Republican news item. (Laport, Pa.) 1896-19??, April 28, 1898, Image 8

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A i'uiry Mitory t©r the Childher.
Sure, childher, 'tis a larng tolme
since I tould yez a fairy shtory. An'
it's wondherin* I am if I Iver tould
yez about Lucky Larry Lonnigan. Be
me sowl thin, an', he was th' caution
to cats. Egobs, sorra bit of bad luck
'u'd set upon him at arl at arl. He
lived in that paart of Oireland that yez
can't find on the map.
Whin he was a young lad about six
teen the fursht of his good luck fell up
on him, an' the way of It waß this way:
Egorry, an' a vi'lent, crass woman was
his mother, always boxln' his ears for
no thing at arl, an' so wan day whin
Larry med the innerclnt observashin
that divvle a bit more wood would be
cut up, th' ould woman ralched out
her oogly roight hand an' gev' him a
"An' is it a cuff ye gev me?" says
he, rubbln' his ear, an' wid that he
leps out of the doo-r an' starts fer
town. Now some byes would ha' cried
at resavlu" the cuff, but Larry was not
the cryin' kind, but beln' of a shrewd
timperamintality he noticed that the
cuff had a handsome button in it, an'
he thought he'd take it an' sell it to
the jewelery man that I tould yez
about one toime. An' egobs! the jew
elery man gev him two shillln's for it
Well, Larry felt that rich that he wlnt
to the fair at Lantrlm, in the county
of Buscobble.
'Tis the fine booths they do be hav
in' at that fair, an* Larry soon spint
the whole of his money until he had
but a happenny. An' wid that he
bought a beautiful peach.
An' thin he tharght what a big
omadhaun he was to be spindin' arl
his money upon the belly of him. For
it was cakes an' pies an' sweets was
inside of him till ye could not rist.
Well, he wint on atin' mechanical loike
an' wid his moind annywhere but in
his head till he kem to the pit. 'Twas
the fursht paich he'd iver aten, an' the
pit surprised him. But he'd haird till
of the fortunes made in pits an' wld
out so much as sayin', "Here's an' aisy
dear, to you," he wint down in the pit
widout a light. 'Tis as brave as a
sparrer, he was.
Egobs! childher, 'tis lucky he was,
for he found that at the bottom of the
pit was a mine of soft coal; coal that
soft it would plaise yez to bump ag'inst
it, an' he kem up to the mouth of the
pit, an' seein' an English capitalist
handy, he sold him the roight to mine
in it for noine hundhred an' no-inety
noine yairs for a hundhred thousan'
Tale of TITO Citizen*.
"Hoskins, lend me a dollar, will you?
T want to buy some postage stamps. 1
came away from home carelessly this
morning, with only 25 cents in my
pocket, and that went for lunch at
"Sorry, Lusk, but I've got only
enough money to pay my carfare
A few hours later.
They met again—accidentally.
At the box office of a theater where a
sparring match was on the bill of fare
for the evening.
"It seems to me, Hoskins," stiffly re
marked Lusk, as he threw down a sil
ver dollar and picked up the bit of
pasteboard the ticket-seller gave him
in exchange for it, "that this is no
place for a man who has only enough
money to pay his car fare home."
Having exchanged the dollar he held
in his band for a similar pasteboard,
Hoskins turned to his friend.
"Lusk," he said, in a tone of mingled
sadness and reproach, "if you paid out
all the money you had for lunch, and
couldn't even buy a postage stamp,
what the St. Louis are you doing
What She Xeetled.
She was looking over a fashion pa
per when he entered.
"Trying to make up your mind what
you ought to have?" he asked.
"No," she replied; "I know what I
ought to have."
It is always unsafe for a man to jest
with his wife upon any subject con
nected with raiment and such things.
He knows that now.
A Woman an Saw Mill Hand.
"A brawny woman clad In blue cot
tonade waist and skirt, who is able to
run a saw mill engine as well as any
man in the business, is rather an un
usual sight," said Walter Wade, of
Louisville, Ky., "but that is Just what
I saw In a Tennesse woods a few
weeks ago. The female engineer's
name is Annie Fables, and she told
me she had been doing a 'full hand's'
work at the mill for six years. Five
years ago she decided she could run
the engine, and the mill boss told me
she had been one of the most careful,
as well as one of the most competent
he had ever seen.
