VOLXXXII Mid=Summer * CLEARANCE + S A L E. + Having placed our orders for Fall and V\ inter goods, we must make room for them. We therefore offer you the usual Mid-Sum mer prices always found in this store July and August. Capes, dress goods, silks, millinery and notions, shirt waists, wrappers and skirts at prices less than cost. We are also having a SPECIAL REMNANT SALE of woolens, silks, calico, ginghams, satines and lawns, muslins and linings. These remnants all marked down just one-half the original price—a rare chance to secure bargains. This mid-summer clearance sale at the popular and reliable store of Mrs. Jennie E. ZimmermaN. (> j, i » i, e l Lowry Successor to Ilitter & Ralstoe WIK DO YOU Think of This FOR JULY. Top Buggies Low as S4O 00 Top Slat Wagon Low as ss° 00 Two Horse Farm Wagor. $55 00 Phaeton S6O 00 Two Seat Spring Wagon S3B 00 Harness Oil Per Gal Axle Greese 4 Boxes • 25 Buggy Wheels, with steel tire SB.OO per set Harness Leather has advanced 50 per cent, but we had enough to last us a whole year, bought at the Old Price, and are making Harness accordingly. Therefore, anybody wanting harness, now is the time to buy to save $5 to $lO per set. No difference what you want about you team or wagon, come here. Also if you need a Trunk or Valise, we keep a full line. 8, B. MARTINCOORT & CO., 128 E. Jefferson St., Butler Pa. Sweeping Reduction in Hillinery Wire Frames at Straw Braid, Half Price. —Every Flower—Even the finest in the house at 13c Leghorn Hats at half price—Special prices in Siilors. All other Hats from 50c to $2 50, go at one Price 19c All our fancy ribbons go at Half price—The Dresdens and Stripes are just what you need to complete you wash dresses. Re member the first here get the choice things. M. F. & M. MARKS. 113 to 11? 8. Main St. W. F, Hartzell, Frank Kemper. The Adriance Rinder "%/VV i Is the lightest draft, the simplest constructed, the easiest operated, and the most durable of any binder on the market. It will not upset on the steepest hills, It will cut where all others fail. It will handle as long or as short grain as any other binder. It will do better work in tangled grain than any binder in use. This binder is sold on its merits. If it fails to do as above mentioned, we do not ask you to buy it. All machines and vehicles sold by us are guaranteed to be as represented. Machinery for all farm use, from the plow to the separator, can be got from us. Vehicles in various styles and prices. Harness for all kinds of use. Fly nets and Covers, Dusters, Robes, Blankets, Whips, &c. In short, anything belonging to a team outfit is kept by us. The best wagon on the market is sold by us. We guarantee it superior to any thing sold in tliis county. Call and see us HARTZELL & KEMPER, ««S. Main St., Bntltr, Pa. THE QUESTION is often asked, What Paint shall we use? THE ANSWER: If you are looking for covering capacity, wearing qualities, general appearance, and your money's worth, you must buy THE SHERWIN-WIUJAUS OtHn Hoit, Look! But, Wiart Longest, Most Economical, Full Measure. Our prices are for "best goods" first, last and al) the time. We are in the business to stay and w - p - stays with us.. COLORS IN OIL^I^ MOUSE & COACH ' VARNISH K», J. C. REDICK, iog N. Main St. THE BUTLER CITIZEN. It Is Not What We Say I But what Hood's Sarsaparilla docs, that tells the story. The great volume o;~ evi dence in the form of unpurchased, volun tary testimonials prove beyond doubt that Mood's Sar'a £ JL parilla Be Sure to Get Hood's Hood's Pills c*re habitual constipation. HEINEfiIAN & SON, 1 \ .SUMMEH J I - HOd ' J Fon 1 v way t ■ p cool i- J 1 u> j;o to f ' rt? Ileineinaiis fx D t K 0 Let \our-H' nice 0 ££ Hammock. Jj? 3 We i.avf tie iargt'.-t jjg 1 ffl \ i»[,d finest line < f i zj Hammocks jzj 'SJ ever brought to Kutier. J Wall Paper So \ i j ►—> t from 3- 5 ti :.Pf tof PrerSt-d J >-j is? PAPERS. Wo* 0 We also handle the J, _ d celebrated w g* RAMBLER |? j BICYCLE. * HEINEMAN & SON. GREAT SAMPLE SALE. J; ' | Sum i i i er Siloes, AT Half=Prices. Just received i ,000 pairs o' Summer Sample Slices and Slip pers. These goods are to be so', at once. I bought them at n own price and you can have the:: at yours. These samples wen not bought to make money on. but to keep things lively dunng the dull season. . Prices Good for 10 Days Only Ladies' Fine Tan Oxfords, fi and #1.25 kind $ 65 Ladies' Fine Dongola Oxfords, 75c kind $ 40 Ladies' Fine Cloth Slippers go at... 21 Ladies' Fine Tan Shoes, heel, #2 kind ...Ji 10 Ladies' Fine Tan Shoes, spring, >2 kind {■ l 10 Ladies' Fine Kid Button Shoes re duced to $ S-i Ladies' Fine Tan Shoes, $2 kind,... 1 25 Boys' and Youths' Fine Tan Shoes $2 kind #1 10 Misses and Children's Tan Shoes Space forbids me quoting fur ther,but if you will call during this Sample Sale you will see Summe) Shoes going cheaper than ever be fore. Don't delay but come at once and try * The New Shoe Store Durhig This SAMPLE SALE OF SUMMER SHOES. C. E. MILLER, 215 S. Main St., Butler, Pa Seanor & Nace's Livery, Feed and Sale Stable, Rear of Wick House Butler, Pa The best of horses and first eluss rigs always on band and for hire. Best accommodations in town for permanent boarding and transient trade. Special care guaranteed. Stable room for sixty-five hordes-. A good (doss of horses, both driv ' ers and draft horses always on band and for sale under a full guarantee; ••rid horses bought upon proper noti ! ficatiou bv SEANOR & NACE- All kinds ot live stock bought uud gold. Telephone at Wick House L. C- VV r iCK DFALKR 111 Hough and faked LumH OP ALj. KINDS Doors, Sash, Blinds, Mouldings Shingles and Lath Always In Stock. I IME. HAIR AND PLASTER. Office opposite P. A V. .li'l.V A FEMININE DEVICE. BY HATTTE lI'MMIS. j —>HAT Miss Delamore's yachting' party would 4j?'' fcv. prove a success was a foregone conclusion. gjV'mgm Miss Delamore was her self a success, and all her undertakings bore the imprint of her con vVJ quering personality. Those honored by her invitations were in the habit of accepting promptly, while those not so fortunate were prop erly envious and cast down. Accord ingly, when for this particular occa sion she received regrets, and those, too, from Kitty Crawford, on whom she had principally relied for the en tertainment of her guests. Miss De'ia more simply set her lips together with Napoleonic firmness and drove at once to Kitty's home to inquire into the matter. She found the young lady in the gar den, languidly occupying a hammock, and attired In a negiigee frown which the male observer would have thought enchanting, but which Miss Delamore was too absorbed to notice. "As for your not going, my dear," Bhe said, plunging into the conversa tion with her usual impetuosity, ' that'e all nonsense, you know. It's got to be arranged somehow. I've depended on having you sing, and, besides, the yacht is a perfect dream now that it has been refitted. What's the mattor, anyway, Kitty?" As she hurled this question at her friend she l>ent upon her a controlling gaze such as the hyp notist fixes on his prospective victim. But the other girl was as shrewd as She and as self-possessed. "Oh, I don't know, Lou," she answered, with a care lessness that was almost too elaborate. ''l'm rather used up, and, besides, the sea breeze burns one to a crisp, espe cially the nose. And, considering the tilt of mine, you know, I can't be too careful about giving it undue promi nence." ''What absurdity—from Kitty Craw ford!" thought Miss Delamore; but she only said: "Nonsense! Wear a veil. ym going to have the joliiest sort of a prowd, Kitty. I want you to meet Miss Huntington, of Baltimore; she's rsally distractingly pretty. And Mr. Jack Walford —let's see. Do you know him?" Miss Crawford, lowering her inscru table lids, admitted having met the gentleman in question at her uncle's Seaside residence. She neglected to add, however, that they had immedi ately and mutually fallen in love, a State of affairs culminating in an en gagement after six weeks' acquaint ance, and that just a month before this very morning they had quarreled irretrievably and parted forever. Nor did she mention that in breaking this brief engagement she had come as near to breaking her heart as a well conducted nineteenth century girl ever comes to so ill-advised a proceeding. Not being given to indiscriminate con fidences Kitty referred to none of these things, but their recollection may account for her saying, in a very languid voice, just as her friend rose to go: "Don't expect me to-morrow, Lou; but if the day is lovely, and I happen to feel just like it, I may come." Whereupon Miss Delamore, interpret ing the remark as an unconditional surrender, kissed her enthusiastically, and went away in triumph. But when Kitty came on board the yacht next morning there was not in her manner the faintest trace of list lessness or lauguor. In her blue yacht ing suit, with a jaunty sailor hat perched carefully on one side, she was the very embodiment of girlish anima tion. Iler advent was hailed with an enthusiasm universal, except in the case of one young man, who exclaimed, under his breath: "The devil! She "IT'S GOT TO BE AIiBANGED SOMEHOW." here?" and walked to the other side of the yacht to recover his composure. For Jack Walford was still young enough to believe that love is eternal, and, though he had no intention of making any unmanly fuss over the matter, he knew very well that his heart had l>een irremediably broken t>y the cruelty of this coquette in blue, now lavishing her dangerous smiles on all comers. Jack looked out over the calm water and thought of the evening just u month before, when he and she had walked together under the sighing branches of the pines and the sea breeze had ruffled the bewitching little Curls around her forehead. The poor boy choked to remember the trifle "light as air" which had been the causo of their quarrel, and vainly tried to console himself with the reflection that if Kitty had evei really loved him she'could not have made those savage speeches which had cut him to the heart! One recollection, however, gave Jack a melancholy comfort. When Miss Crawford had drawn from her finger the ring which he had placed there with so much love and pride a few short weeks before, Jack had re ceived the little token without a word, and, turning on his heel, had hurled it into the dancing waves. Then, with out a single backward glance, he had walked away, and by this course of Conduct Jack thoflght, perhaps not un reasonably, that he had properly sus tained the dignity of a much-injured man. And now, though he had been taken by surprise and compelled to beat a temporary retreat. Jack, who was grit to his linger ends, had no intention of surrendering without a blow. After fifteen minutes of reflection he found himself able to approach Kitty and greet her with a careless cordiality; j and then immediately devoted himself to making tlio acquaintance of Miss Huntington, who was almost as pretty j as her enthusiastic hostess had de- , clared. And so the moruing passed un eventfully, and fhe afternoon was well j advanced, when Miss Delamore called j upon Kitty to sing. Kitty responded with the readiness which was one of her charms. She brought her guitar from the cabin, took her seat conveniently near the 1 spot where Jack was carrying on a very fair imitation of a flirtation with Miss Huntinirton, and without preface or apology Iwgan one of the favorite ballads of the day. Kitty's voice was like herself, piquant and sweet and full of charming sur prises. She sang snatches of operas, rollicking college songs, and now and then on • of those tender, plaintive lit tle airs that compel neither smiles nor tears, but in some unaccountable way reach the heart. And her audience applauded hungrily and would not be satisfied till at last she said, with a l#: : f||r •/ J\ TIIHRE WAS A TREMCTOCSXESB IS HF.Ii VOICE. pretty air of determination: "This is positively the last." As she spoke she looked full at Jack, and for the first time that day their eyes met. She turned away her head and a beautiful color burned in lier cheeks as she struck a vibrating chord on the guitar. There was in her voice, too, a tremulousness which caught the atten tion of the listeners almost from the first word. We wandered ni tlie shadow of tUa piues, my love and L In spite of himself Jack writhed on his chair. The memories of one event ful night grew vivid at those words. Again he seemed to hear the weird music of the rustling piues, and the face of the linger grew misty before his blurring eyes. It would have been more delicate iu Kitty, the poor fellow reflected savagely, to select a song without such allusions. But like all else in this day of torture it must bo endured; and Jack brace 1 himself to listen. We wandered In the shadow of tho pines, my love and I, As the wind was blowing freshly from the sea; But a sudden, fitful darhnes« stole across the i summer sky, And a shadow came between my love and me. Some hasty words were spoken and then al most unawares Hasty answers to unthinking auser led, And our heart-sick, bitter longing, and our weeping, and our prayers Ne'er can make those false and cruel words | unsaid. The young man wipeil the drops of • perspiration from his forehead. lie ! was pale to the lips, and the girl from | Baltimore noticed it and asked hi,a confidentially if he were seasick. Jack did not answer. In fact he did not even hear. For now into Kitty's voice there had come a poignant note of longing and entreaty, and her guitar, as if responsive to her mood, sobbed out its rippling accompaniment: He took the ring I gave him, nor cast a glance at me. As he held tho jeweled trinket in his hand. And then he turned and tossed it in the waters of the sea, Where the wares were splashing idly on th« sand. He went his way unheeding tho hot tears I could not hido. He went his nay and not a word was said. But my stubborn heart was breaking under neath its mask of pride, And the pine trees sobbed in pity overhead. The words were crude, the melody simple; yet as the girl sang from her heart she somehow touched those di vinest of life's harmonies, which are the inspiration of all the arts. And more than one of the listeners found their eyes suspiciously moist, though perhaps they themselves would have been puzzled to tell why. I wake from i»! tor 'hramlns but to call aloud your name; I sleep again to dream of you once more. And my stubborn pride has left mc—l admit I was to blame; Forgive me. dear, and love me as before For the future Is o'crshadowed with the darkness of despair. In the sky of life love's sun no longer shines And I'd give the whole world gladly, once again to meet you there, Reunited In the shadow of tho pines. The song closed abruptly, and Kitty, leaving her seat somewhat hurriedly, turned her back upon her .-.till clamor ous audience. Jack followed, and as they stood in a sheltered nook together, his shoulder close pressed to hers, he saw that her delicate lips were quiver ing. "Kitty," said the young man, his voice thick with love's sublime intox ication, "can you ever forgive me?" She turned her brimming eyes upon him. "If 1 hadn't wanted forgiveness myself," she said, "I should never have written that song." Then with that indifference for ap pearances characteristic of great souls in moments of exaltation. Jack V issed her in the shadow of the sails, \n 1 as the relenting angel sheathed his flam ing sword, the lovers, ha»id in hand, reentered Paradise. Godey's Maga zine. Better Than itocks. Helen (pensively) —I'm afraid you'll find your idol is made of common clay. Etliel (cheerfully)—l hope so; for then I can mold him into a conjugal brick. —Judge. Knew the Nicest Method. Paterfamilias —What on earth makes that young man stay so long? Doe n't he know how to say good night? Edyth —Of course he does! That's what makes him stay so long.—Puek. An Honest Attempt. She (frigidly)—My father saw you go into a pawnbroker's shop. |[e—Well, you told me I would have to redeem my past, didn't you?— Truth. Too Delightful. "Isn't this perfectly delightful! she fsked, as they sat on the sofa with their arms intertwined and the brillian tine on his mustache not very far from the crimson balm on her lips. "Dorothy," he replied, "when I know that your mother is listenm - < n the stairs, that your father is waiting i:i the passage with a cane, that the bull dog is loose in the front yard and that your little brother is under the sofa, how can I say that it is delightful?"— London Tit-Bits. Not Too Ambitious. Mrs. Westside—Tommy, your pants are all worn out. Tommy—Yes, that comes from my j having to move down all the lime in my class, but it's all right now. lam ! at the font of the class. and I am goin | to stay there, so there wilt be no tr:• re | fear and tear on my pant -.s raping up and down on the bench. Texas Siftings. A Itadlrat Chance. First Employer—l hear you have ! yielded to the demand for eight In urs' work at ten hours' pay. How can you afford it? Second Employer—You see, my men I promised to work, while they are at • it, instead of standing around and I chattering about capital and labor. —N. Y. Weekly. Understood the lluse. Mr. Ennicott —There's a lot of steamer ; trunks piled out conspicuously in front of Mrs. Slimpoeket's lion: e waiting for \ the expressman. What docs that mean? Mrs. Ennicott (with scorn>—lt means that site's going down to her uncle's farm to spend the summer. —Chicago Record. I nalilon'* IVtmlticfi. Mr. Billus —Maria, how does it happen that Fanny isn't going to church with you this morning? Mrs.Billus —You know wwelltw I do, John, that when Bessie and Kato and I go to church somebody ha • got to stay at home. There isn't room for four pairs of sleeves in our pew.— Chicago Trihune. THE SUMMER PROSLEM. Where shall we go this summer* where sha'.l wr while away The brief and all too Lour —the sweet vacV.lon .>? In mountaiu 1... .1 or sc . ' . f-..a or hotel cay? Where shall we go this ftar.!:nor' • the prcV'ca of to-day Shallwegi .cn an c.. ;n ste-\.er and h.c to old Pare ■ ■ Or seek out Aunt Am . .da 'way up In frto hvree? Shall we go t ■ the ■ . . v Hey - the grand Yo-emltr- '• Or take a cot on a sandy lot hard by the sound in£ sGi' J Shall we go to the piny for >st an 1 fish for tho spec:.: l tro'.t. And hi., in '•» :i , th.t ail ' -w:t • ocean ten wiles o t. Or spend two months In a Teuton town and dine on sauerkraot? Shall we go to the Lake of Como? shall we .- hall we b-,-1; in i . . • ■of Nature, or whirl In Shall we put on oar linen dusters and go with ■ Through tii si.'Uy n.iaip-hire mount",lns and tho oid abandons 1 farms? Wo won't do a single o;ui of these—nay, nay! The very be * place lathe summer for my wife and children three Is hero In rav de ir suburban home on the J. j a & c.. Where m-co* we'll i.ve in comfort 3sd the bathtub's always free. —Harper's Uajar. ACCORDIX* TO lIOYLE. BY A. n. LEWIS. ■w JEJT ES," said the old cat «*. df tlel ,iaa ' a> lle mu ' a meditative clove, J "there ain't much paw and bellow, head g down-an'-tail-up busi- ! ***4f> ress to a cowboy. Speakin' general an' not allow in' fer them intlooences which disturbs none, he s : us passive as a fried lish. "About sixteen years ago, before I i • abides in Wolfville, 1 was ]»esterin : 'round Vegas with Bill Lockri Ige, who : was workin" a small bunch of ,-bar-k | cattle 'way over on the \ ermejo. We d i been slashin' 'round the Plaza all day. findin' fault with tho whisky ati i amoosin' ourselves at our own ex pense, an' along about five o clock in ! the evenin' Bill allows he -s some sick of secli revels, an' concloods he'll p: nt up among the dobys explorin of Ohl town a lot. So we all goes in concert. I wasn't frothin' at the mouth none to go myse'f, not seein' uo relaxation pokin' about permiscus among a passcl of Mexicans, an' me loathin' of 'em nacheral; but I goes, aimin" to sorter ride herd on Bill, which his dispisition is some free an' various an liable to mix him into trouble. Not that Bill is bad; none whatever, but bein' seven or eight drinks ahead of that Plaza whisky makes him feel gregar'ous and friendly; an' he's cap'ble of goin' about a-claimin' of acquaintance with peo ple he don't know at all, an' feelin' way hostile when the stra:»ger has symptoms of doubt. "So I goes along; Bill a-warblin* 'The Dyin' Ranger' in several keys. "The senoras and senoritas a-hearin' of the row would look out an' smile, an' Bill would wave his big hat an whoop from rapture. If he starts towards 'em, aimin' for a powwow— which he docs frequent, bein' a mighty amiable man that away—they gives a squawk immediate an* sliets the door. Well, Bill goes on then. Maybe he gives the door a kick or two, in formin' 'em of his di content, but that's all. All at once, while we're prowlin* up one of them spacious al leys a Mexican thinks is a street, we comes upon a I-talian with an organ which he is grindin'. This yere organ ain't so bad an" I've heerd a heap worse strains. As soon as Bill sees him he tries to figger on a dance, but no one 11 dance with him. " 'ln which event,' says Lockridge, 'I plays a lone hand.' "So Bill puts up a small dance, like a 2vava]o, accompanin' of himse'f with /X s w- • . ' L'J - £"~K-V , BILL SHOOTS. whoops. But the da,7o can't play Bill's music, so the ball comes to a halt. "'Whatever is the matter with this yere tune box, anyhow? ■ Bill, '(limine the musij for :t {.recn corn dance, an* don't ma • no «• frivolous,' an' I figjrers this ou liter improve 'em.' "When Bill shoots tho I-talian nran heaves the strap as holds him to tho organ over his head an' flies. Bill ketches the music box, kecpin' it from fallin' an' after awhile begins turniu' the crank to try it. It plays all right, only ever' now and then there's a hole into the melody like it had lost a tooth! " 'This yere's good enough for a dog,' say • Bill, a-twistin" away on tiie organ. 'Where's Merino? Whatever is the matter with him'.' Why ui ln't he stand his hand?' "Hut Merino ain't here no more, so i Bill allow it's a ha •to lot it KO that way, an' Mexicans suff vin' far music, i So he strap <>ll th - tun-'-box and goes round from one "doby to another a-turnin' of it loo: e "'How long did this yere Merino turnout his 'une .' . . Hill, 'before he collects? Ilo.v vr, I makes new ' rools for the 'rime n ht yere. 1 plays i these eadenei s for live minutes anil ! then I gits ikction on 'em for live. I splits even with these Mexicans, which is shorely fair.' "So l.ill twists away for five minutes i an'me a-timiu'of him, an' then leans the hewgag up agin' a Moby an' starts to collcctin'. He'il go up to some household a-whirlin' his jfun like a ; pinwlieel, and at the mere sight of him the members gets that generous they even attempts to negotiate loana ( ~Nd give 'eui to Bill, they're »!•«» «•"»- towerist.i, wh > was -r tra i.su" 'round an* lookln' at tl." ;. a*id they comes up an' listens awhile- rhey waa tur~ ! t" to go away je b. . re e- ee - in' t;me. " 'Hold on,' -ay. Bill, p: kin' up his Colt often the top of the organ. Tre* seed j eop! • turn that Jaek in church, but you bet you c...i'l j ; .11 r. > ramc o! mine tli .t way. > j t you all lii.j up agin* the waU until 1 tucks the blank ets in on this yere at --ak in I'-flat I workin on, an' I'll • with you.' "So v, 1. I>:11 winds up he goea along the Una oi t r ■ mfatin' tower- Ists an'c Uects el , e " 'They was r. ruin' t.>.v. . :th all theui nocturnes an' ; ;_ios. an* arias, an' not t.;y n-.'.iiln',' s-_3 1.11, - ' KsX riOl 5/": .--M 'L r. us J j - ; •. f.{ j 11 r s V : til -¥\ i f'A ! .14 1 1 - hs "HOI.D ON." CAYS FILL. | 'but tliey can came no twit like that Rn' me a ridiu' herd. Xoao what ever;* "Bill carries ou this away fur three hours; and what on alit - an" what on bets ha win, lie's over a hundred dol lars ah ml. But a. la h tired, an' | allows he'll quit anil call it a day. So | he lugs the old tom-tom down to I Franklin's office. Franklin i= marshal, ! tn' Ilill turns over tl; <:.. ,n an' the j money, an' tells Franklin lo hunt up I Merino an' give hir the 1. ootin* match. " 'Where is this yere dago?'' says Franklin. "'However do I ki v ■ ays BilJ. 'Last I •> him he- a- r-'n' up the calle li'ce a jack" r.i'.'iit.' "Just then Meriu > c«... > in view feelin' in; - per. ive an 1 fe.-"i'ul ui>ont that bullet in hi.- ; ' r.t w'uen he gets Bill's doir .;>>n hi- feelln's e.>m m»nces to r'.-e a lot 111 fe. t, ho be gins to regard i' 1 ' me. " 'But yo i'll l: •v e > r •: :.l up t . t':ws V • -as is gettin* a heap t •r- r- ■ i :.a. " 'lt's gettin' . : a free American citLs 1 ' > en courageimnt. 1! 1 it 1! If a day ama sin' w !:li ! 1 a is sittin' in l-:td b: :'i' v, I'.Mexi cans who sli'.-; , • ; ;r)' yere I am laj'ed for by ; I iike a felon.' "W ell, we all r to iteele's. Franklin an' I I '.e, tha alcalde, goes ]: k' • what ever crini' s Bin", * . ,v. They gits by the t .. -.* ' r,.;an, an shootin'into it ' ' • i.mdin' np the t -ri . ;v • 'i 1:• ne, but the >/.: ; sticks 'cm. "'l'm shorely sorry to say It, Bill,* savs St•• !„•. 'but • <-i ■ , a-bu tin' of a ord" ;mee . ; .' music on the street® with mt no li " 'Can't you beat the -line 110 way?' says Bill. "'I shorely don't s?e how,* says Steele. " 'Mi tai iblen,' . Fr ii'. iu, " 4 Whatever i i: • m ;.. t with trek in' them tunes >n t-'r :• :i >'s license?' says Bill. •' "Can't do it iio'i ,v,' Steele. 44 'Well, is this ; ere 01- i'nance ac cord; 11' to Hoyle an* the !claration ot independence?' says Bill. 'I don't stand It none onless.' 14 'Shore,' says Steele. 44 4 Turn your enrds, then,' says Bill; 'l'm a law-abldin' citizen an' all I wants is a square deal f. .1 t ie warm deck.' "So they fin > Bill iU'ty oollars for playin* an or on the streets with out licence, and lie pay it an' goes r.way pea< ful " —Chic > Times-Her ald. _ —Da Vinci read Pindar and thought him the noblest poet who ever wrote in any language. i' i>;c to oblige. "E.scuso me, sir," said the man in the row behind, "but would you mind asking your wif • to remove her hat? I assure you that I • annot see a tiling on the stage." "I'd like to o' ' ..' - yon, sir, but it is impossible," said the man addressed. "We live out of town and we must get home to-night." "What has that got to do with it?" "What has that got to do with it? Why, our train >es twenty minutes after tl. • end « " p rfor; ' ee, and it takes her an hour to put that hat on." —Harper's Ba.-ai - . I or llu • mlty'fS S ike. Young Man : tfully -I a;u g'iag to cross t';n Atlci.tio in thist-venty-foot boat, wit 1 1 .i »n ! :4 this €*l>CllMl OJI Circumstance*. Bass And of which variety is your wife, tho elin ring-vine or the self-as sertive? ('as V little of both. When she wants a new dre ,nr;i new bonnet she ) generally begin, in th • cliu ring-vino role; if that doesn't bring the money then she changes to the self;, sertivc; nnd well—she invariably gets the dress or the bonnet. —Boston Tran script. V.'hy Hi' Loved Ills rather. "Which do you love most, your papa or your mamma?" Little Charlie—l love papa most. Charlie's Mother —Why, Charlie, I am surprised at you; I th -ught }'•».» loved me most. Charlie—Can't help it, mamma; we ' men have to li Id together.—Jewish 1 Times and Observer. WltJi Trnra 111 Iler Eje». Sho wa • thrown on tho world. "Mer> iful heaven!" she gasped. Considerable turf w as knocked off the world where she struck it. Before anybody could reach her slio ' had risen and was swiftly leading her bicycle away.—Town Topics. No I.onjtcr a ('rime. Tourist (in €)kkihoma! -Horses arc pretty cheap here nowadays, aren't ■ they? Alkali Ike—Cheap? They are so j blamed cheap that when «e capture a: horse-thief we send him to the lunatic asylum insti aii of 1> 11; ; in him. —Puck. -V Horn Dolfrtive. Little Johnny I knotv what the j baby is goiu'to be v.'en he grows up. j He's goin' to be a d, te -tiv •. Mother—Of all think r sl ltes.uso he's' so smart'.' Little Johnny No'm. Because he j never sleeps.—2V. V. W'eeklv. SULLIVAN'S SEC SET. Hon- Ilf Coal.! r.ll WhrUer It ITn* a Uoy or a Ctrl. When J. - .. L. iiuliivaa v.";: l iu Wash ington sib >UT -a ym' *-y> J:c aroused a crowd of I t. .. rs who happened to be of a variety intellectually superior to the arc rape crowd of teogftrt-en who worship tl:v great man's memory for what he was. with an exhibition o£ at tainments in which.act oriling to John's idea. I raiu ia.,u .id of brawn and i'stlc prowess play., tho I *tU r part. He told the a r 'e <>i anj man in the crowd who was learned enough to add, suV. , tract and di\ ide a cries of ' .'-mound fi ;;:rcj, wh:j . Joan fur !, and rine tiroes in which ho I Vved with the fervor of an idolater. say.s the Washington Post, goes in'. >t Qjarveloti*. It involved the tellir.;;' wh -Iher the flrstbort» of a given csonplo wa a boy or p. girt. The way tl.at this feat .... ; miplished wa ?a j 1 .;v . pugilist, the mot ■ to t.. writ- .*. To so.ve the problem the only neces sary i : • i len name of the x-; other an i the full name of the father. Ac - -rdinr to Mr. Sullivan's formula, if. ;: r coon! ia|f thaletters in 1 1 t. 1 ;c q even one odd iiine Brown and UJram Smith form a total of twenty three. an t"d rui her. Result, a girl. If th:, for: . ,i!a is reliable it will serve for. nj pur; as well as the estal ';.. at of p;-st-faoto results; but hoc. - i'i.d guaranty goes with the pre scription. FOUGHT FOR THE HAIR. A It. r ; is Cmiiirorr Stjnil l"p for I Ilrldnal K'.jthts. "X .w you have cut my hair," said the horn • oi:ntryman to the barber, "kindly eol'e-.: the hair from the floor, wrap it lip in amper and hand it to n "I -!i lido no such thief," the bar b • replii-o 'rnily. "That hair belongs to me. I cut it off. didn't I? That makes it mine." IV- ei -tomor got excited, says the New Vork World. '"l)on't you know," lie exclaimed hot ly, '"that under the common law of the land anything that growg upon my head is as much mine as arc the con ten iof the i: ad? In every copyright ease it has V . ?n settled that the prod uct of a man's brain is his. Ton't you know that?" Now was the barber's turn to get mad. "If hair is the product of your brain," he shout I. "I guess it's about all it doe.s pre!;-. What do yon want the b. uied hi. .• for? I don't need it my self, but I'm fighting for a principle, and I'd spend my last cent to do you out of that hair." "None of your business what I want it for," howl 1 the countryman. "Per haps I need i: to stuff pillows with, and perhaps I am a wholesale manufac turer of wigs. That's none of your business. I'll admit that I don't need the hair. What then? I'm fighting for principle, too. Gimme my hair." They shook their fists in each other's faces. It took a policeman to separate them. Such are the ills of life. For these trifles do men wildly battle. Somolhlng Kcw In Win J mill*. The old-time windmill—that tower ing- i. '"ton of rib . and fans with whi. h we are familiar— has recently been i: iroved in a fashion _ that promi > much 1 t results— an in cre: 1 rate of p wer and much greater ease of man:: geraent. Instead of fans cr artas turning over and over, whcel fashi.n, ■ eotiditii us are reversed, the . xl >r y.tndicular. and the fans turniiar .. i side to : ide. This arrangement h :•» a Ivan"ages, in that the i: linerj mi be made stronger, and by an i: ;...ly eontriv .1 but of levers the funs open and close auto mat!. y. TV :of gieat importance, MB sir ie:i !.• is liable to wreck an ordinary ' in I oa short notice. With ti s now <: -e, it is claimed that no mat r!; ' l yidly the fans may re volve, they v. ill . h the wind only at the pro rt • . t .■ ct r side opening to give re< ; to the air; thus the hi" 'r ti. ■ ; • I . ter the rate of hp- a 1 (' l ir. effective the m . ! t i . i aid that in windy cor.. ,eh p *r can he gener al i to ran a small dynamo. The {•; ' . ' f 1 iudi:.ill is hi coun tries v.! 1a 1 pumping of w cr is iu i'y for purposes of irri gation. A windmill e»i: 'i acted on this new prin iple costs no more than ie old style, is Litlnitely more effect ive, li i I'ab'e to f tout of order, and hi; : re r var! ' «.t uses than any heretofore made. Vrrj Clc»M tiirl. A J ig i an with a pretty little voice, I ,t with iw great possibilities in her:' ,gi: h h 1 out a course for lier -elf which i.- so decidedly shrewd that it may well be w -th noting. She devotes her -If entirVy to Scotch in. . UMit of ' hem the old ones of Burns or Scoit. No. , every listener, i .Tcept the vt t musical critic whom she could i: he ye to satisfy in any case, is : im ntal and likes to have that s- iu.ent eat.Ti lto by means of the ear. The :.i 'e has taste and wit enough t'i e: -hew "Annie Laurie" and "Comin' Thro' the Bye." save "by re quest,''when her compliance gives an added charm of kindline ■. She hunts up sweet old tunes and pathetic words and after the most brilliant perform ance of lier rivals she seats herself at the piano, and, like the heroine in the | lackadaisical novel, she charms her audience by "running lier fingers over the keys" and singing softly "some dear old song" or other. Ah, that is a very clever girl! Crest* aud Crusmlcg. It was during thecru: des that crest# were introduced iu England. Richard j L adopted thrta- lions passant—that is, passing or going by, which are still emblazoned on the royal shield of England. Bright Ilijr. I) I > you understand girls? ! V.'cll, 1 k::ow enough to kiss ;; . , i r vl mustn't. —Puck. Laro'n llcfraln. Dear, I love yoa la the i.. rnluß I j V.'hra 1 i-ec fou tr !i and bright: Lovo you laore at sunr.;,- uoonlKlr. Love you in ;t. ia>'lore, at aitftit, TThen youre; .rev lln slumber, Dreaming of ilio happy past. And your lips arc • .1. I with atlcnco And your is lie 1 at last. ~S. Y Worl'L .TOKr.R II Vl> HIS I.ITTI.IC JOKE. ifi />( aN '4 ''| 1 •< -r . ' \ ! ' Tip ' , Mr. Suth of the !' ■ . •uffering m rc t th :r state from it* ravages. It attacks all stored cereal products, but corn and wheat are the principal grains affected. It is 4 ' in c ■ itrr.l Illinois and >s is incurred each a I -.el: t! informa 's . " " / S'- 'i x if'i^ J; j -X;-, -i- h THE OHAI.V J. <:• t c r-.'erning iis ha: . : , ne . s for its instruction. ; f als lnie«.w .11 corn d by a little olv « vatiou. 1 ' u! three weeks be f"~e the u • ;il . ,-e A). It thett i ...» a 1 ;pa (see B), from v. *: ■■■ full insect emerges al r. The creature passes the wV o y in your barns and store -1:-. It iil . • 1 uninterruptedly, ge:: raiii.n after ; -aeration, in stored wheat. After harvest the moth flies out from the granaries to the wheat fie'. 1 :.n i 1::;. s its e upon grains of wheat iu the shoe'.:. The larva) are II . dr '.:- yed by thrashing and are carried back iat l y ir granaries again. It is jila'n r.ni til facts that if the gr..- Aries .. e kept free from this pest the .. ks will >t become infested in the flel ! . If the individual farmer, how t '.e trouble to disinfect - . w'leat sh ks will be in: - el f - im 111 t:r. flying from the 1 s f h ■ 11 hbo . provided he d noi tu -ish very soon aft.r harvest ■r l>ef ire the eggs hatch and the larvse 1 '.<■ th* gr::in. I know there is :n .- or le.. dill ! "iilty in getting a th:- 1: . ■ proper time and where the 'e.eat 1 the left in the tields the f 1.• -i disinfect iiis granary soon after the wheat is put in. i ais in t sis several natural ene -1 1 ave recently bred several * i of very small winged parasites from it. No doubt these natural a .. . k"-.-;i it in cheek to a certain ex teai. but the most efli.-ient remedy known for its arrest and dcstruc ti- . ihe use of a very disagreeable -ai 'i: ag li']ui 1 known as bisulphide of earl' in. Its application is very sim ple. i'r if. W. (•. Johnson, in Western Rural. AGRICULTURAL NOTES. 1 : culture is now extending to Africa. T arking the seed will protect the corn from crows. ••••. varieties of potatoes are hollow hearted on rich soil. TIIK practice of washing sheep be fore shearing is fast dying out. A clean hor--e ia always happy, and it ' i s less fee 1 to keep him in condi tion. A canning factory is about to be es t n-d at Honolulu, the first in Ha waii. The English claim that TO percent. . the American sheep imported are diseased. 1 . .li:: s.vess and its twin brother, lie* . . re the worst enemies of the poul try; . Ne v Zit aland exported in IS9-J 635,- 800 pounds of butteraud -43,4>'X) pounds of cheese. The East India rice crop is reported at li.' *i,loo acres this year, against 15,:;tn».400 last .year. '1 sealer grow Hj of the potato ■ 1 iter .-ha le they make, and tli.s he, Ue soil cool and moist, and beuetieial to the crop. 'i ::e is 11 horsemcat war in I'aris. The t irk butchers are demanding the lain lling of sausages in which this meat has been used, and it is probable that a law on this subject will soon be p:i ed. The importance of the indus try c: 1 be realized from the fact that inl . t. ),OL'O 1: irses were slaughtered in 1 s, three-fourths of which went into : a usages.—N. V. World. Why I'armor* should Keep Hooks* P. . a :-, do not have that knowledge of their affairs that they should, as :• "f them kce > 110 bo ks. When the e. ; us is being taken they can give but very little information in regard to th-- number of bushels of grain •i :: each y ear, or the value of their live -it; Ik :ice much must be derived ft e mates rather than from facts Every farmer should keep LOOV and set down all the items of receipts and expenses. Our I'urlor Soldiery. Shi -Is Mr. Dudley much of a mili tary man? He -Well, 1 sh« mid say he i! e c 1 a | ut on a fresh uniform every morning, with two changes dur ing the day.—Detroit Free Press. Conclusive Proof. \ t ~ 1 !.t you my photograph. Don't yon think it is a good likeness? Married Daughter—Well, I should i; i It i 1 lifelike that when my ].;• .1 aw it he turned as pale as a ghost.—Texas Sittings. Qrorfo Was All Her Mother—l abhor kissing. The idea of placing your lips to the lips of a I maul He: elf liut I don't, mamma. Oeorga's mustache always prevents it. | —Brooklyn Life. - Another Widow Joke. t r Well, doctor, I had a peculiar ease to day. . 1 ..•! r-What was it, please? i;. 1t.,, tor—l attended a grass v. i l - . irkolasffltM with hay fever. —Oakland Times. An Inducement. • .a • already had four wives!" • ■' ■ not alive, dearest."— | Life. Iu Tbear I>n_>•• k "Wiiat is a fad?" "One's i»et sin."—Puck.