New York City. The fancy blouse
with accessories of luce and the like
Is essential to correct formal dress and
Alls an Important place la the well-
WOMAN'S FANCT BtOCSE.
kept wardrobe. This charming and
stylish May Manton model hns the
merit of suiting bolh the entire cos
tume and the odd bodice. As shown.
It Is of white batiste with cream
Cluny lace and black velvet ribbon
held by small Jeweled buttons, but
the design lends itself to silk and soft
wool fabrics as well as to all the
dainty cottons and linens with equal
success.
The foundation is a Cited lining that
closes at the centre front. On It are
arranged tne round yoke, the full un
der proportion and the graceful ber
tha. The yoke closing at the left
shoulder extends to form a narrow
vest that closes under the left front.
The sleeves are In elbow length, ter
minating with flaring cuffs, but can
be extended to the hands, as shown In
the small sketch.
To cut this blouse for a woman of
medium size one and a half yards of
material twenty-one inches wide, one
and a half yards twenty-seven inches
wide, one and a quarter yards thirty
two inches wide, or one nnd a quarter
yards forty-four inches wide, will be
GIUL'S
required, with three and seven-eighth
yards of all-over lace and ten yards of
velvet ribbon to trim as Illustrated.
Drew t or a tilrl.
Dainty frocks with many tucks are
M much in style for little girls as for
their elders. The charming little May
Uunton model Illustrated in the large
(rawing is suited to mauy materials,
sad has thn merit of being childish
i ml simple at the same time that It Is
rlTectlvo in the extreme. The original
Is of flue, sheer mull with Yulcuihu
i.es lace threaded with uarrow black
velvet ri'jbou; but lawn, batiste and
(.11 the long list of white and colored
valuable fabrics might be substituted
or any one of tile simple silks and
wools.
The w.:i'it is tucked to yoke depth
nuil falls i:i soft folds below, and the
novel sleeves show tucked caps that
harmonize to a nicety. The skirt Is
simply straight gathered at the waist,
and can be made with the flounce or
plaiu as preferred. The (rimming of
luce Insertion Is applied to form Van
L)yk points and to cross the yoke
In becoming fashion.
To cut this dress for a girl eight
years of age, eight and a quarter yards
of material tweuty-oue inches wide,
live and a quarter yards twenty-seven
Inches wide, four and a half yards
thirty-two iuebes wide, or three and
three-quarter yards forty-four inches
wide, will be required, with seventeen
yards of Insertion and two pieces of
velvet ribbon to trim as illustrated.
Millinery MeIUee.
For Telling Aural trail a very flm
gosaauierllket'buntUly Is employed and
Is undeniably effective, the while it
hints at an importance somewhat lack
ing In tulle. An all white tulle Illusion
toque is sweet veiled In this same
due black chantiUy, worn well tilted
over the (yes with a great Jet butter
fly serving as a spec! tic of cache peigne
at the back. This is the very airiest,
faliiest piece of millinery coucelvable
and eminently before the hat decked
irtii inuiiy leathers In the affections
lZ tint tu.art womuu. Bizarre wings.
when found, should he made an mine,
diate possession. That these mostly
figure on the best and most exclusive
French models accounts for the long
price asked for such creations. Hut
now and again the fates alone know
how or why-out of a boxful of medio
crity there may be turned up some
thing out of the ordinary happily
passed over by hundreds of unseeing
eyes.
The flaliMliorouicli Hat.
Th Gainsborough hat Is to be seen,
big, black huts, with Irish crowns and
a big tuft of ostrich plumes at one
sicl". These hats are always good
style, or they seem to be. perhaps be
cause of the familiarity of the picture
hat, which hus become a millinery
classic.
Color on Ihn llanUkntrlilef,
A suggestion of color on the band
kerchief Is coming more and more in
general favor. Narrow hemstitched
borders of a color matching the sum
mer suit are used, ami many of the
French Initial handkerchiefs have the
letters set on a hhleld of pink, blue or
green.
Handsome ChlfTim llown.
A pretty chilTon gown, a mass of
line tucks with trimming of Cluny laee
on the waist, has uudersleeves of
tnou.sseline set with insertions of lace
and bands of silver braid. A big hat
trimmed with pink roses is worn v.ith
A Prett.T lloa.
Black grenadine ruffle, the edges all
along tipped with white ostrich feath
ers, a white nnsllu one havlug black
chenille spots, a black tulle with white
lace Insertions, are among the pretty
boas seen this season.
Storks and Belt.
No wotnau ever yet possessed a suffi
cient number of stocks, ties and belts.
No matter how large her collection,
there Is always room, and even need,
for the additional one that Is novel
and takes her fancy. The very com
plete assortment here given Includes
the soft bow, four-in-hand and butter
fly ties, plain, draped anti bodice belts.
DKKSS.
and will enable any deft needlewoman
to make half a dozen for the cost . f
oue ready made. The materiuls for
the originals are dotted silk, loulslne
silk, white mull and white pique, but
almost anything and everything is
used, and there Is ample opportunity
offered for individuality In the choice
both of materials and celur.
Tlio foundation for all- the stocks is
the same. The plain oue in the centre
is shown with the butterfly tie that ap
pears separately Just below. The four
hi hand model is trimmed with stitch
ed bands and has the tie Joined to the
lack edges, where It crosses and
pulses wind to (he front. The bow
iu..-ludi turn-over portion:,, but Is the
same familiar friend. Tbu belts are
well fitted and curve to the figure to
give a gracei'ul outline. The plaiu aud
the draped ones ure eminently simple,
but aro styli.di and fashionable as
well. Tho laced bodice Is cut In sec
tions, and tits to a nicely, and can be
closed at back or float as preferred,
made pointed or cutaway as Illus
trated. To cut the stocks with ties In the
different stylet, seven eighth yard of
material thirty-two inches wide will
be required. To cut the belts, oue
yard twenty-one inches wide will be
required.
BTOOttS AND DK.TS.
0003 AND ENDS OF DAINTINESS.
Pretty TrlHee That Add Imrtnii to the
Summar Girl's Wardrobe.
One of the chle and nseful novelties
for summer Is the "shirt waist set."
This consists of four fancy brooches,
et In gold or sliver, three of which are
uniform In size to fasten the front. The
fourth Is a trifle larger to wear at the
throat, rial n and matrix turquoise
and baroque pearls are among the
prettiest.
A charming summer fancy Is the boa
of white moussellne de sole or tulle
and cblffon, with tiny flowers sewed
liberally on the edges. They arc made
Just loug enough to fasten closely
around the throat under a huge rosette.
and have long ends of moussellne or
chiffon, accordion pleated. Violets,
forget-tne-nots, "Rambler" roses or
any other small flower may be used
with good effect.
Novel and with extreme possibilities
In the line of decorative effects are the
Persian Jackets of chamelion taffeta.
They are cut low enough at the neck
to escape all danger of Interference,
witli delicate finish of lace or tulle,
aud stop well above the belt. The
f routs curve both at upper and lower
edge, meeting almost in a point over
the chest, where they fasten with a
fancy button or under n large bow
of ribbon with long ends. Shaped
thus, the little jacket protects the most
sensitive parts of the body, the shoul
ders and chest. The sleeves are loose
and slightly bell shaped, terminating
a tittle below the elbow. The whole
is lined with n heavy silk of the same,
or a contrasting color, making suf
ficient warmth for the ordinary sum
mer wind.
Pome of the fluffy muslin gowns this
season are finished by sashes of crepe
de chine, four yards in length, which"
are tied in a large bow at the left side
of the front. In many instances they
are attached to a lining, shaped to the
figure, making a pointed girdle back
nnd front. Others are simply wound
around the waist and fastened Invisi
bly iu the proper long and straight
front effect.
Convenient and fetching nre the sets
of velvet choux made by aii ingenious
young woman. Yards of velvet bebe
ribbon are made up Into four rosettes,
one larger than the others, nnd having
numerous long, looped end's." These
nre attached to three or four strips
of the velvet about four inches apart,
the larger, however, being at nearly
double that distance from the three. lr.
the centre of each is a tiny ornament.
The set can readily be pinned on a
simple gown, when a little extra
smartness Is desired, aud add much
to its beauty. New York Tribune.
Lire In Mnnllu.
Sirs. Whilsett, the wife of Lieuten
ant George P. VVhitsett. now serving
in the Philippines, has just returned
from Manila on a brief visit to her
family. In Carthage, Kan. "There are
now,"' she says, "two hundred Amer
ican women iu Manila, for whom there
Is only one dressmaker, nnd he Is a
Chinaman. Old Sauk is his uame. und
he recently was arrested for smug,
gllng. He was to go before Lleiitcu
unt VVhitsett, as acting judge, for trial.
