Huntingdon journal. (Huntingdon, Pa.) 1843-1859, June 10, 1857, Image 1

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- nu IR4DOIII
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WILLIAM BREWSTER, EDITORS,
9AM. 0. WHITTAKER,
eitct Vottrg.
ADDRESS TO FREEMEN.-
lIY JO3F.PII
Son 4 of Freedom, wake to glory I
Let no petty fed& divide you.
Let your names so live in story,
That no PATRIOT shall deride you,
Sons of Freedom I wake to ACTION,
Then your foes Ault doubly fear you,
Should you eatripate their faction,
Coming ages Allan revere you.
Yet ONE banner waves above you,
Though all else be trampled down,
Tit the flag that Freedom wove you,
Tin resistance to a crown!
grasping purse and sword together,
To their aid for power to ding—
Freemen I let me ask you whether,
This does rot define a King !
Hut his doom is last approaching—
Aye ! King Slavery's days are ntuniucreil,
Justice for hia sins repro:telling,
Tells hint that she only slumbered.
N'e l v the day foe ACTION nearetb,
Conquer now or COOVED never I
With a cause so just —who feareth ?
Meet them—ease THEM—and forever!
The Child and the Angela.
The Sahli:id; bull wan sitting slow
:.midst the clouds of even ;
Our FatheC—breathed a voice below,—
' Father, who art in beaven*:'
• Beyond the earth—beyond the cloud
Those infant words were given ;
Our Gather:'--angels sang aloud—
' Father, who art in Heaven r
'Thy kingdom come r —still!rota the
That childlike coke did pray ; [ground
Thy kingdom come r—(11 can hosts re•
Far up the :•tarry way
Thy will be done: -
'flint licping love implores;
with lilac tongue
api. iv shores,
tlin: , e lips repent
TLiir prayer ;
...• . .
r in touNie s, et
midst the angels ti:o; o :
~, c .lect *tot.)).
lasipE 1.1`.1
g@liffef.
Did you ever go n courtiii", niece, or to
court' One's about the same us Cattier.
There ain't but prrshus little to choose
ntwee6 the twe;any 'how you can fix it.
In one you have to be asked a powerful
site of impudent questions, and in t'other
you bare to ask the questions yourself.
So there ain't much difference in 'em, and
if you try both, you'll say just as I do.
About the matter of two years ago, John
Smith's cow broke Into Sam Jones' field
and marched jest as straight as her four
legs could carry 6cr into his turnip patch.
and eat up two turnip:3, tope end all.—
Jones he seed her, and he sot his yeller dog
on her, and the dog, (he's a savage critter)
bit a hole through her hind leg, and got
his brains kicked out to pay for it. Su
fur fonts and Smith were square, but
there was them turnips—Jones vowed he
wouldn't plant turnips for a well, able bo
died man's cow to eat up. and sed if Smith
didn't walk right over to his house and
settle the damage, he'd pros' cut him with
a writ. Smith is a dare devil sort of a fel
low, and he told him to "come nn," he
warn% aleord on him.
As it happened, I was out agoin' to the
Conferen's meetin' when the cow jumped
into the field, so I seed the hull performuns.
Jones he seed me, and knowd that I seed
the scr,p , , so lie. jilt gin me a little kin of
scrip blue paper, with somethin .
orful ecrawlin' on it. Cicero read it, and
land enuff to kilt himself.
'What upon airth is it, Cicero ?' Bei I
'lt ain't a buy letter, is it ?' sez I for old
Deacon Danis, (lost his wife about a year
afore,). had . looked erluld sharp at me the
day before, to afternoon meetin'.
'No, it ain't a luv letter,' sez he, 'but a
courtin' letter from Sam Jones.'
'A courtin' letter from Sam Jones ?' sez
I; 'why Sam Jones is a married man with
ten children and a baby ! What does he
want of more family I wonder ?'
don't want any more family as I
knows of,' said Cicero, but he wants you
to go to the Falls neat Thursday to court,
and tell what you seed John Smith's brin.
die cow do in his turnip field.'
'O, my gracious massy !' sec I, half
skeered at the idea of going to court. .1 .
can't go—it's my ironing day, and I ought
to make my apple sass that day too. I
can't go—you can jilt go over and tell na
tio'. Jones that I'd be glad to obleego him,
but !can't go a deal of onconveni
snce.'
