VOL. 18,
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I Would not die in Spring Time.
BY DAVID P.KUI,
I would not die in. Spring time,
When the buds begin to blow,
When the ambient air sheds fragrance
And the heart is in it's glow.
When the birds in nature's instinct,
Pour forth their melody,
And bright creation beams with love,
Almighty One to Thee.
I would not die in Summer.
When the flowers are in their bloom,
When health and joy and happiness
Shrink from the dreary tomb.
When the blossom's on the peach tree,
And the fields are rich and gay:
When the bosom throbs with gratitude,
And sorrow's far away.
I would not die in Winter,
When all the world is chill;
When the storm king's icy fingers
Lock up the purling rill.
When the tress are stripp'd of foliage,
And all their glories gone,
When dreariness and sorrow
Prevade the scene alone.
I would not die in Autumn.
With the falling withered lent
When the earth is clothed in sadness,
And the heart attun'd to grief.
I'd stretch me 'neath the umber tree,
The emblem of decay—
And full of faith, dear Lord, in Thee,
There, breathe my soul away.
The Angel of Patience.
To weary hearts, to mourning homes ?
God's meekest angel gently comes;
No power has he to banish pain,
Or give us back our lost again;
And yet, in tenderest love, our dear
And heavenly Father sends him here.
There's quiet in that angel's glance.
There's rest in his still countenance;
He mocks no grief with idle cheer,
Nor wen nds with words the mourner's ear;
But ills and woes he may not cure,
He kindly helps us to endure.
Angel of patipicel sent to calm.
Our feverish brow with cooling balm;
To lay the storms of hope and fear,
And reconcile life's smile and tear:
And throbs of wounded pride to still,
And make our own our Father's will !
0 ! thou who znournest on thy way,
With longings for the close of day.
He walks with thee, that angel kind.
And gently whispers, "Be resigned I"
Bear up. bear on; the end shall tell,
The good Lord ordereth all things well I
1EM(g211251200.
History of the Bible.
DT TIM REV. MARCER Mint
The first writings of which we have an ac
count, were performed with a stylus or steel pen,
by which letters were engraved on hard sub
stances. Writing was first made on the bark
of trees, leaven and parchment and thin plates
of brass and iron. Even the original meaning
of paper, papyrus, is n shrub of whose leaves
were made clothes, mats, ropes, sails and pa
per. The 'Bible was Written on parchment.—
The parchment. was written on one side, and
rolled up in'the form of n scroll. This scroll
was kept as a most choice deposit, and one por
tion after another was added by the sanction of
the Jewish Sanhedrin, who cautiously examin
ed thettuth.ority and truth of every pretended
prophet. This accounts for the want of order
in the arrangement of hooks in the Hebrew
text; Chronicles, not Malachi, is the last book
in the Hebrew Bible. The inspired Ezra die
covered that there was an important period in
the history of the Jews left out, and he supplied
it. But he must add it to the scroll, without
respect to the order of time. The translators
discovered this, and wisely put it back in its
proper place. The fathers called Chronicles
the Book of Books, the Book of things left out.
This form of the Jewish manuscripts shows us
the reason of their writing from the right hand
to the left, or as we should nay of beginning it
back where it should end, and ending a book
where it should begin. It was more convenient
tq unroll the parchment as you read. The sn
ored writings used in the synagogue, and these
used in private' families, were not always in the
same form. Families often used them in the
form of sheets. _ _ _
The Samaritans, who separated from the Jews
in the reign of Rehoboam, in A. M. 3029, had
only the Pentateuch—the five books of Moses.
_As they were separated from Israel, they were
deprived of the writing of the prophets. The
Saviour probably alluded to tins limited or de.
fective volume of theirs, when He said to the
woman of Samaria, Ye worship, ye know not
what; we know what we worship, for Salvation
is of the Jews—or salvation is more clearly re
vealed to the Jews, in those books which have
been written since you separated from the Jews.
The Samaritan Pentateuch, though written in
different characters, is the same as that of the
Hebrews. The mode and materials of the an.
dent writings made them very scarce and very
tOt poll Cyr .
Ake bcgcags whirl (VI gave .s , 3Aut in
- ':,t ittuntino'on
" I SEE NO STAR ABOVE TILE NORIZON, PROMISING LIGHT TO 017IDE HS, NUT THE INTELLIGENT, PATRIOTIC, UNITED WHIG PARTY OP TJIE UNITED STATES."-EWEENTE;
the garden was undoubtedly Hebrew.,
Though the word Hebrew was derivettfrom
the word Heber, meaning "to pass over," and
was applied to Abraham, because he passed
over the Euphrates to enter into Canaan, yet it
is probable that this is the language God used
with our first parents in the garden, for this is
the most ancient of languages; it is incorpora
ted into almost all languages, and from it many
of them are formed. Many of the Eastern lan
guages are descendants from the Hebrew, and
are therefore called kindred languages, or lan
guages which are a corruption of the Hebrew.
From the age of Moses to that of David, has
hems considered the golden age of the Hebrew
language. The reign of Hesekiah, which ad.
mitted some foreign words, was the silver age.
13st the commercial and civil intercourse of the
Jews, their foreign colonies and their captivi
ties, corrupted their language, and created nu
merous idioms. it is probable that the forms
of the Hebrew letters have changed in different
periods. •
The Old Testament, then, was written in He
brew; the New Testament was written in Greek,
the pure and popular language of the first cen
turies of the Christian era. But if the writers
were Jews, they retained the Hebrew style, and
in some instances used the Hebrew words. it
is therefore sometimes called Hebrew Greek,
and sometimes called Hellenistic Greek, and
it was the Greek language used by the Jews
and with Hebrew idiots].
The Greek manuscripts, like the 17ebrew,
were written in different forms of letters--some
uncial and some cursive—some in entire capi
tals. and others in ordinary letters. They had
no chapters, verses, stops, or marks, rand no di.
visions to works. I ought here to remark that
though writers of manuscripts were very cauti
ous and very correct in copying, yet there are
occasional mistakes in orthography. And yet
they passed down century after century without
any essential perversion—while the works of
the learned Greeks, after two or three copied
editions, were pronounced unworthy of their
authors, and consigned to oblivion. As was
natural and almost inevitable, some mann.
scripts were deemed more correct than others,
and were therefore regarded as standard man
uscripts. This gave rise to three great fami
lies, or as they called them, revisions. The
number of Greek manuscripts is about 500.
In looking over these manuscripts, we find
some of them have an affinity to each other.—
In the third century there were considered to
be two families, and subsequently there was
another added. These recensions are called
the Alexandrine or Egyptian the Occidental
or western recension—or the one adopted by
Italy, Spain, &c.; the Byzantine or Oriental,
because it was generally used at the East. or
at Constantinople. There has been the Eden
sene, or Syriac fatally, added. Where all these
witnesses unite, the testimony is of the highest
Lind; where a majority agree it is good, and
where they differ, respect must be had to the
character of the witnesses, and to preferences
which one may claim over another.—N. York
Evangelist. .
God's Tenderness.
How soothing in the hour of sorrow. .or be.
reavernent, or death, to have the countenance
and the sympathy of a tender earthly friend 1
My soul! there is one nearer, dearer, tenderer
still—the friend that never fails, a tender God.
By how many endearing epistles does Jesus
exhibit the tenderness of His affection to His
people I Does a shepherd watch tenderly over
his flock? "The Lord is my shepherd!" Does
a father exercise fondest solicitude toward his
children ? "I will be a father unto you!"—
Does a mother's love exceed nil earthly types
of affectionate tenderness? "As one whom his
mother comforted), so will I comfort you!" Is
the apple of the eye the most susceptible part.
of the most delicate bodily organ? "He keeps
them as the apple of the eye!" "He will not
break the bruised reed !" "When the shepherd
and bishop of souls" finds a sinner like a lost
sheep stumbling on the dark mountains, how
tenderly he deals with him 1 There is no look
of wrath, no word of upbraiding; in silent love
"He lays him on his shoulder, rejoicing I"
When Peter falls, he does not unnecessarily
wound hint. He might have repeated often and
again the piercing look which brought the flood
of penitential sorrow. But he gave that look
only once; and if he reminds again of this three.
fold denial, it is by thrice repeating the gen
tlest of questions, "Lovest thou me?" The
gentlest earthly parent may speak a harsh word
betimes; it may be needlessly harsh, but not so
with God. "He may seem, like Joseph to his
brethren, to speak roughly; but all the while
there is love in his heart!" The furnace will
not burn more fiercely than is absolutely re•
quired. A tender God is seated by it, temper.
ing the fury of the flames.—Religions Herald.
One Happy Heart.
Have you made one happy heart to-day?—
Envied privilege. How calmly can you seek
your pillow! how sweetly sleep I In all this
world there is nothing so sweet as giving com
fort to the distressed, as getting a sun ray into
a gloomy heart. Children of sorrow meet us
wherever we turn; there is no moment that
tears are not shed, and sighs uttered. Yet how
many of those tears, those sighs, are caused by
our own thoughtlessness! How many a daugh
ter wrings the very soul of a fond mother by
acts of unkindness and ingratitude! How ma
ny husbands, by one little word, make a whole
day of sad hours and unkind thoughts! How
many wives, by angry recriminations, estrange
and embitter their loving hearts! How many
brothers and sisters meet but to vex and injure
each other, making wounds that no human
heart can heal! 'AI,. if each one worked upon
this maxim day by day—"strive to make some
heart happy"—jealousy, revenge,madness, hate,
with their kindred evil associates, would forever
leave the earth. Our minds would be so occu
pied in tire contemplation of adding to the
pleasures of others, that there would be no
more room for the ugly fiends of discord. Try
it, ye discontented, forever-grumbling devotees
of sorrow, self-caused; it will make that little
part of the world in which you move as f a i r as
Eden.
tar You may persuade a man that ho is a
wit or a sage—a philosopher or a philanthro-
pist; but you might as well undertake to cross
the Atlantic in a tea-cup as to make him be.
lieve he is a fool. Skeptics are advised to ex
periment upon the stupidest friend they have.
ma- Choose your assoriates from among the
wile sod good. If you eon not do this it is
snttor to !,are
HUNTINGDON, PA., WEDNESDAY, DECEMIIER 7, 1853.
Dew.
Q. What dew?
A. Dew is the vapor of the air condensed by
coming in contact with bodies colder than it•
self.
Q. Why is the ground sometimes covered
with dew?
A. Because the surface of the earth (nt sun•
set) is made so very cold by radiation, that the
warm vapor of the air is chilled by contact and
condensed into dew.
Q. What is the difference between dew and
rain
— A. In dew, the condensation is made near
the earth's surfare.
In rain, the drops fall from a considerable
heieht.
Q. What is the cause of both dew and rain?
A. Cold condensing the vapor of the air
whet near the point of saturation.
Q. Why do mist and fog vanish at sunrise?
A. Because the condensed particles arc
again changed into invisible vapor by the heat
of the sun.
Q. Why is the earth made colder than the
air after the sun has set?
A. Because the earth radiates heat very free.
ly, but the air does not; in consequence of
which, the earth is often five or ten degrees
colder than the air, (after sun•set;) although it
was much warmer than the air during the
whole day.
Q. Why is the earth warmer than the air dux ,
ing the day ?
A. Because the earth absorbs solar heat very
freely, but the air does not; in consequence of
which, it is often many degrees warmer than
the air, during the day. _
Q. Why is the surface of the ground colder
in a fine clear night than a cloudy day?
A. Because, on a fine, clear star-light night,
heat radiates from the earth fieely, and is lost
in open space; but on a dull night, the clouds
arrest the process of radiation.
Q. Why is dew deposited only on a fine,
clear night ?
A. Because the surface of the ground radi
ates heat most freely on a fine night; and (be
ing cooled down by this loss of heat) chills the
vapor of the air into dew.
Q. Why does abundance of dew in the morn
ing, indicate that the day will be fine?
A. Because dew is never deposited in dull,
cloudy weather, hut only in very clear, calm
nights; when the cold currents of air aro not
mixed with those of a warmer temperature.
Q. Why is there no dew on a dull, cloudy
night? . . . .
A. Becanse the clouds arrest the radiation of
heat from the earth; and (as the heat cannot
freely escape) the surface is not sufficiently
cooled down to chill the vapor of the air into
dew.
Q. Why is a cloudy night warmer than a fine
ono?
A. Because the clouds prevent the radiation
of heat from the earth; in consequence of which
the surface of the earth remains warmer.—
From "Familiar Science," edited by R. E. Pe.
Jerson.
A Touching Incident
A little irish girl, say; the Willimantic Me
dium, perhaps twelve years old, was in the De
pot of our village last Tuesday afternoon, just
atter the arrival of the trains, all alone and cry
ing. The poor child was forlorn-looking enough.
Some ladies noticed her, and kindly inquired
into her trouble. The little girl said that she
did not know where to find her father. He
was in Willimantic, but the poor simple child
had not the slightest notion how to proceed to
find him. She held an open letter in her hand,
dated at this village, from her father, disclos
ing his name, and remitted money to defray
her expenses.
The child had come all the way from Ire
land alone, ns we afterwards learned from her
father, and she had just then arrived in our
village by the cars. One of our citizens was
on the point of taking her with him to some of
our country people, to inquire her father out,
when a woman put her head in at the door, and
with body half bent, looked slowly and search.
ingly around. Her eye fell upon the little
stranger. She darted like an arrow, and clasp.
her in her arms as if she 'would squeeze the
child's breath out of her, she burst out in a loud
cry of the most passionate joy. No ono needs
to be told that she was the child's mother.
We had supposed that there was no mother
in the case, as we understood that the poor lit
tle creature spoke only of her father; but we
did not ask if that woman were the mother, af
ter witnessing such a meeting. We have seen
acting on the stage aril off, but never so effee.
ting a stroke of pathos was produced by nrt, as
the simple outburst of this mother's affection
over her darling child. The ladies present in
stantly acknowledged its power with their tears.
The mother and daughter had been separated
about three years. When we left the Depot
the overjoyed mother had her child on her lap,
kissing her and folding her to her bosom by
turns, and pouring out with her tears the most
tender expressions of love and joy. It was a
beautiful and surpassingly touching sight.
Sodom and Gomorrah.
We see it stated that a certain Monsieur de
Sauley, n member of the French Institute, ac
companied by several other intelligent gentle.
men, succeeded, in 1850—'51, in finding the
ruins of Sodom and Gomorrah—"not under
the troubled and infected waters of the salt in.
land lake, so erroneously set down ns being at
once their shroud and sepulchre, but on the
shores and in the valleys where they originally
stood, and where he and his companions look•
ed upon, and rode amongst their widely.exten
ded remains, lying, as they were overthrown,
blasted by the fire of Heaven and scattered in
awful desolation."
Who knows anything as to the truth of the
above statement? To us it seems a little of a
piece with the story of the sailor who fished up
from the fled Sea, a wheel of Pharaoh's chari•
ot. if such ruins are there, of course they are
the remains of Sodom and Gomorrah—but we
never remember tohave rind of their being
there bcfore..
itanling Down an'Enemy's Colors.
Admiral Hopson entered the English Navy
in 1680, as a common boy, and thus first dia•
tinguished himself;
The ship and fleet in Which ho was embark
ed, then on the point of sailing, soon fell in
with a French squadron, and in a few hours of
ter the boy's entry into the service, a warm Fic
tion was commenced, which was maintained on
both aides with equal bravery. During this
time, young Hopson obeyed his orders with
great alacrity; but, after fighting some hours,
he became impatient for the result, and inquir
ed when it would be over. On being told the
action would continue until the white flag at
the enemy's mast head was struck, he exclaim•
ed, "Oh, if that's all, I'll see what I can do."--
At this moment the ships were engaged yard
arm and yard-arm, and obscured in the smoke
of the guns. Our hero,.taking advantage of
this circumstance, determined to haul down the
enemy's colors. He accordingly mounted the
shrouds, and from the main-yard gained that
of the French ship, unperceived by any of the
crew; and, ascending with agility to the main
topgallant masthead, he struck and carried
off the French flag, with which he retreated to
his own ship. Before lie had regained the deck
the British shouted victory, without any other
cause than that the enemy's flag had disap
peared.
The crew of the French ship, thrown
into confusion by the same circumstance, and
believing that her colors had been struck by
order, ran from their guns; and, although the
French Admiral and officers, who were equal
ly surprised at tho event, endeavored to rally
them, it was a vain attempt, for the British
tars seized their opportnity, boarded the vessel,
and took her. At this juncture, Hopson de
scended the shrouds with the French flag round
his arm, and displayed it triumphantly to the
the sailors, who received the prize with the ta
ll most astonishment. nibs heroic action reach
ing the quarter-deck, Hopson was ordered to
attend there, and the Admiral, praising his
gallantry, ordered him to he rated as a mid
shipman, telling him that upon his future con
duct depended his patronage and protection.
Where "Good Society" May be Found.
N. P. Willis, in reply to a lady correspondent
who asks about society in his vicinity, says:
Without seeing you, and knowing something
of your stage of womanhood, and your experi
ence of life, I can scarcely choose with safety
between describing our "society" as profoundly
stupid, or most varied and agreeable. There
are those to whom it might be either. I, my.
self, find it the latter, but then I have got
through with my crust-experience of life, and
like people neither more nor less for the house
they live in or the clothes they wear Charm
ing women are everywhere—some smothered
under their husbands' good dinners, or shelved
away in bank stock and splendid carriages;
sonic unthought-of in dairies or forgotten be
hind wash-tubs and single blessedness. Na•
titre's noblemen are everywhere,—in town and
out of town, gloved and rough handed, rich qed
poor. Prejudice against a lord because he is a
lord, is losing the chance of finding a good fel.
low, as much as prejudice against a ploughman
because he is a ploughman. Are you ready,
dear Mrs. "Harriet," to take a second look, af
ter reading the outside label upon a man or a
woman, and to confirm it, or not, according to
God's mark, whirls will show itself somewhere?
If so, the society of Highland Terrace will be
delightful to you.—Home Journal.
How Much Sugar do we Eat.