Sang came to me In his distress to In
tercede. So did the rest of those two
hundred American women. If Sang
was put in Jail, what would we women
have to wear? Well, you may be sure
Old Sang was let off eusy fortunate
ly, be proved himself not guilty. Bur
George, as Judge, had all kinds of
bribes offered him. Even I was offered
Filipino candy and finery by the wom
en prisoners who wanted to be let oft
lightly. We kept house the last six
mouths with several other officers'
families, euch woman taking her turn
as heud of the household for oue
month, managing the Chinese servauts,
e;c. Our food was bought, at the
army commissary. We had fresh meat
from Australia (seven days on cold
storage!, potutoes. etc., from Hong
Kong, Chiua, and our canned goods
from America. Sociully, the life Is a
pleasure. Driving ou the Lunetn. or
cool ocean beach, is the uulversal pas
time from 5 to H p. m. Once a mouth
we attend the army and navy assem
bly dance, and there were two other
(lances a month at the Oriental Hotel."
Sort Woo Ion tor Summer Cowna.
While the wujIi materials are al
ways preferable for summer gowns
for the more HUht,runiial tollvrs fr
dressy occasions, the softer woolen
materiuls are to be very much worn.
ThiMe come in the bareges, Henrietta
cloths, grenadines. Liiusilowne and
the soft silks. The trimmings ure
lace, quantities of lace, aud the finer
batiste embroideries ure sometimes
used with charming effect. For tailor
gowns white cloth of a light quality Is
stylish, with trimmings of tatietas and
liberty satin stitched und iu the silk
braids. These braids ha"e the touch
of gold in them.
For while skirts and for the yacht
ing suits or seaside morning dressing
white hop sacking is shown. It makes
a durable skirt, from which the dust
and sund can be so easily shaken uud
is made plain, with stitching only us a
trimming. As popular as well to the
white toilets for morning, noon uud
night, so are the nuts.' Whether of
lace, atraw, braid or chiffon, -bey are
pretty Dear all white, and, though try
ing tu the many, can be toued down
by a face trimming of flowers or black
velvet.
White tiudressed kid gloves are al
ways atylksh, and at the resjrta white
undressed kid shams will' be seen on
modish young women. Atlanta Con
stitution, A Feminine llwemlth,
A Western woman bus recently In
vaded a profession hitherto monopol
ized by wen, aud has become wonder
fully proficient In her art. Hue la an
amateur silversmith, and skilfully pro
duces pieces of Jewelry and other arti
cles of silver more or less ornate. It
has been Bald of her that she works
like one who has taste but not educa
tion. When possible to obtain It, nhe
i
nses the crude ore just as It comes
from the mine, but more frequently
she Is compelled to take the metal
from the rolling mills, where it ha
been melted and rolled Into sheets.
She also makes use of color In her
work, as, for example, In a heavy sil
ver twist, irregularly enamelled In
brown, which serves ns a clasp for an
ooze leather belt of the same color.
Some oddly designed silver buckles,
enamelled In strange blues and greens,
and a delicate clasp of transparent
blue enamel on a crush belt of change
able silk produce a most effective color
scheme, wllh a tendency to Irldis
cence. A set of gorgeous clonk fast
eners In copb'er, studded with brilliant
hoed enamels nnd held together with
thongs of braided leather. Is one of her
original designs, aud nuother. In strong
contrast, la a silver buckle of fanciful
Shape, hammered Into a deUeuie lace-work.
Plane a Ml Fro Hospital.
Mrs. Ethel Costello, of Kalamazoo.
Mich., Is a nurse. She has lately In
herited a fortune of 1"(X,00. Mrs.
Costello Is young nnd pretty. She bus
a little daughter. The sudden acces
sion to fortune might have been ex
pected to centre her thoughts chiefly
upon her own pleasures, but It appears
that she Is uot forgetful of the good
that wealth enables Its possessors to
do. She says:
"As a trained nurse I have seen
much of bumnti suffering and mean to
do something to alleviate the suffering
of those who may be called God's
poor. I believe 1 will endow a hos
pital for them. That is how I Intend
to give thanks for my good fortune.
"For myself, I expect to buy a yacht
as soon ns the hospital matter is set
tled and with my daughter aud some
good friends, go cruising over the
waters of the earth, where, I don't
know, but anywhere, so I sail.
