11 "VE GO WILCir DESCZULTIC PSIKCIFLES POINT THE WAT VITSIf THET CZASB TO LEAD, "V72 CEASE TO FOLLOW." VOLME IS. EBENSBMO, THURSDAY, JANUARY 6, 1853. NUMBER 11. 5f T Kit 31 S. The "MOUXTAIX SEXTIXEL' is publish ti every Thursday morning, at One Dollar and Fifty Cent per annum, if paid in advance or within three months; After three months Two foliar -will be charged. No subscription will be taken for a shorter period than six months ; and no paper -will be discontinued until all arrearages are pail. A failure to notify a discontinuance at the expira tion of the term subscribed for, will be consid rl as "ew engagement. test, A D YERTISEMEXTS will be inserted : the following rates: 50 cents per square for the first insertion; 75 cents for two insertions; $1 for three insertions ; and -o cents per square Tor cvirv subsequent insertion. A liberal reduc tion made to those who advertise by the year. All advertisements handed in must have the jr"i'ir number of insertions marked thereon, orthev will be published until forbidden, and cL&rgcd in accordance with the above terms. All letters and communications to insure ttiUition must be poet paid. A. J. 1111EY A FrtgliteneU Chinaman. The Sun fraucisco Herald, in describing a Ite fire, describes the following amusing scene : Mr. Ifossefross finding it impossible, from the intense heat, to get his pipes to work in the rear, determined to smother the flames for a mo Dfi.t in that quarter, by blowing up a portion cf the building. The sansome truck was at hand with the necessary sapping and mining niter;a!s. Mr. Hossefross adjusted a charge of twenty-five pounds, applied the fuse, and was just on the point tf igniting it when a grief-torn CiiiiuiGiin, whose property was suffering, rush ed into the building to save all Le could. Mr. Hoefross tried every expedient to warn hiai of his d inner, but not speaking Chinese, was compelled to eject him forcibly. The poor fol low pulled his pigtail distractedly, and rushed into the house acrain and strain. Mr. H. finally pointed to the.match, the fuse, and the powder. ', &ai imitating the noise of an explosion, at list j nle the Chinamen understml what was going ; en. As soon as the ilea struck him, he cleared , , , , , . i the door at a bound, and sped up the street, h.s : Vril and breeches flying in the breeze, on the wires of fear. When latt seen, just previous to ? the explosion, he was bounding up the embank- f meet hi i:ie neai oi Sacramento street. .Mr. H.'s eipe'lient was successful, and taking ad vantage cf the momentary cessation cf the heat behind, ke planted his pipe, and the gallant fire men soon held their own, and gradually gained tontrol over the flames." Statistics or (lie Presidential Election. The New York Journal of Commerce says the big vote at the recent election is greater than t any previous one ; though the gain over 184S only 11,GS9 ; 71,2'.2 over 1814, aud 99,592 ever 1810. The Democratic vote is 365,216 greater th.-n in 1818 ; 240,598 greater than in 144, and 4jS,478 greater than in 1810. The abolition vote is 130,880 less than in 181S and S3 T.'.t. rrrn.itnr. 41..... ;.. 1QI 1 Vermont is the banner State on the Whig side, s is New York on the Democratic ; the latter tavine riven I'iorc'p a rliir:il:tv of 27.2ii0. and a ajority over both whig and abolition of 1830. Cut in proportion to the whole number of votes polled, Texas is the banner State on the demo cratic side, having given nearly three times as sany to Tierce as to Scott. Georgia comes -fit, having given Tierce mere than twice as cJiy as Scott ; then Arkansas and Florida. II rM; east plurality in any State is 25 in Dela te for Pierce. The States polling the high est aggregate vote, are New York, 522,480 ; fcnnsvlvania. SAG. 272 : Ohio. 53.303. The 3 'aie polling fewest votes is Florida 7,1G1. Etlaware pnmps nt 1 r.fi;V The largest abolition vote given by any State 1S -1,782 in Ohio. Next comes Massachusetts 28,023, and New Yrrk with 25,433. In fr"T ortion to the whole number of votes, Ver toLtis the greatest hot-bed of abolitionism. CUIogue on Smoking. "No, ir.y dear Mr. Smashpipes, I am sure you lfe ruining your health, smoking and smoking jcu doail the time. I never saw anything like in my life." "Bless me, my love, what's the tatter now ? You talk as if you never saw a c:gar before !" "No, I do not mean that, but I fully tlfiuk you do carry i t to excess." "Why, "Tenty-fivc or thirty 1" "That's all.V "My Kars anl ga iters ! And you don't call that poking to excess?" "No." "Well, Mr. "-aashj.ipcs, perhaps you'll tell me what you do nsijer smoking to excess ?" "Certainly, my ore." ii'm v,c: ii t - :uiug. en, x iuiuk u man. t3? be said to smoke too much when " "Well, aut !" "Why, when he smokes two cisars at cace. i 5,Soon after the late V lir. Hcaley, the artist, waited UDon Gen. S. solicited him to sit for his nortrait. U9 clary 0f expressions of his a aS 4fame ar.J t.f ymeBts, .uMye foT and lujto the xNortli Jirud Lim j,; eral Leftrd eaid: .Vaai- .-i.e had n,vr many "V' wl country; one womd have prompts. ziave or.. . . . Idl Jon..Sn04 - v.cu gut.- Via -verv ttS t , ue straighten "sir, Til -sMIv PVJ mind tw ' that L.-.aa TIIK DEATH Of.TIIE OLD YE All. BT GEO. D. PRESTIGE. List ! list ! what foarful tone waa that which rose Upon the wind of midnight ? Nature sounds No knell o'er earth for the departed year,' Yet wheu its iast breath passed into the void Of the by-gone eternity, I heard Echoed within the chambers of my soul A sound, perchance the shadow of a sound, Wild, strange and disai il, as it were a wail, A low and blended wail, from all the graves And sepulchres of ocean and of earth Upon the stilly air. Oh was it not The solemn voice of old Eternity " Uttering one cry, one wild and deep lament, For Lis dead child ! The year, alas ! is gone Forever from the world ! He seemed too strong, Too mighty e'er to die. Jle laid his hand On breathing millious, and they sank beneath The green grass of the grave , he blew aloud The trumpet-blast of battle, and dark hosts Met in the mortal shock, and when the llama And smoke of conflict had gone by, they lay Like autumn's red leaves on the plain ; he pas sed O' cr earth, and, at each, wave of his broad wings, Volcano, earthquake, whirlwind, storm, and flood Sprang up beneath the silcat spell and wrought The fearful errands of their destiny ; Yet now Lis own great mission done, he lies On scorched and broken pinions with the dead, There, there to eleep. What is Time ? A giaiit power, stern, vatt, and bodiless. That we may feel but never see. We gaze With achinc eves into the past, and there t We see a thousand shapes of light and gloom Floating like atonin in the pallid beams Of mournful memory, but the perished yea ' Is all unseen. From thence we Badly turn, And. gating on the future, we behold Unf.;thonied OCC)tn to tl;e lomlj s'hore Of earthly being, but the coming years Are all invisible. And then we pause gHze above' "f1' V1 arJ 1o,! Our ves tire startled bv the mighty deeds of thJ ow pasK;njC t'e . the irou e5ht Of his stem presence rts upon our souls ; We feel the awful spwtre touch our brows ""K1 eoM ietb-rike finger; "and we hear ltie aeep an.l in uled ror that rise ! ana u:u4ea ror that rises up From ali his ia:ghty doings on our earth ; And j'ft he La no form to cast its ?;leara Or ehadow on our Bigb. The parted ye..r Called forth from earth a blooming Taradise Of sweet spring-tiowcrs he wtved hia Ritumn wand And they were not. lie woke in human pouls Myriads of hopes and jiys and burning loves, -Tlint sct-nied like things of immortality He touched them aud they died. Another year, i The tft of God, is cast bi-tieath the skies,' ! And what is dukly hidden in the still i Aud i!ent depths of its uiysterious months, - ! We may not know tha.uk God, we may not know, We only know that with each passing month And lay and hour, the low, deep wail of grief, The iaa 1 lene 1 ery of agoiiy, the shout Of fierco ambition, th- loul thunder shock Of bloody cmSict, m.I the knell of death Will echo, ench, in one brief moment o'er The sea of time, and then be swallowed up And lost forever in the onward sweep Of its unpitying waves. The midnight skies Are weeping silent tears as if they grieved , For the old y. ar, and the pale stars look sad And trem!e, as if living, sorrowing hearts Were throbbing in their breasts. In vain! in vain ! The faded year is nothing now. The flowers, The bird.