t?
J, J If
PfljiJiilJiJvJi
mi
11 -
THB BLKS3UTO3 OF GOTKBiTKBHT, UMM TH DKWB OF HKATKSf, SHOULD EB DliTT.IBCTKD ALUS VTP03 THE HIGH AJTO TSB LOW, TUB MOT AXD TTJ POC3U
HEW SERIES.
BBESSBURG, IUIIBSIUYJPE1L 6, 185.
1 KG. 30
I lei If
Hi m m
4
l
1
T B it 91 8:
She DEMOCRAT & SENTINEL is published every
Thursday moraing, in Ebensburg, Cambria Co.
Pa., at $1 50 per ana am, if paid in advance, if
not 2 Till be charged.
ADVERTISEMENTS will be conspicuously inser
ted at the following rates, vis i
1 square 8 insertions 91 00
Every subsequent insertion 25
1 square 8 months 8 00
e 6 00
" 1 yea 8 00
column 1 year 18 00
. 30 00
Business Cards with 1 copy of tho Democrat
j Sentinel per year 5 00
Sga Letters must be post paid to secure attention.
Original nub gtltct otlrg.
Written Jor the Democrat ami Sentinel.
"Must all Things Fade and Die."
Must all ..things fade and die,
Which heaven to earth hath given,
MustTall things neath the sky,
By time's rale hand be riven 1
Tho rose upon the stem,
Will bloom but for a day,
And then, like'kopes of men,
Twill wither and decay.
The scenes of smiling spring,
Bring gl adness to our hearts.
T hea birds their requiem sing,
And Spring again dep arts.
When youth and love are past,
And Time's bright dreams are ficd.
The grave appears at last,
And all are with the dead.
But faith,the poor man's treasure.
Is given from above,
Tor to fulfill the measure
Of never ending lore.
And the stroke to mortals given,
Is by a loving hand,
For to repieaishTieaven.
With a pure angelic band.
Cambria co., Pa. Aiaaois.
WOMAN.
Who in this world of care and strife,
Doth kindly cheer and sweeten life
As friend, companion, and as wife ;
'Tis Woman.
Who, by thousand tender
- xy ronu endearment and by smiles.
Oar bosom of its grief beguiles ;
'Tis Woman.
From whence do all our pleasures flow ;
Who draws the scorpion sting of woe,
And makes the heart with transport glow I
. ' 'Tis Woman.
Who of a nature more refined
Doth soften man's rude stubborn mind
And makes him gentle, mild and kind ;
'Tis Woman.
When hours ot absence past we meet,
Say, who enraptur'd runs to greet
Our elad return with kisses sweet ;
6 'Tis Woman.
Who in a word, a touch, a sih,
The simple glancing of her eye,
Can fill the soul with escistacy ;-
Tis Woman.
Eden she lost ensnar'd by vice ;
But well has she repaid its price ;
For earth is made a paradise ;
'Tis Woman.
From the Oskaloosa Herald.
THE PRINTER'S TOIL.
Blow, ye stormy winds of winter ;
Drive the chilly, drifting snow ;
Closely housed the busy printer,
Heeds not how the winds may blow.
Click, click, his types go dropping,
Here and thers upon tho case,
As he stands for hours, popping
Every letter in its place.
Heaven send the useful printer
Every comfort mortals need;
For our nights were dull in winter,
Had we not the news to read.
Sad would be the world's condition,
If no printer boys were found ;
Ignorance and superstition,
Sin and suffering would abound.
Tea, it is the busy printer,
Rolls the car of knowledge on;
And a gloomy mental winter,
Soon would reign if ho were gone.
Money's useful yet the minters
Fill not half so high a place.
As the busy, toiling printers,
Fing'ring type before the case.
Yet, while type they're busy setting,
Oft some thoughtless popinjay,
Leaves the country kindly letting
Printers "whistle for their pay."
O, Ingratitude ungracious ?
Are there on enlightened soil,
Men with m:nd3 so incapacious
As to slight the printers toil ?
6ee him how extremely busy, ..
Fing'ring type before the case,
Toiling till hes almost dizzy,
To exalt the human race.
Long live the art of prirting,
. Llere on happy Freedom's soil,
And with joys that know no stinting,
Ik rtwvd U Pri&tar'f toil I
Safes unb J5fcfftus.
A TURILUXO SKETCH.
THE MANIAC;
Or, the Longest Night In a Life.
CONCLUDED.
They parted ; the door was locked outside ;
the key taken out ; and Miss Stirling, standing
by the window, watched her friend cross the nar
row black path, which had been swept clear of
snow to make a dry passage from the house to
the pavilion. A ruddy light streamed from the
hall door as it opened to admit its mistress, and
gave a cheerful friendly aspect to the scene ; but,
when the door closed and shut out that warm
comfortable light, the darkened porch, the pale
moonlight shimmering on the shrouded trees, and
the stars twinkling in the frosty 6ky, had such
an aspect of solitude as to cast over her a kind of
chill that made her half repent having consented
to quit the house at all, and let herself be locked
up ia this lonely place.
Yet what had she to fear ? No harm could
happen to her within the chamber ; the door was
safely locked outside, and strong iron staunche
ens guarded the window ; there could be no pos
sible danger. So drawing her chair once more
to the fire, and stirring it into a brighter blaze,
she took up a little Bible which lay on the dress
ing table, and read somo portions of the New
Testament.
When she laid down the book, she took out tho
comb that fastened up her long, dark, silken tres
ses in which, despite her five and thirty years,
not a silver thread was visible and, as she ar
ranged there fur the night, her thoughts strayed
back to the old world memories which her meet
ing with Mary Athcrton had revived. The sound
of the clock striking two was the first thing that
recalled her to her present life. By this tif.e the
candles were burned down almost to tho socket,
end the lire was dying fast. As she turned to
fling a fresh log into the grate, her v. . f upon
the dres ing-glass, rid in its reSection she sr,
or at least fancied she saw, the bod curtains
stood for a moment gazing at the mirror,
expecting a repetition of the movement ; but all
was still, and she blamed herself for allowing
nervous fears to overcome her. Still, it wa an
exertion, even of her brave spirit, to approach
the bed and withdraw the curtains. She was re
warded by finding aotliiug save the bedclothes
folded neatly down as if inviting hw in press the
snow-white sheets, and a luxurious pile of pil
lows that looked most tempting. She could not
resist the mute invitation to rest her wearied
limbs. Allowing herself no time for futber doubts
or fears, she placed her candlo on the mantel
piece, and stepped into bed.
She wa? very tired, her eyes ached with wear
iness, but sleep seemed to fly from her." Old re
collections thronged on the memory, thoughts
connected with the business she had still to get
through, haunted her ; and difficulties that had
not occurred to her till now arose up before her.
She W33 restless and feverish : and the vexation
of feeling so, made her mora wakeful. Perhaps
if h were to closs the curtains between ' r.r.l
the fire she might be bitter ah'c to- sleep the
flickering liy'it disturbed her, and the moon beards
stealing between the window-curtains cast ghost
ly shadows on the wr.il. So, she carefully shut
out the lislit on that side, and turned again to
sleep. Whether she had or had not quite lost
conciousness she could not well remember, but
she was soon -thoroughly aroused by feeling the
bed heave under bc-r. She started up, and awaited
with a beating heart a repetition of the move
ment, but it did not come. It must have been a
return of the nervous fancies which had twice
assailed her already that night. Laying Ler
head once more on the pillow she determined to
control her groundless terrors
Again she started up !
This time there could
be no doubt ; the bed had heaved more than once,
accompanied by a strange gurgling sound as if of
a creature in pain. Leaning on her elbow, she
listened with that intensity of fear which desires
almost a3 much as it dreads a recurrence of the
sound that caused it. It came again, followed
by a loud rustling noise as if some heavy body
were dragged from under the bed in the direction
nf the fire. What could it be f
She longed to
01 tne nre. - - o -
call out for help, but her tongue clave to the roof
of her mouth, and the pulse in 1
fcor tmnToa tV,rr,K.
bed until she felt as if their painful beating sound
ed in the silence of the night like the loud tick
of a clock.
The unseen thing dragged itself along until it
reached the hearthrug, where it flung itself down
with violence. As it did so she heard the clank
of a chain. Her breath came less painfully as
she heard it, for it occurred to her that it might be
nothing worse than the house dog, who, haviDg
broken his chain, bad sougne bnoiie-i ucumui
bed in the warm room. Even this notion was
disagreeable enough, but it was as nchmg to tne
vaue terror which had hitherto oppressed tier.
She nersuaded herself that if sue lay quite quiei
no harm would happen to her, ana tno uignt
mt : ..u
. . . i
would soon pass over. Anus rcMouiug, ouo
herself down again. "
By-and-by the creaturo began to snore, and it
struck her feverish fancy that the snoring was
not like that of the dog. After a little time, she
raised herself gently, and with trembling hands,
drew back an inch or two of the curtain and
peered out, thinking that any certainty was bet-
ter than sacn terrioie suspense, one looicea to
wards the fire-place, and there, sure enough, the
huere creature lay : a brown hairy mass, but of
what 6hap" it was impossible to divino, so fitful
was the lieht. and sc strangely was it coiled
on the hearthrug. By-and-by, U began to stretch
iUel out, to open its eys, which ahcoo in
flickering ray of the fire, and to raise its paws
above its hairy head
Good God ! these are not paws ! They ore hu
man hands ; and dangling from the wrists hang
fragments of broken chains !
A chill of horror froze Ellen Stirling's veins as
a flash of the expiring fire showed her this clear- r
ly far too clearly and the conviction seized upl
on her mind that she was shut up with an esca- !
ped convict. An inward invocation to Heaven
for aid, rose from heart, as with the whole force
of her intellect, she endeavor to survey tho dan
ger of her position, and to think of tho most
persuasive words she could use to the man into
whose power, she had so strangely fallen. For
the present, however, she must be still, very still;
she must make no movement to betray herself;
and perhaps he might overlook her presence until
daylight came, and with it, possibly help. The
night must be far spent ; she must wait, and
hope.
She had not to wait long. The creature mov
ed again stood upright staggered towards the
bed. For one moment one dreadful moment
she saw his face, his pale pinched features, his
flashing eyes, his black bristling hair ; bat, thank
God! he did not see her. She shrunk behind
the curtains ; he advanced to the bed, slowly,
hesitatingly, and the clauking sound of the bro
ken chains fell menacingly on her ear. He laid
his hand upon the curtains, and, for a few mo
ments fumbled to find the opening. These mo
ments were all in all to Ellen Stirling. Despair
sharpened her senses : she found that the other
side of the bed was not set so close against
the wall but that she could pass between. Into
the narrow space between, she coutrived to slip
noiselessly.
She had hardly accomplished the difficult feat,
and sheltered herself behind the curtains, when
the creature flung itself on the bed. and drawing
the bedclcths round him, uttered a sound more
like the whinnying of a horse than the laugh of
a human being.
For some little time Miss Stirling stood in her
narrow hiding-place, trembling with ccld and
terror, fearful lest seme unguarded movement
should betray her, and bring down on her a fate
she dared not comtemplate. She lifted up her
heart in prayer for courpge ; and when hc-r com
posure Lad in some degree returned, it occurred
to her that if she could but reach the window?
she might from that position, possibly attract
the attention of some passers-by, and be releas
ed from her terrible durance.
Very cautioueT she attempted the perilous
experiment ; her bare feet moved noiselessly a
cross the floor, and a friendly ray of moonlight
guided her safely towards the window. As she
put out her hand towards the curtains, her heart
gave a fresh bound of terror, for it came in con
tact with something soft and warm. At length,
however, she remembered that she had flung
down her fur cloak iu that spot, and it was a
mercy to come upon it now, when 6he was chil
led to the bone. She wrapped it round her and
reached the window without further adventure,
or any alarm from the occupant cf the bed ; whose
heavy regular breathing gave assurance that he
was now sound asleep. This was some comfort,
and she creatly needed it. The look-out from
the window was anything but inspiring. The
stars still bhonc peacefully on the sleeping earth;
the moon still showed her pallid visage ; not a
sight or 60und presaged dawn ; and after long
listening in vain for any sign of life in the outer
world, she heard the stable clock strike four.
Only four !
She felt as if it were impossible to survive
even another hour of terror such as 6ho had
just passed through. Was there not any hope ;
None.
She tried to support herself against the win
dow-frame, but her fcrst touch caused it to s.'iauo
and creak in a manner that seemed to her start- j
lingly loud ; she fancied that the creature moved
uneasily on its bed at the sound. Drops of ago-
n7 leu "miicr Uiuv , -
wore heavily on; ever and ar.oa e rustle c! tne
bed-clothes, or a slight clank of the manacled
hands, sent a renewed chill to the heart.
The clock struck five.
Still all without was silent. Suddenly, a man's
whistle was heard in the court, and the driver of
the mail-coach, lantern in hand, crossed the yard
towards the pavilion. Would to God she could
call to him, or in any way attract his attention !
t k th slightest sound. fle
" sno ?
I JOOKea up fc uk "o-"- " "
most brushed in passing ; and tho light he held
flashed on Miss Stirling's crouching figure He
paused, looked again, and seemed about to speak
when she hastily made signs that he should be
silent but sek: assistance at tb.9 house. Ij
gave her a glance of intelligence and hastened
How long his aosence seemctj iyouiu uau
unAi-tstood her ? The occur. -t The bed was
growing eTery instant more and more restless ;
he was rjsing from the bed He was gropin
nd tfce rocm. They would como too late, too
l&Uj ,
But nQ , gteg in tj,e courtyard the key turn-
. . lh iocfc the door opens then witn a
i I o ...... ...
that railg ;a Ejen gairliDg's ear until her Uy-
I J .... .... ,
i . the crcature rushed to ner nicung-piace
J dashed the slight window-frame to pieces, and
J finding himself baulked of his purposed esCipe
j v. tne strength of the iron bars outside, turned,
j a yld beast, on bis pursuers. She was the
rgt on wbom his glance fell. lie clasped her
nroat ; Lis face was close to hers ; his glittering
eg were glaring at her in frenzy ; when a blow
filled him.
sko iiurnke from a lone swoon vo naa ucrseu
v . H t IK
'
safe in Mrs. Atherton's dressing-room, and to
hear that no one was hurt but the poor maniac,
up andthat he was again in the charge of his keep-
j ers from whom ho had escapad ft fw hours be-
the for.
"A ; -.- :, vs ! A lifctinie, Mary ! But Hea
ven be thanked, it is past like a wild dream !"
It was not all past. One enduring effect remain
ed, ever after to imprint on Ellen Stirling's mem
ory, and on the memories of all who knew her,
the event of that long night. Such had been her
suffering, anxity and terror, that in those few
hours her hair had turned as white as snow.
Household Words.
A Great Sbow.
O.tx cr II: b Cage. There was agrcat commotio-
irrSrcadway about 11 o'clock Monday night
t.-rT?bnd reason fur it a wild animal was cut
.'hU cage. Such a crowd, shouting, hallooing,
fcLuving, pushing, ' "' - g inning, as we
ran into on cur way up tho sidewalk on the west
r.ido, somewhere near tho Brcdway Theater,
where our reader may recollect seeing a very
Lire cotton sheet, upon which is j ainted fn -!. -T'v.ut,
appearantly about six feet lS:;h, toeing
nbr it sundry lions and other small animals, such
as a rhinoceros of about three tons weight togeth
er with the bipeds, mixing the whole np into "one
grand menagerie."
Whether the whole are tied together with a
knot of boa constrictors, we do not now recollect,
but it is a terrible picture, and sundry passen
f rs have grown very nervous for fear one of
those voracious "hanimals" should walk out of
. T-w'ire and eat rip all the cnp'.e women f: r--!?
rft" the great dust tcrncdo in that str- r -.
f .VjT- c'fr.c'.td or.e'of the same sort in th
elf pbant's native land.
It did appear that this fear was about to be
realized tho oilier night, for tho cry was "The
ni.inoccrc3 is cut of his "ca?e." There were
hundreds of men, each one trying r-t a look
dov-n the open ccllarway to see what would he
the result, whether theTllaphant would rr.t the
Rh;3occros, or whether he would pick him up
vrit'a h:s trunk and throw him out of his under
grnnd gas-lighted apartment among the '- owd
in the 6treet. Nobody seemed to anticipate that
the Rhinoceros, ugly as he is, was going to hock
ths Elephant to death, in a fair fight ; yet every
one who could not get near enough to see seemed
to ihink there wa3 a great fight going on down
lh J-e, because there was a great r.oie, an.? those
who could see raid that great ltt was out cJ
hi:'.'v;sc, and there was a groat fuss generally.
"What if-he should coiueout into the street ?"
said somebody.
fLet him com?," said somebody clse and
pveMy ;:vn iii: uiu cnnc, np-nt ont among
tne i
crowd, and started off up Broadway as fast m a
horse could walk, the great ugly beast ; and then
suck a shouting and running away of the people;
it was decidedly the richest wi'd-beast show we
have ever seen.
Liirrah, said eve .-Iwdv.
"And no body hurt : did he '.ill nobody ?"
"?o, ma'am, not a soul."
"Oh dear, that was clever. Y.'.is he pc-r;-tle?"
"Yes ma'am, entirely. IIo never kicked while
a hundied men with rocs pulled him o t cf the
cellar into the street and on to a dray."
"Dear me how aentlo. And what became of
him fit last 1"
"Cannot say m-am, though a hoy pa;d, (but
he v.- s a vc--y o:ki i;'y, wun a great t;g i.:'ck
bnslfy Lead, with a cigar in his mouth, and nol
to be believed.) that they were going totakchim
to a bol'igna-Eauscge manufactory up in Dog
town." "Oh fugh ! Was he dead ?"
"Oh yes, ma'am, dead as Crystal Palace stock;
and sold to Barr.um, who declares that he can
galvanise niorc lifo into his dend carcase than he
can into that. lie- h-,s his thick huo off before
this time, and dene vr with forty pounds f tr
senit, end jrmcbocly is X'ickinghis bones, and a
few Morr hs hence you may see him in the Muse
um just :.3 good as new, and a great deal more
durable. Viva la Rhinoceros. A has Bologna
sausages 1" Xcw Yo.l: Trihune.
Ariat-rccted Candidate.
The follow ing is the card of u candidate for jus
tice of the peace in Pnlcstino, Texas :
Fellow-Citizens With the assurance of this
sheet is unfurled to the breeze, whether in tem
pest or calm, my name before you as a candidate
for the office of Chief Justice of Anderson county,
at the ensuing August election. I do it from
choice, not from solicitation. I do it, for the of
fice is honorable and profitable. I feel myself
competent to discharge the duties of the office.
I claim no superior merit or qualifications over
any one else who may choose to run against mc.
I wcj;.:13 like to run the race solitary and alone ;
h-A it aay "e desirous , let them pilch iu it isn't
uevT. 1 ii:i:;u Ui:-iuu.tu, t iiUi:ie-".eeu, iiuuju-
- t . i ,i n . j . j . j i , i
Bhouldered upon the platform of free rights and
true republicanism. Iu poiiuc3, I zm opposc-d
to tha present Legislature in favor of Texas and
her citizens. Opposed to telegraphs, i. c. on the
time extension 6cale a right up and down all
over railroad men; but not at all of the twenty
section stripe. Finally, fellow-citizens, if you
elect me your Chief Justice, I will make the very
welkin ring in loud huzza ! huzza ! for the sov's
of Anderson count y ! If defeated, I will retire
with dignity and perfect good humor, remember
ing a most beautiful little song which I will
sing remarkably well, called "I'm afloat, I'm
afloat," &c. I hope ere long to see you face to
face.
A. G. CANTLEY.
The new Catholic Church in Lancaster was
dedicated by solemn and interesting ceremonies
on Sunday last, by tho Rt. Rev. Mr. Neamann
Bishop of tho Diocess.
OCT Excuses are the pickpockets of time. The
sun does not wait for his hot water, or his boots
bat gets up onoo.
Ecrstrcaau's Factory.
Of all the great manufacturing cities in our land
none present stronger evidences of the importance
of American manufactures, their rapid progress
and generous appreciation, than our sister city,
Philadelphia. As one of the most prominent
landmarks in the march to industrial indepen
dence, we have the pleasure to present onr reders
with the accompanying beautiful engraving so
skillfully executed by our artist, Mr. Dcvereox.
The establishment of the Messrs. Horstina.cn is,
without exception, the largest, most complete and
ornamental structure ever erected in our country
for manufacturing purposes exhibiting the per
fection to which brick architecture may be
brought.
The fronts on both streets, Fifih and Cherry,
are seventy-two feet high, fuccd with pressed
brick, and erected after designs, and under tho
direction of the architect, Mr. I. C. Iloxie. Over
the main stairway rises a tower one hundred and
twenty-four f-el high above the side walk, built
or bncii, ana quite ornamental. j.ue ironts are
handsomely constructed, with projecting anteas,
corbel courses, deep recessed and circle headed
windows, that give to the building a bold and ef
fective appearance.
Nearly two millions of brick were u -i i s
construction. The walls are twenty--ight inch
es thick, and no plaster is used on them ihey
being finished as smooth oa the inner as t . . -tr
sido. The steam engine is cu the vertical, low
pressure trunk system, and is capable of being
worked to one huudred aal six'' horse-power.
The interior of this great structure is supplied
with all the convenienses and improvements of
modern science in lighting, heliug, and ventil
ation fofthc comfort cf the five or six hund: od
persons therein employed. The cost of ercctio i
lias exceeded SK-O.tR'O. The Messrs. II? . : D
have been bag celebrated as extensive
t'rcrs , ;r.,..v Ec.-,.is and passo '
business having b : ' hack as
1815. They also manufacture carriage laces and
trimmings, tailors', curtain, uphV.stcry and blind
trimtnings, and quilted cloak bindings etc. The
capital employed in their business i3 about half a
million of dollars. GLason's Pictorial.
A Holy War.
Russia is usi-.ig every device to give the char
acter of a holy war to the : - s- ! ties, a .1 e sol
diers are told they are on the way to rescue
I Christ's Senulchre hx m the Infidels. Ti e ratn-
- arch iif Moscow Lad issued an address to tbesixtn
...
corps, on ! aving fi.r the Danube, of nuicb tbc
following is a tra l.slalion :
"Children of the Czar, our father, and of Rus
sia our mother ! our brothers of the army ! the
Czar, the country and Christianity call upon you.
The prayers of the church and the Ciiui.'.ry ac
company you. Russia is again provoked by an
memy who was vanquished under Catherine II.
under Alexander I, and uuicr Nicholas I. Al
ready have your brothers revived the old habit of
b-ating him by land aud by sea. If it be decreed
by Providence that ycu are to see the enemy be
fore you, roe-iilect, then, that you are fighting
for the mst pious of Czars, for your dear coun
try, for the h .ly churolu against the persecutors
.f Christianity, ag.uust the profuuers of the ho
ly aud L'tcrited cities, which have seen the birth
the Tjfission and the rtiurrcclion cf Christ.
4
Now, if ever, victory, glory, Ixncdiction and e-
ternal benediction are but to those who give their
life for their faith in God, for their faith to their
Czar End their country.
'By fsith you will gain victory. (Hebrews
hap. ii, 13,) You likewise, will r uer ly
f:iith. Wc bid you farewell, with onr prayers,
and with the symbol of our faith. Carry with
yon aud rc-.V.'cet the warlike and victorious
speech of the C,:ar Pronhet, David : 'Salvation
and lory is iu God,' (Pf.alm 41st."
Sizu of our UitsAt Lakes. ' ??. n-?x
uremcnts cf our fresh water ses are these :
The greatest length of Lake Superior is 335
miles; its greatest breadth is ICO miles; mean
depth 9S8 feet; elevation C27 feet; area 32,000
square miles.
The greatest length of Lake Michigan is 300
miles; its greatest breadth 103 miles;mean depth
900 feet; elevation 587 feet; area 23,000 square
miles.
The greatest length of Lake Huron is 200 miles;
its greatheat breadth is 160 miles; mean depth
000 fe-et ; elevation 574 feet; area 20,000 square
miles.
The greatest length of Lake Eric is 250 rsilcs;
its greatest breadth is SO miles; its aican depth
.5 84 feet ; elevation 555 feet; area 6,000 square
The greatest lenrth of Lake Ontario ia 180
miles; greatest bred h C5 miles; its mean depth
is 500 feet; elevation 2C2 feet; 0,000 square
miles.
The total length of all five is 1,585 miles, cov-
c-ring an area aitogetner ox v.pwaro oi vv.uvu
square miles.
O A preacher in the "far west," gave out
for his text a certain chapter and verse in Clover,
The Deacon arose ane told him it was Timothy
'Oh yes, replied the Divine, its Tirr othy ; I
knew it was some kind of grass.
BT7" It is generally allowed that there is more
cf what is called chlrclled beauty in America
than in Europe.
A who chonned e.ffhi Lar.d the ether
day, while cutting wood, fient to an apothecary
for a remedy for "chopped hands.
The man who is ' a stronger to the finer
Mia," pvopef t have an introduction.
IIavb too- zvca Batx waiLwanD ! Thrr
was much pnxxling of strange voters at tb polls.
At one of them a new comer or a Patlaaaw pre
sented himself, to exercise his eaffrag. He u
shrewdly suspected of net being "right" fcy
man who winked at a "challenger' wfca "t&a
then interposed :
"Are you naturalised
"Yes, I w-a-a-a."
"When ?"
"A spell ago an more.
"How long have you lived ia Las country P
"Anan."
"How long Lave yoa lived berat"
"Goiu on eight months."
His consecutive answers proved satisfactory to
the inspectors, and he was advancing to the polls
to deposit his vote, when a wag wrtb faoe sa
"clerical" as Holland's immitthU ummk
planted himself before him, and in an under toot,
but in a very significant manner, said
rat, I'm your friend look out! Har jo
ever been u-axinaled ?"
"I never waj."
"Then yoa can't vote! It' bigaay dUt
Prison!"
And tho incipient voter was Led tt q
1cm b.
Good. A yourg lass who went to erapaa4
in j and came back full of the revival which thy
bad, and who did nolhiug the fellovrieg week bt
sing.
"Shout! shout, we're gaining ground !
She had tho tunc so pat, that all she said wi
'ut a co'..ini:a.tioncf that song, andnot nnfre
quently the rhyme was too long for th tune.
Old JoH ler slippe d in and took a Lena off the ta
b'.e, and just as he was making fcr the door, lb
6ung out
"If you don't go out IU knock yon down,
IJalle, Kailclujar.
You nasty stinkin' flop ear'd bcaad, "
O, Glory, Kailclujar!
Our Tommy believes this te be dog-rrdL
TaiLOas. Two tailors, who were thieving sad
trying to undersell each other, one day met al
thus aacoctcdona the other, who had bUU
upper hand :
"I tteals the stuff to save my pelf.
And then I makes then op myself.
i cannot think though oft I try,
flow you can cheaper sell than I,
"111 tell you friend," the other Eli,
'I steals my cloths ready made."
A Kentucky paper says it is eettin to be rerw
fashionable in that Quarter ta cnrloo
with marriage notices, when sending them to tkt
printer. A good custom that ought to pmail
everywhere.
Six dollars to printer and priest.
No sensible man could refuse :
Five dollars to render him blest.
And one to publish the news !
A Yankee and Southerner were paying OokssV
on a steamboat.
"I hav'nt seen an ace for some time," remark
ed the Southerner.
"Wall I guess you haint," said tha YanxaeL
"but I can tell you where they are. On of 'am
is up your coat sleeve there, and the other thrt
are in tho top of my boots."
"John, how docs the thermometer stand
Ajiainst -he wall, dad!"
'I mean how is the mercury T"
' T puess it's pretty well, it hasn't complain!
lately."
"You little rascal, is it colder than yesterday!'
"I really don't know, dad, but IU go out and
feel !"
Some crusty old bachelor, having been jilted
by his bright particular star, in a fit of despr
ation, wrote the following horrid slander opoa
"female women" in general :
Tho girls are all a ficetir-g show.
For man's illusion given,
Their smiles of joy, their tears of '
Deceitful shine, deceitful flow,
There's not one true in seven.
"Ma. didn't the minister say last Sunday that
the sparks flew upward ?"
"Yes. my dear, how came you to be thinking
of it ?"
"Because, yesterday, I saw cousin Sally'i
spark stagger along the street and fall down
wards." 'litre, Bridget, put this child to bed, ike must ,
be getting sleepy.
"Ah, doctaw, dots the choleraw awfeet ths
hijrhaw awdaw ?" asked an exquisite of a cele
brated physician in New Orleans.
No," replied the M. D., "but it's daatk oa
fools, and yeu'd better leave the city immediate
ly."
The fellow sloped.
Meeting a negro on tho road, with a crape OH
his hat, a traveller saidt
"You have lost some of your friends, I M.
"Yes, Massa."
"Was it a near or distant relative t"
"Well, putty distant Tiout tweaty-fout mOa
I guess," was the reply.
"Mr. Schoolmaster, do you know algebra 1"
"No, but I know Lis father. Col. Eray, ai
o jrirl-Jtoo."
This is a cousin to the man who didn't knoi
: mathematics, but knew Jira Ma tic like book.
"Goodness mo !" cried a nice oldiady the other
ftl- ' day, "if the world goes to an end
what eba'.l I do ftr wwif f