Mrs. Costello Inherits her fortune
from an uncle. The property is most
ly In Honduras. She has been be
sieged by countless schemers with
plans guaranteeing to double her is
tate in n short time, but she says that
none of these persons will get a ec-'it
of her money to operate with-. Chi
cago Kecord-Heruid.
Bernhardt on Shipboard.
On arriving in Paris from her Amer
ican tour Bernhardt told her friend
that on the trip over she had never
quitted her cabin during the whole of
the time. "Not even once," she said,
'except to go to my bath In the morn
ing. I do not like to he looked nt us
If I was a wild beast, so I was care
ful not to put my nose outside the
door."
"But how did you pass the time?"
"Oh. I used to read und write nnd
chat, nnd play Sulfa and Halmu."
'And look out on the sea?"
'No, never." replied Mme. Bern
hardt, "for it is a curious thing that I
who love the sea so urdeuily when I
can look at it from a beach, simply de
test it when It Is carrying me. I abhor
It so that I cannot even look at It."
"Perhaps It Is that you nre nervous?"
"I do not think so," she replied, "for
death by drowning is the only one
which knu no terror for me." Mainly
About People.
Slorlca Told by Bracelets.
Bracelets that tell stories are among
the most Ingenious modern devices for
attaching some meuuiug to n young
girlls trinkets. "The House that Jack
Built" and the "Three Blind Mice"
have Already served ns themes for il
lustration of this sort. The bracelet
lllustrnting the former of these1 talcs
consists of a series of charms. The
rat, the bag of malt, the cat, tha dog,
the cow with the crumpled horn, all
are represented, nnd even the man all
tattered cad torn, the priest, the moitl-
en and the house Itself are not omitted.
In the story of the three blind mice
tho carving kuife is the promlueut fea
ture. Women Are Bett Taught by Women.
Womanly graces of mind and
heart are bout taught by wom
en. Nothing can uiako up for
the luck of early mother-love
and mother-care in a girl's life.
The motherless daughter knows tills
too well. It Is much the same In
schools and colleges. Girls need the
Inspiration of a high type of woman
hood always; they should have it be
fore them at college, und they should
ulso have while away from home tho
intelligent guardianship aad guidance
of women instructors who cainmaud
botli love uud respect. Ada C. Sweet,
in the Woman's Home Companion.
Whit'- mouuii' gowns ure the sliiu
qt'.a uou of smartness for out-of-towu
wear.
Lace nnd baiUle embroideries aro
the favorite trimming for foulard
gowas.
Lace jacketi;, the iiuncsfth.'ng of thn
summer, are certainly charming with
muslin or siik skirts.
Amethyst buttons are a recent
fashionable caper for fusteulug hand
some white aud light-tinted fabrics.
Flowered und dotted muslins, dimi
ties, batistes aud foulards aro the cor
rect summer materials for girls in
their teens.
Although the bolero and the laco
collars are not new, yet they are such
satisfactory trimmings they still re
tain their vogue.
Lace nnd also chJtTou bridal robes
are quite as fashionable this season
as the regulation white satin and of
tentimes much more becoming.
A soft stock of tho came material or
one of the softest white mull, with
laee trimmed ends. Is the proper neck
finish for this year's wash silk shirt
waist. Shoulder knots of ribbon matching
the soft ribbon sashes of bright hues
are tho swagger thing for Jlttln girls'
wear, accompanied by colored socks
and shoes or ankle tics of tho sauie
shade.
Fr.aclf.il iilee.es, while necessary to
a stylish gown, should b. carefully
chosen. Tho sleeve with a puff at
the elbow or breaking out at Irregular
lnterruls all tho way down the arm
is fantastic rather than pretty.
CONVEYED BY A SPARK
V1ESSACE OF THE PEACEFUL BOER
TO HIS FICHTINC BROTHER.
ftn Kncllah Correspondent Deaprlhre la
Pli-tureeqne Language Row the Brit
ish Plan Are Revealed to the
Bnrfhers In the Field.
The big fighting is over, with Its
r.adysmlths, Modder Itivers nnd
Stnrmbergs, and In its place a new
warfare has sprung up, n warfare on
the run, says the Pretoria correspond
ent of the London Chronicle. The
British are in Pretoria; they hold the
towns and the railways, uud the live
ly, waspish coiiimaniloes are active In
their endeavors to make tin- outside
country uninhabitable.
