SULLIVAN REPUBLICAN. W. M. CHENEY, Publisher. VOL. XIII. Of the whito population of America only eight per cent, are nnablo to read or write. Tho legislative assembly of Victoria, Australasia, has possed a bill imposing n tax on tho unimproved value of land. There are in tho United States at present 6,000,000 farms. About one half the population of tho Bcpublic or over 30,000,000 peoplo livo on them, and these dwellers furnish more than Beventy-four per cent, of tho total value of the exports of the country. Italy proposes to encourage the na tives of Abyssinia to emigrate into tho valleys of the Nile and open up tho Soudan to civilization. Tho Italian colonists on tho high lands, now that the possession of Kassala has opened now horizons, would protect and en courage the native emigration. The new State officials of South Carolina aro unusually young in years, even for tho South, says the Now York Advertiser. Tho Governor is thirty one, the Adjutant-General twenty-live and the Attorney-General only twenty four. Governor Evans is the young est man ever elected to the Governor ship. The figures of tho New York Build ing Department show that in the last fourteen years §325,000,000 havo been spent in building flats and tenements in New York, and the St. Louis Star- Sayings estimates that at least $50,- 000,000 of this amount has been wasted in needless brickwork, which only obstructs light. In the course of a recent speech Ad miral Field, a Tory member of tho British Houso of Commons said: "There is no such thing AS equality in this world and there will not bo in heaven." The Liberals among his constituents have challenged tho Ad miral to produce his Biblical authori ty for the latter clause of this asser tion. It has been ruled by Judge Drew, of Boston, in tho caso of a man churged with highway robbery that ho was not guilty because after first demanding money from a woman with a threat of death if sho refused ho made a polite request for it after the purse was produced. It is hold that this was a voluntary act on the part of the victim. Tho Japanese alphabet of forty eight letters is written in four dif ferent characters, one of which is re garded as especially appropriate for men and another for women. Works of scienco and higher literature of an official nature aro written in tho Chinese characters. At present, adds the New Orleans Picayune, Japan is writing tho history of tho Japan* Chinese war in characters of blood. According to tho New York Sun, American cheeses used to be sent abroad by tho thotuaml pounds twenty years ago and returned by the same steamship line properly labelled as English. It is perfectly well knowu that most of tho popular for eign cheeses aro more or less success fully counterfeited in this country, and it would bo interesting to know what proportion of the largo ex portation of American cheeses return as foreign. The fatteuiug of livo stock on cot touseed hulls aud meal is becoming quite an important feature in South «ru business affairs, announces the Manufacturers' ltecord. It promises to add materially to the prosperity of the South, and to enable that sectlou uot only to suppiv its owu wants for good beef, but to rhip fattened beeves North lu competition with the Wist. The cattle can be fattened on cottou seed meal aud hulls at a total cost of about ten cents a day, while it is esti mated to cost at least twenty ceuts a day iu the West and Northwest, where hay, corn and other food»tuffs are used. H is said that the Chinese are the greatest gambler* 111 the World, (laiues of chance are the very breadth of their uostrils, aud they eauiiot live without them. It I* the one pastime in a life of unceasing toil, but the evil doe* uot assume serious |»hntw» -• iou# ■> foreigners do not Ute Idle Willi lliolr Hstu«.». A Chinaman iu«y m raru in ktaueta lose hi*all when amoug Lu country mm, but ll h» docs he gu«S contentedly l»S4»k to tt «rk Mil day and i* not, liku uiu»t ruined gnu ld»r», tncaoacitxt d lor boats! (oil. II I* when the rilfr.i't of .. i i ul ,„ st>kallowi>l '•» 'eke a !<>u l »u l to utlil/lr ritlio -e « "'< »" »» • t>4U* ■ fur the gratification «112 th*ir <•** put thai w de*. r- a l muebiof »* » tou* 111 WHEN THfc SKIES CLEAR OFF. The prospects will bo brighter, Tho burdens will bo lighter, An" t»o souls of us be whiter When tiie skies eloar oIT. With sweeter roses sprlnsrin*, An' sweeter birds u'slnjjln', An' all tho bells a-rlngin' When the sklosclear ofll Tho sliver—it'll jingle, Till your fingers tingle, tlngio ; Olil frionils'll meet and mingle When the sklos clear off. An' trouble, liko a feather. Will gosillin' out the weather i We'll sing nn' daneo togotner When the skies clear ofT! There's a sign o' light a-comin'; Aa' you h< ar tho wagon hummiu'; You'll bo mnrehln' to the drumaiin' When the skies clear oIT. No mailer what's tho troublo— It'll break jest liko a bubble, An' you'll drive In harness doublo When tho skies clear off! —Atlanta Constitution. A MYSTERIOUS CLERK, Nadvertisoment of the following tenor appeared in one of the daily jonr nals of a prosperous nm * ra P idl y growing »\ American city some l\ years sinco : ACCOUNTANT—The /ra/IH\ services of nn accom- Sjh : .y * si]) pllshed and competent ljsl person are desired by (k| the advertiser to take Yii chnrge of the books and wav correspondence of a flourishing business. Liberal salary nnd permanent position is offered to one with proper credentials. Ad dress. A hundred candidates for this place presented thomselvcs at tho establish ment of Mr. Corlis, and among the competitors thero camo a modestly attired person, who more than tho others seemed, at first eight, accepta ble to the proprietor. The address of this applicant was quiet and pleasant. His whole ap pearance that of an earnest, well-dis posed man, who was desirous to get along in tho world. lie brought with him and presented to Mr. Corlis a few brief letters of recommendation from persons resid ing eastward, aud exhibited a draft for a limited sum upon a responsible banking house in the town. His story was situplo and Btraightforward, nnd his manners were altogether prepos sessing. He wrote a fair business hand, his credentials proved oatisfac tory to the not over-cautious Mr. Cor lis, and he was engaged. Ernest Maywood—for thus the ap plicant signed his name—proved a model clerk. He tnust have been somo thirty years of ago when ho entered tho employ of Mr. Corlis. Ho might have been five years younger, por liops. Ho reaped tho experience of forty, at least, for he was cunning in accounts, and his knowoledge of the ramifications of debt and credit was extraordinary. His varied qualifications were quickly brought into requisition, and his em ployer very soon camo to esteem him for his accuracy iu mercantile mat ters, as well as for tho cvery-day good ness of character that marked his con tinually upright aud honest courso of conduct. Mr. Corlis had a daughter, his only child, in whom were centered all his hopes. The father thought he saw in the character of his new clerk busi ness qualities most desirable, and he believed him to be a man of integrity aud worth ; and at tho end of a twelve month he secretly determined upon bringing about an intimacy betweeu Ernest and his daughter, with a view to making him bis partner in trade at the fitting moment, und subsequently, if possible, to nuiting his daughter with him in marriage. Maywood had once or twice been the guest of his employer at dinner, where he had been introduced to the fair and agreeable Miss Ccrlis, and an eveniug or two had been passed by him at hor father's house ; but nothing occurred to offer tho pareut auy hope that his employe had beeu affected iu any wisu by his daughter's charms. Thus the months passed quietly by, Maywood contiuued ou in the same ploddiug, indefatigable, untiring rouud of duty, always at his poet, ever devo ted to his master's interests, and more thau satisfying the expectations of the thriving Mr. Corlis, who waa fortunate iudeed iu the selection be bad made iu his now confidential clerk. "Ernest," said his employer to him one uioruiug, "I voluntarily increased your salary, a twelvemonth since, be cause you merited it, though yuu did not lueutiou the subjeet yourself. Two year* ago to-day, yuu comuienceibser vice with ine. The bal«ao* sheet ex hibits a haudaome profit upon the last year's buaineaa, to which result yuu have largely contributed, directly aud ludireetly. I now propose to offur you an iuterest iu the buainess, and front this date, if you agree to it, yuu shall become a partner." The offer was a liberal one. The iu ootne derivable from such a share of the proliu would have quintupled May wood's earnings. tin the part of his employer, il was the opening wadge fur his future plan »l marry in# iita daughter well, and to hie nind. Hie ■lncision —a decimation iuatautly, but Iraukly and kindly given, as toil tided the generous Mr, t 'or lis. Maywood said lie was eonteut as he waa I Ilia salary was ample, and wa« a full equivalent for hie bumble ser- V lev*. Ha dill Uot deatre It I Iter eased, lie had no use for niuney than bis pi see now y tabled biut lie had no wish to lueur additional reewuuslbtli. liee. He waa happy, and if Mr Uorlia waa satisfied, so waa be. And thero the Matter dropped. Mayauwd euntinited in Ibe perform aaee ul bia duties, and Mr. Curtis LAPORTE, PA., FRIDAY, MARCH 8, 1895. quietly awaited another opportunity to carry out his long-cherished plan in reference to his daughter's prospects; while Miss Oorlis lost no fitting occa sion to second her parent's views and wishes. "Time flies with Bilent wings." A twelve-month passes swiftly. Another year elapsed without making any pe culiar change in the relations of the parties about whom we have written. The city where our narration dates was located upon tho river, and upon its front street were situated the stores occupied by Mr. Corlis. Nearly three years had passed sinco Maywood had been installed thoro, when a steamer came down, on its way to New Orleans. A rival boat was in sight, closo be hind, and it wns the custom for these craft to halt en routo at tho landing in front of Mr. Corlis's warehouses, to take or leavo passeugers. As the fore most boat rounded up at tho levee, her engineer neglected to "blow off" her surplusage of steom, desiring to retain it for a dash with his competi tor when he loft this halting-placo. The result of this neglect was tho ex plosion of one of tho largo cylinders, by which accident a dozen persons on the deck were fearfully scalded. The sound of tho crash immediate ly drew a crowd upon tho levoe, and shortly afterwards the shrieking suf ferers were brought on shore. Mr. Corlis and Maywood were among tho first who reachod the river's edge. Body after body—maimedand scathed the river's edge. Body after body— maimed and scathed and blackened— was borne from the boat, and May wood and his employer were actively busy in their olliccs of kindness to tho unfortunate, when tho figuro of a plainly dressed man was brought out, writhing in his lost agonies, and fear fully mutilated. Mr. Corlis approached him as ho camo forward in tho hands of the tho crew who wero removing him, and Maywood followed closely upon the steps of his employer. Tho fatally injured and dying man opened his eyes as tho clerk camo up, gazed fearfully at him, and shrieking tho broken syllable, "May—l" expired! Maywood started back, horror struck 1 For an instant ho wa9 para lyzed ! That faco and voice—that last glance! The clerk was bewild ered, and motionless as a ttatue —and tho body was taken to the leveo. Maywood in the confusion fled. Subsequent search for him proved futile. He]disappeared instanter, and all efforts to find him, or to loaru of his whereabouts or his fato, wero alike in vain. After weeks of una vailing inquiry, tho belief of his em ployer settled into no very satisfac tory channel (though ho feared that Maywood had either fallen from the boat, amid the terrible confusion, or that ho must havo committed suicido,) and his placo was filleq in the count ing-hoftse, whilo tho business of tho establishment went on as before. What disposal tho bookkeeper had mado of his surplus earnings, from time to time, if he had any, or wheth er ho had saved uny portion of his pay, was unknown to his lato em ployer. Inquiries were instituted, and all the means at hand likely to afford auy light upon the singular and sudden disappearance were availed of —but to no purpose. Maywood was gonu! Six years, with their round of joys and sorrows, pains and pleasures, changes and fortunes, had passed awny, after tho accident relatod, when one ovening there halted boforo tho door of Mr. Corlis a carriage, from which alighted a lady and gentleman, who inquired if tho merchant wero at home. They were shown into tho drawing-room, and the cards of "Mr. and Mrs. Ervino" were sent up. Tho name was .not familiar, either to Mr. Corlis or his daughter. "Ervino?" said tho father, "Er vino? I do not recoguizo tho name, daughter." Mr. Corlis soon after entered tho apartment, followed by his daughter, aud the strangers rose to pay thoir re spects. "Mr. Ervine," eaid tho merchant, "I am happy to meet you. But, really, I do not recollect— "No," said tho stranger, "I never had the pleasure of meeting you be fore. This in my wife, however," he added, presenting the modestly-at tired lady who accompanied him. "She says you will probably recollect htr." The lady advanced, offered her hand to Mr. Corlis and his daughter, and said: "Surely, Mr. Corlis, you havo not forgotten me?" "Maywood !" exclaimed father and daughter together. "You are right," said the lady, calmly. "Hut how is this?" asked tho mer chant. "When did this chauge oc cur? A woman!" "Sit dowu, my dear sir," said the lady, ealutly, "ami t will at ouoo un ravel what must have seemed a most mysterious proceeding, in your esti mation: but which, auder the circum stance*, could uot bu otherwise. "Nearly twenty years ago I married a uiau of whom 1 knew tuo little, aud who proved bim»elf utterly unworthy of the eoulbleuce and love of her whom he glostljf deceived. Wfor« aud after oar ttuioti. Hit habits were dissolute i he auou became a continued inebriate j our prospectively happy home shortly Itecaine aseeue ul Continuously riotous dissipation i hi* little pro|*»rty, with my owu. was squandered, aud, before live years had passeil, wu were home less, penniless, frieudle**. "VI licit I could no louder bear up uitdur the cruel treatment to which I was subjected, I luade a tins! appeal to liliu lu hi* drunken wrath he forced tue violently away trout him, aud in despair I iUd froiu tho sseue of my early miseries. I adopted my maiden name ul Ma) wood, procured the blln* ol etedettev wnitU you have •awn, aud having ae<|«4ii«4 A kiwei edge of books and accounts in earlier years assumed the habiliments of the ruder sex, believing that I could thus better earn a sustenanoe. "I came here, entered youT service, saved a few hundred dollars—and you remember the terrible ooourrenoe whioh immediately preoeded my dis appearance?" "The accident on the steamer?" "Yes. We wore hurrying about among the wounded, as you recolleot, when the figure of one of the dying sufferers approached us." "Yes, yes, I remember." "That man was my husband." There were tears in the eyes of the little coterie who listened to thiß sin gular tale of woe. "I recognized him, and he half pro nounced the name of Ma-rv, my bap tismal name, as I hurried about amid the frantic crowd ou that fearful oc casion. Stunned with the recognition under such circumstanoes, bewildered by the trying position in which I thus suddenly found myself placed, and fearful of the results of exposure, I knew not what to do, or scarcely what I did. "Ho did not survive the acoident, however; and, two hours afterwards, in homely female attire, I claimed his unfortunate remains. None recog nized me in my plain apparel, and surely none could suspect that the veiled and humble woman who fol lowed the corpse to its last roeting place was in fact the bookkeeper of the well-known Mr. Corlis. "I left town forthwith. Through your kindness and liberality I had been able to lay by a considerable sum of money, and I departed for the West, and, once more among total strangers, I continued the resumption of the habiliments and habits of my sex. With tho means at my com mand, I continued to live quiotly and respectably, until somo two years ago I met this gentleman, who offered me his hand. lam now Mrs. Ervine, and this is my husband, sir." As may well be imagined, a liappy reunion succeeded this denouement of tho long-timo mystery which had shrouded the sudden disappearance of Mr. Corlis's bookkeeper. And tho reader may bo assured that Mr. and Mrs. Ervino were not only very wel come in the rich merchant's family, but that tho newly wodded pair be came tho futuro fast friends of "May wood's" former employer and his ex tended social circlo.—New York News. A Bog's Intelligence. G. Kugg Thompson, tho eix-yoar old son of Dr. Thompson, of Glons Falls, is tho owner»>f a large St. Ber nard named Nero. The animal has a li«ht-browu coat and weighs about 150 pounds. Nero is an unusually intelligent dog. He has a great hoad for mathematics and cau add, sub tract, divide and multiply with sur prising celerity. Let u certaiu num ber of persons onter a room. Then let half the number depart, nnd Nero will notify his master by barkiughow many thero are loft in tho room. Should others onter tho room aftor Nero has notified his master of tho number present, ho will quickly nnd accurately indicate tho new number. Some of tho problems worked out by this canine wonder would prove difli cult for a teu-ycar-old boy to demon strate. An interesting example of Nero's ability as a mathematician is showu wheu a series of figures run ning from one to nine is placed on a blackboard. As each figure is set down, either iu rotation or at ran dom, tho dog will signify by a bark the number. On one occasion Nero entered a ho tel with tho doctor. A number of guests were standing, sitting, or tnov iug about a room. When asked how many persons wero present, Nero de liberately walked about until ho found four men behind a counter. Then he sagely trotted back to his master and annouueed tho correct number, fif teen. Ho informed his master how many of tho number wero sitting aud how many standing.—Troy Times. The First I'atlffit, A few days ago tho little son of a well-known physician was entertaiu iug a playmate at his father's house. As ehildren will, tliey ransacked every nook and corner of tho building. Their curiosity led them t3 explore the recesses of a closet iu wltiuh tho doctor koeps his iustrumouts aud other personal effects, among which is a complete skeleton. The strange boy was frighteued wheu he tiri-t beheld tho griuuiug remnant of what once had beeu a human being and started to run away. The doctor's sou, how ever, had seen the skeleton so often that ho entertained for it only that feeliug of coutempt begotten by familiarity, aud iu a little while sue- Cccded iu so allaying the tears of his eoiupauiuu that the yutiugster began to haudie the tbiu« and rattle its dry buues. "Where did your lather net it? ' he ttually waked. "I don't know," was the reply ; "but 1 guess it was his first (latleut, for he's had it au awful loug tiiue."—liiitte Miner. Mlxel I'l* Ihe (tables Oiibertien humor has been exem plified by WU incident at HoUttiport, England. Last week bu ths took plaoi **iark" wi.s explained aud the busl* tiese uf rest -nuti the lalaiits to their respective mothers bogeu. li re a •t rloua dlfHeulty presented Itself, fur ibe atteudauts were unable to say which was which Th« 'l-ieuliliceli YEARS or BANK CLEARINGS. Amount Ot Year. clearings. IR9I $44,995,611,293 1893 58,616,833,135 1892 61,595,498,420 1891 56.312,344,509 1890 59,585,636,458 1889 55,700,192,284 1838 49,192,055.291 1837 51,144,077,112 18S6 48.800,868,750 1835 41.255,629,074 During 1891 only 13 out of 69 cities showed increased clearings as com pared with 1893. The decrease at New York wos 22 per cent., at Philadelphia 10 per cent., at Boston 9 per cent., Chicago only 8 per cent., NewOrloaus 13.4 per cent., Nashville 21.8 per cent., and at Atlanta 6.8 per cent. Of course the largest volume of bank clearings in tho United States was during 1892, at the timo of onr great est prosperity under protection. In tho following year, however, as soon as we were threatened with free traile, the bank clearings decreased by eight billions of dollar:', and in the follow ing year, 1894, there was a further decrease of eight and a half billions of dollars, making tho total loss in tho volume of trade transacted throughout the country amount to $10,500,000,000 less during 1891 than during 1892. According to sections ot tho country the bank clearings during each of tho past two jears have been as follows: Section. 1894. 1893. Now Eng1and...54,803.742,577 *5.322,271,620 Middle 28,4:13,856,890 35,6.89,956,218 Western 1,904,892,118 1,977,891,674 Northwestern.. 5,472,158,409 6,040.894.513 Southwestern.. 1.820,969,070 1,829.292,095 Southern 1,((05,118,489 1,704.073,333 Far Western... 955.373,680 1,080,130,727 Total U.S 44,995,011,293 53,510,883,135 Dropped Out o! the Boat. Bo Honost About It. Tho Savannah, Oa., News rejoioes that on December 81, 1894, tho last remaining rato of duty provided by tho McKinley law gavo place to tho Wilson tariff iu tho wool schedule, taying: "The rate on woolen goods is con siderably reduced by the new bill, and the effect will be gratefully felt by consumers when they goto buy. Under the Democratic bill manufac turers aro given free wool, hence thoy will bo able to nvike better aud cheaper woolen goods tiian beforo, and thus be better able to compete with im portations. There will bo bharp competition, of course, ull of which will ho of benefit to the great majority who buy. Cheapened coats and cheap ened blankets was Democracy's New Year's gifts to tho people." The Savannah News is quite right wheu it says that tho rate in the woolen schedule is considerable re diiood, aud also thut there will be sharp competition with woolen im portations ; and really its dream of ciie.ip things may be realized meas urably, aud these cheap things will, unquestionably, be free trade's gift to the people, llut the News vhotild be honest euough to itate that the thiugs given by the Democracy are stolen goods, tllched by a pertldiou* aud dis honest party from a large class of our people, who even now are suffering most serijusly because of the theft. The («ri|t 1* Here. tills A UrMUU lor 11, There ate million* of poor imam ( loved WufklU-iMt'll Milt IT luu iu this Miiuirv today from odd, who are it a tide to Iniv the eh ■»(> uooleit* of the tin *p Id mxU I t» u. . r Yuuir lom .if worlk IS Ibe remit of the theft ul UlfcVvl-Mid. liwltuau WU*v4t> Terms---SI.OO in Advance i 51.25 after Three Months. Less Roads Under Free Trade. The Railroad Gazette gives the fol< lowing account of the extensions oi oar railroad system in 1894: Railroad building in this country would certainly appear to have reached its lowest ebb, when the total new mileage built in one Tyear amounts to only 1761 miles. That is all the new railroad that has been built in the United States in 1894. That figure is lower than any that has been reached since 1875, when the net increase for the year was 1700 miles, the amount built being somewhat greater. The new mileage reported for 1894 is ap parently the smallest aotual amount of new railroad built in any year sinoe the Civil War, and it is muoh the smallest percentage of increase. Tak ing Poor's figures of the amount of railroad built at the end of 1893 (177,- 753 miles), the railroad oonstrnoted in 1694 has added less than one per cent, to that total. Father ol Protection Talks. The tariff was claimed by those in power to have been excessive on for eign trado and productive of too muoh revenue, but the protracted agony and Caesarian delivery of the tariff reform bantling, and thl pro gressive Treasury deficiency thus pro voked, far transcends the sentimental agony of a surplus, whioh long ago ceased to vex any financiers. It is al ways something too much, whether of a surplus or of a deficiency. Two years ago some thought we had too muoh of MoKinleyism. More now think we have got too much of Wil sonism. The tariff pendulum swings to and fro between protection and freo trade,tiring out even tho President in dreaming dreams, alas! of "iron and coal." —From Speech of Senato' Justin S. Morrill, of Vermont. Nothing But Ruin. With cotton at five cents and the price drooping, Southern planters are in a state of bewilderment and con sternation. Bankruptcy and impov erishment stare them in tho face if the present rate, which they assert is be low the cost of production, be main tained. In liko manner the wheat produoer sees ruin confronting him in the continuance of low prices for grain. Tho Southern planter and the Western farmer, tho two agents who wero largely instrumental in ordering in 1892 a roversal in industrial and protective policies of tho Nation, are now suffering directly from the evils of underconsumption. Manufactur ing interests were the to feel tho effects of busiu-cr. uncertainty and the losses of wago earners. The great ag ricultural producer?, South and West, are now learning to their cost that tho marked deelino in the pur chasing power of a prosperous Nation roacts necessarily upon cotton plant ers and wheat farmers. If cheapness of food nnd clothing wero the main factor of National pros perity, Americans would now have full cause for gratitudo to Democratic tariff meddlers. But when flour is low. and cotton sells below tho cost of production, and every other commod ity is cheap because tho supply runs far beyand the demand, they need not bo thankful. Tho practical experi ence of tho last two years lias taught Americans that, whatever may bo the truth about free trado or tho protec tive policy, nothing can take tho place of National prosperity under which all classes of the population are em ployed at good wages uud ali indus tries aro in full, unimpeded operation. Those are tho conditions whioh devel op the purchasing power of every con sumer an2,072,861' more thau the entire assessed value of all the property of tbe city ol New York in 1894. The number of factories in New York State increased 23,101 during the do oade from 18*0 to 1890; there WHS an increase of $015,914,019 iu the capital invested ; of 318,551 iu tbe bauds eiu ■ployed; of $208,212,013 iu wages paid of $191,051,540 iu the material used, aud of $030,881,075 iu tbe value o manufactured products. Tbe growth of the manufacturing industries of New York duriug tbe last oensus decade surpasses auytliing that has ever occurred iu the history ol anpr country of like population And this euoruioue gruwth lias taken plaoe under a protective tariff. Tbe products of ibe factories of New York Htate aloue amouut to $104,< 903,973 tuurc thau the uutire exports and important tbe whole United Htate*. The amouut paid fur raw material ic these factories, annually, is s2lo,OtfM, 934 more than our foreign imports, iu iliOO tbe amount paid iu wages to em pioyes iu theso factories was ouly 112 IM, 148,5119 lb »u tbe tuts amouut uf our foreign imports, ll would be le*» lew to the people uf this coiitttiy to elo > our porta entirely to foreign cum mote tdau to ruia tbe wauufaeturin .4 m lustriee uf tbis Htate. NO. 22. TIS EUT A LITTLE THING. 'Tls bnt a Httle thing to smile Approvingly once Inn while; To speak a word ot praise, of cheer, When things seem rather chill and drear To sometimes fondly hold and press. Borne hand caress. 'Tls but a little thing togo And strive to sootho another's woe, To gently stoop and whisper low. you understand, you feel and know- That you will help him all you can To be a man. Tls but a little thing to bear ! The daily trivial wear and care Without eomplatn or needles 3 fret-*" 'Tls but a little thing, doar—yet 'Tis Just suoh simple loving deed® The Father heels. —Kathleen Kavunagh, in Picayuno HUMOIt OF THE DAT. Half a loaf is better than no vaca tion.—Life. It is all up with tlie centipede when he is knocked off his feet. Family ties—The ono your brother is always borrowing from yon. —Puck. There are conspicuous exceptions to the rule that short accounts make long friends.—Pack. It can not bo said of the profession al bankrupt that "his failings lean to virtue's side," —Fuck. The longest pole won't knock the persimmons unless the right kind of a man has hold of it.—Statesman. After a bank cashier has feathered his nest ho fancies that he has plumed himself for ilight.—Galveston News. Suffragist—"l tell you the women are advanoing right along." Gay boy —"Yes, the married ones; single ones never get beyond a certain stage."— Boston Courier. Mr. Cawker (after his wifo has read several pages) "ls there any news in your mother's lotter, dear?" Mrs. Cawker —"I haven't come so the post script yet."—Truth. Bobby—"You ought to r soe my big sister. Everybody says she's a beau tv." Johnny—"l bet she can't hold a candle to my sister fer looks. Why my sister sold twenty-two tioketa for a charity concert."—Good News. "What are you writing, Hawley?" "A story. I'm going in for iiction." "Really? For a magazine?" "No. For my tailor. He wants his money, and I'm telling him I'll send him a check next week." —Harper's Bazar. The one unnoticed point which tho present flood of illustrated Napoleonic literature has made moro prominent than any other is that throughout tho great Corsican's whole early life ho needed a hair-cut. —Buffalo Express. Mrs. Houser—"Have you any idea what 'speaking terms' means, Mr. Houser?" Mr. Houser—"Certainly, madam. Anywhere from S3O to 8100 per night, according to tho promi nence of the lecturer." —Buffalo Cour ier. "I see," observed Mr. Chugwater, looking over his morniug paper, "they're making another effort to put a tax on bachelors." "Is that tho single tax I've heard so much about?" inquired Mrs. Chugwater.—Chicago Tribune. She was a new telephone girl— "Whut number, please?" "Ono hun dred and fifteen." "I didn't cateli that." "One hundred—" "Yes?" "And fifteen." "All right. Here is 100. Fifteen is busy just nov* J ' — Harper's Bazar. Contributor—"Pretty poem, isn't it?" Magazine Editor —"Yes, very; but wo can't publish it." Contribu tor—"Why not?" Magazine Editor —"Why, anybody can tell at tho first reading preoisely what it means." Somcrville Journal. "I don't believo you can road minds, doncher know," said a chappie to ft professional mind-reader. "Oh, yes, I ean," replied the latter, pleasantly. "Bring around somebody with a mind and I'll soon prove that 1 can."— Pittsburg - Chrouiole-Telegraph. John's Wifo—"John, I wish you'd saw up some wood for tho house." .Tuhu—"l wish you wouldn't n*k iuo to do suoh work, Maria. Sawing wood's a thing that even the poorest tramp refusos to stoop to, aud yon kuow me."—South Boston News. A little three-year-old girl went to a children's party. On her return she said to her parents: "At tho party a little girl fell off a chair. AH tho other girls laughed, but 1 didn't." "Well, why didu't you laugh?" " 'Cause I was tho one that fell off. ' —Tid-BiU. _ Ileal Cooker) Teaehiuf. Butter aud new-laid eggs tlguro largely iu cooking schools, and a* tho teacher lias not to imy for them, aho wntea eloquent aud insists upon such a lavish use of both that were her les sons generally acted upon there wunl.l soou bo a mighty tamuie in tho laud. But the poor don't come; tho rich ean do without suoh teaehiugs, for others do their work ; aud only a few ladles iu the middle classes with very inquiring utiuds put iuau appearauoe. "Lot th«> teacher," »aid a poor wo uiau, "colile to my house aud show me how to cook there, *ud then I shall bo oblige Ito her." Here is tho tc>t oI (food, cheap cooking--to cook with lltllu tuouey ; a siuall, soioklug tire ; a miserable oven 1 a couple of sauce pans, aud uo settles, aud soluelluiss more nioiitht to fee I thtu food to put iuto them. All the Y»ar Itoiiud. All ll'dllilthup'* IMltfetiee. The \r*hhiiUop of York has cou». ph ted his self-imposed task of visitiuif the aiiulu of the d'M parishes m hi* diocese, I'tiu work has occupied tin o« m years. Mauy of Ilia I>SI ishes had uot previously Iswk visile I by a prelate of th» Church wtthtu living memory, Loudutt iviwntat/k.