-, the waves, the thousand melodies Of vernal life aod nature will come back, Dut ha roturti3 no more. The winds may search For him iu their far journcyings ; the grand Old ocean with its thunder tones may call Forever to him in its ceaseless dash Deneath the heavens; the bright and burning stars With their, high tones of Eden minstrelsy May speak his name ia their eternal sweep Along their flaming paths ; the comets wild May seek him by the baleful blai e they spread Through realms of aucient night ; but none of these Shall ever find him, for he liveth not In all the universe of God. Years die, And centuries die, and there will come a day When the dread angel of the Apocalypse, Standing on land aud sea, will lift his hand Aud swear that time shall be no more. Yet thou, Oh man, wilt never die. The earth will pass Like a wild dream away, the very heavens lie rolled together as a scroll, but lie. Beneath whose feet the sun and stars are dust, Hath said that thou shall never die. Those great And awful words of the Omnipotent Are caught up and re-echoed to thy soul By all the world of nature. A deep voice, . That tells thee of thy immortality, Speaks in the breeze and in the hurricane ; Blends with the gentle music of the stream, The loud rush of th.iAract, the peal From the darUfJosota oi tlfe clouu, ana au The i''tftCT mvstic auetcs of night, l&tkA $th the e easting roar -TDeep iQirpic unrfet and swells TTbVthe Btcr3 arouuVt, idnight throne. Sun-by ti e 85,i York TandV, Raiir0ad, as all - thr0UgU .lin& wUJ d runs iu .i.;WBeUed country; n- -i tixat tbfe cars -wcrey to lose their Q ' i -nder about tbrouV wilderness. I hae " r however, m" r of cars star- vray, ...-r. that a,0 Rtfir. i it i -o v.tj last ' ,le t from New York, . peor" tfrom r Dunkirk, From the Harrisburg Keystone. Commerce and Finance. THE CURRENCY AND THE TARIFF. When the immortal Adam Sm rriuia ScotlandL and the illustrious Say, in France, first laid open to view the sources and means cf national wealth and prosperity, they did not expect the truths they unfolded to find acceptance in the Old World for many long years. They knew that it was wedded to its idols ; and they saw that it had cherished its commercial errors, and practised its financial abuses so long, that they had at last become necessary to the vcTy exis tence of the social state, and could not be eradi cated without a total revolution in the very frame-work of society. But they turned to the Model Republic uf the West, then being peopled by strong-minded men, busily engaged in upbuilding a new social and commercial system, trying ail things, and hold ing fast those which were good, as the land of hope and promise. There they hoped to see their great ideas realized, and to behold the Young World teaching the Old the direct road to na tional wealth, comfort and well-being. Little did they dream that here, separated by a vast and fctorray ocean from the errors of our Fath erlands, 'a great party would rise up, whose ob ject it would bo to infuse into our political sys tem those out-worn and exploded errors respec ting the currency and the taritF, which have made Spain poor, with Mexico and Peru at her back, and which have sadly impeded the pro gress cf Borne of the proudest nations of Eu rope. And yet it is even so. The whig party claims I past, it lives m a p t. It lives in a past age, and ever upholds , institutions which have lagged f r behind the wants of the present tin e. Hence its adv cacy of a high protective tariff and an inflated cur rency. The chief argument of the whig party, and the one which it addresses to the great masses of consumers ia favor of protection, is that a high tariff proves quite as effectual rs free trade in the redaction of prices : that home competi tion will eventually bring down prices to their lowest possible rate. Now, if the cost of our labor and capital is such that we can produce as low at hjme as can be done abroad, what no d is there of protection? But if we can. import an article cluapcr than we can province it at home, why not do S3, and invest our land, labor and capital in that which will vield us a better i return ? Vii can raise pine upplcs ia hot-hou- ses, in grefit perfection, at double the cost of those imnorted. But h who raises his own i pine-applfs, instead of importing tuem, really I pays for each one the price of two ; for his la bor otherwise directed in agriculture, would furnish him with the means of buying two. But, rejoin our whig friends, we want a pro- tective tariff to build up our infant manufic- tures, which will thus in a few years become self-sustaining. To which it mny well be an swered, you have abundant protection for this purpose already in our revenue tariff. As the individual States levy a direct tax to sustain the State governments, so the United States, to sup port the federal government levies an indirect tax upon all consumers of imported goods, in the shape of a tariff which tax is paid by tbc importer to the custom-house, by the wholesale jobber to the importer, by the retailer to the jobber, and in the end by the consumer to the retailer ; the tax in eacli sale being included in the price of the article. This revenue tax or tariff, mainly levied on the import of goods now manufactured in this country, amounts to over $50,000,000 annually. Is not this sufficient protection ? A manufacture which could not plant itself under such aasplces, would be a curse to any country. The true policy, alike dictated by nature, and confirmed by the teachings of political econemy, is for each country to produce those articles for which it is most specially adapted by producing which, its land, capital and labor will receive the fullest possible return. And in such a com petition we would have nothing to fear. We have vast mountains of iron ore, the purest in the world. We have t c finest and most im mense water power known ; while our soil yields, in close proximity, the products necessary for the loom. We have great prairies, on which tne sun sets as on the sea, whose virgin soil will re pay tho husbandmen a thousand-fold for centu ries to come. We have a great valley, in itself a world, veined by ten thousand streams, af fording nnbouuded facilities to our internal trade. We people a continent so little disjoined by nature, that you could construct a railroad without n inclined plane, from Philadelphia to San Francisco ; a continent situated in the very commercial centre of the world, and which is destined to become the great highway of nations over which shall pass to our ancestral Europe th teas and epices of the "barbaric East." All to be the conservative party cf this country ' tective tariff, with its accompanying imaginary and to make good its boast, it has ever prided advantages pf checking importations, keeping itself in keeping as far behind the age as pos- j specie ia the country, and turning the balance sible. It resists every great measure designed j of trade in eur faver, is right and expedient, we for the general good. Distrusting whatever is ( claim that its policy with regard to the curren new, however trua and useful, it cvir reverses I cy contitdicts its tariff policy ; that its financial and sustains whatevei is old, however false and policy Umds to increase importations, hurry feeble. It is prc-emineutly the party of the i specie ot of the .country, and turn the balance we need in order to fully realize these Tich bles sings, is a government which shall leave free scope' for individual enterprise, and which shall rot,- by . means of tariffs, endeavor lo. hviWji sickly, manufacturing system up on the ruins of a healthy and vigorous com merce. . But we must bear in mind that the whig par ty, ownel and controlled chiefly by capitalists and cottln lords, really wantsa high tariff, not for the siuie of low, but of high prices, whereby the profits of the manufacturer may be augmen ted by lils monopoly of the home market. Y'et even here it 13 mistaken. 'Under certain cir cumstances a high tariff may temporarily raise prices exorbitantly. But there is a great natu ral law--the law of supply and demand which proves an effectual limitation. So soon as the supply f an article much exceeds the demand, the mar: et will be glutted and its price will fall. This wiV discourage the production of that ar ticle, wh?rt by in time the demand will exceed the suppV,-, and its price will rise. Such is the case with Dour and wheat, whoso price is on a perpetual see-saw. Such is the case with the wiudow-jlass makers along the Monongahela river, of whom we have been told that during every ten years one-half of them break up, while the other half made their fortunes. And such is the cajo with the iron interest, which having been for a long time too much depressed, is just now unduly exalted. It ha3 been depressed chiefly because two tons of metal were made where one was needed; and it is now exalted because the demand has great outgrown iho lim- i lteu supply. I But even Allowing the whig party that a pro- of tra.ZeJaot effectually agamsi m. The financial policy of the democratic party is well known. Knowing the currency to be a good sertant, but a dangerous master, it endea vors to keep it under strict control. ; It views with, jealosy the too great multiplication of banks, tlose niirMnea for artificially, making mencycieap by issuing-their bills, and then making ii dear by withdrawing their notes from circulatioi; thus bafSing' the acutest foresight, and often causing the severest commercial dis tress. I. has hence ever advocated the policy of bavina a fpecie currency to circulate from band to lund in the community, so that labor may be sire of receiving its just due reserving bauk bills of high denominations only for large conimercul transactions, and to circulate among I. .' i ... i : those wliosre aoie to ocar me .oss tably atterds the use of paper money. It holds as a truth attested by ail fact and all history, that mone; is as much of a commodity as soap ' tea, derving its cheif value from its being the chief hstrrment of exchange and transfer, without wlich no extwded commerce were pos sible ; and that it3 value is determined, like that of every obcr commodity, by the law of supply ! an i lnanl : 60 that trben q,5tIty is les' ! eened mcT becomes dearer, of it is given for any artcle, or in otner woras, pneca jati. To the revirse, wheu the amount of the curren cy is increised bcyon-l the demands of an in creased commerce, money becomes cheaper, and more of it fe given for any article ; or, what is the same ding, prices rise. Thus, a bushel of wheat is wirth now four times a much epecie as it was ftar )undred years ago not because the intrinsic viue of wheat is greater now, but because the vrit influx of silver and gold from Mexico and T-'ru has caused them to fall to one fourth of ther former value. Acting upon this truth, it has ever been the democratic policy to confine the ourreucy to specie, with bo much pa per money as will suffice to supply tic wants of extending c jnmerce. The whig financial policy is just the reverse. Mistaking tie quantity of a currency for its val ve, it strive to multiply banks and paper money as much aspossible. It endeavors to make bank notes of lw denominations almost the sole cir culating riedium. Discarding specie as the sole basis of tanking, it advocates the use of State stocks fxd even of real estate, both of very un certain alue, at banking capital. To make it popular it calls thi3 system free banking. Free swindling, would be a much more" appropriate name, as we fchall presently see. Follow it out to its full extent, and you have a paper curren cy doubling or trebling in value all the real es tate and State stocks in the Union. Now what is the result of such a policy as this ! Money will inevitably becomo plenty and cheap. Trices of goods will rise, not because their intrinsic value is become greater, but be cause money is so much cheaper. Vast fortunes will spring up in a night, like mushrooms, through tho universal rise in prices. Specula tion will be aroused. Tho most absurd schemes will be blindly rushed into by pien who hope la zily to win fortunes in a day, instead of building them up by frugality and perseverance in a life time. Under the influence of the general ex citement, prices rise until it becomes immensely profitable, in rpile of a high tariff, to import goods from those countries Where a specie-basis cur rency has kept them at a fair price. Importa tions are immense. All goes well until the day of payment arrives, when it is found that our paper money will not pass current beyond-the Atlantic. Our specie, rendered 6iirperfluous by the superabundance of paper money goes abroad to pay our debts. Then confidence is shaken. A general run is made upon the banks, whose coffers, arc found not to have a dollar in them wherewith to redeem their paper, while their books show thousands of dollars, lent to speculators, lost forever. The bub ble bursts, and universal distress and ruin en sue. The capitalist of yesterday suddenly finds himself reduced to the level of the laborer of to-day. The widow and the orphan are sudden ly burled from competence into destitution. Thi3 is no fancy sketch. It is every word true. It is but a history of the great financial convulsion of 1837. That great calamity was a legitimate result of whig policy and whig legis lation. We have now performed our promise of show ing how completely whig policy on the currency, stultifies whig policy on the tariff. Our task is done. We have not now time to notice farther the multitude of errors our whig friends teach in relation to these kindred topics. Their name is legion. Those we have noticed are probably the most important. On them tho truth or false hood of the reet depends. The voice of tho people ha3 lately rolled in thunder tones from the granito hills of New Hampshire, to tho mag nolia groves of Alabama, in condemnation of them. Never again can the whig party triumph, so long as its commercial and financial policy remains unchanged. It must cast down its old idols, marshal under new banners, clothe itself in new armor, and enlist under new leaders, be fore it can ever go forth again to battle and to victory. a pennstlvasiax. Benjamin Fraukllu's Letter to a Young WOXUM.U. The Boston Tost gives five copies of unpub lished letters from Dr. Franklin, which have re cently been found in that city. The following one seems to hav been addressed to a lady with whom he was on intimate terms previous to his marriage, and who was still single at that time : "rhiladelpkia, Oct. 1C, 1755. "Dear Katt, Your favor of tho 18th Juno came to hand, but on the 23d September, just three months after it wa written. I had two weeks before written you a long chat, and sent It to the care of your brother Ward. I hear you are now in Boston, gay and lovely as usual. Let me give you somo fatherly advice. Kill no more pidgeons than you can eat; be a good girl, and don't forget your catechibm ; go constantly to meeting or to church till you get a good hus band ; and then stay at home and nurse the children, and live like a Christian. Spend your spare hour in sober whibt, prayers, or learning to cipher. . You must practise addition to your husband's estate by industry and fruglity subtraction of all unnecessary expenses. Multiplication he will soon make you master of. As to dvnsion, I gay with brother Paul, 'Let there be no division tmong ye,' but as your good siBter Hubbard (my love to her) i well acquainted with the rule of two, I hope you will become as expert in the rule of three, that when I have again the pleasure of peeing you, 1 may find you, like my TUe vine surrounded with clusters, plump, jui cv. bWuiiig, pretty little rogues, just like their mamma. Auieu, tne oeu rsuea, u iuu 6w among the grave ones, and Uik politics. B. F." If r.nything comes nearer to the imploration of Ruth to Naomi, than the subjoined, we have not 6een it: 'Lord, bless and preserve that dear person whom Thou haet chosen to be my huBband ; let his life be long and blessed, comfortable and holy ; and let me also bcoroe a great blessing and a comfort unto Lim, a bharer in alibis joys, a refreshment in all Lii aorrows, a meet helper for him in all the accidents and changes in all the world ; mako me amiable for ever in his eyes, and for ever dear to hhn. Unite hia heart unto me in the dearest love and holiness, and mine to him in all sweetness, charity and compliance. Keep me from all ungentleuess, all discontented nces, and unreasonableness of passion and hu mor; and make me humble aud obedient, useful and observant, that we may delight in each oth er according to Thy blessed word, and both of us may rejoice in Thee, haiug our portion in the love and Bcrvico of God for ever." A Model Speech. The following is an extract from a speech cf Gen. Buncomb in favor of 64 40 North and 155 40 South: "Mr. Speaker When I open my eyes and look over this vast expanse of country ; when I see how, the years of freedom has caused it to rise ia the scale of civilization, and expand on either side ; wheu 1 see it growing, swelling, roaring like a spring freshet ; I cannot resist the idea, sir, that the day will come when this great na tion, like a young school boy, will burst its straps, and become entirely too big for its boots. Sir, we want elbow room, the continent, the en tire continent, and nothing but the continent, nl we will have it. Then shall Uncle Sam. placing his hat upon the Canadas, rest his right arm upon the Oregon coast, hU left upon the eastern seaboard w hittle away the British power while reposing his leg iike a freeman upon Cape Horn. Sir, the day will