There nre In the Transvaal tranquil,
white-washed, iron-roofed dorps,
through which the trulus run twice
dally with a homely punctuality;
where shopkeepers grow fat In trade
with the big garrisons and officers Oil
comfortable billets as Provost Mar
shals. District Commissioners and
what not, which are none the less in
a state of actual siege, ho fur us their
surroundings go. In tbe streets nnd
market places. In the shops nnd pretty
houses, there is nothing save the ever
lasting topic of conversation to Indi
cate the presence of war and the prox
imity of nn armed foe. Good-natured
soldiers lounge through the place .and
guards change with a clasp and rattle
nt the corners of the streets. It looks
rnther like Germany in khaki, and the
good relations which prevail among
the townsfolk and the soldiery height
en the resemblance. Surrendered
burghers, who have burled their Sunday-best
Mausers, nnd temporarily
suspended active operations, smoke on
their stoops with an outward air of
patriarchal benevolence that discred
its caution nnd invitea good faith. To
them the Britisher, with his belts nnd
bayonets, ranks and files, stars nnd
grades, Is an ever-interesting anomaly;
a pushing creature to be tolerated to
a certain point, but to be sniped at
and rushed on proper occasion. They
come and they j, these burghers, re
garding oaths of neutrality like the
laws of the old constitution, framed
for the advantage, and not for the op
presslou of the wise men.
This is a view of the Inside. Beyond
tho pickets It Is otherwise. From the
hills which rise abruptly like Islands
standing out of the water, tlio gray,
comfortless veldt rolls nakedly to the
very skirts of the town, the skyline
Is bare and clean as the edge of a
knife, and, looking straight before one.
one seems to sr? th" rim of the earth.
An ox stalks solemnly across his graz
ing ground; he is the only moving
thlug visible between here nlad the
Kky. Au Inuofvnt outlook: n most
Innocent, outlook, fio innocent nnd
open that the eossuck post striding
slowly from one bouldr to another
nnd buck again It Is well to have
cover at hand almost permits himself
to thlult of home and tuuf girl. Iu
the Transvaal the night drops quickly;
"at one stride comes the dark!" The
twilight for the few brief minutes
that It lusts. Is exquisite. It smooths
out th? creases of tbe day. healing
wtiere the sun bus touched, easing
where the dust has stung, cooling the
brain and comforting the body. The
cossack post does think of home; he
emembcrs just fuich another evening.
Then talk wus not of wnr.
Bttt-a light, n mere spark, winks
across the miles. It might have been
a star, reconnoltcring over the edge
of n cloud before making its debut
at the dunce of the zodiac. On the
other baud, it might have been a sig
nal lamp, tin affair of- leus.es and piv
ots, the tongue of a fate. The cos
sack port's home whisks aloft to bide
a better wiilla, and his eyes nail them
selves on the point, where that light
appeared and wetit out.
He waits perhaps five minutes. Then
It dodges up again. Dot-dush. dush-dath-dot.
it says, blinking brazenly to
his very face. Tho code Is n very
strange one; nothing Is to he gathered
from watching the message. He shoul
ders his rifle, and steps briskly over
tho parched grass toward his home
side man. They are signalling to the
town, where some of the patriarchal
surrendered ones ure making the most
of their time among tho soldiers who
do not practice keeping secrets or hav
ing secrets to keep.
The light Is announced from post to
post, and a cleer young lieutenant Is
dragged from a card table to observe
what he is too clever to hopa to under
stand. They aro men of arms, thesu
soldiers, and do uot recognize the
brain ns a fighting unit yet! That
will come, but ou!y oftnr the r.K:;t b!g
licking.
Meauwhlle, a dear old boy with a
most lK-ticvolcut br.-.rd. nnd owning
to sixty years, dei.plte his straight
hack and keen eye und fresh check,
Is leaning out of a window Watching
a lump Hushing through the darkness.
Ills name Is IVtrus Johannes Coetzes,
and he has four sons on commando
and three more buried clown by the
Tuge'.a. Hia wife aud married daugh
ters arc out yonder on the farm, pro
tected from plunder iiumI insult by the
fiut of Great Britain, an 1 their eggs
and poultry ore very comforting to
the poor fellows out in the hiils with
their rilles. His cattle, It is true, were
commandeered by an irresponsible
brigadier, racing northward with his
column to Join French, but who, nev
ertheless, found time to leave a receipt
In full, Insuring generous payment.
