VOL. XXVIII
PROFESSIONAL CARD?.
JOSEPH W. MILLER, M. D.
Physician ; d Surgeon,
Office and residt nt* ; • «J. Main St. Botler,
Pa.
Dr. N. M. HOOVER,
137 K. ntttze hours, 19 to 12 M. H-Dd
lIO3P. M.
L. M. REINSEL, M. D ,
rimCUM AM> SCBGBON.
< >(Uce ami residence at 12T E. Cunningham at,
L. BLACK,
FIIYBICIAX AND BCBUKON,
New Troutman Bonding, Butler, Pa.
E. N. LKaKK. M. U. J. E. MANN. M. D.
■Specialties: Specialties:
OynaTology and Sur- Eye, Ear, Nose and
gtry. Throat.
DRS. LEAKE & MANN,
Butler, Pa.
G M. ZIMMERMAN,
ruvucua AND hckuioh.
Office at No. *3. S. Main street, over Frank *
Wi In UK Store. Butler, Pa,
SAMUEL M. BIPPUS.
Physician and Surgeon.
/Co. 22 East Jefferson St., Butler, Pa.
W. R. TITZEL.
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON.
8. W. Corner Main and North SU., Butler, ra.
V. McALPINE,
Dentist,
la now permanently located at ISO South Main
Street- Butler, ra.. in rooms formerly ;ccouplod
by Dr. Waldroo.
J. J. DONALDSON, Dentist
Butler, Penn'a.
Artindal Teeth Inserted cn the Intent im
proved plan. Gold Killing a specialty. Offlce
ovtr Kehaul'a Clothiug Store.
DR. S. A. JOHNSTON.
DENTIST, - - BUTLER, PA.
All work pertaining to the profession; execut
<dKi^c'iaItlea^lold'^l11 inp, and PalnleaiKx
tractlon of Teeth. Vitalized Air administered.
umc* Jcffcraea Street, doer Eaat ifUwn
lleaM, l> Stalni.
Office open dally, except Wednesdays an*
Thursdays. Communications by mall reeelve
prompt utteution,
K. B. -The oaly Dentist In Butler aslng Ue
best autkee or teeth.
C. F. L. McQUISTION,
ENGUEES AID SURVEYOR,
Omcl KIAI Dl AMOJTD. BCTLXB, TA.
H. Q. WALKER,
Attor «•< y -fcl-I »w—Cfflte in Diamond Block
Butler. P;t.
J. M. PAINTER,
Attoiney-at-Law.
Office— Between Pc«U»fflce and Diamond. But
ter. ra.
A. T. SCOTT,
ATTOHNKY-AT-LAW.
Office at No. *, Souili Diamond, Butler. Pa.
A. M. CHRISTLEY,
ATIOItNEY AT LAW.
Office seconrt fioor, Anderson Bl k. Malu St.,
near t'ouit House, Butler, ra.
. __
J. W- HUTCHISON,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
Office oi? tu rond floor of the Uuaelton block.
Diamond, Butler, Pa.. Boom No. t.
JAMES N. MOORE,
ATTO»**T-AT-LAW AMD NOTA*t PUMIJC.
Offlce In Boom No. 1. second floor ot Uuaelton
Block, entrance on Diamond.
IRA McJUNKIN.
Attorney at Law, Ofllce at No. IT, Eaat Jeller
son St.. Butler. Pa..
W. C. FINDLEY,
Attorney at law and Btal Estate Ageut. Of
flee rear of L. Z. Mltcheira offlce on north aide
ol Diamond. Butler, Pi.
H. H. GOUCHER.
Atlorney-at-Uw. Offlce on second floor of
Andenon building, near Court llouae, BuUer,
Pa.
J. K. BRITTAIN.
Att'y at Law-Office at 8. K. Cor. Main St, and
Diamond, Butler, Pa.
NEWTON BLACK.
Att'y at Law— South aide of Diamond
Butler. Pa.
L, & McJUNKLN,
Insurance and Real Estate Ag't
17 EAST JEFFKBSON.ST.
BUTLER, - PA.
iiurmil GOI'NTY
Mutual Fire Insurance Co.
Office Cor. Main & Cunningham Bt*.
a. 0. ROESSINO, I'BKSIDINX.
H. C. HKINKMAN, SMJKKT^bt.
DIRECTORS:
O. C. It'iessln*, Henderson Oliver,
. J. L Purvis, .lamed Stepliensoi ,
A. Trnittman, H. O. Helneman,
Alfred Wick. N. WelUel.
Dr. W. Trvln, Iw. Rlckenbach,
J. W. Ilurkliart, ,D. T. Noma.
LIYAI. S. M'JUNKIN, Agent.
SXJTJLtTirR, PA.
>
A. E.« GABLE,
V" eterinary Surgeon.
Graduate of the Ontario Veterinary
College. Toronto, Canada.
I>r, Gable treats all diseases or the
domesticated animals, and m*kt>s
riddling, castration and horse den
tistry a specialty. Castration per
formed wi'hout clams, and all other
surgical operations performed in the
most Kientific manner.
Calls to toy part of the country
Ofilce and InGrmary in Crawford's
Livery, 132 West Jefferson Street,
Butler, Pa.
THE-BUTLER CITIZEN.
LOOK AT YOUR SHOES!
DON T YOU NEED A NEW PAIR?
JOHN BICKEL,
HAS JUST WHAT YOU WANT.
If yon are in Dted of Bhoes or slippers of any kiod, no matter wb»"
style you may want, call aroaod and see us aud we will suit and please
you. We haye now on band a large line of ladies Oxford ties, opera toe or
common sense slippers, any material desired, all sizes and bave theni iu
widtbs Bto E. A large and complete line.
Gents low cut sboea, Lawn Tennis t-boes aud Wigwam flippers at a
bargain. Four styles of men's Patent L< atber shoes at $3 per pair We
have at present an extraordinary large st' <:k of men's, hovV aud voutb s
fine calf and kangaroo shoes wbich we are going to close out before visiting
the eastern markets to make my tall purchases. If you are in m.ed of any
shoes visit our store and get a bargain
We have still on hand 200 pairs chi'dreus tin color slippers, regular
price 65 cents now on sale at 25 cents per pair
Many styles of plow shoes, brogaus and all grades ol working rboes
ranging in price from 85c. to $1.59 We bave slill a large stork of tbe
"Eureka" shoe at $1 25 which seems to be everybodys favorit**. Call and
get a pair and get a shoe that will wear and give entire satisfaction 125
pair Qossamcr calf shoes regular price $2 25, at $1 75, sizes fi to 9^
LADIES SHOES.
We con new show a better aod finer selection of ladies and mifS«s fine
shoes than ever before. Ladies front lace shoes, opera or common 9ense
style, patent leather trimming or plain trimming. Button t-hoes of all kinds,
dongola kid, cursa kid, French kid. glove kid top, cloth top, ooze calf top
all, styles—all grades—all prices.
We want joor money and we are going to pive yt u more than value
for it, for we ueed tbe money and not the goods. Call and get u bargain of
a lifetime in this grand sacrifice sale.
Now is your time to buy. Grand bargains in seasonable goods and
from the immense assortment which we carry you can never fail to rind
what you want in footwear and what will suit you. Au immense business
enables us to name tbe very lowest prices for reliable goods
Boots and Shoes Made to Older
Repairing Deatly and promptly done either in leather or rubber goods
At all times a full stock of oilmens box-toed boots end shoes.
At all times a full stock of
Leather and Findings.
When in need of anything in our line give me a call.
Orders by mail will receive eame attention as if brought in person.
Yours truly,
JOHN BICKEL.
]STiimber» 128 S. Main Street,
BUTLER, - -- -- -- -- PENN'A
mjwrz. r
IH U 8 E L TON'S
l\lll\l/ill Wliv shouldn't it? The people
jlAlj llM) quite as naturally drift to the store
i flii wv'f JhVAi Iflv IN i tha ' beßt serve their interests as
if Vll HI wau ' r "■ ,WB down hill.
lla \l i'i 'he grrat shoe retailing
\I i 1 \ IvH Iw li y headquarters of Butler low prices and
VfrFlHO J dependable t-oods iro band in glove.
' V>.' * i Vsf\ ~i
" Sumetin'es more than full value.
Ladies our priceswlll open your eyes as well as your purses.
Below are a few prices:
Ladies kid button boots, handsome styles, only $1; ladies genuine don
gola button boots, handsome styles, only sl-25; ladies genuine dongola but
ton boots, very fine, only $1.50; 1-dies genuine dongola button boots, the
finest you ever ?aw, only $2; ladies bright dongol i, hand turned shoes, a
very fine and comfortable shoe that holds its own with any $3.50, here at
only $2.75 We have ladies fine dongola tops, calf, patent leather, vamp
hand turns, only $3 75. Ladies lace Oxford Southern ties and Opera slip
pers, for wbich we are justly celebrated fir having the largest stock, best
styles and best of all the lowest prices, has and is selling large quantities of
these shoes
Oar line in men's, boy's and youth's shoes is grand—not equaled in
Butler. We have from a gtod plow shoe or Lrogan at $1 up to the finest
band sewed sboes in all widths and shapes.
Gentlemen step In and try on some of the sho«s we offer in Con
gress at sl, $1.25 and $1.50; B calf dress shoes, no seums, full quarter, plain
or tipped, solid leather insoles and counters It yon want finer lock at o: r
calf shoe at $2; calf Kangaroo, soft as a glove at $2.50; a better end finer
ones at $3 75; the finest English Cordovan, band made at $5.75, all widtbs;
don't forget our $3 line, they are beauties. Men's fine patent leather shoes,
bycicle shoes, base ball shoes.
Infants shoes at 25c., 50c. and 75c Misses fine shoes, heel or spring
at sl, extra Gne at $1.25, $1.50, $1.75 and $2, sizes 11 to 2; children's 5 to
8 at 50c to $1; youth's shoes, button or lace, strong and durabie al $1 $1.25
and $1.50, 11 to 2; boy's button, lace or Congress at sl, $1.25,51.50 and $2,
plain or tipped, solid to the core. Lawn Teunis shoes at 50c a pair.
Mail orders for above shoes filled promptly aud carefully.
B. C. UUSELTON, 102 N Main St., Butler
OUR---
"NEW FINISH"
KID BUTTON SHOES!
---IN---
Opera and Common Sense, is a shoe
that can scarcely be distinguished from
the genuine French Kid article and is
very durable, splendid fitting and most
elegant appearing. It has a very flexi
ble sole, making it extremely easy and
comfortable to the foot. VVe sell it for
--$2.25.--
It has eclipsed any line we ever offered
in point of popularity. All sizes in stock.
Mail Orders Filled Promptly
AL. RUFF,
114 South Main Street. Hutler, Pa'
MY NAMESAKE.
Hail Raphael seen a lace
Like this I inly trace-
Full browed and sweet, with llly-iustrous skin.
Fond, rosy Hps and dainty, dimpled chin.
And large and soulful eyes,
Gazing In soft surprise
At all they saw In this strange world of
ours—
So fair a elierub then
He straight had limned, that men
Ha>l said: "This passes art;
Earth hath no counterpart;
The master ha-: communion with angelic pow
ers."
A glory, all too bright
To shine on mortal sight.
Save through the veil of matter, gildeth earth;
fn uncreated glory it h*»th birth,
And cometh us to cheer,
Saying: "Beyond, not here.
3 pilgrim soul, thy native country lies."
It glowoth near and far,
n dew drop and in star,
But in a beauteous child.
By sin still undeflled.
More purely than In aught beneath the kindly
skies.
Why doubt that God is love
When daily from above
These little messengers to earth descend.
To tell us He who made us is our Friend?
And when brief is their stay.
Why count it wrong that they,
Like rested bird.-, again should take to flight?
Their mission done, 'tis time
They sought a gladder clime;
Others their presence need.
And so away they speed.
To do God'a bldc.ng in the realms of endless
light.
Proud was 1 of the boy;
My heart leaped up for joy,
When first I scanned his goodly face aad
frame.
To think that one like hun should bear my
name.
The prophecy he seemed
Of all my youth had dreamed.
Destined a nobler manhood to attain,
And win those heights at length
That mocked my feebler strength.
Ah me! Ere he could wis
The meaning of my kiss.
He vanished from my sight; and all had been
In vain.
All vain? Did be not live?
O Lord, my plaint forgive,
I would not raze his Image from n.y heart,
Though grief and I might now forever part.
I've held him to my breast;
His tender check I've pressed;
I have embraced him in my inmost soul;
And that will ever be
A pleasing thought to me—
A dear, restoring thought.
With healing virtue fraught.
And Heavenly power to guide, admonish and
control.
All vain? Does he not live?
Yea, gracious Lord, forgive
My momentary plaint. He still Is mine.
And ever will be, since he still Is Thine.
In faith I lift mine eyea,
Andlo: In Paradise,
Lapped in perennial June, I see the boy.
Forms radiantly fair
Move round about him there;
And as a mellow haze
Infolds him from my gaze.
Through all my being flows a calm, dissolving
Joy.
—Charles Follen Lee, in N. Y. Independent.
A PLEBE AT WEST POINT.
Ho Furnishes Amusement for the
Older Cadets.
Learning the First Position or a Soldier-
Entertaining Inquiries Which He
Had to Answer to Their
Satisfaction.
8 THE annual
examinations at
the United
States military
academy have
just been con
l eluded thou
boys arid others
throughout the
country arc
deeply Interest-
in the sub-
I'oint. There is,
perhaps.not one
in ten of the in
" —' cogit at e d at
some time or another or who is not
now cogitating whether he would be an
ornament to the army and could not
distinguish himself as an Indian fighter.
Perhaps lie would like to know some
thing of the way boys are received at
the academy.
In the year 187-1, in the early summer,
I received ail appointment to a cadet
ship at West l'oint through the kind
ness (or unkindness) of Hon. John 0.
Schumalccr, then a congressman, and
new a prominent lawyer. I thought
it was a kindness then. After I
had been a week at West Point I be
pan to realize that it was a deeply
planned scheme on the part of my
father to lessen his responsibilities and
to have me killed.
With my credentials in my grip and
with a light heart I boarded a Hudson
river train and started on my. career as
a soldier. Everybody must have real
ized the fact that I was a born warrior
as I passed through the street on my
way to the station. My shoulders were
thrown back, my chest was thrown
forward, my chin was depressed, and I
kept perfect step to the martial airs
produced by the organ grinders on the
route.
The only thing that detracted from
the suggestiveness of a soldier was my
hat, which was of the kind known as
"plug." That plug hat cost me many
a weary thought after I arrived at the
point.
At (iarrison's I took boat across the
river to the government resurvation.
It was just in the early evening, and as
I landed a gun boomed out its greetiug.
I wondered if they treated every new
cadet in that way, but afterward ascer
tained that It was the formal notifica
tion to the sun that they were through
with him for the day.
Climbing the hill, I at once reported,
as I had been instructed to do, to the
commandant. Gen. MacMahon was
the commandant of the post at that
time. He afterward committed suicide
by throwing himself from a Hudson
river boat I hold myself guiltless in
the matter, and cannot beur to think
that my appearance had anything to
do with it, although I afterward real
ized that a "plebe" with a "plug" hat
was looked upon as a sort of freak in
military circles.
The commandant gave me the liberty
ol West Point until the following morn
ing at nine o'clock, when I was to re
port to the medical examiners. I re
paired to Cozzen's hotel, obtained a
sentry box on the top floor, and went
to bed.
At nine o'clock the next morning I
reported to the medical examiners.
There were three of them anil they
were in full uniform. Hy their direc
tions I stripped off my clothes. They
then held up cards of different hue!
and compelled me to guess their colors.
Then they exhibited cards printed in
different-sized letters and I was in
structed to read the print at different
distances.
Then 1 was compelled to hop around
the room like a frog, first on one foot
und then on the other. Then I had to
swing my arms around in different di
rections until I resembled a wind
mill working on full time. When I
imagined that they were altout through
with me one of them placed his ear
against my spinal column, supposedly
for the purpose of ascertaining what
was going on inside.
Another tapped me on the chest and
then listened, evidently with a desire tc
ascertain if lie would be invited tc
spend the day. While they were thut
amusing themselves with me the third
was taking measurements of my
height, bre.tdth, depth and style oJ
beauty. I was finally informed that if
1 had any use for my clothes I could
put them on.
"Am I sound?" I asked.
Hy that time 1 wa< weary of soldier
lile.-aad prayed iaWardl vi.tUaU.Ucy
BUTLER, PA.,FRIDAY, JULY >24. IK9I.
THE KIItST I-OSITIOX OF A SOI.DIEIt.
nau discovered enougn mseases aoout
me to start a clinic. Unluckily, I was
healthy.
I was next given over into the tender
care of an orderly, who was instructed
to conduct me to the cadet barracks at
the other side of the square. As we
started to cross the yard, he looked al
my glossy "plug" and chuckled.
"If I'd 'a' been yon, I wouldn't 'a'
worn that hat up here," he said, com
miseratingly; "that hat's going to get
you into a heap oI trouble."
It did. We had not proceeded a rod
before nearly every window of tbe
huge, three-sided barracks was filled
with howling cadets, who had spotted it.
"Take that thing away and drown it,
orderly!"
"What kind of bate did you use?"
"Don't want any! Come around next
week!"
"Block and run!"
"Get on to the kid under the pipey!"
"I'a, please kin I wear a high liat?"
Those were some of the salutations
that greeted me aud I realized that I
was in for it. I shivered, but the or
derly never moved an eyelash. He was
accustomed to such pleasantries. He
led me upstairs to the second floor,
front room. He tapped upon the door,
a voice said: "Come!" and he left me to
my fate.
1 want to say right here that I have
not exaggerated in the least, and that
I am giving my actual experience for
the benefit of prospective cadets. If
they succeed in obtaining appoint
ments, they will bear me out in my
statements.
"Why don't you come when you're
invited?" yelled half a dozen voices in
chorus.
I came. I found myself in a room
about twelve by fourteen feet in fli
mensions. It was occupied by six
young men in cadet fatigue uniform.
They were the cadet officers who took
tender care of the verdant plcbe and in
stilled into his budding mind the first
principles of warriorship.
I had scarcely entered the room when
my hat was landed in one corner of the
room and my grip in another. Two of
them caught a hand apiece, jerked it
down the sides of my legs, jammed the
little finger of each hand along the
scams of my trousers, flattening out the
palms full to the front.
Another grabbed me by the shoul
ders, placed his knee in my back and
pulled me out straight until I cracked.
Still another was busy dislocating my
chin, while the fifth was jerking my
feet into "V" shape. The sixth was
driving a tack into the wall at about
the height of my nose.
After tliey h«'l me fixc«l to
their satisfaction, and so that I looked
as if I was ready to be conveyed to the
chamber of horrors in the Kden Musee,
I was informed that that was the first
position of a soldier. Then I pitied the
soldiers, although I had never seen one
look like that, and I wondcretl what
the last position of a soldier must be if
the first was as hard to do as that.
Compressed into this state of being,
I was inarched over to the tack and
commanded to place my nose against
it and to move at my peril. Then, in
order to divert my attention from the
tack, so that they might be able to jerk
me out of the first position of a soldier
and thus have more fun with me by
fixing me up all right again, they
hurled such questions as these at me:
"What's you name?"
"Age?"
"How's your mother?"
"Got any dynamite in your grip?"
"Wherc'd you get that hat?"
"Where were you born?"
"Sorry or glad that you were born?"
"Don't you think it was a waste of
material?"
"Think you'll make a good soldier?"
"Married?"
"llow many children?"
••now much Is twice two?"
"Why?"
"llow far is it from here to some
where else and back if you run both
ways?"
"Are you white or colored?"
"Head and write?"
"Pa alive?"
"What for?"
"Grandma got any teeth?"
"How many?"
"Why didn't you count 'em?"
"Is she a flirt?"
'"Fraid of a nigger man in the dark?"
"Fiver scalp a wooden Indian?"
"How many fingers on each hand?"
"How many thumbs?"
"Both alike, ain't they?"
"Any insane people in your family
except yourself?"
These and a hundred other entertain
ing questions were put to me. Although
I was all afire, I could uot help but
laugh at some of the conundrums.
Whenever I did so my nose was ham
mered up against the tack and 1 was
threatened with the guard bouse.
Finally, more dead than alive, I was
told to shoulder my grip and "plug,"
and I was conducted to my temporary
quarters on the top floor of the bar
racks. I was shoved through a door
way and found myself in a room al
ready occupied by eight other plcl>eß
who had jnst passed through the ordeal
experienced by inc.
After the officer had departed they
greeted tne with a howl. We were
won friends, however, as wc were to
be roommates and bedfellows until the
"mental examination" should decide
our respective fates. We did not know
each other by our names, but by the
states wc hailed from. In my quarters
were "Texas," "Virginia," "Califor
nia," "Alabama," "Wisconsin," "Mis
souri," "Arkansas," "Maryland," and
"New York," myself.
This was our daily routine: Reveille,
B:30; up and dress. Inspection, return to
rooms and make up beds; 0:.'l0 break
fast. From that until noon we studied
or did as we pleased in our quarters.
At noon we were marched to Mess
hall for dinner. In the afternoon we
had another inspection, and at 5::i0 we
were marched to supper. At nine
o'clock "taps" our beds, which had pre
viously l>een made, were hastily en
tered as the lights were doused.
Kacli "plebe" had to make his own
bed ami help take care of the room In
the morning the blankets, sheets, pil
lows, etc. (of all nine of us), had to bo
folded and placed one above the other,
HO that their edges, in a vertical line,
should nqt vary a hair's breadth. If
they did they were kicked down by the
officer, and had to be rearranged.
At all hours of the day and night hu
morous cadets would "drop in to make
a call," anil then they would put us
through "a course of spouts." such as
compelling us to sing, to whistle, to
dance, and to hop from trunk to
mantel aud "chirp like a mocking
bird." Another diversion for the cadets
wan to catch a "plebe," when he WM
cotnoelled to iro to the Kurd, and "plav
horsey" with him, the "plebc" walking
on his hands and knees with the cadet
astride of his back.
"Why stand it?" asked the prospect
ive "plebe." Stand it or light. If you
fight you will have to fight the whole
corps, ltetter to stand it anil wait until
you become a cadet and the next batch
of "phebes" arrives. Then you have
an opportunity of getting square.
After a week of this brand of excite
ment we were marched to the hall
where our mental status was to be in
vestigated, and I desire to state that
no "plebe" is permitted to appear out
side his quarters unless he assumes the
first position of a soldier—shoulders
thrown backward, chest forward, toes
turned outward, and little fingers down
the seams of the trousers.
This position must also be assumed
whenever any frisky cadet knocks at
the door of the quarters, even if it is in
the early morning hour, and I have
seen nine shivering "plebes," awakened
"PI.AYIXO HORSEY."
long after midnight, startled by a rap
on the door and standing in their night
clothes "in the first position of a sol
dier." In tlu-se festivities my new hat
came in for its share of the fun. and it
finally became of so much trouble to
me that I traded with one of the boot
blacks for au old cap
The "mental examination" consisted
of questions in the rudiments of arith
metic, geography, grammar, history,
etc. To do work in arithmetic through
decimal fractions, to bound states and
locate their capitals, and tell how to
travel from on<* point to another, to
name the presidents of the United
States and to have a fair knowledge of
ancient and modern history; to be ablo
to parse sentences and to read, write
and spell correctly was all that was
required of us.
Those who passed their examinations
had their choice of roommates so far a*
was possible, aud cadet lifo b.*gan with
two in each room. Those "found" fail
ing to pass examination were dismissed.
The examination always begins in
June and the cadets go into camp on
the parade ground and have all the
hard work and fun combined that they
want. I remained there three months.
Then a colored cadet got hit with a
dipper. A dozen of us came to New
York that night and the country was
deprived of the valuable services of
that number of possible Indian fight
ers. —N. Y. Times.
MUi June* and the Byn*«-
A prrt*j;ssor of rhetoric arv-r dilating
fully upon the synecdoche as a figure in
which things are associated by us, as
part to whole or whole to part, read
the following example:
"The sanctity of the lawn should be
kept unsullii*d."
".Miss Jones will recast the sentence,
using plain language," said the profes
sor.
Miss Jones, who had not been paying
interested attention,and whose thoughts
did not suggest to her the robe of a
bishop as the sentence was read, re
plied.
"I—don't—know —unless," (here a
bright idea dawned upon her) "it means
'Keep off the grass.'" —Lillian Mayne,
in Wide Awake.
He I»rcw the I.lnn.
"Well, Penn," said Hannibal, survey
ing the room critically, "you have
mighty snug quarters here for a bach
elor, I must say—books, papers photo
graphs of pretty girls—stunners, too—
Hello! here's a scrap book. (Examines,
and turns to Penn with a look of dis
gust.) Oh, I say, it can't be possible
that you laugh at these so-called humor
ous paragraphs?"
"Kxcuse me," replied I'enn, coldly.
"You are unjust. I write them; Ido
not read them." —Harper's Uazar.
A Candid SlMtrment.
(lid Moneybags lie fore I give my
consent to your marriage with my
daughter, I shall have to inquire how
much property you have, Mr. (iawle.
Young (iawle —Not much at present,
sir, but I expect to inherit a large for
tune.
Old Moneybags From whom, may I
ask?
Young Oawle—From my father-in
law. —Munsey's Weekly.
A iiond Kfiiioii.
At a social gathering a young widow
did not engage in tripping the light fan
tastic toe. A gentleman approached
her and asked:
"Are you not going to dance this even
ing?"
"Not until after midnight."
"Why not before?"
"Because to-day is the anniversary of
my second husband's death."—Texas
Siftings.
••ALL TIIK MAMK IN TIIK END."
Pl* '
—Life.
lie Knew What He Wanted.
Farmer Hayseed—Why don't you gim
ine a finger bowl? Think I'm a green
horn, eh?
Waiter Hut you've had no fruit, sir.
Farmf-r Hayseed -What's that to you?
I've liud my dinner, and you can tell
your bloated up ol' boss liack thar I
won't pay for it till I get a finger-bowl.
See? He gad dinged 'f I will!— Texas
Siftings.
A llar<l Worker.
Dudeleigh—Aw, Nicely, idd fellah,
you look tialid.
Nicely Jove, old chappie, but I
should fawncy I might. Been working
all the mawning.
Dudeteigh—Working? Why, how, old
fellah?
Nicely I've lieen labowing undah an
impwession. Boston Courier.
Mint Out.
"We have Come to offer you an in
crease in salary," said the deacon, "but
we have doubts whether you will accept
it."
"Why so?" iu>ked the parson, eagerly.
"Because." said the deacon, "we
haven't lieen able tocolleet it." —Judge.
OYSTER PLANTING.
How the Natives Are Bred on the
Shore of Chesapeake Bay.
Interesting Fart* C <incerni»|f the Growth
und Development of the Itl
valvM -I niter the I.*w'i
Protection.
When the Chesapeake oysterman has
put away the tongs and dredge, tied up
his boat and balanced hi- books in the
spring, he immediately turns his atten
tion towards laying out new parks or
rehabilitating the old ones, says the
Philadelphia Times. The close of the
season for oysters in the I hesapeake
bay and its tributaries is from April 15
to Septeinl>cr 15, and there is a vast
amount of work to be performed ero
the tongmuu or ilr. dger can a_'ain hoist
sail on his puugy or canoe and offer his
cargo for sale in the city markets.
It has been a matter of great concern
among the authorities regarding the de
pletion of the oyster crop in Chesapeake
waters by ovcrdredging or through oth
er sources of apparent destruction. But
the enactment of wise laws from time
to time and the rigid enforcement of
the same have in a measure checked the
wanton annihilation of the oyster parks,
and thus, while many new ones have
been laid out, the old ones have had
time to recuperate.
The law prohibits the taking of
oysters on Sunday or ;.t night, and dur
iug the close season not more than live
bushels per day are permitted to ba
taken, and no oysters in the shell are
allowed to be sold outside the boundary
of the state of Maryland.
A park consists of live acres of ma
rine territory, which may In? selected
by any native first taking out a license
for the same, at any convenient point,
so as not to interfere with or obstruct
navigation. The place usually selected
is in the quiescent waters of s >me eove
or creek, and, if for tonging purposes,
in shallow waters and upon as hard a
bottom as it i.-. possible to secure Ow
ing to the remarkable fecundity of the
oyster two or three years is sufficient to
afford a paying park. The sandy bot
tom is first covered with several loads
of oyster shells, which are spread about
evenly, to which the spat may adhere
in the process of generation.
The old parks are carefully gone over
with a light rake in order to remove
the weeds and the accumulation of
Other foreign substances, and clay
pipes, old shoes and pieces of chain
have been taken up to which adhered
from fifty to sixty young fry all the way
from the size of a three-cent piece to a
silver quarter. This raking also has a
tendency to break up the density and
compactness of the oysters aud affords
them greater facility to attain their
natural shaped—the elongated shell,
known in oyster parlance as the "cat's
tongue," deriving this abnormal shape
from the fact that comprt ssion prevents
its expanding properly during its
growth, and many curious freaks in
shape of shell are in the museums,
caused by negligence and failure to re
lieve this density at the proper time.
The spawn of the female is reputed
to produce over one million young, and
it isduringtUis period that the oyster has
a very thin, dark appearance. It is said
that if all the spat should mature the
creeks anil coves would be one vast
mine of oyster shells several feet in
thickness. But from the time this spat
ascends to the surface until it finally in
crcaac.i in size and ru iifht utK» actllCS
down to the bottom again, it has to en
counter many difficulties, for, floating
about aimlessly on the surface like a
great roll of white ribbon, a great part
of it is destroyed by storm or by adher
ing to overhanging tree limbs, or being
eaten up by fish; and even after it has
found a resting place on the old parks
and developed into the tiny oyster it is
still pursued by its relentless enemies,
the starfish and periwinkle, the latter
boring through the tender shell and
sucking out the oyster. In midsummer
this spat may be been drifting about far
out on the waters of the Delaware and
Chesapeake bays, and has frequently
been the object of great curiosity among
excursionists.
An old native at Koariug Point, who
was preparing to go out to his park,
was asked what he thought of the re
ports concerning the depletion of the
oj*sters in the Chesapeake bay, re
moved his pipe from his mouth, and,
with a smile, said:
"If the authorities enforce the law as
they have been doing and the people
give more intelligent attention to the
cultivation of the oyster it will bo very
many years yet before the tongs or
dredge fail to take up an oyster in these
waters. Why, bless me, I'vo no doubt
there are beds to-day where this drift
spat has settled that have existed for
years in spots under the waters of the
bay that we know nothing of."
Strength of Men and Women.
A French scientist who experimented
with fifty persons of both sexes, using
a machine for compression as a test of
strength, found that the strongest man
was able to produce with his right hand
a pressure equivalent to eighty-five
kilograms (a kilogram is rather more
than two pounds) and the weakest to
forty kilograms, the average being
fifty-six kilograms. One curious result
was arrived at; the short men were aU
very nearly as strong as the tall men,
the average difference between equal
groups of two sizes being only three
kilograms. The force of the strongest
woman of the fifty who were selected
amounted to only forty-four kilograms,
and that of the weakest to sixteen kilo
grams, while the average was thirty
three kilograms.
Napoleon'* Nitmo In ltul>.
The name "Napoleon," according to a
writer In the Nouvelle Itevue, was to l»e
found during the middle ages more fre
quently 111 central Italy than iu north
ern Italy, but it was not beard in Naples
itself. From this it is argued that the
appellation was used to designate
families that ln;d removed from the
vicinity of Vesuvius, just as the (iae
tani, tiie Adriuui, the Koniani, the For
loni and others derived their names from
their native 'owns
All Took a Hand.
The Bavarian are in many
respects similar to the Irish. They
drink a great deal, are quite witty, and
are never so happy as when they are
fighting with each other. A story is
told of two Bavarian peasants meeting
on the road and holding the following
conversation:
"Were you at the wedding last
night?"
"Indeed I was. It was the nicest
wedding we have had this season. Why,
even the bride took a hand in the tight."
—Texas Siftings.
A IMsCOI'NT rOK QUANTITY.
Mr. Du Poy (at Asbury park)— What
do you ask for your bath houses by tbe
hour?
Owner (sizing his customer) —Two for
• quarter, sir.—Judge. ..
A PECULIAR REVENGE.
Sad Fate of an Old l*arty Who Did Not
Apologise.
It was on a suburban train coming in
to Jersey City, says the New York Sun.
A bald-headed, fussy-looking man, with
a pair of spectacles on his nose and his
hat on the seat beside him, kept rub
bing his pate in a nervous way and
hitching about on the seat as if afraid
of tacks. Opp.wite him sat a man who
was closely watching his movements
and chuckling and grinning nntil the
attention of a dozen people was at
tracted. He was finally asked to ex
plain, and he said:
"The old chap over there sat down
on my hat, stepped on my toes and el
bowed my ribs and didn't apolo
gize. I determined to pet even with
him. He always sits in that seat if it
isn't occupied, and he alrfays hunts
around to find a paper instead of buying
one. I'm getting even with him this
morning."
"But how?"
"That paper is just three years old
to-day. It cast me fifty cents to pro
cure it, but I've bad fifty dollars' worth
of revenge. I left it on the seat, and
he's been reading it for the last twenty
miles. See?"
The old fellow struck the head
lines of a railroad accident, looked
puzzled, bobbed up and down and slow
ly shook his head. He jumped from
that to a murder—on to news from
Washington—and for a minute was In
terested in the stock market. Then he
folded the paper up, removed his glass
es, and looked out of the window with
a troubled expression on his face.
"He's wondering if his mind isn't
giving way, and is half scared to death,"
chuckled the joker. "Been flattering
himself that he is good for twenty years
yet, and the first thing he does when he
gets to the city will be to buy some
brain food and a liver pad. I'm not a
bad. bad man, but the chap who sits
down on my hat must at least apolo
gize."
"ON TIME."
An KiiKlUbman'a Experience on an Amer
ican Kallroad.
It is a matter of pride with railroad
companies to run their trains on time,
or to come as near to punctuality as
possible. This well-known fact no
doubt explains an incident which an
English traveler relates in connection
with a journey which he took across the
American continent. It was on one of
the great transcontinental lines which
had made special promises as to punc
tuality.
On the journey, the English traveler
seemed to notice a marked disregard
for the time-table, but he was inter
ested in the country, and made no com
plaint.
At last the Pacific terminus was
reached. There he met a beaming offi
cial of the company, who, pulling his
own watch out, said:
"Just look and see what time you'vo
got, will you, please?"
"It wants ten minutes of one," said
the Englishman, a little puzzled.
"Yes, sir; twelve-fifty, exactly! And
that's the time she's scheduled to ar
rive! How's that for promptness?
Crossing the continent, almost three
thousand miles, and getting here at
twelve-fifty o'clock, precisely as adver
tised."
"I can't deny that, you know," said
the Englishman. "It's very fine, no
doubt; but look here —how many days
were you late?"
"Oh, a matter of two or three, per
haps; but we struck the coast at twelve
fifty!"
CITY OF THE UNKNOWN.
Aitec Metropolis Which Indiana Say No
White 3lan Haa Ever Seen.
"During the frequent visits I have
made to Mexico," said a mining en
gineer of Philadelphia to an inquirer
reporter, "I have come in contact with
many of the Indians resident there and
have heard some very singular stories.
One, which all the Indians unite in tell
ing, is that far in the interior exists an
enormous city, never yet visited by
white men. It Is described as peopled
by a race similar to tho ancient Aztecs,
who are sun worshipers and offer
human sacrifices to their deity.
"The race is said to be in a high stato
of civilization, and the Indians say that
the city is full of huge structures which
are miracles of quaint but beautiful
architecture, and are situated on broad,
paved streets far surpassing those of
tho City of Mexico.
'Vine Indian, I recollect, assured me
that he had seen the city and its inhab
itants with his own eyes, but had been
afrnid of being aaptured and had fled.
Of course, I did not believe him, but, all
the same, It Is not a little strange that
the accounts of the Mexican Indians
relative to the mysterious and magnifi
cent interior city agree perfectly."
Call for ThU Steak.
Only a few people know that In every
carcass of beef there is a choice morsel.
Butchers don't tell their customers
alfout it, and very seldom are there any
calls for It. We prefer to reserve It for
our own tables, says a butcher. This
rare cut is known as "skirt steak." It
Is a thin, fiat bit of meat, tender and
Juicy ns young grass, adhering to the
ribs oil either side of the fore part of
the steer. The rarity of it is in the fact
that out of a whole beef you can get
only about two pounds of this steak.
It is so thin that it wiU not fry or
broil well in the ordinary way, and the
way I have it cooked is to fry briskly in
clear, boiling lard. When thus cooked,
served piping hot, It Is delicious. Of
course it comes high.
I'rlnce Albert's Memory.
The remarkable memory the prinoe of
Wales has, that enables him to recall
little incidents In the careers of com
parative strangers who meet him, is the
result of assiduous practice. He reads
the newspapers with as much attention
as an editor does and stores away in his
memory for future use every scrap of
information relating to people who are
likely to IK? thrown in his way. Ho haa
trained Ills eye so that on entering a
room lie sees everybody there at a
glance, and possesses a marvelous fac
iilty for recollecting faces.
Not a Surprlar.
Marie—Would you be surprised if I
told you that .lack White proposed to
me last night?
Ijouise—Not st all. I knew his cred
itors were pressing liim terribly, and I
fully expected he would do something
desperate.—Munsey's Weekly.
A Strang* Or«lrr.
Little MihK —Mamma don't waut jou
to look out of the window so much.
New Girl—An' pliy not?
"Because it makes people stare."
"Sure, didn't they ivcr see a good
lukin' face in these windlea before?"—
Good News. .
Taking an I'nfalr Advantage.
Kainbo —That's a curious kind of a
sign across the way.
lialdwin (reading it) —"Step inside
for the I>est mint julep in the city."
Kambo (with alacrity) Thanks,
Baldwin. Igo you!— Chicago Tribune.
How ll« Hrjirtltd It.
Cumso—Jinks has just been saved
from a terrible fate.
Mrs. Cumso—Why, he was killed by
a runaway horse yesterday.
Cumso—True; bid he was to have
been married next week. Judge.
It All l>ependa.
"Is a check payment for a debt? - '
queried Bangle.
"Well, that depends. Jay Gould's
would be, but I'd rather have cash from
you," returned Wimpleton.— Munsey's
Weeklv. .. . _
:NX>. 37
Net Mack mt a UmptlM.
A Texas merchant sent bis clerk for
the twentieth time to the residence at
a prominent citizen to collect a bill.
"Did you fret anything 1 ?" asked the
merchant on the return of the clerk.
I "Nothing at all. They told me to
come into the reception room, as usual,
but I didn't receive anything."—Texas
Siftings. ;
A l; i.i vrkmbU KIfUU.
I'lain Citizen (to editor of Dinkeyrflle
Clarion) —Why do you call Wahoo t
prominent and influential citizen? He
has never done anything worth notlo
ing.
Editor—Hasn't hey? Gosh Almighty,
man! He has just paid me two years'
subscription in advance ! Brooklyn
Life.
ll» Advantages.
"I tell you. Bill," said Smoky Mike,
the burglar, "we hard-work in' thieves
don't make half as much money outo*
j the business as them dude bank presi-
I dents and l'onusylvania officials."
j "That's so, Smoky," returned BilL
"An' that just shows the value of eddl
cation, which 1 has frequently
• marked." —Puck.
lie Had a Flu.
Her Father (dubiously)— l don't know
I what you are going to marry on. You
have but a small salary and my daugh
j ter has no fortune.
' Iler Lover (confidently)— Oh, wall,
if you are economical for a year or
two, you'll be able to start us all right.
] —Munsey's Weekly.
A F.. r-Slghtmi CI tlx**.
W'lggins—How is this? You said a
■ year or two ago that you intended to
j move to Chicago.
Diggins—Since Chicago got the world's
fair 1 have changed my mind.
•'Why so?"
"Too many relatives."—N. Y. Weekly.
Ma and Pa.
Mrs. De Style— The expressman haa
come with my box of Worth dresses.
Tell pa to go down and pay him.
Little Son—Pa can't go down now.
lie's sewing a patch on his pant*.—
Good News.
Nut a Title Hunter.
(iossiper—Everybody is saying you
married Count De Golde for his title.
American Girl— That's a base slander.
I never thought of his title. I married
him for his money. — N. Y. Weekly.
It Mad* • Difference.
Mrs. de Peyster— lf I lived as near to
you as you do to me I'd run over to see
you real often.
Mrs. Darling— l guess you don't know
that we moved last month.—Judge.
An Assared DMIIOJ.
She—Do you think Ibsen's drama is
the drama of the future?
He—Yes, and always will be.—Judge.
la th* Moianaa.
"So, that is the witch, is it?"
"No. It's the what-ls-it."—Puck.
"XVLTCX IN PAMTO."
II
—Jury.
The Timidity of Waalth.
Old Gentleman (to street car driver)
—My friend, what do you do with your
wages every week—put part of it in the
savings bank?
Driver No, sir. After payin' the
butcher an' grocer an' rent, I pack
away what's left in barrels. I'm afraid
of them savin's banks. — Yankee Blade.
Krone In the Kerfrd*r*s o«e*.
Judge Duffy— Witness, did I under
stand you to swear that you saw the ac
cused at ten o'clock op Tuesday on
Union square?
Witness (slightly tight) I can't
schwear to it, your honor, but I'll bet
you two schiKincrs of beer I saw him. —
Texas Siftings.
riasllc but Predlapsssd.
She—No, I don't think I ought to
marry you. I've never known what it
is to be in love.
lie—But don't you think jou might
learn that after you married me?
She—Yes; but I want to take lessons
under somebody else.— Judge.
Hit Water!**.
Elderly Heiress (sadly) No, Mr.
Jones, my heart is dead to the tender
passion. The only man 1 ever loved, or
could ever love, was killed at the battle
of —of —
Mr. Jones (disappointed, and reach
ing for his hat) —Waterloo! —Jury.
Deceptive Appearance.
"You wouldn't take him for a self
made man, would you?"
"I see nothing particular in him.
About the average run of waiters."
"Well, he isn't a self-made man.
He was luade to -order." —Philadelphia
Times. _
juration of Quality.
Sweet Girl ilraduate —(to train boy)
—ls this book good?
Boy—No; hud.
S. G. O.—Then I'll take it.—Puck.
A Definition. Ily Jove !
"What is the Juno type of beauty I
hear so much about?"
"Any type of beauty which one's hus
band has ceased to admire.'j—Judirc.
lino tli* Heavy Kn.otlonal.
"I)r. Firstly isn't much of a preacher,
j-et all the women are in love with
him."
"How do you account for it?"
"He is the best voice trembler in
town." —Puck.
Heea Oat Over It.
Friend —How's real estate in the sub-'
orbs to-day?
Real Estate Agent (emptying the
muddy water from his boots) —Out of
light, sir—simply out of sight!—Chica-.
jo Tribune.
l'roof of Insanity.
Constable — This fellow is a burglar.
[ caught him trying to break Into the
residence of Mr. Gould, and- -
Judge —Take the poor fellow to the,
lunatic asylum.— Munsey's Weekly.
The Worm Will Torn.
Talkative Man (on street car)— Fine
weather for the gardens.
Sufferer (sitting next to him)— Yes.
liaising anything besides onions in
fours? -Chicago Tribune.
Faahlo-i Note.
Mrs. Peterby— Do you think this hat
matches inv hair?
Mr. PeU rby—Well, if it don't, it is,
rasv enough for you to buy some other
sair.—Texas Siftings.
Too Late.
"Remember, my son, it's never to#'
.ate to mend."
"Yes, it is. Look at these pant*."
—Judge.