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f I :3, .
WILLIAM BREWSTER,} EDITORS.
SAM. G. WHITTAKER,
GOD HELP THE POOR
Darkly the winter day
Dawns on the moor ;
How can the heart be gay—
Who can endure ?
See, the sad, weary wight
Wanders Irom noon to night
Shelterless I homeless quite 1
God help the poor I
Now the red robin, here,
Sits on the sill,
Not s'en a grain of bore
Touches its bill ;
So with the houseless poor, .
Wandering from door to door,
Seeking a morsel more ;
Lord, 'tis Thy will,
Night spreads her sable wing;
Where can they lie 7
Sorrow like theirs must bring
Tears to their eye.
Full the cloud torrent falls.
Down they must lie in halls,
Each b his Maker calls,
"Lord, let me die I"
Ye whom the heavens bless,
Give from your store ;
'Twill nc'er make your treasures less,
Must make them more ;
For he that gives cheerfully
God loves so tenderly ;
Give to them—pray with me,
"God help the poor I"
Yonder a woman goes;
Barefooted o'er the snow,
Famished and cold :
How hir poor children cling
To her side shivering.,
Chickens beneath her wing
Doth she enfold I
Fast falls the sleet and rain,
Slowly they go,
By forest sheltered plain,
Waiting their woe.
City street note they see,
Here they roam wild and free,
Are they not flesh es we ?
Canst thou say, "No ?"
White is the virgin snow,
Bitter the morn ;
See those 4tarved children go
Wretched l forlorn I
Feet without shoes or hose,
Backs without warm clothes,
Strangers to calm repose
Why were they born ?
See that lone, aged man,
Snow white his hair ;
Mark hia and visage wan,
Deep his despair.
Craving the rich man's food,
Owner of many a rood,
Lord, thou art always good,
Hoar his heart's prayer.
A DAY tH PETTICOATS
BY A MODEST MAN,
git couldn't think of such a thing.'
'But you must. My happiness de.
pends on it Here, put on the thingum
bobs, and the what's his name '
And my friend, Bob Stylre, held up be
fore my hesitant gaze a suit of feminine
Ills idea was that I should personate his
lady-love for one day, to prevent anybody
from suspecting the truth—namely, that
she had joined him in a runaway marriage
party until it should be too late for inter•
ference ; that is, until the minister should
have tied a knot between them, that nosh•
ing but a special grant of the Legislature
This scheme was not actually so absurd
as it appeared at first sight. Muggy Lee
was a tall, queenly woman, with an al
most masculine air, and at that time, I had
a very slight form—almost effeminate, so
that in fact, there was really but little dif
ference in that point. Then I had light
hair, tolerably long, and a fresh complex
ion. Part my hair in the middle, and put
a bonnet on my head, and few persons
would have suspected but what I was re
ally one of the softer sex. The accessor•
ten also gave me quite a delided resem
blance to Maggy Lee, especially when, as
in this case, the disguise was her own.
Then the day chosen for the runawa y
match was an auspicious one. Maggio's
father was to drive her to D-, a small
village near where she lived, and there
she was to join a ailing-party down
river. to the grove three miles below, from
which the party was to return in the eve
ning in carriages.
_ . .
Our plan was that I should be in wait
ing in the village, should go on the boat
with the sailiug•party, while Maggie, after
leaving her father, should slip off with Bob
Styles across the country.
At last, I got dressed, and presented my-
self before Maggy Lee, blushing a great
deal I believe, feeling much pinched about
the waist, and with an uncomfortable con-
vcousness that my—shirt-sleeves were too
short, or wanting altogether.
Everything finished, in the way of toil
et, Bob Styles took me into his light wa
gon, drove me over to D—, by a seclu
ded route, and left me at the hotel, where
the sailing party was to assemble. Seve
ral of the pic-nickers where already there
and they greeted my cavalier cordially, (ev
erybody knew Bob Styles.) asking if he
was going with them, etc. He told them
he was not.