'But niartn,l sex Cicero, folding up the
part, gills is a h horifl's or lawyer's sum-
1 mons, writ out of a big law book, and you
will either have to go or be carried to jail. -
That's the way they starve folks who don't
mind the law.'
'To jail! Hannah Tripe to jail!' sez I,
as indignant as I could be; 'l'll lam 'em
better works than to kerry an Innocent wo•
man to jail. 'l'll lay the broomstick over
'em if they come n•neer me.'
no use talking marm.' says Cicero
jYou'll have to go, and you might as well
be consigned to the levees of unalterable
fate ! The laws of yer country must be
minded ! The glorious country that the
Pilgrim Fathers fit and bled for ! you must
respect he , . commands!' And Cicero riz
hisself, and sot up his eyes and hands,
Ijest as I've seen Parson Sorapowell do
when lie's a giving out the malediction.
Well, I thought the matter over, and
concltided I'd better go to court; so I iron
ed on Tuesday, and made my apple sass
Wednesday. Thursday, nabor Jones come
over airly, and took me into his smart new
buggy to berry me to the falls. We had
I a site of talk about the cow and the dog
and the turnips while we were goin', and
by the time we'd drove unto the court
room, Jones had made up his mind that
he had beaten Smith for sartin.
I went into the great square room a
little flustratcd, I'll own; for there was the
sightest of folks there, blue eyes, grey eyes,
green eyes, black eyes, all fixed on Jones
and I its we marched up in front of the
I, judge
, Good mornin', Squire,' coo I, bowing
to a little, old, dried up nosed feller with a
ynller wig on. hope your honorable
health is good !'
'Keep quiet, Mrs. Tripe,' sez nabor
Jones, nudging my elbow, 'it ain't proper
to speak to his honor 'thout he asks ye
questions.'
They took me to a little platform built
up on cone side of the room, and sed
might sit down if I was a mind to—so
down I sot. My goodness! what funny
actions they aid have! Talking all sorts
u th a a c t !mill could
'revised statutes,' 'civil laws,' and nobody
,knows whnt. I declare I acully thought
,one spell, that Id been kerried clean back
ages and ages, to the tune when folks tal.
ked in Hebrew and whispered in Paddy.
heern Parson Scrapewell tell about it.
Byrne.by, arter I'd begun to feel hun
gry and want my dinner, a tall, scraggy
man, with green specs on his nose, riz up
and sez he
, Mrs. Hannah Tripe, stand up in your
seat.'
'Lord !' tez I. 'you don't want me to
climb up in a cheer afore all these folks,
do yet'
'We want none of your low jests here,'
sez he, coloring up till he look like a red
flannel nightgown ; 'rise up and stand !'
'O, yes,' sez I, 'l'd as liaf git up as not
—for my back begins to ache, I've sot an
!Ong: So I histod up, and looked round
on the ordinance.'
'liaise your right hand,' sez the tall
man, solemnly.
'lf you've no objections,' sea I, 'l'd ra
ther hint up my left one; my right hand
glove has got a stem' big hole right on the
palm of it !'
Everybody sot up a great lafl at this,
and the tall man turned into . a red agin.
'Order, order, gentlemen sez a pert
little fellow will a buckle on his hat and
a big bile on the end of his red nose, 'you
will be committed for contempt,' said he
speaking low to me.
'Thank you sir, for tellin' me,' sez I,
.but you're a little mistook I hain't got
the contempt, never had it, that I know of,
but I've had the influenzy bad enufl, so
bad—'
'Mr. Attorney, examine that woman
with despatch—the Court waits sez the
judge, tryin' hard to keep on his long face.
Raise your right hand and swear—'
never swear—it's wicked,' sex I, gi
ving him a look of disgust, a member
of the church swear ! The good Lord for
bid.' . .
.Never mind, toy good woman,' sez the
judge, 'say yes to what the gentleman will
read to you from the book—it will be suffi
cient, amply so.'
The tall man then took up the big
book and read out loud and ever so long a
a lot of gibberish that I didn't understand
then, and can't remember now, but it was
to the effect that I should tell everything
I knowed and nothing more, and swear
it was all true.
'Dear sake !' sez 1, 'it I've got to toll ev
erything I know, it'll take me a month or
two, and I should like to have some dinner
afore I begin.'
'You're not to tell anything except the
circumstances connected with the turnip
field of my client,' says the tall man pul•
ling away at his whiskers,
" LIBERTY AND UNION. NOW AND FORAYER, ONE AND INSEPARABLE."
UNTINGDON, PA., WEDNESDAY, JUNE 10, 1857.
'I don't know anything about yer olient,
sea I. '1 never seed it to the best of my
knowledge; it was Smith's cow that got
in the t trnip patch.'
, Did you see the defendent'a cow make
forcibly entrance into the plaintiff's enclo
sed field?' sez he, looking as grand as the
king of Independent Tartary.
'1 seed John Smith's cow jump into
Sam Jones' turnip yard, if that's what you
want to Oat,' sez 1.
'The same thing marm the same thing
only in different langwidge. Where were
you standing at the time of the occur.
rence ?'
.In the yard on my feet.'
'What color was the animal that you
saw vault over the fence? Could you
identify her from all other of the spa•
cies?'
'She was a brindle—a thread of red
dr and one of black.' sez I
'Describe her more fully,' sez he,
.She hap a head, two horns, two eyes,
one mouth, four legs and a tail,' sez L
'Did you see her with your own eyes
devour two turnips in the plaintiff
field!'
•'lVith my own eyes? To bo sure—
Whose eyes did you think I'd borrow-
'Could you swear it was turnips that
you saw her masticating.'
'I ain't gwine to swear anything about
it. She was eatin' soinethin' white but it
might have been white rocks, for anything
that I know.'
, Mrs. Tripe, how old are you V
None of your business !' sez 1, gettin'
out and out mad. am old enuff for you
any way, and you look as if you were
manufactured in the year one, and educa
ted in the ark r
The lawyer scratched his nose, and
looked like red flannel again, for all the
folks in the room lulled enuff to split them
selves.
'Go on with the examination' aez the
judge.
'Do you know my client personally ?'
his long rakish finger. •'• L
1 should think I ought to,' sez I nu....
'Fie court.d my main Tildy Brown, morn
two years, and got the mitten in the
end.'
Tners 'was a great 101 l agin, and callin'
out for 'order, order, order,' and that only
made 'em laff the louder. Jest at this
minis up jumped a little humbly, red faced
man, that had been talking with John
Smith ever so long in a whisper, and stick•
in' his thumbs into the armholes of his
vest, sez he—. Allow me to nsk the wit
ness a fear questions your honor.
The judge bowed, and the red-faced
man went on--
Mrs, Tripe, you say you know Mr.
Jones—do you know my client, Mr. John
'Yes,' sez I.
'What do ye know of him,' eez he.—
'State the good you know of him, if you
please.'
don't know any good of him,' sea I.
'He robbed my hen roost, last spring, of
the best pallet nod the handsomest crow
er I had in the flock. That's the most I
know of him any way,'
'The witness may sit down,' sez the
judge, takin' out his handkerchief and pre
tendin' to blow his nose, though it's my
opinion he was trying to keep from laugh
ing.
A madder feller than Smith you never
seed ; hut they wouldn't let him say a
word, and I twiny 'Veered he'd bust, he
was so full of bilin' hot rage agin me,
There were a great deal of talkin' and
disputin' in the room—and arter awhile
the jury sed they'd decide the case.
One of the juryman stood up and sed
he thought Smith's cow hadn't no business
to jump into Jones' yard and devour two
of bib turnips.
Another of 'em got up and Bed he
knowed the cow hadn't ort jump in, but
the turnips had no business to look so
temptin,' and for his part ho thought the
turnips was full as much to blame as she
was.
Another of 'em and that Jones ought
to pay Smith for his cow killing his dog,
for the dog, he sed, was the ugliest critter
upon the face of the airth.
The judge sent 'em all otf on! intor an•
other roam to make up their minds what
they'd do—and we sot as still an mice
i svaitin' (or 'em to cum back. Byrne by
the door opened and in they cum—twelve
of 'em, two and two, and sot down.
'Gentlemen of the jury," aez the judge
"have you arrived at a conclusion?'
