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SN ffantitg Setutipaper—Debotett to Sentra ilintelttsente, Ottrbertfoinn, Volitico, /Literature, faoratttg, arto, Aciencto, Nartculturt,2lmllmtotent, Szt., szt.
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ruinous. ar
THEODORE H. CREMER.
*- • The 4 .JoverrAr." will be published every Wed
nesday morning, at $2 00 a year, if paid in advance,
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No subscription received for a shorter period than
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cordingly.
POETRY.
"To charm the languid hours of solitude,
He oft invites her to tho Muses lore."
Tat LAST MAN.
UT THOMAS CAMPBELL, ESQ..
All worldly shapes shall melt in gloom,
The Sun himself must die,
Before this mortal shall assume
Its immortality !
I saw a vision in my sleep,
That gave my spirit strength to sweep
Adown the gulf of time!
I saw the last of human mould,
b , That shall Creation's death behold,
A. Adam saw her prime !
The Sun's eye had a sickly glare,
The Earth with age was wan,
'rho skeletons of nations were
Around that lonely man!
Some had expired in fight,—the brands
Still rusted in their bony hands;
In plague and famine some :
Earth's cities had no sound nor tread;
And ships were drifting with the dead
To shore. where all was dumb!
Yet, prophet-like, that lone one stood,
With dauntless words and high,
That shook the sere leaves from the wood .
As if a storm passed by,
Saying, We're twins in death, proud Sun,
Thy face is cold, thy race is run,
"l'is mercy bids thee go;
For thou ten thousand thousand years
Haat seen the tide of human tears,
That shall no longer flow.
What though beneath thee man put forth
His pomp, his pride, his skill ;
And arts that made fire, flood and earth
The v Is of his will;
Yet me,-not thy parted sway,
Thou dim du:crowned king of day :
For all those trophied arts
And triumphs that beneath thee sprang,
Heald not a passion or a pang
Entailed on human hearts.
Go—let oblivion's curtain full
Upon the stage of men,
Nor with thy rising beams recall
Life's tragedy again.
Its piteous pageants bring not back,
Nor waken flesh, upon the rack
Of pain anew to write;
Stretch'd in diseases shapes abhored,
Or mown in battle by the sword,
Like grass beneate the scythe.
Ev'n I km weary in yon skies
To watch thy fading fire,
Test of all sumlees agonies,
Behold not me expire.
My lips that speak thy dirge of death—
Their rounded gasp and gurgling breath
To see thou shalt not boast:
The eclipse of Nature spreads any pall,—
The majesty of Darkness shall
Receive my parting ghost,
This spirit shall return to Him
That gave its heavely spark ;
Yet think not, Sun, it shall be dim
When thou thyself art dark!
No! it shall live again, and shine
In bliss unknown to beams of thine;
By Him recalled to breath,
Who captive led captivity,
Who robbed the grave of victory,—
And took the sting from Death !
Go, Sun, while Mercy holds me up
On Nature's awful waste,
To drink this last and bitter cup
Of grief that man shall taste—
, Go, tell the night that hides thy face,
• Thou saw'st the last of Adam's race,
On Earth's sepulchral clod,
The dark'sting universe defy
To quench his immortality,
Or shake his trust in God!
From Nears Gazelle.
FOR AN ALBUM.
DT OEORGE BROOMS,
For thee may ever blooming Spring
New scenes of joy prepare,
And every changing moment bring
Fresh roses for thy hair.
Or thought of ill or worldly care
Ne'or may thy bosom know,
T:tose laughing eyes nc'er drop a tear
But for another's woe.
May peace thy footsteps still attend,
When past thy youthful hours.
Nor age steal on without a friend
To strew thy path with flowers.
And when the allotted years have sped
By bounteous nature given,
May angels watch around thy bed
To point thy way to Heaven!
Tea Bon wtz.,—.The greatest touch of the sub
lime we have lately aeon is contained in the follow
ing stanza:
There Mb a man in our town,
That got into a steeple,
And filled a warming pan with grog,
And throwed it on the people."
ca Wonder if there was sugar in it 1
LPmc. o aZ)9
ICIOCZ:iI4.6.II"ZOtt,
Prom Me Larks' National Magazine.
THE BORDERER'S CHILD;
OR WASHINGTON AT EIGHTEEN.
It was a calm, sunny day in the year 1750 ; the
scene a piece of land on the Northern Neck of Vir
ginia, contiguous to a noble stream of water. Im
pliments of surveying were lying about, and several
men idly reclining under the trees, betokened by
their dress and appearance that they composed a
party engaged in layng out the wild lands of the
frontier of the Old Dominion. These persons had
apparently just finished their noontide meal, for the
relics of the banquet were scattered around.
Apart from the group walked a young man, evi
dently superior to his companions, though there
was nothing obtrusive in his air, which, on the con
trary, was distinguished by affability. A certain
dignity of aspect, however, accompanied him.--
Added to this he was of a tall and compact frame,
and moved with the elastic tread of one accustomed
to constant exercise in the open air. Ii is counte
nance could not have been said to be handsome, but
it wore a look of decision and manliness, not usual
ly found in one so young, for apparently he was still
little over 18 years of age. His hat had been cast
off, as if for comfort, and he had paused, with i .one
foot advanced, in a natural and graceful - attitude at
the moment that we have introduced him to our
reader.
Suddenly their Was a - shriek, then another, and
several in rapid succession. The voice was that of
a woman, and seemed to proceed from the other
side of a dense thicket. At the first scream the
youth turned his head in the direction whence the
sound proceeded, but when it was repeated he dash
ed aside the undergrowth which separated him from
it, and quickening his footsteps as the cries succee
ded each other with alarming rapidity, he soon
dashed into an open space or „ clearing," as the
borderers even then called it, on:the bank of the
stream, in the centre of which a rude log-cabin
stood, whose well-pole poised over one end, and
smoke curling from the chimney gave signs of ha
bitation. As the young man, with a face flushed
by haste, broke from the undergrowth, he saw his
companions crowded together on the bank of the
river, while in their midst a woman, from whom
1 proceeded the shrieks, was visible, held back by two
of the most athletic of the men, but still struggling
violently for freedom.
It was the work of an instant to make his way
through the crowd and comfort the female. The
moment her eyes fell on him she exclaimed :
Oh, sir—you will do something for me. Make
them release me--for the love of God ! My boy
—my poor boy is drowning and they will not let
me go."
ft would be madness--she will jump into the
river,' said one of those wino held her, as the fran
tic mother strove again to break from his grasp.—
The rapids would dash her to pieces in a minute.'
The youth had scarcely waited for these words.—
His eyes took in at a single glance, the meaning
of the sad group.
He recollected the child of the woman, a bold
little fellow of four years old, whose handsome blue
eyes and flaxen ringlets anode him a favorite with
strangers, and filled the mother's heart with pride
whenever she gazed on him. He had been accus
tomed to play at will, in the little enclosure before
the cabin ; but this morning, the gate having been
accidentally left open, he had stolen out when his
mother's hack was turned, reached the edge of the
bank; and was in the act of looking over, when his
parent's eye caught sight of him. The shriek which
she uttered precipitated the catastrophe she feared,
for the child frightened at the cry, lost his balance
and fell headlong into the stream, which here went
foaming and roaring along innumerable rocks, con•
stituting the most dangerous rapids known in that
section of the country. Scream now followed
scream in rapid succession, as the agonized mother
rushed to the bank. She arrived there eimultane
ously with the party whom we left reclining in the
shade, and who were scattered about within a few
steps of the accident. Fortunate was It that they
were so near, else the mother would have plunged in
after the child and both been lost. Se ieral of the men
immediately approached the brink and were on the
point of springing in after the child, when the sight
of the sharp rocks crowding the channel, the rush
and whirl of the waters, and the want of any
knowledge where to look for the child, deterred them,
and they gave up the enterprise.
Not so with the youth we have introduced. His
first work was to throw off his coat; his next to
spring to the edge of the bank. Here he stood for
a second, running his eye rapidly over the scene
below, and taking in, with a glance, the different
currents and the most dangerous of the rocks, in or
der to shape his course by them when in the stream.
He had scarcely formed his conclusion, when his
gaze rested on a white object in the water that he
knew at once to be the boy's dress; and, while Ilie
companions aghast at his temerity, were prevented,
as much by consternation ashy the awe with which
he had already inspired them from interfering, he
plunged headlong into the wild and roaring rapids.
. -
'Thank God—he will save my child,' gasped the
woman, , see—there he is--oh ! my boy, my dar
ling boy, how could I leave you.'
Every ono had rushed to the brink of the preci
pice, and was now fallowing, with eager eyes, the
perilous progress of the youth, as the current bore
him, onward like a feather in the embrace of a hur
ricane. Now it seemed as if he would be dashed
against a jutting rock over which the water flew in
foam ; and now a whirlpool would drag him In, from
whose grasp escape would appear impossible. At
times the current bore him under, and he would be
lost to sight; then, just as the spectators gave him
up, he would reappear though far enough from
where he vanished, still buffeting amidst the vortex.
Oh ! how that mother's straining eyes followed hint
in his perilous career—how her heart sank when ho
went under—and with what a gush of joy she saw
emerge again front the waters, and flinging the
waves aside with hts athletic arms, struggle on, in
pursuit of her boy. But it seemed as if his gen
erous efforts were to be of no avail, for though the
current was bearing off the boy before his eyes,
scarcely ten feet distant, he could not, despite his
gigantic efforts, overtake the drowning child.
On they flew, the youth and the child ; and it was
miraculous how he escaped being dashed to pieces
against 'the rocks. Twice the boy went out of
sight, and a suppressed shriek escaped the mother's
lips; hut twice he re-appeared, and then, with
hands wrung wildly together and breathless anxiety.
she followed his progress, as his unresisting form
was hurried onward with the current.
The youth now appeared to redouble his exer
tions, for they were approaching the most danger
ous part of the river, where the rapids, contracting
between the narrowed shores, shot almost perpen
dicular down a declivity of fifteen feet. The rush
of waters at this spot was tremendous, and no one
ventured to approach its vicinity, even in a canoe,
lest they should Le sucked in. What, then, would
be the youth's fate unless he speedily overtook the
child. He seemed fully sensible of the increasing
peril, and urged his way through the foaming cur
rent with desperate strength. Three several times
he was on the point of grasping the child, when
the waters whirled the prize from him. The third
effort was mode just as they were abotit entering
within the influence of the current above the fall,
and when it failed the mother's heart sank within
her end she groaned aloud, fully expecting to see
the youth give up the task. But no ! he only pres
sed forward the more eagerly, and as they breath
lessly watched, they saw, amidst the boiling waters,
as if bearing a charmed life, the final of the brave
youth, following close after that of the boy. And,
now, like an arrow from the bow, pursuer and pur
sued shot the brink of the precipice. An instant
they hung there, distinctly visible amid the glassy
waters, that seemed to pause on the edge of the
descent.. Every brain grew dizzy at the sight. But
a shout of involuntary exultation burst from the
spectators when they saw the boy held aloft by the
right arm of the youth—a shout alas! that was
suddenly checked by horror when the rescuer and
rescued vanished into the abyss.
A moment—rather many moments elapsed, be
fore a word was spoken or a breath drawn. Each
of the group felt that to look into the mother's face
was impossible. She herself had started eagerly
forward and now stood on the bank, a few paces
nearer the cataract, where she could command a
view of its foot, gazing thither with fixed eyes, as
if her all depended on what the next momentshould
reveal. Suddenly she gave a glad cry.
There they are,' she exclaimed, see they are
safe—Great God I thank thee!' and for a moment
wildly turning her face to heaven, she hurried with
trembling steps along the side of the river in the
direction of the fall.
Every eye followed hers, and sure enough there
was the youth, still unharmed, and still buffeting
the waters. He had just emerged from the boiling
vortex below the cataract. With one hand he held
aloft the child and with the other he was making
for the shore.
They ran, they shouted, they scarcely knew what
they did, until they reached his side, just as be had
struggled to the bank. They drew hint out ahnost
exhausted. The boy was senseless but his mother
declared he still lived as she pressed him frantically
to her bosom. His preserver, powerfully built and
athletic as he was, could scarcely stand, so faint
was lie from his exertions.
