SULLIVAN REPUBLICAN.
W M. CHENEY, Publisher.
YOL. X.
The grip is pronounced by a Vienna
physician of high standing to be mias
matic in character.
A county in New York State is c on
sidering becoming its own insurer against
fire. One argument used is that the
county having $100,000,000 of property
is more responsible than most of tho
insurance companies.
The San Fiancisco Chronicle opines
that the cultivation of a peaceful dispo
sition is not calculated to inspire respect
in such countries as Chile, "llad we
been as truculent in our dealings with
fifth-rate countries as England," it be
lieves, "tho Chileans would not be
speaking of the Yankees and their navy
■with contempt."
The new monitor Miantonomah, with
four teu-iuch guns aud a line lot of
rapid lire weapons, will prove a formid
able antagonist to any but the very heavi
est foreigu ironclads, observes the San
Francisco Chronicle. Stationed at tho
right place she could keep a whole fleet
of cruisers from entering and approach
ing close to New York harbor.
Tho proposition to have the old sliip
President, which was captured from the
United States by the British in the War
of 1812, transferred to Chicago for tho
Columbian Exhib tion, is very generally
approved by the officers of the navy so
far as its seutinvjnt goes, but the idea is
hardly practical, suggests die Boston
Transcript. The old ship now lies in
the West India Dock near London, and,
although she makes an excellent ship for
the nominal headquarters of British navy
officers who are assigned to duty in Lon
don, and an excellent drill ship as well,
she is totally unable, because of her ad
vanced age, to cross the Atlantic.
The chief figures of the chiei' medical
officer ot tho Prefecture of Police show
that lunacy has increased in Paris,
France, in the last sixtesa years some
thirty per cent. Tho inc lease is due to
the prevalence of t»vo morbid typas,gen
eral paralysis and alcoholic insanity.
Alcoholic insanity is twice as prevalent
now as it was fifteen years ago. Almost
a third of the lunacy cases are due to this
disease, and tin tendency of it is to be
come more violent and to show a more
marked homicidal character. A dreadful
pecuiarity of it is that it desc ,'nds to the
children of its victims, fae extreme use
fulness of many of the candidates for
the guillotine must have been observed
of late years, and the explanation is
probably to be found in alcoholic in
sanity.
If the Prince of Wales persists in his
reported intention of marrying his chil
dren into English families, observes tho
San Francisco Examiner, he will give his
house a new lease of popularity that it
needs. Albert Victor, the heir presump
tive, is to marry Princess .Mary of Teck
who is practically an English girl. His
brother, Prince George, is said to be en
gaged to the daughter ot an English
Duke. The eldest daughter is the wife
of the Duke of Fife, and it is reported
that the second daughter is to marrv an
English nobleman. The British nation
has shown a good deal of irritation at the
marriage of Queen Victoria's children to
the little royalty of Germany. In th?
brave old days wheu England was ma le,
Englishmen and Englishwomen were
go«d enough for royal blood to mate
with, and tiie English people appear to
believe that the policy i* a good one to
day.
At last it has dawned upon the people of
Northwestern Oiiio, announcas the Pitts
burg Dispatch, that their supply of nat
ural gas is almost exhausted. So confi
dent have they been in its performance
that the nature of the discovery is almost
startling. To-day not more than one
tenth of the manufactories in Northwest
ern Ohio arc supplied with natural gas.
At the same time the supply for private
consumption has been so decreased that
many a family has tossed the gasburner
into the back yard aud returned to hick
ory and coal. Many others kept con
stant supplies of coal on hand ready for
emergency at any time. Coal is also
burned with the gas when it is low by a
majority of the consumers. Since gas
was first used for fuel here the pressure
has decreased over 350 pounds. Tha vol
ume, however, is sullicient for all the
drains upon it. The trouble is that the
pressure is too weak to force the gas to
the burners. It lies sluggish and dor
mant in the mains, or in a state of inertia
in the rock and wells.
KISSING THE ROD.
0 heart of mine, we shouldn't
Worry so!
What we've missed of calm we couldn't
Have, you know!
What we've met of stormy pain
And of sorrow's driving rain
We can better meet again
If it blow.
We have error! in that dark hour
We have known
When our tears fell with tho shower.
All alone—
Were not shine and shower blent
As the gracious Master meaut?
Let us temper our content
With his own.
For, we know, not every morrow
Can be sad;
So, forgetting all the sorrow
We have bad,
1 vet us fold away our fears
And put by our foolish tears,
And through all the coining years
Just be glad.
—J. W. Riley, in Indianapolis Journal.
THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A
MANUSCRIPT
BY CLIFTON ESDAILE.
"W 1 NLIKE Franken-
Ha £ stein, my creator
, i| 1 loved the thing she
SSJI had created. Out
1 innumerable
I t scraps was I created,
and built upon a
disused skeleton of
JvY % ® some old romance.
Nevertheless, I was
beloved and tender
ly nurtured.
When I say that my fair creator was
ambitious for me, you will, I trust, not
misunderstand her. She craved no
jewels or costly raiment for her beloved
offspring; she but asked that I might
live, and appear in print. My creator,
I have siuco observed with pride, was
very beautiful.
The first distinct recollection I have
is that my leaves fluttered together on
the dainty desk before which .sat a sweet
girl-woman. In her hand sho still held
a gold pen, but the ink on its nil) was
quite dry, and she seemed buried in
thought.
I looked up at her rc9pousively. and
she took me up gentty aud read me in a
soft voice, which has ever since seemed
to me closely related to the sweet odor
of lilacs which were then blooming.
From that moment I lived. As I lay on
the desk before her, there was a sudden
noise at the lattice; then someone said
in a low voice, "Sister!"
My creator started up so suddenly
that I knew Sister must be her name;
and 1 always think of her by that name,
though I have since heard her called by
several others.
Sister went quickly to the window,and
said, in a frightened whisper: "Jack,
why have you come here, and in broad
daylight, too? Uncle will storm so if
he finds it out, aud 1 shall never be able
to reconcile' him to you."
By this time a young boy, three or
four years younger than Sister, had
climbed in at the open window, and I i
saw how much they looked alike; but !
his manner, clothing, and voice were
quite different. All the people I have
met in the world, except Sister, are like
Jack—men, I believe, they are called.
In the mean time Jack was asking her
for money. "I simply must have fifty
dollars to-day, Sister; you can easily get
it out of uncle."
"No, Jack; he will give me anything
in the world but money; and that, he
says, he will not give me."
'•So he knows my gentle little Sister
would give it to naughty Jack? By the
way, Sis, I think a bean stalk would be
better for Jack to climb than a lattice
aud a lilac-bush. Kindly sec that it is
changed before I come again."
Jack had a roguish, merry face, and
Sister was evidently fond of him. I be
gan to feel a strange, sad feeling about
half way down my second chapter,
which I have learned since from conver
sation with other MSS. is not an uncom
mon ailment, and is named jealousy.
Sister looked cautiously around, then
flushing a little, said, "Jack, I am try
ing to earn fifty dollars for you."
Jack gave a low whistle of astonish
ment. "Poor little Sister, why, how
can you earn money?" he asked, looking
at the silk-robed figure before him.
"I have written a story."
"You don't say!" and Jack regarded
her with surprise and pride. "Wasn't it
hard to do?"
Sister came over to the desk and ca
ressed me with her pretty hand. "At
first it was hard, but not when I really j
got started. Oh, then, Jack, I loved i
it."
It was sunset, aud the gay light flashed j
on the pretty jewels in Sister's rings as |
she patted me tenderly.
"But the trouble is, I must have the '
money at once for—"
A noise was heard in the hall, and,
without finishing his sentence, Jack slid
out tli3 window, and Sister hastily took
up a book. A rap on the door. Sister
went and opened it, still holding the
volume, with her forefinger between the
leaves.
A tall and handsome old gentleman
entered. lie bowed with old-school
courtesy, saying: "It is such fine
weather, I have ordered the carriage.
Are you ready to drive?"
Sister looked into tho kind though
LAPORTE, PA., FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 1892.
severe face. "Yes, uncle; I should like
of all things this sweet evening to take
a drive with you."
So she put on a pretty wide straw hat,
and went away with the old man, and I
felt lonely.
The sunset had gone, the pink and
blue after-glow had also left, and the
gray came in and tinged everything,
until at last the black came and
swaliowed up what was left. I must
have gone to sleep then, for when I
awoke a great soft light shone in the
window, and Sister was standing before
it, saying, softly:
"flow pale my white lilacs are there
in the moonlight!" Theu, as a slight
noise was heard in the hall, she
whispered, "Is that you, Jefferson?"
"Yes, miss," came from a very black
old man, who entered and stood upon
the threshold, as if awaiting orders.
"Jefferson, have you saved up fifty
dollars?"
"Yes, missie, I has dat; an', fo' do
land's-sake.missie, Jefferson dun' no' what
to done wid dat same fifty dollars."
"Jefferson, will you lend it to me?
There is something I want to get, and I
don't want uncle to know, and I will pay
you back ever so soon."
"I's jest too pleased, missie. I was
goin' fur to ask you to keep dat money
fo' me fo' de present;" and the old man
hurried away.
Sister came and stood in the moon
light, and I saw she was crying, but she
only said, "Dear, kind old Jefferson!"
Presently he came back, and handed
something to Sister, saying: "I thank
| ye, missie, fur keeping of it for me;"
| and he hurried away again.
Sister went to the window. "Jack,"
she whispered.
Then 1 heard loud voices, and she
handed the money out the window to
some one.
"God bless you, Sister 1"
"Good-night; be a good boy, Jack."
Then Sister came and knelt down by
the desk, and her beautiful hair rested
on my pages; then splash came two tears,
and so I was baptized.
I was not u nice child; but that, I
am convinced, was my own fault. Sis
ter, however, thought I was delightful,
i and though she ought to know, her
opinion was not corroborated by others.
I I awoke one morning to liud myself
being roughly handled for the first time.
A great ugly man was seated by a huge
desk in a big office. There were many
other men somewhat like him, all sit
ting at great desks in the same office,
but the particular man to whom I refer
was more disagreeable, I am convinced,
than any of the others.
He tore off the paper wrappings in
which I had been swathed, and flung
them iuto a great capacious scrap basket.
At that time my knowledge of scrap
baskets was limited, but subsequently
this part of my education was corrected.
I fluttered my leaves coquettishly as he
glanced at me, but I at once became
aware that he seemed to see through me
without looking at me. He fumbled me
over, reading a portion of the last chap
ter, then said, sotto voce: "More trash;"
then, aloud, to a young man at the next
desk:
"Here, bundle this back. I think,
however, I tore the address, so look out
for it."
Then he slipped a rubber band over
me, and I tumbled pell-mell into the big
basket after the shreds of my envelope.
At that time I was the only occupant of
the basket, but in an hour, one after an
other, thirty other manuscripts were with
me in the basket.
The youth who gathered us up seemed
in a hurry, and left me, with my torn
address, till the following morning; then,
having more time, I presume, he picked
me up, not unkindly, though he laughed
in an amused way, glancing down my
first page.
"Poor girl! (evidently a girl), she will
be disappointed, doubtless."
Do you suppose he meant Sister?
At home again! Aud Sister did seem
disappointed; but she read the little
printed slip, and then wearily looked
over my leaves.
None were torn or soiled, so she kissed
me gently, and directly I wa3 sent on
another voyage.
My experience was much the same as
before. The printed slip I brought back
was a different size and shape, and I ob
served with anguish that my dear crea
tor seemed worried, and I feared she was
disappointed in me, or perhaps growing
to dislike me, as others did.
One afternoon when I returned from
a peregrination longer than usual, I was i
handed to my fair creator where she I
walked in the sweet-scented green and j
gold light of the garden, accompanied
by a tall and haudsomc young man.
She sighed, "Again!" as she received
me; then I trembled in her fingers, and
somehow my string became untied, and
I escaped from my wrappings.
Her companion hastened to pick me
up, handling mo with a consideration
no other man had evinced toward, me.
Then he said to Sister, taking both her
pretty hands as he placed me in her
keeping.
"Sweetheart, if you love me, why in
sist on this long, this endless delay?"
Sister looked down, aud a rosy color
stole over her face, while her lips quiv
ered.
"It is so bard to speak of. I have
contracted a debt, and, until I can repay
it by my own earnings, I cannot marry;
it would not bo honorable; and no one
will publish my story."
She was still looking down, sad and
embarrassed, so she did not note her
companion's expression, but I thought
ho was about to rend the pale evening
air with a wild peal of laughter, so
sparkling were his eyes with mirth and
happiness.
Imagine my astonishment on seeing
( him quite grave when she lifted her eyes,
as he said, sympathetically:
"Yes, I understand, dear. By-the
way, have you tried the Gushington
Publishing House?"
Yes; I had but just returned from
their commodious scrap-basket. Ha
seemed very kind. When he left us,
Sister took me to her pretty silk-draped
room. She sat by the open window,
and I lay still in her lap, and wondered
from Title fo Finish what I could do to
make her happy.
It was, I think, two days after that a
letter lay beside me on Sister's desk. It
was from the house of Gushington, and
contained a check for seventy-five dol
lars, and a note from the editcr statinir
that by mistake I had gotteu in a pile of
rejected MSS., and been sent to her by
his assistant without his knowledge.
Would she kindly overlook this,and per
mit his house the honor of printing her
work?
Then you should have seen her. She
was like a glad June morning in her
loveliness. She laughed and cried all at
once. ,
When I returned to the editor's de?k,
he read me over carefully, theu he ex
tracted quite a long letter from a pigeon
hole, and I had an idea it concerned my
self. This surmise was correct.
The august presence deigned to per
mit a pleasant smile to play over his
features like a flitting sunbeam as ho an
swered the letter sotto-voice- "True,dear
friend,we do sometimes print even worse
from one cause or another." Then I
was sent to press iu the bauds of a sad
little "devil."
Sister and her husband have always
maintained a peculiar fondness for me,
but the rest of my readers say, "Strange
how this magazine is degenerating I"
Do you suppose they refer unkindly to
me as I appear in "print."—Harper's
Weekly.
About Kid Gloves.
A town called Grenoble, France, is
the place where most kid gloves come
from; yet of the twenty thousand or
more tourists who pass though the capi
tal of the Isere Department eaph year not
more than ten ever go out of their way
to learn something of this great national
industry.
For it is national, as France holds the
chief position in the world in this line
of commerce, and wherever you go you
are sure to find that the best gloves are
of French manufacture. This success is
not due to a question of taste only, but
to excellence of workmanship also.
There is nothing mechanical about
glove making; it is all hand labor; there
fore experienced and skillful opeiatives
are necessary to produce good merchan
dise. But as Frenchmen do not like to
leave their homes, it is the Belgians, the
Germans and the Italians who go abroad
aud devote themselves to the production
of an inferior kind of goods for toilet
purposes in other countries.
At Grenoble alone 1,200,000 dozen
pairs of gloves are manufactured an
nually. This represents a value of
$7,000,000 to $7,200,000, and this
gives employment to 25,000 workpeople
of both sexes. There are 4000 mon and
21,000 women residing in a rayon of
thirty-eight miles around Grenoble who
live by this work. Glove makinir, theu,
is interesting from a social point of view,
as it is one of the few callings open to
female labor iu which they can earn re
spectable wages without abandoning hus
bands, homes and little ones.
When I add that out of the $7,200,-
000 worth of gloves in that region at
least $3,000,000 are distributed iu wages
among an almost infinite number of fam
ilies, you can imagine the auxiety with
which recent parliamentary deliberations
over the proposition to franchise the raw
material were awaited by the population.
A tax on skins brought iuto France
would have meant ruin to many hard'
working people who get a comfortablo
living out of the industry.—New York
liecorder.
A Curious Mutiny.
There are some curious points in the
case of the mutineers on board the
French ship Aime, who were rocently
tried at St. Pierre, Newfoundland. The
vessel started from Bordeaux but had
not proceeded very far upon its course
when the crew deposed the captain and
put him in irons. The first mate took
command. His purpose was to reach
the Azores. But in a few hours it be
came apparent that he did not know
what he was about. Accordingly, the
crew sought their ex-captain next day,
lashed him to a mast, and commanded
him to steer for the Azores. He refused
to do so unless he was released. The crew
set to work again on their own account
—got more muddled thau before, and
finally accepted his condition. Forth
with he put the ship about, and carried
them to St. Pierre, where they were
promptly seized, tried and condemned.
The extraordinary feature in all this is
the fuct that the captain was the only
man on board having any knowledge of
navigation, and the question arises
whether this condition of affairs is com
mon on French ships, or in the mercan
tile marine of any other nation.. In all
well found ships the first mate, at least,
is supposed to carry a master's certifi
cate.—Boston Transcript.
Terms —sl.2s in Advance; $1.60 after Three Mentha
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.
White tar is new.
Electric cranes increase.
Chess matches by telephone are
popular in England.
A mechanical letter-stamper worked
by electricity is being tested at the post
office in Washington.
A German inventor has patented a
system of employing the trolley electric
system to propel boats on canals or
rivers.
The Industrial Society of Mulhouse,
England, offers a silver medal for the
application, in any form, of electricity
to calico printing.
Immense bituminous deposits have
been discovered in Alsace, Germany,and
no less than seven companies have re
cently been formed to work them.
It is proposed to make the employ
ment of the electric light in the German
factories compulsory in places where
artificial light is required during working
hours.
Professor Dewar, an English scientist,
found, in making some experiments with
liquid oxygen, that it has strong mag
netic properties, adhering closely to a
magnet until entirely dissipated.
The output of the Baldwin Locomotive
Works, Philadelphia, Penn., last year
was 918 locomotives, of which 101 were
compounds. The output for 1890 ex
ceeded this number by thirty-five.
The iron work of the railway up the
Higi, Switzerland, has been found to
suffer less from rust than that of the or
dinary surface roads. The ties are won
derfully well preserved, those laid seven
teen years ago being still in good condi
tion.
In popular histories of the seveD
wonders of the world %ve read that the
Pharos, the first light-house, could be
seen at a distance of 100 miles. In or
der for this to have been possible the
Pharos must have been a mile and a
quarter in height.
A now torpedo was recently tried at
Portsmouth, England. It is intended
for discharge under the water, and with
engines developing fifty-two horse-power,
it can realize a speed of thirty knots an
hour. The maximum diameter of tlje
torpedo is eighteen inches.
Down to the time cf Homer, who
flourished 207 B. C., as little was known
of the surface of the eaith is now
known of the interior. Greece was then
regarded as the center of the earth, whicli
was theu surrounded at the distance of
500 mile* by the ocean river. Later the
land was extended further and a limited
form given to the old continent.
Very extensive and valuable deposits
of nickel have been found at Sudbury,
the junction of the Canadian Pacific and
the "Soo" Road about 130 miles east of
Saul Ste. Marie. The mining is confined
largely to three companies, one of which
is au American company with headquar
ters at Cleveland, Ohio, aDd its works
represent an investment of between sl,-
000,000 and 62,000,000.
To distinguish genuine butter from
oleomargarine the following test is recom
fnended: Draw a knife through a piec
of the questioned butter and separate the
[wrts thus divided. If it ever saw the
inside of a churn there will be watery
Exudations in the track of the knife, but
if it is a combination of prepared and
disguised fat there will be a smooth
greasy surface only. This test is largely
used by butter merchants.
A Famous Maine Mansion.
The old Pepperell mansion at Kittery
Point, Me., built over 200 years ago,
has probably sheltered more famous peo
ple than any other house on this side of
the Atlantic, with the exception of
Mount Vernon and Monitcello. The
house was built by the first William
Pepperell, a great merchant and ship
builder of his time, who accumulated
vast wealth by trade, and his mansion
reflected the extent of his means. Fac
ing the sea and surrounded by a great
park where herds of deer disported, the
old mansion was a delightful place of
residence. The famous Sir William
Pepperell, son of the builder, enlarged
and adorned the mansion at the time of
his marriage, iu 1734. This William
Pepperell, the only Ainericau baronet,
was a remarkable man. lie was the
richest mau in the colonies, and had
at times as many as 200 vessels afloat.
He was a successful General, and was
seen at Louisburg, and his political in
fluence was very great.—New York
Sun.
The Ainericau Sandwich.
"The great American sandwich is now
an established National institution," said
Frauk P. Brodie at Hurst's Hotel. "Did
you ever think how the term originated?
A great many people suppose that the
popular comestible is in some way con
nected with the Sandwich Islands. This
is a mistake, because the civilize'' world
had sandwiches long before it knew it
had any Sandwich Islands. Anothei
popular fallacy is that the sandwich was
invented by the English Earl of Sand
wich, from whom it took its name. The
fact is, the name of the mau who foisted
the sandwich on the world is unknown.
It was known, however, in the times of
the Homan Empire, and the soldiers of
Claudius Caesar included it in their ra
tions. As an article of food the sand
wich dates from the time to which the
memory of man runneth not back. As
an instrument of torture aud death it
made its advent with the first railroad
eating house."—St. Louis Star-Sayings.
XO. 20.
ATTAINMENT.
Passing, I saw a woman fair and sweet
With lilies at her feet^
A flush of triumph on her lifted face
As if her soul victorious in its r&Te
In Love's ethereal flight unfettered sprang
through space.
I saw her once again, her sad eyes wet
With limitless regret,
Pallid with countless wounds that hidden
bled;
The lilies in her pathway lying dead.
Yet, in despair, sublime liar soul still swept
o'erhead.
Crowned by its own defeat.
—Mrs. Whiton-Stone, in Boston Transcript.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
A double chin—when two women
meet.
You can't measure a girl's love by its
sighs.—Elmira Gazette.
Of two women choose the one that
will have you.—Texas Sittings.
Nebraska has au Indian lawyer. Of
course he is a Sioux.—Minneapolis Tri
bune.
The dark ages are the ones that elderly
spinsters refuse to divulge.—St. Joseph
News.
It is when the turkey is in the oven
thatthccook studies Browning.—Lowell
Courier.
A literary man becomes a nobleman
when he is baron of ideas.—Lowell
Courier.
A statesman can always get a pull by
going to the dentist's office.—Binghnni
ton Republican.
There are too many people in the
world who use their ne3t eggs to make
cake of.—Atchison Globe.
Smiles that crack in the middle with
their metallic hardness convey but little
cordiality.—Charleston News.
When wild young men start out for
fun they are going to have it if they have
to fight for it.—Dallas News.
Of course it is possible for a woman
to be "fair and square," but we like her
better if she is round.—Boston Post.
The debtor may have the consolation
of knowing that there is always some
body thinking of him.—Columbus Post.
Mrs. Bacon—"What a sour look Dr.
Pill has." Little "'fimnic--"I guess he
takes his own medicine, mamma."—
Statesman.
Stephen Tehee has been elected second
chief of the Cherokee Nation. • Well,
we should giggle.—.Memphis Appeal-
Ava'anche.
A man's character is like a photo
graphic negative. It is black until it
has been subjected to the chemistry of
circumstances.
"Did Ann gain much by goiug to
V.vssar?" "Yes. She gained au Eon
the end of her uame. She is Anne now."
—Brooklyn Life.
"A man can accomplish a great deal,"
said the Missouri Judge, "if he only has
time—therefore I give you four years."
—Columbus Post.
"This is a bad sign," says Ilicks, as
the shingle of Bludboory, Blithers tfc Co.
has blown from its place and landed ou
his high hat.—Harper's Bazar.
The man who never puts off till to
morrow what he cau do to-day must in
evitably eat a great deal more tiiau is
good for him.—Somerville Journal.
"Let's go into the restaurant and get
something to eat." "But I'm not hun
gry." "That's no matter; you will be
before you get anything."—Tid-Bits.
"Why do you goto the concert if you
don't care for music?" "To amuse my
self. You have no idea how happy I
feel when it's over."—Fliegende Blaetter.
Patient—"Doctor, I fancy, somehow,
I've got a touch of the gout." Doctor—
"Fancy, my dear sir! If you had, you
wouldn't fancy—you'd know."—Comic.
He—"l never can understand you,
but I suppose that's natural." She—
"Why?" lie—"Well, I suppose its im
possible for a pretty girl to be plain."—
New York Press.
"I am afraid that Gei>rge is trifling of
me." "Why, dear?" "He has been
telling me lam too good a woman to be
the wife of such a man as he is."—ln
dianapolis Journal.
New Clerk—"What do the jobbers
mean by putting <c. o. d.' ou all the
packages they send us?" Jeweler—"l
guess they think we are a little tishy."—
Jeweler's Weekly.
Watts—"Every man has his own
secret sorrow, I guess." Potts—"Yes,
indeed. Even the happiest appearing
man has a skeleton in his midst."—ln
dianapolis Journal.
"All is fair in love and war, isn't it?"
she said. "I don't know,"he replied
doubtfully, "I've been iu love a good
many times, but 1 never was married."—
Detroit Free Pre3s.
"How are you coming 011 with your
tragedy?" "Better than I expected. I've
killed off all the principal characters ex
cept two, and they are not on speaking
terms."—Texas Siftings.
"A cynic is a mau who is tired of the
world, is he not?" the young language
studcut asked. "No, no, my child," re
plied the knowing tutor. "A cynic is a
man of whom the world is tired."
"What did the minister preach
about?" asked a lady of her little son,
who had attended church. "He preached
about two hours, ma," said the
small hopeful.—Detroit Free Press.