SULLIVAN REPUBLICAN.
W M, CHENEY, Publisher.
VOL. IX.
The price of platinum has advanced
fully 100 per cent., owing to its in
creased use for electrical purposes.
The cheapest railway faro in the
world will be that on tho Central Lon
don Railroad, on which there will be
three workmen's trains daily, the fare
for sis miles being but two cents.
It appears that tho Wyoming Legisla
ture, which recently imposed » tax of $2
on bachelors, was electe I by woman's
suffrage. "This is significant," observes
the New York Commercial Advertiser.
A cycling carps has been added to the
equipment of the Salvation Army, an
nounces the New York Commercial Ad
vertiser. Fifty young men have been re
quested to volunteer to travel for three
years on •wheels.
Tho tunnel that will connect Butler
Valley, Penn., with the bottom of the
mammoth Ebervale vein will be, thinks
the New York Tines, on3 of the great
est engineering feats of the century. It
will open an almost inexhaustible sup
ply of coal, and will servo as a
drain for all the colleries in that vi
cinity.
A good illustration of the expansion
of the world's trade during the last
thirty years is afforded by the produc
tion of petroleum in the United States.
In 1859, 84,000 gallon* were produced
in the Pennsylvania and New York oil
fields, and in 18' JO, 63'.),029,966 gallons
were exported from the various State3
which now produce the oil.
A new kind of stamps will soon be
introduced in the postal telegraph ser
vice of Russia with a view to securing
the inviolability of the privacy of letters.
The new stamp is printed on very thin
paper, and cannot be used again if it is
once put upon a letter. When used
wet and taken oil the envelope it leaves
an indelible impression upon the spot
where it was attached, so that if a new
stamp is put upon the same spot the im
pression of the first stamp can be seen
through it.
So great is the demand for silver
dimes, that they are turned out now at
the rate of 100,000 a day. No less thau
§3,176,477 in silver dimes have beeu
struck oil in the past three years. For
this purpose, states the Detroit Free
Press, all the uncurrent silver coin is
being reworked, notably the silver half
dollar, which is a clumsy pocket-piece
and very unpopular. The novelty bauks
which the dime savings institutions are
sending out is supposed to be answerable
for the sudden demand. The three
mints of Philadelphia, New Orleans and
San Francisco are kept busy supplying
the wants of the people in this line.
There is no doubt, states the Detroit
Free Pre™, that the world's fair will bo
somewhat influenced by European poli
tics. With Germany and England in
close friendship aud Russia allied with
France to offset the power of the drei
bund, there is very sensitive and jealous
feeling in all quarters, au i our commis
sioners will need to use intioite tact in
order to brius all these countries to the
point of making generous exhibitions at
Chicago. Of England wo are certain,
and probably of Germany; but France
seems coy, and it is not unlikely that
Russia will need a degree of persuasion
to induce her to do justice either to her
self or to the fair.
John Lickenheim, of Riley County,
Kansas, who was a scout aud fought iu
Kansas as early as 1855, and built the
first log cabin in Riley County, wheu
in Kansas City, Mo., a few days ago,
gave in his reminiscences, some idea
of the rapidity with which that city has
replaced nature. "I never thought,"
he said, "such things could bo possible
on the ground I used to camp on. When
I was here last, some twenty-five years
ago, this was all unbroken sod abaut
here. Why, I usel £o camp a few years
before tint down in the hollow ic the
center of tho city, and I have watered
my horse lots of times at a spring on
Troost avenue. Dozens oi time 3 I have
fought the Indians or the forces of Gen
eral Price along Kansas City's river
front. On one occasion Price with his
40.000 men threatened to drive us blue
coats into the Missouri and the Kaw at
this point, but we wero reinforced and
ho had to beat a retreat. In 1860 the
old Missouri had its arms spread all over
the ground where the Union Depot now
stands, and I used to tish down there."
DO BIGHT.
Do rlghtt
And let the fools laugh on.
To-day they're here—to-morrow gone;
While they with folded arms survey.
Tread duty's path and clear the way.
Be brave; though long and dark the night,
Morn always brings the glorious light;
Look up, and fair ambitions flame
Shall light you onto wealth and fame.
Fight on; the world shall know your name.
Do right
Do right! 1 . i
And bear proud folly's scorn,
Their night shall be your waking morn
When laurels crown you; such as they
Will feel the touch of cold decay.
When grateful thousands bless
They'll feel cold want nud sore distress
So battle bravely; fight to win!
Fear not the strife; hood not the din; ;
Bear well the cross the crown to win;
Do right 1
—B. J. M'Dermott, in New York News.
a ch7r
Jo Taliaferro's father was poor, his
father had been poor before him, and
bis grandfather back of him again. It
was m his great-grandfather's days, and
through his great-graudfather's ha ads,
that the money had slipped away from
the family. Since then no ono had had
the energy to replace it.
"It was too much trouble," said the
Taliaferros, who pronounced their name
"Tolly ver."
Jo's father did make a half-hearted
effort. He wandered from his home in
Alabama up North somehow, and ran
away with old Snyder B. Simes's daugh
ter and only child. Snyder B. Simes,
lumber merchant, was a Maine man who
bad made his pile himself and meaut to
keep it. lie burned his daughter's let
ters unopened and made a new will.
"If my money's to be spent in riotous
living, 1 mean to spend it myself," he
said, buttoning up his pockets.
Mrs. Taliaferro l>urst into tears when
she first saw her new Southern home;
then <;ot up and put on an apron and
began to clean the house. This she con
tinued to do until the daj of her death.
She never learned to ad list herself to
her surroundings, nor tb /t it is some
times a good woman's futy to ignore
dirt. She , washed ua-f scrubbed and
cleaned, and was finall ;/ swept out of
this world on a sea of soap-suds—another
ruartyr to the great god of cleanliner*.
She left one little boy behin . her,
named Jo, to the care—or, mor- prop
erly speaking, to the neglect—of his
father.
"Do you sco that man?" said tho su
perintendent of the yreat Brookville
glass works, which Northern capital had
lately planted in Brookville County, Al
abama, "do you see that man?"—he was
pointing out Jo's father. "Well you
will never see him doing any move than
he is now. Nobody ever saw him work,
lie eats, drinks, c'othes himself, has a
roof over his head, . not a cent in his
pocket. Now, low uoes lie do it? And
there arc a dozei. like him about here.
I tell you, the mysteries of Pans are
nothing to 'he mysteries of Brookvillo."
And as we never permit our 's
to dwell on a subject without hearing
from it agaiu within twenty-four hours,
that same day the superintendent re
ceived a* letter from Jo.
The spelling was dubious and the
handwriting shaky, but there was noth
in' ,dubious or shaky in the spirit of the
cc /iposition.
''Mister Superintendant: i wud like a Plae
in > or employ. Jo TOLLY.
"P. S.—Taliaferro is to long and quar."
The superintendent laughed as he
tossed this evident result of anxious labor
in the scrap basket. The next week he
rccived a fac-simiie of that, letter minus
the postscript, to which he accorded a
similar tieatment, but when he oaw those
same straggling characters on an envel
ope in his mail the third week he opened
it with an amused curiosity.
"Mister Snperintendant: I wrot you 2
Letters and hav no ansar. I wod like to bo
iu yor employ but I knnt wait I mus git a
job. Pleuse'sir ansar and oblig.
Jo TOI.LY."
The superintendent's hand with the
paper in it hovered over the scrap basket.
Then he drew it back. At his call a
weak kneed young man came in from the
outer office.
"Have you room for another boy out
there?" the superintendent asked. "You
have. Well, then, write to this appli
cant and tell him he may come on trial."
For the first few weeks Jo Tolly was
like a new born puppy out in the world
with his eyes shut.
"You must look about you, Tolly,"
said the head clerk. "Now, I started
out with no money, no education, no
bucking, and here 1 am, all by keeping
my eyes peeled."
The clerk with the weak knees struck
in:
"Look at me," fcc said. "I've been a
sober, honest, industrious, God-fearing
man fot fifteen years, and not a cent to
show for it."
Jo turned his long, ruddy face and big,
innocent blue eyes from one to the other
and said nothing. lie rarely talked, and
when he did, it was with a deliberate
slowness which barely escaped a drawl.
But he pondered all that he heard in
his heart, apparently; for gradually his
puppydom fell from him and he became
a satisfactory fixture in the office.
The Brookville Glass Works were a
close corporation. They had bought up
two thousand acres about the site se
lected for their works. Their laborers
dwelt in their cottages built on their
LAPORTE, PA., FRIDAY, OCTOBER 9, 1891.
land; they bou„\jt from the company
store, and lived under laws of their di
rectors' making.
But there was a Naboth's vineyard in
tho centre of tho settUment.
The trouble was that old Colonel Jay
respected his ancestors, and refused to
listen to ony proposition regarding their
sale; for the "vineyard" was a family
burying-ground this time.
The superintendent vainly represented
to him that the bones should be carefully
removed.
"They are earth to earth by this time,
sir," said Colonel Jay, with statelincss,
"When I sell that ground, sir, I sell
them. So you will not mention it again,
if you please, sir."
After that, the superintei, who
expected a pistol in every Alabama
pocket, did not care to open the subject
again.
"Ain't you ever goiu' to sell, Colonel
Jay?" asked Jo.
110 had paddled across the creek
which separated the glass works from
the old man's house, and was
sitting on his porch with him in the
twilight.
"No, sir. Nor I ain't over going to
accommodate again, neither. I told
those Dixes they might bury their little
babby there, and what did they do?
Laid it right on great-graudaunt 'Liza.
I went aud told them they'd got
to take that babby off. But it
warn't pleasant. I wou't accommodate
again."
"And you ain't ever goin's to sell,
Colonel Jay?"
"Look here, Jo," said the colonel,
testily, "how old are you? Eighteen
years. Well, I guess you remember me
as soon as you remember anything. Did
you ever know me to change my
mind? That ground ain't-ever-to-be
disturbed!"
Joe turned his full blue eyes on the
colonel.
"Jlow about when you die, Colonel
Jay?" he asked in his most deliberate
speech.
The colonel was staggered and
showed it.
"If I were you," Jo went on, now
lookiug over the water, "I'd fix that
while I was able. There's a whole arre
there, and there ain't but one end of it
in graves. I'd sell it all under a deed
that would make the man who bought it
keep the grave end nice and clean, and
the grass cut—and perhaps llowers."
Colonel Jay rose from his chair.
"Boy," he cried, "you're right! Why
didn't I think of that?"
Then his face fell suddenly.
"But who'd be fool enough to buy?"
"I would," answered Jo, stolidly; and
if I don't pay you a hundred dollars for
it in a year's time, you can tako the
ground back and all the improvements on
it."
What the improvement meant, the
whole works soon knew.
"Jo Tolly's store" was the talk of the
place. It was little more than a shanty,
but the laborers soon learned that the
shanty had goods of better quality and
lower prices on its shelves than the com
pany's handsome storehouse had on
theirs.
•'lt ain't very pretty outside, but I
tried to have it good in," said Jo, mod
estly, looking at the well-stocked walls.
"I spent all my money there."
The money referred to was a small
sum which he had gotten by auctioning
oil the worn-otl roof which covered him,
and the bit of land on which he stood.
The rest of the tract had been sold al
most to the very djor step long before.
There had been no one to interfere in
his reinvestment, his father having per
formed the first graceful act in his
worthless life by step'*' 0 out of it at
this opportune time.
"Don't spend it all in shoestrings and
rock candy, Tolly," the superintendent
had said. "Put it in bank and try to
keep adding to your bauk-book. That's
tho way."
"Yes, sir," said Jo, submissively; but
at the same time it was not his way, nor
did he follow it.
At tirst tho Tolly store was only open"
at night,and Jo waited oil the customers
after hours, but as the business grew a
small boy kept store by day and was as
sistant to the proprietor at night.
"I shouldn't think you'd dare, Jo; I
shouldn't, indeed," said the weak-kueed
clerk, who came to inspect his enterprise
by stealth and after nightfall. "Why, I
wouldn't oven like the chief to see mo
come in here. And how can you sleep
right next to those graves?"
"I like them," said Jo, showing the
first sign of interest. "I'm getting real
fond of them. I like Aunt 'Liza, and I
feel like I knew Aunt Jane.
" 'Dear friends, rapont; ur> more delay,
For deatli will eotne to tako no nay;
Be always ready, night and (lay,
1 suddenly was suatcUe I away.'
I feci just like she was saying it to me
every time I read it."
The head clerk—he of the "peeled
eyes"—also paid Jo a visit; but lie came
in by broad daylight and examined
everything.
lie laughed a good deal, and looked
at Jo's placid face curiously.
"You're bucking against a big con
cern, boy," he said. "I tell you you'll
have to work like au ox and kick like a
steer."
Jo, smiling his usual rather stupid,
slow smile, listened to each one and said
nothing.
As yet the superintsodent had said
nothing either, but that came.
| One day, as Jo was passing through
j his office, he stopped him.
"Tolly," he said, carelessly, "how
much do you hold your land at?"
"What do you think it's worth sir,"
inquired Jo, respectfully.
"Not much."
"I've got my store built and paid for
out of it," Jo went on, as though calcu
lating aloud. "I've paid for my land,
the business is growing, and "
"You take a week to think it over in,"
said the superintendent, hastily.
On that day week Jo entered the
superintendent's office and stood before
his desk.
"Well, Tolly," said the superintennd
ent, "what is it?"
"It's ten thousand dollars," said Jo.
When the superintendent had a little
recovered he knew that he was a very
angry man, and at the saino
time that it behooved him to walk
carefully.
"The directors couldn't consider such
a price," he said. "It wouldn't be
worth it to them."
"No, sir," said Jo, meekly. "I
know it ain't worth much to anybody
but me."
Then it was that the superintendent
gave Jo very clearly to understand that
he considered him infringing ou the
rights of the company in whose service
he was.
The boy looked so puzzled that he
melted somewhat.
"You don't understand me."
"No, sir," said Jo. "I thought I
owned the land."
"So you do," said the superintendent,
reasßuriugly, feeling now on sure ground;
"but not for all purposes."
"I thought I could put a saloon on it
if I wanted to," said Jo, in a depressed
voice.
The superintendent's hair almost stood
on end.
A grog-shop in the mid-it of his
works? lie could hardly conceal his
dismay.
"Tolly," he said sternly, "you must
choose between tho office and your
shop. No man can serve two mas
ters."
"Yes, sir. You are very kind, sir,"
said Jo, looking gratefully at hiui. "I
was thinking my clerk wasn't doing as
well as he might if I hud my eye more
on him."
"And I assure you, gontleinen," said
the superintendent, reporting to.the
board of directors, "when that boy left
my office I did not whether it was as a
fool or as haviug made a fool of me."
"Call the lad in," suggested one of
the directors. "Let us see if we can
make anything of him."
Jo came in at -once on being sum
moned. lie did not even tarry to take
oil the apron which he wore in his shop,
or to brush the Hour from his coat.
These adjuncts helped to heighten the
ruddy iunocence of his appearance as he
entered. lie faced the curious eyes of
the waiting board with a disarming
guilelessness.
"Did you want me, sii," he asked of
the superintendent, and the slow motion
of his lips was almost foolish.
But had those lips only been formed
to say "ten thousand" they could not
have repeated it more persistently wlieu
the question of barter was opened. His
slow-moving blue eyes looked with open,
childish appeal into the assembled laces.
"I do think it's worth that to me, sir,
don't you?" he asked of the most urgent
speaker; and that gentleman suddenly
collapsed.
There was one director who took no
part in the controversy. 110 sat iu his
chair rubbing his hands together and
watching the scene from his keen, deep
set eyes. Every now and then his sparo
frame was shaken with silent laughter.
As the door closed on Jo's retreating
figure he gave way to spasms of alternate
laughter aud coughing.
"Oh, dear, dear!" he chuckled, wip
ing his eyes, "to have that fool look on
the outside of his head and all that horse
sense ou the inside!''
"Then, sir, you think him playing a
game, do you?" asked the superintend
ent.
"Playing? He's played it! Hasn't
he caught us in just the trap he started
out to?"
The old man went oil iu another par
oxysm of laughter.
"What did you say the lad's name
was,"he gasped as he recovered.
"Jo Tolly," answered the disgusted
superintendent, "or, rather, that's what
he calls himself. His real name is T-a-1-
i-a-f-e-r-r-o."
"Taliaferro—Joseph Taliaferro What
was his father's name?"
"Joseph, also, I believe."
"It's him. As sure ns my name is
Snyder B. Simes it's him!" cried the old
man, rising to his feet excitedly.
"Where's he gone? Where's he gone?"
He rushed from tho room, his thin
legs wavering under him, followed by
the bewildered superintendent. When
they returned, Jo Tolly, divested of the
flour and apron now, was with them.
"Gentlemen," said Mr. Snyder B.
Simes, "allow me to preseut my grand
son to you, formerly of the firm of 'Jo
Tolly,' now full-fledged partner of the
lumber firm of 'Snyder B. Simes &
Grandson.' Tho Tolly store is closed,
gentlemen. We—that is, my partner—
has decided that it is more advantageous
for our present business to be on agreea
ble terms with this Brookville Glass
Works Company."
Here Mr. Simes, shaking with laugh
ter, broke down again.
"Oh, boys, ain't he a chip of the old
block?" he cried.— Frank /^tlic's.
Dublin lias the largest brewery.
Terms —$1.25 in Advance; 51.50 after Three Months
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.
A Troy (N. Y.) electric car cost
SIO,OOO.
Water power runs the Dover (N. H.)
electric plant.
Harvard College is having constructed
tho largest and finest photographic tele
scope in the world.
The electric light plant at tho palace
of Vieuna is to be extended so as to
make a total of 4000 incandescent lamps.
A resident of Evart, Mich., has in
vented a device whereby brakes applied
to a locomotive will operate eveiy brake
an the train.
A new Swedish glass is claimed to
have important advantages for microcopo
and other fine lenses, giving greatly in
creased power.
A chair propelled by electricity from a
storago battery placed beneath the seat
is the latest luxury for the invalid. One
charging will last forfifty milesof travel.
The telephone between Paris aud Lon
don having been so successful it is pro
posed to connect Brussels and London.
For that purpose a cable will be laid
between Ostend and Dover.
A Frenchman has invented an im
proved method of telegraphing so that it
is practicable to transmit 150 words per
minute on a single wire. The meseage
when delivered from the machine is type
written.
Artificial grindstones, which outwear
by years any natural stone known, arc
oiade of a mixture of pulverized quartz,
powdered flint, powdered emery or co
rundum and rubber dissolved by a suit
jble solvent.
Owing to the rapid destruction of tho
pinions, the running of armatures at 100 C
or more revolutions per minute is being
done away with. Slow speed motor*,
with a normal speed of 400, are now
:ousiderod the best practice.
The longest shaft in the world in one
piece, or in any number of pieces, is in
the Washington Navy Yard, Washing
ton, District of Columbia. It is J?J
inches square, 460 feet long, and trans
mits power to traveling cranes. It runs
&t 160 revolutions per minute.
It has been estimated that one ton of
;oal gives enough amuionia to furnish
ibout thirty pounds of crude sulphate,
the present value of which is about £l2
per ton, and there being 10,000,000 tons
A coal annually distilled for -jus, no less
than 133,929 tons of sulphate, ot the
money value of $1,607,148, are pro
duced.
The question why a piece of solid iron
floats ou molten iron has been satisfacto
rily answered by Dr. Anderson and Mr.
Wrightson. The cold metal is reallj
heavier than the molten, and when first
placed in the latter it sinks by virtue of
its weight; but growing warmer it ex
pands, and thereby becoming specifically
lighter it rises to the surface. After a
time, however, it again shrinks and
melts into the fluid mass around it.
Some of the most prominent irot
founders are introducing a new and sim
ple practice in order to secure strongei
castings, the method in question consist
ing in placing thin sheets of wrought
iron in the ceuter of the mold previous tc
the operation of casting. This method
was first resorted to, it appears, in the
casting of thin plates for the ovens ol
cooking stoves, it being found that u
sheet of thin iron in the center of u
quarter-inch oven plate rendered it prac
tically unbreakable by fire.
History of Lighthouses.
The history of the lighthouse goo 1 ,
back to the time when your neighbor
didn't fling things into your back yard.
It is claimed that Virgil had kuowledge
of a lighthouse, and that ho stated that
one was placed ou a tower of the temple
of Apollo, ou Mount Leucas, the light ol
which, visible far out at sea, warned anc
guided mariners. It is even said that
the colossus of lihodes, erected 300 years
before the birth of Christ, showed from
his uplifted hand a signal light. But th<
famous Pharos of Alexandria, built 282
B. C., is the first light of undoubted rec
cord. Other lights were shown fronr.
towers at Ostiu, Ravenua, Apainea, but
the lighthouse at Coruuna, Spain, is be
lieved to be the oldest sea town. This
was built in the reign of Trojan, and iu
1634 was reconstructed. England aud
Frauce have towers built by their Koman
conquerors, which were used as light
houses, and they are to-day marvels it
the art of masonry.— Chicago Herald.
Preserving Iron From Itnst.
The beautiful ironwork so much in
vogue nowadays, is generally finished
ou account of its susceptibility to rust',
with a coating of black lacquer, or so.in
other preparation, which is not only in
appropriate but gives to the metal ati
unnatural appearance. A clever French
man, who was an expert in metal work,
showed us such a simple and effective
way of preserving it from rust, that it is
worth remembering. The only material
required is a cow's horn (the toy truin
pets sold in the shops will a;iswer tlu
purpose), lleat the iron aud rub th(
edge of the horn over it—that is all. II
the horn smokes a little as you rub it oc
ycu will know that the iron is hot
enough. This will cause the horn to
melt, and an imperceptible coating will
be left upon the iron that will atlord
complete protection from the damp for n
year or more on out-door work. On in
door ironwork it will last indefinitely.
New York Tribune.
NO. 52.
THE OOLDBM-BOD. x
There's gold in the miser's cheat
Fast locked with a golden key;
And a gold most rare in a woman's hair
And gold iu the sands at sea:
There's a tawny gold on the wheat's lith«
length /
Where it's breeze-tossed billows nod, J
But never a gold so full and free, .
Ah, me—
None, none like the golden-rc J.
There's gold on the maple's branch
That gleams on an autumn lea.
And a golden crown when the sun dies
down
While the shadows turn and flee;
There's a wealth of gold in the pointed
leaves
Where the willow strews the sod.
But no such feathery filagree, .
Ah, me—
None, none like the golden-rod.
There's gold in the dawn's faint streaks
That glint on the poplar tree,
There's gold in the mine, and in lees of wine,
And gold on the bumble-bee. »
But by the plumes of its knightly crest.
Where the wild wind rides rough-shod,
There is never a gold so fair to see.
Ah, me— •
None, none like the golden-rod.
—Ernest MoOaffey, in Arkansaw Traveler.
HUMOR OF THE DAY. ~
A work of art —Belling a picture.—
Puck.
If life really were a poem, it is doubt
ful if any one would be averso to it.—
Detroit Free Preis.
Belle—"This mirror is simply per
fect." Bess—"Ah, I see. It flatters
you."— Yankee Blade.
The spoon craze pervades the water
ing places. It takes only two to make a
full set.— Boston Herald.
When a firm winds up its business it ia
only reasonable to suppose that it has
been running down.— Detroit Tribune,
Quoricus —"What is Mrs. Moneybag,
ges's position in society?" Cynicus—
"Why, it's capital."— Washington JStar.
Ever since Rebecca went to to the well
watering-places have been great resorts
for ladies with matrimonial aspirations.
Chicago News.
There is no affliction without its com
pensating benefit. The deaf mute is a
stranger to the trials of , the telephone.—
Boston Transcript.
A distinctive feature of this season's
hats for the ladies is an exceptionally
low crown. Not so the price. It is as
high as ever.— Detroit Free Press.
Theatre Manager (to departing specta
tor) —"Bepardon, sir, but there are
two more acts," "Yes, I know it.
That's why I'm g >ing."— Flieqewle Blaet
-1 ter.
"The Eastern sages believe that there
is n sign on each man's forehead that the
i angels may read," he whispered softly.
''What is yours?" she answered. "To
let?"— New York Herald.
Philanthropist " You say youi
brother treated you with marked disre
spect? Iu what way?" Tramp (wiping
his eyes)—" Went to work in my pres
ence."—New York Herald.
At supper the other evening Feble
witterather brusquely bade the table gill
give him some sauce. He got what ho
asked for, but, somehow, did not seetn
to relish it .—Detroit Free Press.
"I say, waiter," exclaimed an impa
tient customer, "I've been here a full
hour!" "I've been here since seven this
morning," answered the waiter. "Tire
some, ain't it?"— Philadelphia Record.
The Maiden—"l hope you noticed,
Mr. Rimer, that it was your book that 1
brought out here to read." Mr. Rimei
—"Yes. I also noticed that you fell
fast asleep over it."— Munsey's Weekly.
"We have no use for bear stories,"
said the editor. "Our readers demand
something spicy." "Well," said the
man wit'i the manuscript, "this story is
about a cinu.imon bear."— -Indianapolis
Journal.
"You couldn't get steaks as rare as you
liked them at your late boarding house,
eh?" said the old boarder to the new.
"Well, it'll be rare enough you'll get
them here, let me tell you!"— Detroit
Free Press.
"Great Scott!" exclaimed the world
the other day as she wiped the perspira
tion off the North American Continent
with a point lace cloud. "Did any one
ever have so much trouble with a suu
before?"— Lift.
One occasionally reads of the discov
ery of the petrified remains of human br
ings. Is this to be taken as indicating
that there may have been those in days of
yoro who succeeded in rvakmg them
selves solid?— Detroit Free Press.
A Jefferson avenue young man who has
moucy enough to do t1... summer resorts
and conscience enough to flirt with every
girl he meets, went iuto a Woodward ave
nue jewolry store last week where bo
knew one ot the clerks. ' I want three
rings, lady's size," he said. "Ah,"
smiled the clerk, cunuingly, "going to
have a cii*u >s, are you?"— Detroit Free
Press.
"How are you getting on with the
piano?" asked Alphonso of his best be
loved Matilda. "Oh, very well; I can
see the great progress in my work."
"How is that?" "Well, the family that
lived next door moved away within a
week after I began to practice. The next
people stayed a month, the next ten weeks
and the family there now have remained
nearly six months."— Yankee Blade.