ctq.
"----- SUMMER.
The . gay, glad time of roses,
Tho summer days have come,
When with the daylight closes
Tho honey maker's hum;
Tho time when amber sunsets
Light the Heavenly fields,
And when the mirple clover
Its richest fragrance yields.
When the leafy trop hands
Weave a verdant roof,
With golden threads of sunshine'
Running through the woof;
When twilight sinks In dirkne•s,
And lilts the lire-fly light;
When roses scent the zephyrs
That murmur through the night;
When unlight.hours are Jewels
Strung on threads of time,
When weeks are stanau'd poems ;
Versed lu sweetest rhyme;
When the nights are magical
In the time of June,
And fairy lest are dancing
To harpeleords In tuna. •
Roll slowly, Earth, thit Summer
May Ulmer with us long,—
We'll revel in her bounty
And bless her in our song.
Ye-winds, 0 join our chorus
Of gratitude and praise
To Mtn whOse mercy glveth
The soft sweet summer days I
A Mother 'Waiting for the News
I=
How wearily the hours pass
Since, through the ambient air, -
The, lightning flashed the startling fret,
A battle has been thsre—
There, e.hore my nobis, honest boy
The path of fame pursues;
But, oh! my aching heart will burst,
While waiting for the news.
Wounded upon that gory field,
Not,alten he may die;
Nor mother there to wet his lips,
Nor raise his hopes on h'gh ;
Disfigured, stained. his leatures tnarred
By in..ny a sear and broke;
Alt! who can tell What mothers fool
While waiting for the news.
HALT
lIY L. .1. DUNLAP. ")
" Well, I do not see how she could
have done it !"
" Done what, )1 illy ?"
" Why, married a wan with a corli-
11111 i
Aunt Mary looked very serious.
" God forgive me !” I exclaimed. "
suppose I am very - wicked, but I never
could have' done it. Deformed people
are positively disgusting to me."
As I rose from . my seat, at these words,
anxious to make my escape from Aunt
Mary's reproof; my glance fell upoh the
laughing face of my cousin, Howard
Grant, who seated in an alcove at the
farther end of the room, had, unknown
to me, overheard what I had said:
He was rather vain—a circumstance
which his unusually handsome exterior
almost excused ; and if he had
r;ess, it was Ihr - his siotputy leg My
glance followed his, as he now looked
down on it. "No cork about those."
How I laughed, as 1 made him a mock
obeisance, and danced out ul the room to
attend grandpapa, whose step I heard in
tho ball.
I was just sixteen, the spoiled darling
of the loving ft lends, who had taken me 2 _ .
a wailing infant, Trout my dead mother's
breast- c at-id- had stood to me since in -the
relation of those parents, whose affection
1 had m ver known.
Four years afterward I had learned to
love Howard Grant„ and for one year
had been his promised wife. This was
sin the spring of 1861.
The night after Fort Sumter fell, I
heard the door open behind nie, and
quick steps cowing to my side; then an
arm was thrown around my waist, and
my face lifted so that the eyes which
bent. above me might look into the tear
filled eyes which could scarce bear their
scrutiny.
"'fears ? Mi/ly !" cried the dear voice,
mockingly. " A soldier's bride should
buckle her true-love's sword about him,
and, with smiles, send hint forth to vic
tory."
"Oh, Howard !" I cried as he drew
me up and folded me to his heart.
" Yes, darling," he said, answering
the mute questioning of my eyes, I have
volunteered. I desired to go into the
ranks, but when 1 offered to arm and
uniform the first company which should
be termed I was by acclaim chosen cap
tain of :hat company. So, if you please,
madam, behold Captain Grant."
,My tears, my weak tears overflowed.
He looked so brave, so noblb ! and ho
soon might be—,
" Therc,olearest!" he cried, "no more
tears to-night! Come to the piano and
sing La Marsellaise,' to arouse your
patriotism, and then we will go to moth
er. And, Milly," seriously, " beware,
love, how you say one word that would
make me weak in the hour of danger,—
Mrs. Grant," he continued, as his moth
er entered the room, " allow me to pre
sent to your favorable notice Capt. (Punt.
Make your salute, madam, to you; supe
rior officer." .
"My son, my son !" The mother's
arms were around his neck, her warm
rears falling upon his shoulder. I leaned
upon the piano and sobbed aloud.
Mother! Milly !" he cried. " Why,
what a mother and sweetheart yo are, to
drown my dawning glory inf your tears)
There Milly,
,you may leave' the piano,
we won't have any music to-night.
love,l didn't ask you for 'The Shower
of Parls.' Good-night to both of you.
I will go to my grandfather and ask him
if the heroes of I.Bl2,were sent forth "to,
ihattle"With the Sobs — of wiiinett
lute, ho, left the room.
Aunt Mary and leould but throw our
selves 'ltai each other'i arms and weep
out Our grief together. Yet :'‘ire• said,
bravely that these should be the last tears
we would shed, and that no word - of ours
shotild'cause our beloved to tither ift the
path - of duty. --
I will pot, dwell. upon the, two weeks
which followed--Ausy,,..stirring days to.
the volunteers, full' to repletion with . the
.preparations, for their approaching depar
ture—days- of ugonyand dread to those
who could:only sit idly at 'home and look •
forw4rd to the hour of prting,
VOL. 63.
A. K. RHEEM, Editor & Proprietor
Howard was desirous that our wedding
might take place immediately; but it
had been a desire of my father, expressly
named in his will, that I should not mar
ry until I had attained my twenty first
birthday. His only sister had married,
most" unfortunately, at the age of sixteen
years, aiid, although I was but a few
i t
months old „a— he time of his death, he
had desire st around my future all
the pl'otedl t. re which his loving fore
sight couldlap,i9se.
Well, aHAhings earthly have their
ending, aditSo soon too all the days of
grace whicil'had been granted us were
told; and one bright morning, with ban-
ners flying, music sounding, and bayo
nets glancing in the sunlight., " Company
A of the First Regiment of Volun
teers," with their captain at their head,
passed before the windows of that cap
tain's home, made a salute to the three
sad faces which gazed through the library
window, and, pursuing their way to the
railroad depot, departed for the scat of
war.
Oh ! the long weary monts which fol
lowed ! The agony of the first d rea d,
which, alter a time, settled down into a
dull pain that no Change of scene or
thought could for a moment remove !
The wearying for the sight of the dear
face, the sound of the dear voice—the
longing for intelligence, yet dread of re
ceivin, it lest it be adverse—the_
painful loran() ings of ill---;the quick
throbbing of the heart at the sound of
the hand which unfolded the morning's
paper—and the eager searching after the
waT news !
Nine lagging monthshad drap7ed their
;low length along, and, though often in
peril by flood and field, our captain had
thus fat...escaped uninjured, when, one
warning, as I sat at work, there was
handed to we the laconic message : " In
a skirmish with rebel cavalry,-Capt. Dow
ard Grant, dangerously wounded."—
" Dangerously wounded !" I sat as one
stunned, and when aunt Mary came to
seek we, some time afterward, 1 could
only murmur " Dangerously wounded!"
It was the burtheivor all my ravings,
they said, in the fever, which, fur nine
days, racked my frame almost to disso
lution, then, left me weak and helpless
as an infant. Strange to ray,, upon my
return to consciousness .1.-li)A,',Otirely
lost the memory of the intelN.o49 'Which,
superiidded to the wearineinf?ciety of
months, had been the vrinSTe:;,4 . liay sud
den illness. To all mii . . t in f tlkilles don.
corning Howard, his nitiolo ; , - ,iniprovised
favorable replies, and; JO - o,ik,'''desire for
his letters, answered tin 4 Oete3 Were sonic
for me, which I slionlAu:Ve.-as soon as I
was strong enough o. l 'l44Autu.
As I grew strondeOlitiiitiiet and dim
ness of my sick rootni!gtiWZ.,uncridurable,
nef r on-e-morningi- 7 4,a,g,u9-itti:ft—of
entertaining nuselrfn6Cfew moments; 1
Titleddfrom the stand be'§i'de my bed the
Bible, from which my grandfather had
been reading to me, a•id 'tell to tracing
with my linger the designs upon the
binding. As I somewhat carelessly
handled it, there flu( te.ted from between
the leaves a folded paper upon which 1
recognized the hand-writing of our tinni
ly physician. I had been tea that he
was absent upon thy expressing surprise
at receiving the visits of a stranger;
and, not doutting that the paper in
tny hand contained written advice as
to my treatment, I thought. to exer
cise my eyes upon this, that, so learning
their strength, I might - die sooner claim
the promised reading of the precious lt
ters for which I had been wearying. In
the act of spreading it open upon the bed,
that I might read With greater case, the.;::
words cuught my eye :
" You will-be shocked to learn that
his foot had been so badly, shattered by a
ball that it was thou2,lft necessary to am
putate it immediately." •
When my aunt came to my room,
sonic time afterward, she found ine ly
ing prone upon the floor by the bedside.
" Why, what is this?" she exclaimed.
" I gut up and tried - to . dress myself,"
I answered, faintly. " I must go to
him.,,
" Go to him ?" she echoed iq,surprise
Then, as she raised we in her strong
arms, and laid me upon the bud, her eye
fell upon the paper and Bible, which still
lay upon the covers, and she said :
" Fattier. has used an unfortunate
marker this time."
When she had me once mpre safely co
vered up in bed, and wet, camphorated
cloths laid 'Upon my burning forehead,
she deemed it prudent to tell me the
whole truth. She had found me, upon
the morning of the receipt of the des
patch, lying back in my chair; with the
paper ciaved between my hands. Read
ing upon the envelope, which lay at my
feet, her own name, she had taken the
paper . from my unresisting hand, and
read the distresAg intelligence. liar
first action was to - Wave me conveyed to
my own room, and put to bed ; then she
went' herself to the telegraph office, where
she remained until, by dint orineessatit
telegraphing, she at length discovered to
what hospital her son'had been removed,
and that - she bo permitted to
With-tittle difficulty she had induced
Pr.. Williams_ to. go in her stead. The
letter which I had partly. read was the
first one received from •hun after his Ar
rival 'at.tho Wapiti& The Operation of
amputation ercoutse, been:: Per
formed before his arrival, . but he had
found' his-patient " doing welt." Sioco
then other letters had been reccived - from
him, all giving r faVorablolaccounts;.but
—and the mother's voice sunk despond..
at least "two months
:Ware he could bout the journey hoMe
"zit must' speak briefly 'of those two
months. PoOtor jililliains returned home
0
so soon as his patient was entirely out of
danger. Then we waited.
My recovery was very slow, harassed
as I was by constant fears fur Howard.
Then, too, his letters—written by a
friend—were all to his mother, and my
heart ached for a sight of the dear, fa
miliar handwriting, and the loving words
with which his letters to myself had
been so full. There were messages to
me, to be sure kind and cousinly, but no
more ; yet I said to myself, "He is
guarding his love from the profaning
eyes of his comrades."
Over two months had passed away,
and, one evening, I sat 'before the libra
ry fire, idly seeing (as on one evening
nearly a year ago) pictures in • the glow
ing and dying coals. 'This evening see
ing not battle-fields and marching troops,
but my soldier, stretched upon his nar
row cot, ill and lonely, when wheels,
which I had heard slowly rumbling up
the Street, stopped before our door.—
Quick feet, came down the stairs—the
outer door opened—there was a sound of
low. • talking in the hall—then the library
door was flung wide open—and a figure
entered upon crutches, oh ! how unlike
my Howard !---nalc—haggard—limping!
For a moment I was Joverwhchned
then 1 sprang forward, crying, " How
ird! Howard !"
Ho sunk wearily into a
,chair, then
held out his arms to rile sayiM* mourn
ft-MY :
" Give me one kiss, Milly, for the old
itues."
" The old times !" 1 echoed. "Oh
Toward, what has come between us ?"
" This !" he said pointing down to hi
footless limb.
In an instant the cause. of Howard's
silence to toe, since his wound was re
vealed to Inc; also the cause of the ap
pealing glances which toy aunt had cast.
-upon toe so frequently during the past
week.
" Oh, Howard !" I said, reproachfully,
flinging my arms around his neck, and
drawing the dear head to my bosom.
" illy," he said, "do not let a inn
mentary impulse blind you as to my fu
ture. Rernembe - r : Creme, for !"
Reverently I kissed the pale forehead
I could nut spew for the tours which
choked my voice.
"I know, darling,'' he continued,
" how your fresh vigorous life has always
shrunk from intimate association with
the deformed Ido not, blame . you , I
felt the same onoe. Now, it has been
hard to school myself, (haling; but 1 can
give you up."
" Howard ! darling !" I said, bending
the dear head back, su that, 1 might Idol:
into her eyes. "The Lord do so to me.
and more also, if aught' but death part
thee and me. God i , rant rue the great
--lioner----of---beiri-g7the—wifp-urf—on-e—whcr—ltits
suffered for his country!"
"Is this so?' Tia asked. "Is she still
mine? It has been so hard to hear,
ly ? I have longed for death rather than
a life unblessed by your love. I feared
to lose you !" clasping roe closely. " You
know what you once aaid "
(Surely, reader, we arc judged for
every famish word )
One month afterward we were mar
ried. My hushand wears a cork
and lam proud of it. It is his badge id'
tionoi. Had he lost an arm too, in the
service of his country, for illy owns.tke.
I should nor have cared. And as to
glasses"—God grant that we way both
live to wear theta !
An Indian inaking a speech on edu
cation, not. long since at, a mixed meet
ing of llindoos and En;dish,hen, main.
rained, in spite of a protest on the part
of his European audience, that there are
three castes in England—the aristocra
cy, the /Eau-p.m . :v. and the There
is, no doubt, if the pretensions of the
two higher classes aro admitted, much
Inure truth in this Ilindoo view of the
case than many of us are willing to con
fess. There is, however, a fourth caste
in European society—that of the royal
families. The forty crowned heads who
are united to each other by blood rela
tionship maintain a theoretrical equality
among themselves. They ibrui a com
munity apart with interests of their own,
independent altogether of those of the
States represented by each' sovereign.—
The royal families have been allowed 'to
repudiate. as illegitimate, marriages not
contracted within the fancily circle, be
they ever so lawtul, according to tbe law
of the land, and to brand them as mor
ganatic. The. King of Denmark marries
a clever and attractive milliner, and the_
Union'is celebrated with all the rights of
the church bat he remains a batchelor
in the eyes of the diplomatists. If the
Prince of Wales had been permitted to,
marry the daughter of an English duke
his offspring would have been repudiated..
" Gentlemen of the jury," said a West
eyn lawyer, "would -you set a rat-trap to
catch a' bear,,or make fools of your Selves
by trying to spear a buffalo with a knit
ting needle kuow you would not.-
- 'rhon how came you'be guilty Ol --convict
ing client -- ohwarcsliiii - ghtd - rfoTteking
the life.of woman." The prisoner was .
acquitted. -
Buffon, it was once stated- in conver•
bation, had dissected a near relative.. • A .
ladfoxelatining - against the - unfeeling tia,
13 4 •Maaran obseived " Why, Madam,
she was dead l" This remark' reminds
us:of the. French Princess • who sat to
Cavera for her statue. A. lady, to whom
shp spoke of the fact, inquired:, 'h Digs
you not feel rather qncomfortabler
"Not at all," replied her highness ) •""for
of co t tirse• there was ,a good firetfie
room:",
Castes of Society
TI14(411r
CARLISLE, PA., FRIDAY, JUNE 26, 1863.
A Thrilling Incident of the War,
Nine or ten yeai:s ap a citizen of • one
of the towns in the .eastern 'part of Mas
sachusetts, was unjustly suspected of a
crime which the statute could not easily
reach, but deservedly brings upon him
guilty of it, the indignation of upright
men. There were circumstances which
gave color to the suspicion, and the un
fortunate gentleman suffered the misery
of lose of friends, business and reputation.
His sensitive nature could not face these
trials; and he fell into such a condition
of mind and body that alarmed his fami
ly At last, having invested his property
so that it could be easily managed by his
wife, he suddenly disappeared, leaving
her comfortable with the care of two
boys, of ten and twelve years. The first
fear. that he had sought violent death,
was partly dispelled by the orderly ar
rangement of his affairs, 'and after the
dispovery that a daguercotype of the
family group was missing from the par
lor table, not much effort was made to
trace the fugitive. When, afterwards,
facts were developed which established
his innocence of the crime charged, it
was found impossible to communicate with -
him ; and as the publication of the story
in the columns of several
,widely oireula
ted journals failed to r call him, he was
geoerally supposed to . he dead.
At the outbreak of the prevent civil
„waritis_eld 06 S.Oll Aply a,y9tiugAnal, was,
induced by a frienda Captalu in a
Western regiment, to enlist in his com
pany. Ile behaved well through.tle ca
paigais in Missouri an ."fenn.2ssee, and
after the capture or Fort Dopelson, was
awarded a First Lieutenant's commission.
At the battle of Mtrfreesboro, he was
wounded in the lerr iirm.se slightly that
he wi k s still able to take charge of a squad
of wounded prisoners.. While performing
this duty I.c became aware that one of
them; a - middle aged man, with a lull
heavy beard, was looking at him with fix
ed attention. The day after the fight,
as the ()dicer Was passing, the soldier gave
the military salute, and said ;
" A word with you, sir, if 'you please.
You remind me of an old friend. Are
you from New England?" •
"I am,"
" From Massachusetts?
"
" And your name
The young hieutenip4olit Lis name,
and why he Caine te--6004ii-a Western
regiment.
" I thought so," ii4;stAtic, other, and
turning away he
Although his curit . B4'y: : 44s much
i by trr - 0 4 -n,1i,.4.1.14 . 1f114tr,(4", the offie'er
firebore to questio&ilii4; l 4,tid-xithilrew.
Rut in the atternuoiOe'lOtili occasion 'm
renew the emu versatioii4i*tex pressed the
interent awakened ,
the incident
I knew your 'father,". said the p r is..
"Is he well ?"
DBE
" kVe have not seen him for years
We think he is dead."
Then tUllowin-- such an explanation ut
the circumstances of his disappearanct as
the young nian c•mld give. Ile had
never known the precise nature of the
charges against his rather, but was able
to make it qui(e., clear that his innocence
had been established.
I knew your mother, also," contin
ued the soldier. " I was in love with
her when she married your father."
" r have a letter from her dated ten
days ago. ',lly brother is a nine months'
man in New Orleans."
After a little desolutory conversation,
the soldier took from under his coat, a
leathern wallet, and disclosed a dagure
reotype ease. The hasp was gone, and
the corners were rounded by wear.
" Will you oblige me," he said, by
looking at this, alone, in your tent ?"
Agitated alur.st beyond control, the
young officer took the .case and hurried
away. He had seen the picture before !
ft represented a than and woman, sitting
side by side, with a boy at the knee of
each. The romantic story moved the
commander of the division to grant the
young man a furlough, and both father
and son reached home last week.— he
Wurchester Spy.
ADVANTAGES OP YEARS.- You arc
"getting into years!, Yes, bUt the years
are getting into you-L-the ripe, rich years,
the genial, mellow years, the lusty, lm•ciou,
years. One by one the crudities of your
youth are falling off from you„, the yanityr
egotism, the isolation, the bewilderment,
the uncertainty. Nearer and nearer you
are appreaching yourself. Your are con- .
solidati lig your forces. You are becoming
master of the 'situation. Every ,wrong
road into which you hare wandered 'has
brought, you, by . the -kilowlecige . of that
mistake, so inueli Closer to the' truth.—
You -no longer draw your tiaist,, at a ven
ture, but.shoot .Stright: er,tho
Your posSibilitieS cone trace, and your
path,. ii(OleareCL . On .the ruins of shatter
ed-plans ; You yourvantage ground.—
You. broken hopes,. your thwarted pur.
poses, yoUr defeated aspirations become
a staff of strength with which you mount
tosublimer heights. With self:possession
and' S - elf-COM tuati'd return the 'possession
aml dm co 111 niattfl — Ofia I 1--t-Ifiliglg.—Tfie
title deed of di*ation, forfeited. is reclaiuri
-The king has come to his own'again. -
• Eayth and sea and sky pour out their ,
iciiges of love. All the past crowds down,
to ht , its treasures at your feet.—Gaild
C.
•
Antonini.—The law ruins mon and fash
ion women: • • - - •
_ There is a fitness in all things except cheap
clothes.
Wart bad thing to grumble—the wheel isn't
oiled till it ereahs. '
• . A. ro !ler is but a human version ortheturn
spit dog' that toiled - o Very day to roast meat
for persons eating. . • . - • . ,
A GOOD STORY
'ln the Editor's Drawer of Harper's
Magazine we find the followinggood story
of. Illinois soldiers and an Illinois Colonel
—the latter, Col. Oglesby, well known
to fame
Well, one day his fifer and drum-ma•
jors went out into the woods to practice
a new lune. Attracted, no doubt,.by the
melody, a fine fat shoat of musical pro•
clivities came near—alas ! for the safety
of his bacon, too near—for our bass-drum
mer, by a 'change of base,' made a base
attack on his front ; while the fifer, by a
bold and rapid flanlc movement, charged
him in the rear. 'Twas soon over ; few
well directed-volley of clubs and other
persuasives were applied, and piggy went
dead again—a martyr to his love for mu
sic! But, how-to get the deceased pork
into camp? 'That's what's the matter,'
now. After considerable discussion, an
idea strikes the drummer (not so hard as
to hurt him): 'We will put himln_ the
drum.' Jusetho thing, by hokey said
the fifer One head was taken out and
the hog stowed in, and our heroes start
ed for their quarters, carrying the drum
.between them. In the meantime, the
regiment went out for a dress parade ; and
the Colonel, somewhat vexed at the ab
sence of the principal musicians, no soon
er saw the gents than, in a voice of re•
primand, he ordered them to take their
places with the music. The drum bear
`erg - US If ar - , 'Tea t UT,'lit"
the Colonelbut said never a word.—
rhe Colonel repeated his order in a style
so eriPhatic tkat,it couldn't be misunder
stood. , The dealers in pork felt a crisis
had al-lived, and that an explanation had
become a 'military necessity.' So the
drummer, going up close to the Colonel,
made him acquainted with the status of
affairs, windin , up with. "We 'low Colo
nel, to bring the best quarter over to your
mess.' ,‘Eidk,. eh'?' thundered th_e_CiL
oriel , 'why didn't you say say so at
first Co to your quarters ?—of course !
Battalion, right face !' The Colonel had
fresh pork for supper.
PUZZLING A LAWYER
Everybody in Philadelphia, and out of
Philadelphia, we believe (says the Ger
mantoWn 'Airy ro7;11, ; ) knows, or has heard
of Uottlic•h Seheerer, a tall, robust, well
formed German, with a small, twinkling
eye, and a look that tells you quite as dis
tinctly as language, that he "knows a
thing or two." Being called upon the
stand as a witness on one occasion, he
was catechised rather severely, (as tl , e
story goes,) by Mr. Dallas, who expected
to make out a strong point, by enliciting
something from the following questions:
W-vrtre- y .it I larrisburg, Mr. Scheer -
or, iu Drcrnihcr
-I-1-a r h 1,41 rg-iit -Decl...;;A r,
say, r. Dal.as .
sir, I said, at:lliirrisburg,._
ceilibcr."
"Putting his head down thoulifully
for a Im:tient, lie replied :
" o, sir. I was tiot."
" Were you at H arrisburg iu January
Cr ?"
" At llarrib,tifg in January, did yut
say, 11-. Dallas?"
'• Yes, sir, at I larrisburg in .January "
Relapsing into a tbough,ful mood fat
a moment, he replie•l ;
" No sir, 1 was not in Ilarribburg in
Jan a ry."
" Mr Selieerer, were you in
Harrisburg in February ?"
" Did you say at Harrisburg in Febru
ary, Mr. Dallas ?"
" Ves, sir,—answer me if you please—
I said at Harrisburg in February."
Studying a moment i or two, as before ,
"No, sir, I was na at Harrisburg in
Febrtiary."
Getting somewhat out of patience with
him, Dallas elevated his tone and
fiercely demanded :
" At what time, then, sir, were you at
Harrisburg ?"
"At ? At Harrisburg, did
you say, Ml'. Dallas ?"
" Yes," yelled the now infuriated law
yer, "at flani,burg."
Again the head drooped, and the man
once more thought for a moment, but his
head suddenly raised, and, a emile playing
over his features, replied :
" Mr. Dallas, I ,was never at Harris
burg in my life."
' Of course the court adjourned instan
ter.
An Irish audience was always en 'rap.
port with the stage, and frequently com
wonted aloud on an absurdity in the ac-,
for public or private, in a manner to ex-
Cite quite as much laughter as any farce
) i . that might be going, on One night an
anxious friend in the pit, close to thug :
chestra, perceiving that his cousin once
stage, by an unlucky rent in a• critical
part of his dress, was exciting laughter
not set down in his part, put his hand to,
his mouth in an aside, and sahr, in. a
stage whisper : "Larry! Larry.! there's
the list° taste et life of yer linen to be
seen!"
—Mrs. Partington says sbe can't under
stand these -- ere market reports. she
ly, and pork can be active, and feathers
'drooping - -that islf-it's raining ;•but hoW'
whiskey Can be steady, or hops, quiet, or
spirits dull, she Can't see; neither how
lard can be firm in warm weather, nor cof-•
fee unsettled,. nor, potatoes depressed ;' nor`
flour• rising, --unless there has yeast put`
in it,--and sometimes it: would not rise
then. .3
119—The Cosamon,Sohool Trustees of a
town c: in Indiana; Isaia:a recent; report:
"No. oruitnion
,I3ranoties r taught t
sledge, vulgarity,-and profanity.!'
0
TERMS :--$1,50 in Advance, or $2 within the year
The buys were in the habit of driving
their father's sheep to this spot, and then
vexing time old rain, until he would pitch
at. them, with all his !night, when they
would drop flat down and let the old ram
go headlong over thew, front the top of
the rock into the deep water be1cm7 ;. ,,, ,,
his was rare spot t for the by es t f}iut
one day the deacon canilit I
very act of giving old "Thunippe..7" : 7 *l4tttb
and dealt with theta as he felt:
boun 1 to do for such wicked-tAFAOss
Some timeafiorwards, time deatiiisß)Okuited .
tinnctirtire• - a - for - C - d -- r - o - OtTutni*O4t h e
Qhcon feeding near it, he fetti * ooo, in
•
ram 9 ) l 4 oi''A# 7
V.
-
plunge into the water.
An cr lo; king about to make sure that
no one was in sight to witness his folly,
he eruuclied down. on the edi,'Oackfthe rock,
and made a show of fi:Art"Jiagaitist old
"Thumper," who accepted the challenge,
and charged with all his force so rapidly
that the deacon being rather slow, Mid
fail:ng to drop in time, went over the
rock headlong into the water along with
hitn:
Ilere was a fix for a deacon to be caught
in, sure enom , b ; and, to add to his now
tifie:l6oll, by the tinie he and his rain gut
out of the water, the boys were standing,
on the rock above him, laughing must
boisterously. The deacon went off home
—the boys told of his mishap—and the
old man is called "Deacon Slow" to this
day. •
An Irish orator in a recent speech intnie
the following capital parody on certain
lines by his countryman, 'loin Moore :
The Ii 0i that Is gull d Hover harbors a doubt,
But no truly Is gulled to the close.
As a bull, if you once sot a ring thro' his snout,'.
liver after Is led by Chu nose.
A Yankee pet describes the excess of
his devotion to his true love.
A negro having been brought beforo a
magistrate. and zonvieted ot pilfering, the
magistrate began to remonstrate. "Do
yell know howto .read r '' Yes, massa,
little," • Well, don't you ever, make use
of the Bible Y" " Yes massa, strap my
razor on him sometimes."
At rish lawyer lately addressed the
'court as "gentlemen " instead of "your
honors" A brother of the bar remind
ed him of his error.. He immediately
rose to apologise thus: "May it please
the court, in the heat of debate I called
your honors gentkien in mistalo."
gicLyvWit. H. Clark, the editor of the Ken
dall (111•) Clarion, loiteii a good jukl3, and
never lets an oppoi tunity slips that promises
a dish of fun. Here is his last :
DISGUISED.-Y 0 have lately,,,got a suit
of clothes, and no..mauppold be nitre effect-
Inlay...disguised. We look like a genflernan.
'Upon first putfing' them on, we felt liken cat
in a strange garret; •and for .a long time
. tlkought ikwere swapped_off..—ille we t_tti.
the lionse, mid scared the baby into fits ,• our .
wife asked us if we wanted to seCi.hlr'.:Clark;.
and told ni.that wo would lintikirir•at
office; went there, and!,pretti:.serin.litie Of.
business niett came in, wit h;a`.6fiii): 4 PrPf.:kiri` .
in his hand. Ile asked if the editor was in;
,told him wo thought, not; naked . him if' he .
wished to see hitt particuleirlyf,itaiti - ho waokf+ .
,ed'hiiit.tO pay that;:ttild_liih
m we didt
believe he would, be in 4.businestimatt.left.
Started:to the house again nietw' couple of
:Young one of them' asked the other:
4.What....liandsonto stranger is
this . dderarna we met - a friend and nliim'
wlo.wo were, and got., him,,to introdnee us
16'4)1ft:wife, who is,nowas pieuttof us as Can
be. ,The next time :we geta -1-(tity snit ; w 9.
shall let her know it beforehand. .' • '
DEATH
Our hearts Sadden at the sight of death
taking away the man of many wrinkles
and silvery locks, tottering steps and fee
ble pulse ; but oh ! we sicken when we
beh9ld him take the babe in its artless in
nocence and perfect simplicity, (upon
whom life has just dawned) even smil
ing at the approach of its foe. And then
when he comes to the ingenuous youth
with the fire of life in his ey6, and the
swelling. tide of hope in his countenance;
or to the lovely maiden with life's activi
ty in her lorm add blood on her cheek, and
her heart all aglow with youth's freshness
of affection, and her soul filled with pure
and happy emotions, we turn away with
a shudder, and regret sin brought death
into our world. With all the un loveliness
with which we have 'portrayed Death, he
comes in one lovely form. Geßtly he
shuts the Christian's eye—tenderly stills
the beating pulse—softly folds his icy
mantle around him, and meekly bears
him away. There is something indescri
bably lovely about death when he comes
to the Christian. See the eye, how calm
its expression: the brew, how placid;
and the lips uttering the delight of the.
enraptured soul, as it beats its wings us
gainst the walls of the prison house,
longing for death to release it There
is nothing unwt.lcome in the visits of
Death to the pious. lie knows'tis Death
who will open the portals of eternal bliss
to `iiiB — imn tenr slitrit - T - Irrtd- - -thereforc
meets him with a smile of recognition as
his best friend.
"There aro charms Death ran nnt raf,t,"
And they are thine—pun• Ii re and holy trust
The Deacon and his Ram
A short distance front the line which
divides Massachusetts and. New [lamp
shire, lives a pious-old deacon, who fears
the Lord and detests levity. The deacon
owns a ram, a -- savage fellow, always ready
for a fight, and this belligerent spirit the
old gentleman's two suns took advantage
of.
The deacon's farm has a stream of wa
ter running through it, on the bank of
which there is a ruck extending close to
the water fur some distance, and about
ten feet above it, and which cannot be
seen 11 - oin the house. •
"I sing her praise in poet; y;
Fc her it morn and eve
I cries whole pints of bitter tears,
Aid wipes them with ray sleeve."
=ME
RECITATION IN GEOGIILAin't:
Seventeenth•olassin llientalGeograpby arise
and group yoursolvestogether. Toe the &sok
—heads up like yeast, and.don'titalkthrougli
your DOW
What is Geography r
Don't know.
That's right,- sonny—never tell o; lie
What is the surface of the earth-?
The outside. , • -
Bully for you, sweet William.
Which predominates—that is, which is the'
biggest part, land or water?
•
• In the rainy Bent3ol . l, water, in tiinea of .
drought, land.
What is the big body of water called?
Old Ocean.
What does it benefit?"
The Secretary of the llTu7,y and hie rera
lives in the ship trade.
Ilpw so ?
They sell rotten ships to the Government)
for ten times their worth.
NO. 25.
That is right, my bully boy, with a WO*
ear; you shall ace Gon. Pope some day.
What, is a sea?
Pair of spectacles
What is a strait ?
Next to a flush—boats two part.
What is a channel ?
The place a felloW oils up with wiskey just
before he makes a political speech.
Correct, glad to see you in such spirits.
Thomas, what is a Peninsula ?
A place where the army of the United Stated•
meanders, surrounded by a Stonewall.
What is a cape?
A fur thing worn by ladies.
Peter, what is a cave ?'
The last Democratic vote in Connecticut.
Now tell me what are the great circles of
earth?
Hoops ?
Very good. Can you tell me what a bal
moral skirt rereimN you of ?.
The peel of a bele.
Next.
The earth'. \
Bight, but why so f
Because the sun works around it eVery
twenty four hours.
That's right—go up head.
What aro the principal productions of tho
temperate zones?
Teti pin alleys, rot gutythe Maine' law and
confirmed drunkards.
AN AMUSING SCENE
Here is an amusing scene from the vaude
ville of the Prisoner of Rhochelle, which, says
a Paris journal, keeps the audience in a roar
of laughter every night of its performance
, -Corpitral Cart ouch" amuses himself while
“"fieza;" -. senteri - arter wnrk—tableTabstract--
edly que,tions him concerning matrimony.
- I,eza:—lf a girl would fall in love with you,
(57)ritoral, what would you do 1
Corporal—(Manoeuvering with his mus
ket ) Present arms!
L —She would doubtless look to you for—
('. SupporL !
L —And what a heavy burden you'd have
to—
C.—Carry I
L.—Your butcher and baker would have
UZIEI
C —Charge !
L —And your prospeots, of course - would
not—
C.—Advance!
L —And you'd ha've to—
' C. — . Bout face!
L.—And nevee — have any— _
C. —Rest !
L.—Now, Corporal pray give me your—
C.—Attention !
L.—A man of your years is not able to
bear such a—
C —Load!
L.—But you aro not in your
C.—Prime !
L.—And then you will have to bear all on
your—
C.— Shoulder !
L.—You should be—
!
L.-1 think you have some other—
(' !
L—Aud you'd throw all:your epistles Into
t he
C.—liire! (fi . tte((" .44e , musket.)
The Captain and 11:41 1, 07# Pperhead.
A few days ago a youngpSitiAii in the army
of tho P. a ()mac, w hoAti#o642_one_of the
Nort h ern Counties of l. 4ict'„,i4lollfda,' happened
to be standing in a stny,ktf ‘ ftiitikrisburg, when
vnrude thin wearing ,
one of the copperheiqgemes arier. ; „i
s doe of the rehel.sginptith4efs of the North
delightto div , zrace Soule ene in
the store spoke tollike tlteiy,.oomer about his
copperhead otataninnt,4o4 4 lbUs attracted the
a t tent ion of the C apt " What," said
lie. ,•do you wear such thing as that?"—
" Yes " I said the dandy, "Does that repre
sent yonr "Yes." "Well, sir,
1 belong to the tidally of the Potomac; and I
tell you to take that thing otf and throw
it into the street." "You must be joking"
said the copperhead. "No, sir, I am not
j 'king; P insist on you doing it." Copper
head fumed awhile, but the more he ..bloomed"
the inure emphatic became the commands of
the Captain ; and finally, when the latter put
his hand into his pocket as if to enforce his
orders with the revolver he carried there,
opperhead succumbed, and flung the dis
graceful trinket into the street. It is doubt
ful whether lie will take pains to flaunt the
evidences of his love of treason in. public
quite so freely ininture.
AT a young ladies,, seminary, a few days
since during an examination in history, one :4
of the mit most promising pupils was interro
gated :
"Mary, did Martin Luther .dio a natural
death 7"
"No," was the prompt reply 3 "he was ex
communicated by a boll!"
TN one of the New York, churches, recent
ly, the clergyman concluded hie" sermon ns
follows:
"But I hoar the rustling of silks in the
pews, as if some of the ladies were impatient
to leave; I will, therefore, say, God bless
you 1" -
BARRY CORNWALL says :
"Come, let me dive into thine eyes!"
If his love hail>. "swim:l:frig eyes," very
goo I ; but, at all events, our advice to the
young woman is, for divers reasons, don't let;
him do it. He might go oier'a "cataract 1"
A NEW ORLEANS paper says that the cor
sets worn by the ladies of that city will boar
a monstrous strain, judging from a-lady he
saw, who was so nearly cuvin two, that a man
would be considered amenable for...l:pigmy
should he marry her.
,0 4 40 .17
orhaman
QUESTIONS FOR DEBATING Soci
the traveler who took the eoti
events hati,zlzer been heara
If brass vi!ll'lnt 'co
will make one let 100.
If the. hollow of a to
If tin will make a ear
Can't,
If twelve inches in .lin alboy,hOw many
will it take to mak 4%1? ..
„_..:. -t..
If
If five and a ha Olio ' inAke atie,pole,
e j e
how inany'will i, ta ';i , to make a-logl;,-..,....1; ,1'.,"
____'' IlLortY rOmftitke.A.lll - doini,_itqw—ntin,y-';
- wilfitlak - olf oTriniiituit - siii, , A-rott4;jr,,_ .
:,, ' •
.-. rib potarpes ever Wear oat, \art
~Wer'::fitive , .._
often lasera of potatoe patches;;?' .
, .If 'pl•pens will do to write ''vvi&
‘Vik:the 'cape of Goad li(ipe fit a lady.? . ,
Val' the' drawers of a bureau fit'it' gentle
a -l i ,, touuta,--wbUu-uultoopecl,--fall. to -
'staves. • - - ' : . " •
A Nov.isr, rAItADE. - 411 - ViiiilCl6l3, 4., Ott
Priddy afternoon,wwenty,„afght soldi , Wider
;,
command of 'alit Louiii:toeb, all :o ....0414 . 3nct
hAd toiltAlpg in im.ttio, p ar aded — tgl..f.:Ob' '''
Vreeta on - ordioliea'.. Others --aocoMpai.iiiiii',,--
them who lost an arpa
.. ittid '-wv.irif- 00- 1 0-0 4 4 0 - -'
Wounded. The paradii . 4 . as - .4tfonded — Wiqt .
ragoio: 1111 -drOircied a trAly novel an'dikEectint, .
, ,:.• .''' ;Y't.'4i
Ono;
iltick, what
be heard, . ;„
' t ',l',llvAt
nittio'is