All of 'jilt bowed their heads sauna.
Iy.
'Who shall speak for you," says he,
lookin' as iodignitied as an owl in a holler
tree,
I 'Our foreman, Mr, Antipedes,' sez they
with one voice.
Mr. Antipedes riz up, slow and steady,
jist as you've seen ''ern hist up rocks with
a derrick, as if he was afeered if he'd si
dle over a mite he should sprawl himself
on the floor. Antipedes is an orefu I grate
man, and his heed is the biggest part of
him—rather top heavy, ye see.
'May it please yer honor, and the court
at large,' sez he, rolling his eyes round
and round, till they looked like two great
dirty snow balls sliding down a hill, , we
have decided that John Smith give to Mr.
Samuel Jones the sum of two turnips, as
the amount of damage done the latter by
the excursion of the former's cow into the
plaintiff's primises
There was considerable laffin in court
arter this, and one (oiler hollered 'order !'
so much and so loud that they sed it was
a fact he couldn't speak out loud (or a
week afterwards.
Mr Jones give me fifty cents for my
services and brought me home safe.
Smith paid him the two turnips, and
they (not the turnips) are as good friends
as ever.
Since that scrape, if ever I see a cow
that looks as if she was ngwine to jump in
anywhere, I jist turn my back to Ler and
say--Go ahead!'
I,liscrliang.
The Dred Scott Decision Applied.
Slamming the last door of the first car,
and opening that of the second, the "gen
tlemanly conductor" of the New York
train made his appearance with bis bow
and smile, and ""Tickets, gentlemen if you
please."
Seated in the front corner, surrounded
by personal conveniences, such as a car
pet bag, umbrella, big bundle, little bundle
a few apples and pieces of cake, was a co
lored lady, whose lace—the hue of an in
veiled saucepan, contrasting with her
snow white ivory and eyeballs gave that
ikaMv,q Himess ion wit ich is so
gmgr nature.
with civility regardless of complexion. I
'1 hasn't got 'mu.' she replied, but I'se
gist money, any way' ; and she began to
fumble in her bag, then in the bundles,
searching these articles through in vain.
'Come hurry up,' exclaimed her now
impatient friend ; .1 can't wait all day.'
'Dress yer soul, yer don't think I find
everything in a minute, but rue got inon
ey somewhar—must be in die yeah cawpet
bag,' end she felt in her pocket according.
ly fur the key.
'Well, well, I'll pass through and when
I get back perhaps you will have it ready.'
'Yes, sartin,' said Dinah ; but as he
passed along she reached out her umbrel
la, and giving him a poke upon the shout•
der, asked, 'What you g'wain to charge on
freight?'
'Freight ! what do you want to know
that for ?"
'Cause I does ; Fse civil ain't 1 ?'
'Well, five coma a foot ; there, don't
bother me any more, but find your money';
and he went his way.
There seemed to be a peculiar drollery
about the lady's eye and mouth, as the one
rolled around in its black sea of flesh, the
other opened to give vent to an involuntary
'ph ! ha !" It was not long now before
she found her purse, and withdrew some
coin, which she kept jingling in her hands
as she kept up her occasional cacehina
dons.
In due time the conductor returned for
his money. and upon extending his itching
palm, was astonished at receiving the pre
cis° sum of ten cents.
1% hat do you mean?' he exclaimed.—
el'he fare to New York is five dollars.'
..Yas, yas, I knows dat, for white folks
—folks what am folks—but Inc nobody ;
l'se freight, I is. Yah, ynh!—Poor rule
as don't work bof ways ; five cents a feet,
heah day is!' said she, extending a pair
of enormous ambulamrs for the inspection
of the conductor and us all. •
The nonplussed functionary stood unde
termined for a moment amid the shouts of
the passengers, until on idea of Compro
mise occurred to hint, as he exclaimed
Well, if you are freight, take yourself uff
into the baggage car.' But even there Di
nah was too much for him, as she re•
plied..Jete you piok up your freight if you
want to cair um off!"
This settled the.point.. The conductor
vanished, and Dinah offered a pious eject*.
!won : brass dat ur 'Preino Court,
and gut 'emu credit For a five dollar bill any
w•ay
1111 r Why it; a igwardly soldier like
butter 1 Because he is sure to run when
he ii expuzed to fire
,110
How Railroads Injure Farmers.
Not long sinoe a farmer from our State
was bitterly complaining of a railroad to
one who wee connected with the manage
ment of the road. 'Why,' said tile farmer,
'I was fool enough to take stock to the
amount of hve hundred dollars, and I have
lost every cent of it. And, besides, the
cursed thing runs through my farm '
'And has greatly injured it, I suppose,'
added the other, smiling and looking the
farmer full in the face.
'lnjured it!' replied the farmer. 'To
be sure it has. Why do you ask such a
foolish question ?'
'Bow much damage were you paid by
the corporation !' naked the other.
'ln the neighborhood of six hundred dol
lars,' replied the farmer. 'But it was not
half enough,'
'Of course not,' added the railroad man,
smiling. 'But permit me to ask you ano
ther question. What would you have sold
your farm for a dozen years ago ?'
was once offered twenty•five hundred
dollars.' replied,' replied the farmer.
'And what can you sell it for now!' in•
quired the other.
The fainter scratched his head ;and af
ter some hesitation, confessed he had been
recently ofiered four thousand dollars.
'Just as I expected,' was the reply of
the other. 'Now let us figitre up a mo
ment, if you please. You have lost hve
hundred in the stook, and received for land
damages six hundred, and the railroad has
added to the price of your land, according
to your own showing, fifteen hundred, so
that you fairly owe the railroad sixteen
hundred dollars. Am I right ?'
The farmer was compelled to confess he
had made money out of the railroad, not.
withstanding he had lost five hundred dol
lars in the original stoc... Thus it is, and
what shell we say of the croaking farmers,
who nev,r pain a cent for the making of
the road, and whose farms have been near
ly doubled in value by it? There are
hundreds of such, and yet :bey are con.
smutty heaping curses upon railroads and
munagement.
Again there is darkened chamber in
ginia. Two of the same name werefrom •
Massachusetts, and the seventh from Ten. ces are subdued and sad. o,uietly upon
h
nesse, All but one were sixt y-six years his little couch he lies and suffers. The
old on leaving office, having served two sweet lips utter no moan; the gentle fea.
terms; and one of them, who had served lures evidence no pain; and it seems as
but one term, would have teen sixty six though angels soothed him into silence.
years of age at the end of another.—
, Again the twilight comes; again the stars
Three of the seven died on the Fourth of
shine out; but there is no joy now in the
house, and the prayers of thanksgiving
July, and two of theta on the same day
are turned to supplications for mercy, to
and year. Two of them were on the
sub committee of three that drafted the pleading at the throne of grace to apace
Declaration of Independence, and these the loved one yet a little while.
Morning dawns, and there is a coffin in
two died on the same day and year, and
the house* A little narrow box, not two
on the nniversary of the Declaration of In
feet long ! listed in white, with flowers
dependance, and just half a century from
among his golden hair, and waxen hands
the day of the Declaration. The names .
of the three of the seven ended in son folded over the heart that is still forever,
,
l
yet neither of these trltsmitted his name lies the dead babe. Oh, the aching hearts
that bend over him ; oh, the hot tears that
to a son. In respect to the names of all,
it stay be said in conclusion, the initials of fall down upon the flowers and golden
hair! How they tell of earthly love and
two of the 'wren were the same : and two
the frailty of earthly things ! Flow they
others that they were the same. 'file re
tell of hollow human hopes and the mock
(naming one who stands alone in this par
ery of mortal trust ! In the very room
ticular, stands alone also in the love and
where he was born, they close the coffin
admiration of his countrymen and the civ
lid andyield him back, dust to'dust, earth
ilized world-•—WASHINGTON ! Of the fir..t
five, only one had a son, and that son was to earth, ashes to ashes.
also president. Days .d months roll away. Time, the
consoler ha; laid a healing hand upon the
broken hearts nf those who loved the child
and they have learned the great lesson
the Labe was sent to teach. The tendrils
of the young vine, though faded, still re•
tam their clinging hold upon their mem
ory and their love; but out in the green
graveyard stands a pure white monument,
never forgotten, and never passed by with-
out a tear, which points its pale finger to
the blue skies, and whispers, "Lay for
yourselves treasures in Heaven."
Our Homes.
Genius hnth its triumph, fame its glo
ries, wealth its splendor, success its bright
rewards, bui the heart only hath its home.
Home only ! What more needeth the
heart? What more can it gain ? A true
home is more than the world—more than
honor, and pride, and fortune—more than
all earth can give—the light, the noonday
sun may not yield, and yet the tiny flame
'of one pure beam of love enkindleth, and
sympathy makes to burn forefrer.
Home! how more beautiful thou art!
how like en untaught religion a golden
link between the soul and heaven ! when
the presence of a pure heart makes thee
radiant, and the music of its aflectton floats
like the chorale of unseen cherubims a
round thy tranquil hearth.
Taney we Burnside.
At the late term of our Circuit Court,
John Boyer a negro, applied for license
to sell groceries cite , which was granted
by Judee Burnside.
The lees of the State forbids the gran
ting el tiny license to persona who are
not citirms. Judge Taney in his lute de
cision in the Dn-d Scott case decied that
negroes and mula.toes were not citizens,
but citatt les. things, property Ac., and out
side of the pule ol the law. But Judge
Burnisida by thin act has decided other
wise. Which is correct, Burnside or
'Taney? As they ore both Democrats.
will some of our professed Democrats be
kind enough to inform us.—Lock Harm
Watchman.
Judge Burnside, in our bumble opinion
tuna right end Taney wrong,
THE LITTLE ONE. A Singular Discovery.
'There is a darkened chamber in the In 1852, a Lew grains of wheat wet
house. Over the windows of that room discovered in the tombs of some men
the thick eurtins sweep downward heavily ' mien found in the south of France sun,
and the sunshine and the daylight are ex- 1 sed to have been two thousand years cid
eluded, Soft voices mingle in gentle ca- ; These grains of Egyptian wheat were
dencea there, and softer toot-falls across the planted, and produced to ihe surprise •
covered floor. There are no loud tones, no every one, 1,200 to 1 ! The Uovernmer.•
harsh sound. A hush and halo rest there, took the affair in hand, and conaigned 1...,
like the soft drooping of an angel's wing. management of it to farmers of the Gu , •
Close pressed to a heart awakened to a new eminent farm at Rambouillet. The rm..:
fount of jay it never knew or dreamed of has been moat astonishing. Each year
before, hes a little babe. Only the young 'he product has been magnified in due/
mother feels the blessing and the responsi- , an immense proportion over the preceding
Imlay of the precious boon ; and in the year, that the Minister of Agriculture is
shadowy room she lies and thinks of the now enabled to distribute over France a
little God-gift on her bosom ;of the world large quantity of this wheat to each iit
untried, the path untrod, which. lie before the departments gratuitously, with instruc
the portal of life it has just crossed. Tears Lions from the Government farm as to Ow
of love and feeling rain down ui.on the lit- best mode of cultivation. At a late meet
tle brow, as she thinks in what way is the ing of the Academy of Sciences, the 8.8
world to try this pure young spirit, arid roil de Menneville presented several awe!,
whose hand will safest guide it over the un. of this regenerated Egyptian wheat whic.i
trodden way ! The twilight comes, and were six feet high and bore several So
the stars shine out, and a benediction and ears. A French lady explained in tn;
a prayer sway like heavenly pinions over hearing the other day, this great multiply
the gently pillowed head of the newborn; ing power of the Egyptian wheat by ti,
while through the house a new light shines long rest it has had ! It is a great a•
and manhood's brow grows brighter, and important study of agriculturists,
woman's eye grows softer, and under the
Fugitive Slaves in Ohio.
roof tree of home they t'rejoice wit:, ex-1
needing great joy," for a little one is there .
Spring has come, hod the babe, a bright
and pretty prattler now, is out among the
flowers. [he eye of affection watches
him anxiously, for the lily disputes posses•
sion with the rose on that cheek arid tie
blue eye, soft as a dew laden violet isslifTd
often to the far off skies, as if it knew its
home w•as there. Slightly the little feet
patter upon the stairs, sweetly the little
voice sings through the house, and the
mother's heart melts with tearful delight
in listening to it. Out on the turf the-fa•
ther lies down in the shade of the summer
sunset, and like a child himself plays with
his babe, and clasping his treasure to his
manly beast, feels his eye grow moist with
the dew of affection, and thankfulness to
God for his glorious gift,
Kr. A Frenchman being troubled with
the gout, was asked what difference there
was beiwet , n the gout and rheumatism.
'Abs von ver grande deeferance,' replied
Monsieur; 'you take unto you von vice,
put de linger in, you turn de screw till
you can bear him no longer—ver vel, dat
is de rheumatism; den s'pose you give
him one turn inore—dat is de gout.'
J'An aristocratical young man from
up the river was asked the other night if
he danced. He said 'Yes, but I've about
given it up.' We asked why? He re
plied : 'The reason is simply this I have
lived in Albany for the last three years;
attended a great many balls there—but
quit going all at once upon discovering
that in nine cases out of ten, I would see
the ladies I. had danced with the night be
fore. by some cingular metamorphic, scrub
bing front steps, or side walks the nest
morning, consequently, I've concluded to
attend no more balls, at least in Albany !.
VOL. XXII. NO. 23
iA Serious Conflict between State al,'
Federal officers has occured in Green co ,
Ohio. A Deputy Marshal of the United
States, with eleven assistants, went from
Cincinnati, on Tuesday, to arrest four per
, sons Champaign county, on a charge c.!
harboring fugitive slaves nine mouths
The arrests were made on Wednesday,
when a writ of habeas corpus was precu•
red, but before it could be served the Mar
shal had got out of the county. Another
writ was procured in Green county, and
served by the Sheriff. The Martial resist
ed. and several shots were fired ; but the
United States officers were at last over
powered, taken prisoners, and conveyed
to Springfield for trial, on the charge ui
resisting the Sheriff while in the perform
ance of his duty. The affair very natu
' rally created intense excitement.
Secretary of the Interior, on applicatie”
. of the_Un,ited Slates Marshal at Cincinii,
District Court,os
bees corpus to bring the arrested officer,
before. at Cincinnati. Should resistance
be offers, it is said the government troops
, will be ordered out,
QuEE . 4I U
I,ATIONSIII P.—lt is said tiler,
is a widower in Camden, N. J.,•who re
cently married a young girl, and soon after
his son by n former wife, married his fa
ther's wife's mother. In consequence of
these two centections, a father became the
son-in law of his son, and the wife not on
ly the daughter,n-law of her own son-in.
law, but still snore, the mother in-law of
her own daughter; while the husband et
the latter is the father-in-law of his own
mother-in-law to his own father. Singular
confusion may arise, if children should
aiming from these peculiar marriages.
Throwing away an ,9ppelite.-1
stranger, dining with a party at a hotel,
had helped himself to the first dish of
meat that stood near him, and being hun
gry, and making no calculation as to tits
choicer dishes that were to follow, begat:
to eat his slices of the plain dish with
great gusto and voracity. 'Och an sure,'
said an Irishman opposite, 'ye don't intend
to throw away such a beautiful appetite
upon one dish !'
111111' Never marry it man until yor
have seen him eat. Let the candidate
your hand pass through the ordeal of es
Ling soft boiled eggs. If he can do it on:
leave the table spread, the napkin, and h:
shirt unspotted—take him, Try him nea
with a spare-rib. If be accomplishes thi.,
feat without putting out one of his ow
eyes, or pitching the bones in your lap,
name the wedding.day at once; he will
do to tie to.
LOVE'S STRATAGEM —The Shippensburg
Pa. Democrat relates a pretty little row
once of real life, the parties in ehich were'
two young Germans in humble life. Ts:•
young men formed an attachment for Iw'
young maidens in their fatherland, and d.
sired to marry. The young women tee
procated the tender regard and were wil
ling to marry the swains. But the pares,
were not satisfied with the standing of tl:•
daughters' lovers, and refused consent '•
was then agreed between the parties the
the young men should come to Aineric
' earn money sufficient to pay the fare
their sweethearts, and then send for their .
the girls agreeing faithfully to follow the:-
lovers. The young men found employ
meat near Shippensburg. saved their ay
ney, and last fall sent for their betrothed
They came promptly, without the conivtr. ,
or knowledge of their parents, and a I", ,
days since were clasped in their tore',',
arms, as they descended Iron
the Shippensburg depot.