Who shall describe the sccdo that followed—
the mother's calmness while she strove to resusci
tate her boy, and her wild gratitude to his preserver
when the child was out of danger and sweetly
sleeping in her armsi Our pen shrinks at the task.
But her words, pronounced them—we mny hope in
the spirit of prophecy--were remembered afterward
by more than one who heard them.
God will reward you,' said she, as t cannot.
He will do great things for you in return for this
day's work, and the blessings of thousands, beside
mine, will attend you.'
And it was so. For to the hero of that hour
were subsequently confided the destinies of a migh
ty nation. But throughout his long career, what
tended perhaps most to make him honored and re
spected beyond all men, was the self.sacrifteing spirit
which, in the rescue of that mother's child, as in
the most august events of his life, characterized our
WASHINGTON
Glt. WONT Wen.--The Kentucky Giantess,
who is 6 feet 1 t incites in height has refused to wed
a 7 foot Vermonter on account of his small stature.
She wants u mon, she says.
AN Assws.n.—A lady wrote upon a window
some verses, intimating her design of never marry
ing. A gentleman wrote the following lines un
derneath :
Tito lady who this resolution took
Wrote it on glass to show it could be broke.
Z'hil. Plinn's Adventure.
Did ye remember Jim Ryan, Teddy,'
,To be sure I do, Phil. llind't he stick to me
like skin to a praty, in my set-to with the baste of
a landlord who was for kicking Kathleen into na.
ture's cabin, when her soul was bidding good-bye
to her poor body?'
True for you, Teddy. Ho was the boy to ham
mer justice into a spalpeen with his fists, or the
cardinal principles into a sinner with his tongue.—
FatherO'Donnegan was no match for him.
Faith you are right there, Phil. And by the
same token, when I refused to listen to the advice
of Father Matthew, didn't he preach to me until he
made me believe that Belzebub used my heart for
his breeches pocket?'
Well, Teddy, when I wint to cousin Lary Bry
an's wake, (rent his soul) I made over free with the
dew, and got as drunk as a gintleman.'
As was your custom, Phil. Whiskey came as
natural to you as pratics.'
And as natural to yourself, Teddy Burgess, as
raw mate to a cannabal. As I was saying, I got
as drunk as a baste at Lary's wake. The town
clock was hammering out the small hours when I
left the cabin. The moon, bad luck to him, had
covered his head, but here and there I could see a
star.winking at me as if it said mind your eye, Jim
Ryan's.' Jist forenent his gate, I felt my feet trip
ped up, but it was no use, for a great monster with
horns held me down. Who are you,' said I.
Belsebub,' said he, as he gave me a pelt on the
nose with his hoof.
Murther ! murther! !' said I.
Hould your tongue, ye baste,' said Belzebub.—
Yer a drunken divil, and ye belong to me.'
When I heard this Teddy, I felt my limbs shake
like a shamrock brig in a gale, and I called upon
the Saints to help me.
Ye needn't pray, Phil Flinn, ye are past re
demption,' said he, giving me a butt with his horns
which made my head crack as if a thousand shills
, labs had been bating at it.
Mr. Delzebub,' said I, it's not fair to strike a
gintleman when he's on his ;rack.'
Yer no gintleman, Phil Flinn,' said he.
Yet a blackguard,' said I.
Yer drunk,' said he, giving me another jab with
his horns.
t True for you, if you are the divil,' said I.
',olio waste ye! nuking. for whiskey; said he.—
, Bridget, yer wife,le ragged, and yer children are
starving..
Tree for you again,' said I.
Yer a fit subject Cur purgatory,' said Ire.
.13e easy with me, Mr. Belzebub, and I'll take
the pledge,' said I.
I'll not believe you, Phil Flinn,' said he.
Let me off now,' said and I'll swear by $t
Patrick to take the pledge to-morrow.'
I'll not trust ye,' said he; and he began to pull
mc, when I cried out,
'l'll take the pledge now, yer honor.'
None of yer blarney, Phil; but if ye'll take the
pledge this instant, ye'll find Jim Ryan within, and
he'll give it ye.'
'l'll do that same,' said I ; and Beltebub, alley
giving me another bolt with his horns, got off. As
I rose up, who should I see but Jim Ryan coming
towards me.
Is that Phil Flinn 1' said he.
It is, Jim.'
Are you drunk said he.
'Na,' said I; Belaebilb had hammered me sober.
You have been ;' said he.
True, Jim; but I'm now steady as a praste,and
have promised to take the pledge from you.'
Good!' said Jim, as he led me into his cabin,
where I took the pledge and went home to Bridget.'
'That's a strange story,' said Teddy Burgess.
I kept the secret for a yea!, Teddy, and my
pledge besides; and it was not until I became con
firmed in sobriety, that Jim Rayon told me that on
the night of Lary's wake, he had been to the mar
ket town to buy a buck, and that he was carrying
him from his cart as I was staggering home—that
when I fell before his door, I joshed the buck from
his shoulder—it fell on me; and instead of Belaebub
it was the tethered buck that had kicked me, and
Jim Rayon who played the part of the devil for
the occasion.
A Tintaisir IDEA.-The Now Orleans Picayune
gives the following as a translation from a late Tur
kish paper, printed at Constantinople, in relation to
our Presidential election :
‘. Of tho three candidates now seeking to be Ca
liph of America, two are men of remarkable endow
mento and the other is naturally popular in tho
Southern States. •In the North, where there are
few people of color, the struggle will ben close one
between Mr. Mini and Mr. Palk; but in the South
Mr. Burnee, he being a black man, will of course
carry every thing before him. Should either of the
for mer be chosen, it is understood that the friends
of the other will hang themselves in order to escape
proscription, a species of guillotine very much dread
ed by politicians, arid said to be an improvement
upon the bow string. In case Mr. B. should tri
umph there appears to be now no doubt that the
whole white population will bo put to the sword.—
Of course the success of either of the first named
gentlemen will insure the decapitation of the tie
groes, and produce a foreign war, as Great Britian
has sworn to protect a race of people from which
she gathers so much wool to pull over other pea
ple's eyes.'
c 0". A werb is a word that signifies to be to do,
or to suffer, (which is all the gramme,. I ever was
taught) and if there's a werb alive, I'm it. I'm al
ways beM', sometimes dein,' and continually suffer-
Chu:stet/AL
Ak,Robber's Strzta:ent
A freebooter taking an evening walk on a high
way in Scotland, overtook and robbed a wealthy
merchant traveller. His purpose Wan not achieved
without a severe struggle, in which the thief lost his
bonnet, and was obliged to escape leaving it on the
road. A respectable farmer, happening to be the
next passer, and seeing the bonnet alighted, took it
up and imprudently put it on his head. At this
instant the robbed man came up wills some assis
tance, and recognizing the bonnet, charged the far
mer with having robbed him, and took him into
custody. There being some likeness between the
two parties, the merchant persisted it the charge,
and though the respectability of the fanner was ad
mitted, he was indicted, and placed at the bar of a
superior court for trial. The government witness,
the merchant, swore positively to the identity of the
bonnet, and deposed likewise to the identity of the
farmer. 'the case was made out by this and other
evidence, apparently against the prisoner. But
there was a man in the court who well knew both
who did and who did not commit the crime.
This was the real robber, who suddenly advanced
from the crowd, and seizing the fatal bonnet, which
laid on the table before the witness, placed it on his
own head, and looking him full in the face, said to
him ih a voice of thunder, 'look at trte, sir, and tell
me on the oath you have sworn, am I not the man
who robbed you on the highway V By heavens,
you are the very man!' You see,' said the robber
what sort of memory the gentleman has, he swears
to the bonnet, whatever features are under it. If
the llon. Judge, were to put it on his own head,
dare say that he would testify that he robbed him.'
The innocent prisoner, was, on this evidence, at
once acquitted because no reliance could be placed
on such testimony, and yet it was positive evidence.
Thus the robber had the merit of saving the guilt-
less, and himself escaping detection.
THE LION ' S Rosa IN TOE DESERT. -Early in
the morning, as soon as the sun begins to cast its
rays on the sandy billows of the desert, the royal
animal rises from his lair to sally forth in quest of
prey. His voice may be heard in the distance, it
commences with a low murmuring which gradually
increases, until it at last becomes a fearful and ter
rific roar, like the roaring of thunder, and i■ audible
at a distance of two miles. The whole animal
kingdom tremble, and evince the greatest fear when
the king of beasts is heard; the sheep tremble as if
attacked with the ague, place their heads together,
and endeavor to hide themselves—the heroes break
out into a sweat with fear, and the dogs hairy ad
fast as they car., to find a place of refuge. In fine,
all the beasts ore seized with the most unequivocal
terror, when the lion makes his approach known.—
Should a caravan happen to be near the spot, it is
impossible to keep the camels together—they leap
about in all directions, and are scattered about un
der the influence of fear. I, myself, once had the
opportunity of witnessing a scene of this kind. On
arriving, in my travels, at the well of Samaria, we
suddenly heard a murmuring noise afar,reaemhling
the rolling of balls in an empty barrel—but!we Were
soon acquainted with the true cause, when it gradu
ally increased to the terrible thunker-like roar.—
With the first perception 4 this noise, the camels
belonging to our caravan separated in all directions.
The men end the eases tv:re thrown oft and if one
of the riders happeaed to keep his seat at the first
alarm, he was subsequently necessitated to leap
down to avoid toeing felled by the branches of the
trees—for we were unfortunately near a forest of
mimossas, and every one was in danger of being
torn by their large spines. This confusion, howev
er, did rot last long, for the lion took quite an oppo
site direction to the route of our enravan—but a
whole day was lost in collecting the goods that had
been thrown off or torn down by the trees, and one
of the camels strayed to a great distance.—Eastern
Traveller.
THE DUTCNAN'S Two TOGll'—Reader: did
you ever hear the story of the Dutchman's two
togs t' No. Well, here it is—listen Mine two
togs is better as you can't find in te world. To
little tog, mit black spots on him, is not so pig as to
big tog init notting but vita all obcr him. 're little
tog's tail curl vonce, twice, tree times, like to shrnoke
from mine pipe; but to otter tog's don't curl one
little mite, because it vas not cut off long enough to
curl. Yen to little tog parks, he says bow-wow
wow; but yen to pig pull tog lets off his park ho
goes boo-woo-woo—l calls him te pull tog because
he piles to pull like to tuytles. Vert he catches to
pull by te nose and holds him so fast es I can calk,
te little tog jumps up behind, to catch hold of to
middle of his tail ; and den he swings die vay and
dat vay, like—like—vot you call dat what makes
to clock go
A Goon HINT.—Sam Sliick counsels fathers,
who have marriageable sons, in the following wise :
If you want a son not to fall in love with any
eplendifferous gal, praise her tip to the aides, cull
her an angel, say she is a whole team and a horse to
spare and ull that —The moment the critter area
her, ho is a little grain disappointed, and says, .Well,
she is handsome, that's a fact; but she is not so
very, very overlantin' pretty arter all,—Then he
criticises her. Her foot is too thick in the instep ;
she rouges, is affected ; and so on : and the more
you oppose hint the more ho abuses her, till he
swears she is misreported, and aunt handsome at
all. Say nothing to him, and ho in spooney over
head and ears its a minute. Ile aces all beauty nod
no dokets, and is for walkers' into her affections at
once. Noth in' damages n gall, n preacher, or a lake,
like overpraise. A holm in one of the °Wiest thing.
I in natur' that is helped by it.
,--- 12actDaas• Esoccha 4V
A. Touching Little fltory.
There is something in female honesty which
charms as much as honesty in a MU ; and both ate
so rare, and at the same time so estimable, that the
celebrated distich of our moral bard will equally
apply to either:
• A *it's a feather, end a chief's a rod ;
An honest man's the noblest work of God.'
The Cardinal Fames, who was very properly
named the patron of the poor, gave public audience
once a week to indigent persons in his neighbor
hood, and distributed his bounty among them ay.;
cording to their wants. A woman of genteel ad
dress, but in a dejected, folorn condition, presented
herself one day with her daughter; a beautiful crea
ture about fifteen years bid, before this liberal
ecclesiastic.
My lord,' said she, the rent of my house (five
crowns) has been due some days, and my landlord
threatcna to tam rue into the street, unless he is
paid within the week. Have the goodness, my
Lord Caidinal, to interpose your sacred authority,
until by our industry we can satisfy the demand of
our persecutor.'
The cardinal wrote a billet, which he putinto the
petitioner's hand, and said, 'Go to my steward with
this paper, and receive from him five crowns:—
tut the steward, on her presenting the document,
paid down fifty. The woman absolutely refused to
receive more than five, alleging that his eminence
gave her to expect no more, and that it Must tre e mi.-
take. Both lucre so convinced of acting literally
according to order, that it was mutually agreed to
refer the matter to the cardinal himself.
'lt is true,' said he, 'there must be a mistake.--
Give the paper and I will rectify it.' He then re
turned the billet thus rectified to the woman, saying,
So much candor and honesty deserve recompense.
Here; I have ordered you a thousand crowns.—
What you can spare out of it lay up as a dowry for
your daughter in marriage, and regard my donation
as the blessing of God on the upright disposition of
a pure mind.'
Vakatries of the loan.
Thomas Moon wds arrested on Friday night, for
being eclipsed by a heavy cloud of liquoor.
What's your name 'l' said the Watchman.
Moon,' said Tom.
You can't shine, Mr. Moon !' said the watch.'
can't, that's a fact,' said Tom, .tho' I•have
filled my horns, and emptied them too; but kiwi
nte a hand—help me to rise. You know what
Byron soya--
. Tho Moon is up !
By Heaven. ! a glorious sight f'
Yes, I knows all that,' said the watchman, hut
its no matter whether I does or not, 'cause it aint
nothin' but poctry,and my old 'ortolan always told
melts how poetry is nonesenso ; so come along to the
watch-house, Mr. Moon.'
I cry quarter,' said Moon.
You shall get a quarter—that is, three calenclee
months—in the watch house,' cold the watchman.
, Then you extinguish my proepectsfutever;said
Moon.
Not ri bit of it,' said the Watchman; for instead
of putting you out, I put you in. And so, without
saying more on the subject, he took off Moou to the
calabor,zeo, a place where ho had often been before,
lie was immediately recognized by the officer of
the night, whose first salutation was :
" Why, Moon, how do you rise?'
'I don't rise at all; said he, I'm on the decline,'
And so you have let yourself be taken up
again,' said the officer. Well,' he added, I will
not prtend to say that you are male of green
chew; but from the number of times which you
hove recently let yourself fat: into the hands of the
watch, I do say you must be composed of verdant
material.'
Mr. Moon got his third quarter in the work house
from the Recorder.--N. 0. Picayune.
THE Bi BLE.-A French officer, who wns a pri
soner on his patrol° at Reading, met with a Bible.
He read it, and was so struck with its contents, that
he was convinced as to the truth of Christianity;
and resolved to become a Protestant. When his
gay associates rallied him for taking so serious a
turn, he said in his vindication—. I have done no
more than my school-fellow, Barnadotte, who is bee-
come a Lutheran.'
• Vcs ; but he became so,' said his associates, ' to
obtain a crown.'
My object,' said the Christian officer, is the
same. We only diar as to the place. The object
of Bernadotte is to obtain a crown in Sweden ;
mine, to obtain one in heaven.'—English Paper.
~f An ill-natured editor perpetrates the following
mess of spleen against that unfortunate class of
community, known as old maids:
The safest place in a thunder storm is on the
larboard side of an old maid. Being a nonconduc
tor there is no danger of her attracting any thing.'
nj'Txe scwr tiP axixs in creation is u sweet
kiss ! We speak from experience, of course!
The remedy should be used with great caution,
however, as it is spt to bring on an affection of the
heart !
'.NOTHING.—Au Irishman has defined
nothing to lat .2 footless stocking without a leg.'—
A description by another Emeralder is better:
What.is nothing?' he was astral—. Shut you{
eyes and you will see it,' said Pat.