f m i j/JP .v.. ' /- y A- / r - '* f ... THE BUTLER CITIZEN. VOL. XXX. Special to the Trade. GRAND BARGAIN SALE.#- This sale is a grand clearance sale. I will soon start East and be fore going I wish to reduce my stock, so I have gone through all goods and have placed on sale a large lot of Men's, La dies', Boy's, Misses' and Children's Shoes and Oxfords to fit and suit all and at extremely low prices. Bargain seekers should not let this grand op portunity pass by a? these are greater bargains than ever before offered. Full stock of Gent's fine Russia Calf Shoes, lace or Bluchcr style, at $2.75 to $4.00. Full stock of La dies' Russia Calf Bluchers, emmon sense or piccadilly style, at $2.00 to $3.50, all styles and widths. Our stock of Ladies'and Misses' Oxfords is larger than ever before, prices 75c to $2.50. Men's Black Oxfords at SI.OO. Men's Tan Oxf'irds at $1.25. Men's Southern Tics at $1.50. Full >c~. of Men's Dongola and Wine Color Creole shoes at $1.50. Men's Fatent Leather Shoes at $3.50. Men's Patent Leather Pomps at $1.25. Our stock of Men's Fine Shoes is large and prices very low. M n's Calf Shoes $1.50, any style. Men's Kangaroo shoes $2.50; h.vi'l ->< vv-i Cord' vans $4. J±JSr> MANY OTHER BARGAINS. At all times a full stock of our own make box-toe boots and shoes. BOOTS AND SHOES MADE TO ORDER. REPAIRING NEATLY DONE, Orders by mail will receive prompt attention. When in need of anything in my line give me a call. JOHN BICKfCL. 128 SOUTH MAIN STREET. BUTLER. PENN'A ARE ARE YOU "WW YOU ALIVE AWARE TO YOUR THAT SHREWD OWN INTEREST? ~?fBUYERS OF CLOTH DO YOU REFLECT "Vs&l&n, ' ING INSIST UPON HAV THAT YOU SHOULD ttt ING THE GARMENTS OF HAVE THE LATEST AND ft THE MANUFACTURER BEST THAT THE MAN- I WHERE STYLES AND MERIT UFACTURE PRODUCES? I ARE CLEARLY STAMPED? We do not force upon you the production of inferior makers which differ as "Skim Milk does from Cream." We handle the best at lowest possible prices. DOUTHETT & RA H AM, New Clothing House, Cor. Main and Cunningham Sts., Butler, Pa. This is a perfect picture of our new Furniture and Housefiirnishiiur Goods house. One of the largest and most complete stores of the kind in Western Pennsylvania. FURNITURE: We have all kinds, Parlor Suites, Bedroom 1 Suites, Hall Racks, Dish and Book Cases, Side Boards, Dining Tables, Chairs, Baby Buggies, Refrigerators, &c, &c. QUEENS WARE: j Decorated Dinner Sets, Tea Sets, Plain 1 White Dinner Sets, Decorated and Plain ' White Toilet Sets from $4.50 to SIO.OO. \ Ask to see our Toilet Set at ss.oo,cheapest j and best in the world. Lamps, &c. HOUSEFURNISIIINU GOODS: ! Cook Stoves and Ranges, Tinware, Wood en Ware, ike. Don't fail to see our new range the "Perfect,"one of the best cook ( stoves and ranges on the market for tne money. Every stove warranted. Campbell & Tempieton, ■ LEWIS M. Kinrrxra, L£ Bouth Har'.xick, it. Y. ■ BOILS, CARBUNCLES" A \D S * TORTURING ECZEMA, m Completely Cured! || ■■DANA 8A?.- WAKILLA O » , 3 L Cent- —i « ... ar*-> <lh4d ,4 Lnfiplppr" ; E^whi' , h mo»t h-.. iiuituncd suy si I-• ■TU P nit "Nhincli / af-H ■- 1 1 ■ tirijti -r* 'tton. It k a.tr?e=== I of Qr. i maHrinw btf they irfl ir-c not to work. 1 l zJft. <] vrthi—'. ■IX I I-/ |»oIU v hid mx an 1 tuo fur*m _ hanrlen u! «#n«* (imp. 1 tr. -i *vry.' log Hi ! gj?r I rouid h**r of but«• nt.i.ued to have botls. f—= ■TU AT I "rran • nrv 1 tOTUv -U*d : uigUt and day, thePP wei interiM*. I hid poitia in r ,7hf |B*«j< «jj(J .. k, coaii iiial hi'iiduchc. IMB IP! IPPQ »m '!■ uaf-d At vt I* VJ nCO hwdi.r DANA S SAiIgAPA-r 1 HUiLL.v, corumeottd un:>v it, ar-d t», (idrdl S bottle completely < I ttKIl r» . S I S \our» rr«p*rtfu!ly. rn LKWIM M EDMUNDS. ■ 3 fcmih lUrtwirk, N. Y. mm The trulii c t t LI above it citified to hj ■ ii. K. ffOLBKOOK, P. M. ■ bvuili Hartwick, N. Y. =1 B Dana Sarsaparilla Co., Belfast, Main*. N| feed. For prices aod terms. Ad drees, J. W. MILLER, 131 Mtrccr St., Butler' Pa. SPRING STYLES RE A DY. -.A YOU WILL CERTAINLY HAVE A SUIT ADE TO ATTEND THE WORLD'S FAIR. YOU CAN AF FORD IT, WHEN YOU SEE THE SPLEN DID ASSORT ENT OF ATERIAL, AND THE MOD EKATE PRICE A'l YOU A SUIT THAT IS CORRECT TO THE LATEST DECKEL OF FASH ION. Aland's, Tailoring Establishment. C. & D. ALWAYS Take int'i consideration that. money saved in 11K iih money tamci. Tbe Mt. wu) to rav nionoy h ;o buy (rood ..i the ' priet; The only r>-uhmi thai our trade !h inerfuhiriir e-diHtitiitiv the fuel that we bundle onlj of <|tiality and hi-11 thrin at rcrv l<>\v prieen We hitve taken unu u>;l cire to proviite cv Tvihiu/ n* i.i llutH and Poruibhinfr (ioodw • ibi« and ur we hive eontrl <\ mnDy et-peeUlly (food triie!> i Jiotii I'neti W« cijfi fi yu if Colli'- to Uft. VVe eonfidi-iii!v that in j'. tii:<- to'heniri'lv(.- uii jiuii buaerH -hould innjiect «.iii gooii.4 Vi. it uh, COLBERT & DALE, 242 S Vi iin liuMcr, 'a, N OIT [<•!<;! YTT j Tl" WRI.Ii- W Apt 7 £T n ■ ■ f| I I it craplicr; 'ormcrly XX \J X ViJ ■ 1 in- In ,i<t i>l tlio ' Wcrlz It aril in a n Art (!<>., will open a Stadia and Photo I'ar lors oppiiiiilo tlio IIot«;l I>nwry, Cor, Main and JcfferHon Bt*., liatlor, l'a Thin will Im the host li((!iti!(l and equipped Studio anil gallorlrn in tho thu county. The work will lie Htrietly lirnt clan and t;i 1 under new f'ormulm tiy the artint liiin i 11, who lian had ir> year practical experience in lartfo cltie* Portrait* in Oil, Crayon, Sepia, I'anttd, <tc. In thin line we have no competition, Our portrait* are made by hand in our own Htndio, from fitting* or from photo -. Our work ha* reached the bit;bent standard of r;;cellenco and in not to bo compared v. ith the cheap ma chine made picture* furni lied by other*. Wiiit for u*; got your picture* from u* and be happy. L. & McJIJNKIN, lusiirann- anil Heal I-. U-'l 17 EaST JtKrKBSOM .-;T. DUTLEK, - I'vV. * Tk*w%r* THE FBIBBIES' FOURTH. IJY It. L. KETCHtTM. Mr. Frisbie set down his cup with a satisfied sigh, and, leaning- back in his chair, smiled blandly at Mrs. Fris bie, who beamed at him from behind the coffee pot. Then he took a sweep ing glance around the board at the lit tle Frisbies, who, for the moment* were not making any noise. Mr. Frisbie cleared his throat im pressively. "My dear," said he, "I have a little plan." And he smiled broadly and rubbed his hands together. '"Yes?" said Mrs. F., interrogatively. "To-morrow will be the Fourth," went on the head of the house, ponder ously, "and I have a plan to propose for spending the day. This beating of armns and screaming of fifes, this I I'" 3 *? and confusion I L V. and sound of aNeged /..~4ißt music are all very painful to me, and I have stood it as «PPlHlK»Ff2ilK> rnan y times aj> I pro ; V | pose to. The Fourth - j'> °' a farce, farce —not in Ifcfcoewv. its sentiment, un 'Vbk fourth 13 a derstand me not rxnoc, madam." a t a ]i. No one is more patriotic than I. l>Jt it has been turned into a day devoted to noise and turmoil and conrusion, which is wrong and we ought to discountenance, by good example, the present way of cele <u mim -mr national holiday. My dear, let's all go down into the coun try, away from all this racket, »nd have a quiet, jolly little time all by ourselves. I know just the place to go. 9ne of our customers, who lives at a little cross-roads about twenty miles out, lias invited us to come and spend the day with him. What do you Nay?" Of course Mrs. Frisbie and the chil dren were delighted, and it was im mediately decided that Papa Frisbie was a iirick to think of this plan. There was not much time in which to get ready. Mr. Frisbie thought no preparations were necessary beyond the purchase of the fireworks that he conceded to be indispensable to a proper celebration of the Fourth, but, Of coarse, Mrs. Frisbie, woman-like, thought of a thousand things that had to be < jflr attended to, and, all ■d&Xjfc that long day, while l'apa Frisbie was run- 'r;. ning around Uut city ]P4cjf laying in fireworks CjfSgaa*'- and things. Mamma jsjrffiß ' baked and cooked and Mf 1 ; mixed and stirred, getting things ready sL— for the picnic that was mil r i.cccino deemed necessary to this tihewohks, the success of the expedition. Papa Frisbie came home late for dinner, tired and footsore, and very cross. Mamma Frisbie was almost exhausted and in a condition bordering on hyster ics, and Mamie, who had been obliged to help her mother in the kitchen, was in a very disagreeable rnood, and snapped at the younger Frisbies, who were never very good, and who, now, in the excess of their exuberance, were positively fiendish. At a late hour that night, Mamma Frisbie decided that all the necessary preparations were made, and fell into bed with a sigh of relief— but not to sloe p. She was too tired to sleep; be sides, some of the little Frisbies, who slept in adjoining rooms, were very -*<4 wakeful, and per- J|H JL slsted, in spite of protests, in carry- Al W) K" n h hrlll voiced /I'll eonversations about Brf/llif || 'll~ the coming treat. ■ Moreover, Mamma I 4 '( ffl' \ Frisbie was one of —I I / those nervous peo |j * I fc- pio who are afraid H I. f —' rr- tj lH alarm clock MH. r . OKTS UP to SKK ~ _ . tiik tims won t gooff at the right time, and who think it their duty to lie awake and wait for the clock to show that it is still to be depended on. Finally, about the time the small hours were beginning to think of get ting larger, she fell asleep, only to be awakened in about five minutes by Mr. Frisbie, who had gotten up to see what time, it was. "James, do come back to bed and keep quiet, can't you?" James came back to bed and <juiet feigned for a time. Then, about an hour before the alarm clock was due to ditclare itself, the boom of cannons and the sputter of firecrackers an nounced the glorious Fourth, und the Frisbie family arose because they could (lo nothing else None of them awoke particularly good-natured, and the t/vay the little Frisbies acted about get- Title Kins noLixui pounds, galloped to uxtku oij ahead to secure tickets, while mamma and Mamie and the cook toiled along with the bankets and hampers and cuffed and herded the band of young Frisbies, who were Inclined to loiter, despite their eagerness to get lUTTLER, PA.,FRIDAY, JUNE 30, 1893. They arrived at the little cross-road station safely, much to Mamma Frisbie's relief. There was no convey ance waiting to take them to the farm, so they had to wait about the station until it arrived. This interval was improved by the small Frisbies to good advantage, so that by the time the big wagon arrived Willie had smeared his nice new eight dollar suit wifch axle grease, Freddie had hurt his finger fooling around with a coupling-pin, and Alec created some excitement by falling afoul of a big yellow dog, who resented the young man's attentions, and showed his re sentment by tak- ~ lng a mouthful of leg and trousers — mostly trousers, fortunately; dogs are partial to ¥9Jw pants. landed at the alec and the yellow farmhouse, in fair- doo. ly ood condition, and Papa and Mamma Frisbie thought their troubles were over, but this is where they made a mistake. Mr. F. had hardly got ten settled, to smoke a restful cigar with his host, and his better half to indulge in a little talk with the hostess, when theie was a wild scream from the barnyard, whither some of the youngsters had lluvvji im mediately upon their arrival. There was a rush to the rescue on the part of all hands. Small Janet had had the temerity, urged and abetted by her brothers, to make faces, at " U,~, close range, at a lordl y turkey gob bier, and now, with CJfo, braids flying and <Vjtf&v -f/reyes starting from '•-'■f* * her- head, was tlee ing from the bird's **■ wrath, her short, fat legs making but ££&t— indifferent time, wuo BAir, "ooßßßr.r- wh „ B Afr (jo bbler was gainiag upon her at every step, looking fierce enough to frighten even an older person than five-year old Janet. Janet was rescued and her parents went back to the house to rest and en joy themselves, and bad gotten com fortably seated when another scream brought them to their feet. This time It came from the mill pond, close by, and the way Papa Frisbio made time in that direction was well worth see ing. It was Mamie, this lime. Mamie wan nix toon, an<l felt herself <piit« a young lady. Mr IlilliugM, the host, had a younger brother who worked in IHH ittore, and thia callow youth imme diately fell a victim to the charms of the elder daughter of tlie houne of Frinbie.who proud ly took poMleHHlon of him. Together they wandered down to the pond to take a row, and then arid there did Mamie proceed to step backward off the landing Into MAVII IA KM A BATH to soak her thor outfhly, new hat, new dr«-HN and all. Before dinner-time came, Alee ha<l another accident. Thin time he fell out of the hayloft and nprained hi» wrUt, thereby succeeding in placing to IIIH credit another nenxation. Willie was hutted hy a frolic Rome hull-calf, Juat hefore the bell rnntf for dinner, but thi» affair \vo« pf Nuiall moment, at> kin appetite exceeded IIIH desire for aympathy. When, after much bustle ami con fusion, they were all (with the excep tion of Mamie, who was hiding her mortification and drying her clothes), bundled into the wagons, with the prospect of a day outdoors and supper In the woods, over by the creek, where l'apa Frlsbie proposed to fli.li, there was another diversion. Clouds began to gather, and it was quite apparent that it was go ing to rain. It did rain, too, and tlyy all got pretty wet, * and by the time it . "y, II stopped raining, ~ir ' ' ami their clothes were dry, it was too jL*IBSHBPBu late to tliiri 1c of a ground hadn't iieen 'I lien Freddie and A CAI.r STKIKKH OTTT Willie sneaked out WIM.II to play in the mud with the results usual in a case of that kind, plus a spunking administered by their lon(f --sufferlng mother. Hut the pyrotechnics made the howl ing success of the day. If there was anything- l'apa Frlsbio prided himself on, it was ids ability to handle fire works. lie did very well at first, and the au dience on tlie veranda eaeored witli vigor his feats with a long Itortian can dle and a couple of rockets. Then he tackled a pin-wheel, a big fellow that seemed inclined to run things for itself; tur, before Mr. Frisbie gave it the word,and just as soon as he touched a match to it it kicked out behind, jumped around in the air and fell back Into the bijf bo* of fireworks. Hero wan a deiuoiiftlratlon! It <lid not laku .Mr. i'riflKo luuu to decide c that h1 8 P res " ence was no longer re . quired, anil he sad to re across the cro- THF. tsu ' que t ground, and struck at 'least one wicket. At any rate, be hit the ground quite hard, and there he lay and howled for help, while Roman candles shot liirn, and roekets kicked him, and every other devilish invention in that box came forth and smote him hip and thigh. At two o'clook a. m., July 5, as Mrs. Frisbio, having put the children to bed, with hands endeavored i to alleviate the bufferings of her lord and master, that person expressed his sentiments In regard to the way some people spend the Fourth. I '"Mph!" he said, in a tone of deep disgust. "Just like a woman. Weren't satisfied, of course, to stay decently in town, but bad to go chasing off into the blooming country. Catch me in dulging any more of your crazy freaks!" Mrs. Frisbie, who is a meek little woman, didn't say a word. A .luT«.fillr KdlMon. Mrs. Wayback -That weather-vane that peddler sold you ain't worth shucks. It don't point toward the wind at all. It points just the other Mr. Wayback—lsy Jinlcs, that's sot Th' wind is from the south, and that tin rooster points north, sure as guns. Little Son- I'll tell you how to fix it, pop. Take it down, and cut it into the shape of a cow. Cows always turn tail to the wind.—Good News. A Connldrratc (Jurat. Old Party—Thank you, Antoine— thank you very much. Ah—do they allow tipping here? Antoine Oui, m'sier. Old I'arty—And are the guests lib eral? Antoine—Non, m'sier, ze rule is zo ozzaire way. Old Party—Very well, Antoine, here is a cent for you. 1 do not wish to break the rules. -Harper's Weekly. Not Iter fault. "Is Miss Moralngside l'ark married yet?" asked a New York gentleman, who has just returned afteran absence of several years. "No, but she could have married one of the richest men in New York, if lie had only been willing," was the reply of Ilostetter McGinn is, to whom the question was addressed.—Texas Sift ings. i:i|H<rlmtlit Dorct. "You see that young couple in front of us? Well, they're just married." "How do you know?" "Ueeiiuse lie treads so carelessly on the skirt of lior dress." "lint that is no sign." "Oh, yes, it is. He'll be much more careful as soon as he finds out what her dri-sses cost."- Fliege»nde Itlaet ter. "I'OKTRAIT OF A I.AIIVJ Excellent likeness of the woman who docs not talk about other women. —Detroit Free I'ross. Ilia Chiimrlrr. Lady—So your husband is in jail again? Poor Woman—Yes, ma'am. "He does not seem to be a man of very stable character." "Well, I don't know as to that, mum. He's a hostler."-—N. Y. Weekly. Court Ktli|iiett«*. Nettby I suppose you know what the bull said to the tennis player, don't you? Oonrtby No, I can't say I do. What Wtt« it? Nettby—l'm on to your little racket, my boy.—Town Top ice. Not ICvrii 111. Itlr*»ll>ar. "tic's iiu awful miser. I never heard of him giving uuything away in his life." "Didn't he give his daughter away when she was married?" "His daughter eloped."—Hoston Globe. l.nrrjr'* l.aniant. "Wurral Wurra!" groaned Larry. ' Dad luck to the day I was bor-r-n! Here's thiiu bank* all l>ui.tin' up an' me not got a ciut in anuy wan av 'em." —•Chicago Tribune. Vturlliv «.r ftripirtl. I've rra<l th" poet* of the day With all my main anrt ralnht, Inil for tny I ivoi'llc I chouuo The onn who does not write. , —Judge. juht cuoiitfh water land. Is often re* (\' i 3\ ferred to as the Cy prototype of our declaration of independence. 1 Fourth of Julv orators draw much of their inspiration from this old spring of English constitutional liberty. It will be in keeping' with the traditions of Independence day to visit the place made memorable as the spot where the great English bill of rights was wrested from King John by the bold and liberty-loving barons. Rofore visiting Runnymede, let us take a look at the neighboring castle of King John and a glimpse of the surrounding coun try. The valley of the Thames boasts of but one tall, overhanging cliff, apd rising from this lofty plateau (twenty three miles west of London) the noble gray walls, pinnacles, battlements and towers of Windsor make up the most sightly object in the whole landscape of England. The castle rises from the ■wooded cliff, like a vision of enchant ment. Its immense range and pic turesque outline drawn against the sky recall youth's delightful pictures of fairyland. There is a mile of castel lated wall between the old black cur few tower at our right and the palace at our left constituting the state apartments. Standing on the roof of the great central round tower of the old gray Keep of Edward Plantagenet, the crowning edifice of the castle, ajid with the scenes around us where poor, mad George 111., deserted by his chil dren, wandered aimlessly about with wild eyes and long white beard, be wildered and crazed, and knowing noth ing except that he was utterly misera ble, I asked myself if American Fourth of July- orators did not let their patriotism run away with them when hurling fiercest Jnvcctives against the King Lear of the eighteenth century. In this country, however, command ing the prospect, we see little but landscape; in Europe we see history. One looked through a vista of a thou sand years in the view from Windsor castle- On the north t»ide, flowing be low the castle cliff, is the historio Thames. On its opposite bank, Eton and its famous schools. Yonder ia Slough, where, with field glass, you may see the home of the elder Hershel. There is the many-gabled roof of Ilainpden, whose hero defied a king and precipitated the English revolution. Yonder distant spire anil grove mark the scenes of the sweetest elegiac poem in the language and the grave of the poet—Stoke I'ogis. The home park of the castle is a sylvan pleasure ground of five hundred acres, ornamented before the queen's apartments with fountains, parterres of flowers and statuary. The great park beyond is fourteen miles in cir cumference, and continuous to that lit Windsor forest, having a circuit of fifty miles. Hut I can hardly restrain my impatience to be off, as the gov •raor of the tower dlrcoL, LUJ a distant spot seen over the edge of ♦h\ fo. ..*t am 1 . "Runny mede!" I walked through Windsor forest to Runnymede. I scanned the famous meadows with my glass from the tower, but I wanted to stand upon the ground and kick up its very dust around me. It is said that a Yankee views everything with un eyo to specu lation. I believed I could prepare a better Fourth of July speech after standing on the spot where Magna Charta was wrested by hi* barons from the unwilling hands of King John. Walking three and one-half miles through a park and forest direct ly away from the river at Windsor, I Htruck its hanks again and was not slow to conceive the origin of the town's name in this great bow of the winding Thames, or wind shore. I Joined here, too, the high road, which soon turned abruptly away from the river, and to follow the stream I crossed over a stile in a hedge and was at once upon the soil of Runny mede, a very level meadow spreading back half a inile to the Surrey hills and uxtending a couple of miles along the river side. Walking half its length, I stood opposite Magna Charta inland. no called to mark the contigu ous spot on the main land where the conference took place between John and his angry barons. Here the lords aud their retainers would rendezvous and send word over to the castle that they were ready for business, and it was business that ad mitted of no delay, when King John was sent for that day in June, Auno Domini, I'JIC. On the mead around me were pitched the gay pavilions. Chargers, richly caparisoned, carrying mailed knights, were prancing about, or idly feeding upon the meadow grass, or fringing the river side at drink. Here stood the bold leaders in confer ence, awaiting their king, their glit tering armor telling of earnest pur pose; here the fierce debate ran on for days, and here the trcmlding monarch was made to sign the great charter re storing the liberties usurped by the crown, including the independence of the church, the permanence of the courts of justice, the freedom of com merce, the writ yf habeas corpus, in a word, the supremacy of English law over the English throne. 1 looked about me for a relic, but not for long. Taking up a handful of earth, "Why," I said to myself, "this very dust may have sanded Magna Charta"' It was at least a part of Runnymede, and I brought It away. (i. W. VAN HOR.VE. 'I rylng (hn I iu|>oa»ll>l«'. "Yes, Mr. Robbins made a failure. IJo tried to do two things at once." "How's that?" "lie tried to love a woman and be married to her at the same time."— Brooklyn Life. Ho !!m<! Kept I lonic llefore. Mrs. Talk (looking over the new house) —What In the world is this vast attic for? Mr. Talk—lt Is to hold the things that you buy and can't use.— Ronton (Jlobc. Hcrlptiyrml* "Why Is It that when a woman loses her husband sho becomes MJ attractive to men?" "It is the old, old story of the widow's might."—Judge. II; th«< Wink. Mario—You can tell a drinking man by his eye. Justine—Yes, If ho Is at a soda water fountain in a drug store. —IJrooklyn Life- When Wnmm (jrt Their flights. "So Marigold has applied for a divorce from his wtfel On what poNdi ble ground?" "Oh, he accuses her of failure to t»up- j port liiin."—Town Topics. Well Meant, Hut— "He conceals his Ignorance well, doesn't he?" said llarkins. "Yes, but not half ns well as you do," Mid the flatterer, —Truth. MR HICKS' ORATION. BY TOM P. "lOKC.AN. Mr. Ishaju <«. Hicks accepted with becoming modesty an invitation to de liver the fourth of .July oration at Kickvhassett Corners. He composed his address with infinite pains, and practiced Ids gestures assiduously be- ' fore the mirror. "The successful orator." he bragged ; to his wife, "must thrill his audience with the : pontaneity of his eloquence and the sublimity of his conceptions. And that is exactly what I propose doing. I hare alwayi held that the office should seek the man. but if the ides of next November should find me the people's choice, why—er ah!—l" "I suppose so," assented Mrs. Ilicks. Mr. Ilicks was at ivickyhassett Cor ners betimes on Independence day, and repaired in due season to Splog's ! 1 grove, where the celebration was held. Mrs. Hicks, owing' to indisposition, did not accompany hUn to the Corners. Just before taking- his place on the speaker's stand the orator was intro duced to Mr. Splogr, the owner of the grove, who informed hita that while ! i granting the use of the grove for a eel- I i ebration. he reserved the right to shut | off an offending orators wind at any ; time. He was not hypercritical, btrt ® llii. I BOMKTHDIO DROPPER. he opposed seditions utterances with all his might. After the usual preliminaries were gone through with, Mr. Hicks advanced npon the rostrum and began: "Ladies and gentlemen, I am but a humble ton of soil—er—er —l mean, a soiled son of —" "A humble son of toil," promptly cor rected Mr. Splog, who sat directly in front of the speaker°t**tand. "Thank you!" returned Mr. Ilicks. "A humble son of toil, and my lan guage is plain, and-uh—" "For ways that are dark and tricks that,are vain," prompted Mr. Splog, as the orator hesitated. "Not at all," answered Mr. Hicks, a trifle nettled. "My language is plain and unadorned with the flowers of rhetoric. Hut, standing, as it were—" "On the summit of Mount Pisgah," said Splog, cheerily. This was maddeidng; but Mr. Hicks restrained himself heroically. "Standing, as it were, in the shallow of the four hundredth year-post in the life of America, let us pause to note the fruition of these years. Hut four hundred years ago Christopher Columbus —" "And other wild animals roamed—" prompted Splog, mechanically. "No! no!" The orator began to per spire freely. "Christopher Columbus crossed the Atlautlc's trackless waste and landed on—" "This rook-bound coast." "No, sir!" Mr. Hicks' collar began to vllt. "That's so, by George! " Hock-bound coast goes with the Pilgrim Fathers." The critic did not interrupt ugain for some time. Mr. Hicks advuueed in peace from the discovery to the found ing of the nation and proceeded thus: "The glorious tjiip of state has weathered the storms of adversity and suiled triumphantly into the snug har bor of universal prosperity. Of the undying tenets laid down by the im mortal Washington not one tot or jlttle —er —er—jit or tottlc —that is, tit or jottle—urn! um!"— "Jot or tittle," corrected Mr. Splog. "Thank you! Thank you! Not one jot or tittle have passed away. And now—" A few minutes before, the balloon, contrary to all precedent, hail really gone up, and at this moment a bag of sand, thoughtfully dropped by the aeronaut, struck the orator squarely on the head, knocking him seuseless. A surgeon presently resuscitated the un fortunate man, but he did not feel able to resume his speech. "I reckon it's just as well," comment ed Mr. Splog to a friend. "lie never said auything about the continental con gress or the land of the free, or the boy who now stands before us. He didn't even mention that the spot where we now stand was once u howling wilder ness. I've had the pleasure of listen ing to over forty Fourth of July ora tions, and I reckon I know what's what. This one was no good!" \ I'KKCOC'IOI M I.AI>. «%■> /V 4**%. & i —i'--II- ) —r ri — !W mil \ w Little Eddie Tooley, a messenger boy only twelve year» of age, delivers a Fourth of July oration.—Harper's liazar. (luod r»r l'olly. "My parrot is a patriotic bird," aaid Brekkus. "As to how?" asked Barlow. "On the Fourth of July she always says 'Polly wants a flrecraakur.' " It Mak«a > DlfTerenr«. "Bogga must have a poor memory. lie has been owing me five dollars for a year." "On the contrary, I think he has a good memory. I owe him five dollars, and he asks mo for it every time he sees ma." —Life. Hard to NIIIMII. Lady (in crinoline) Is this elevator safe? Elevator Hoy- l'retty safe, ma'am. It dropped down one day las' week, an' smashed tip a woman, but her hoop skirt was saved.- Good News. A If urmotilona Kffirl. Mrs. Withcrbv"—That chair you are sitting on is a genuine antique. Miss Elderby Then perhaps I had better not sit on it. Mrs. Wlthcrby Oh, don't get up. It is very becoming to you.—Vogue. Hlie Was Urged. Mrs. Cawker (severely)— Daughter, dlil you not accept a kiss from Mr. Dolluy last night? Miss Cawker (hesitatingly) Yes, mamma, but it was pressed upon me. —Truth. Aflsr the Hlio»«r. Marmadukc- May I go out to play now? Mamma—What, with those holes In your lxKits? Murniadukc —No, with tho bulldog next door.—WMO, MO 31. BjBERTTB^I P AT the: % World'S L~AII\, ||| /A 1 !f(t RAND old bell ,I' I ' f ty y thy earlier mis, ' j J 1 siou but to votoe « I on Sabbstk As an angel's'll tigers pressed thee. As an angel's wings caressed thee— Softly cliiming from the steeple: "Rest ye, rest ye, O my people!" In me'.!ifluotis tones and.tender with an under tone of warning- Changed thy tone, as all men know. On that morning long ago. When thy stern majestic ring B—<-!-■ defiance to the king. Iu tlie streets are gathered thousands waiting for the message grand- Shall declare tliem Independent, freemen In a freemen's land. That shall by a single motion Send deSance o'er the ocean. Signal ships are outward pointed, Signal ships that homeward run. Thai a prince by priest anointed la but man when all is done. Brave men bro;ithles.s stand below thee, pale ot cheek but stern of brow. Praying for the proclamation— moments aie as hours now. See! the hand uplifted wavers, F^lls—the bellman straining there, Sends the song In rhythmic quavers Out upou the danciug air "They hare signed it, O my people:" Cries the bell from out the steeple. "Independence' Independence! Liberty!" the people shout, Sending up so grand a chorus that they drowa the old bell out. But that old bell's proclamation Swiftly everywhere It ran And demanded of each nation , Equal rights for every man. How the spirit of Columbia into every heart has grown Best la told by yon White City—symbolizing all that's good. East and west are come together—there la neither pole nor rone. There Is neither slave nor monarch, but where late the willow stood Stands the wonder of the ages. Stroke the old bell's rusty side. Right has triumphed and before her cower tyranny and pride. CIIJIHI.ES ECUEXK BANKS. A FOCRTH OF JCI.Y TKAiiKDY. / "She not only spurns me love, but rides with me hated rival before me very eyes!'" "But I am revenged, ha, ha! I am revenged!"— Harper's Weekly. Two Kinds or Crackers. It is no great woadT lhat people, old and young, make mistakes whon th<> same word stands for so many dif ferent things. It was the Fourth of July. A little miss was told to take her afternoon nap, and then she should get tip and watch tho boys put off their tire crackers. Pretty soon a heavy thunder shower came on, and Aunt Mary went up to see If Miss llachel was frightened. Evidently she she called out at once: "Aunt Mary, I don't want to hear any more water-crackers."—ltabyland. A Natural Decrease. They had nine children, and the worst Went out to celebrate; And when they heard the cannon bunt They knew they had but eight —Judge "RAIMINU TIIK VERY OI.D HOV." V afw yr ~l_' ' *" _ —Life. Nhc lloiiglit Nome. "I suppose I shall have to buy some firecrackers for Freddy," said 'Mrs. Bloobumper, as she entered the fire works store. "Let me recommend our new noise less variety," replied tho clerk. "Just the thing for nervous parents to buy for their children."—Brooklyn Life. Duller Favorable Clreuiustancea. Mrs. llrotvn—That poor woman waa broken-hearted over the lossof her only son, who was blown up while firing off his cannon. She said shu hoped he was in Heaven. Mrs. Malaprop—l guess he is, uiy dear. He got a good start.—Judgw They Dl,l llotli. "Let's break the silence," suggested one patriotic boy to another on the morning of the glorious Fourth. "We can cracker, anyhow," replied the other.—Detroit Free I'ros*. ADNKNCK or MIND. ■feSSsv ]\\y . i-r They passed Just at the crossing's brink. Said she: "We must turn back. I think." She eyes the mud. He sees her shrink. Yet does not falter. But recollects with fatal tact That cloak u|*m his nrni—ln fact. Resolves to do the courtly act Of good Sir Walter. Why is It that she makes no sound. Staring aghast as on the ground lie ,a> • the . lonU with bow profound? li'-r utterance chokes her. Hhc stands a-, )x trifled, until, Ilt r voloc regained, In accents chill She gasps: "I'll thank you </ yos will I'ick i</< my cloak, tlr!" —Oliver llerford, In Harper a Magailo*
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers