES.
n XI NO W. PI TNAM.
KNEW KIT CAHHON.
Cleaning and Taking Apart Machines.
When one has to take apart a
machine for the purpose of cleaning
It and of making any repairs that
may be found on inspection neces
sary, the proper way is not to take
the whole thing apart, then to put
it together and next to test it to seo
if anything 1b broken or out of place;
but to test the machine before taking
it apart, then to inspect each piece
and mend or straighten it, and after
that to clean the whole thing and
assemble.
If, on the contrary, cleaning Is
done before repairing, all tho re
paired parts will have to be cleaned
again, thus not only Increasing the
cost of the job, but prolonging the
time of delivery which latter 1b a
very Important element when we
are dealing with typewriting ma
chines. Scientific American.
A Singer's Lungs.
The singer at the end of tho prac
tice aria panted heavily.
"I sang one hundred and ninety-
six notos that time," he Bald, "with
out once taking breath."
"Indeed! That must be a rec
ord."
"No. The record la held by Cour
tlce Pounds. Pounds aang three
hundred and sixteen notes without
respiration in 18S8. The record pre
vious to that was held by FarluoIU,
with three hundred notes. Norman
Salmond has sung two hundred aud
olghty-Beven notes in this way.
"It Is wonderful what lungs
trained alngers have. The average
man could hardly sing fifty notes
without broathiug, whereas to the
singer two bundrod would be noth
ing." Philadelphia Bulletin. '
Some Cat Superstitions.
Napoleon Bonaparte showed a
morbid horror of cats. The night
before the battle of Waterloo a black
cat passed near him, and at the sight
the great warrior was completely
unnerved. Ho saw an omen of de
feat. Henry III of France swooned
whenever be saw a cat, aud one of
tbe Ferdinands of Germany would
tremble In his boots If a harmless
tabby got in the) line of his vision.
Among the Romana the cat was
a symbol of liberty. Tbe Egyptians
held the animal lu veneration under
tbe name of Aelurus, a deity with a
human body and a cat's head. Who
ever killed a cat, even by accident,
was put to death. Diana assumed
the form of a cat and excited the
fury of the giants. London Mirror.
the passing of the big game from
the more thickly settled districts has
gradually turned the romance of
sporlmansblp into an indiscriminate
slaughter of everything that lives by
the young hern) worshiper, who
seems to Imagine that the destruc
tion of nn Inoffensive chipmunk In
some way throws around his own
shoulders the mantle of valor with
which tradition clothes his ancestors.
To round out these encounters Into
tales that bear the telling sometimes
taxes the Ingenuity of evon those
Inventive young heroes; but their
task is fortunately lightened by the
activity with which the public swal
lows the most ludicrous rumors that
promise something of a neighbor
hood sensation. The recent killing
of a pet cinnamon bear near Oon
neaut Lake, Pennsylvania, by a
Grove City tyro la one more Illus
tration of this senseless and un
reasoning panic, something in which
the true hunter, with the courage of
the forest upon him, Is not prone to
Indulge.
Some one, frightened perhaps by
his own shadow. It cast among the
shadows of surrounding trees, gives
the cry of danger; a number of ex
citable residents hear, see or Imag
ine an unusual presence; the local
papers print a few columns of gush
about the "wild animal" roaming
through the neighborhood; then
some wilder animal, gun in hand,
too ignorant or too frightened to
consider that a cinnamon bear, never
a native of Pennsylvania, could only
by any possibility be found therein
through roan's agency or ownership;
and two homelesa wanderers are sud
denly deprived of their pet compan-'
ion and means of livelihood.
Not all "scares" terminate in an
animal tragedy that draws attention
so entirely from the ludicrous side.
Some years ago, almost In this same
neighborhood, a young man had his
nerveB considerably shaken up one
night by the sudden passage of a
Btrange animal acroBS tho road before
him this where no larger wild ani
mal was to be expected than a coon
or fox. The story was hardly credit
ed at first, but during the next few
weeks at leaBt a dozen different
people had a similar experience
either a night or, in a few instances,
in broad daylight. Some recognized
a mountain lion; others a South
American jaguar, while even the
king of beasts was himself described
with startling minuteness by one or
two of the frightened witnesses.
Some ono finally missed a sheep. A
dead calf that had been left un
burled was found to be mutilated;
then tho carrying off of full-grown
cattle was one of the strange visi
tor's reported pastimes.
With the possibility of s'uch a visi
tant among them, even those who
disbelieved the stories became inter
ested, especially as the group of wit
nesses included some of the most
solid and conservative people. It
seemed only the part of duty to rid
the neighborhood of such a danger
ous marauder, and an entire village
under tbe leadership of a good citi
zen who was familiar with the wood
lot, said to be the most frequently In
fested, started out one Sunday morn
ing on nn organized "wild animal"
hunt. Some went because they con
sidered It a duty; otherB out of
curiosity; some because the rest were
going; but in the crowd there were
doubtless some who bad a secret
hope of returning with a full-grown
African lion In their game bag or
else a secret fear that they would
see one at close quarters. Only a
part of the arruy had guns or other
efficient weapons, and only a few
of those who did were as dangerous
to u wild animal as they were to
their comrades. Needless to say, the
(;reatest danger encountered was
that from a boy or nervouB man with
u gun. A practical joker might in
u moment's outburst of misplaced en
thusiasm, have furnished wholesale
('heap Electricity For Toronto.
Although there have been several
great projects for utilizing power
from Niagara to generate electricity
on the Canadian Bide of tho boun
dary, it has been proposed to sell
most of tho product In the United
8tates. One of tho great company's
on the other side has a contract to
transmit its whole output to the old
est of the American companies. A
second Canadian company has con
structed an overhead line across tho
gorge, and Its American representa
tive plans to convey tbe current to
I.ockport, Rochester and Syracuse.
Before either of these proceedings
will be permitted the approval of the
Vnlted Statea Government muat be
secured. Under a law which was
passed by Congress a few months ago
Canadian electricity can be Imported
only when tho War Department
grants a license. The necessary ap
plications were . made not long ago
to Secretary Taft, but he has not
yet announced his decision.
At least one of the big Cauadlan
companies which has water wheels
and dynamos at the Falls, however,
Is planning to find Its market almost
exclusively in Canada. Its lino is al
ready completed to Toronto. It
really has two lines, one to be kept
in reserve for use In case of accident.
In order to test the transmission
cables the electricity was switched
on for a few minutes one night last
month. The station In Toronto at
which the wires terminate had been
lighted previously with current from
another source, but on the evoulng
of the recent test every lamp was
extlugulshed us a premlllnary to the
next step. When other switches were
Operated tbe lights all flashed up
again, under tho Influence of cur
rent from Niagara. A sufficient
leimtb of time having elapsed to
bhow that the line and other equip
ments were lu perfect order, the cur
rent from the Falls was shut off. We
have seen nu announcement of the
date for beginning business, but
everything is now ready. New York
Tribune. .
Callfornlans buy more baseballs
and bats, proportionately, than tho
people of any other Stat.
tragedy and more than one member
of the hunting party understood It.
Nothing was killed, however; not
even the story. For weeks that mys
terious animal was forced to appear
qt all sorts of Inconvenient places,
not Infrequently at tho call of Intelli
gent citizens, whose sincerity was not
to be doubted. Many a child went to
and from school, an active sufferer
from the stories It had beard, while
not a few mothers saw their chlldrpn
start out from their homes with
pangs of uncertainty not unlike those
experienced In pioneer days.
The animal was never found: the
story never killed. It finally lasted
longer and traveled further than Is
usual, and grew a little with each
mile of travel.
Not always Is the error found on
this side of the ledger. Some years
ago a party of young men brought a
coon they had been following to bar
somewhere within the ample shades
of a big poplar out In the open field.
Knowing that the owner of the tree
would not permit them to cut it,
they sat down under It and patiently
waited until morning, when they
could see to shoot Great was their
surprise when the break of day re
vealed to them the fact that they
had over their heads not a coon, but
a wildcat of undobutetl genuineness
and generous proportions. The owner
of the tree afterward assured them
that he would gladly have permitted
them to cut It for the sake of seeing
what would have happened when the
wlldoat dropped among them.
Doubtless tbe residents of a cer
tain hamlet in northern Mercer
County, Pennsylvania, still remem
ber the excitement produced by a
bear seen a number of times In the
vicinity of a notoriously timid man's
house. Usually the apparition came
to him at night, but tbe tracks never
failed to remain in the road where
it had crossed, vivid daylight re
minders. Once or twice, when un
armed, he encountered and was
chased by the animal In the day time.
Only a small part, of the people who
heard the story knew at the time,
perhaps It may be news to some of
them even now, that the marauder
was a fake bear, arranged and ma
nipulated by a young man and a few
confederates.
In the midst of a mild "wild ani
mal" epidemic a prosperous farmer
heard a noise at his barn one night,
and hurrying on his boots, went out
to investigate. Just outside the
door a gust of wind extinguished
his lantern, and Betting It down, he
stepped inside and swung the door
shut after htm, intending to feel
his way to the stables, which would
be moderately well lighted by the
moon shining through the windows.
Almost the first step sent htm head
long into the middle of the barn
floor; he had tripped over someV ani
mal crouching where no animal had
any right to be. There was a rush
and scurry of feet, In which the
farmer took a vigorous part, rfever
stopping until he tumbled out into
the open air and banged the door
after him. Then he shouted to his
family to bring a light and a gun;
he wanted to save his stock from the
Intruder.
The gun reached him first, and im
patient lest the beast should escape
or do further damage before the light
arrived, he cautiously opened the
door and took careful aim midway
between the two eyes he could see
glurlngat him in the half light across
the floor. Just as ho was about to
pull the trigger the light of a lan
tern fell upon the crouching beast
and revealed one of his own colts
that had slipped Its halter, and tired
of Its Investigations, finally laid
down where its master soon after
ward stumbled upon it. Needless to
say, the colt was as badly frightened
as the farmer by the encounter, but
of course little know the peril it was
in while the old man was planning
its destruction. Forest and Stream.
Jim Orldcer's True Htorles Which
Nobody Believed.
The first white girl baby born with
in the Territory that is now the State
of Kansas Is living In Kansas City.
Sbe Is seventy-sis years old. She Is
Mrs. Susan A. Dillon. Her father
built the first dwelling house In West
port. "My father wa Daniel Yoacham,"
said Mrs. Dillon. "He moved from
Tennessee In 1829. He had not been
married long. My mother's cousin.
Major John Campbell, was Indian
agent at the Shawnee Indian agency,
which was a half mile east of where
tbe ruins of Shawnee mission stand.
My father and his bride cam here
and lived In that house for nearly a
year while my father was looking
around and deciding where to settle.
"In that Indian post trader's house
I was born. There lived with the
agent Captain Parks, chief of tbe
Shawnees, and many of them were
ramped around the agency. 1 was
the first white baby they had ever
seen, and they simply went wild over
me. The squaws made me moccasins
and clothing and wraps made of
1 buckskin beautifully embroidered
and decorated. They adopted roe
I Into the tribe. Until I was grown
I and had married they treated me as
I one of their own.
"My father took up a Government
claim embracing nil the land where
' Westport Is now, and much moro.
! At that time the only building in all
the territory covered by Westport
I was a little log store kept by un In
i dlan trader. My father built a large
hotel, and It was the second building
there. It stood where the corner of
Mill street and Westport avenue Is
now. It was built of walnut logs and
I waB two stories high. It was known
as Yoacham's tavern. There I lived
until I was married.
"My father was a very popular
man and much beloved. He was
known as 'Honest. Squire Yoacham."
He was the first Justice of the peace
in all this Western country. He per
formed all the earliest marriage cere
monies In this part of the country.
People came hundreds of miles to bo
married by him.
"I remember Kit Carson very well
Indeed. He came East and stopped
at my father's hotel for several
weeks. He had married a squaw of
the 'Root Eater' tribe of Indians, and
they had a little girl. He had this
little girl with him, and was taking
her back East to be educated. He
bought her outfit and had her dresses
made In our house. She came to us
dressed In buckskin and left dressed
in as fine goods as could be bought
then upon the border. She was about
my age and was uncivilized. She
pulled up all my mother's vines and
was chewing the roots when we found
her at it.
"Kit Carson wa3 a nice looking
man. of mild manners and a strong
face. All of those old pioneers were
mild-mannered men.
"Many a time I listened to old Jim
Brldger's wonderful stories of the
then unexplored West. He was ono
of tbe earliest and greatest of trap
pers, Indian fighters and scouts. He
was known In Westport as the great
est liar that ever lived, but I don't
think now that he told many lies.
One of his greatest 'whoppers' was
about a petrified forest that he had
seen away out West. We know now
that he told the truth about that,
but no one believed him then, and
I've heard many a Hugh about Jim
Bridger's 'yarn' of tbe petrified trees,
leaves and even petrified birda sing
ing lu the branches. Of course,
Bridger didn't tell all that; it was
added on by the people who heard
him talk." Kansas City Star.
A shark, measuring nearly ten feet
loug, has been raptured by a Calais
fishing boat In the English Channel.
Machines and the Men.
There is one marked difference be
tween machines aud the men who
operate them which should be noted,
says the Scientific American. Ma
chines, no matter how well they may
be cared for, depreciate from five to
ten per cent, per year, owing to the
advent of other and improved ma
chines, while men. if they are prop
erly cared for, may appreciate lu
value several hundred per cent, in
the same time. Yet as a general
rule machines and tools are nur
tured, fostered and preserved long
after their period of usefulness has
expired, whllo the permanency of
service of the men of the organiza
tion who operate them receives com
paratively no consideration whatever.
It cannot he expected that the men
of an organization will show any
loyalty to a management that openly
displays so little interest In their
welfare.
l
Vitality of Seeds.
The porslatent vitality of seeds ha
often been doubted, and, while there
is some doubt as to tho reliability
of reports of wheat taken from
Egyptian graves of ancient date ger
minating when planted, many no
table, If less wonderful, examples of
Nature's preservation of the life of
seeds come to life from time to time.
One of the most noteworthy of these
refers to seeds taken from Fort Con
ger, about 4 00 miles from tho Pole,
by the Peary party in 1889, having
been exposed in this northern climate
for a period 6f sixteen yeara, their
presence there being the result of the
Greeley ejpoditlon of 1883. Pack
ages of lettuce and radish seeds were
brought to the United States, and,
after a further period of alx years,
were planted, and, while the lettuce
seed had lost Its vitality, fully one
half of the radish seeds germinated
and grew to maturity and perfection.
Virtuous Deadwood.
For the first time in its history
there is not a single county prisoner
In the Lawrence County Jail, and the
board bill for county prisoners In
June was less than for any month
during the last thirty years.
Only a few years ago there were
forty-two licensed liquor houses in
Deadwood; last July only thirty li
censes were Issued, and this year the
number has fallen to nineteen. The
old-time wild and wooly Deadwood is
a thing of the past, and nothing but
tombstones and memory reminds one
of the days of Deadwood Dick, Cal
amity Jane, Wild Bill Hickok and
the Beauty of Brimstone Bar.
Deadwood correspondence St. Paul
Dispatch.
What's the Matter With Kansas.
Thlrty-Bevou families from Iowa
and Nebraska will locate In Lyon
County before spring, and the Em
poria Gazette says the pooicsl one Is
bringing with him 17000. Topeka
State Juurnal.
Room on Any Floor.
"Give you the only room left In
the house to-night," said Room
Clerk A, of the Baltimore, as he
dipped a pen and started to hand it
to the new arrival.
"Where Is it?" said the man from
Modeato, which they say Is another
Missouri for mules and show me peo
ple. "What floor Is It on?"
"Any floor you like; top, middle
or office."
"Don't kid me. young fellow. I
want to sleep on the top floor."
"All right. Front! Boy, put a
cot In the cage at midnight and tell
Bennie to let the elevator remain at
the top floor till morning." flan
Francisco Chronicle.
The l .in i. of Things.
A Socialist gave the other day In
a tavern some strange and ominous
statistics about kings.
"Thore have been." he said,
"about 2600 kings, rulers and em
perors of whom history takes note.
These gentlemen ruled over seventy
four peoples.
"All of them engaged at ono tlmo
or another In wa,r.
"Exactly 108 of them were exe
cuted. Death by assassination waa
the fate of 161, and twenty-eight
committed suicide." New Orleans
Times-Democrat.
Eyesight Important.
Tbe spectacled youth of poor
lyjlque Is becoming a great dc...
ua common at Sandhurst. H has
ways been a mystery that the stan
di required for eyesight Is no.
i;Tier. in theee cays of very long
rr.nga firing, Invisible uulforma and
iiual signaling, good eyesight Is of
the utmost Importance to a good ofl)
cer, and the lack of It may risk hli
men's Urea. London Turth.
THE PROMINENT C ITIZEN.
rock coat A
to his throat,,
lie In trim
lie lias to wear a long frock
I hat s Dwtoneil close up to
1U heard must nlwavs be'
hn rough-and-ready shave fnr him;
lie nas to wear a nign ailK hat.
(I wonder if he Bleeps in that?)
The Prominent Citizen.
He on the street must gravely walk;
He durst not stop to stare or talk.
His face must always wear a look
Of one who thinks thing by the bookj
Itveglasses must be on his nose.
(I wonder if he sleeps in those!)
The Prominent Citizen.
Each week ha must be interviewed,
Must air his thoughts in stately mood;
Whene'er he rides, or aits, or stands,
He muat have gloves upon his hands,
Muat. lift his gloves and Bay "Ahem!-
(I wonder if he sleeps in them!)
The Prominent Citizen.
At public meetings he must be
I j"ii the stage, where all may see
That he's prepared to stand all teste
On hia Thoughts for Our Interest.
He's always at our back and call. ,
(I wonder if he sleep at all!) J
Tbe -Prominent Citizen. T
His brow is always deeply lined,
For Public Weal is on his mind.
I wonder why he plays the game,
1 wonder what he thinks of fame.
What ever fate may hap to see
I pray that I may never be
A Prominent Citizen.
De;roit Free
51 -? .
Mistress "Did the fisherman who
stopped here this morning haver
frogs" legs?" Nora "Sure mum, I
:linnaw. He wore pants." Cornell
Widow.
Mother "There, Ethel, don't cry.
The spanking hurt mother more than
It did you." Ethel "I know It.
That's what I'm crying for." Har
per's Bazar.
Little Willie "Say, pa, what klndj
of modesty la false modesty?" Pa
"False modesty Is the kind other
people have, my son." Chicago
Dally News.
He "I have half a mind, do yon
know " Sac (soothingly)-
"Well, even that is doing right well.
I think; don't you?" New Orleans
Times-Democrat.
There was an old person of Greece, i
.Who had an attractive young niece. 1
This made her so jealous
She swallowed the bellows
And her friends had a happy release.
Life.
Mr. Jones (reading) "Another
fierce engagement in tho Philip
pines." Mrs. Jones "What 1b It?"
Mr. Jones "School teacher and
army officer." Judge.
First Artist "We must go to na
ture for our subjects. " Second Ar
tlst "Oh, that's easy, but where la
thunder are we to go for our cus
tomers?' Brooklyn Life.
Repartee. "Age before beauty.)
said Falstaff, as he attempted to
enter before the Prince. "No! Grace
before meat."" said the Prince, gent
ly, as he pushed him from his path.
Life.
Sam "Dey had a cock fight down
at Goose Hill, en dey say Pete Green
picked de wlnnah." Remus "Yeas,
de measly chicken thief stole do wln
nah en tuk it home cn picked It fob
dinnah."
Some folks can't mind their business -The
reason is, you'll find
They either have no business
Or else they have no mind.
Catholic Standard and Times.
"Do you think the methods of tho
Trusts arc strictly honorable?" "Of
course I do," answered Senator Sor
ghum. "I don't know of anybody,
that is more liberal or surer pay than
a Trust." Washington Star.
Tom "I told her I would lay tho
world at her feet." Dick "What
did she say?" Tom "8he said it
1 was that strong I ought to be get
ting 160 a week in vaudeville."
St. Paul Pioneer Press.
"And your son Is taking a cor
responding course In boxing?" "Yea,!
so he informs us." "Is he making)
much headway in hla studies?"
"Well, so far, he la only able to lick
the .stamps ' Toronto Star.
California Gallantry.
"They told me the story of a well
known gentleman of San Francisco,
who, charging through all the smoko
and flames and litter on the flr4t day,
of terror, came upon a fashionable
lady of hla acquaintance trudging
along the middle of the strent in
her bedroom slippers with a window
cortaln thrown over her shoulders.
Ho stopped his automobile to i-ffer
her his assistance, explaining at tho
same time that the auto was all ho
had saved out of the wreck and even
that had been commandeered by tho
soldiery.
"I, too, have lost all," she sighed.
"All but your beauty," said ho.
with a courtly bow.
"And you all but your gallantry."
she retorted, smiling. Sunset Maga
zine. ",
Submarines For Austria.
The announcement la .aemi-oS-clally
made at Trieste that Austria,
has decided on the adoption of t ub
marines for tbe fleet. The Holland
is the type chosen. Up to the present
Austria has held aloof, and has stead
fastly refused to experiment on har
own accouut. As a late uumlral
said: "Experiment always benett
others. We intend to be tho
'others.' " The present chief, how
ever, Count Montecucoll, deems that
the time has come for action, and
without waiting for credits, two Hol
land submarines have been ordered.
No doubt, however, is felt that tno
credits will be voted.
Youngest Telegraph Operator.
The. Wisconsin and Michigan road
claims the distinction of having tho
youngest telegraph operator In too
.world. This world wonder Is located
at Loretto in the person of Earl
Moss, who at the age of six Can send
and take measageu lrom the wlro
with perfect ease and Intelligence.
Earl is the son 'df L J. Moss, tho
operator at Loretto for tho W & SI.
road, and when tinite young sti
ii. ugbl tbe Mm so endu by hia lather.
He la quite correct lu hla manipula
tion of the key. Hie father and em
ployes of the road Kcnotally say bo
is the youngest operator they havo
Itver heard of.--lron Mountain corra
ipondence Detroit New.