Last year there was consumed in this country;
about 705,000,000 pounds of cane sugar, and
27,000,000 pounds of maple sugar. Thil gives
more than twenty-four pounds of cane sugar,
and one pound of maple sugar to every man,
woman, and child. This does not include mo
lasses or honey. If• this sugar was put into
barrels holding two hundred pounds, and each
barrel occupied a space of three feet square on
ly, it would require 336 acres of land for it to
stand upon. The barrels, if placed in a row,
would reach two hundred and twenty miles.—
if this sugar was put up in paper packages of
five pounds each, it would require 116,400,000
sheets of wrapping paper; and if only a yard of
string was used to each package, there would
be required 439,200,000 feet or 85,000 miles of
string—three times enough to go round the
earth. If every retail clerk sold one hundred
pounds of sugar each day, it would require
nearly 25,000 clerks to sell it all in a year. If
the dealers, wholesail and retail together, made
a profit of only two cents a pound on this su
gar, these profits alone would amount to near
ly 515,000,000. Can some of our young school
friends tell us how much tea this would sweet
en T—American Agriculturist.
Sweet Potato Vines.
A correspondent of the "Georgia Telegraph,"
states that the vines of the sweet potato tatty
be saved during the winter and used in the
spring for propagating a new crop. In the fall
any time before frost takes place, the vines
may be cut in any convenient length, and
placed, in layers on the surface of the earth,
to the depths of twelve or eighteen inches, co
ver the vines, whilst damp; with partially rot
ten straw; (either pine or wheat will answer,)
to the depth of six in sites, and cover the whole
with a light soil about four inches deep. In
this way, the vines will keep during the winter
and in the spring they will put forth sprouts as
abundantly as the potato itself when bedded.—
The draws or sprouts can be planted first, and
the vine itself can be subsequently used as we
generally plant slips.
SINGULAR FACT.—Sir Edward Parry, the
celebrated Arctic navigator, recently said,
apoaking of the Polar seas:
Yon cannot imagine the changes that take
place in the ice there. I hare been myself
sometimes beset for two or three days together
by the ice, its such a war that froM the mast•
head I could not see sufficient writer to float a
bottle in; and iii twentyfour hours, there we 4
not a bit of ice to be soon—nobody could tell
why—l cannot tell why; and you might have
sailed .about as you may in rur o—rt rivcr, as
ice I, cotm^crnc9.
;WTII
The Poor Voter on Election Day.
BY Jonx G. ITTIITTUR.
The proudest now is but my peer,
The highest not more high;
To-day, of all the weary year,
A king of men am I.
Today, alike are great and small,
The nameless and the known;
My palace is the people's hall,
The ballot box my throne
Who serves to day upon the list
Beside the served shall stand,
Alike the brown and wrinkled fist,
The gloved and dainty hand I
The rich is level with the poor,
The weak is strong to-day;
And sleekest broadcloth counts no more
Than homespun frock of gray.
Today let pomp and vain pretence
bly stubborn right abide;
I set a plain man's common sense
Against the pedant's pride.
Today shall simple manhood try
The strength of gold and land;
The wide world has not wealth to buy
The power in my right hand.
While there's a grief to seek redress,
Or balance to adjust,
While weighs our living manhood loss
Than Mammon's vilest dust,—
While there's a right to need my vote,
A wrong to sweep away,—
Up I clouted knee and ragged coat I
A man's a man to-day l
Our Navy.
A question which has bees repeatedly asked
by almost every journal in the United States is,
"what shall be done with the surplus revenue,"
which is at present overflowing the Treasury,
and many suggestions have been made as to
the best manner for its depletion. Some wish
it to be applied to the building of a railroad to
the Pacific. Some that it should be expended
in establishing lines to Australia, China and
other important points where there is a likeli
hood of increasing our commerce advantage
ously. Some think that as Uncle Sam is so
"flush' he should take advantage of this state
of things to pay off some of his debts, and take
I off, or reduce, the tax upon certain articles of
trade; others say that it should be distributed
among the states for internal improvements.—
These are a few of the numerous puggestions
daily made through the Press of the country;
and we are willing to concede that possibly
the adoption of any of the suggested plans
might effect good results. But there is yet
another which has been made that we think of
an great, if not greater importance than any
other, especially at the present time. It is the
increase of our naval strength. We think that
no wiser or better disposition of a portion, at
least, of the surplus revenue could be made than
to obtain a naval force strong enough to pro-
tect our commerce at all times, more especially
nt the present when a general war is apprehen•
ded inEurope, and which event could not occur
without greatly endangering our commerce.
' Even in times of profoundest tranquility, the
demand for an armed naval force is great in
proportion to the extent of commerce carried
on by a country as a prevention of any thing
like aggression upon it. Great complaint has
been made of the insignificancy of our naval
strength, and of its inadequacy to the protee.
tion of our rapidly growing commerce. In
case of a general war in Europe, unless it is
protected by a powerful and efficient force, the
result may be most disastrous. It then becomes
our duty and our best interest to be prepared
fur such a contingency, by increasing the
strength of our navys to such an extent that it
will be able to afford sure protection to our
commerce and bid defiance to all foreign ag•
gression.—Kashrille Gazette.
Henry Clay's Advice to Young Lawyers
On Mr. Clay's last visit to the East, in an
address which he made to the students of the
State and National Law School, now removed
from Ballston Spa to Poughkeepsie, after lie.
tatting to their speaking powers in the trial of a
fictitious case, ho said; among other things:—
" When I commenced my profession in Lex•
ington, as there was then no institution like
this, I was in the habit of daily exercising my
speaking powers alone in any secluded place
I could find. In the winter, often in a barn;
in the summer, in a corn-field, converting some
tall stalk into a judge, and the shorter ones be
side it into jurors. To this practice, in which
I had none of the facilities of instruction and
criticism which you enjoy, more than to any
other cause, do I attribute whatever success I
attained at the bar. It gave me a fluency of
speech, a power and rapidity of thought, and a
degree of self-confidence, Without which, like
multitudes in the profession; I might have
lacked courage at the outset, and by postpone.
ing the dreaded first efforts, have abandoned
in the end all hope of distinction. I seldom
offer my poor self as a pattern, but in this you
will do well to remember and imitate my exam
ple. Here you enjoy many superior facilities
for practice and improvement. If you improve
them well, the result will be seen and felt with
the force of destiny on your future course and
standing. My advice to every legal student is
to make an extempore speech every day, and
when he is admitted, he will have gained a
fast hold upon the great element of success at
the bar."
VALUE or MA:trim—The manure applied to
the soil of England amounts to $300;000,000,
being more than the value of its whole foreign
commerce, and yet the grateful soil yields back
with intecest all that is thus lavished upon it.
And so it would he here if we would only Must
the soil with tiny portion of our capital. But
this we rarely do. A farmer who has made any
money spends it not in his business, but in
some other oteuptition.. Ire buys more land
when he ought to buy more manure, or he puts
out his money in some joint stock company, to
convert sunshine into moonshine. ftely upon
it, our richest mine is the barnyard—and what.
ever temptation shares or stocks may offer, the
beet investment for a farmer is live ttvch and
vlengh
AristoiritCY.
Casimer Perier, on being called an aristo
crat, replied, "My only aristocracy is the supe
riority which industry, frugality, perseverance
and intelligence will always insure to every
man in a free state of society; and I belong to
those privileged classes, to which you all toy
belong in your turn. They are not privileges
created for us, but by us. Our wealth is our
own—we have made it; our ease is our own—
we have gained it by the sweat of our brows,
or by the labor of our minds. Our position in
society is not conferred upon us, but purchased
by ourselves—with our own intellect, applica
tion, zeal, patience and industry. If you re
main inferior to us, it is because you have not
the talent, the industry, the zeal, or the sobrie
ty, the patience or the application necessary to
your advancement. You wish to become rich,
as some do to become wise; but there is no
royal road to wealth any more than there is to
knowledge. The husbandman who will not
till his ground, shall reap nothing but thistles
and briers. What right have you who do noth
ing for yourselves, your families, or your coun
try, or mankind, to imagine that you will be
selected by your fellow citizens for their favor,
their confidence, their rewards ? If, by aristo
crat, you mean one who has earned his promo
tion by his industry, then indeed I am an aris
tocrat; and please God, I may always remain
as. You are too idle to labor, and too proud
to beg. I throw back then with indignation
and resentment the charge which is made."
Kicking Horne,
It occurred to me that a recipe published in
your paper for the cure of kicking horses, might
be of much service to persons afflicted with
such dangerous animals. The operation for
cure to be commenced as follows, to wit : Put
on a hendstall or bridle, with twisted W, or
twisted straight bitts in the mouth of the horse
to be cured; then put on a common baclosad
dle, with thill lugs, or any strap or girth, with
loops on either side of the horse, is equally
good; then buckle a pair of long reins, open in
the middle, into the hilts. and pass them through
the thill lugs or loops; one to each hind leg,
above the fetlock joint, there make each rein
fast to the leg, allowing sufficient length of rein
for your horse to walk or trot, as the operator
may think proper. Everything complete, you
you will have the animal commence the oper
ation of kicking; the first will be a smart kick,
the second lighter, and so on till your horse
cannot be made to kick any more. By the
above method many now worthless horses may
be made valuable.—. Paine Farmer.
The Dutch Blacksmith.
Colonel F , a very irritable and impa
tient man, had occasion once, whilo passing
on horseback through a small town In the
West, to patronize a Mitch blacksmith.
"Are you the smith?'' he askod of a stout,
black-bearded, smoking, dirty man, who came
out of the shop to look at the horse's defective
shoes.
"Yees, I been der shin idt," replied Meiulmer,
steadying his long pipe with his left hand, while
be lifted one of the horse's feet with his right.
"You wish him to have de new Mmes."
. - -
"No sir," said the Colonel, in his quick way.
"Set the shoes on his lbre feet;—that's all."
"Set de shoe on his fore feet—yah, I condor.
stan. I will have him in von hour shoed."
The Colonel went away, and returning at
the appointed time, found the Dutch smith
still at work on his horse. Ile was very wroth
when he saw the state of affairs ; but he went
away again with the promise that in "vun half
hour" longer the shoes would be set. After
dinner, in no very mild humor, he made his ap•
pearance again at the shop, and asked "what
was to pay."
"Four shilling, - ens the reply.
"Four shillings! It is an unposition I" ex
claimed the fiery Colonel. "I never paid over
a shilling for setting a shoo in my life."
"W cry veil," nodded Meittheer. "Von shil
ling for de vim shoe—l set de four shoes—dal
ish four shilling—niclas I
"Nick! the Old Nick !" roared the e*elted
traveller. "Who told you to set more than two
shoes?"
uty doonder l" said the smith, "you tell me
yourself."
"I? It's a falsehood—a
"Mine Cott You say set de shoes on de four
foot—"
"So I did 1 the two shoes on the /we feet 1"
"Cott in liimmelli ish de mann crazy ? Two
shoes on
.four feet! \run hat on dice head as
mootch 1"
'You eternal f-f•fool 17 exclaimed the .Col.,
who stuttered when much excited, "I said set
the fore shoes on these two feet, you b•b•blun•
dering Dutchman."
"Set four shoes on two feet.? Ha, ha, ha l"
lautrbed the smith scornfully and angrily.—
"Hundert touzand blitzes! you tam Yankee!"
"Yon w-w-w•wooden headed Dutchman!"
'Yon Yankee geese! monkey vun tam jack ,
ass—fool !"
The Colonel replied, stuttering worse than
ever; the smith struck his fists and jabbered
Dutch, his knowledge of English being ex
hausted; and thus they had it, "back and forth,"
until a mutual acquintance cattle . up and ex
plained the matter. The Col. pnt the charge,
laughing at the mistake; while 3leinheer smo
ked on fiercely, cursing copiously the language
which made tbnr feet two feet, or two feet four
feet, "any way but.der right way—doonder and
blitzen I"—True Flag:
SulphitFoons.
A verdant Irish girl , just arrived, was sent
to tin Intelligence office by the Commissioner
of Emigration, to find a place at service. She
was sent to a restaurant, where a "stout help"
was wanted, and while in conversation with the
proprietor, he took occasion to light his cigar
by igniting a locofoco match on the sole of his
boot. As soon as the girl saw this, she ran
away half frightened to deathi and when she
reached the Intelligence office, she was almost
breathless:
"Why, what is the matter with you 9 " said
the proprietor, swing her rush in, in such con.
fusion.
"Och f sure sur, but ye's tint me to the ould
divil himself, in human form."
"What do you mean—has he dared to insult
"a help" from my office?" inquired the man.
"Yin sur," returned the girl—"he's the divil."
"What, did ho do to you—tell me, and
fix hint for it," said he, quite exasperated.
"Why aur, whilst I was talkie' to him about
the wages, ho turned np the bottom of his fut,
and wid a splinter in his fingers, stir, ho gis
gavo one strike, and the fire flew out of bit fat,
and burned the stick, and he lighted his sem
wid it, right afore eon own face. the din.
11 Lure. I',
NO. 49.
Noneniting a CrecUtah
there was a certain lawyer on the Cape, a
long time ago, the only one in those "diggins"
then, and for aught I know, at present. He
was a man well to do in the world, and what
was somewhat surprising in a limb of the law,
averse to encouraging litigation.
One day a llent came to him in a moat ter•
rible raget
"Look here, Squire," said he, "that 'ere bias•
ted shoemaker down to Pigeon Cove, bas gone
and sued me, for the money for a pair of boots
I owed him."
"Did the boots suit you / 9
Oh I pea—l re got thins on now—fuat late
boots."
"Fair price 7 0
i'Oh, yes."
"Then you owe him the money hotmetly r
"Conrse."
"Well, why don't you pay him 9"
"Why, 'cause the blasted snob went and sod
me, and I want to keep him out of the money
if I kin."
lit will cost you something."
"I don't hoer a cuss for that. How much
money do you want to begin with?"
"Oh I ten dollars will do."
"Is that all ? Well here's an X, so go ahead,
and the client went out, very well satisfied with
the beginning.
Our lawyer next called on the shoemaker
and fished him what he meant by commencing
legal proceedings against M.
- “lVlty,' said he, "I kept on sendin to him tilt
I got tired. I knoved he was able to pay—and
I was 'termined, to make him. That's the long
and short of it."
''Well," said the lawyer. "he's always been a
good customer to you, and I think you acted too
hastily. There's a trifle to pay on account of
your proceeding—but I think you'd better take
this five dollars and call it square."
"Certain Squire, if you say so, and darned
glad to get it," was the answer.
So the lawyer forked over one V, and kept
the other.
In a few days his client came along and
asked how he got along with his case.
"Rapidly I" said the lawyer—"we've nnnsui•
fed him I—and he will never trouble you."
..Terusalem ! that's great!" cried the client;
"I'd rather agin fifty dollars than have him got
the melte!, for them lilints."
IN. 1' Spirit of the Times.
Wasu't lynch in Figures.
An old crone. keeping a en•rolled "cookey
stand." was one day accosted by a wag with—
" How do you sell oranges?"
"Two cents."
"Well," said he, taking up one, and turning
it over is his hand, "How do you sell this
cake ?"
"The same price."
"Supposing I gibe you back the orange, and
take the cake ?"
Wen. well I"
taic pielwo mu?"
"Yes"
"Well, I think I'll take this pie after all, in•
stead of the cake; what do yon ask for cider?"
"Two cents a glass."
"Take the pie back and give me a drink of
A glass was filled, and banded to the cus
tomer. who after swallowing the same, and
smacking his lips with great gusto, was delib
erately walking off when he was arrested
with--
"Please Nir. you hayn't paid for the cider!"
"Our friend cooly observed, "what should
pay for?"
"The cider, to be sure."
"Didn't I give you a pie for it 2"
i•Yes, but von didn't pay for the pie."
"Very well, I exchanged the cake for it,"
"Yes, but you haint paid for that."
"I gave you the orange for it."
"The orange is two cents."
"Well. Why should I pay for it, I didn't eat
it, did I'1"
"No matter, exclaimec: the dame, "no mat•
ter, there's a mistake somewhar. but I can't
see it; /never was much un jiggures; you need.
n't call again." •
Vote for Him
Lewis, the fun.loving editor of the "N. IL
Union," says an exchange, is a candidate for
the Legislature. In the last number of his pa
per, he published a circular to his fellow-citi
zens of eiglal columns. Whereupon he says :
It may be asked why I write so long a circu
lar. An anecdote will illustrate my answer.—
Once upon a time an old lady sent her grand.
son out to set a turkey. On his return the fol
lowing dialogue took place:
"Sammy, have you set her
"Yes, grandma."
"Fixed the nest all up niedy?"
"Mighty fine, grandma."
"How many eggs did you put under her?"
"Ono hundred and twenty, grandma."
" Why Sammy, what did you put so many
under her for?"
"Grandma, I wanted to see her spread her•
self,"
iffy opponents will pitch into this circular—
hope they will have a good time in making a
large per tentage off of it: A short one %Mind
be ns much as they could get over, but I want
to see them spread themselves!
CorLDN'T Do Iv.—Recently; upon the cars
running out of Cleveland; a lady was peddling
tracts, playing female colporteur. The tract
which engrossed her special attention was enti•
fled, "Give me thy heart," and was undoubtely
an orthodox and valuable production. With.
out a word, she presented it to a quiet looking
gentleman, who read its title, and replied—
"No, madam, I can't give it, this woman is
my wife."
The heart-seeker vamoscd, and the passe&
gem roared.
As EPITAPII.-The kritzszym says that the
following inscription is copied from a church
yard in Essex:
Hero lies the man Richard,
4nd Mary his wife;
Their surnames was Pitchard;
They lived without strife;
And the reason ivas plain—
They abounded in riches,
They had no care or pain,
And the 'loge ;tore the breeches,
ar A lawyer went into a barber's shop to
procure a wig. In taking the dimensions of the
lawyer's head, the boy exclaimed,
'Why, bow long your head is, sir."
"Yes," replied our worthy friend, "we law
yers must have long heads." The boy procee
ded with his vocation, and exclaimed, "it le as
thick as it is long." Blackstone misled.
"I have a good ear, a wonderful ear,'
raid a c ,, ncAitud musician, in a conversation.
jesl!atc." replia , l a I.7,:tatrieln•