And Petrua Johannes Coetze.i finds
the British officer very affable n.id
sympathetic, and takes great Interest
iu the army uews that . be hears.
His fiieutW outside carry ou un af
fectionate correspondence wiih hlui.
Ou their side there la tho hello and
siLiial lamp; on the other that marvel
ous machine, the Kaffir telegraph.
Katbrs nre vermin, as we know, and
luimti lower iu the scale of creation
than the oxen they tend. This we
have on authority of the Boers, who
ought to know for they have hunted
I hem, fought them, killed tueui, used
them, nnd learned them loutf slueo.
But thn Boer has taught us us little
of the Inwardness of tho Kaffir as of
tho Kourees of his armament. , Wo
work tho Kaffir bodily: the Eocr
kuoivt how to enslavo his soul.
n KmI!.' walks out of the town to
vriirJ .uiu In tho dlrecilou of the ''lo
tHlioi:.'' Mire than likely be Is very
liue Ku.Ur, wuh the limbs nnd trunk
ct nn An'iu'jiis and a face of human
wtclligi :ic. . Ho saunters, with the
peculiar Kaffir swing of tlte body,
aloug the edge of the gutter, for he
has no place, by the. adopted law of
the land, on the sidewalk and passes
unobserved everywhere by the man
with the gnn. Perhnps a policeman In
khaki and spurs stops him to Inspect
his pass, or unless he be labelled hu
man, he Is mere stray cattle. But
that document Is in exemplary order.
He Is In the employ of Brothers,
as laborer, nnd lives In the location
whither he goes.
But before morning that Kaffir Is
eating freshly killed beef and mealies,
in the laager ou the hills, while Com
mandant Vnn der Wcstlmlzen eagerly
pernsfe a certain letter extending over
several sheets of paper. And Pet run
Johannes Cottzeo, In his bedroom In
the town, looks over his pipe bowl and
lifts up his eyes to the hills whence
coineth a certain message In dots and
dashes from n lamp, advising receipt
of his communication of even date.
Nevertheless, the Intelligence depart
ment offers to hammer you In two
rounds If you make any referetio
"Incus a mm lucendo."
HORRORS OF JOURNALISM,
(Jonnililrnin Itnut Betnren llrare ol
Kdllorlal Hhnrp4.
"If you haven't nnythlng else to do,"
suggested tne Information editor, with
a yawn, "you might tell me what you
conceive to lie the difference between
shaving around a ino!e ou your chiu
and carving a roast rabbit."
"One Is a rather particular shave
and the other is it choice hare-cut,"
retorted the exchange editor. "What
Is tho dlf "
"Nothing of the sort. In the oue
case you have a cure and Iu the other
you carve a hare."
"Merely a hale-splltting distinction.
What's the difference between a prop
pHy cooked Hudson Itivcr fish aud a
beginning In the stock market?"
"That's easy. Oue is :i pickled shad
and the other is a cooked goose."
"Not nt nil. You are losing your
grip. The other is .1 gudgeon ou the
board."
"Scaly. There's a better reason
thau thnt. They leave all the bones
of the one nnd they take all the bones
of the other. Kat more fish. It's brain
food and you need It. Speaking of
food, what did the squeezed shorts eat
the other day?" "
"Mum! Bull pie."
"No. Saw Sage.-
"If you don't like It you can slump
"Don't get In a flury. What's tho
difference between chicory and square
dealing?"
"One's bogus coffee und the other's
honest tea. Why Is n current report
like the inmate of a boarding house?"
"Ilccaii.se It's n rumor. But here's
a big difference. One flies but can't
kick mid (he other kicks, but can't
fly. Why Is an nnol' nt Mexican chef
"Like a hot tamiile m,.kcr of to-day?
He was au Aztec cook. Awful! When
wai th? first prize fight?"
"When the lion and unicorn fought
for a crown. What Is "
"No! o! It was when Lucifer went
down to avoid punuhuieut."
"Well, he dlo'n't avoid It, Just the
same.. What's the difference between
an Ice peddler "
"And a custom ho'tse officer? One's
uu iceman si ml the other's an excise
man. How would you get up a church
trust?" t
"Start en amen corner. Why Is a
skeleton In a closet---"
"It's the Anatomy of Melancholy.
What's the reason why Englewood
"Because- Pavld Ward Wocd. How
docs Governor Yates "
"He Yates with his fork."
It was at this point Unit the railroad
editor threatened to sit down on them
If they didn't quit. Chicago Tribune.
General Ilavelock't ClinracterUtie.
Huvelock was sixty-two years ol
age when the great, chance of his life
came to him. A little man, priui
erect, nlert, quick footed, stern-feat
tired, with snow-white mustache urn
beurd. Huvelock, no doubt, hud h'.i
limitations. A strain of severity rai
through his character. "He was al
ways." says one who served unJci
him, "as sour as If he had swallowed
a pint of vinegar, except when he wai
being shot at. uud then he waa at
blit'ie us a sohcrlboy out for a holi
day!" There Is a touch of burlesque
of co;;rs. la that sentence, butjlave
lock wus uj doubt austere of temper
Impaiiciit o.' fco'.n aud hud a will th-r
moved to its end witli something o:
tbi5 fiery hasio und woru of obstaclei
proper to a cannon ball. He was fond
loo, of making Napoleonic orations ti
his men, and had a bigb-pjtciied voici
which could uiuke itself audible to i
regiment. Aud thn British soldier li
fighting mood Is rulher npt to bu liu
pailcul; of orutory. But Ifavelock wui
a trained .'mil scientific soldier, utMa
clous and resolute In the highest Uo
greu; a deeply roliglous muu, with i
sense of d:i;y of the antique sort, ilia
scorucd ensj nnd reckoned life, Miiei
weighed ngtthist honor, ns a men
grain of wind-blowu dust, and Have
lock, boiiiehow. Inspired in his men i
touch of that s'.evnuoss of valor w
iiKsoclute with Cromwell's Ironsldcs.
Vhe C'oruhlll.
Vlfttliig CartlM ou a Tree.
Near tjuni.i OrvJ, Cal., a grove o(
giant redwoods Is visited daily b
tourists from many climes. Soun
time in tho dim past the iudlvidua,
who likes to deface famous places b;
carving bis Initials with his knife, o,
tracing his name with a Wad peucl
cuuie here, but owing to tho nature o
tbe Ire -us there was uo place on whicl
ho could leaiv a record of his visit ll
his usual way.
Nothing dnuuied he took his bmI
ness card and vacked it on to "Jumbo,'
as the largest tree, of the grove I
called. Othurs oi his elk followed, am
showed their appreciation of hi uc
tiou by doing likewise, until now th'
monarch of the redwoods lias lonj
hundred of pasteboards tacked on o
stuck into the bark. They do not ea
any famous names. Leslie' Weekly.
A Mealuaa Opinion.
Tti.a At-,. ?"IMI i,ifluB In th. FT..1
... ... (tv ,..?, ou.tawta . . inn I'lll
ted ti:x:t, which Is nearly one write,
of book per '10,000 of tho population
All the Uew bosks, if you be.ieve til!
publishers. nr: i iioch iiuiklni.'." If the
are not "brilliant an:l vital." They'i
u no I'aeii in i on paper puip liiacliln
urv lu a vcor or t j. Munlcuu. HciulJ
THE WORLD'S WOfcS.
This world's n endless vale of woe,
7hera man but wakes to sigh:
Contentment never yet was found
Below the arching sky.
The thin man mourns bemuse the flesn'
Is thin upoa his bones ;
Tlw lady with the double chin
Looks in her glass and groans.
The childless man would give bii all
To have a little one;
The man with seven boyn would be
O'erjoyed if ho had none.
A down beatrenlia he maiden's lip,
Therefore she mopea about;
The atrong man's heart is sore because
. His hair is falling out.
Chicago ltecord Herald."
"Is Mr, Petcrsby rich?" "I don't
think so. He dresses too fashionably."
Tlt-Blts.
He (reverently) "You are the only
girl I have ever loved." She "Ah!
What lots of fun you have ahead of
you!" Puck.
Her Father "What are his business
prospects?" Miss Heights (naively)
"Thnt I do not know. I only know he
means business." Brooklyn Eagle.
For a happy coincidence.
I ray, remark tins;
How happily mis, rhymes with
"Kiss'' and witli 'iilisu."
Philadelphia .Record.
"It was understood that the enshier
had been a lamb In Wall Street."
"Therefore," said I, with a huppy
Fmlle, "he skipped." Indlaunpolls
News.
"Is he a criminal lawyer?" "Well, I
should hardly call him a criminal,
though some of his practices come
very close to being feloules." Town
and Country.
Circus Manager "Whnt's all that
row in the dressing room?" Attend
ant "Oh, the man who walks bare
foot on swords ran a splinter lu his
foot." Ohio State .Journal.
It is wise, of course, uot to exhibit
your ignorance by asking questions,
but it is still wiser not to compel other
people to exhibit their ignorance by
asking them questions. Brooklyn Life.
Ihe man who doth procrastinate
Kometimea ia not loiind worrying,
lie hires some chap of small ohite
And lets him do Ilia hurrying.
Waaliinuton fetar.
"Black yor boots?" grinned the
young anthropoid ape. "Go ou!"
growled the taveniau, "Don't try uny
of your monkey shines ou me." The
phrase then begau to thunder down
the ages. Pacific Unitarian. '
"Amateur Gardener (to goat-fancying
neighbor) "HI, madam! One of your
confounded pots hus got Into my gar
den, and is eatiug my bedding-plants!"
Neighbor "Good gracious! 1 trust
they nre not poisonous!" riinch.
"Who Is that quiet individual whom
the guests seem to avoid?" "Oh, he'
a famous composer of classical music."
"And thnt young man who seems to
be the lion of the evening?" "Why,
he's a rag-time piano player." Ohiu'
State Journal.
"I am sorry for you, my boy," said
tho old man. "I feel certain hut
you ure about tiK wed a woman who
does not know how to cook." "It
might be worse, father," answered the
ycttug mnu. "She litis promised never
to try to leurn." Tlt-Blts.
As they reached the comer he turued
and whistled find then called "Here,
Collar Button!" As the puny little
terrier came skurrylng up, bis com
panion said: "Why on earth do you
call your dog that?" "Why." replied
the proud but worried owner, "just
because he'geui iosl so easily " jallit.
delphia Press.
A l'flnlc 8torjr Vrom London.
. Vermicelli cut Into little letters is a
thlug commonly found in modern soup.
But It is not often that it saves a man
from fiuancial disaster, as it did lu
the following case: Au American vis
iting England was diui'ii; In London
the other day during I ho height of the
Wall Street boom. Tho tulk turnod
ou that subject, nnd the American,
who had bought largely at high figures,
maintained, against tho seuernl opin
ion, thnt the great prices rested ou a
solid business basis. Suddenly he
saw in the spoonful of soup which he
was raising to his lips four letters'
forming the word "Sell." Somewhat
sliakeu by this. for. he was a muu of a
supci'Mtltioui turn- of inliul, he went
on with his soup iu it troubled ljiiud
until only six of tho small white' capi
tals remained flouting in bis phi to.
They spelled the word "l.'nioad."
Hastily rising he excused himself upon
n pica of indisposition, find took a call
to tho nearest open telegraph office. Ho
cabled to his broker, ordering the Im
mediate hale of all ho held lu railways.
As New York time is live hours behind
our own, llm thing wits done before the'
liiuvke.t closed. The net day thj pau
1c began. He hr.d got' out at thu top
of the Yjinrkst. Loudon New.i.
A Tribute to UuiIki'i l'nevrj.
In response to ti pumruph in .uturo
catling uttentiou to thu propyl to
erect i memorial to Profosoi- Hux
ley, the ediior recently received twenty-five
cents, accompanied by uu an
onymous letter, from which he pub
lishes the following cxtiucts:
Iu Nature tbe reader is iuloruied of
a movement-ou foot lu L'ullu;j lor a
memorial to the memory of Huxley,
With gladness I b'utou to couuilnuo
my inltc. I enclose a posiul
order for Is. a ftuiu little help toward
tbe memorial. Even uow 1 a in giv
ing beyond my means, as I am merely
a casual dock laborer, llviug liom baud
to mouth, ami often hardly able to
make both ends meet, lint 1 never let
my iqlnd get rusty, aud from my boy-,
hood have had a kccu partiality' for
nature's leadiug lights aud their vi orl:.
Among the brightest of thesu Dili of
whom uny nation might ba Justly
p.'oud, flushes out Thomas Henry
Huxley."
' AM-liUon till In ir ri.rl.o-e.
An Atchison girl who it la locL for
the seventh tlmo sajs alio docsu't
notice nay Cillerence in the ntttuks,
except that she calculates more thun
she used to If tho trouble In lulling her
Luir is gulus to uav. Atehiwoo Globe.