VOL XXXIX Grand Clearance Sale RUMMER FOOTWEAR Bickel's. We have commenced a Grand Clearance Sale of all Summer Footwear. We have too many Summer Shoes and Oxfords and will not carry a pair over. Every pair must go during this SALE and will go at awav down prices. Men's *4 oo V\ t It Sole Shoes $2 25 MtnV $.) oo Patent Kid Oxfords 2 25 Latiu »' $3 .50 We t Sole, Patent Kid Oxfords 225 L;.i!i < Patent Leather Oxfords ► Patent Kid * Bluchers < Vici Kid Colonials Take Your Choice . Velour Calf Sembrich Ties * Wax Calf Oxford Button * I Welt Soles or Turn Soles 18 £ e ° n 2l a ► -yp- a aq nn Shoe Storo in town i , #OO tO SO.UU. bnt it is the only place . k" to buy the newest and smartest styles. W We get more style and more wear into our shoes at a given M price than any one else you know of. > k Heavy Shoes for Farmers and Mechanics made to stand a lot of i J A mauling and scraping, but GOOD LOOKERS and plenty of toe fI room, 95c to $2.00. ► \ *£ HllQpltATl'Q < f asicto nuscium 5. 5 a be fit. rm M The most satisfactory k Shoe Store in Butler. f A $ The Finest Boot For Ladies J s Ever seen in Butler is our ? \ New Patent Ideal Kid Boot. S \ It will not break through. Always locks bright. Is S C thoroughly up-to-date. Will out wear two pairs of old v I fashioned patent leather. * C S $3.50 A PAIR > C and worth it. 7 \Daubeqspeck Turner) } THE NEW SHOE STORE, ) 108 S. MAIN ST. } KECK a Spring & Summer Weights 'T. 1 /i (\ |j Have a natliness about tbem that J] r) wf L // |\ mark the wearer, it won't do to ' -' J \ [A/ W B1 wear the last year's output. You \J ' S~C/ £i won't get the latest things at the 1 * I / if~? ra stock clothiers either. The up-to I l ih\ Jif /"N a * e tailor only can supply them, . 11/ Y4 I/IITIf xJ y° u want not on 'y l he latest (J .1 I I )111 a I things in cut and fit and work l It | l/l manship, the finest in durability, ,11 j I I where else can you get combina •"■l I If 111 9 tions, you get them at ** KECK F. KECK, Merchant Tailor, 112 North Main Street All Work Guaranteed Butler,Pa JUST RECEIVED Another Large Shipment A great assortment of miJ-suuimei styles, an endless variety of hats. A b pretty, serviceable and practical hat ' I can be sfllected from our large assort W 1 ment of trimmed hats from SI.OO up- 1 AI ward Our $3.98 hats exceed in quality f fnffr/fy . ■mm anything ever offered at the price lOft J. 4B Value ahd style are delightfully com- (& bindt-d in our latest Summer hats, the J . == dispUy is decidedly interesting; also Our j)rices are away down beyond com petition. Come and see them. Roc kenstei n's, MILLINERY EMPORIUM. 318 South Main Street, - - - - Butler, Pa THE BUTLER CITIZEN. Aft< r yt n've worn a leady made s. it ;i week, take another 1 <4; the elaborate ly ti i.>:r.tti h'jy ii 'l l d 1 otice how dif fic ti, 11 appeals to your t'm t t -11 : We on't make much of a i-pluiiji "i p. Pr; we lut our ad. into >. 1 th. Fhe ad. begins u!>. Ny 1 u put on the clothes a d i: endures for weeks and se ! Our priors lii 14ii only to the man who never woie one of our suits. A. la n. d, i 7 MAKER OF MEN'S CLOTHES. RUNNING CHANCES is the man who Duys the cheap and poorly made clothing simply because it is cheap. There are just as good bar gains to be bad in good grades of goods, such for instance as our f2O suits. Running Chances is the man who j rushes from this "alteration sale" to j that "closing out bargains." The safe | way is to patronize the firm that does ; business on the same principles you do. 1 You know what you have to deal with ; then. You get honest goods for honest prices, and don't save twenty-five cents here to throw away seventy-five cents there. Chances are Not Running away from ! you, but yon are running away from the chances for the best bargains of the year in suits, when you fail to look at our suitings. Wedding Suits a Specialty. COOPER, Leading Tailor, 333 S. Main St., BUTT.FR PA. B. B. men buy by mail here—thousands of them, all over America—same as the woman do Saves you money on Clotliing, Shirts, Underwear, Neckwear and Dress Furnishings by sending here —and besides, you get selection from largest variety of very latest genteel styles. Men who get our Catalogue and consult specially pages 67, 68. 84-89, will find goods and prices of practical Interest. We're selling a top notch Neg lige Shirt for men SI.OO —made by people who have fine fit and finish dou n to a science— your choice of Plain White Madras, or colored striped or figured Madras, pleated front, separate cufts. Give us your idea as to style and we'll give you benefit of best selection. Women who are interested in goods for a cool stylish waist or waist suit want to send for samples and see the pretty Corded Wash Silks here as low as 35c yard. Boggs & Buhl Department X. ALLEGHENY. PA. \ When you are sick and{ > Vwant your prescriptions filled4 > Vbring them or send them to, , CNo. 213, we will deliver fat your door, r.o extra charge. IWe have a new full line of r drugs the best that money i rcan buy. We handle * ' rbut the best. Good * * /and pure drugs go hand in< > ■ hand. You can not get re-< > * Isults from cheap > < ilf you had the best doctor in< > { So if you wish pure< > i and good L < vbuy your medicine at No., . if2l3 South Main Street. ;r CAMPBELL'S ][ Pharmacy, m < C Successor to ( 1 > i[ J. P. SUTTOir I > L. S. McJUNKIN Insurance and Real Estate Agent. 117 E. JEFFERSON. PUTLER. - PA j ittarncl fcShwKl ToQ CMn iuke your h*r- fIHB VwvH nna M *° n u * (love /HnHa MBT HI and as toogb aa wire by T » M\l using EUREKA Har- H/jS l naaa Oil. Too can W/MBI / WSKU fi le lta 11*—make t« LW WMUVM last twin as loot aa it IMMKM ordinarily would. TEUREKAf I Harness Oil I BK makes a poor lookloc bar ■ ness like new. Mada of M' pure, heavy bodied oU, ea aggl peclally prepared to wltb stand the weather. Sp s£tj Bold everywhere iIHK fSB In cans—all slzaa. V^K S Mida bj STANDARD OIL CO. \V I Nasal CATARRH In all 1U stages. /I>- JUc# Ely's Cream Balrav YFmß^^/ cleanses, soothes and heals t m the diseased membrane. It cures catarrh and drives away a cold in the head quickly. Balm is placed into the nostrils, spreads over the membrane and is absorbed. * Relief is im mediate and a cure follows. It is not drying—does not produce eneeziug. Large Size, 50 cents at Drug gists or by mail; Trial Size, 10 cents. N Johnston's M W Beef, Iron and Wine Dj Best Tonic Blood Purißer. Ll Price, 50c pint. f t L' * Prepared and W W sold[only at] J Johnston's > Crystal H I Pharmacy, M ml B. M. LOGAN, Ph. G . LV Maimger, 6? < WA ICS N. Butler, Pa [ V Both 'Phones W A Everything in the Lv drug line. VA '-.xJ We Guarantee ALL THE PAINT we sell ancTthe largest paint M'f'g Co. in the world (The Sherwin- Williams Co.) stand back of u s in this guarantee. Does that mean anything to our paint customers? You will do well to consider this proposition. Estimates cheerfully furnished. REDICK & GROHMAN, 109 N. Main St., Butler, Pa. Eugene Morrison GENERAL CONTRACTING PAINTER and DECORATOR. Special attention given to FINE PAPER HANGING GRAINING and HARDWOOD FINISHING. Office and Shop, Rear of Ralston's Store, Residence No. 119 Cliff St. I'eopie » Phone 451. EYTH BROS' Big Wall Paper Store, Next to Postoffice. Special bargains in Wall Faper, Window Blinds and Room Mould ings. Farmers find good accom modation and satisfaction here. EYTH BROS., Formerly, C. B. McMILLIAN, 'PJione4s3. 251 S. Main St, BUTLER, PA- THURSDAY, JUNK 19, 1902 ! UNCLE JERRY'S f ! CONSENT O ... BY C. B. LEWIS o 3 Copyright, 1002, ♦ By the S. S. McClure Company ♦ ♦©♦o^o^o^o^o^o^o^o^o^o^o# Jeremiah Mead, farmer, money lend er, bargain driver and tight fisted citizen of Blair county, had earned the name of a hard man. His wife was submissive to servility. His son George, their only child, had grown up in fear of him and after reaching his majority still worked on without wages. Jeremiah had forclosed mortgages without mercy, to had lent money at usurious iuterest, and no one could re member a neighborly act on his part Uncle Jerry, as he was called, knew that he was la bad odor all over the county, but he rather gloried In it. It was seldom that the sou George had a dollar of his own or a day's vaca tion, but he made few complaints, no matter what he thought of the situa tion. Having none of the father's characteristics, he was a general favor ite. as far as people knew him. At ONE MOVE OF HIS HAND WOULD HAVE RESULTED IN A THOUSAND STINGS. the age of twenty-one he had never spoken to five members of the opposite sex and was as bashful as a girl of sixteen. The crisis of his young life occurred one day when, driving sheep "over to the Ilawßonville market he passed the farmhouse of the Widow Blair. He was just in time to assist the hired man, the widow and her daughter Pol ly to extinguish a fire In the barn. Al though he hurried on as soon as pos sible, he bad left his heart behind with Polly. Nothing was said about his adven ture when he returned home, and bash ful as he was be bad managed to see Polly half a dozen times and excite her Interest before the news reached the fa ther's ears. After a little reflection Uncle Jerry went to the field where George was hoeing potatoes. "Look here. George. It's about time you got married. The house Is big enough for another family, and of course you have no thoughts of leaving home. I guess you'd better shine up to Jim Taylor's gal. She ain't much on looks, as I'll allow, but I've heard she was a great worker. There's go ing to be a circus lu Rawsonville next week, and I don't mind giving you a dollar to take her along." George mauaged to reply that be didn't think he'd get married for awhile yet "Well, there's no hurry, of course, but lemme tell you something. I've heard that you was casting sheep's eyes toward the Widder Blair's. You might as well quit that I'd rather see you in your grave than married Into that family." "Isn't the widow a nice woman?" asked George. "No, sir, she ain't!" decisively re plied the father. "1 had two lawsuits With her about ten years ago, and she beat me iu both. I'd also have got the prize on hogs at the county fair last year If she hadn't had six of hers there. She's the last woman on earth I want related to me. Better go over to Tay lor's tonight and ask Sarah to go to the circus with you." But George didn't, and a month later he almost paralyzed his father by say ing: "Dad, I have asked Polly Blair to marry me, and she has consented." "Jerusha, but you don't mean It!" shouted the father as he jumped clear off the ground. "I do," was the quiet reply. "But you can't marry her, George. 1 forbid you to. I'll never give my consent to any such thing. If you want to marry, go over and ask Sarah Taylor to have you." "I'll never do It!" There was open rebellion at last the first time the son had ever questioned parental authority. Dncle Jerry's first thought was to lock the boy up In the smokehouse, the next* to threaten to disinherit him. Then bis sbrewduess came to his aid, and be said: "We won't say no more about It Just now, but when we come to have a talk 1 guess we cau agree." Three days later be drove up to the Widow Blair's. He Intended to pitch In so vigorously that the widow and her daughter would order him off the place aud his son after him. As he ilrove up he saw the widow out In the erchard and heard her drummlug on a tin pan. He turned In that direction. He was thinking of how he should open the matter when something buz *ed past his ear, and ten seconds later he found his head in a circling cloud of beea. One of the widow's hives was swarming. No matter whether the bees took him for a rosebush or a sun flower, they began settling down on his head and shoulders. In five min utes he was almost hidden from sight and perfectly helpless. One move of his hand would have resulted In a thousand stings. "Well, Uncle Jerry," said the widow as she carefully advanced, "I was rath er expecting you. I am glad you've come. I suppose yon want to talk about George and Polly getting mar fipd ?" ,( Y-ye«," softly replied the caller. '1 came to say that I have told George It mustu't be." "Oh, you did! Well, 1 quite agree with you, and yoi can go back home." "But how can I go?" "Any way you wish. If you carry the bees home, I hope you'll bring them back tomorrow." "But I can't do It!" he wailed. "1 dasu't move a foot If the bees get mad, I'm a dead man!" "Yes, to be sure, but I've got other work oq hand. I don't think you'll £ave to stand here over 9 week before the beea will find the new hive." "Lord, widder, but you won't leave me in this fix! You couldn't have the heart to do it!" "Oh. It's no use to talk about hearts!" she replied. "George and Polly have both got hearts, but it's nothing to us. 1 wonder just how many bees are hanging to your right ear!" "Millions, widder, millions," he hoarsely whispered, "and millions more to my hat and hair and chin! Can't they be scraped off?" "Not today. Uncle Jerry. I hear you don't like me." "But I do. You beat me In them lawsuits, but you ought to, 1 guess." "But you don't like Polly." "Yes, I do. Polly is the nicest girl in all this county." "She Is that, but how you move about! You must stand as steady as a tree. Yes, Polly Is a nice girl." "But do something for me!" he en treated. "llow can I? You don't like we, and you don't want George and Polly to marry, and"— "Widder Blair," came the whispered words from amid the bees, "I like you. I like Polly." "And George?" "lie may marry Polly tomorrer. Hang It, only get these bees ofTn me, and George and me will marry the hull caboodle of you before sundown!" Uncle Jerry's word was considered as good as his bond, and half an hour later, by careful manipulation, the bees were hived and he was free to go. ; Pale faced and weak in the knees, he drove into the barnyard, calling to his I sou: | "George go over to the Widder ! Blair's tonight and ask Polly if she'll ! be ready to marry you a week from | today. l " An Obliging Caller. When M. Clemenceau was in the French chamber of deputies, he be came for some reasou the Idol of the workiugman, but his popularity, ae cording to the course of nature, brought Its penalties. lie was besieged by all sorts of people, who came merely to ask questions, and sometimes they were questions of the most trivial sort. He was originally n doctor and used to give advice for nothing at certain hours of the day. One morning a work iugman entered his room, and Clemen ceau said without looking up from his writing: "Take off your c»al and shirt I'll atteud to you directly." Three minutes later he found the man had stripped to the. waist "There Is nothing the matter with you," said the doctor when he had made an examination. "I know there isn't!" returned the man. "Then what did yon come for?" "To consult you on a political ques tlon." "But what did you atrip for?" "I thought you wanted an illustra tlon of the emaciated body of the man who lives by the sweat of his brow." The political question remained un answered. M. Clemenceau was too ex asperated to do more than tell the man to dress and go home. Took a Slow Train. "I want to go to Lancaster," said a nervous looking old woman as she peer ed through at the ticket seller in the Broad street station. "Will you kindly tell me when the next train goes?" "The next train leaves at 11:40," was the reply. "And when does it reach Lancas ter?" asked the old woman. "It's a two hour express; gets there ■t 1:40." "Goodness me! I don't like to travel to fast I'm afraid of accidents." "No danger at all, madam, I assure you." "But surely yon have slower trains." "Oh, yes: there's one at 12:40, that doesn't get to Lancaster until 3:10." "Well. I guess I'll wait for that one. There's no use in taking any unneces sary risks." Aid she bought her tick et to Lancastei and sat down to wait for the slow ti ain.—Philadelphia Rec ord. Famoua Knblai. The largest ruby known is one men tioned by Chardin as having been en graved with the name of Sheik Sephy. Another noble ruby is in possession of the shah of Persia. Its weight Is put at 175 carats. A third, belonging to the king of Usapar, was cut into a hemispherical form and in 1853 was bought for SI3.BGG. A ruby possessed by Gustavus Adolphus and presented to the czarina at the time of his jour ney to St. Petersburg was the size of a small ben's egg. "Jfo Interference." There is one thing anarchists will not consent to, one thing they rebel against (at least In thought, and sometimes in act), and that is anybody's assumption to rule another, whether it be czar, king, nobility or a democrat majority, says William M. Salter in The Atlantic. They are disagreed about many things. There are Individualist anarchists and socialist (or communist) anarchists, be lievers in private property and believ ers in common property, but ail alike believe in self rule, and they are as much opposed to democratic state socialism as to state socialism of any kind. They believe that power intoxicates the best of men and are not willing to allow it in any form. "No master, high or low," they say, after William Morris. "Let life shape itself," "Mind j our own busi ness," "No Interference"—such is their demand. The Great Value of Savins: Time. Thrift of time is as necessary as thrift of money, and he who knows how to save time has learned the se cret of accumulating educational op portunity. Men who regard it as sin ful to waste money waste time with a prodigal's lavlshness because they do not understand the value of short periods of time. Society is full of peo ple who might enrich themselves a hundredfold and make their lives im mensely more Interesting if they learn ed this commonplace truth.—Ladies' Home Journal. The Word Treacle. The word treacle has undergone an odd modification. At first it was applied to such decoctions of roots or other sub stances as were deemed beneficial in medical practice; theu. as these were frequently sweetened, it came to mean any sweet concoction or confection, and lastly, as molasses was the sweet est of all, this name was exclusively applied to sirup. Helping a Fellow Out. He (who stutters badly)—l lul-lul love you mum-mum—l lul-love you mum-mum-more than tut-tut-tongue tan tut-tut—more than tut-tut-tongue ■an tut-tut— She (eagerly)— Don't you know the deaf and dumb alphabet*' Were I to speak my whole mind 1 should dare to say that men are made for laughter and women for tears.—La Claviere. "The Art of Life." THE JOUNCER. An t'p to r»ntc Device For Freeing; Extracting Snperi From Bees. One of the chief up to date appli ances in my apiary is known as a joun cer. Some four or five years ago I de serilied with pen and pencil my first jouncer, and it was a very crude af fair compared with the one in use at JOCKCKIt FOB CLEANING SUi'EllS. present. The pictures show the device and bow to use it. says Rambler in Gleanings In Bee Culture. It will be observed that it is made very strong, mostly of tough fir, and put together with bolts, and a cloth tray is adjusted under the hive to be jounced. When it is desired to jounce the bees from a super, it is adjusted, as in Fig. 1, and the whole jounced against the ground. The sudden jar or a few of tbem send the bees all into the tray. The latter cau be removed, as shown in Fig. 2, and the bees dumped on the top of the frames of the colony. In order to cushion the lower ends of the corner posts of the Jouncer they are chamfered off to a point. As there are no stones in the apiary, when the jouncer strikes the ground the jouncer is broken just enough to prevent the combs from breaking. The benefits derived from this meth od of getting bees off the combs are ail iu the line of rapid manipulation. In the American Bee Journal not many months ago Mr. Davenport caught on to this idea aud applied it to the com mon L;:ugstroth hive. The best suc cess, however, is attained with a shal low brood chamber, and the only ob jection I have to it is when there is much thin honey it slops out upon the bees. But, of course, it is best to wait until the honey is thick. It is hard to make people believe that any new way HOW THE JOtJNCER GETS THE BEES. is better than their way. Whether beekeepers use the Rambler's jouncer t»r not, 1 hope the beekeepers will dis card the old, obsolete use of a brush. Bees can be shaken off the combs clean enough. In central California but few brushes are used. 1 have great hopes for the shallow extracting super. Mr. Davenport says the jouncing principle is worth SSO a year to him even with -the staudard frames. The Wlalrr Wheat Condition, Orange Jndd Farmer declares winter wheat in a sensitive condition. Corre spondents report the winter unfavora ble in Texas. Similar condition exists in Arkansas, in Tennessee and Ken tucky. In Ohio two-thirds of the coun ties report the winter unfavorable. Michigan has bad ample snow protec tion. In Indiana and Illinois the situa tion is doubtful. Kansas makes a far better showing, and Nebraska has an other story. In the latter state the acreage is the largest on record and tiie prospect declared ns good as ever known. Conditions on the Pacific coast are almost entirely favorable except an unimportant section of southern Cali fornia. POTATO CULTURE. Good Intensive Prnetlee Accordion? to Connecticut Ideas. Anything under 300 bushels of pota toes to an acre should be an unsatis factory crop where good, intensive cul tural methods are practiced, and this may l;e sarpafsed by llfty to seventy live bushels in good seasons, says an American Cultivator correspondent. To makea full crop of potatoes there must lie preparation and rotation of crops in order t > counteract the effects of the rot. scab and striped beetles. There is no better way to £et rid of these dis eases than to turn the land over to grass iiiui corn after the secmid year. A good crop i f clover after the pota toes will fertilise the land and make it ready for a crop of << :*n or wheat, which will ei:i::e i:i to 1 • , i:p i!:e aver age profit of the land. The n:eehanical conditions or the so ! < tallied by this rotation heips ily i . ..id making the potato eiop a large n::e.' With rich soil obtained in ties way and by j;;>od manuring a:;d line seed the I eglnning is favorable rnoi:gb to war rant great expectation:;. I lit this n; .y be partly count era te.l i y I: ii s<: >i s. That is sor.iethiu-; teat i e ear:; t help, but we can M't the crop in such condition that the injury will lie somewhat limited. I have raised 800 bushels of potatoes to an acre when others have found their crop cut down to 200 and less by the weather and diseases. The whole difference has been in the start and the conditions of the soil and the seed. When the clover is turned under with the plow, the roots of the clover will be equivalent to a good dressing with rich manure. The wheat which may follow will leave plenty of fertilizer in the soli for the crop of potatoes, and the early crop yill hardly require any further fertilizing. The pulverization of the soil must be made thorough, for we cannot get the land into any too good condition for tlie potatoes. The perfect cultivation of the soil early in the season enables the land to warm up so that the seed can be put in early, and early planting is always desirable. The potato will grow in a ' comparatively cold soil, and a low tem perature will not kill it so quickly as some imagine. It is certainly worth the effort to get an early crop of pota toes. for the profits are almost sure to be larger than for the later crop. NEW FRUIT. Perfection Currant, Which Won the lfarry Medal For Special Merit. ! The cut, from American Agricultur ist. shows the new Perfection currant, which obtained the Barry gold medal from the Western New York Horticul tural society for a new fruit of special merit. Professor" New York is ■ intermediate be- of cluster and which" has yet been dissenlnat- THE PERFECTION CUB. ed. The fruit is EANT usually uniformly large to the tip of the cluster. Its largest berries are ful ly equal to the largest of the Comet. While on the average its fruit is not quite so largo as that of the Comet, its clusters average longer. The pulp is less seedy and considerably better in quality. The stem of the cluster is free from berries near its attachment to the plant, thus making it easy to pick. The color is a good red, somewhat lighter than the Fay. In flavor and quality I consider It distinctly better than Fay or Cherry. In fact, I do not know of any other large currant in cultivation that is its equal in this respect. It ripens about with Fay and Cherry." Fine Tree* For the Hoc Lot. For a hog lot there is nothing like the mulberry tree, according to a writer in an exchange. Plant your lot full of the best trees you can find, choosing them both for form and fruit. Have a lot of the ever bearing among them, ?nd when feed Is scarce you have the -ery best for your hogs and poultry, l'hey will bear bushels to the tree and will be growing In value every year as timber. The timber is equal to catalpa in value and grows as rapidly. It Is fine for pists and shows beautiful graining in 'umber. Arrlcaltnral Notes. The white mustard is a favorite va riety for greens. Ben Davis outnumbers old New Eng land favorites in the recent orchard plantings of nearly every state. In Maine and Vermont the drift toward Ben Davis is especially pronounced, vbile even In Massachusetts it is rap »ly gaining on Baldwin. Onions should never be put in a soil that is foul or that has been too re cently fertilized with barnyard manure unless the manure has been well rot ted. In a test at one of the stations it ap peared that eggs laid by cabbage fed hens, although heavier and possessing n higher percentage of protein and fat, were Inferior in flavor to those laid by hens which had a ration of clover. Three Rale* For Fishing. One day as the Rev. Mark Guy Pearse of London was strolling along a river bank be saw an old man fishing for trout and pulling the fish out one after the other briskly. "You manage it cleverly, old friend," he said. "I have passed a good many below who don't seem to be doing anything." The old man lifted himself up and stuck his rod in the ground. "Well, you see, sir, there be three rules for fish ing, and 'tis no good trying it if you don't mind them. The first Is, Keep yourself out of sight; the second Is, Keep yourself further out of sight, and the third is. Keep yourself further out of sight still. Then you'll do it" Didn't Know Her. "What has become of Miss Blank, who was always such a favorite In your set?" "Her father failed some weeks ago, nnd all they had was sold at auction." "Poor thing!" "And now they have to live in a lit tle house In the suburbs." "What a change! How she must feel It!" "Yes. She is so much changed that even her best friends would not recog nize her. I met her in the street to day and did not know her at all? poor thing." Hatched Passlera. "Papa," said the inquisitive young ster, "why Is It that people rescued from drowning are always saved Just as they are going down for the third time?" "Why Is it," returned the father, "that a small boy always picks out unanswerable questions to ask?"— Ch icago Post. Not One of His Traits. "A Darwinian, are you?" said Slopay argumcntatively. "Then you don't be lieve we were made of dust." "I don't believe you were," replied his tailor. "Dust settles occasionally, you know."—Philadelphia Press. Misunderstood. Borrowell—Here's that dollar you loaned me last week. Wigwag—What's the matter? Didn't you like it?— Philadelphia Record. K Delicate Point. ''lt seems to make Seaddinylon's wife as inad ns a hornet every time he lio.Tstn thut ho began at tli* foot and worked bis way up." "Well, be started !O A* U bootblack, you It uow." —Chicago Record Herald. CHELSEA'S NOTED BUNS. ill London tied to Visit Mrs. Hand* on Good Frldar. However religious observances may change In England, the eating cf hot cross buns on G-»d Friday Is not likely to die out. Still, enthusiasm In this particular has considerably declined Binee the days when Mrs. Hands kept the Chelsea Bun House at the corner of Jews' row, now Pimllco road. So many people were In the habit of flock ing there on Good Friday In order to eat hot cross buns that on one occasion 50,000 persons assembled there, and £250 was taken in the day for buns alone. After this the inhabitants of Chelsea protested against the noise and disturbance this caused, and Mrs. Hands, fearing to be restrained by the law, issued in 1703 a quaint proclama tion, stating how, "desirous, therefore, of testifying her regard and obedience to those laws by which she is happily protected, she is determined, though much to her loss, not to sell cross buns on that day to any person whatever, but Chelsea buns as usual." This Mrs. Hands was something of a character in her own way. The royal family and many of the aristocracy used to visit her in the morning, and Queen Charlotte even presented her with a silver half gallon mug contain ing 5 guineas. The house remained in the possession of her family for some time, as Sir Richard Phillips, writing a few years before Its destruction, men tions. After admitting that for upward of thirty years he had never passed the house without filling his pockets, he goes on to say, "These buns have af forded a competency and even wealth to four generations of the same family, and It is singular that their delicate flavor, lightness and richness have nev er been successfully imitated." When Ranelagh was closed, the Bun House declined in popularity, though as late as 1830 24,000 buns were sold on Good Friday alone.—London Chronicle. POWERFUL VOICES. tome Historic Shrlelcera Who Ante dated the Famons Stentor. The question has often been asked, "Who was the most loud voiced man of history?" The answer usually is that it was Stentor, of whom Homer says his voice was as loud as that of fifty other men combined and from which we get the phrase "stentorian voiced." But we have record of two historic "shriekers" anterior to Homer. We read where Simeon and Levi fought against the twelve men of the city of Sarton and that Levi beheaded one man with his own sword. In chapter 38, verse 41, of the book'referred to the story is related in the following words: "And the sons of Jacob seeing that they could not prevail over the twelve, Simeon gave a lond and tremendous shriek, and the eleven remaining men were stunned by the awful shriek." In chapter 39, same book, verse 19, we find the following account of the battles of the sons of Jacob with the inhabitants of the city of Gaash. It seems as though the battle was both In the front and in the rear and that the warriors on the wall were throwing spears and hurling stones upon the sons of Jacob. What next occurred, as related in chapter and verse above cited, is recorded in these words: "And Judab, seeing that the men of Gaash were getting too heavy for them, gave a piercing and tremendous shriek, and all the men cf Gaash were terrlfled at Judab's cry, and men fell from the wall at the sound of his pow erful shriek, and all those that were without as well as those within the city were greatly afraid of their lives." The Canary la a Little Pic. The canary is always regarded as a small eater, just as the pig Is notorious for its gluttony. People with small ap petites are often twitted for not eating more than enough to feed a canary, and this led a man who was a tiny eat er to watch the yellow bird and report He found that a canary that weighed 247 grains ate Just thirty-two times its own weight in a month; that Is, It ate rather more than its own weight on an average every day. Anyone who watch es the little bird will notice that it is al ways eating. Now, says the investiga tor, a pig doesn't eat its own weight ev ery day, glutton as it is. Hence he thinks that the canary deserves to be classed as a little pig.—London An swers. Ran Wlthont Leva. A certain congressman has a smart granddaughter, whose clever sayings are the delight of her parents. The oth er day she came to her grandfather with her face all smiles. "Grandpa," she said, "I saw some thing this morning running across the kitchen floor without any legs. What do think it was?" Mr. Congressman studied for awhile and gave up. "What was it?" he asked. "Water," said the youngßter trium phantly.—St Louis Post-Dispatch. Proceeding With Cantlon. "Are you sure that your arguments are calculated to impress people with your punctilious principles?" "I don't want to impress 'em too strongly with my punctiliousness," an swered Senator Sorghum. "If any body is willing to sell out, I don't want him to feel scared about making a proposition."—Washington Star. Jnat a War She Bad. Softleigh—That howid Miss Giggles weally laughed at me lawst evening, doncher know. Miss Cutting—Oh, well, you shouldn't notice. She often laughs at nothing.— Chicago News. Walls have ears, and the paper hang »r doesn't cover them either.—Philadel phia Bulletin. Knocked Into a Coclced Hat. 1 The expression "knocked into a cock ed hat" is familiar to every one, but perhaps its origin is not so generally known. Cocked hat was a variety of the game of bowls in which only three pins were used, set up at the angles of a triangle. When, in bowling tenpins, all were knocked down except the three at the corners, the set was said to be "knocked into a cocked hat," whence the popular expression for de priving anything of its main body, character or purpose. Chinese Repnrtee. An Knglisb sailor was watching a Chinaman who was placing a dish of rice by a grave. "When do you expect your friend to come out and eat that?" the sailor asked. "Same time as your frlen' come out to smellee flowers you fellow put," retorted Li. Singapore Free Press. Fereatsrht. Sweet Girl—l am loved by two men, nud I cannot make up my mind which to marry. What would you advise? Old Lady—Get liotb to insure their lives in your favor and then wait until one of them dies. That will insure the constancy of the other.—New York No 25