'Pressing business engagements, you
know, and all that sort of thing. Duced
sorry I can't go, though. I just had time
to bring Miss Lee over, end now I'm off.
Mr. Bimby, this is Miss Lee. Miss With
ergall, Miss Lee," and he rattled ofl a long
string of introductions, which convinced
me that but few of the company were ac
quainted with the young lady whom I was
i.hus personating—a very fortunate thing
for the preservation of my disguise.
Mr. Bimby, a tall, legal looking man,
with a hook nose, and eye-glass and fluffy
hair, seemed to be prepossessed with my
personnel, and I overheard him whisper to
Bob Styles, as he went out :
'Nice-looking girl, that Miss Lee.'
'Yes,' answered Bob, with a mischiev.
ous glance at me, 'she is a nice girl, tho'
a little go-ahead sometimes. Keep a little
look out an her will you?' then, lowering
his voicie—'not a bad [notch fur you old fel
low ; she's rich,'
'ls she ?' said Mr. Bimby, his interest
'On my honor,' replied Bob. 'Forty
thousand dollars in her own right. Day,
day!' and he was gone.
Muggy Lee, artful creature ns she was ;
h nd told her father that the ceiling party
was to assemble at another hotel,— thither
he had token her. Having business in
D—, he left her there merely saying
'that he would send the carries, for her. at.
11 o'clock. She, like 4 dutiful daughter,
kissed him, bid hint good bye, and before
he had gone a hundred rods, took a seat
an Bob Styles' light wagon, which had been
driven up to the back door us old Leo's
carriage drove away from the front, and
the old story ol headstrong love end preju
diced age was enacted over again.
As for us, of the pic-nic excursion, we
had n delightful sail down to the Grove,
but somehow, I could not enjoy it as much
as I ought to have done. When I walked
on board the boat I felt awkward, as if ev
erybody was looking at Inc. I found Mr.
Bnnby, ns I had suspected, a young and ri
sing lawyer, mighty in Blackstone and his
own opinion. He insisted on paying for
my ticket, (the boat was a regular excur
sion packet,) and purchasing enough or.
anges, pears and candies to set up a street
stand Four or five time I was on the ve
ry point of swearing at his impudent offi
ciousness, but bit my tongue just in time
to prevent the exposure. But it was not
with him that I found say role hardest to
No ; the young ladies were the difficult
ones to deceive. For instance, there was
one among them, a beautiful girl of seven
teen, ju,.. returned from boarding school,
who hod not seen Maggie Lee for three
years. Of course, she was delighted to see
me, when she found out that I was •Mag
gie, which, by the way, did not occur until
after we had started. She threw herself
into my arms, pulled my veil aside, and
kissed me half a dozen times in a manner
that made my finger ends tingle for an half
hour. It was all very nice, but if I had
been propria persona, I would have liked
it better. As it was, I felt as if I were 'ob
taining goods under false pretences," and
that lawyer Bitnby might issue a warrant
for my arrest on that ground, at any mo
A whole knot of crinoline then surroun
ded me, on the upper deck-of the boat, to '
the utter exclusion and consequent disgust
of Mr. Biinby and the other gentlemen. I
kept very quiet, only speaking monosylla
bles, in a falsetto voice ; but the others—
Lord bless you ! how they gabbled ! Un•
der a strict promise of secrecy, the little
boarding school maiden, who had kissed
me so affectionately7fevealed all her love
affairs, and became unpleasantly confiden
tial about other matters—innocent enough
in themselves but not customarily talked
of between ladies and gentlemen.
I was terribly embarrassed, but it would
not do to give up then. As soon as my
trick should become known, Bob Styles'
trick would also come out; and as news
of that kind travels fast in the country, he
and I is lady-love would be telegraphed and
followed before they could reach Philadel
phia, where the Styles family lived, where
the knot was to be tied.
" LIBERTY AND UNION, NOW AND FOREVER, ONE AND INSEPARABLE. "
HUNTINGDON, PA., WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 2, 1857.
The river breeze was very fresh where
we sat, and I noticed that seyeral of the
ladies were glancing uneasily nt me. I
couldn't divine the reason, until Jennie,
my little friend from boarding school, laid
her face dangerously close to mine, and
whispered—.My dear Maggie, your dress
is blowing up terribly high--hour ahklee
will be the town talk with the gentlemen!'
Now I was conscious of having a very
small foot fora man and had donned a pair
of open work stockings which came up to
my waist, almost, with a pair of gaiters
borrowed from the servant girl, in all of
which toggery my "running gear" look•
ed quite feminine and respectab!e ; but the
idea o' the gentlemen talking about my
ankles, and of being cautioned thus by a
young girl, who would have been frighten
ed to death if I had told her the same
thing yesterday, was too much for me. 1
burst into a sort of strangulated laugh, thrt
I could only check by swallowing half of
my little filagree Ince edged handherchiet.
'rhe young ladies all looked at me, in ap
parent astonishment at such a voice, and I
wanted to laugh all the tnore. Fortunate
ly, Mr. Bimby came to my rescue at the
moment, and edged himself in among the
crinoline. At ibis juncture, and before Mr. Bin.
'May I sit here?' he asked, pointing toby had time to apologize for his accident,
a low stool near me, little Jennie came running into the pavil
'Ali, thank you,' said Bimby—with a ion which served as a ball room. As she
lackadaisical air, which nauseated me, as came near, I perceived that her hands were
coming from one man to another---(you are clutched tightly in her dress, and I posi
es kind as you are Inscinating!' lively shuddered, as she whispered to me:
'You flatter me !' , 'Oh, Maggie ! come and help me fix my
'1? No, indeed ; praise of yc.o cannot skirts—they are all coming down !'
be flattery, Miss Lee.'
What should Ido ? I was in agony. A
'Oh, sir, really, you area very naughty cold perspiration broke out upon my fore
man, I said, in the most feminine tone I head. I wished myself a thousand miles
could command away, and anathematized Bob Style's
lie cast a languishing glance at me thro' masquerading project inwardly, with fear.
the black lace veil, and I fairly began to lid I maledictions.
fear for his 'feelings.' I said I was tired out.
We soon arrived at the grove, and found b o d y doe go ?
our band---engaged beforehand—awaiting No, nothing would do, bat I must an
us. Of course, dancing was the first am- company her to the house of the gentle
usernent. and lawyer Bin - thy led me out man who owned the rrrov , assist her
me to take the lady's part in my dance, s„ wen ,
bu: I soon got accustomed to it. w• hen a What if it should be necessary to re
waltz was proposed, I resolved to have a move the greater part of her raiment!
little amusement at the expense of the un- What if she shhuld tell ice to do some
fortunate Biinby. . sewing? What, if in the midst of all the
I had first made him ?urposely isiloas, embarrassment of being closeted with a
by dancing with two other young fellows, belt thinl girl of seventeen, in a state of
one of whom I knew in my own cliarac- 1 comparative freedom from drapery, my
ter, hut who never suspected ine as Nlag• real sex and identity should be discovered
gie Lee. This young man who was a by her?
greit woman-killer--a sort of cagy devil- I felt as Van apoplectic ht would be a
may care rascal, who made the ladies run fortunate occurrence for rne,just then.
after him, by his alternate warmth of ac
tion and coolness of protestation-•I select
el to ' , play off" against my legal admirer.
t allowed him to hold me very closely iind
occasionally looked at hits with a half-fas.
Classing expression. When we stopped
dancing. he led me to my seat, keeping his
arm around my waist. and I permitted it.
Having thus stirred Bitnhy up to feats
of wrathful valor, I asked one of the gen.
tlemen to direct the musicians to play a
waltz. Bimby came immediately.
, Ahem—a Miss Lee, shall I—a have
the honor of—a—trying a waltz with you!'
I siniled a gracious acquiescence and
Now, I amen old stager at waltzing. 1
can keep it up longer than any non pro.
fessional dancer, male or female, whom I
ever met. As long as the Cachucha or
Schounebrunnen rings in my ears, I can
go on, if it is for a year.
Not so Bimby. lie plead want of prac
tice, and acknowledged that he soon got
•Aha, old boy,' thought 1, I'll give you
a turn, then I'
But I only smiled, and said that I
should get tired first.
'Oh yes ?' he exclaimed, 'of course; I
can waltz as long as any one lady, but not
For the first three minutes my cavalier
did well. Ho went smoothly and evenly,
hut at the expiration of that time, began
to grow warm. Five minutes elapsed,
and Bimby's breath came harder and ha,
dor. On we went, however, and I scor
ned to notice his slackening up at every
round, when we wassed my seat. After
some ten or twelve minutes, the wretched
:Ilan gasped out between his steps :
n—are you not--get—getting
.Oh, not ! I burst forth, as coolly as if
we were riding round the room—.Oh no,
I feel as if I could wal2 rill night.'
The look of despair that he gave was
terrible to see.
I was bound to see him through, how
ever, and we kept at it. Busby stagger
ed and made wild steps in all directions.
His shirt collar wilted, and his eyes pro.
truded, his jaw hung down; and, alto
gether, I saw he could not hold out much
'This is delightful,' I said, composedly,
'and you. Mr. Bimby, waltz so easily !'
'Puff-puff-eh-puff yes oh-puff very-puff
de lightful.' gasped he.
'Don't you think it ought to go a little
lie rolled his eyes heavenward in ago•
.Ah-puff-puft-I d •don't•ah -puff -don't
So,•when we neared the musicians, I
said, 'Faster, if you please—faster!' and
they played a la whirlwind.
Poor Bimby threw his feet about him
lilce.a fast pacer, and revolved after the
manner of a teeto tum which was nearly
run down. At bathe staggered a step
backwards, and spinning eccentrically
away from me, r•lched headlong into the
midst of a bevy of Indies in a corner. I
turned around coolly, and walking to my
seat, sent the young woman killer for a
glass of ice water.
The miserable lawyer recovered his
senses just in time to see me thank 13 . :s
rival for the water.
I got some idea from this, of the fun
young ladies find in tormenting us poor
devils of the other sex.
•could not some.
However, I nerved myself up for the
task, and accompanied Jennie to the house
designated. An old Indy showed us into
her chamber, and Jennie, heaving a sigh
of reiief let go her dregs. As she did so,
a--- pardon my blushes !...•tt petticoat fell
to the floor. She was about to proceed,
but I alarmed her by a sudden and vehe.
!neat gm stare:
Stop !' I cried frantically, and forget.
ting my falsetto; stop ! don't undress for
God's sake !'
She opened her great brown eyes to
their widest extent.
'And why not ?'
'Because I nm a---can yo:t keep
a secret ?'
'Why yes•-.•how Gighteoed you look !
Why what is the matter--•-Maggie!----you
why-•--oh ! oh !! oh I!!
And she gave three fearful screams.
'Hush, no noise, nr 1 am lost!' I ex
claimed, putting my hand over her mouth.
, 1 swear I mean you no harm; if I had I
would not have stopped you. Don't you
She was all of a tremble, poor little
thing; but she saw the force of my argu.
'Oh, sir,' she said, 'I see you arsk man
but what does it all mean ? Why did you
dross so ?'
I told her the story, as briefly as possi
ble, and extracted from her a promise of
the most sacred secrecy.
I then went outside the doov, and wai
ted till she had arranged her tired, when
she called me in again. She-had heard
of me from Maggie and others, and wan
ted to hear all the particulars; so I sat
down by her, and we had a long talk,
which ended in a mutual feeling of friend
less and old acquaintanceship, quite won
derful for people meeting for the first time.
Just as we started to go back to the pavil.
lion, I said that 1 must relieve my mind
of one store burden.
'Anti what is that ?' she asked.
'Thoso kisses. You. thought
. 1 was
Maggie Lee, or you would not have given
. them. They were very sweet, but 1 sup
pose I must give them back.'
And I did.
She blushed a good deal, but she didn't
resist, only when I got through, she glan
ced up timidly and said:
•I think you are real naughty, anyhow.'
When we returned, I found lawyer
Bimby quite recovered from his dizziness,
and all bands prepared for supper, which
was served in the ball room. I eat be
tween Bimby and Jennie and made love
to both of them in turn; to one as Maggie
Lee, and to the other as myself. After
supper, at which I astonished several by
eating rather more heartily than young
ladies generally do, we had more dancing
and I hinted pretty strongly to Mr. Bim•
by that 1 should like to try another waltz,
He didn't take the hint
Finding it rather dry amusement to
dance with my own kind, I soon aban
doned that pleasure, and persuaded Jen
nie to stroll off into the moonlight with
me. We found the grove a charming
place, full of picturesque little corners,
and rustic seats, and great grey rocks lea•
ning out over the river. On one of these
latter, a little bench was placed, in a nook
sheltered from the wind, and from sight.
Here we sat down, in the full flood of
the moonlight, and having just had dinner
I felt wonderfully in need of a sear. Ac
cordingly, I went back to a little stood
near the ball room, and purchased sever
al of the wondering woman who sold re
frebhments. Then returning to the seats
by the rocks, I gave up all cares or fears
for my incognito, and revelled in the plea
sures of solitude----the fragrance of my
cigar—the moonlight—and little Jennie's
How long we sat there, heaven alone
knows. We talked, and laughed, and
sang, and looked in each other's eyes, and
told fortunes, and performed all the non
sensical operations common amongst
young people just falling in love with
each other, and mignt have remained there
until this month of August, in this year
of our Lord Eighteen Hundred and Fifty
seven, for aught I know, had not the car
riage been sent to convey us home, and
the rest of the company begun to wonder
where we were.
tams fears, and the fears a search, head
`ad by the valiant Bimby. They called
and looked and listened, but our position
down in the sheltered nook among the
rocks, prevented them from hearing us or
At length they hit upon our path, and
all come along single file, until they got
to the open space above.
They sawn sight.
I was spread out in a free and easy pa.
aition, my bonnet taken off; and my hair
somewhat tounled up. One foot rested
on the ground, and the other on a rock,
about level with my head (regardless of'
ankles this time) and there I sat, puffing
away in a very unlady like style, at a
high flavored Concha.
Jennie was sitting close beside tne with
her bead almost on my shoulder, and her
waist almost encircled by my nrm. Just
as the potty came along above us, I laugh
ed out in a loud, masculine voice—
. Just think of poor what's his-name
there—ilimby ! Suppose ho knew that
he had been making love to a man ?'
'Hush cried Jennie. 'Look! there he
is—and, oh; my gracious ! there is the
whole company !'
Yes, we were fairly caught. It was
of no use far me to clap on my bonnet and
assume falsetto again—they had seen too
much for that Besides by this time, Bob
Styles and Boggle Lee were doubtless
'one flesh,' and my disguise was of no
further importance, so I owned up and
told the story.
Lawyer Bimby was in a rage. He
vowed to kill me, and even squared
but the rest of the party laughed at him
so unmercifully, and suggested that we
should waltz it out together, that he final.
ly coaled down, and slunk away, to take
some private conveyance back to D
Bob Styles and I are living in a large
double house together. He often says
that he owes his wife to my umsqu erading
but he doesn't feel under any obligations
to me, for I owe my wile to the same
IN. B.—My wife's name is Jennie,
Caught the Panic,.
A tall, lank. Jerusalem sort of a fellow,
pretty well under the Influence of Mr. Al
cohol, was observed swinging to a lamp
post, on Fifth street. Hu was talkiqg
quite loualy to the aforesaid post, when a
guardian of the night approached him.
Come, sir, you are making too much
noise,' said the watchman.
',Noise ? who's that said noiso ?' asked
the post-holder, as he skewed his head and
endeavored in vain to give the intruder a
•It was me,' replied the watchman, as he
exposed his silver numbers to full view.
'You? who the d—l are you ? It taint
me that's makin of the noise. No, air. It's
the banks that's a makin all the noise.—
They are a breakin', a crushin', and a
amashin' of things to an incredible amount
Noise ? It's the bankers that are a makin'
of the noise. They are a cussin', a rip
pin', and a stavin' all 'round. It's the bro.
kers that are a makin' of the noise. They
are n hollerin' and a yelpin' and a screech
in', like wile injuns, over the times, that's
wors era everything but themselves. No,
sir, it aint me that's a makin' of the noise.'
'You are tight as a brick in a ne.v wall,'
said the officer. amused at the good nature
of the individual.
'Me tight ! Who said lam tight ? No,
sir, 3ou are mistaken. It's not me that's
tight. It's the money that's tight. Go
down on Third street and they'll tell you
there that money is tight. Go into the
workshops, and you find money-is tight.
Rend the newspapers and you'll find out
that it's money that's tight. .Me tight?
I've got nary red but Kanawha, and the
d--1 couldn't get tight on that. 'No, sir, I
am not tight.'
'Then you are drunk;'
'Drunk ? Stranger, yer out of it again.
The ,vorld's drunk. The hull community
is a staggerin' round, buttin' their heads
agin stone walls and a skinnin' of their no
ses on the curbstone of adversity. Yes,
sir, we're all drunk, that is, everybody's
drunk but me. I'm sober, sober as a po
lice judge on a rainy day. I aiat drunk ;
no, sir, stranger, I ain't drunk.'
'What are you making such a fool of
yourself for then ?'
'Fool? Sir, I'm no fool. I'm distressed.
I've catched the contagion. I'm afflicted.'
'Are you sick ?'
'What's the matter with you?'
'l've got the panics.'
rile panics, sir; it's going to carry off
but it's no use. The panics have got the
The watchman, more amused than ever
tendered his sympathy, and, what was bet
ter, his aid, to the panic.stricken individu•.
al. In the course of halt an hour he had
the pleasure of putting him into the door of
his boerding house, and pointing out to
him the best remedy -a good soft bed and
'Phis character of all others, is the very
meanest; he is what the cowardly assassin
is who masks himself, and then lies in wait
for his victim. The hypocrite is to be
found everywhere, you need not look far
to find him. Are you in the market house,
buying provender ? There is a hypocrite
selling to a hypocrite. The seller is try
ing to deceive the buyer, and vice versa.
You are in an omnibus and your neighbor
is a sanctimonious, sleek looking individu
al, and he is prying the affairs of an unso
phisticated "green un" opposite him, try
ing to pump him by conversing with him
upon a variety of reform topics. Are you
in the church ? Thut man who looks so
devout in his Sunday face and clothes, has
set more friends by the ears than he has
fingers and toes, and he loves to eo it.
The fellow who was talking politics to ynu
yesterday and led you to think he was
on your side is against you, and wished to
get some of your party secrets. Oh, hy
pocrisy ! oh, hypocrisy !
Bores beset our path. Perhaps every.
body bores somebody. There are rich
bores whom you can go t rid of by request
ing loans of twenty dollars, and poor bores
whom you can get rid of by loaning five
dollars ; literary bores, who smell of fresh
cut leaves ; statistical bores who are laden
with n heavy burden of facts; buttonhole
bares. v. ho always want about two minutes
of your time, and take about two hours ;
astonished bores, who start and ejaculate at
anything you may utter; funny bores,
who are fond of poking you in the ribs and
gastroinic regions; hypochondriocal bores,
who never laugh; musical bores, who are
overflowing with melody. The confirmed
whistler is a more positive infliction than
say we have enumerated. Almost every-
body can whistle and does whistle. Some
highly-blessed individuals have mouths
which will not pucker. We never meet
these favored creatures. When people
have nothing to do, they whistle, and
when overburdened with work, they whir.
tle. On the street the chorus of whistlers
is constant, emoracing every variety of
music, from a crazy jig to the last dying
moan of an operatic heroine. Small boys
on their way home from late shows, startle
the still air of the night with their piercing
melodies, But the whistler who can't
VOL. XXII. NO. 48.
help it, is the bore we fly from. His
mouth always wants to pucker, as it under
the influence of that very pungent pro
duct—a green persimmon. He is a com
plete and thorough musical enoycloptedia,
and is familiar with all tunes of ancient and
modern times. He executes a delicate
thrill, or prolonged note, in every pause in
a conversation. When entirely at ease,
he indulges in elaborate soles. His facile
mouth expands and contracts, his face ex
presses unmingled satisfaction, and if he
had a dear and most valued friendi in the
l a st extremity of financial embarrassment
and disaster, he would without the slight
est apparent concern, draw up his lips, and
whistle down the wind to prey at fortunt.
To Keep Cider Sweet.
In consideration of hard times and the
money panic, it behooves all who wish to
save anything, and then preserve it, to ob
serve all that has that objecting view. By
the use of the following receipt, cider can
be kept sweet for one year:—'Wash the
barrel very clean; then take five gallons
of clean boiling water and put it in the
barrel, bung it tight and shake it about to
drive all the air out of the wood of the bar
rel; then take the cider sweet from the
press, boil it quick and take the scum all
off it; empty the barrel, put it in a cold
cellar, put the cider in the barrel, boiling
hot; bung the barrel slack for one day;
then take a strong cloth and tar it over.
and put it over the bung hole; make a
bung the same way as the stave, and drive
it in very tight; then tar another rag, and
take a piece of tin larger than the bung
hole, lay on the rag and piece of tin, and
tack it down tight, and as long as the bar
rel is tight and cool the cider will keep
Mr An eccentric German was noted
(or his making and keeping good cider,
and for his extreme stinginess in dispensing
it to his neighbors when they called to see
uia fellow. and coax a pi'cher of cider out
of him. He made him a call, and praised
up his farm and cattle, and speaking of his
fine orchard, casually remarked :
'I hear, Mr. Von Dam, that you make
'Mesh, yeah, I dosh. Hans, bring de
The Yankee was delighted with his suc
cess, and already smacked his lips in anti
cipation of good things to come. Hane
brought up a quart jug of cider, and plac
ed it on the table before his father. The
old farmer raised it with both handd, and
glueing his lips to the brim, hedrained it
to the bottom, and then handing the empty
jug to the dry and thirsty Yankee, quietly
"Dare ! if you don't believe dat ish goot
cider, rhos% you sbmell to shug."
efir A gentleman who has been test.
ching for several years in one of our court.
try districts (Lebanon County) this fall
found that there was opposition to his be
ing again employed. He thereupon drew
up the following petition for his friends to
OCTOBER the 13th, A. D. 1857.
By this few lines I will draw up a list
about the No. 8 Scoolhouse. Now all the
inhapiters of School District can give me
their names.—All those in favor for me to
tench can put their names under yes, end
the contrary under no.
Mr Potter County, Pa , seven years
ago, had not an officer, high or low, but
'belonged to the Democracy.' Now, all
the officers, high and low, are Republi
cans. The Journal says that no man
shall have an office, there, who does not
believe in the Declaration of Indepen•
dence; the people have talked it all over.
and their deliberate, solemn conclusion is
to give the offices and honors at their die,
posal to outspoken, straight forward friend
, of Freedom, only.
fler A good old Quaker lady, alter Us.
tening to the extravagant yarns of a store
keeper, as long as her patience would al
low, said to him, "Friend, what a pity it
is n sin to lie, when it seems so necessary
to thy busineas."
110" 'MotherAeaid an inquisitive urch
in, a few days since. 'would you have
been .y relation to me if father had nev
er married you?'
err A brother editor, of this State, in
an appeal to hie patrons, says
' , The editor wants grain, pork, tallow.
candles, whiskey, linen, beeswax, wool,
and anything else he can eat."
mor An, editor, who was short of tray,
elling funds, sat upon a saw-horse for an
imaginary journey in the country, and
wrote letters home for his paper.