VOL. XXIV. Administrators' Notice. ESTATE OF R. M. HARBISON. DKC'D. Whereas letters of administration have been bison, late ot buffalo twp BuU «. P ,''" oil nfiNOQs who know tuGDißti\in debted to sSd estote will make Immediate payment, and those having same will present.UlFM properly authenticated tor settlement to tlie JOHN HARBISON! FBKKPOKT. r. 0., PA. Administrators. EBTATK OK CHRISTOPHER MrMICHAEL, LATE OF CLAY TOWNSHIP, DEC'D. Letters testamentary on the estate of Christopher McMichael, dec d, late of t lay township, Butlet county, Pa., having been granted to the undersigned. All persons knowing themselves indebted to said estate, will please make immediate payment, ana any having claims against said estate, will present them duly authenticated tor settle ment. JAPIIIA McMICHAEL, EX'r, EUCLID P. 0., Bntler Co. Pa. Executors' i.ptr»»rs testamentary having been grunted to „ Tll nn ,« havtnsr claims against said cs tate will present the same properly authentlcat edfor settlement, hks9ELGESS ER.> DAVID HESSELCJESSER.) E xr _ 8, April is, 'B7. Leasurevtlle, Butler Co.. Pa. Notice in Insolvency. In the matter of the application of Perry Bricker for the benefit of the insolvent laws MSD No. 1, March T. 1887, of the Court of Common Pleas of Butler county, Penn a. Whereas, Perry Bricker, residing near sar ▼ersville, Buffalo township, said county, by occupation a farm laborer, did at the March Sessions of said court, urgent his peution asking for the benefit of the insolvent laws of this Commonwealth. And whereas, the said court made an order fixing the first Monday of June, A. p. 185/, at the Court House in Butler as the time and vlace for hearing said application. Notice is hereby given that said hearing will then and there take place pursuant to said order, when all parties interested may attend if they see proper to so do. TBOMNOK, MCJUSKIN A GALBBEATH, Attorneys for Perry Bricker. Notice in Divorce. .Mary Battenfelder by her next friend Ch as A A Ohl vs. Conrad Battenfelder. In Common Pleas of Butler county, A. D 5». 29, Dec. Term 1886. To Conrad Battenfelder Respondent: The sobpuma and alias subjxena in the above stated ease having been regularly is sued and returned non «< you ar e hereby notified to appear at a Court of Com mon Pleas to be held at Butler in and for the tcounty of Butler, state of Pennsylvania on ithe first Monday of June next, to answer the or libel .May 3, 1887. Sheriff. TRUSTEE'S SALE BT virtue of an order of the Orphans' Court of Batler county, the undersigned trustee appointed by said court, will expose to public outer* ou the premises in BuHalo township, Butler Co., Pa., on TUESDAY, MAY 31, 1887, st one o'clock P. M , the following described real estate, being purport* No*. 2 Midl3_ in partition of real estate of Win. Fleming, •dec'd, to-wit: PURPART NO. 2. Bounded on the north by purpart No. one of Mid estate, on the east by lands of Chas. £lsenrath, dec'd, and Wm. B. Tucker, south by lands of Jno. Elliott and Jacob Simmers and west bv lands of Geo. and Jacob Sim men and Jno. Elliott, containing 69 acres. PURPART NO. 3. Bounded north by lands of James Flemings heirs, east by lands of Samuel H. Fleming, ■oath and west by purpart No. one of said estate, containing 4 acres and 120 perches. terms. One-third in hand on confirmation of sale by the court, balance in two equal annual installments with interest. Deferred pay ments to be secured by bond and mortgage. W. D. BRANDON, Butler Pa., May, 3,1887. Trustee. Notice. In the matter of the assignment of Thos, Ma tter to S. I'ercy Mcßea for the benefit of cred ll Court of Common Pleas of Butler Co., Pa., It's D. No 2, June Term, 1884. Notice Is hereUy given that 9. Percy McCrea, the above named assignee will make application to said court for discharge from his trust as as signee aforesaid on Monday the cth day of June, I»T, at two o'clock P, M. atßutlerPa.^ Att'y for S. P. McCrea. H RARE CHANCE L" FOR SALE. ONE OF Butler County's Best Farms Containing 130 Acres. All under * high state of cultivation; no waste land; under good fences, a large EIGHT-ROOM FRAME HOUSE, almost new, with cellar under the whole house, a large frame Nuik barn, 50x52, a three hundred dollar * pring house, and all other necessaiy outbuild ings. Excellent water. 30 ACRES OAK AND CHESTNUT TIMBER Good orchard. Choice fiuit of all kinds. Churches and schools convenient. This farm is located on the Unionvilie road in Franklin Township, one mile from Mt. Chestnut and five miles from Butler, and will be sold on easy terms. Immediate possession will be giveu Call on or address T. W. YOU NO, Mt. Chestnut, Pa. FARM FOR SALE In Sugarcreek township, Armstrong county, near Adams V. 0.. one and one-fourth wile east of the new otl develop ment In Sugarcreek tw-p. Farm contains 100 ACRES, with bank nam. 32x00 fee'; BRICK HOUSE, 18x80 feet, 2 stories, with cellar, frame kitchen, 14x16 feet; good spring of water, farm well wa tered, good orchard of grafted fruit. Farm In a good state of cultivation. About 75 ACRES CLEARED, balance In good timber. Will sell extremely low for cash. For particulars Inquire of J. ft. WICK, Rlmersburg. Clarion Co., Pa, FOR SALE OR EXCHANGE. FARM of 175 acres near R. R. station. 90acres improved land, convenient to Pittsburg ; barn Is IOOXGO aud cost s4soo—is good as new— a good • room frame house, good orchard. Price fsooo. MIGHT PAY ACASH DIFFTSRKNCH 011 & trade. We have small and large farms for tale or trade. Patent aud Pension cases prosecuted. Read the new pension laws and wTite to us J. H. STKVENSON'S & Co's Agency, 100 Fifth Ave., Pittsburg, Pa. m FOR SALE fHM, lill>,CMl LAd>, Etc.,la Wmtern Pemn ■yvaaia, hy W. J. KIBKABPON, Frreport, Fa. Every Monday in Freeport and every Tuesday at Pittsburgh. 129 Fifth Ave., 2d floor. Send lor printed list. "* may 28.84.1 y. iSwithin C. Shortlidge's Academy, Far Yavag Maa sad Bays, Madia, Pa. IS miles from Philadelphia. Fixed price covers •every expense, even books. &c. No extra ■charges. No Incidental expenses—No examina tion tor admission. Twelve experienced teach ers. all men and all graduates. Special oppor tunities for apt students to advance rapid, y. Special drill for dul and backward boys. Pa trons or students may select any studies or choose the regular English. Scientific, Business. Classical or Civil Engineering course. Students Bitted at Media Academy are now in Harvard, Tale, Princeton and ten other colleges and Polrtechnlo Schools, 10 students sent to col lege in 1888, 16 Ul 1884. 10 In 1886. 10 In 1884. A graduating class every year In the commercial department. A Physical and Chemical Laab xatory, Gymnasium and Ball Ground, isoo vols, added to Library In i(W3. Physical apparatus doubled In lass. Media has seven churches and a temperance charter which prohibits the sale ef all intoxicating drinks. For new Illustrated circular address the Principal and IToprletar. MWITHIH C. (tHOBTMIHJK, A, (Harvard Oradvate) Media, Pa. 8 «-W-ly THE BUTLER CITIZEN. A DRAMATIC SENSATION, | The Throbbirg, ThriHirg Cr.inja. Hs-x'.o' Save Money. I D. A. 1-IKCK, Author cf the "The Drlilo Won; or. Wliat a New , Suit of clothes Dt I," will be enacted ewtj tlav ami evening; durlnx the coming season at D. A. IIECKS GREAT CLOTHitiG EMPORIUM, So. 11, North Main St., Ilaffy't ltlork, j BDTLEK, - PA. Until further notice. Tills p>wert I work Is a wonderful and v.iriew i' d combln.nl> a ut tragical coined}'. 1 com: :al tragedy ana never r.ills u> la In,' dowtli« house. Tlie actors are all Stars. The costuming will be a strong feature. The following briefly outlined i.s t»iv? PROGRAMME: BONO—The heppy man no more reflects. Who buys his clothing at I). A. neck's ACT I,—SCENE 1 Time 9 a.m: Enter young man with friend. Voting man explains to his friend that the direct cause of his engage ment to the wealthy farmer's daughter was his purchase of >i n elegant su.t a! 1) HWK's <;r«\it clothing Emporium Friend tumbles to rli" Idea and is made happy with a new suit. Hat, Shirts. Collars '1 in, Underwear, (Jloves. Hose. Tr ink Yilt&e, I'mbrella, etc. Scene closes with song, joined In by the audience. SONG— The dav will be Intensely cold. When L». A. Heck is undersold, Ac. ACT II.— SCENE 2-Tlme 11 a.m. Kilter throng ol p-'ople, okl men. young mpn. ladles. elili clreu, managingmatronsw.tii m u i iaruble daughters. wiio with one accord fairly shriek wit li delight at tlx- wonderful l>ar gains shown. The beautiful. voting lady, Cinderella had* some Jeweiery, a pair of Corsets, a pair of Md Glows, an elegant pair of llose that set her off so exquisitely that a dude from I'nionviiie and a young man from Greece City botli propo&s.as the Greece Clfv man lias on one of J>. A. lit ik s lrrtslstabie suits. Cinderella decides to patronize home industries and accepts him. The I'nlouvilie dude talks of duels, suicides, etc.. but decides not to leave this world while he can get clothing so cheap at 1). A. HECK'S Great Emporium. Song by company, joined by audience: 'Tis our experlent'e. one and all. Mul e\ cry one v.ho tries It knows, That 1> A. HECK has got the call, And takes the town in selling clothes. ACT III.— SCENE 3. -Time ten }ears later: HECK'S LARGEST EMPORIUM. Ten years are supposed to liave elapsed. I). A! II lick's store quadrupled la Mze. Butler a metropolis. Arrival of several excursions, electric Irakis and a number ot balloon*, with crowds ol people to buy Clutlilny. Underwear. Hats, cap--. Collars, Neck Ties, Hosiery, Suspenders, Hamlkerclilefs. Umbrellas, Trunks Valises, Satchels, Bill and Pocketfcooks, Cloth, li.ilr and Tooth Brushes and innumerable other articles which space forbids to mention, scores of pros perous men and plump matrons gather around the proprietor, alt agreeing tiiat their rise in the world bexan from the mo ment they began to buy their goods from D. A. HECK, Cinderella and her husband about to de part fur Mt. Chestnut (tills is no chestnut) The Unlonville dude, a dude no longer but a rich business man in the city of Butler. I'opulatlon 10.000. noted clileliy for being the most enterprising city in the county, and for l.ilr dealing and for llie fact D. A. IIECK'S Emporium, Duffy's Block, is the headquarters tor good goods, fair dealing and low prices. AU will now join In singing:— How D. A. neck Is selling clothes, Way down at bed rock— Just watch the crowd that dally goes To IJ. A. Heck's in Duffy Block. Curtain falls to slow but sure music. SCOTT'S EMULSION OF PURE GOD LITER OIL And HypoptiosphHes of Lime & Soda Almost as Palatable as Milk. The only preparation of COD LITER OIL that can be taken readily and tolerated for a long time bj delicate stomachs. LYP AS A REMEDY FOU coysrMPTioir, AH EITIO.YS, ANAEMIA, GEN- HfclL bEBILITY, COUCJIIS AND THROAT AF FEOTIOMH, and all WASTING IHsOliPntS Pi? CHILDREN' it In marvellous in ItH n^nltg. Prescribed and endorsed by the best Physicians la the countries of the world. For Sale by *ll llraffiitn. for Pamphlet on Wast ina Diseases. Ad dress. SCOTT db UOWAE, Kew York. Tutt's Pills stimulate the torpid liver.fttrength* en the digestive organ!*, regulate the bowel*, and are unequaled us an anti-bilious medicine. In Malarial Districts their virtues are widely recognized, as they possess peculiar properties in freeing the system from that poi son. This popular remedy rarely rails to effectually enre Dyspepsia, Constipation, Sick Headache, Biliousness and all disorders arising from a Torpid Liver and Bad Digestion. A Proclamation! Dr. I. tiny I.ewls, Fulton, Ark., says: "A year ago I hud bilious fever; Tatt's Pills were so highly reccom mended that I used them. Never did medicine have a happier effect. Af ter a practice or 11 quarter of a cen tury, I proclaim them the best ANTI-BILIOUS medicine ever used. I always pre* scribe them in my practice." Sold Everywhere. Office, 44 Murray St. New York. Tuff's Manual of Useful Receipts sent Free. Sharp Pains! Backache, Bheumatlam, Crick, Spraina, Neural, gia. Stitches, Sciatica, Lame Side or Hip, Kidney Affections, Bore Chest or pain in any part, local deep-seated, quickly go when a Hop Plaster la applied. Prepared from Burgundy Pitch, Canaan Salaam and the medicinal virtues of fresh Hops. Act* instantly, cures quickly. The great est atrengtiiealxm plaster ever known. All ready to apply. Sold by druggist and country a tores, 25eta.. sforsl.oo, Vailed for price. Propria* tors, HOP PLASTER CO., Boston, Mass. Hop Plaster CATARRH ELY N S ■ P^fcj/>CURF<; coV ?I the rHWFEVERA)£ t&M Inflammation, S* Heals the sores S 3c4H Restores the 8881 Sansea of taste Smell .Hearing. A Relief. HAY-FEVER A positive cure \ particle is applied into each nostril anil is agreeable. Price so rents at Druggists ;by mail , «roistered. 