VOL XXVII
"WlttlAMltAND.
II 30 'S MAIN .ST. ~%Z
The Truth About sell a thousand cus
tomers what they
yx /~Ai j-i * „ ought to wear than
C/LIF ten thousand and
get their ill-will.
The testimony of thousands of customers is back ol oui
word. We depend on their finding out that our high standard,
best ready-made is the cheapest, because it gives the best,long
est service.
The fact is we run oiir business on two simple principles
—to sell the beat—and sell it low You find it out. •
fcVhy shouldn't we? r we get absolutely dependable qualities:
with best trimmings.
And, we don't know any way to make money so fast as
by snaking a small profit off' ten thousand rather than a big
profit oft one thousand. Doing that has made our store twice
as big as any other: our trade more than twice as big.
Honest All-Wool Suits (Men's) $y to sl."i.
Hood to Finest Overcoat* and TTlsters, s•"> to sls.
Dress Suits (best stock to seen), sl3 to S2O.
Trousers by thousands, s2.f>o to SB.
J. N. PATTERSON'S,
One Price Clothing House,
29 S. MAIN ST., BUTLER, PA.
HENRY BIEHL
14 NORTH MAIN STREET,
EU'TLS'R ZFTE-N IN"'A
DEALER IN
Hardware and House Furnishing Goods.
Stitches Per Minute.)
Agri cultural Inipleni ents,
Kramer Wagons,
Buggies, Carts, Wheel Barrows, Braminer Washing Machines,
New Sunshine and Howard Ranges, Stoves, Table
and pocket Cutler}', Hanging Lamps. Man
ufacturer ol Tinware, Tin
and Spouting A Specialty.
WHERE A CHILD CAN BUY AS CHEAP AS A MAN.
There is no Doubt
As to where you should buy your new dress, il economy is the
object you have in view, and you will agree with us, after you
have examined our line and prices in Silks, Satins, Cashmeres,
Serges, Henrettas, Broadcloths, Flannels, English Suitings in
plain and novelty plaids.
UND ERWKA.R
For Ladies, Gents, Misses and Children which we know
can not be equaled anywhere for value and price.
Blankets, Flannels, Yarns, Plushes, Velvets, Ribbon, Hos
iery and Notions of all kinds.
CARPETS,
OIL CLOTHS,
AND LACE CURTAINS
In all the new fall patterns and designs.
We arc showing the grandest line of Ladies. Misses and
Childrens
o=L=o—A=K=B
Ever brought to Butler, to convince you that the place to do
your trading is with us.all we ask is that you call and examine
prices and be convinced.
TROUTMAN'S.
Leading Dry Goods and Carpet House, Butler, Pa-
J. R. GRIEB. PROF. R. J. LAMB.
GRIEB & LAMB'S MUSIC STORE.
NO. 16 SOUTH MAIN ST., BUTLER, PA.
BSole Agents for Butler, Mercer and Clar
ion counties for Bohr Bros. Magnificent Pi
anos, New by & Evans' Pianos, Smith-
American and Carpenter Organs, Importers
of the Celebrated Steinmeyer Pianos, and
Dealers in Violins, Bruno Guitars, and
All. Kinds of Musical Instruments.
SHEET MUSIC A SPECIALTY
Pianos and Organs sold on installments. Old Instruments
taken in exchange. Comu and see us, as we
can save you money.
Tuning and Repairing of all kinds .of Musical Instruments
Promptly attended to. |
<*o f f i-r * :'*&*
THE BUTLER CITIZEN.
PROFESSIO NA L CA It DS.
_ >,J. y
J. W HUTCHISON,
A'noltXKY AT LAW.
R.nice on second llojr of the HiiseJlon block,
[ Diamond. Hurler, t'.i. Uoom No. I.
j A. T. SCOTT. j. T. WILSOW.
scorr & wiLsow,
A'ITOItNKYS-AT-I.AW.
1 i'ollectlolls h spe i lity. OHMM No. . SoUtli
; Diamond, llutler. i'a.
JAMES N. MOORE,
ATTOBNKV-AT-LAW ASH XOTAUY I'CBI.H .
! office In Koom No. l. second floor of lluselton
| Block, entrance on Diamond.
P. W. LOWRY,
ATTORNKY AT LAW.
l'.ooin No. 3. Anderson nulldlm, F . Butler. Pa.
I
A. E. RUSSELL,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
| Office on second floor of New Anderson Mock
' Main St..—near Diamond.
■
IRA McJUNKIN.
I Attorney at Law. Oflle© at No. 17, East Jeffer
son St.. Butler. Pa.
W. C. FINDLEY,
Attorney at Law and Heal Kstate Agent. <>l
tier rear of L. Z. Mitchell's oftlee on north side
of Diamond, llutler. f.t.
H. H. GOUCHER.
Attorney-at-law. Office on second floor ol
Anderson building, near Court House. Butler,
I'n.
J. fr . BRITT A IN.
Att'y at TAW—Office at s. K. cor. Main St., .ma
Diamond, Butler, fa.
NEWTON BLACK.
Att'y at Law—Office on South side of Diamond
Butler, Pa.
JOHN M. RUSSELL,
Attorney-at-Law. Office on South side or Dia
mond, Butler. Pa.
j C. F. L. McQUISTION,
EN'tiIXEER AXD SURVEYOR,
| OFHCK NKAIt BliMn Rcri.E It, P<.
I t. Vi. ZIMMERMAN.
RILYSICIAN AND SCKUEON,
Office at No. 45, S. Mala street, over Frank
Co's Diug Store. Butler. Pa,
SAMUEL M. BIPPUS.
Physician and Surgeon.
So. 10 vVest Cunningham St.,
BLTirLiiniß,, PE
W. R. TITZEL.
PHYSICIAN AM ' SURGEON.
S. W. Corner Main and North Sis.
BUTLER PEJM IST' A.
DR. S. A. JOHNSTON.
DENTIST, - - BUTLER, PA.
All work pertaining to the profession execut
ed 111 the neatest manner.
SpeciaWes :—Gold Killings, and Painless Ex
traction ol Teeth, Vitalized Air administered,
onicf on Jefferson Street, one door E«»t of Lonrj
House, Up Stairs.
Ofllee open daily, except Wednesdays and
Thursdays. Communications by mail receive
prompt attention,
X. B.—The only Dentist In Duller using the
best makes of teeth.
L. iS. McJUNKLV,
Insurance and Heal Estate iljj't
17 EAST JEFFERSON ST.
BUTLER, - JPA.
E- E. ABRAMS&CO
Fire and Lite
INBITR A X C E
In.-urane v Co. of North America, incor
porated 17& 4 , capital $3,000,000 and other
strong compinies represented. New York
Life Insurance Co., assets $90,000,000. Ofliee
New lluselton building near Court House.
BUTLER COUNTY
fi/Ustua! iFire insurance Co.
Office Cor, Main & Cunningham Sts,
vi. C. ROESSING, PUEHIDENT.
WM. CAMPBELL TUKASUKKR
11. C. HEINEMAN, SECRETARY
DIRECTORS:
J. L Purvis, Samuel Anderson,
William Campbell J. \V. Uurkhart.
A. Trout man, Henderson Oliver,
G. C. Hoessim;, .lames Stephenson,
I>r. W. Irvin, llenrv Wliitinire.
J. F. Taylor. 11. C. tleineinan,
LOYAL M'JUNKIN, GOD. AC'<.
STrX'XjUDIR.,
BARGAINS
IN
Wall Paper.
For the next sixty days we
will ofi'cr bargains in all our
gilt and embossed wall papers,
in order to reduce stock and
make room for Holiday (roods,
J. H. Douglass,
Near P ostcffice,. Butler Pa
LIKE SMI NUBSERKS
ERIE, A.
All stock guaranteed to be in good con
dition when delivered.
We replace all trees that fail to grow.
DEFERENCES IN' BUTLER:
J. i\ Lowry, W. T. Mccliling, James
Sh.mor, Jr.. J. K. l'orsytbe, (!co. ShatFner,
Walker, Esq., Ferd lteiber, Esq. and 1).
L. (.'lceland.
G. F. KING, AGT.
EITEJttfJLLEB Hoi st, 13cutU, FA. '
,\ MAID OF THE MINES.
I.ittle more than :i generation ago, tile
single line of railroad ftcros, Western
Pennsylvania li.'nl not yet coin uienced tho
j arowth of it JJ recent octopu.s-Jikif anus.
hikl, a conscquch'ee, tin- huge iron in
i dustrios of Westmoreland Cmiafy were
■till in their in fancy.
In the days there were l'cvv iu ure n-]y
and rugged localities east of the Mi--i p
in, or indeed, in the whole world, than that
'• portion of the A 1 legh en ies lying almost mid
j way between Pittsburg and the State Cap
j ital. Even to-day tiie bnniau hivess of in
! dnstry which ihc mines and blastfurnaces
j have focused on those bleak hill-sides, eau
i not boast of much refinement; thirty years
j ago one of the roughest of rough commun
j ities was that which had been drawn
together for the purpose of operating the
i Dent Scar mine.
| At that time the Dent Scar Iron and
I Coal Company, limited, had not so much
i as dreamed of its later phenomenal success:
I it was a young and feeble enterprise em-
J ploying not more than fifty or sixty men,
I chiefly miners. Ry far the larger number
j were unmarried, or at any rate had left
j their wives and families amid more civiliz
! Ed and congenial surroundings than Dent
Sear could yet afford, aud these made
their headquarters at a frail but rather ex
tensive structure known as the Miner's
Hotel. The men who indulged in such ab
surdly superfluous luxuries as wives and
children, occupied little huts and shanties,
and for the most part dragged out a cheek
| ered existence in squalor and dirt. Of
! womankind there were positively no inter
| esting specimens at Dent Scar —save one.
This was Jen Saxton, a girl of 20, the
only child and acting housekeeper of an
old miner, whoso wife had deserted him
and his child years before. Doubtless it
would have been tetter for Jen if her pa
ternal parent had also left her to the ten
der mercies of the world, before i e took
her into such a God-forsaken and utterly
outlandish locality. For the old man
(who was when sober, really one of the
best miners in the district) spent every
penny of his largo earnings at the bar of
the Miner's Hotel, and, in a community
where c \ ery full grown man went to bed
drunk at least twice a week, was a marked
individual —bearing as a peculiar distinc
tion the sobriquet of "P.ugjnice Saxton."
Physically, Jen Saxton at 20 was sim
ply perfection and a magnificent specimen
of grandly developed womanhood. Intel
lectually she was more ignorant than a
street gamin, lor she certainly could not
have distinguished between a newspaper
and a railroad time schedule. Morally—
well, morality was an article not in great
demand in the vicinity of the Dent Scar
mine. And yet, as morals went in West
moreland about that time, Jen had done
nothing decidedly bad; on the contrary, licr
queenly physique alone had forced "the
boys" into yielding her a certain amount
of respect which few of the married wo
men around her could command.
The fact that Jen was illiterate mattered
very little at the mine, where none beside
the Superintendent and the time-keeper
were supposed to have any require
ments for, or interest in, pens, ink, and
paper—whether printed paper or other
wise. So judged by men (and women,
too,) who passed judgment on themselves
according to the quantity and quality of
sinew and muscle —men who knew no
more of soul aud luiiul than they did of
Greek verbs and trigenometry—Jen Saxton
was well uign as perfect as goddesses are.
or should be.
Some people would undoubtedly have
called the girl coarse, but then one might
as well call a lion or a panther coarse.
Men do not measure the actions of wild
animals by the same standards which they
apply to rational human beings, and Jen
Saxton was of precisely the same nature
as wild animals. Always when there was
a light or a scullle(aiid they were frequent)
Jcu could be found, an eager and intensely
interested spectator. The fiercer the quarrel
the more she enjoyed the excitement. It mat
tered little to her whether game cocks, dogs,
boys, men or women fought; and, if human
beings, she was equally indifferent a: to the
mode of warfare—though she perhaps pre
ferred old-fashioned "bar.; knuckles'' to
k nivc:. or picks, as tending to prolong the
battle. She would lieyer interfere in a
"scrap" herself, and was invariably disap
pointed if unyone else undertook to part
the combatants. Womanlike, her sympa
thies always went, with the victor.
Perhaps the individual most cordially
disliked liy the miners at Dent Sear was a
huge and powerful Englishman called the
Hullock, the nickname being shorter, more
appropriate, aud more euphonious than
that which appeared on the company's
pay-roll—Elislm Evan..
Tho Hullock was an enormous two leg
ged brufe —a monster six feet three inches
in height, who carried about with him
nearly two hundred pounds avoirdupois of
mastodon bone and cast-iron muscle, llis
low forehead, knit eyebrows, and heavy
jaws, proclaimed him at once a man i»f
brutal passions and a bully. And this was
the only man at the mine whom Jen Sax
ton admired to any degree; the only man
who could have made the handsome girl
his wife for the asking!
Why*
Simply because, in a community which
was materialistic to such a degree that
sentiment and intellect counted for actual
ly nothing, the liullock stood head and
shoulders above his fellows. Jen Saxton
only comprehended that ho was the grand
est specimen of a man that had ever cross
ed her path; she could see and appreciate
liis massive frame and gigantic strength,
and, for that he had once, like Hercules,
felled an ox with his list and had thrashed
almost every miner iu the county, lie be
came Jen's ideal man—her idol.
Jen's admi ration for the liullock was
fully reciprocated by that worthy, though
as yet he had never given the girl any as
surance of the fact. It were a libel on the
tender passion to assert that Evans loved
Jen Saxton. Vet he almost worshiped the
girl with a species of slow, dogged allec
tion that was none the less iuteusc and
determined because it was not outspoken.
He rather enjoyed the secret feeling of
security which he cherished within him
self. He felt so sure of his prey aud knew
so well that he could net his bird at any
time. .
Men outside the narrow world immedi
ately contiguous to the Dent £car mine
were unknown quantities in the Bullock's
calculations, and were possibilities which
never entered into Jen Saxton's day
dreams—it that young woman ever indulg
ed in such airy and intangible luxuries.
The Dent Scar miners earned large wages
and, as pay-day came round only once ,i
month, many of the men drew consider
able sums of money every time the com
pany's paymaster visited the mine. On a
certain pay day the Bullock left Dent Scar.
No one attached much importance to that
fact, however. He had probably gone to
Tyrone, or Johnstown, or perhaps fo Pitts
burg, as he had olten done in the past.
He would return when his stock of money
became exhausted.
He had been absent two days when a
young engineer visited the mine. .Arch
ibald Allan was a mining expert and had I
BI'TLF.R. PA.. FRIDAY . JAN I ARY . !*»0
! lieen sent to Dent Scar by the mining
company for the purpo.-e of rejioning on
the best method of making a pri.po-ed ex
-1 tension. Allan was a well-bred young
! fellow; he v. a> alxi lairlv educated and
had traveled much. la appearance .ie wa
oßly of a* erage U< quit* alcndi r.
1 while his years perhajw* uttmbered '_s. Any
one of the millers could have thrashed him
in forty-five >ceouds. more or less. Con
M-queutly. although h«- »;i, clever at hi"
! profession as well as pleasant in manner
and entertaining in conversation, Archie
Allen cut only a very small figure with the
Dent Scar people. Strangely enough,how
evei, Allan not only lost his heart to Jen
Saxton, but (which was really far more re
markable) that devotee at. the shrine of
1 brute force fell in love with the interesting
! young engineer.
At all events, in a few weeks, they were
j married by an iupccnnious justice of the
peace, ir.d shortly afterwards Mr. anu Mr.-.
Allan started to leave the Western
| Aileghcnies.
That same day, the liullock, tired of his
1 prolonged jtjmboree, was on his way. afoot,
i from Tyrone to Dent Scar.
Most men after a month's '-tear" are
| physical and mental wrecks; but such was
not the case with the liullock. The only
effect his spree had wrought upon hiui
was temporary financial embarrassment
and of course, a consequent fit of extraor
dinary ill nature, lie was strong as ever
and just as confident in his own bullj ing
powers.
lie saw the couple driving towards him
in the rig which Allan had hired aud, while
thev were yet several hundred yards dis
tant, became aware that the woman was
Jen Saxton. He also perceived that the
man was. to hiui a stranger. Kvideutly
i the liullock -moiled a mouse, or, po ibly,
I merely objected lo Jen riding with a man
' wlio wa - not known to himself. AI any
j rate he stopped the horse and, utterly
| ignoring Allan, accosted the girl in broad
j North of England dialed.
"Where goiu'. lass?"
.1 oil, who was fully conscious of tho
bully's unspoken admiration and perhaps
affection for herself, and who rightly
estimated the frightful possibilities of such
a nature as his when he should learn the
truth. >.aid nothing. She shuddered, and
the shudder was perceptible both to tin
liullock and to Allan. The latter became
impatient; indeed he was hardly the man
to brook interference from such as fellow
as Evans without resentment.
"Stand aside, my man," lie said. "My
| wife and I have no time to lose."
••Thy wife? Jei: Saxton thy wife' Be'st
that so, .lent"
The girl nodded her head in silence,
while Allan added:
"It seems to me that this is none of your
concern."'
The Hulloek's face was white with sup
pressed murderous passion. He felt that
he had been euchred out of what he bad
hitherto deemed as surely his own as
though every legal form and religious rite
bad bound Jen Saxton to him.
"Ah, lad," he said with a queer, low,
savage laugh, "Tha tliiliks because Jen
said 'yes' aud because t' squire did tli" old
trick, that it's all right and none o' my
concern. Se<* tha, my lad, thou's gotten
to ask me. Do tha understand? Me! An 1
the only way to get my consent is to lick
luc. See tha? Whip me —knock me out—
\ kill uic! Tumble out. now. and see if
thou's to keep the lass.'
Allan saw that the giant meant mischief,
so he attempted to start the horse. Hut
Evans had unbuckled the reins from the
bit, and the animal stood qnito still. As
for Jen, like an old war-horse that smells
powder, her eyes Hashed, her nostrils
dilated, and clinched her fingers tightly at
the prospect of a tight—a light in which
her old favorite, the Hullock, would un
doubtedly utterly annihilate his opponent.
The fact that such opponent was the man
whom she had just married counted for
nothing now that her old wild nature as
serted itself, strong as ever. She was
eager to behold the fray and said never a
word of encouragement to Allan nor utter
ed the faintest rememoustrance to Evans.
Archie Allan was no coward, though lie
knew full well that his chance.: were small,
indeed, in a contest with the liullock. So
when the latter, taking one end of the
reins, brutally struck the heavy strap
across the young man's face, Allan, spring
iug from the buggy planted his fist iu
Kvaii:.' face. Then the battle began—and
ended. Two blows from the liullock. one
on the mouth and one on the temple, laid
the young engineer on the wayside, appar
cutly lifeless. A-a matter of fact he was
only stunned, though Jen and the liullock
thought him dead.
Evans, to whom the exertion of knock
ing Allan insensible had been the merest
trifle, now turned his attention to Jen.
Different phases of passion were surging
through both the man and the woman.
The Hullock, though outwardly calm, was
filled with an exulting and demonical souse
of triumph and absolute possession. Jen
was fearfully excited—trembling with pas
sionate admiration for the brute who had
thrashed (killed she thought) her husband.
It was a curious couple—a couple that
would at that moment have furnished an
interesting pyschologiclil study.
The girl had descended from the gig
when Allan sprang out of the vehicle to
grapple with Evans. The Hullock now
took a couple of steps toward her and stood
with his cold, brutal eyes glaring into hers,
which sparkled with unusual brilliancy.
•'Dost Ilia want hint now?" asked flic
man.
For a moment Jen glanced at the still
and prostrate form of Allau and, as she
did so, a slight shudder passed through her
majestic form. Only for a moment, and
then unabh- longer to control her feelings,
she threw her shapely arms around the
neck of her husband's murderer (as she
supposed) while she covered his rough un
shaven face with a torrent of wild hot
kisses.
"No, no, no! Lisha, I am yours—you
could always have had me for the asking.
Take me away from him and do anything
you've a mind to with me."
Even the rough brute was momentarily
moved aud. as his gray eyes lighted a little
with supreme satisfaction at the girl's con
fession, he passed one arm around her
waist, and together they walked away.
No one ever saw tin; Hullock and Jan
Saxton any more.
The place where this strange encounter
took place was about tw.» miles from the
Dent Scar mine. A year afterward Archie
Allan was again iu Westmoreland County,
working at a contemplated mine extension.
He proposed utilizing an old shaft which
was quite close to tho spot where he had
been left lor dead —a shalt which had been
sunk for some years previous and abandon
ed. It was nearly two hundred feet deep
and. when Allan descended to commence
his investigations, he found the skeletons
of two persons; one was covered by the
clothing in which Evans was la-1 seen, and
the other was wrapped in the dress worn
by Jen Saxton on her wedding day
- -The Virginia Legislature i wrestling
with a bill to permit women fo practise
law. Just as if she didn't lay down the
law* every day —and practice it
A Mathematician.
Sam .Summer . the negro prodigy, wa
iu town recently, and, as usual, entertain- '
ed a large crowd, who were testing him
with all kinds of mathematical problems.
Summer.-, is a negro a 4 _\ear> old, wiiiiout
the slighte-t education. He cannot re.nl
or w rite-, ami does not know one figure
from another, lie is it common farm huiul,
and to look at him and watch hi* .letioiis
he seems to IKS about halfwitted, loil hi.
quick and invariably correct answer to any
example iu arithmetic, no matter how dif
ficult. is simply wonderful. With the •
; hundreds of tests that he wa., submitted
to, not a single time ha» he failed to give !
the correct answer in every instance.
Some examples given him w ere as fol
laws: How much gold can be bought for
I in greenbacks if gold is worth il.iio?
! Multiply 597,312 by lJi. If a grain of
wheat produces seven grain ■. and these be
• sown the second year, each yielding the '
: same increase, how many bushels w ill be >
| produced at this rate in twelve years if ;
I 1,000 grains make a pint? If the velocity I
! of sound is 1.142 feet per second, the pnl
j Ration of the heart seventy per minute, j
| after seeing a flash of lightning there are ,
! twenty pulsations counted before you hear
: the. thunder, what distance is the cloud
from the earth, and what is the time after
j seeing the fla.-h of lightning until you hear ;
j the t.milder? A commission merchant
j received seventy bags of wheat, each con
| taming three bushels three pecks and
j three quarts. How many bushels did he
| receive? Aud so on.
With Robinson'., Ray aud othci higher
I arithmetics before them, tho.ie who have
; tested him as yet have been unable lo lied
any example that with a few moment's
i thought on his part he is not able to cor
| recti v an. wer. —Louisrillt ' omun it itil.
''Grounds" For Divorce.
I'eoplehavelaughed at the play in which
; the silly wife, who was applying for a di
: vorce, stated to her attorney, that her uiou- |
j -ter of a husband had called her a "goose.'' |
She could not even show that ho had qual- !
itied the term in any way; the only thing
she could charge him with was that he had
called her "just a plain, simple goose." Of
course, that was a burlesque, but it seems '
seems that divorces arc actually asked
upon fully as flimsy charges as that of call
ing a woman a goose. Some ludicrous j
reasons for asking separation are given iu
Commissioner Wright's report on marriage
and divorce. In one of these defendant
made plaintiff climb a ladder to drive nails j
iu the woodshed: not liking the way she j
drove the nails he lassoed her oil coming j
down from the ladder, tied her fast to the
gate post, then stuck sticks and straws in ,
her nose and ears, gouged his knuckles iu j
her eyes and said he "wanted fo ; ce if she
was Dutch.'' On untying her he threw or
shoved her into a liest of bees, all of which
sorely grieved the plaintiff in body and
inind.
Such an experience ol the sweets of
wedded life constrained her lo ask to lie i
free.
This was in . nother application: "De- |
feudarit struck plaintiff a violent blow with j
herJiiistle." She evidently thought he was j
not struck ou her shape and she deter- i
mined to try an improvement upon him.
"My husband," complained another j
suffering wife, "would never cut his toe j
liar's and I was scratched very severely
every night, especially as he was very
restless." Such a combination of causes
ought to have secured her a prompt "bill"
for her lacerated feelings and shins. Such
a heartless rooster as that defendant,
should follow "Mcdinty lo the bottom of
the say," as he is only lit to live with mer
maids.
llowuver. if all the married people with
either real or fancied grievances, should I
apply for divorce, there Would hardly be a j
single married couple left.
How lo Toll the Ages of Stran
gers.
"(live me a list of the names of the men j
in any city or town in this country and j
without having seen or heard of them, 1 j
w ill tell you half their ages," said a prom j
inent citizen yesterday.
"How can you do that'" asked an in
credulous bystander.
"Simply by the initials of their names.
In the first place you must remember that
about half of the male population of this
country have been named after Presidents
of the I nitcil States or candidates for
President, and all you have to do is to
kno v whi-ii the e Presidential candidates
were at the zenith of their popularity. Of
course exceptions must he made id* i'ieorge
Washington and Andrew Jack on, for peo
ple have not quit naming their boy after
these illustrious men to this day."
"For instance, here is the name ol W. 11.
John-oii —William llenry Harrison was
elected President iu ISIJti, consequently
Mr. Johnson is about fifty-three years old.
Here is W. Scott Smith —Winfield Scott
ran for President iu 1 H.TJ. Smith is there
fore about thirty seven years old. The
next name on the list is A. 1. North
Abraham Lincoln was elected President
in 1 SCO. Mr. North is therefore about
twenty-eight years of age. Now take the
next—M. F. Sinathers, Milliard Filinoro
was a candidate for President iu 18fiti. M.
F. Smathers is therefore, in all probability
about thirty-three years old. And so on.
l!y studying the Christian names of men
you can figure out the ages of many of
them very closely."
Ho Reads Upside Down.
A Puuxsutawuey youth possesses the 1
peculiar faculty of reading newspapers up
side down quite as readily as otherwise.
Indeed, he prefers to read that way, and '
almost invariably inverts the piper and
reads upward instead of downwards. The '
peculiarity was after this fashion bequeath 1
ed him: When a small boy he loved not 1
the atmosphere of the school room, ami 1
fain would stay at home. Hut he had a
desire unto knowledge, and from the news- j 1
papers with which the walls of his bed I
room were papered he learned to spell and 1
read. Many of these papers were pasted
on upside down, and by reading from the
bottom upward he became familiar with :
inverted print. Now he reads as readily as j
any ouo, aud it may be said that all his
education was gleaned from the newspapers 1
on the walls.
The Best Chocolate.
A Senator's wife who is said to serve the
best chocolate iu Washington gave the fol
lowing recipe to Miss Edith Ingalls: Three
quarters of a cuke of chocolate, one quart,
of cold water, one quart of sweet, rich 1
milk; sugar to taste. Orate or scrape the 1
chocolate and mix with the water thor- '
oughly and smoothly; then sweeten and
allow to boil until it is quite a thick paste- 1
Roil the utilk separately and stir it into the j 1
chocolate mixture and cook a few minutes : 1
longer. j
—After air there Is a vast amount of j
comfort to bo taken out of growing old ; ,
when one has passed the point of desiring
to do foolish things.
—Cartium has (pent $200,000 for udvor j
tiding in Loudon, lieuce hi success
Hero's a hint to the merchant who doe-n't
advertise. 0
Know Something.
Dr. Holme, s.• a Will educated mail
' is one who knows "i very tiling about ■uac
| thing, and MUIII thing about everything.'
! The wise iloet, r <toM Well to p.;!t this in
the order lie docs; lor the man aho li. jiiu*
at one thing and learns all about i:. Iw;f'y>*
he tries to ma: ter everything el. c. i the
man "f power and consequent! iu this
world, while th. one wl o dabbles a little
in everything get* left far behind in the
ran'. Mi. S'urdctte put- the idea very
neatly iu the following paragraph:
• Mr Vanderbilt pays his cook ilO.OOfl
a year, my boy, which is a great deal
more than yon and 1 earn, or at least it i-.
a irreat deal more than we get. because he
is a cook. That is all Presumably be
cause he can cook better than any other
man in America, Tl.at i< all. If Hons.
1 Sam eaugravi could cook tolerably well
: and shoot a little, and speak three lan
guages tolerably well, and keep books
fairly, and siug -ome. and could preach a
fair >ort of a sermon, ami knew something
I about hor-es, and could telegraph a little.
and do light porter's work, and could read
i proof toleiably, could do plain house and
sign painting, and eonlil help on a thresh
; ing machine, and knew enough law to
practice in the Justices' courts of ICicka
poo township, and had once run for the
j legislature, and knew how to weigh liai,
he would'nt get #IO.(MY) a year for it. lie
| gets that just because he knows how to
cook, and it would'ut make a cent's differ
ence in his salary if he thought tin- world
was flat, and it went around il orbit on
wheels. —There is nothing like knowing
your business clear through, my boy,
whether you know anything else or not
What Produces Death.
Some one say* that few men die of age.
Almost all persons die of disappointment,
personal, mental.or bodily toil or accident.
The passion- kill liicii sometimes even
suddenly. The common expression,
I "choked with passion," haa little exagger
! at ion in it, for even thought not suddenly
fatal, strong pa-sinns shorten life. Strong
! bodied men often die young—weak men
live longer than the strong, for the strong
use their strength, and ih.- weak have none
1 to use. The latter take care ofAliei.,selves,
Hie former do not. As it is with the body,
so it. is with mind aud temper. The
strong are apt to break, or.like the candle,
run: the weak burn out. The Inferior ani
mals. which live temperate lives, have
generally their prescribed term of years,
i The horse lives 25 years, the ox l."i or 'JO,
j the lion about L'o, the hog 10 or ll!, the
rabbit Sy the guinea pig »'• or 7. The num
bers all bear proportion to the. time the
animal takes to grow its fn'l -i/c. Hut
: man. of all animals, is one that, seldom
i comes up lo the average. He ought lo
i live a hundred years, according the
physiological law, for five times twenty
! are one hundred: but instead of lhaf, he
scarcely reaches an average of four times
the growing period. llie reason is
1 obvious—man is not only the most irregu
lar and most intemperate, but the most
laborious and hard working of all animals.
He is always the most irritable of all
j animals, and there is reason to believe,
■ though wo cannot tell what an animal
secretly feels, that, more than any other
j animal, man cherishes wrath to keep it
j warm, and consumes himself with Hie fire
: of his own reflections.
Bill Nye's Whittled Desk.
Certain school boys in llutler who have
whittled their desks anil been compelled
by the School Hoard to pay damages for
the work of their jacket-knives may find
comfort and a pointer or two in Hill Nye's
experience. In his lecture at Pittsburg
lately he gave fliis reminiscence of his
! schoolboy days;
I One rule of the village school was that if
I any article of the schoolhotise furniture
• was mutilated a fine of s."> would he im
! posed oil the offender. Ono day. while
j thinking of tho tariff, he said, he whittled
the desk, lie was given his choice be
tween paying a lin« or taking a whipping.
J He said he didn't have the cash with him.
hut when lie went home that night he told
his father about it, and put the case to him
very strongly, and asked him for tin- loan
of the necessary money.
His father, he said, was not inclined to ;
become a broker, and said that he could
stand a good deal of corporal punishment
taken iu the proposed way. The lather
wa finally persuaded, nfier exacting a
promise that it would be Hie la t offense,
to furnish the
On the way to school the next morning
Nye said lie thought over the matter care
I ally and prayerfully and concluded that
*r» wa too large a sum of money to fritter
away on a cliool district thai had never
done anything special for him,and so when
lie got there lie took the whipping—and re
taiued the !f">. It was, lie said, the tirst. J
money he ever honestly earned ami with j
it lie went to the circus with a portion j
and bought arnica with tho remainder, i
The Wolf, llie Lynx, and Hie
Wild-Gal.
One day, ihc three animals named above .'
met in the forest, and the day being picas
ant and all feeling good-natured, the sub
jeet of a more fraternal feeling among
them was soon introduced.
"There is no earthly reason why we
should not even hunt in company and di
vide Ihc spoils." said the Wolf as lie comb
ed his whiskers with a burr.
"Nouc at all," said tho Lynx. "1 go
iu for a Trust, or. at least, for Co-Opera
tion."
"Gentlemen," said tho Wild Cat, "1 am
with yon heart and hand iu whatever you
do."
Alter considerable discussion it was de
eided to go on a hunt iu company. They
soon cauie to the trail of a Man, and while
the Wolf was for making pursuit the oth
ers objected. The next trail was that of
a hare, and while the Cat and Lynx were
eager to pursue, the Wolf wiiuld not move,
alius it went, until, us the three were fin
ally ready for a fight, the Wolf sat down
aud said:
"See here, (ients —we have simply made
a mistake. While we belong to tho same
species iu a general way, our palate.- were
built on a different principle, and Nature
never intended us to hunt together; each
will go his way and please himself."
UOBAI.
The housewife won't admit tlieie is any.
If one child likes Bean Soup all must cat i
it or take a licking.
—M others and nurses should always re- j
member that disappointment never attends j '
the use of Dr. Hull's Baby Syrup. Price j
only -•» cents a bottle.
The close sympathy existing between i
Ihc stomach and the brain is noticeably :
exhibited in the headache resulting from j
indigestion. Laxador always cures head
ache, when caused by indigestion.
Don't growl af this world until you are j
sure of a better one.
Everything that is nice in this world j
grows on the other side of a barbed wire |
fence.
The devil it credited with a great ileal j |
id mischief that the stomach is guilty ol (
Some Curious Wills.
i The St. l.oui /,'#*; nb'ir, -ome time ago.
:at a chapter nil v lis. llo*in_' tbc testa
lor- t<> lav<» |k> .<1 niiiMlt siugularlj
I COllSlitll'ed.
»' .<ll ,j -tied is lur l> ;::;i ,'i, ,le Will I*l
ot Mi iliurJ, iliiw, whi
• ilii il ulntct fifteen years Sauburu was a
(.i .it pa!rioi, aud specially gloried iu the
part Ma-sat htisetls took iu lb. revolution
ary struggle fu hi* will In- li ft l.i Imml.v
to I»r. Oliver Wendell Holme* and Prof.
Agassir. not. however. without imposing
suiue of the most tinhear I of provision*
and conditions. His skeleton he di-sired
prepared in the umst artistic manner kin.wu
to the profession, ai.d placed with the
many others in the anatomical department
of Harvard College. While preliminary
preparations were beinir made in carrying
out this extraordinary request, he desired
the surgeons to he very < areful with the
skin wi that it could be tanned in pieces if
: sufficient Hire to make a pair of drumhead.
' L'pon one of these drumhead* the "Dec
laration of independence" was to lie writ
tin. and upon the otter Pop«*'s I'nirental
Prayer." l ilted in its proper wooden
' frame thi> <tisily relic was to he present
ed lo a local ilr'ifiiaier, whom the testator
; designates a "distinguished friend." upon
condition that he would promise to carry
i it to the loot of Hunker Hill monument oa
each succeeding anniversary of tbe battle,
at nunri.se. and beat upon it the invigora
ting strains of "Yankee Doolie."
The skeleton of Jeremy Hentham. iu the
Hospital Museum. London, is there at tbe
leque i of its o* jer, who made a special
provision in his will lo Intro it presented to
the curators of the hospital, who, upon ac
eepting th > gift. were lo have the skeleton
mounted and put iu the presidential chair
at each meeting of the hospital directors.
I'r. Wagner, an .\mericau. is up to or
even ahead-of the English preeeilent iu the
di membcriuciit idea. Daring his life bis
relatives had given hint but little thought.
When it cauie lor hiui lo die—he had a
little money, about sl.ooo—his brothers
became very kind. Alter bis death, when
tho will was read, the following remark
. able clause Was dist Insed:
•To mv brother, Napoleon Bonaparte. 1
bequeath my left arm and baud: to <!corge
' Wa-hington, my second brother, my right
, , arm ami hand: to my other relatives iny
i legs, nose and ear . My money. SI,OOO
cash. now iu the 11 Hank, 1 bequeath
to the physicians and surgeons who carry
i out my request by dismembering my body
i ami giving to each of my relatives the por
. ; tion allotted to him or her."
Horatio ti. ondcrdonk. n brother of the
, ; bishop of New York, made provisions* iu
| his will whieli would hare turned old
Draco green with envy. Hraco was strict,
, i.ud well understood the meaning of the
, expre -sion "ruling with a rod of iron;" but
had Mr. Ondcrdonk lived at the time the
old man was preparing his famous code,
lie could have helped to make il more bind
ing. The last paragraph in the Ondcrdouk
I w ill read as follows:
"Nu heir must bo au idler, .sluggard,
; profligate, drunkard, gambler; use liquor
; or tobacco; go hunting or tishiug on Sun
days; attend races; enter a barroom or por
-1 ter house, lie; Vet to rise, breakfast, and
be ready for businc s by 0 o'clock; or get
married before he or she arrives at the age
i of 2.1 years."
fioodncss "Wears Well."
I jvc or »i.t young ladies, near relatives,
begad their matrimonial life about the
same time, llappci ing to meet, ttuo day,
after having been married about ten years.
j they compared notes, and talked about
their husbands. A lawyer's wife spoke
• wit h pride of the brilliant success her bus
band had won at tbu bar. Another lady
professed herself satisfied with the luiur
ions home which birr husband, a largo
manufacturer, had provided for his family.
A third, whose husband stood well oil
'change anil in society, said she wouldn't
i exchange places any of them. She
had everything say wished for, and tbe
•In- t people visited lier." The conversa
tion flowed on in this strain until one of
the party exclaimed—"Why, Molly, you
haven't said one word ul.ont your husband!
Ito tell us something. We all know you
were not much in love with him when you
married him." "Hut lam now," answer
| ed promptly the lady, who had listened iu
| silence. "You all know that William is
j neither brilliant nor rich, but 1 know that
! he is good; and the longer I live the more
' I value simple gooducss, especially in tbe
' man you live w ith. We are not even well
■ to-do . William has not added a penny to
• hi fortune: but though we have had a
j hard struggle, wo have enough, anil our
home is the iinnicst in the county. Dur
ing our whole married life, my husband
! has not spoken one harsh word to. nor has
i he caused me a moment's anxiety, and he
| has been as good as he could bo all the
I time." Her hearers lapsed into silence.
1 and kepi their eyes on their fancy work.
■ T:te husband • of several of them were not
amiable, nor were their habits such as
their wives cared to speak about, even to
confidential friend ''Molly has capped us
; all!" exclaimed one at lasl, throwing down
her work. "Take it day in and day out.,
goodness i, better than smartness to live
with. We'd all of us rather wear a real
diamond, even if it is a little oil' colour,
than a paste one. William may be a little
opaque, but he is good and wears well."
The Economites.
There are now but about thirty members
of ilie organization left iu tho quaint little
town of Economy, and they are well ail
vaueed in years.
For a long time the rule forbidding the
marriage of members lias been strictly en
forced, and time lias .so reduced their num
bers that the question of disposing of the
many millions of dollars of property which
the organization Las accumulated, and of
perpetuating the society itself, is becoming
daily more important.
At the opening of the coming year a
dozen new members will be admitted to
tho society. Several of these arc married.
About the same time the proposition to
raise the ban so long placed upon the
marriage rite will lie considered. It is
learned that a majority of the present
members favor the idea, and it is likely the
change will be made.
Tbe society lives in the town of Econ
omy on tbe banks of tbe Ohio, and has be
come celebrated for the frugality of its
members, its enormous wealth, quaint
homes and good citizens. Jacob Hcnrici,
its leading spirit, i.» a white haired pa
triarchal man past SO years When ques
tioned ax to the proposed change, he said
ti.at celibacy was a part of their religion:
and would remain so.
—An uuruly stomach is not to be lamed
with lecture .
It discourages a young mustache lo
be called down.
II takes a good deal of and to perpe
tratc some iif ar fraud -
The jrirl who has the strongest will i j
the girl who says the trongcit won't
Tbc reason why l.ve ate Ibe apple was
probably lice nil e he wanted to git some
clothes.
Abe Skinned Him.
Ifl can tree thin case from t<*ehnical
l ti, . and gi tit properly sxruug to tbe jury,
y I'll ".a it. Abraham Liucu'u iisod to say,
when i iiifnlent of the justice of tbe cause
,1 i lie represented. lie Wits weak ill defond
ii i ing ft wrong cause, for ho was mentally
a J and morally too hoiuutt to explain away
c the bad points of cause b\ ingenious
-opkistry.
i Is lead ni' attempting to Ixd.tei up *uch
f. ' a cairn*, be abandoned it Onto he rvbrm
jr ! ,loii,'d a iae iii open court, being COtt
< ' vii:e,*d that i' was unju-t A fastidi
d ' otts lawyer look Mr. Lincoln's place and
[1 ' Won the I asC.
c ' Mr. llcrudon, iu bi.s "Life of Lincoln."
t | tolls a story which exhibits his ability ill
i- ' getting a ease be believed in "properly
■z ' swung to tbe jury."
1 1 A pension agent, iiaiuod Wright, secured
c- for the widow of a Uevolutiouary soldier a
'' pension of SWO, of which sum he retained
! one bail" as hi- fee. The pensioner, a crip
i pled old woman, bubbled into Lincoln'*
otlicc and told her story. It stirred Lincoln
I up; lie brought syii against the agent and
I on tho day of the trial he said
"! am going to skill Wright, and uet
! that money hack.''
i He did -o The old Woman told her
j story to the juiy. Liucolu in hi - plea drew
: a picture of the hardships of Valley l-'orge.
! described the wddior- as creeping bare
' footed over the ice. and marking their
tracks by their bleeding feet. Then he
e contrasted tbe hanlsliip of the soblicri en
e ilured for their country with the hardt ucd
,1 ac tion of the agent in tleeciiig the old
j woman of one-half of her pension.
lie wa> merciless; the members of the
i jury were in tears, and the agent writhed
r in bis seat under the <astigation of l.in
coln's denunciation. Tbc jury returned a
r verdict in her favor for the full amount.and
(. Lincoln made no charge for his ervice
His notes for the argument were unique:
"No contract.-—Not profossiou.il ser
a viic :.- I'ureasouahlc charge.— Money re
j, taincd by Deft not given by 1'1'tl" Kevo
a lutionary War.- Describe Valley forge
privatious.—lce Soldiers'bleeding feet.—
Pill's husband. Soldier leaving for
1 army.—Skin Deft. —Close."
A Moral Lesson in it.
t
y It was agreed by everybody in the car
l> that -be was the hoiuliesi woman they
li ever saw, and the man iu tbe seal w'uU hei
y probably noticed tbe sly glances and lioanl
y some of the whispered oxclainatiou- lie
- became restless anil uneasy, and by and by
got up and walked liack to where a couple
a of drummers sat, and said:
a "Boys, she's my wife."
i "Yes!'' responded oue.
, "I allow that sho's homely 'null to scare
a hungry bear out of a bog peu but it s all
my fault."
"Indeed!"
"And I'll tell you tbe story, because
there is a great moral iu it We was cu
lt gaged to be married. I took her into S_, r
aeu.se to a Fourth of July. There she met
, Hill Prime, au old liean of hers, and to
r make jealous, as some gals will, jon know.
- she agreed lo ride home with him. It hit
■- me hard, as you may believe, aud so 1
d went out to the stablo and drove tacks in
t to Hill's harness. When I hey camo to
e start out the horse ran away. Hill jumpo l
out and didn't eret a scratch, but Main
stayed in till tbe buggy strnck a bridge
and was smashed up. She lost twelve
teeth, had her nose broken, her month
torn out at the corner, an eye cocked up.
her toes turned iu. her tougne bit half in
two, and the color of her hair changed to
the brindlc you now see before you.''
"We see tho lesson."
"Not yit, you don't! That came iu when
I tried to give her tbe shake aud crawl out
of tbe marriage. Hor old dad pnt on the
screws, and 1 bad to conic to time or lose
my farm, and so 1 walked chalk. The
g.cat moral lesson is, never get mad Rt
your best gal. If you do get mod don't,
make a fule of yourself. That's all, boys,
and 1 hope tbe warning will sink deep into
yer hearts."
The Tuneful Maid.
There is a family living on Ditflicld street
who have a singing domestic—a hired girl
who washes the dishes to the tunc of "Sil
ver Hairs Among the Gold," aud scrubs
tbe pantry with air of "Johnnie Get Your
Gun." Her mistress has suggested to her
several times that she would accomplish
more if she sung less, and the neighbors
sent in a petition a yard long asking to
have her removed but it didn't do a bit of
good. Sing she would,and sing she should
and did, until she met with her fate.
Yesterday afternoon she was siting with
her back to the window denning the fanii
ly silver aud singing, with lier voice aw ay
up to concert pitch. "There's a Land that
is l'airer Than Day," when suddenly a rich
baritone voice at the window took up tbe
refrain. "In the sweet by and-by" and con
tinued to carry the air with her. She
wasn't going to sing in a strange {choir in
that fashion and she turned to see who
the accompanist was. There stowl a nice
looking strango young man.
"Excuse me, miss, 1 ' bo auid, "but you
do sing so beautifully 1 could not help
stopping to listen. You are a professional
musician 1 presume, miss?"
"Oh, no," simpered the girl. "1 unK
sing to amuse myself."
"Is it possible? Might I trouble you for
a drink of water, miss."
"Xo trouble at all," said the girl, and
she went into the pantry for a glass aud
then to tbe ice-tank in the next room for
the water.
When she returned the singer was gone.
So was the basket of family silver. The
police bare it in baud, but it is doubtful if
they see it again until the "Sweet by and
by."
One of Hersehel's Problems.
In her "Hciuinisccueos of tbe Herschels"
lu tho Century J lagarine, the late Prof.
Maiia Mitchell says: "Oue of Sir John
llerschel's numerical problens was this:
If, at tbe time of Cheops, three thousand
years ago, one pair of hnuian beings had
lived, and war, pestilence, nud famine had
not existed, and only natural death came
to man, and this pair had doubled every
thirty years, anil their children bad don
bled, and so on, how large would the pop
ulation of the world lie at this time—could
they stand upou tbe earth as a plane,'
"Wo xvrre sitting at tbe breakfast tab o
when lie asked tbe ijuestion. Mo thought
they could not. 'Cut if they stood closely
aud others stood on their shoulders, man,
woman and child, how many layers would
there be?' I said, 'Perhaps three.' How
many feet of men?' he asked. 'Possibly
thirty,' I 'aid. 'Ob. more!' 'Well, we'll
! .ay a hundred.' 'Oh, more!' Miss Ilcr
schcl said, 'Enough to reach to the moon.'
•To the nil.' Mor«, more!' cried Sir John,
exulting iu our astonishment; 'bid higher."
To Neptune,'said oue. 'Sow you burn,
be replied. • Title « hundred times the
ilnlonet ofXepltt tie, audit <& rtry w<<"
That is my way,' said he, *of whitewashing
war. pestilence, aud famine.' "
A I'icsuo, Cal., Woman threw a cellu
loid cull'in tho stove. Her husband Trill
have to pay *l5O to repair damage douc to
the kitchen aud to get u ucw Stove.
YOO