61jt zags eon* agitator Is published over Wednesday Moorning nl.s2 per year, invariably in advance. COBB & VAN GELDER. cuuu.j .14. • aoleaive) yt..e.A.rz -Es 41:/ED or MII , IIIIII, Olt LEBB,BAXE ciNE SQUAIIE SA'rs. 11u. 3110 e. 0 610 a. IYr r $l,OO $2,00 $2,50 $5,00 $7,00 $12,00 Sqlf,ires 2,00 9,00 4,00 8,00 12.00 18,00 ml l ...„. 10,001 16,00, 17,00, 22,00, 30,30 - 1 50,00 08,,0,1.-_ -- 18,00' 20.001 30,001 40,001 C 9,001 90,00 ,Srecial Notices 15 cents per line; Editorial or Local 20 cents per line, masorna. ~SE A LOBO E, No.:117, A, 1. M., meet, at thuir Halt er Dr. Ray's drug store, ou Trzosdar craning, Oft or before tho Pnll Moon, at 7 o'clock I'. 1 - 4)11A CHAPTER, No. 194, R.. 1. M.—met/14 /I t the . HAIL on Thursday evening, on or botoro tho hull Noon, at 7 o'clock P. M. ry.kl t 00UN011.,, Nu. 32, R.. 1. S. MASTERS, meets at (ha 11n11, on the third FrHay - of oath calendar month, at 7 o'clock P. M.— rt A 1; AG !HON COMMANDERY, No. 23, of KNIGHTS WI PLA R, and the appendant oracra, meets at line 11111, on the brat Friday of each calendar month, at 7 o'clock P. M. ~ BUSINESS DIRECTORY, IVILif4AIII ATTORNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW li,urance, f lieduty and Pension - Agency, Main street Wellsbiwo, Pa., Jan. 1,1868. WM,-GARBETSON, IoaNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW, Notary Publics and Insurance Agent, Bless harg, Pa., over CaldwoWs Store. GEO. W. ME.RRICK, ATTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR, AT LAW- Wilco with W. 11. Smith, Esq., Main &rem, c ppo.ito Union Block, Wellnboro, July 15, 1608. M.l". D. TERISELL tlic, CO., dOLESALE DHUIWISTS, and dealers in Wall Paper, Kerosene Lamps, Window Glass, Perfumery, Paints and Oils, 1 - ..'erniag, N. Y., Jan. 1, 186S.—ly. s. F. WILSON. J. B. NitEs. i WILSON & BALES, ,ITORNEYS dr. COUNSELORS AT LAW; First door from Bigoney's, on the Avenuie)— Will attend to business entrusted to their care is the counties of Tioga and Potter. Welisboro, Jon. 1, IS6B. JOHN L nivrcapLL i TORNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW, it W ‘ dliboro, Tioga Co., Pa. • ',Nita Agent, Notary Public, and Irtauratico Agent. lie will attend promptly ,to c ()Diction of Punstons, Back Pay and Dotrty. * Notary l'uldle he takes acknowledgements of deedd, ad ortbs, and will net as Couit:lioner to t.ll:e tezttniony. 2 7,11-01 lice over Itoy's rug Store, ~ijoining Agitator Offico.—Oct. 30. 1367 John Vior- GuornsoV, ifttftNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW. .13 , .in,,.returned to this county with a view of taking it hi, pertuteut rerrideuee, olicite n •!tre of public pat °neg . °. All busine k y tra,ted to his care will ho at ended to with rumptuels and fidelity. Office 2d door south d 2. S. Parr's hotel. Tioga, Tioga. Co., Pa. -out. 26.'66.—tf. .1011 N SHAIiSPE A ICE, t;.\ Elt AND TAILOR. Shop over John 11. lc , oren's Store. ..,:rAT• Cutting, Fitting. ot. LIE, Totga County, , J. I;. Iktitt, ot4 Kim . colt% L-hielit to tlio best 2.1,,upi1 ? 1•,%,t Co. FIA, rl ics ith (fob% ey :ince; (loud entot woof tot 1 / 1 .11. Witt !Me U , VICOI-11. /1111.li 19 Ltte , l up the 14a Pow,. 1 1 . Jry htuldwd, tivAt ihe I;mtrery, Wt511:1,oro, i„•1 pi,p.",,d i.. tutu ~n t -hue 0911 , ll', tt.,ti S- ill 'lie 1,1,1 11i4111- Ittr tAtitle./ ..it lor AI A. 10 Well,liorh, (Jet. 14, lags, MINER IN:ATI:INS, PnorinE'Not 411AV1.1NCI 1ith,1111... , !WV , lo , tel I.titlauw on ILosttd of 011 I'mon lat. ly dt•••tro3rll. It} l a m now t . ....tt1y 1.. I ;vt• and entert+tin v. 'rho U li j o i t Hotel 1%,t, ji l t. Ivied tot a Teritrocati,t• mid LII Propt vos ti call be ~g.. :ttt etit I% r lito , tl,lr ILI tenthtiry GROCERY AND RESTAURANT One door above thu Aleat. Market, WELLSBORO, PENN'A, REsPEcTFuLLV announces to thu trailing public that he has a do-it Ode stock of ro certe,, comprising, I'4:cis, Coaces, Spiee:2, Sugars, Molas,es,Syritp:4, :ofd all that con,titutes a iirfl clo,s 'stock. Oy:rntel :in, (ivory ,tyle at all sea 'soil:lloc hours. Welkboro,,la.n. 2, 1867-tf. lARDWA.RE, IRON, STEEL, NAILS STO VA'S, TI A WARE, BELTING, SiltS, CiITbERY J. JOIINSoN Carriage and klaraess Trimmings A IIN ESSES, SADDLES. &.c. Corniti2.. N. y., Jan. '2, 1.6.67-13' HEAR 1" - E ! BEAR YE! HEAR de r W. 'l'. AIATHERS, at hi, :.,1::)r;3, 2d door above Roy'e Doildinp 11',11-droro, (June 10, w;s,) • rril h ItotT.ll.) Scales, nil ordinary .119 ti 7 e4, /"r heaVY. ail , ' Cent] ter u: e, May be 1- "l ' in , / at the li.tr.in:.te Store M' Wm. Itoberte, WOitlmro. The-0 S,a les aro the Fairbanka pat ent'imd have no roperior allyttiterc. They tiro made in the Itet.t style and have'talcon the premi um nil the groat exhibitions. Proplietor Iha the • elo ntirgry fer these Senles in th teghm. W I LLI A M RoIsERTS. 1111 M 33t113. 3 3-cribt.r 13 3= foltql lip 1130 room,: ail " j,it l ing I). itgliovt I • Tut :I; 1 :"Zrove Store Gtr the 111 toohet tit e , put .sly nl [Vac!, and Conti)! (1 SIR)/17.V0 TOM! )„ifi c hi : „ l „ line Cr pu;r; THBA (fen, PIPES, and therito yl I,IILE 11UN I'L.I,S FEE —IV.. I.arrhy certify 14 that Li4il toiinufrietoreil k.Y ( :, I ):thiliney miner. ai their Ell: I;:lines t, klll hip. and cce 11010 re. It to lie e A l lial if fillt Q Uilbrihr t.) t he e•iyu r ,,a rlnFter. David Satilb S M Con,.lde A P Cone %I II Cobb If E Simmons .1 Earnanur ti W 11. - trltei A:a t: - zwith I.: Scrait. S 11 D.tvi Albert King John C :Miller .1 11 Watrout. Wll Watron.i_ L L Nfarbh 11' :11 Smith 0 A Smith 11 :11 Foote .1 1) Stiait. P C Van Udder .1 J smith Jared Davis J F Zimmerman C L King 1, L Steitb. N.l3.—Plastor always on hand at tho Mill.— Prioe $5 per ton. Nov. 4, 1868. • ~+ „ nit . 7 • • - „ (t),11 ttk\oL, 13r • •, :1 , ELAVIIRA, N. Y. BLANK BOOKS ALL KINDS OF GILT WORK COMPLETE YOUR SETS! BILL 11.EA.D PAPER, Pens, Pencils, A::c. I am t!ule agent for C. E. REILLEY L'. S. Perkins, M. D Smith's 'Hotel %. 1:%.1 KEYSTONE 110 TEL. NEW , 7:lii»e'rg UNION HOTEL E. H. KIMBALL„ W.A.LIEEIt &. LATnnop, EIETDIECIEI \V .1 rry, P. LIME, 1 , : Icut,TuitAi, INIPLEMENTS, BARE(CLS, FIRKINS, CHURNS BUTTER 'PUBS, &c., Kept constant]) on Land, abd furnish t (1 to 01 .S'ca ! Sal! Scales ! Wollqlmro, Fel). 12, lt' New Tobacco Store ! 011E11'1;6_,', and all Lind: (;( .set- F r ytnirzwlvt• . .1(11EN W. PCII.4;:l NT..v. 11, 1:-Cc.--11. TO I:,\ 111EllS ! 712000' ,torttte,. WE TWO; = It's we two, it's we two, it's wo two fur ace, All tho world and ice t wo, and Heaven bp our stay. Like a invert:wk in tho lift, sing, 0 bonny bride ! All tho world was Adam onee, Irith }.co by Ilk bide. i t • 1i hat 's the my lass, my love—what can do? - I am thine, aMI thou art Mine, life is sweet and new. It the wurld zuktiell the mark, let it stand by, Fur Wu trio have gotten lease, and once more we'll try. Like a laverock in the lift, sing, 0 bonny brittol It's Ire two, it's Ivo two, happy ,sitln by side. Take n kiss from mo thy man ; now the, ong4o- gins, • All 18 made afresh for mill the in avo liettrt u When ll.e darker days °eine, and Lo :Tin will • Thou shalt dry my tears, lass, ilhd I'll dry thine. It Ave tv,7o, twn, 'While the world's away, Sitting by the golden ::bearcs on our wedding day. "Alioerlidnititto trading. FROM THE OVERLAND MONTHLY. BURIED ALIVE IN THE SEA. In the year 18-IQ, I was serving as a midshipman on board the United States ;frigate: St. L4wrence, then cruising in in the Pacific. The St. Lawrence ear- Hatt crew of six hundred men—Amer icans, Irishmen- and men belonging to every nationality under the sun. The majority of them had paSsed the `best days of (heir lives in the service, and were imbued with all the superstitions so common to their calling, thirty years ago. It was often my fortune to hear wierd yarns of the sea told by men who believed every. •Ivord of them, to comrades Wholicareety-"dared to move „while they listened. Some of the older sailors could, in dark, stormy nights, make the hair of a whole watch, inclu ding their Own, stand on end—with The tales Of seas that gave up Hadr dead, and of the ships that were haunted. On one of these occasions Larry Mc Illather,•Captai u of thefurecastle,spoke ti - tbi lows, " When 1 sailed on the 1-3abine, she was haunted, an' this is the way it hap pened. Ye see, it was a dark, stor my night just like this, an' the men were sent OHL to furl the Ilyiuf jih. The captain of the forecastle was stowin' the head or the sail, and :111 of a sudden lie said to the man next to him 'lt, blow:; hard, J:u•1: ;' an' t.he►► cut his throat a►►' tell overboat d ato.. was lost. Ever after that, of a dark,storiny night, when the men went out to furl the tly imf jib they would see a man on on tilt• end of the boom, an' he would say : 'lt blows hard Jack ;' an' cut his throat an' fall overboard." .1 ii t as Larry linislied, a voice which seemed 'to proceed out of the air over head, rernarkud : ` 4 .1 - t blows hard Jack." 4 , 2/ iustan6 t110:43 who INVerO ooL ightened too omento move Worn on heir feet, and holding on the rigging to eep their tottering legs from letting hem down. "Ind ye hear that, Harry Elower'' Ale Blather, as soon as he had re ,overed hina enough to speak." " Yes, I heerd, it," replied Harry ; and like all ye other bloody ghosts, it «a~ti't a I.!,host, but a parrot that :add it." an the Ilying-jib:downhaul, clear away the halliards—haul down Lay out, a nd furl the dying-pi!" These orders were issued by the ollicer of the leek ; but there was hesitation dis played by all whose duty it was to obey them. In the meantime Mc Blather turned to Blower and said : "Now, :Harry, I believe in ghosts—you don't. I hasn't the pluck to lend Cho• men out on the Ilyingjib-hoom ; 1 would be sure to see a man on the end (lit. You have the pluck, an' you wouldn't see a man ; therefore, Harry, will yez do me the favor to lead the men ont.?" Harry Blower refilied : "Larry, you're all jdiot, a fool, 'Mid an ass. And ghost or no ghost, I don't lay out on the ily -ingjih-boom ttAnight." Come! Lay out there, you lubbers, and furl the flying jib. What are you about?" came from the quarter-decli in a voice that smacked of a eat-oh-lithe tails and a (lozen on the bare back. I n an instantlhe luhbers were scramb ling out, led by Me Blather. " Do you hear.anything, Larry ?" in quired Terence Malone, who was the next-man on the-inside, "No, Mart ye," replied Larry "and if you near anything, 'don't let on ye hear it. Don't tell me ye hear it; and I warn you not to show me anything ye see.? The sail was furled in short. order; and the men "laid in," each one trying to get ahead of the other. In a little while the watch Avaq scat tered about the decks—some to sleep, s4rne to discuss the events of the even,ing, or any other subject which happened to interest them. " I say Jack," remarked Terence Ma lone,'"they ought to git Simon Gobble out of f he ship. He's been a pirate an' a murderer, an' the devil knows what. He swings close to me, you know ; an' the other night jilt as I was fallen into a doze, I felt something ketch me by the arm. I sprung up in my hammock, an' there was Simon Gobble asittin' up in his, and he wag asayin': 'Leave inc ; why do ye hunt me? Leave me 1 say.' And his eyes were closed ; and his ugly ould face looked so White, I. thought it was dead. .1 tell ye, Jack, I 'Over was frightted so bad in all me life, as I was th n an' it didn't take me long to turn °hi Inv me hammock. You may he suile, - i slept on a soft plank the rest or the 'night, an' been a (loin) try it ever• since. I wouldn't sleep along side that man tight for all the gold uv Peru. Did ever you. see SHIM IL aW fn I cold, bliarky eye as be's got? An' • then his face is just like the face uv one or the divils f used to see when 1 had the hor rors. Mark nie, .laek, if iver this ship conies to grief, it will he through Simon iziobbl6." " Poor fellow," replied Jack - , "1 pity ;:toineihnes he never speaks any one, and no one ever speaks to In all the' ship there is not one ma 1w can call his friend—and yet no one does his duty bettor. But then he has sue strange ways about hint; and there t - hardly a man in the ship that he- has not frightened out of his wits. We ought to try to be more friendly." " Friendly 7 is it Friendly you inane. Bad luck to (din ; he'd better never try to be friendly me," "'That's what the men all say, ark it's not fair; they should give