come, the day must come. MnrkedDoun. ''Mornin', squire," quoth a Cape- CoJ ish looking genius, as Le nulled into a largo flash dry goods store on Washington street, one morning this week j " got a pooty good lot of things in here." " Yes sir," sajs a frizzle-headed clerk, one of those whose complexion exhibit strong symptoms of " boarding house di et," a dearth of fresh air and exercise; and a ghostly profusion of starched linen, soap and hair grease; " what shall I sell you to day, sir?" " "Well, fir, I was tellin' on the old wo man afore I left hum, ef I could trade to please myself, I'd buy Ler some stuff for a gown, and myself a pair of trowsers." "Well, sir, if we can't sell to you, I'll stake the reputation of our house that you can't be suhed in this city !" says frizael head. "I want to know! Then just let us se some of yeur stuffs." In course of half an hour's pulling dowa and overhauling, frizzle head had "the goods" cut and rolled up, and they wcra under the arms of a specimen of the human family, about as storically disposed and physically constructed as the man who waa supposed to but the bull off the battery. " Can'fc I sell you something else to-day sir V says frizzle. Guess not," says Cape Cod, "I'll corn arin when 1 want afresh mess of stuff. My name'd Jenkins, Jo&iah Jenkins; jiat mark down these things, and may be afora Christmas 1 II Le in and see about em. " Sir ?" inquiringly responds frizila head. "Jenkins mark 'em down." " I dou't comprehend you, sir." " Don't ? Come round here," says Cape Cod, leading frizzle out to the door, where, placing his bony, big forefinger upon a large placard, says he, " what's that ? Do you calkelate Cape folks can't read nor not bin'? Goods marked down! Mark thepe down I've got; when I come in agin, we'll see about em." Whether the clerk was trying to se through the fog of the fact, or whether ha was stunned by the "marked intelligence" of a Cape Coder, we know not; but when the clerk looked around the customer wai liuUdoicn. A Yankee lad, who had concluded to take a few lessons in the art of dancing, so that he might astonish the 'gals' when he returned home, applied to one of the cele brated French dancing masters of the city. " How much duyew ax a lesson ?" ask ed he of the teacher. "Ze first will be only four dollar, ze sec ond two dollar, and ze Crd One dollar," tu the answer. " Just so," Paid he ; " well, I guess I'll commence with the third, as I can't stay intown long." A Frenchman Ileulixisr uis WJf. A man named Couscoussou, was lately tridby the Tribunal of Correctional Police, for having beaten Madame Couscoussou, his wife; " It appears that you thrashed her with great brutality what haTe you got to say for yourself?" ashed tho President. "Pray, Tdr. Fresideut, if your wife wouldn't let you carry aa umbrella, what would you do ! "Oh, the monster I oh, the brigand! chimed in madarue Coucoussou. . ' What he says there is not true, Mr. President. He waa drunk whea he beal me." "Who doesn't get drunk now and then?" asked M. Coucousisou. " But you get drunk always' answered the wife. " And, Mr. President, when he's drunk he insi&ts on going to bed with his boot on, and with his umbrella that is hi character." " I wear my boots in bed to keep my feet warm," observed the accused. " I don't so much object," said the wife, "to the boota, though they arc dirty and tear the sheets, but I do object to the um brella. Think of a wet umbrella in bed, Mr. President." " It is in the wetness of the umbrella related the husband, " that I find my ex cuse. A prudent man is never without his umbrella when it rains; and as it was rain ing when I went to bed, I took it with me." "Oh, you drunkard!" shrieked Madams Coucoussou. " But I appeal to all women present," she continued, turning round to the auditory, "if it be pleasant to bo in bed with a damp umbrella?" " It was raining, I tell you, and I was afraid that I might have dreamt that I was getting wet and as I have a great antipa thy to water I took my umbrella with m a3 a precaution." " Yes, and you beat m when I wanted to remove it from bed." T Tho ' Tribunal cut this diseussicfcHhort by condemning M. Coucoussoto tw'd day i c p r i ? an xe e n t . 7 Frm e Iapr . !!'-!' i i I 4 J4 1 ) 1 t k ! i ! i-c V:;' CtLtarl " v mom. ' nTT c -
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers