'' 7 S
L
v..
11 4
THE BLESSJXGS CF GOVERNMENT, LIKE THE DEWS OF HEAVEN, SHOULD BE DISTRIBUTED ALIKE UPON THE HIGH AND THE LOW, THE RICH AND THE POOR,
0
EBENSBURG, OCTOBER 27, 1858.
VOL. 5. NO 49
YEOMAN OR WiHE.
D Y 1'. WAUD.
r,iaL.c of Wine- at entertainments
,4 .,.,. "foclharily reformer !
or wme,
WclwtitUU' 'Alien
;,, Mcxs d luc presence is warrocf
hIjo of tho vine.
.111 U1H!.V J
, are Jill "p
ro vt in n from two
i . i i
l'I '.'.h w;is iiisi
r"uVl'-'
I'il.lll rk-'T
111
I'.i
ni
i.
, b.irroi-s ;'a- b'.-uaty l.'.s whisky,
,.c;,aiic will be i'ut:i;.i t.) rue:
...r,v.s .-hfi a spirit :.ru In.iky
mountain dew.
i.ji-ks in the
tin i ? o'it--.
in
Mil;
.r. t:lJM--IliJ
W.t'. ir. ,;t:''
what might be expected from parents so sim
ple an J so good the young men intelligent
and well con Ju cted; the boys docile and prom-
lU .Mdcnt o nc ""UUw? ! beaded, rcsy-c becked puppet as ever was the
,raraci,M.iuB.Juu. u, """ net and nlavtl.innf ; lVrr fw;i Tf?c
; r r j - - - vtir, .. jc,
uowever, wita. tue eldest daughters that we
have to do.
Jane and Fanny Evans were as mnch alike
as has often befallen any two sisters not born
at one time; for, in the4 matter of twin-children,
there -has bcc"n a series of puzzles ever
j since the days 01 tue Lromtos. .Nearly of an
see, (T believe at this moment both arc tur
lip: j ued nineteen, and neither has reached twea
i ty.) exactly of a stchire, with hazel eyes.
full lips, white teeth, brown hnir, clear,
iV'H. Lur.oib , -i u.a.ii.. .... t healthy coniploxi-ms, ani that sort of a nose I
i which is iu-itliT Grecian nor ltoman, ' aor S
aijuihr.e, imr l- idit wz rttroussc, that some
I persons prti'cr to them all; but a nose which,
'i moderately prmineiit, and Fuftieicntly wcll
i shaped, is yet, a far as I know, anonymous,
ntthouga U be pet haps as common and as
well-lookirg a feature as is to be seen on an
KDglish free,
Altngot'ici they were a pair of comely mai
dens, arid Lcif g constantly attired in gar
ments of the same color and fafcbion, they
always looked so much alike that no stranger
ever dreamed of knowing them apart; and
even their acquaintances were rather accus
tomed to think and speak of them generally
as "the Evanses," than as the separate indi
viduals Jane an-J Fanny. Even those who
did preteud tu distinguish one from the ether
were not exempt from mistakes, which tho
inters. Fanny especially who delighted in
the fun so often produce! by the unusual re
semblance were apt to favor by changing
peaces in a walk, or slipping from one 6ide
to the other at a country tea-party, or play
ing a hundred itincctnt tricks to occasion at
once a grave and a merry laugh.
Old Tabitha Goodwin, for iuttance who,
being rather purblind, was jealous of being
suspected ef seeing l?ss clearly than her
m ijzhbors., Tind had diCed even the Evanses
to puzzle her 'discernment, soek'lng va vain
the cut '-.ngi r sn; had dressed on Janes, as
criboJ the incredible cure to the merits of
her own incomparable Falve, aud could hard
lv undeceived, eren 5y tho pulling off of
Jane's gl-'ve, nnd the exhibition of the lac
erated fii ger sewed rcund bj l:-c-rown ban-dajr-3
Young George Baily, too, the greatest
bc-au in the parish, having betted at a party
that lie Would duuee with everv rrcttv cirl
k ) merrv.
champagne !
than sh.vrry
poor brain.
in rks tl:;ir. the bottle's,
i ni rf lit'.wilderiuly crowned,
in thoir ravi.-lrno; thrrolt'ea
.3tr-'A:a that .1 sni;-j will cnfoimd.
.. r.i;ik!-s uk brutes, love is abltl
T.i turn !H to t'i.'!s wit', like e;isc;
,:tx l.tys us lui lor tho tabic,
f :i..u' bring? us at least to our knees.
ii'.'h' seiMO niisel.it f she's brewing;
,.cr tV. t s.tlic ;icu.iint;i!HO bob w;
.1 ' n no pretiant with rui'i,
A t!i"s hidden tnp-s of the toe.
A..1 :..xn 's. between courses at leisure-,
Mile ii'itii.Is wln-n there's no one to inavli,
A.! i-.-s :i"is "'.i yidd rapeb mulcr pressure
!"::) litigcis thus s'i'iKzed iu the dark.
A- ii -.iv r' i! tlie tojicr ui b. auty.
!l i, rims '-.i b'.s viae, poor elf!
i f.-urc 1 lii -'n'l.s ! lio.v hid duty
ir l u t-j take t..o of itself!
T sluks
li.i.v plnieti bis power,
rii'.M':'.ii at death's denr:
wmiri') j'nr ! f i 1 1 1 thus lower.
Siv, w';i:it .1:1 t'- !i.tt'u do Illort. 7
'' -vint ."o r.r lent as wo1
V.V.X o
Si. n'lrc t ) intoxicate man;
r i "ii-h is !eVrvrrr tremens,"
i. lit inl'ldflis him in ore thau it can.
;L:ice of her eye "blue ruin."
i'r blusli is the b'uod of the vine,
! -r pout is a punch in whoe brewing
T.i't, bii;;ar and spirit combine.
vp.vrling, so heating, so beady.
N t h'.iiu for hot victim appears;
-..nil hcrtiiKilca only rendur bim giddy,
iiu'.l he Mirtly bn drunk with her tears
A:-.e rape-juice of I'.ilen fnude Adam
SjsiupiJly forfeit Lisa!!;
lure ot his volatile ma:Um
tie room, :ost ms wager, which ranny
saucy daaisel slip-
.11:
in tip.-ily ou t j bis fall.
I.,
Me wiin-s ot tair t vr-vus :ne rover,
s" Mil'- as tue v.c.iion begiiile;
--' r re. -iuM-e. he is "EaT .- id i-i r,"
r..iv.i stir f.r s fatal isle.
o
lii'ilam :;uch a ti-nij'ter ns this If,
Nr.
' :..::iLii c .--O li izaidoiis court,
'..I'.uhed on the waves of her tresses,
:r:i vi: that he ventured fr.-m Port,
Er;iu r.eynold".-. Miso-l'nny.
THE FAMILY LJKEUESS.
The pretty Bpiare far m-biusc tunding ai
t turner, n Ltre Kibes hate cro?st-i tiio
k, or the brook cresses ivtbes Lane, (toe
.; 2r.t phrase, although giving by far the
set picture of the place, does, it must be
:.v8cd, look rather Irish,) and where the
tisaid brook win Is away by the side of au
r lane, until it c reads n.to a river-like
ktnty as it meanders lute the funny plain
Uautay Common, av.d unally disappears
enge ooo;
half hidden
the tail cltus in the fl-iwer court before it.
iii-Jft the creen recesses of
pretty souare farm-house
hsd overheard, by that
piug iuto her sister's ilaco, and pursuadirig
her to join her own unconscious partner; to
that George danced twice with ranny, aud
uot at all with Jan; a flattering piece of
mslicc which proved, as the young gentleman
( rustic ciquij-tte of the first water,) was
pleased to a?ert, that 31 if Fanny was not
displeased vith her partner. How little does
a vain mau know of wemankiud ! If she
had lived him. she would uot have played the
trick for the mines of Golconda.
In fhort, from their school-days, when
Jane was chidden for Fanny's bad wcrk, and
I'ainy-shipped for Jann'a bad spelling, down
to this their prime of womanhood, there had
be. n no end to t Lid coufusion produced by
thif. remarkable instance of family liktness.
And yet nature, who sets some mark of
individuality upon evi-u her meanest produc
tions, making some unnoted difference be
tween the robins bred iu one nest, the flow-
rs growing eu one fctalk, and the leaves
from one tree, had net left these
lens without one great and per
manent distinction a natural and striking
dissimilarity of temper. Ivpially industrious,
affectionate, hajpy and kind, yet each was
kind, happy, af.ectionafe and industrious in
a different waj-. Jane was grave; Fanny was
gay. If you heard a laugh or a song, be
sure it was Fannj; she who smiled, for cer
tain was Fanny, the who jumped the style
whtn her siiiers opened the gate was Fanny;
she who chased the pigs frcm the garden as
merrily as if she were running a race, so that
the very pigs did uot mind her, Tas Fanny.
Ua the other hand, she that was so care
fully making, with its own ravelled thiealp,
blended well with the sterling goodness and
genuine abundance of the English farmhouse:
The young women, especially, tplc&sei hiim
much. They formed -a ttroog 'contrast with
everything that lie had met with before. No
finery, no coquetry, no French, iio piano I
It i impossible to describe the sensation of
relief and -comfort "wifh 'which Charles Fors
ttr, sick cf musical misses, ascertained that
the whole dwelling did not contain a iingle
inetrument, except a bassoon, on. which
George Evans w&s wont every Sunday at
church to torment the cars of tho whole con
gregation Ho liked - both sisters. Jane's
softness and cocsidcrateness engaged his full
esteem, but Fanny's innocent playfulness
suited best his own high spirits and animated
conversation. He had known them apart
from the first, and indeed denied that the
likeness was at all puzzling, or more than is
usual between sisters, 'and secretly thought
Fanny as much prettier than her sister, as
she was avowedly merrier. In-doors and
out, he was continually at her side, and be
fore l:e had been a month in the house all its
inmates had given Charles Forster as a lavcr
to his young cousin; and she, when rallied
ou the subject, cried "fie!" and "pshaw!"
1 . . H 1 111 l
ana "nonsense : ana wonaerea now people
could talk such nonsense, though at the same
time she liked to have such nonsense talked
to her better than anything in the world.
Affairs were in this state when one night
Jane appeared even graver and more thought
ful than usual, and far, far eadder.
"ghed deepty; and Fanny, for tho two sisters
shsred tho same little room, inquired ten
derly, "what ailed her?" The inquiry secur
ed to make Jane worse. She burst into
tears, while Fanny hung over her aud sooth
ed her. At length she roused herself by a
strong effort, and turning away from her af
fectionate comforter, said in a low tone, "I
have been greatly. vexed to-night. Charles
Forster has asked me to marry him "
" CBai lea Forster ? Did you say Charles
ForsterV" asked poor Fanny, trembling, un
willing even to trust her own senses against
the evidence of her heart; "Charles Forster!"
she repeated. "And you have accepted him?"
asked Fanny, in a hoarse voice.
"Oh no, no, no!" said Jane. "Do you
think I have forgotten poor Archibald? Be
6ides, I am not the person he ought to have
asked to marry him. False and heartless as
he i, I could not be his wife; cruel, unfeel
ing, unmanly, as he has been ! No, not if
he could make me Queen of England !"
"You refused him, then?' said Fanny.
"iio; my father met us suddenly, just as I
was rt covering from the surpr'ue and indig
nation tk&t at first struck me dumb," replied
Jane. ' Hut I shall refuse him most cer
tainly the false, deceitful, ungrateful man!"
"My dear father," said Fnny; "ho will
be disappointed. So will my mother.'
"They will both he disappointed, Knd both
night's misery, to be compensated by a life
time 'of happiness. Jane was almostfas glad
to lose a lover as her sister was to regain one.
Charles is'gctee home to his father's to make
preparations; for his brida Archibald has
taken a great nursery garden ; and there is
some talk in Aberleigh that the marriage of
'the two sisters is to be celebrated ou tho
same day. .-. ;
From the llome Journal.
TALES OF THE SOUTH.
A SOCTIIERX MAN.
nan;
sngry, saiu Jane, "but not at niy rciuiai.
Oh, how they will despise him!" she added;
and poor Fanuy, melted by her sister's sym
pathy, and touched by au indignation most
unusual in that mild and gentle girl, could
i o longer command her feelings, but flung
herself on the bed in that agony of passion
and grief which the first great ecrrow seldom
fails to excite.
After awhile Fanny resumed the conver
sation. "We must not," the said, "blame
him too severely, Jane. Feihaps ray vanity
made me think, his attentions meant more
then they really did, and you had all taken
up the notion. But you must not speak of
h'm so unkindly; he has done nothing but
what is natural. You aru so much wiser and
better than I am, my dear Jane! lie laugh
ed and talked with me ; but he felt your
goodness; and he was right I was never
worthy of him, aud you are; and if it were
not for Archibald. I should rejoice from the
bottom of my heait," continued Fanny, sob
bing, "if you would accept ." But,
unable to finish the expression of her gener-
TUE REPORTER TO TUB SENATE.
J. II , of Alabama, is a humorist Ifcd a
practical joker, A blind phrenologist once
examining his head, declared that his organ
of humor was mountainously developed, and
that it had, in fact, swallowed up, or dwarfed
by proximity, all the neighboring bumps,
ltight or wrong in his theory, the phrenolo
gist was singularly correct, for once, at least,
in the portraiture of the leading intellectual
characteristic of his subject. J once for, by
that familiar abbreviation of his Christian
name he is best known among his friends
is the embodiment of frolic and fun . He looks,
speaks and acts the humorist. Leau and
gaunt in peison, cadaverous in .complexion
and wrinkled in visage, he resembles, for all
the world, an Egyptian mummy. He would
be irredeemably ugly were it not for his eyes,
f.i - which are black, piercing and full of the lire
kiie i . . i - ti t-
ot genius Ana a genras, as wen as a cuiv
alric gentleman, Jouce ttrot unquestionably
i3. lie writes well, speaks well, talks well,
and, in short, does all kinds cf brain-woik
well. He edits the best paper in the State,
gets off more jokes on friend and foe, and
tells more amusing tales than the Whole edito
rial fiaternity combined.
lie was once State Solicitor in one of our
circuits, and gained more verdicts from juries,
by his jokes and humor, than the best legal
abilities and acquirements. In fact, Joncc
and his terrible battery of fun and anecdote,
struck greater terror into evil-doers than the
fiercest anathemas of most eloquent philippics
of associate counsel for the prosecution, lie
quizzed the witnesses, bamboozled the oppo;
sing attorneys, poked his fun at the bench,
tickled the jury, and. many a time, got ver
dicts when he did cot deserve them on the
law and the facts of his case. His whole so
licitondiip was the Saturnalia of fun on his
circuit, and as lull ot lorensic mumpns ior
himself as it was ot laughter for the public,
and of fines of imprisonment for the accused.
Impelled by the optitude of his natural m-
stincta and endowments, Jonce wrote humor
ous talcs and sketches, all of considerable
merit, aud, at length, produced a book which
brought a grin to to the face of the country,
r m.: rvt: F-. TTn.1 ,.7.."
i .L . il - l- .1.
qvrt, wuicu is now iuc synonym iu me couiu
for a practical jokeo, lie embaime t old li. 1 ,
of Tallapoosa county, for humorous immor
tality lue victim, it is said, has never for
given his embalmer; but the book lives and
ranks deservedly as a classic m tue depart
ment cf letters to which it belongs.
But Jonce's great passion is for a practical
jotc one of those thunder-claps from the sky
of humor wuien overwhelm tue smitten party
with laughter, and shake the sides of the com
munity for a month afterwards with iuextin
guishable mirth. He will undergo any
amount of mental vigil aud bodily toil to get
up such a surprise aud carry it into success
ful execution. Being ot once fertile in the
invention and wonderfully adroit in the man
agement of practical jokes, he almost con
stantly has some affair of the sort ou baud,
and rarely fails to draw down a cachiunatory
explosion from any quarter iuto which he
chooses to sail one of his humorous kites
with tue ppacioui
garden and orchard
an
chief,
invitiole
.? arn tn tier metier d lianuker-
and bei'rir.g her little sitter read the
while; she that so patiently was feeding, one
T:i a Aberleich. the large and
'iffii.v ..f ir. - i'
'i i iimirt joain.
'Hc.her from Bkill or good furluue, or as
' "'-Si tirobabb' frnui a lnrkv miYtTit of
j
3 ivtr tiling goes right in his great farm.
tjfmrei .1.- I . .1. . I - I I
. t me nest iu iuo paniiu; uis uay
:SeT'r spoiled: his cattle never die: hischil-
""a ar0 never ill. Hp Imv Minn nrwl ti
it'ar; money gathers about htm like a
' j i v. it. buis ii-jivaiu
lutlerablo prosperity, everybody loves
-r r.vans he is so hr
-nJ, an J the extensire tarn-vard and out- t bv one. two broods of ouR2 lurkevs: she
iaps, so completely occupies one of the ' that so pensively was watering her own bed
;:i't f'Tmed by the crossing of the lane and of delicate aud somewhat rare plants the
s'.reatii that pretty farm-Louse contains j pale stars of the Alpine ink, or the alabaster
J of the happiest aud most prosperous fam- blossoms cf the white evening primrose,
l:mviii2 whose modest flowers, dviiitr oft into a blush.
resembled Lor own character was Jane.
Some of the gossips of Aberleigh used to
assert that Jane's sighing over the flowers, as
well as the early steadiness of her character,
arose from an engagement to my lord's head
gardener, an intelligent, 6edate and sober
young Scotchman,
Of this I know nothing. Certain it is that
the prettiest and newest plants were always
to be found in Jane's flower-border; and if
Mr Archibald Maclane did sometimes come
to look after them, I do not see that it was
auy business of anybody's. 1
In the mean time a visitor of a different
description arrived at the farm. A cousin
of Mrs Evans had been as successful in
trade as her hueband had been in agriculture,
and he had now sent his only son to become
acquainted with his relations, and to spend
some weeks in their family.
Charles Forster was a fine young man,
whoso father was neither more nor less than
a rich linen-draper in a great town; but whose
manners, education, mind, aud character
Hiight have done honor to a far higher sta
tion, lie wap, in a word, one of Nature's
gentlemen, and iu notliiug did he more thor
oughly show his own taste and good breed
ing than bj entering eutirely into the home
ly ways and old fashioned habits of his coun
try cousins. He was delighted with the
simplicity, frugality and- industry, which
ans he is so hosm table, go Pfn-
80 good-natured, so homely. There,
'-r U, lies thfi fh.irni Bielick lir n.-f
atpoiled the man, but thry LaTe not even
'itred !it,n it. . .i i t
manner, that ha was thirty years
"uta ue ana his wife, with two eorry
e, one cow, and three pigs, began the
tent1 Dea,,'s Gate- a litUo Largin of
y cres, two miles off. Aye, and his
w the same woman ! the same frugal,
ml TU,Strious' good-natured Mr. Evans,
Ut b a i , activity of tongue and limb,
good looks, and her plain dressing. She
-aiae Mr8, Kvaus at forty-five as the
&U,Uet anJ aUh h ju a jjjj- t
?. s good-looking
tl r children they Lad six "boys," as
. inner itc,..i ti . i -1 J '
r.M r . lu cau mem, wiiose ages
tfc'rJ e,g"t to efcht-and-twentv.
uree eirl. . e
Stk 11 ' two 8rown u
va-
tweuty, and
- ww, ouu uuc uqi yet
tfce junge of the family-are just
y- 1 f. tTc.T flirt tillTLt in fl frAcll tT,-V,-1 r r t
and the tisters, mutually and strongly affect
ed wept ia each other's arms, aud were com
forted. That night Fanoy cried herself to sleep;
but such sleep is not of long duration. Be
fore dawn, she was up. and pacing with rest
Icfs irritability the dewy grass walks of the
garden and oichard. lu Jess than half-an-hour
a light clastic sb-p (eho knew the sound
well) came rapidly behind her ; a hand (ah !
how often had she thrilled at the tocuh of that
hand 1) tried to draw hers under his own ;
whilit a well-kuown voice thus addressed her
in the softest and tenderest accents : "Fanny,
mv own sweet Fanuv! have vou thought of
what I said to you last night V"
"To vie T' returned Fanny, with bittei
ncss.
was the reply. "Do you not remember the
question 1 asked you when your father, for
the first time unwelcome, joined us so sudden
lv that vou had no time to say 'Yes?' And
will you not say 'yes' now ?"'
"Mr. Forster," renlicd Fanny, with some
spirit, "you arc under a mistake hero. It was
to Jane you made the proposal yesterday.
You are taking me for her at this moment." j
"Mistake you for your sister !'' exclaimed j
Charles. "I'ropose to Jane! Incredible I
You are surely jesting."
."Then he mistook me for Jane last night.
At the sesfiiou of 1857-8 of the Alabama
Lcislature," Joncc acted as reporter in the
rSenatc for his own paper. Ihe positiou ad-
.nits the one who hold3 it to a scat within the
bar of the Senate, and to constant, familiar
intercourse with the members. A man so
companionable and jocose as J once, of course,
soon became a prime favorite with the Sena
tors. He was, in fact, a sort of honorary
member of the body, without the right to
ppcak or vott; but by no moans without influ
ence in its deliberations. Ever ready, with
pen or counsel, to assist all who needed or
asked his help, ho combined and admirably
executed, the double function of a diligent re
porter and adviser in ordinary to the Senate.
Now, the individuals composing the Senate
of Alabama, however able in counsel or ac
complished iu the arts of debato, were never
theless but men, and subject, like tbe rest of
mankind, to the appetites and frailties of hu
manity. Being neither teetotallers nor iuo
briates, they relished, the most of them, at
least, an occasional infusion into their bever
age of that element which is warmer than tea,
and more exhilarating than coffee. The rig
or of the winter and the tedium of protracted
legislation, made moderate potation as harm
less to the;r consciences in an ethical, as it
was agreeable to their taste in a palatial
poiut of view. Besides the regular matutinal,
ante-prandial, post-prandial and vesper obla
tions made at the shrine of the ruddy god, by
a fow of the more devout of his senatorial de
intelligence ariS'deVotldi: to the duties of le
gislation. One day, during an unusually protracted ses
sion, the spirituous supplies in the cemmitte
rooms had all been exhausted. Owing to the
length of tho sitting and the torrid heat of the
debate, tbe mouths and throats of the Sena
tors patched with a thirst which water could
not assuage, and both their minds and bodies
needed tbe presence of the exhilarating com
forter. But the discussion was too interest
ing, and the presence of individual members
too important at the vote which was soon to
be taken upon the question coder debate, to
allow of temporary absence, farther than the
adjoining committee-room?, from the irenate
chamber.
In this emergency. Jonce "came to the re
lief of the exhausting Senators. l3e?patching
a messenger with instructions to bring Mai a
certain large black bottle, which was to be
found under a file of old papers, in one cor
ner of his editorial 'sanctum, he proceeded to
inform the members of the provision he was
making for their refreshment, more than half
the body accepting nis avitfttion to partake
of it as soon as it was receive!
In due time the messenger returned with
thfi bot'le, which was deposited in a recess in
one of the committee rooms. Jonce, officia
ting as host and master of ceremonies, tipped
the wink to the Senators, who repaired, in
companies of two and three, to the place ap
pointed, partook of the contents of the bottle,
and retHriicd with rueful faces, to their seats,
lu quick succession, all who had accepted the
invitation withdrew from the "chamber, im
bibed, and returned. A shade of thought
fulness settled upon tho brow of every one of
the drinkers, and a slight pallor, accompanied
by nervous twitel.i'igs at the corners of the
tno'wth, overspread their countenances.
It was rjca'wcd afterwards, bnt observed as
an act of considerate forbearance r.t the time,
prompted, as was then believed, by a desire
net to diminish the spirituous supplies of his
cuests, that Jonce did not himself partake of
the contents of the bottle, lie urged the
Senators, however, with hospitable importu
nity, to replenish their glasses, But no ono
vcuturcd a repeat. A majority of them gulp
ed down at a iingle swallow the potroa they
j had poured from the bottle. Some, with wry
taces, iooK. ineiia iu uiuai-u uiw. v-i
tasted and declined. All fe!t suspicions ;
many commented upon the peculiar flavor of
the liquor, and every one left the room with
a uauscous taste in his mouth, and a rapid
flow of saliva to his lips.
The debate, in the meantime, was approach
ing the Jinale of a Vote upon the measure
uudcr discussion. The refreshment of the
coaimittec-room had stilled, instead of quick
ening, the tongues of the imbibing Seuators,
among whom were included the leading dis
putants on both sides of the question. The
pause in the debate oon became as embar
rassing as it was surprising. It was like the
fcilcnce of d-ath falling suddenly upon the
uproar of clamorous life.
Unable longer to retain . their seats, natch
less to deliberate or to debate, the Senators
who had visited the committee room, rose,
one by one, seized their hats and hurried
from the chamber. As the debate seemed to
have come to a sudden conclusion a Senator,
one of the uninvited to Jonce's treat, called
for the final vote upon the question. It was
suggested and soon accrtained by a couut,
that a quoram was not prcsentv The door
keeper of th Sonata was soon dispatched to
recall the absentees, The partisan on each
side of the question about to be submitted to
a vote, anxious to rally all of their respective
forces, joiued iu tho hunt for their missing
comrades, leaving nearly cvey s?at vacant in
the Senate II all.
The fugitive Secators were soon found.
Around the rear corners of the Capitol build
ings, in sheltered nooks upon the surrounding
campus, and in every hiding-place about tbe
premises, there they were some prostrate on
the grouud, others perched on extempore scats
and not a few, though still on foot, leaning in
most devotional attitudes, and all of them
with rueful faces aud Jo!oro3 complaints,
like a regiment of cholera patients. The
spectacle was ludicrous Lej-ond expression
The searching party greeted the absentees
with peals of laughter. The news spread;
the crowd and the merriment increased apac
and the capitol hill of Alabama rang with
laughter.
The cause of this senatorial upheaval wa
rcadll3' traced A powerful emetic had been
mixed in the brandy, of which the Senators
had nartaken in the committee-room. Jonce
averred then, and avers to this day, that the
mixture had been prepared for a sick servant,
and that the messenger brought him, by mis
take, the wrong bottle. Tbo law and the
testimony, however, dcdufible from all the
facts of the case, and especially from his own
frolicsome character, arc agaiust his solution.
But be had the marvellous address to make
it entirely credible to the victims, and so he
retained both his popularity and Lis position
as reporter to the Souate.
votees, there were occasional acknowledg
ments of his claims made by nearly all of the
Senators, ,in the recess of the committee rooms
adjoining the chamber of the Senate. These
interluded acts of homage, rather furtive in
nnd hp ia no deceiver thought rannv to
nr-oif s. with Kii.ilfR h.iminrr lrtrhtlv i ilinnictpr. were rendered daring soma dull
through her tears, she turned round a his j protraction of debate or some exhausting ma
reiterated prayers and entreaties, and yielded
the hand he so eagerly sought. "He mistook
her for aie Le
ham 1"
And so it was ; an unconscious and unob
served change of place, as cither sister re
sumed her station behind littleBetsey, who
had scampered away, after a ; glow-worm,
added to the deepening twilight and the
lover's natural embarrassment, bad produced
The Happy Typo.
A cheerful temper is a natural gift, the de
sirability of which cannot be questioned, tut
seldom do wo meet with a spirit so thoroughly
saturated with good nature that m disap-
pointmcnt. no poverty, deprivation or 'combi
nation of adverse circumstances C3a break ft
down or overcome its geniality.
A few days ago a man made his "appearance
before Justice Brensan, "who seemed to Tiato
a perfect fountain -of "undiluted contentment
somewhere in his composition, which rio de
pressing influence of care or accident Tiad
been able exhaust or adulterate a type
a modern addition of Mark Tapley a huurari
barrel of joliincss without hoops on. lie walj
arrested for being intoxicated. He gave his
name as Getephat Take, said ho was a "prin
ter, and hailed from "The Gem of Science"
office; isa short man of beer cask figure, and
a face a3 rubicund as if Le slept in a room
with red curtains. His answer to 1ti exer
tions of the authorities showed his content
ment under all shades of fortune. The Jus
tice beiDg alsi in a good humor, was inclined
to banter the disciple of Ben Franklin, and
accordingly addressed Lim as follows:
Judge "Well, Mr. Tako, it seems you
have thrown aside the 'composing stick,' and
gone to getting drunk for a living. I am
afraid you're a 'bad trase,' and sfand in need
of 'correcting.' I think I shall end yen th
'quod.'"
These tecnicalities which were uttered in a
tone of yon-see-l-know-your-tradc-as-well-as-yoa-do
air, seemed to give Mr. Take the ar
surance which printers seldota lack-, but of
which, the solemnities of a Police 'Court tniglit
temporarily havo deprived hini od he an
swered: Prisoner. "Well, at any faVe, T am s;lad
we have nc 'galleys in thiscclutry, or 1 I'ip--pose
you would 'empty' me there, and 'weil
leaded' at that. But bless you, sir, going to
jail's nothing; tho last time I was there I
tamed a 'rat' and taught him to chew tobacco,
besides iuventing ihree new steps for horn
pipe it's a good deal better than Setting
'solil miuion,' more than three quarters "fig
ure work,' and getting only a 'price and a
hall for it. Lord bless you, Squire. I'd a
gr.at deal rather go to jail for ten days than
not. I've got sick of work just now and 111
have a chance to got the bile off my stomach."
Jailjc "You seem to take it easy; how do
you propose to employ your time this trip':'
Prisoner "Well, Corporal, I'm undecided
whether I'll learn to whistle the opera of th
'Bohemian Girl,' practice standing on rsy
head, or undertake to acquire the elegant ac
complishment of balancing straws on my nose.
If I could get a eat, I'd teach her to play the
fiddle, if I thought the strings wovldu't re
mind her unpletsai tly rf intestinal diicord,
after her feline body has been niLe times
slain."
Judjs "Mr. Take, you seem particularly
happy under the circumstances; have you go
a wife?'
Priaontr "2ot now. Lieutenant. I Lad
one, bu t she ran off with a bow-lsgged cob
bler. I was to glad about it I sent her Lor
dresses and quit claim deed of Ler person,
signed in capital letters. SLc left me ono
boy, but be was "foul proof net a bit like
me; I bound him 'prentice to the type-sticking
trade, but the first day he quarrelled with
the regular 'devil. He dropped the 'shoot
ing stick' into the 'alligator p ress,' aud iu the
evening he and another hopeful boy were
rehearsing a broad-sword cambat with &
couple of 'column rules ' The foreman 'bat
tered' him with a 'mallet,' and when ho got
home he had a 'fancy head,' if ever there was
ono."
Clerk. " 'Where is he now?"
Prisoner "He ran away with a circus,
and the last I saw 6f him ho was in the mid
dle of a sawdust ring, trying to tio his legs
in a bow-knot round Lis neck. I've been
jollier since than ever before."
Judge. "You feem to bo always jolly.
Prisoner. "So I am I laughed when
my father turned me out of doors at eleven
years old laughed when I broke my arm,
and made funny faces at the doctor while ho
was setting it, The happiest day I ever spent
was one time when I hadn't but one shirt and
a pair of pants to put on, anl had spent all
the money I had, and gone hungry forty hours.
I uever was really unhappy but once ia my
life, and that was when I fell down stairs,
fractured my collar bone's anl skinned my leg
so baJIy that I couldn't get on my ue?a t-j
thank God I hadn't broken my neck."
The Judge relented and let Mr. Take go.
and that profound individual loft the room
trying to whistle and sing tt the same time,
and also to dance an independant jig with
each
leg to a different tune.
nceuvre of parliamcntray tactics, and gentr-
ally'by only two or three Senators At a time,
that defied us to perplex j who quietly left their scats, improved the mo
ment of absence, ana as quicuy reiurueu.
The supplies for these stolen interviews were
drawn from bottles and jwtit jugs, which
feund their way into the committee-rooms by
means known only to tho initiated Despite
all this, however, bo it remembered, the Sen
ntA nf Alabama, durinz the bession of 1857-S
was distinguished, as a body, for sobriety,
tbe confusion which caused poor Fanuy a
A Good Ski.l. A Broadbrim owned a
most beautiful horse. A gentleman saw" him
in the pasture, wished to purchase him, aud
asked the Friend if ho could go well.
"Go I" said Broadbrim, "it wouU delight
theo to seo him go."
The gentleman therefore purchases him.
harnesses hin before hi:'- wagcri, but, to his 1
surprise, he is immovable as tho Alps. He-.
t-1i.io ta wlwn l.llf nfm tlllri flirt linrcn '
"ft""-0 "" " l " v v.w
is as still as death.
He then cries to the Quaker
"Look here, Shadbelly, you havo cheatod
me; you said this horse would go
"Nav. friend,' sud the
A Torcmsa Dixit in Pnost. When
Scth got Lome from mackrling Le sought his
Sarah Anu, and found that she, thi heartless
one, had found another man And then most
awful tight he got, and so Le went away, nd
bound Limself for to cut oak all down ia Flor
iday. lie pined upon the live oak laud, ha
murmured in the shades; his are grew heavy
in his hand, all Tn the will-wood glades.
Mosquitoes bit bim everywhere; no comfort
did he get; and oh, how terribly he'd scold
whenever he got bit. At last, despairing of
relief, and wishing himself dea l, he went into
the wood a-picrs
head.
and chopped off his own
HSU An eld rod house ttimling near tho
line of tho Troy nnd Boston llailway. is loca
ted in two States, three counties, and four
townships the States of New York and Ver
mont, tho counties of Keuselear, Washington
1 and Bennington, the townships of Hoosack.
, i t iiM u. ri 1 PI .f. i 1 t .
luaaer; uia I j iiiic vrces, ouaus?ary ami lK'uuuguiu.
not tell thee it would delijt thee to see him Twould tako a sharp officer to arrest the oo
go? and I hope thee may have that ploasuro " cupant of that house.
And with tins lie Lett, tlie sporting gem to i
i .. . i .... i. - i i !
get over uis as uci. uci-vum.
Au iulcrcstincr t tic the cvniiV
fir A Knn.lful f Virnniixi.il tnixAil f'i-:l .
( ms ........ - . -
nonally iu the mess of a cow, will py tcu
fold its cost in the riciness cf the milk.
a O
no