the ma a chance." ne don't, deserve a chance; a' I tell ye, Jack, be has done pomething awful. f the dead Oath] speak, they would tell us terrible stories about Simon Gobble. Jist before you joined the ship we were caught in a hurricane.. All hands were called to reef top-sails. I was on the maintop-sail S 7 ard, , and Gobble was at the weather earing. Well, all at once there was a long flash of red lightning, Gobble save a yell that made ev'rybody rtaTh© gitatioia of 10.13.icraa.glit is , 3130g1.,33.3a,tiag-' of ; Viiiiiiscicorn..Yr WELLSBORO, PA., JULY 28, 1869. turn pale. The men on deck an, _ the men on the yard looked, an' there! on the yard=arm, - right. behind Gobble, was.anum with Irts,thrpat cut frcim ear. to ear, the blood streaming down his breast. Terence Matonejneversaw such a bloody set of Irishmen as there is on board this ship. When I first joined her, I was not afraid of the 'Old Harry' himself; but now I don't care to go about in the dark, uul* some one is•witji,me. 'Every time Igo aloft in the iilght, • l don't dare to look around me for fear of -. seeing a ghost. • For all that though, ,Tereneo, I never believed in ghosts; and don't believe in them now. But I've got the - panics, and so I Atll just as much afraid as anybody." .About this time the other watch was called. Terence turned in on his soft plank,. and his faiendjack turned into his hammock—both to pleasant dreams; it is to be hoped. In a few days the St; Lawrence;arrived at Tahiti, where she was visited by a large number of ladies and gentlemen, principally missionaries andlheir faniilieS. One day a betuiti ful little girl weekending on the edge of an empty chest, and leaning over the iron rail around the poop leek, watch ing a.sehool of sharks that were hang ing around, the , - ship. Suddenly, the eh feet 'slipped' frord under her,and, td the horror of all, she rolled overboard. In an instant Simon Gobble, who had been seizing a ratline in the mizzen rigging; threw overboard the chest and •ind then leaped after it., fairly alight-t ing among the sharks. With one arm and a long, sharp knife he kept off the sharks, while with the other he placed the child in the empty chest, where no 'sharks could harm her. He now -I;ave all 103 attention to the hungry monsters thst everywhere surrounded him, and to the surprise of every one was picked up by a boat which was sent to his assis tance, with only two slight woundS— one ht the side ono in the arm. He wished to place the little girl ho had saved so gallantly in her mother's arms himself, but nothing could induce the child to go , near him, and sib would shrink away with a frightened look if lie attempted to approach her. This was a terrible blow to poor Gobble, and he said : "I.might as well be dead, as living anti where I am. There is a curse upon are, and I have never Acme anything to deserve a curse. It is too hard-;--too hard P' From the lumen t he saved the little girl, Simon Gobble was a hero in the estimation of the officers; hut the men ascribed his success to 'the interposition of the devil, and from that time believed him to be in regular t communication with the,eviL one. They dreaded him, if anything more than ever, and Simon (Tiohide was as - mnein alone on the crow ded decks of the St. Lawrence as he would have teen in the midst of the Desert, of Sahara. In a week we sailed from Valparaiso, and feinr dap alte wants were struggling for existence in tine track.of a hurricane. One night Siinon Gobble and Terence 111alonc were stationed at the life buoys. 1 was midshipman of the quarter-deck, and Terrence came to me and said "If Simon (ioblde is to remain at one of the life buoys, sir, I respectfully ax to be relieved. I haven't the, pluck to stay, sir." I relieved Gobble and sent all(?thell . 11) . 1111 . .1n his place., Shortly afterward% walked for to speak to the ut•ticc-. -e • there T heard a veritable sob. , The sub came from the tiehing heart of Simon Gobble, I told to cheer up, and asked him to come aft and have a talk ,with me. lle replied that he "felt too had to talk with anybody, but that sonic other time he would like to tell me his history," Poor fellow, the next morning he was found black and dead in his hammock. The ship was rolling and pitching at such a terrible rate, that it was impossible for the ,surgeon to examine into the cause of his death ; but he determined to wait a little while in hopes that the hurricane might abote. Night came on, but there was Ito change for 'the better. It was served that the body of Gobble was turning white rapidly hut this (lid not excite any partiticular comment at the [ time, ------ . land." That banner is the emblem of The order Was given to prepare the freedom and liberty, and whenever it body ftir Initial, and it was immediately floats, there •we are equally protected, sewed tip in a hammock with a sixty and there we are safe from injury and four pound hots at its feet. It was then d placed between a couple of gunk, where insult, and shoul any dastard hand it was intended to let it remain ntil dare to molest or trample upon the righs and of ay erson daylight. The The men seemed to•be gath ever t •humble, liberties claimin n its p protection; erect in groups all over the ship, and to how suddenly our entire government be d iscussi ng some obj eet very earnestly. demands a reparation of the injury and One of the officers happened to overhear indemnity for the future, and if denied, them, and the impression left upon his the war power is brought into requisi mind was, that they would rather go . tide to compel a restitution. Then down with the ship than go aloft with cherish that-noble emblem ; swear _up the body•of Gobble on board. This wO,, on your family altars, that IL shall float quietly reported to the Captain, and he in honor above you, dr torn and in gave orders to bury' the corpse without shreds, it shall be your I winding sheet delay. - in its defence. , It was tine o'clock at night ml, As individual members of society, pitchy dark. The wind howled and there are three duties we owe, one to shrieked through the rigging, and I, our Clad, one to our country, and one to never wished to hear it again. Occa- ourselves. .Of the first, l i t, is unneces sionally a deafening crash of thunder eary for me to speak, as better and abler would burst upon our ears, or a flash of men teach you from the pulpit, and lightning would illuminate the sea for their exemplary lives, how you are to miles arottntl. The gallant old ship in perform that duty, and to them, I will her struggles with the waves pitched lugly submit the first and greatest sub and rolled until every timber moaned ;,:peet that should agitate the public mind, and quivered. in the midst of allevery but of the others, it is proper and lit one was startled by the order All hands tins that, upon this occasion and at bury the dead P' passed by the boat- this time, we should mingle our senti swain in a full, clear voice. Then his melds and counsel together. • mates'stationed about tile ship, one by To our country we owe obedience, m oue, took up the order, and repeated: Tea , and suport, obedience to its laws "All hands bury the dead 1" sad institutions, respect to the rulers, The corpse was catrried np the gang- 14.winakers and executors of all its va way and placed on a plank ready for Otis branches and support; to defend launching. The men huddled together aptinst all opposers and factions who fotward of thegangwa,y, and the officers Mould seek to disrupt or deFitroy it. assembled just abaft it. When every- lit was said by the ancient Romans, thing was ready, the chaplain corn- tlat ingratitude and treasen • to one's meneed to read the burial service, but country were thegreatest climes known ocbasionally thunder would be so loud to their law, and punished with the and long continued that he would have utmost vigor. The principle to a great to stop and wait until it was over, be- extent is applicable to our own times, fore he.could he heard. Then again a and can not be too strictly observed.— lurid flash oflightning would blind hint Here all are equal and all may be ani so completely, that he could not see to mated by the same spirit of ambition, read until after the effect of the light- no hereditary titles pass from genera fling had passed away. At such times .tion to generation, and no titled atistoc the eyes•of all were so strangely affected racy controls the destinies of.this free that everything assumed a weired, un- !republic, and the farmer's boy, now natural shape. The faces of the ship's lilodding along in your District school people looked like faces of the going o hir, for I know all about the di ICI - mit countries, and could t-x plain them all to you," remark et] Tom 'l'llund). 'l'hat would be very nive,' maid La vinia. ' Do you think so?' said the (4- eneral , =M=MENETI=II 'Of mur?e,' replied Lavinia, coolly, fur I, tieing a stranger to all the habits and etoltonis of the people, as well as to the COl.lll tl' i y ii hi he pleasant to have sonielierz , on along - ,%vho could an swer an foolish questions.' •t ~h,,e111 like it 14.4 rate, if Mr.liar num ivould engage me,' said th e Gen_ ' I - thought you remarked the other day that you had money enough, and was tired ot• traveling,' said Lavinia, with a slightly mischievous look from one corner of her eye. 'chat depends upon my company while traveling,' replied the General. You might not liud my compap r y very agreeable.' I would be glad to risk It.' Thopropriotorahavostockedtboostabliiihrao with a now a vario assortment of JOB AND CARD TYPE and aro prepared to execute neatly and promptly POSTERS, HANDBILLS, CIRCULARS, BILL HEADS, CARDS, PAMPHLETS, Sco., ho. Deeds, Mortgage s, Leases, and a full assortment of Constables' and Justfces' Blanks on hand. People living at•a distance can dependon hav ing their work dono promptly and sent back b; return maid. NO. 30. ` Well, perhaps Mr. Barnum would engage you if you askect-•him,' said Lavinia. Would you really t like to have me ge?' asked the General, quietly Insin uating his arm around her waist, but hardly close enough to touch her. Of course I would,' was the reply. The little General's IlltEla clasped the: waist closer as he turnetthis face nearer to hers, and said : Don't you think it would be pleas anter if we went as man and wife?' The little fairy quickly disengaged his arm, and remarked that the Gener al was a funny fellow to joke in that way. • am not joking at all,' said the General, earnestly, it ,is quite. too serious a matter for that.'' ' I wonder why the Commodore don't come?' said Lavinia. I hope' you are not - anxious for his arrival, kir lam sure lam net,' re sponded the General, and what is more, I hope you will say 'yes,' lidera he comes at all!' ' Really, Mr. Stratton,' said Lavinia, with. dignity, if you are in earnest in. your strange proposal, I must say I am: surprised.' ;` Well, I hope you are not offended,' replied the General s for I was never more earnest in my life, and I hope you will consent. The first moment. I saw you I felt that you were created to be my wife.' But this is so sudden.' Not so very ° sudden, it is several mouths since we first met, and you know all about me and,my family, and I hope you find nothing to object to in me? JOBBING IMPARTZENT. AND FAST PRESSES, Not at all; on the contrary I have found you very agreeable, in fact I like you very much as a friend, but I have not thought of marrying; - and—' And what? my dear,' said the General, giving her a kiss. 'Now I beg of you, don't have any 'buts' or 'ands about it. You say you like me as a friend, why will •you not like me as a husband'? You ought to get married; I love you dearly, and I want you for a wife, Now deary the Commodore will he hero in a few minutes—l may not have'a chance to see you again alone— do say that we will be married, and I will get# Mr. Barnum to give up your engagement.' Lavinia hesitated, and finally said ' I think I love you well enough 'to consent, but I have always said I would never marry with Out my mother's con sent.' Ohl I'll ask your mother. May I ask your mother? Come, say .'yes to that, and I will do that, pet?' Then there was a sound of something very much like the popping the several corks from as many beer bottles. The young eves-droppers had no doubt as to the, character of these reports, nor did they doubt that they sealed the betroth al, for immediately after they heard Lavinia say': ' 'Yes, Charles, you may 'ask mymoth ,er.' Another volley of reports lb - flowed, .and then Lavinia said, 'sow, Charles, don't whisper this to a living soul ; let us keep our own secret for the present.' All right,' said the General, I will say nothing; but next Tuesday I shall start to see your mother.' ' Perhaps you may'find it difficult to obtain her consent,' said Lavinia. At that moment a carriage drove up to the door, and immediately the bell WA 42 1•1111 g, and s the little Commodore entered.—P. T. I3AnNum, in Packard's Monthly for July. ' A DiI..E3DIA..—A young parson of the Universalist faith, many years since, when the Simim-pure Universalism was preached, started westward to at-4 tend a convention of his brethen in the faith. he took the precaution to carry a phial of cayenne in his pocket, to sprinkle his food with as a preventive of fever and ague. The convention met, and at dinner a tall _Hoosier observed the parson as he seasoned his meat, and addressed him this: • Stranger, I'll thank you for a leetle of that ere red salt, for Vui.kind o' curi ous to try it.' Certainly,' returned the parson, ' but you will find it very pow erful; be careful how you use it.' The Hoosier took the proffered phial, and feeling hini:,elf proof against any quantity of raw whisky, thought that be could stand the ' red salt' with im punity, and "accordingly sprinkled a junk of beef rather bountifully with it, and forthwith introduced it into his capacious mouth. It soon began to take hold. He shut his eyes and his features began to writhe, denoting -a very inharmonious condition physicall;y% Finally he could stand it no longer. He opened his mouth and screamed 'tire!' "fake a drink of cold water from the jug,' said the parson. ' Will that put it out' asked the martyr, suiting The action to the word. In a short time the unfortunate man began to recover, and turning to the parson, his eyed yet swim ming in water, exclaimed ' Stranger, you call youTself #t `Var .selist, I believe,' _ I (to,' mildly answered the parson. ` I want to know if you think it consistent with your belief to go about with hell-lire in your breeches pocket?' AN INvrrsTloN TO DINNER.-A gocid story is told of a couple of farmers who lived a few miles apart. One day one called on the other, hatipening around at dinner time. The person called up- , on, by the way, was a rather penurioup old fellow. lie was seated at the table, enjoying his dinner. The visitor drew to the stove, looking very wistfully to ward the table, expecting the old farm er to invite him to dine. The old fam er kept on eating. " 'What's the news up your' way, neighbor ?" Still eating. "No 'news, eh '." " No, I believe not." Presently a thought struck the visitor. " Well, yes, friend, I,did hear of one item of news that's worth mentioning." "lia, what is that?" , " Neighbor Jones has a cow that has five calves." "Is that so': Good gracious ! What in thunder does the fifth calf do when the others are sucking?" " Why, he stands and looks on, just ag I do, like it dUnl fedi." " Mary-, put on another plate." A clergyman in Troy recently heard the follolwing conversation between a Troy expressman and a 'Vest Troy re ceiver of a goo(i-sized box : " What do thorn are letters mean ' pointing to the "C. 0. 1)." on theeorner.• "Them means pay," explained the emphat ic expressman. . Them don't spell pay," rejoined the other; "you go along ; this ere box is paid for, I knoW, - .'" "I tell you what," returned the eN prestiman, the bright thought almost (knocking Win oft' the wagon teat, "theta ere letters mean Tome Omme-. diately Down,' " at which conclusive suggestion the happy man paid for the box, and the expressman. went back over the river with a new*- idea in his head. " Bob," said a young fellow at a fancy fair, "you are missing all the sights_ou this side." " Never mind, Bill,"•4et^ orted Bob, "I'm sighting all the mils es on the other." fi