SULLIVAN JBS& REPUBLICAN. W. M. CHENEY, Publisher. VOL. XI. Mulhall estimates that the civilized Nations pay annually 813,700,000,000 for food. The Slaughter family, of Texas, are raid to be the mjst extensive land owners in America, their combined ownings amounting to 500,000 acres. Fatness in women is regarded as a mark of beauty in the Orient. Since their advent in the World's Fair grounds us sedan-cliair carriers, the Turks have had a good deal to do with fat women, and tho Argonant avers that they have revised their esthetics. Joint-stock farming, by which larger agricultural operations can be carried on under one management than is pos sible for the single-handed farmer, will probably lie one of the future de velopments of our agricultural system. This is a practical way of reducing the cost of production. An aerial electric railway, invented by Albert Leslie Widdis, of Detroit, is expected to perform wonders. The own er claims that it will send cars whizzing through space at the rate of 500 miles an hour ! Think of it, exclaims the New York Ledger, a letter mailed in Chi cago will reach New York in two hourß! Observes the Detroit Freo Press: "There is a certain amount of scientific interest in knowing that it is not the high temperature that makes the peo ple uncomfortable, but the humidity with which the air is charged. But un fortunately the scientific fact does not lessen the suffering. One is just as hot after finding it out as when he was in total ignorance on the point." France is soon to adopt an interest ing innovation in the postal-card sys tem, announces the Argonaut. The cards will be issued in the form of check-books, with stubs. The sender of tho postal card can make memo randa of its contents on the stub, and can have this stamped at the postofficc before the card is detached, so that a verified record of the correspondence can be kept. At the moment when horses taken a back seat in this country cam els have come to the foro in Australia. It is said that five lines of traffic have been already opened up and are in regular operation there. Two thou sand camels are in use daily. It is not necessary to carry any food for thest animals, as they ore able to subsist on the coarse grass and shrubs where horses or bullocks would starve. Statistics concerning the failures of farmers in the first six months of 1893 throw bright lights on the present de pression of agriculture in England. From last January 1 to last July 1 the number of failures among farmers has been forty per cent, larger than in the corresponding months of last year. In England and Wales more than 16,000 persons engaged in agriculture are Ji ving in sheds, barns, tents, vans and in the open fields. Thousands of unem ployed agricultural laborers are hover ing on tho outskirts of London. In the same volume of statistics 52,484 persons are reported to be living now on coasting merchant vessels and in land barges. Evidence of the most direct variety places the blame for the destruction of the British bottle ship Victoria on the Admiral who went down with his ship, states the Washington Star. All the witnesses who testified before the court-martial at Valettu agree on that and every other material point and two of tho officers heard Sir George Tryon confess the responsibility. In all great catastrophies there is gener ally an effort made to place the burden on a corpse, and when Admiral Tryon was first declared guilty many people imagined that the accusation was due almost entirely to the fact that he was dead and could not, therefore, defend himself, but it is now certain that he blundered and did so with persistent e that brooked no interference. It is satisfactory to the Scientific American to learn that the gentlemen who have urged the Now York botani cal garden project are nearly now in a condition financially able to begin ac tual preliminary work near the Bronx Biver. At least the sum of #215,000 lias been received. There are several large subscriptions yet expected from wealthy citizens, an 1 when these are received it is proiable tho general public will be asked to contribute. There will be no pains or expense spared to make the garden forthy of the State and of the Nation. Kew Garden is tho model which the fat-seeing men who have undertaken th< charge of this en terprise have in vfcw, and there Is every reason to belfve that their of forts will be crowne) with success. The silver producing States number a population but little more than one per cent, the total of tbo United States. A new order of thing's has lately come about in Siam, and the young men are getting a great and unusuul share in the government of tho conn try. From the King downward there is scarcely a single minister who is above the age of forty, and many ure much younger. The pure Arab horse is now being largely used in England to invigorate the race horse, the hunter and tho carriage horse. He is also used for the production of the best class of polo ponies by being matched with small Exmoor and Welsh mares. In thoso districts where he is obtainable he is in great demand by the breeders. Not the least interesting portion of the newspapers of New York, to the San Francisco Argonaut, is that which describes the efforts of the benevolent to better the condition of the women and children of the poor. In New York, before there were any such ex cursions, the mortality among the children of the working-class was enormous. It has been greatly re duced since they came into vt^ue. Tho New York News thinks it is worthy of more than passing notice when the speed record of the bicycle reaches the astonishing pace of over 428 miles in twenty-four hours. This performance, achieved in London, sur passes the distance covered in the first six days go-as-you-please pedestrian race in New York City. The simple two-wheel contrivance has thus en abled man to travel as far in a day as his legs alone would take him in a week. When Buffalo Bill's Indians get through their work, in Chicago in the afternoon, they like nothing better than to repair to a merry-go-round near the camp and revolve to tho music of a bad hand-organ. The passer-by stops to see the show, for the bucks and squaws are in their full panopy of feathers and paint. Most people would get enough fun V>y riding Horse One k three or four hours every day without wanting to ride on wooden horses afterward; but, then, you see, real horses have no hand-organ attach ments. In other days the great area called Okefonokee Swamp in Southern Georgia was looked upon as utterly irreclaimable and worthless. It was lately sold by the State for sixteen cents per acre and an enterprising company of lumbermen has penetrated the supposed swamp and found it to be a small inland sea with rich islands. It is strange, muses the New York News, that this mystery was not developed long ago. Many a time the old wild cat banking system was satirized by bogus issues of the "Bank of Oke fonokee." Doctor Edward Everett Hale has not much patience with the idea that a clergyman must work six days over a sermon. He says: "A sermon con sists of about 2500 words. I take a cup of coffee before breakfast and write about six pages —that is, 650 words. In the morning I dictate to my amanuensis 1500 words. lam in tensely interested in the subject, and this takes only a quarter of on hour. In the afternoon I look it over and add 500 or 600 words, and the sermon is done. In all, I haven't put my hand for over two hours to paper." Says the Chicngo Herald: "Secre tary of State Walter Q. Gresham, will go down to history as the first member of the Cabinet who became acting President in consequence of the ina bility of both the President and Vice- President. On the same day in July President Cleveland and Vice-Presi dent Stevenson were both out of the country. Mr. Clovelond was on board the«yacht Oneida, sailing out to lind deep sea fishing off the coast of Massa chusetts. Mr. Stevenson was on the steamer Corona, taking a Pacific Ocean voyage from San Diego to San ta Barbara, Cal. Both were more than three marine leaguos, or say, ten and a half miles, from shore, which is the limit of the jurisdiction of the United States. It cannot be said they were the same as on United States soil, being on United States vessels and un der the United States Hag; for, if be ing on such a craft was the same as being on the land, they might have sailed around the world, claiming to be all the time in tho United States. Per haps Mr. Gresham did not assume the duties of acting President, but that lie was the legal acting President while Mr. Cleveland and Mr Stevenson !iot)< were ten mid a half miles from short; does not admit of u doubt." LAPORTE, PA., FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 1893. PATIENCE. Bo patient! Easy words to speak While plenty fills the cup of life, While health brings roses to tho cheek, And far removed are enre and strife. Falling so glibly from the tonguo Of those—l often think of this— Whom suffering has never wrung, Who scarcely know what patience is. ~ Be patient! when tho sufTrer lies Prostrate beneath some fell disease, And longs, through torturing agonies, Only for one short hour of oase. Be patient! when the weary brain Is racked with thought and anxious caro, And troubles in an endless train Seem almost more than it can bear. To feel the torture of delay The agony of hope deferred ; To labor still from day today, The prize unwon, the prayer unheard. And still to hope, and strive, and wait The due reward of fortune's kiss ; This is t., almost conquer fnte, This is to learn what patience is. Despair not ' though the clouds are dar'j, And storm and danger veil the sky ; bet fate and courage guide thy bark. The storm will pass, the port is nigh. Be patient! and thetido will turn, Shadows will fade before the sun , These are the hopes that live and burn To light us till our work is done. —All the Year Round. AUNT SUSAN'S QUILT. IHf F Jimmy and his iMi bride ain't H ' > ' t>aßeL ' with 1/ know what would 1/ m please 'em," said B with arms nkiin i I ,in d head ,;v , X 112/j ►!I twisted to one iMI side, as she stepped back and gazed witli admiration at the object spread out on tho bed. It was a care fully-pieced quilt, of a somewhat in tricate pattern. "Jimmy's bride can't help being tickled with that," said Mrs. Dake, as she smoothed out u fold; "and if she knows anything about nice quiting, she'll see that wn'u't quilted in a day. Well, I guess not! I quilted ev'ry last stitch of it myself, and there's a good half-day's work iu some of them blocks with the feather and herrin' bone pat terns and the shell border all 'round the aidge. I had that quilt in the frames five weeks and three days, and I put, all the time 1 could get on it, and there ain't no slack work, tired as I did get of seeing it 'round." She smoothed out another crease. "Leinmesee," she went on. "There's 2347 pieces in the quilt, and a good many of 'em ur<' pieces of' Jimmy's lit tle baby dresses. That'll please his wife, I jest know. Here's a block made of calico like a little pink dress he had when his ma first put him into short dresses. I remember it was made with a low neck and short sleeves, like they made baby dresses in them days, and his little shoulders and arms was almost as pink as the dress. "And here's pieces like a little double gown he had 'fore he went into short dresses. And this piece of blue cham bery is like a little sunbonnet he had, all lined with fine white jaconet. And here is a piece of line muslin with a little jjink sprig in it like the first short dress Jimmy ever had. He did look so eunnin'in it, with the sleeves looped back, and a tumble-curl on the top of his head! "I'll show his wife-to-be all these pieces, and if she ain't tickled with the quilt, she'll be a queer one." Then Mrs. Pake went over to an old-fashioned mahogany bureau with brass knobs, and took from tho upper drawer a large, square cream-tinted envelope, out of which she carefully drew the "invite" to Jimmy's wed ding. "Mr. and Mrs. William P. Holbrook invite you to be present at tho mar riage of their daughter Helen and Jamea Barclay Larkin, Wednesday evening, September 14." Then followed the address of the bride's parents, in a city 400 miles from Mrs. Dake's home. "But I'm goin'!" she said gleefully, as she slipped the invitation back into its envelope. "I'd go if it was twice as far. I ain't seen Jimmy for near on to five years, and he always seemed like my own boy to mo 'cause I never had none o' ray own, and I helped to bring him up after his own ma died, when he wa'n't but just in his first little trousies." "I aint been so far from home in muny a long year, and I reckoned my travelin' days was done, but I've got togo and see Jimmy married. I must see Elviry Hodge right away about turning and making over my black silk, and I must see Samantlia Bosc about a new cap. I guess I'll have to have something kind o' smart for a city weddin', where they'll all be fini fied up so. I don't want Jimmy to bo ashamed of his old aunty ; but lawsy me ! Jimmy wouldn't be ashamed of me if I went in my plain calico house dress. He wa'n't raised to set clothes abo\o his relations, and he ain't got nothing to be 'shamed of in any of his folks." Then Jimmy's aunt, her face aglow with loving thoughts of seeing Jimmy again, folded up tho quilt carofully in an old sheet, and laid it away in a lower drawtr-of tho buiyau, saying: "I s'poso they'll have lots of nice presents, but I'll warrant you they won't have one that represents as much lovin' labor a ; that quilt. I had to cry a little when I quilted them blocks with the pieces of his baby dresses in 'em. His wife ought to think the world and all of tile quilt. 1 hope to the land she won't goto using it com mon. " Mrs. Dake, who was a widow and childless, lived in u small, remote country town in which her nephew, James Larkin, had been born, and from which he had gone to become a successful young lawyer in the city. Ho had not been back to the home of his childhood for five years. As his Aunt Susan sad, ho "wa'u't n > hand to write letters," but ho often sent brief notes and little gifts to his aunt to assure her of his affection and gratitude. He had not announced his engage ment to her, and tho invitation to his wedding was ono of tho greatest sur prises of Mrs. Dake's uneventful life. "He jest wanted to give his- old aunty a big s'prise," she said to Elvira Hodge, the village seamstress, when she came to "fix over" Aunt Susan's black silk. "I couldn't believe my own eyes at first. It don't seem no longer than yesterday that Jimmy was runnin' 'round here in pinafores ; and to think of him bein' married—l de clare I can't git over it! "But I'll give him a s'prise, too. I don't intend to givo him a hint that I'm comin' to his weddin', and if he won't bo took back when he sees me marchin' in on him, my name ain't Susan Elizabeth Dake! Don't you reckon his wife'll bo tickled with that quilt, Elviry?" "They'd ought to be, that's sure," said Elvira. "I think it's a kind of special Provi dence that I putin the frames when I did. I didn't cal'late on quiltin' it until next' winter, but I had a kind of feelin' that I'd better do it when I did, and now it's turned out that there was a good reason why I should quilt it then." There was quite a company of Aunt Susan's friends at tho little station to see her off on-the morning she started. There was unusual color in her cheeks and unwonted sparklo in her eyes. She bade each of her friends good-bye two or threo times, and promised to take good care of herself. Some of them sho promised a crumb of Jimmy's wedding cake, and a full account of the wedding festivities. "An' if you could git me a scrap of tho bride's weddin' dress an' of any of her other dresses for my silk quilt, Susan, I'd be so pleased with 'em!" said old Mrs. Gray. "I will if I can, Nauey," said Aunt Susan. "There's the train comin'! I'm so glad I could get my trunk checked clean through ! I'd bein a nice fix if that trunk should get lost with Jimmy's quilt and my black silk in it! Where's my lunch basket? Oh, yoh're goin' to carry it away ou the train for me, are, vou, Hiram Drew? I'm 'bleegert to yofit but mind you git oil" the train 'fore it starts. Good-bye, Nauey ; good-bye all!" In a moment the train was on its way, Aunt Susan's handkerchief flut tered from one if car windows as long as the train was within sight of the lit tle station. All tho people in tho car noticed tho happy old lady in her queer, old fash ioned garb. Some had not seen for many years a shawl like the one she wore, with its fringe a foot long and silk embroidery in tho corners; but nothing was coarse or amiss in her dress, and there was a quaintness and charm about her that attracted the sympathy of all the passengers. She had not gone twenty-five miles before she was telling some of them nearest her all about Jimmy and Jim my's quilt, and the wedding to take place on the coming Wednesday. She was delighted to find that a mid dle aged, kindly looking woman who was one of the passengers lived in the city in which young Mr. Larkin lived, and could easily show her his board ing house. "I'm so much obleeged to you !"said Aunt Susan. "I've been dreadful nerv ous 'bout trying to find the house my self. I hated to write to him to meet me, 'cause it'd take off tho best part of the s'prise. I jest want to walk right in on him." That was just what she had the pleasure of doing the next afternoon. James Larkin was taking his wed ding suit from the box in which it had been sent home, when there came a knock at the door of his room. Aunt Susan was trembling with ex citement when her nephew opened the door. "Why, Aunt Susan!" he cried, and then he took her into his arms and kissed her on both cheeks. There was no lack of tenderness in her nephew's greeting, yet the eliajige in him was painful to her. He was a beardless, boyish-looking young man when she had seen liim last. Now he was a tall, broad-shouldered, full bearded man with a way that made it a little hard for her to call him "Jimmy." Ho did not say so, but she felt that he would rather have her call him "James;" and that Bounded so cold and formal to her. Ho now had tho graces of a city bred young man. She found it hard to accommodate herself to them, and to tho usages of the fashionable board ing-house in which her prosperous young nephew lived. He might, perhaps, have wished that Elvira Hodge had made his aunt's garments more stylish when he took her down to dinner, but lie was in no sense ashamed of her. When they were going down stairs with her hand timidly resting on his arm, ho made her very happy by looking down into lir r face and saying tenderly and heart ily, "I am BO glad you came Aunt Susan." "I thought you would be," she said, patting his arm affectionately. "You know you're the only boy I ever had." "And you were always the beet of mothers to me." Hut when she was alone in her room she wondered if it hail been wise for her to come after all. She did not doubt now that James was genuinely happy to see her, but she had discov ered that his betrothe 1 was the daugh- ter of a rich man, and tbut the wed ding was to be an elegant affair. Annt Susan feared she would bo out of place—that she might in her inno cence do or say something to givo James and his bride cause to bo ashame3 of her. The wedding was to take place the next evening, and there would be no opportunity for her to meet the bride or her family until then. All was so now and strange to her! She had expected to "take right hold" and help Mrs. Holbrook with the wedding dinner, even if she did "keep a girl." There was a big, new kitchen apron in her trunk, brought with Aunt Susan to be worn while she was "mak ing herself useful in Mrs. Holbrook's kitchen." It disappointed her to be told by her nephew that her services would not be required, and that a caterer would provide the supper. She did not know what a caterer was, and felt confused and uneasy, and went to sleep half wishing herself home. When, the next evening, she found herself in the beautiful house of Mr. Holbrook, surrounded by tinely dressed ladies and gentlemen who looked curiously at the odd-looking little old woman in tho qneerly-mado and old-fashioned black silk, she heart ily wished that she had not come. Mr. and Mrs. Holbrook wero as at tentive to her as they could be with a house full of guests ; but Aunt Susan soon found it convenient to slip off into a corner, where she hid like the little country mouse she wfts. But slio was glad, aftor all, that sho had como when James, looking so tall and happy and handsome, came into the groat parlors with his bride on his arm in her trailing, white satin dress and long veil. Aunt Susan was so com pletely overawed by this magnificence that, instead of going forward with the others to offer her congratulations, she slipped off tip-stairs to the room in which she had taken off her bonnet and shawl. In it was her wedding gift to Jimmy—the quilt that had but yester day seemed to her as beautiful and ap propriate a gift as she could bestow upon him Across the hall wa» the open door of a room almost filled with shining silver and glittering glass, with pictures, and rare ornaments, and beautiful books, gifts to James and his bride. Aunt Susan felt that her own offer ing, although it was tho gift of her own labor and love, would be out of place. It might offend her nephew and his bride to see it there. Some one might laugh and jeer at it, and she could not boar to think of that It seemed so poor and triflimr, now; she could not bear to think of allowing Jimmy and his wife to know that she had brought them such a gift. Sho turned back a corner of tho quilt, and looked at a piece of the pink and white muslin of which one of Jimmy's first garments have been made. A flood of tender memories filled her heart, and she buried her face in her gift and cried as she had not cried for years. Tli ere she sat for a long time, pay ing no heed to the noise and merri ment downstairs. Presently she heard a rustle of silk and satin in the hall, and a low murmur of voices. In a moment a pair of soft arms were around her neck, and a girlish voice was saying: "I am so glad that we have found you at last! We have been looking everywhere for you!" When Aunt Susan looked up she found the bride kneeling by" her side, while James was bending low over her. "You haven't been up here all this time, have you?" he said. "We have wondered where you were. Helen was so anxious to see you." "Of course I was," said the bride. "There is no one here I am so glad to see. James lias told me all about you, and it was so good of you to come so far to see lis married. You must kiss us both and wish us joy, won't you?" "If you'll let me," said Aunt Susan, with the tears still in her eyes. "Let you !" said James. "We should think it very strange if you didn't. What have you here? It looks like one of tho quilts you used to make. It is a quilt, isn't it?" Aunt Susan tried to conceal the quilt, but James took it from her and un folded it. Suddenly ho said : "Why, Aunt Susan, didn't you bring this for a wedding present?" "Well, I—l—did think I'd give it to your wife, James," said Aunt Susan, soberly. "I thought that—well—well, you see, I mado it ev'ry stitch myself and—and—there's lots of pieces in it from the first clothes you ever had, and—l thought maybe she'd like it be cause I did it ev'ry stitch myself,and—" "Like it?" cried Helen. "I shall value it above any gift I liavo had! It is beautiful—l never saw such exquis ite needlework ! What weeks of labor it must have cost you. lam so proud of it!" "She said them very words," said Aunt Susan to half a dozen of her de lighted friends who came to see her the day she reached home. "Sho was so tickled over tho quilt. Sho fairly cried when I showed her the blocks made out of pieces of Jimmy's things. "-lie said she'd think the world and all of it. She and Jimmy had togo off their weddin' tower in about an hour, and 1 expected to come on home that night; but Mr. and Mrs. Hol brook wouldn't hear to it. "Xlioy made me stay there a whole week, and they treated me as if I was ono of the greatest ladies in the land. They took me to ride ev'ry day, and they never seemed to mind a bit about my old-fashioned waj's and clothes. "I had a beautiful time; and the best part of it is that Jimmy and his wife are coming to mako me a visit on their way home from their tower next week. You never see such a splendid young woman as she is!" Terms—Bl.oo in Advance; 51.25 after Three Months. TRAPPING A LIVE TIUEB. HOW JUNO, THE LARGEST ONE IN THIS COUNTHT. WAS CAUGHT. The Man-Rating Unite was Induced to .lump Into a llig Pit—Secured After a Hard Fight. ¥ANY men have been around the world four or five times, but a man who has made the circle twenty-one times is an exception. This record-breaking globe-trotter, says the New York World, is Mr. J. B. Gaylord, of Inde pendence, lowa, Mr. Gaylord is known to all the circus people of this coun try as having owned shows of his own years ago, and having been foreign agent for P. T. Barnum for a number of years. He has amassed a fortune in bringing wild animals from their native jungles to the United States. He has captured and handled more tigers, lions and elephants than any other may alive in this country. A year or so ago he severed his con nection with the Barnum show, and is now about to make another animal collecting tour of the world for a new zoological garden about to be opened in a Western city. Mr. Gaylord looks upon the captur ing of tigers and lions as a matter of ordinary interest. He says the work of trapping wild animals is done so systematically now that there is no more danger attending it than catch ing a tame pet. -This is how he de scribed >the way the largest tigor ever brought to this country, Juno, now being trained at the Barnum head quarters in Bridgeport, was captured : "First we located her drinking place. Then we set a force of 150 natives to digging a hole sixteen feet square at the top, twenty feet deep and twenty-five feet square at the bottom, and carried the fresh earth a quarter of a mile off in the baskets. This was necessary, for if we had left any fresh soil about the boast would scent it and change her course ingoing to drink. Long before nightfall our trap was ready for tho tiger. The surface of the ditch was covered over with light bamboos very carefully. Then dead leaves and foliage were spread about until there was no sign that there was an excavation anywhere in sight. This last work was done with extraordinary precaution, for if we had left any trace of our prepara tions our work would all have gone for naught- Now, in all this work there was absolutely no excitement or thrilling escapes in heating off other animals. We knew we were laying a Uup fui iliu locgtAi ttjau-cotor ever seen on the Malay peninsula, but what of it ?" "Well, after we had covered the hole carefully, we took out our young lamb and placed him in a specially prepared jacket of straps and liung him in gypsy-kettle fashion directly over the centre of the big hole that had sloping sides. "Now, I suppose you think the tiger just walks into that hole. Not at all. He is attracted by the lamb's bleating, and prepares for his meal. He reaches the trap, but instead of walking right up and putting up his paw to seize the lamb, he circles round and round at a distance. He is wary. But the de siro for a meal gets the best of him, and he makes a leap for the lamb. He has gauged the distance so well he lands right over the center of the pit. Down he goes with a roar—a roar of rage and fear, for he has found him self in a bad hole at last. "Juno made a great light. It was more than four hours before she was exhausted, as all we had to do was to wait until she had completely tired herself out by attempting to leap out of the pit. Then we brought up the tiger cage, a ten-foot square bamboo affair, with one side open. The bars of bamboo were a few inches apart, and about four inches thick. These bars were securely fastened by smaller bamboo and ropes of wiry grass. Our Hock of natives grasped the cage on all sides and let it down quickly on tho exhausted beast below. As the cage was let down over the tiger a score of the natives quickly slid down on top of it. Juno was too exhausted to make another struggle, and she lay quietly in the cage. "We took a number of prepared bamboo poles about an inch thick and pointed at one end. They bend but do not break, and are very strong, The men on top of the cage in tho ti ger pit poked these pieces of bamboo under cage and tiger—an easy matter, as the soil was very soft. They fast ened them lengthwise and crosswise a great many times until the tiger was in a cage so strong that if she had the strength of a dozen animals she could not get out. "Ropes 'of bamboo were put dowu and cage and tiger were lifted to the surface and placed on a litter of poles. A score of natives picked up cage and tiger and trotted off to the seaport town. "There are men who make a splen did living out of trapping tigers and lions. The king of them all is a man who lives at Padang, one of the Malay Island towns. For three generations the relatives of this man, who is known as Siueen. have been tiger and lion-killers. They have killed and captured more, lions and tigers than any other known family, and Siueen has broken the record, too. He is nl most an object of worship at Padang. He has been m the business all his life and kills or captures about 100 tigers every year. The Government pays him fifty dollars for the head of a ti ger, and he gets a good sum besides for all he captures. He is really a splendid specimen physically for his height, five feet four inches. He is like a block of iron, his muscular power is so great. Sineen has made a fortune out of tiger-hunting and dresses in eilkcu garments. NO. 48. THE SECRET OF HAPPINESS. Aro you almost disgusted With life, little man? '* - .. I will tell you n wonderful trick That will bring yon contentment If anything can— i Do something for somebody, quick : Do something for somebody, quick' Are you awful tired With pluy, little girl? Weary, discouraged, and sick? I'll tell you the loveliest Game in the world— Do something fir somebody, quick ; Do something for somebody, quick ! """ Though it rains like the rain Of the flood, little man, And the clouds are forbidding and thick. You can make the sun shine In your soul, little man— Do something for somebody, quick ; Do something for somebody, quick ! Though the skies are like brass Overhead, little girl. And the walk like a well-heated brick ; And all earthly affairs In a terrible whirl? Do something for somebody, quick , Do something for somobody, quick ! - Christian Herald. HUMOIt OF THE DAY. Be sure you're right, then agree with your wife.—Reading Times. It is generally a great blow to a cat die to have its light put out.—Roch ester Democrat. You never see an old man who in serts that he understands woman —Milwaukee Journal. A dumh man frequently makes his presence in a community known by his calling.—Boston Courier. Almost any employe can tell you that some one is liable to be fired when the boss gets hot.—Troy Press. Maude—"Did he marry her for her money?" Leila--"No ; for her father's." —Kate Field's Washington. Hattio—"See Cbollie Softed oVer there, buried in thought." Hannah— "Whose?"—Detroit Free Press. All the world may love a lover, but before an average jury the maid's chances are as ten to one.—Life. When a man is about to fail he usually tries to work all of his frienda into the trouble.—Atchison Globe. Speaking of hollow mockery, doesn't a hungry parrot come very near an swering that description ? Buffalo Courier. Many may understand woman, but it generally puzzles her horse to tell wliat olic i« driving in.— Courier. Our idea of a Christian is a man who doesn't laugh when it rains on a picnic party to which he was not invited.— Athison Globe. Mrs. Banks—"l do hate to discharge my servant." Mrs. Rivers— "I wish you had mine. You'd enjoy it."— Brooklyn Life. Tom—"How do you know she was out when you called?'' Jack—"l heard her ask the girl to tell me she was."— New York Times. Leave an order for work with a man and tell him that you are in no par ticular hurry and he will do it that day.—Atchison Globe. No matter how hopeless the future may be to other men, the good mathe matician always has something to count on.—Troy Press. Ragson—"How are you, old fellow! What are you working at now?" Old iron (tired and cross) "My vaca tion."—Chicago Tribune. Miss Prim is of the opinion that no lady who had any claim to modesty would regard undressed food as a deli cacy.—Boston Transcript. "Is your friend Wilkins the sort of a man who would borrow a dollar from you and never pay it back?" "Nixie! Not from me."—Detroit Tribune. Mrs. Van Twiller (who mistakes Doc tor Jovial for a physician)—" Anil where do you practice, Doctor?" The Rov. Doctor Jovial— "Ah, madam, I do not practice; I only preach."— Harlem Life. Young Wife—"Now, sir. I've given you half my picnic pies, and you promised to work for them—" Trump —"Bless your sweet eyes, mum, 1 did—as I wuz catin'of 'em."—Cleve land Plain Dealer. Jess (in restaurant) "l'm hungry enough to eat a horse and chase tho rider." Bess "What are you going to order?" Jess—"Waiter, bring me three cream puffs and uoup of cocoa. '" —New York Times. She---"I never saw such a man ! He never has any money but he fritters it away." He—"Aren't you then afraid of marrying him?" She—"Oh, dear, no. Aft r he has married me he'll never have any money. "—Boston Transcript. "You see that jvr-ig couple in front of us? Well, they're jus* married." "How do you know?" "Because he treads so carelessly on the skirt of her dress." "But that is no sign." "Oh, yes, it is; he'll be much more careful is soou I.K he ilnd.a out what her dresses cost.Fliegende Bluetter. Rain, But N'o Clouds. A curious natural phenomenon is re ported from the neighborhood of Pitts burg. It was a bright clear day in Pleasant valley and the entire neigh borhood, when suddenly a heavy rain began to fall, without the slightest warning, and a den-' black cloud ap peared over thy valley. For forty-five minutes the rain fell in torrents, swell ing the little stream that flow t through the valley into a raging tcureut, which inundated houses, swept away several bridges and nearly drowned several people. Two miles away there was no rain at all and no signs of a storm. Picayune.