Itlt If '. ttforgibon
WM. BREWSTER, EDITOR & PROPRIETOR
Miscellaneous Advertisements.
TERMS OF THE JOURNAL.
—,.,.. TERMS
TUG LIVER .
INVIGORATOR! 1 the T P.l . ,. ‘i ,!,.4., r r i ti N t o e D s 7 .3 0 . .-- .. published at
i If paid in advance $1,50
PRBPARED BY DR. SANFOItD. • If paid within six months after the time of
CompOkultied entirely of Gums. 1 subscribing 1,73
IS our of the best purgative and liver mcdi , If paid before the expiration of the year, 2,00
retards cost before the public, that acts as a en- ' And two dollars and fifty cents if not paid
tdrattitS, easier, milder, and mere effect.] than tillafter the expiration of the year. No subscript
Itlfly titer medicine known. It is not only a Ca- lion taken for a less period than six months.
*hank, but a Liver remedy, acting first on the I. All subscriptions are continued until nth.
:Liver to eject its morbid, then on the stomach erwise ordered, and no paper will be discontiutt
!and bowels to carry off that matter. thus nceom- ed until arrcarages ore paid, exeept at the option
plishing two purposes effectually. without any of of the publisher.
the painful feelings experienced in the operation . 2. Returned numbers are twer received by us.
of most Cathartics. It stregthens the system at ' , All numbers sent us in that way are lost, and
the same time Vint it purges it , and when taken' never accomplish the purpose of the sender. •
daily in moderate doses, will strengliten and' 3. Persons wishing to stop their subscriptions,
Jstild it up with unusual rapidity. : most )itty up orrearages, and send a teritteu or
The Liver is one o no r, the principal regulit- 1 verbal order to that effect, to the o ff ice of pub
torsl of the human ho- a tly ; and when it per- i lication in Huntingdon:
, forlialts functions well a the powers of the sys- I 4. Giving notice to a postmaster is neither a
tem are fully develop- 1 N ed. The stomach is legs or a proper notice.
almost entirely depen-l s o dent on the healthy 5. Alter ono or more numbers of n now year
action of the Liver for „,,, the proper pet Fon.- . Imre b een forwarded, a now year has common,-
auce of its functions. Ifi Wisethe stein:telt is : ed, and the paper will aid be discontinued until
to fault, the bowels are 0 at fault and the whole , arrorrageg are pnid. See No. 1.
system suffers in con- 0 sequence of o. orgrer ' The Courts have decided that refusing Intake
—the Liver— having s, ceased to do its duty. ai50 .,,,,,, 0r firm s h e of fi ce. orroosorior , n ,,,,,
for the diseases oft . that organ one of the cue i ng i t imeßned tar , l o i .„',„ A ,..,„ 0 ,,, ovi S e 7 c . ..
proprietors has tondo w it his study, in a prat.-
or intentional fraud.
tice of more than twen- ,74 ty years, t o find some • Subscribers living in distant counties, or in
remedy wherewith sal „0„ossroo1 the many other States, will be required to pay invariably
derangements to which 1:4 it is liable.
in advance.
To prove that this r o remedy is at last coo- arg•Th o t o o , wins w ilt he rig ,,, y ,,, 0 ,,,, is
. covered any person 7 troubled with Liver: 5 ,,i7 01 t cases.
- Complaint in iny . of its I , forms, has but to try I
. a bottle and c: avactionl.; is certain.
These gums remove 11 . 1 all morbid or 'sad
. matter from the system z supplying in their
pi sse a hem by now r., of bile, invigorating
the stomach, causing R t rim,' to digest well,
purifying the blocol,gi- 0 'ring tone and Width
to the whole meld.-
'., ry, removing thecanse
of the disease, and el , g ft:acting it radical cure
One dose after eat- ing is sittliicient to re
lieve the stomach nod ~ ~.
tprovent the fowl from
rising and souring. leg!
Bilious attncks neelZ cured, and what i s
better, prevented, u . .. the occasional use of
the Liver Invigorator.lt,
Only one dose tali, it before i. t
prevents Nightmare. i :
Only ono dose taken at mg , la ens the ,
towels gently, and cures Costiveness. I : Advertising and Job Work.
pepso. dose taken after each meal will c 0 Dys- Wu would remind the Advertising coin
in.
iro.. doss of two teaspoonfuls will it Ilw ys Inanity and all others who wish to bring
retneve Sick Ilentraelte. I their business extensively before the pub
Otto bottle taken for female obsetructionro
moves the micro of the disease, Hall makes n , lie s that the Joitrititi has the /argest cir
yerfeet cure.
relieves choijo, : culstion ',luny paper to the county—that
Only one dm immediately
- while j i is c instantly iucreasing4—and that it
One dose often repeated is a sure cure for :
,
Cholera Mortls, anti a preventive of Cl.olera. goes into the hands of our wealthiest cid
ligrOnly one bottle is needed to throw out of: zoos.
the itystem the effects of medicine:after a long
sieltllo3l. We would slso state that our facilities
eal'One bottle taken for Jaundice removes ! f u r ext:euting all kinds of JOB PRINT
WI sallowness or unnatural color from the skin. : I
\G are i qual to those of any other Office
Ono dose taken a short time before eating .
1 1, .s vigor to the appetite, and mottos food digest : ' int lit: county; and all Job Work eat run.
veil.
Ono dose often repeated cures Chronic Din, ; rd to our bands will be done neatly,
tines in lie woot forms, while. Summer . 1 " i 0,111 fly, rind sit prices which will be
Bowel complaints yield almost to the fin.? ili,e.
IL.
r.
rattier-in the world, as it nevandallio, l' Jrti......--1-7CX131.
lIIVeA few bottles rule, drop , : , liy ex , iting
the absorbents.
, . .
11e lititl . . I 11...:• I.! I•,, subscribers woo re
eye heir po Is•is, to iolorni us of illoae in their
We take pleasure in reeommenili ngthio me.l- :
idea es a preventive for Fever nod Ague, Chill,' ionic lints neighborhoods who are subscribers
Bever, and all Fevers of a Bilk.. Type. It log!, -Journal," tool have fettled to receive
operates with certainty, and thousands are ail- il i• Saone, RillVe the stealing of our pack-hook,
l i ng so t es tify to flu woadarfal virtues. I urn radians . the 3d of February.
All who use it are gliring their unanimous tee- I
tisnony in its litvor. : 1
ID NON'S improved SAUSAGE CUTTERS
w•Mix. water in die mouth pith the Invigo. I
•tor, and swallow both together. I nod sniffers, forsale by
The Liver Invigorator. ! Oct. G, '. - tB,-;it. JAS. A. BROWN
'ls a scientific medical discovery, and is daily
working eureg, almost too great ty hells , o. ft
,cacao as if by magic, even the finest dose giving
'benefit, and seldwu alor!111117.., ‘,.111 bi.LBC: 1.. re.
qtaired to yore any timid of Liver complaint,
from the worst Pinion. or Dyspepsia to unseen
men Ileadsohe s alhof which ure the result of
oliseased Liver.
PRICE ONE DOLLAR. PER. BOTTLE.
lilt. &sawn:tr., l'rnciTl,:t••,, 3.55 Broadway, I.:1C
fiend by IT. Mardaniglll, ,i: J. :i....tj lfuntmgdom
A tir.7dliS.-1T
211 E CASsVILLE A R T .
etNLY $22"2 QUAtTER
TEE PRESENT F.hi77.l.f.TY.
In. MCAT. WALSH, Principal,
Prot of Languages and Philosophy.
Chas. N. Jordiat. A. NI ,
Prof. of Latin, Greek, etc.
Jaynes W. Hughes,
Alathewatics.
Eleniasnin F. Houck.
Adjunct Prof. of Mathematics.
Geo. W. Linton,
Prof. of Vocal Manic.
Aim m. NeN. WALSH Preeeptrese,
' 'reacher of Botany, History, Reading; etc.
Him E. M Faulkner,
Toneher or Pollis Work, Pah:ling ; Drawing,
miss D. I. sfanlcY,. _ .
Teacher of Piano Music , Wax Fruit, Flo'rp,
11r..11.rwin.
I,, , her of English Branches.
PIRA J. M. Wallas,
'Poacher of Primary English.
'Phe recent success of this school is extraor•
d inary. Betides. being tir,eheit pest ono of the
kind ever Otablisherl;itienow the largest in
this section of the State. All branches are
taught, and students of all ages, and of both
sexes, nra received. The expenses for a year
need not be more than $9O. Students can en.
for whenever they wish. Address,'
JOHN D. WALSH, Cassville,
Huntingdon Co., Pa.
June23,'6B.
Notice to Coal Purchasers.
rJIHE subscriber is now prepared to futnish
A- Coal & Coke at his bank at Lilly's Sta
tion, on the Penn'a. Railroad, of as good quali
ty as can be had on tbd mountain. I will run
coal to Hollidaysburg, or any other point on the
Penn's. Railroad, if application is mode person
ally or by LAWr.
ALSO—I will agree to deliver COKE at any
bank. in cars, at four and a quarter cents per bosh
it viz t—Thirty-five pounds to the bushel,. or de
liver it in my own cars, at any point dewed, at
the lowest possible rates.
For either of the above articles, address
J. WGONIGLE,
hemlock, Cambria County, I'n,
Oars all orders will be propmply attended to.
Aug. 25, 1858.5 t.
i trriS' DRESS GOODS, of rich style
. 14 le criobeap at I). P. GWIN'S.
QPLEEDID BAG CARPET for 37i et,. per
rid at the cheap 14) ;, e m o n f
mowin..
ADVERTISEMENTS
Will he charged at the following rates:
I insertion. 2 do. 3 In.
Sin lines or less, $ 25 $ 37i $ 50
One square, (111 lines ; ) 50 75 1 00
Two " (32 " ) 100 150 200
3 too. 0 too. 12 no.
One square, $3 OD $5 00 $8 00
Two squal . oB, 500 800 12 00
+ column, 800 12 00 18 00
In., 12 00 18 00 27 00
do., 18 00 27 00 40 00
I do., 28 00 40 00 50 00
Business Cards of six linos, or less, $4.00.
Glass Pr....ring Jars, di ff erent sizes, for
ale by FISHER S; McILLIRTRIE,
um, nucKETs & SHOVELS!
For sal,. by tr. JAS. A. BROWN.
INDEX TO ADVERTISEIT*I7rq
I:rola nod Bilker ,
Samuel :caring machine.
storm
Claclwiek and. Bro.
stova for sale.
Climax (irtill Wan.
Lumbermen & Stockraiuens.
A titanium.. Lands.
Mountain 'Female Seminary.
Gifts! Gifts I! Gifts ill
Laud for sale.
1)r. A. P. Fields.
%Inwood Academy.
0 reen Willow Foundry.
S. M. Pillongill &Co.
Gutman's Clothing Store.
Brown's Hardware Store.
Fisher A MoMutrie's Store.
tiara 8. Smith's Urug A Grocery Store.
Great Purifier.
Iron City Ct}lledge.
Saving Fund.
Literary Baran.
Gulrsoio oil.
Great Beautifier.
Invigorator.
Cassville Seminary.
Lung Infirutery.
Town vs Country.
Italian Root Pills.
Country Mort:lmola.
Alexandria Foundry.
Huntingdon Warm Springs.
Consumption cured.
Bank Notice.
A ntiphluggistic Salt.
Huntingdon Hotel.
New Lard Press.
David P. 0 win's Store.
11. Roman's Clothing Stout.
Patent Portable Fence.
Premiums awarded.
Tho Journal Office.
Colon's Book Store
Huntingdon Mill.
Letter Copier.
Railroad Time.
H. K. Neff, M. D.
Hur.tingdon Foundry.
Dr. J. It. Huyett, Dentist.
Atorney's at Law.
Scott VBrown.
Wilson & Petrikin.
Thou P. Campbell.
r E CASSVILLE SEMINARY.
M2C2111=1..A.M..
Wax Fruit, $5,00 ; Wax Flowers, $3,00 ;
Grecian Painting, $3,00 ; Ornamental Pain.
Ling, $3,00 ; Leather Work, $2,00 ; Chenille
Work, $3,00; Ocean Shells & Blesses, $2,00;
Piano Music, $O,OO.