"Mrs. Fables lost her husband six
years and a half ago, and a few months
afterward she asked for a place In the
mill where her liege lord had been
employed. She began working as an
off-bearer, and in a year and a half
was putin charge of the monster
piece of machinery which furnished
motive power for the large circular
and straight saws. She has all along
earned a man's wages and has been
able to support and give her seven
fatherless little ones a good common
school education. She Is fond of the
hard labor, and has lost but five days
during her connection with the mill,
and 1 then-she was ministering to ft
sick child,"
Tlieir Treatment of W«>men in strung Con
trast With the American Cuntwiii.
The generosity, as entertainers, with
which Americans treat women is in
strong contrast with the custom of
Germans. In their own country they
have no hesitation in intimating to
their female companions that they arc
expected to pay their share. In Ger
many, if a roan's feminine partner at
a public ball desires a portion of ice
cream. he will bring it with a dev.
mand of "Forty pfennige, if you
please." An instance is narrated in
the New York Sun in the experience
of some Englishwomen at a Prussian
military ball given by the officers of
a certain garrison. The price of the
supper was printed upon the invita
tion. The Englishwomen expected
that the officers who accompanied
them would pay for the refreshments.
They were quickly undeceived, for,
after supping, the money was demand
ed, and they were compelled to liqui
date the debt. A Frenchman, on the
other hand, is extremely punctilious
in not permitting a woman to pay for
anything while she is in his charge;
in fact, he is apt to overstep the
bounds of delicacy in his erapresse
ment. Woe to him, however, who in
vites ladies to dine at a fashionable
Fiench restaurant and through care
lessness has not the wherewithal to
pay for the meal. It is in such an
emergency that the brutality and in
solence of the French restauranteur are
completely revealed. In New York,
in such a case, in restaurants of the
higher class, the word or signature of
a visitor, if he be well-appearing, will
usually be accepted.
llow Chicken* Saved a Stccre's Life.
On Oct. 20 last, James Hourlc, Vice
rresident of the Franklin Savings
Bank of Frederick, Md., advertised
that a young steer had strayed away
from his farm, tenanted by Harlan
Ramsburg. Nothing was heard of
the animal and it was given up for
lost, until Feb. 8, one of the colored
men noticed several hens frequently
going in a hole in a straw stack in
the barnyard. Thinking they had a
nest, he crawled in about fifteen feet
in search of the eggs. He came out
much quicker than he had gone in, de
claring the stack was haunted, as
something had kicked him. Another
man was sent into investigate and
he came out exclaiming that some
thing was alive in there, as he felt a
hairy leg, and it had also kicked his
An investigation was then made and
a large hole cut in the straw stack,
when the missing steer was actually
found under the straw, where it had
beeu Imprisoned for ninety-nine days
without food or water excepting the
straw which it had subsisted on, as
it had made a hole about ten feet
square in the stack. The hands on the
place now recalled the fact that on
the second day's threshing they had
observed the steer standing against
the stack which had been made the
first day and saw the straw falling
over the animal, but thought it had
moved away. When rescued it was
very weak and emaciated, but is doing
very well now, being fed on boiled
ltlllioiiK of Ton* of Oxygen.
Persons who happen to be incon
venienced by dearth of anxieties are
invited to agitate their spirits by con
templation of the prospect of a short
age of oxygen in the atmosphere. It
seems that there are well-informd
persons, Lord Kelvin among them,
who find reason to believe that this
calamity is impending. The figures
(estimated) in the case are that the
world uses annually six and a half
billion tons of oxygen for breathing
purposes, and nearly half as much for
fires. This is a big consumption. To
repair it we rely on vegetation, which
we are pretty constantly restricting.
So we use more and more oxygen all
the time, and make less and less. No
wonder Lord Kelvin says the earth
is undergoing "a steady loss of oxy
As yet, though the atmosphere does
not show it, &nd it may be a few thou
sand years yet, before the difference
will be measurable. To the short
sighted the prospect may not seem
distressing, but folks who need anx
ieties should not neglect this one,
since, after all, in anxieties and an
cestry and such things a little re
moteness does no harm.
Only the Clock Stopped.
"Don't you suppose it's the weather,
Ezra?" said Mrs. Billtops, looking up
from her sewing at Mr. Billtops, who
had Just started up the clock that stood
on the mantlepiece, and who had won
dered as he shook it why it had stop
ped. The minute she spoke Mr. Bill
tops wondered why he hadn't thought
of that himself, and he proceeded to
say that he thought it was very like
ly; that the clock needed oiling any
way; that it had got kind o' gummy
and sticky, and the fall in the tem
perature was just enough to harden
that gummy stuff around the bearings
and stop it.
Mrs. Billtops didn't say anything to
this; she just let him goon and talk;
in fact, she rather liked to hear him
talk; and as for herself, she was sat
isfied to be the one that made the
wheels go 'round without insisting en
being seen at the crank.
But after the tall; was all over she
wound the clock.
Kn«y to Make n Fire.
To light the fire In a stove at any
desired tim> an absorbent roller is se:
at the top of an inclined surface, tc
be ignited and rail under the fire bo.\
when set in motion by the clock me
Doing Good.
Goodness la an attribute that la noi
only a resident of the soul, but Its
quantity and quality are determined
by its manifestations. It cannot live
unless It does —It must be doing. Nor
does It wait the bidding of those who
crave its display. It asks permission;
It seeks opportunities. We all pray
that we may be good, but what Is our
motive? Is it simply that we may en
joy It ourselves? It is a delightful
state of heart and mind, greatly to be
coveted, richly to be enjoyed; but it
prompts us to be doing, exercising the
virtue. Nor is It a difficult task—
rather a pleasant duty; while, on the
other hand, those who go the'round of
official duty In a perfunctory and me
chanical style find those duties Irk
some and distasteful, and the service
lacking the proper and right motive
Is more of a burden to others than to
themselves. We must do good for the
love of it, and though not as wisely
done as some think, perhaps for lack
3f experience, it might be better done.
But the spirit In which it is done more
than compensates for the order of Its
doing. If one has the goodness he
will learn how best to use It.
Unrecognized Answers.
Sometimes by unrecognized answer
God makes reply to special prayer.
You pray, and apparently nothing
comes of It. But as the days go you
find that surely something has come
Df it. The causey of your trouble have
dissipated slowly, perhaps, but stead
ily and really. You have been an
swered, though at the time you knew
t not. —Wayland Hoyt.
It Is n MUtul e.
To sleep exposed to a direct draught
at any season; to imagine that what
ever remedy causes one to immediate
ly feel better, as alcoholic stimulants,
for example, is good for the system
without regard to the after effects; to
eat as if you had oniy o minute In
which to finish the meal, or to eat
without an appetite, or to continue af
ter It has been satisfied to gratify the
taste; to give unnecessary time to
certain establinhed routine of house
keeping, when it could be much mora
profitably spent in rest or recreation.
I Tested and 1M i
j For 25 Years j
tg Would you feel perfectly
iu safe to put all your money
£ in a now bank ? One you
& have just heard of? '*i
a But how about an old
£ bank ? One that has done
• business for ovir a quarter
V of a century? One that ha 3 >'
{£ always kept its promis&s? *2
" One that never failed ; novor >4
fc' misled you in any way ?
K You could trust such a bank,
5 couldn't you? >1
M -2
like such a bank. It has novor
J- disappointed you, never will, fe
te is has never deceived you, #
never will. 5
jjj' Look out that someone #
V does not try to make you ,*
5! invest your health in a new 2
J 1 tonic, some new medicine
you know nothing of.
50c. »nd $1.00; all druggists. ,%
»' SCOTT & BOWNE, Chtmists, New York. *
fc 4 « "
Do you Appreciate Values?
If so, I can readily do business with you. Cal), and I can
fill your order to your entire satisfaction.
Vly Spring and Summer Line is Complete.
Caeimere Suits, $4.50 to 88.00.
Worsted Suits, §5.50 to 20.00
Serge Suits, 5.00 to 10.00. Clay Suits, 4.00 to 18.00.
Also an attractive line of
Gents Furnishing" Goods.
Hats, caps, light wool and gauze underware, umbrellas, trunks,
traveling bags and valiccs. Call and see the largest line of
clothing in Hits part of the country.
J W CAEOIJI-.' 2KM 0 """' Dushore, P
. .7. Gurrer JUrae««. Price, SIO.OO. Wa»on«. Send for larCT. fr» JtoCOOSorrey. Price. wllhcurtalna.lamM, ma.
As cood OJ win torsa. Catalogue of ail out ItJflM. •hade, apron and wodcr., (00. il(o*lUMlliMr (M.
Stomach trouble is the common
name applied to a. derangement of
the system which i3 keenly felt but
vaguely understood. It may mean
inability to retain food or to digest
it. It may mean nausea, pain iu'_ter
eating, fullness, inordinate craving
for food, or entire lack of appetite.
Whatever it means, there's trouble,
and it's with the stomach. If you
have stomach trouble, you will bo
interested in this letter from a
man who had it and was cured by
"For nine yea/s I Buffered from stomach
trouble. I tried the aid of the best doctors
of Philadelphia and Pittsburg, and spent
large sums of money, all in vain. One iLy
while waiting a train in Bellaire, 0., I
picked up a paper with a notice of Ayer'i
SarsaparilU. I got one bottle to try it. It
did mo so much good that I purchased fivo
more bottles. I took four of them anl
gained in flesh, my appetite improved, and
now I can eat anything. My stomach is all
right, thinks to the use of Aver's Sarsapa
rilla." — CALVIN M. STEVENS, Uniuntown, Pa.
Sot Because They Might. Hut to Sllenee
Their (Junclclng.
A baggageman on the Santa Fe, who
runs into Kansas City from out in the
western part of Kansas, has lost lots
of sleep. It is doubtful if he can ever
catch up with it. He leaves Hutch
inson at night and reaches Kansas
City In the morning. Nearly every
night he brings in his car two or three
coops of live domestic ducks. During
the night, when he has no baggage to
deliver at small stations, It has been
his habit and privilege to lie down
an an improvised couch and doze.
With the advent of the ducks the doz
ing stopped. The almost constant
quacking of the ducks, who could not
understand their strange environment,
would not permit of sleep.
For many nights, as he lay awake,
he planned relief. He thought of
strangling the ducks or chloroforming
them. But neither expedient seemed
good. One night a bright idea came
to him. After he had put it into exe
cution the ducks were silent.
The next night he had two coops
of unusually vociferous ducks. As
soon as it came time for sleep ha
wrenched a slat from one of the coops,
reached in, and pulled out a duck.
From his pocket he tonk a small rub
ber band, which he slipped over the
duck's bill just back of the nostrils.
The duck tried to quack, but the rub
ber band, while it stretched a little,
would not permit the duck to open its
bill far enouuh to '.ise its tongue. Only
a murmur came frc ni it. Ona by oue
the ducks were muzzled, and the bag
gageman rested comfortably.
'1 he commission were surprised
next morning when they received a lot
of ducks with rubber bands around
their bills, and when the bands were
removed the shi;' : of protest from
the ducks were (1 .
Something to know!
Our very large line of Latest patterns of Wall Paper
with ceilings and border to match, AN full measure
ments and all white backs.|i|Elegant designs as lo,w
as jc per roll.
Window Shades
with roller fixtures, fringed and plain. Some as low
as ioc; better, 25c, 50c,
Elegant Carpets
rainging in prices 20c., 25c., j;c„ 4;c„ and 68c.
Antique Bedroom Suits
Full suits SIB.OO. Woven wire springs, $1.75.
Soft top mattresses, good
Feather pillows, $1.75 per pair, v s
N 1 .
GOOD CANE SEAT CHAIRS for parlor use set. Cockers to
match, 1.25. Large size No. 8 cook stove, $20.00; red cross
ranges s2l. Tin wash boilers with covers, 49c. v Tin pails-r-
I4qt, 14c; lOqt, 10c; Bqt, 8c; 2qt covered. sc.
Jeremiah Kelly,
Formerly Owned by O. W. Mathers
at this place
1 am Now Prepared
To Do All Kinds of Milling on Very Short
Notice With W. E. Starr as Miller.
Please Give a Trial.
N. B. All parties knowing themselves indebted to me will
confer a great favor by calling and paying the amount
due, as I need money badly at once.
Respectfully yours, W. E. MILL R.
grand spring
Shoe Stock
Comprising Correct, Stylish, Comfortable Shoes for every mem
ber of the family.
We are now ready to show you as fine a line of footwear as was
ever shown in town before.
We are constantly adding to our stock a higher "and better grade
of shoes and at prices decidedly less than others.
That the public appreciates our efforts in this direction is attest
ed by our daily increasing sales of high-class footwear.
You are cordially invited to call and examine our stock and we
are positive that the styles and quality, combined with our usual
low prices, will please you.
Elegant Spring
Shoes for Ladies
Our showing of Ladies' Shoes for spring wear will be more fully
appreciated by those who desire Stylish, Comfortable Shoes, with
out paying extravagant prices for them, and we trust to increase
business to make up for reduced profits.
A stylish, up to date, tan, cloth top, lace shoe, sold everywhere
for 81.75, our price 81.25. The same redaced prices prevail on
our 81 75 2.00, 2.50 and 3.00 lines. We guarantee a saving of
from 25 to 75 cents on each pair of shoeß.
Our line of Clothing, Gents' Furnishing Goods, Ladies' Capes,
Skirts, Corsets and Shirtwaists is compile. Come and see for
yourself. \
Jl~ The Reliable Dealer in Clothing
aeon rCr Boots and Shoes.