Oo"to a paiinisfwhen you are bine, and you'll come away a happier man, says a writer. Anyhow, you'll make the palmist happier. Ex-Premier Crispi of Italy is re ported as saying that "great danger is threatening the principles and in* stitutious of the Latin peoples." Majors and captains will be as com mon in this country at the close of the present war as admirals in Spain and colonels in the Bine Grass region. The resignation of Spain's secretary of the colonies may have been caused by the fact that the near future prom ises to make the position a compara tive sinecure. It is told without shame in Maine that an amateur photographer of Waterville took a snap shot at a friend who had lost his balance and fallen iato a lake, before going to the rescue. Cricket in Australia is suffering from the rooters in Australian "bar rackers," bleaeheries. Mr. Stoddard, whose English team has returned home after a serie3 of defeats by the Australians, complains that at every match a portion of the public hooted the players, Englishmen and Austral ians alike. Associate Superintendent of Schools William L. Felter of Brooklyn claims that the handwriting of the future will not be a verticle hand, but a round hand, with a slant off the ver tical from ten degrees to twenty de grees. Investigation shows that this is the style written by business men. These writers were taught the old slant. 'lhey have worked up to a slant of about seventy-five degrees. Why have they not gone up to ninety degrees ? Because they could not do 6o and preserve the essential element of rapidity. The surgeons who have been mak ing examinations of the members of the militia volunteers will make re ports that will be apt to discourage, though it may not extinguish the bi cycle habit, and particularly the low handlebars. It is said at the medical department of the army that a great lumber of the volunteers who have oeen rejected for physical disability ire bicycle riders, who, by that vio lent exercise, have developed diseases of the heart and spine which unfit them for exposure or endurance. These troubles are said to be con fined almost entirely to riders who use low handlebars and lean forward in the saddle. This position not only induces curvature of the spine and ether diseases in that part of the anatomy, but causes the other organs to crowd the heart out of its place, and produce irritation which ultimately becomes chronic. As soon as they have an opportunity to do so, the ex amining surgeons will be called upon for reports on this subject. There are some questions which, like the poor, we have always with us. One of them is the perennial and well-worn query as whether women have a sense of humor, remarks the Philadelphia Bulletin editorially. A New York newspaper prints letters on the subject from half a dozen women prominent in various walks of life, in cluding Maud Adams, Emma Thursby aud the president of the New York f-itate Woman'# Christian Temperance Union, which declare that women have humor, though they point out that, owing to the conventional re strictions upon their behavior, their Bense of the humorous finds less free expression than that of man. The New York Post says that these women are right, aud that it is as foolish to ask if women have humor as it would be to ask if they have a sense of pathos or a knowledge of right aud wrong. As normal human creatures, with faculties, perceptions and emo tions of the race of wh!ch they consti tute one-half, they possess humor just as they possess other attributes of humanity. The old theory that women were in some peculiar aud mysterious degree essentially different from the masculine portion of mankind is no longer dominaut among intelligent people. The enlightened modern tendency is to consider a woman as neither a queen to be worshipped nor as a slave to be driven, but as a thor oughly responsible, fully equipped human being, who should be held to the same degree of accountability as man. It is true that there have been no great women humorists entitled to rank with Cervantes, or even with Mark Twain; but this proves nothing. Woman's humor is likely to be of a finer, less robust character thau that of man, and she is seldom able to ap preciate a joke against herself. But any man who declares that women do not possess both wit and humor is blteid to some of the most obvious facts of life. .England confers the title of second Nelson on Dewey. To the world be is the first Dewey. That title will stand to the end of time. The Philippines produce the finest indigo in the world, but it isn't so blue as the feeling that the American squadron has produced there. There are in England and Wales 200,000 children so defective in men tal power that they are incapable of fighting the battles of life if left to themselves. According to the American consul at Sydney, Australia, "American trade has been the meaus of emancipating the Australians from the time honored (tyranny of the silk hat." The recall of Japanese troops from Wei-hai-Wei has followed the final payment of the Chinese indemnity. The harbor, with its forts, now passes under lease to Great Britain. As the place is a much better rendezvous than Port Arthur of Talienwan and of stategic value, the Russians have not gained any such advantage over their rivals as was indicated in the first an nouncements. Kingsley's doctrine that "men must work and women mnst weep" finds disapproval in the case of the families of Captain Robley D. Evans of the lowa and Captain Henry C. Taylor of the Indiana. The daughters of both families, Mrs. Charlotte Evans Marsh and her sister, Miss Virginia T. Evans, with Miss Mary V. Taylor, are receiving instructions in the naval hospital at Fort Monroe to qualify as trained nurses during the war. Women have something to do nowadays more important thau posing as Niobes. It is a remarkable fact that our naval heroes have seldom been honored with prominent politi.-al office after the achievement of tjieir victories. We have had several soldier presidents, but no sailor executive, yet we talk about the ship of state. What more natural than to put a sailor at the helm? How does it happen that Farra gut and Porter never became promi nent in civil life, while so many gen erals of distinction held political posi tions at Washington after the war ? asks the Providence Journal. One by one our old poetic idols are being shattered by the utilitarian aud practical of the fiu-de-siecle woman doctor. The latest iconoclast is re sponsible for the asseveration that what is so poetical in poetry and the old novels about the whiteness of the skin, means something not so poetical. It is due, she says, to the languor of the muscular tissues throughout the body, and the slowness and languor that was so often characterized as a charm ing feminine attribute is associated with indigestion, aud is therefore j thoroughly unromantic. It is one of . the ironies of life that women as thej stand in literature aud romance art i not true to life. It has been recently suggested that advantage should be taken of this in ternational brush to attempt a practi cal solution of the tramp question, says the Washington Star. The prop osition is that these wandering ne'er do-wells be drafted into the service oi the United States, uniformed, drilled, armed, and sent to Cuba to form part, at least,of the first army of invasion. It is urged that those tramps who seek to shirk this unpleasant duty will naturally "take to the woods" thus completely ridding the commun ities that they have infested of a seri ous nuisance. The military demands of the government, however, are too serious to permit the assembling of i corps of untraiue.l, unmilitary, un ambitious, and possibly unpatriotic men to be relied upon for dangerous duties. The best fighters are those taken by their country from the ranks of the producers, the men with a con scientious desire to serve the nation, who are energetic both in times of peace and war. The greatest econo my in warfare lies in producing a maximum of results with a minimum of men. The mere aggregation ol people into ranks is not generalship. The tramp problem lies' deeper than this. It is not to be solved by a geu eral conscription, unless it be intend ed to enter upon a virtual ssheme of extermination, which is so utterly for eign to American doctrine, and so an tagonistic to the principles upon whict the war of intervention is being waged against Spain. If the solution lies is the line of employment let the trampi be drafted to work on the roads. Good roads are needed. Labor must be had to build them. While the wai is in progress the stay-at-home tourists of the highways might profit bly be set at work putting their favor ite lines of travel in fine modern con dition. RALLYING ROUND THE FLAG.' From the North and South and East and Each free man knows his State's bright West— star From city, (arm and plain— Shino9 in Old Glory's folds, Loud comes a cry—will never rest— And whether he be near or far For vengeance unto Spain. Allegiance ever holds. The call knows never stop nor pause And if for men you shout or call Throughout the mighty land; In millions they'll reply; Dut rising for a common cause For that old flag, which floats for aU, ltings out the chorus grand. 'Twould be their pride to die. With "Yankee Doodle" "Dixie" swells Then rally 'round the flag once morel With no discordant notes, East, West and North and South! And Northern cheers and Southern yells Fight as our fathers fought of yore Come from ten million throats. E'en to the cannon's mouth! The Eastern man forgets to boast, Fling out the Stars and Stripes on high, The Westerner to brag. And when we deal with Spain But one cry's heard from coast to coast— Let these words be our battle cry: 'Tis "llally 'round the flag!" "Remember, boys, the Maine!" lIN THE BAYS OF THE REVOLUTION. I * X A BRAVE SOUTHERN WOMAN WHO SAW HER HOME AND POSSESSIONS INVADED BY A BRITISH HOST USED HER WIT AND COCR- W AGE IN BEHALF OR HER HUSBAND. d the pea nuts and candy and the merry-go round. " "But the games and races are the most fun," said Albert. "You forget the fireworks," said Alice. "Yes; and the firecrackers," said Paul, "ami all the flags." "1 think we'd better take a vote on it," said Miss Smith. Four voted for the procession, seven for the firecrackers and flags, seven for the games and races, nine for the fireworks, and thirteen for the ice cream and lemonade, the nuts and candy and the merry-go-round. "How would you have voted, Miss Smith?" some of the children asked. "Well," said Miss Smith, "it's hard to decide, and I believe I should have voted as little Sammy did, for he held up his hand every time." Original Declaration of Independence. The original Declaration of Inde pendence is in so dilapidated a condi tion that nowadays it is rarely if ever exposed to public view. Exposure to light and the process of making a duplicate copy of the declaration have faded the ink in the historic document, but it is still legible. Some of the signatures are nearly faded out. John Hancock, however, seems to have used an imperishable ink, for his name stanks black and bold on the parch ment, which is now kept in a steel safe, out of the sunlight and out of public view. llar