Those wishing to learn the above front a
teacher of experience, should do so immediate.
ly, for Miss Stanley can be retai ted at the
Seminary only a few months longer—she re•
turns to New York in the Spring.
"LIBERTY AND UNION, NOW AND FOREVER, ONE AND INSEPARABLE."
HUNT
*.elect gottrß.
From the Sat. Eve. Post.
WHERE THE ROSES GREW.
BY FLORENCE VERCY.
This is where the roses grew,
In the summer that is gone;'
Fairer bloom or richer hue
Never summer shone upon ;•
Oh, the glories vanished hence I
Oh, the sad imperfect tense!
This is where the roses grew
When the duly days were long—
When the garden all day through
Echoed with delight and song;—
lark 1 the dead and broken stalks
Eddying sown the windy walks!
Nearer was a desert waste,
Where no blossom•life is born,
Half so dreary and mildest,
Llano lonesome and so Melon],
Since in this we dimly seo
All the bliss that used to be.
Where the roses used to grow,
And the west-wind's wailing words
Tell in whispers faint and low
Of the famished hutuming•h;rd,—
Of the bees that search in vain
For the hoary-cells again I
This is where the roses grew,
Till the ground was all perfume,
And, whenever zephyrs blew,
Carpeted with crimson bloom ;
Now the chill and scentless air
Sweeps the flower plats brown and bare.
Hearts have gardens sad ar this
Where the roses bloom no more ;
Gardens where no summer-bliss
Can the slimmer bloom restore—
Where the snow melts not salty
At the warning kits of May.
Gardens where the vernal morn
Never abed their sunshine down,—
Whore are only stems and thorns,
Veiled in dead leaves, curled and brown
Gardens where we only see
Where the roses used is be!
GEN TLE -
ANNIE.
Thou wilt come no more, gentle Annie,
Like a flower thy spirit did depart,
Thou art gone, alas I like the many
That have bloum'd in the summer of my heart.
When the springtime comes, gentle
Annie,
And the wild flowers scntter'd o'er
the plain.
We have roomed and loved 'mid the hewers,
When thy downy cheeks were in their bloom;
Now I stand alone 'mid the flowers,
While they miugle their 'perfume 001 tity
tomb.
Choru's - -1;nall we nevermore, &c.
Ah I the hours grow and while tvn l a d ,
Near the et lent " e t ~W ere thou art laid;
And Inv
••v news down, when I wander
icy the streams and meadow:, where wo
played.
Cherus.--Shall We never snore behold thee,
Never bear thy winning voice again;
When the springtime comes, gorilla
Annie,
And the wild flowers 3 eatleCti o'er
the plain.
elect Pisctilang.
MR. BROWN'S MISHAPS,
Mr. Eliphalet Brown was u bachelor of
thirty-five, or thereabout; one of those men
who seem born to puss through the world
alone. Save this peculiarity, there was
nothing to distinguish Mr. Brown from the
multitude of other Browns who';.are born,
grow up, and dui in this world of ours.
It chem.! that Mr. Brown had occasion
to visit a town some fifty miles distant on
matters of business. It was his first visit
to the place, and he proposed stopping for
a day, in order to give himself an opportu
nity to look about.
Walking leisurely along the street, he
was all nt once accosted by a child of five,
who ran up to him exclaiming:
'Father !' I want you to buy me some
more candy.,
'Father l' was it possible that he, a
bachelor, was addressed by that title? He
could not believe it.
, Who are you speaking to, my dear ?'
he inquired of the little girl.
'I spoke to you, father,' said the little
one, surprised.
'Really,' thought Mr. Brown, 'this is
embarrassing.'
'I am not your father, my dear,' he said.
'What is your name ?'
Tho child laughed heartily, evidently
thinking it a good joke.
'What a funny father you are,' she said
'hut you are going to buy me some can
dy ?'
.Yea, yea, I'll buy you n pound if you
won't call me father any inore.' said Brown
nervously.
NGDON, PA., WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 8, 1858.
The little girl clapped her hands with
delight. The promise was al: she remem
bered.
Mr. Brown - proceeded to a confectionary
store, and actually bought a pound of eau.
dy. which he placed in the hands of the
little girl.
In coining out of the store they encoun
tered the child's mother.
'0 mother.' said the little girl, 'just see
how much candy father has bought for
'You shouldn't have bought her sa
much at a time, Mr. Jones,' said the lady
'I am afraid she will make ho rsulf sick.
But how did you happen to get home so
quick ? I did not expect you till night.'
'Jones—l—madam,' said the embar
rassed Mr. Brown, 'its all a mistake; [ ain't
Jones at all. It isn't my name. I ant
Eliphalet 'Brown, of W—, and this is the
first time I ever came into this city.'
'Good Heavens ! Mr. Jones, what ha s
put this silly tale into your head ? You
have concluded to change your name,
have you ? Perhaps it's your intention
to change tour wife
Mrs. Jones' tone was now defiant, end
tins tended to increase Mr. Brown's em
barrassment. .
havn't any wife, madam; I never had
nay. On my word an a gentleman I nev
er wa, married.
'And do you intend to palm this tale off
upon me ?' said :Mrs• Jones, with excite
ment. 'lf you're not married, I'd like to
know who I am
hove no doubt you are a most respect.
able lady; said Mr. Brown, 'and I con
jecture, Irom what you have said. that
your name is Jones; but mine is Brown.
madam, and always was:
'McMillin.' said her mother, suddenly,ta.
king the child by the arm, and leading
her op to Mr. Brown, 'Melinda, who is this
gentleman
'Why, that's father!' was the child's
immediate reply, no she confidingly placed
her hand in his.
'You hear that Mt. Jones, do you 1
You hear what the innocent child says,
end yet you have the unblushing impu
dence to deny that you ere my husband !
The voice of nature, speaking throu ! O . Lthe
ota au Id overWhein2 you. rif eto
know if you ere not her rasher why you
are buying candy for her! I would liko
to have you answer that. Eut I presume
you never saw her before in your life.' •
.1 never did. On my honor. I never
did. I told her I would give her
dy if shn houldn't call rpther any
'You did, did you f Brib!..d your own
child not, !"..; call you father ! 0, Mr. Jon
es, that is Infamous ! Do you introd to
desert me, sir. and leave me to the cold
charittes of the world 1 and is this your
first step.
Mrs Jones won co overcome that, with
out any :yarning, she fell back upon the
sidewalk in a fainting fit.
Instantly a number of persons ran to her
assistance.
Gls your wife subject to fainting in this
way?' asked the first comer of Brown.
don't know,' maid Mr. Bro wn. 'She
isn't my wife. I don't know anything
oho. t her.
, Why, it's Mrs. Jones, ain't it r
, Yeq, but I'm not Mr. Jones.'
'Sir.' said the first ppeaker, sternly, 'this
is no time to jest. I trust that you are
not the cause of the excitement which must
have oecasicred your wife's fainting fit.
You had better calla coach and carry her
home directly.'
Poor Brown woo dumbfounded.
wonder,' thought he, 'whether it',
possible that I'm Mr. Jones without know•
ing it. Perhaps I'm really Jones, and
have gone crazy in consequence of which
I fanny that my name is Brown. And
yet I don t think I'm Jones. • In spite of
rill, I will iiisist that my name is Brown.'
'Well, sir, what are you wailing for
It is necessary that your wife should he
removed at once. Will you order n car
riage.
Brown saw that there was no 1190 to
protract the discussion by a denial.
therefore, without contesting the point, or
dered a hackney coach to the spot.
Mr. Brown accordingly lent au arm to
Mrs. Jones, who had somewhat recovered
and was about to close the door upon
her.
'Why. ore you no: going yourself ?'
'Why, no, why should I ?'
'Your wife should not go nlone, she . has
hardly recovered.
Brown gave a despairing glance at the
crowd around him, and denoting it use
less to make opposition where so tansy
seemed thoroughly convinced that he was
Mr. Jones, followed the lady in.
At ten o'clock they till left an 311111 of
the boys soy, 'Peter, won't you go home
with us' and all sech things. Aster they
left, there I sot by myself until a nigger
gal came in to me and ses
'Massa Peter, Nliss Sal's a waiting (or
ou,'
Where shall I drive 1' said the whip. ' 'Whorls she rev I.
k_e 4 ll , , i • .•,44p,
•k„ { 4 It r
.I-1-1 don't know,' said Mr. Brown,—
.Where would you wish to be carried 1'
Home, of course,' murmured Mrs. Jon-
don't know,' said Brown.
'No. 19 ll street,' said the gentle
'non already introduced, glancing con
temptuously at Brown.
Will you help nut, Mr. Jones?' said the
lady. , 1 am not fully recovered from the
fainting lit into which your cruelty drove
me.'
'Are you quite sure that lam Mr.
Jones? nsded Brown with anxiety.
'Or course,' said Jones.
'Then,' said he, resignedly. suppose
I ans. But if you will believe me, I was
firstly convinced this morning that my
name was Brown, and to tell the truth I
have'm any recollection of this house.'
Brown helped Mrs. Jones into the par
lor; but good heavens ! conceive the as
tonishntent of all, when a man was discov
ered in an arm chair. who wns the very
fac si male of Mr. Brown, in form, fen
are, and every other respect!
'Gracious !' exclaimed the lady.--'which
—which is my husband !'
An explanation was given, the mystery
cleared up; and Mr. Brown's pardon
sought for the embarrassing mistake. It
was freely accorded by Mr, Brown, who
was quite delighted to think that after all
he was not Mr. Jones, with a wife and
child to the boot.
Mr. brown has not since visited the
place where this 'Commedy of Errors'
happened. He is afraid of losing his in
den tity.
HOW SAL LW ME GOT MARRIED,
-0-
BY PETER SPORUM.
'Well, at last, the night cutn, that orful
night as was to fetch ine into a new state
of being, and it found me in a dreadful tut
lust I felt good, then bad, fust proud, and
then skcered like five hundred —I went
over the mornin' afore the eventful night
to see Sal, an found her taking it mit) , no.
sy, rather in a hurry for night to cum; I
thought, as fur me, I was in a hurry one
minit, and the next I felt like I'd a rather
a little it hod been put off.
Astor supper I washral. also.. I vul on
the akaneat sort of a shirt that Aunt Amu
had fixed mity nice an smooth, .hen draw
ed on about es nice a set of harness as you
eve; seed, an arter mam an Aunt lane had
printed up and fixed ulv hal,. and cravat.
was eo oil I puts to Sal's Dad's
an I reckon I donenbout as much thinking
over thar as was ever done by enny
other feller in the same time. At last I
ar.i"", and was marehel into the presence
of Sal—she sort a blushed an then set
her head a one side on looked as sweet as
any flower you ever seed. I thought she
was about as purty a cretur as ever I lade'
my ise upon.
Directly Sal's sister says, the parson's
cum, and in we walked where there was
about fifty folks, and I felt miry bad and
nasty skeery, but tried my level best to keep
a stiff u,aper lip. Well, we took our place
Sal a hangin on my anal and me a lookin'
at the fore. The parson ses : 'Du you
take this woman (lie mite a sed young la
lady), as you hold by the hand to be your
lawful wife, to help her an keep her, till
death does you part I'
'l'll do my best,' sez I, stannin rust on
ono leg and theft on Vother, for all the
world like a turkey on a hot rock.
Then he looked at Sal, and see he :
'Du you take this man (like be didn't
know my name) as you hold by the hand,
to be your lawful husband, to nus him an
to help him, an to honor and obey him, till
deth dos you part ?'
.Yes, sir.' ses Sal.
to's he,' I pronounce you both
Irian and wife, salute your bride.' With
that I clenched Sal, and gave her about an
hearty a buss 'as you ever heard; then the
fellers all cum around and kissed Sal like
all blazes ; you could see that it dun 'ens
good, front the way they pitched in—l
thought Sal orter a stopped it, but she ne
ver said a word ; as fur me, I kissed right
an left, cum very nere kissin' a nigger
gal as was fetchin in some water, when
every one begun a gigglin and begun to
feel mity mean.
After a while the kissin an foolin was
over, and we all pitched into the goodies
on if ever saw sweetmeats fly it was then,
1 a till 1 like to have dropped, and every
body else dun thar best.
'She's in her room,' sez she.
'Well, tell her to coma down,' ses I, .1
am reddy to go anywhnr she wants.'
'Hut she's in bed,' ses she.
'Oh yes,' see [,'l forgot,' but ses[,'it's
early yet,ain't it ?'
She seed I was sheered, and begun n
sniggenn, till I picked up ray hat and fol
lowed her, till ate cum to a door and ses,
•that's yore room.' My heart jumped up
to my thrnnt as I nooked nt,the Bore, but
nobody answered, I necked agio, and then
n gettin despirrit, I opened it, and jeowilli
bins, the cold chills run over me till I felt
like somebody was pullin a cedar bush up
and do.vn my back—thar waa Sal fist
asleep or pretendin like, as I found out, an
the candle a shining as light as day.
I stood sum time lookin mity foolish, an
then puts my hat on a cheer—next I dras
my cote off ; tt was mity hard to gti oft—
then I shed my jacket and the balance of
my harness, till I cum to my boots, them
was the woos. I pulled, I tugged, I jer-
Iced, but they would not cum off, and hop
pening to look around, I thought I seed Sal
a peepin at the outer one eye, so I blows
the light out, gits my boots off, and then
-- but it ain't nobody's business,
so I shan't tell my more,
Well, I've tried marryin sum time, and
must say that arter a teller gets used to it,
it ain't a bad thing.
*nitimmt an Mt.
LOVE% VICTIM
Oh, list to me, Lizzy,
You sweet lamp of candy !
Lure makes ma feel dizzy,
Like sugar and brandy ,
My vision is reeling—
My brains are all burning—
And the sweet cream of feeling
le curdled by churning:
For my hesrt 'neath my jacket
Is up and down jumping,
And keep such a racket
With its thumping and bumping
0, show me one muiht—'tii my last iup•
0,-116.1
crave nothing furtlior—'twill ho my
Oh, zr.y, wr,r-u
I toil its nil mon
Pen dons trip and. bonstod—
A broken down tors,:
The joys of my bosom
Hnve cut sticks and :
I linow'd I should Into 'em,
Whet' . 4 tru`, von banisl,Y,
The world has grown dreary,
In its• sackcloth of sorrow ;
Of life I am weary,
And I wish that tomorrow
Would dawn on my grave, in that penc e
giving vnl,ey,
Where I'd care not for you, nor Susan,
nor Sally.
I know '4B a sin too—
But I'm bent on the notion—
throw myself into
The deep briny ocean,
Where mud•eels and cat-fish
On my body shall riot,
And flounders and flat fish
Select me for diet;
Them soundly ill slumbor
Beneath the rough billow,
And crabs without number
Shall crawl o'er my pillow:
But my spirit shall wander through gay
coral bowers:
And frisk with the mermaids --it shall by
the powers!
"PUT HER THROUGH.
A gentleman had occasion to send his
little daughter up to the garret tot some
articles which ho wanted. Tho child soon
returned, crying, and upon being asked
what the trouble was, replied "that the
snow had sifted in upon t h •t garret stairs
and she slipped down and hurt herself."
'Well, did you go what I told you I"
inquired the father. She replied that she
had nit. "Well then," he exclaimed,
starting up, go ; I guess I Mat amid
of a little snow."
After he had gone, the child observed
that she hoped papa would fail just n little
to pay him for laughing at her.
Soon afterwards a distant bumbling and
rolling was heard, accompanied by the
sound of suppressed wrath. The family
listened with awakened interest, but the
object of their solitude wns heard stove
whistling quite soberly, as though nothing
had happened. lie crossed two rooms
above, and, as he approached gie head of
the Stairs, thundered out :
~ Open the chamber door 1 Next you
know, you'll have me tumble down here
and break toy neck. It's so clerk n0w..."
But the sentence was never finished.—
Trip went his heels, and, rolling nni
thumping, he sprawled his six feet of
length upon the kitchen floor, where ho
was greeted with bursts of merriment
from the collected family. He lay quite
still for a moment. At last shouted out :
‘.op.ti the cellar-d00r...1 way (13 well
pot her th r o t igh clear to the bottom !"
VOL. XXIII. NO. 49.
toCittoni
The lellosting story is told of is revolu
tionary soldier, who was running for Cop
greys. It appears that our hero was oppo
sed by n much yourrger man, who had nev
er "been to the, w a rs" and it Was the tvqnt.
of old "revolut,iimm," to tell the people
of the hardships he endured. Says lie :
, Fellow•citiZens, I hove (ought and bled .
for my country—help to whip the British .
and the Indians. I have slept upon the
field of bottle with no.covering but the can
opy of heaven. I • have walked over fro
zen ground till every footstep was marked
with blood.' Just about this tinto, one of
the "sovereigns," who had become very
much affected by his . tote a woe, walked
Up in front of the speaker, wiping 'the
tears from his eyes with
. the extremit) of
his coat tail, and interrupting him says:--
'Did you say you fought the British an,i
the Indians ?' 'Yes,' responded the old
"revolutionary." Did you say the. you
had slept on the gronntl, while serving
your country, without any kiver 1' 'Yes,
sir, 1 did.' Did you say that you had fol
lowed the enemy of your country over fro
zen ground till every footstep was marked
with blood I"Yes; exultingly replied the
speaker. 'Well, then, says the tearful
"sovereign," as he gave a sigh of painful
emotion, be if I don't think
you've done enough for your country, nod
I'll vote for the other man.'
Mmes.—The local editor of the
Republic has mum himself one of the
immortals by the publication of n disco
very, which be has made, of great iriirior•
Lance to mothers; it is an info! lible means
of keeping babies, from two to ten months
old, perfectly quiet, for two hoar,. The
modes opaandi is as follows : As sohn as
tne squatler a sakes, set the child up,
propped by pillows if it cannot sit alone,
and smear its fingers with thick molpsses;
then put half a dozen feathers into his
hands, and the young one will not and pick
the feathers from one hand to the other un
til it drops asleep. As soon as it wakes,
more molasses and more feathers; and in
place of the nerve astonishing yells, there
will be silence and enjoyment nnspealca
. blo !
WRY HE BET ON RIK
A .ri.rgihieit relates nn anebfloie of Mr.
Wise's fatuous stumping tour before the
fast gubernatorial etection, He vreasintras
dile4 to a famous character of their coon•
ty, Mr• F-, when the following con
versation °mired
Mr. F "Glad to see you, Mr. Wise !"
Mr. W. ' , floppy to see you, Mr. F."
Mr. W. ''Sorry I can't rote for you : Mr,
Wise.
Mr. W. "Sorry for that, too; but this is
n free country—a man can vote as he plea-
Mr. F. "Bus 111 bet on you wise."
Mr. W. .Glad to hear that from you,
Mr. F—, as you are a man of discern
ment in all betting matters."
Mr. F. , Let tne tell you a story. Some
years ago I was at the Richo,olut races.—
There were several fine-looking horses
entered. Presently they led imam ugli
est ratobonest scrawniest-looking beast
that ever you did see ; but he had fire in
his eye. I got any odds I pleased, and
won every het. So, if I can t vole for you
Mr. WiFie, I'll go my death betting for
you !"
Wise laughed heartily, and accepted the
remarks of Mr. F - as a good omen;
which was in a few weeks afterwards ver
ifies! by the result of the election.
it.,' (o`l l .lo , h'li.i.lgE.O.
ser What is the difference between a
blind man and a sailor in preen ? Ans.—
One can't seo to go : the other can't go to
car Which two letters of the alphabet
have the power of transforming word am
ide into a pattern ? Ans —8 and X: sam
ple and xample.
ger What to that which you can give
away, and have it increased, and yet re
tain it yourself Ans.—lnformation.
Why is a retired carpenter like a
lecturer I—A ns. Because he's an ex.plancr.
rigr When does a cow become real es
tate ! Ans.—When she is turned into a field.
Cdr What day in Spring is a command
to go attend ? Ans.—March f nuth !
go_ Why is a handsome
. tvainan like
bread , Ana.—Bncause she is oftettoastea:
ner- •CON' (by an Insane contributor).--
What Highland sport would a ,number of
young girls aonvertiing - reiniud• you of
Ans.- Dears talking !
Bar 1% by is love like u d*b leg!—.l
Ans.—Because it is often hid MA. breast.
ger What relation is that , Alta 19 ita
hither who is not it's fathet's ski:rani
Aq..3, is daughter.