00 cts. Cir mlars free, El.\ BROS- Druggists, Owego, X. V. ■■flWflfnH ure g-u&ranteod IMIIAHINTJ.S.S 1 ;,': at once. No operation or business delay. Thousands of euros. At Keystone House. Reading. Pa.. 2d Saturday ot each month. Send lor circulars. Advice ii eo. THREE LOAFERS. Three loafers stood out on the streets all day, And talked when they should Lave bean looking for work: The fruits of hard labor they gladly eat, But labor is a horror they shirk. For men will loaf and coiuplatn of hard times, Accusing the rich uicn ot all kinds of crimes, While the bright worid lies before theiu. Three wives stood over their washtubs grim, They washed and they scrubbed till the sun went down; Eacb thought of the vagrant who calledhhre r wife, And patiently struggled her sorrow to drown. For women must work and men must eat, And somebody must make both ends me: j t. And the laudiord calls in the morning. Three "drunks" lay out stiff in the station house — Lay there in their cells at the break of day. Three poor wives came down with their hard ger came to his door and asked for work. Walter took the young man into his house, questioned him, and then set him to work. The young man worked bard while in the field, and Walter was not long Jn finding him a valuable assistant. He gave his name as Jerry Black; claimed to be an orphan and to be well educated. He made a decided impression on the villagers and soon his society was in great demand. To all their attentions he was indifferent. He at last was forced to enter society, and, to the surprise of all, showed a decided preference for Annie Rose. That young miss was indifferent at first, but soon began to show unmis takable signs of a lively interest in Jerry. This puzzled the villagers while it set Jerry to thinking. Jerseyville was treated to more than one surprise that year A rob bery was committed one night early in August. Now a robbery was not a wonderful thing any where else in the broad world save in that hospital town. A farmer's bouse had been broken into and some fifty odd dollars taken. A meeting was held at which all the farmers and farm-hands attended. The most active man at the meeting was Jerry Black. He advised the men to band together, hunt the yillain down, and punish him severely. This suggestion was acted upon, and so popular bad Jerry become that he was chosen as their leader. While Walter Winter held no misgiving as to Black, yet, he determined to keep a close watch on both him and An nie. That very next night another bold robbery was committed, in which an old farmer was knocked senseless by a heavy blow and all his money taken. Jerry was the first one to learn of the affair and collected a body of men, scoured the country, but to no avail. The next night Walter's house was visited and quite a sum taken. Jerry claimed to have been a very great loser, for besides beiner chloroformed, he lost his last cent. Excitement wan intense. The men began to fcit up all night, so as to guard their property. .Jerry's misfortune ouly made him more popular. Popularity seemed to turn his head,/or he left Walter's aid openly anuounced himself as a candi date for Annie's hand. Fate seemed to smile on him, for the village was again excited. The excitement was now caused by the appearance of a young lady giving her name as Miss Dowi.s, ami occupation as school teacher. She rented a small house and soon had a fine class. W alter met her on the road one day and fell in love with her. At first he tried to mask his feelmgs, but finding that Jerry and Annie were getting along very nicely, and he ran up his true colors and becawe the ardent suitor of Miss Downs. Yet withal, one atijrry word had not been spoken by either Annie or Walter himself. Miss Downs soon became a general favorite, and her class began to swell. IJurgiaries had grown to be common occurreuGes apd, in the course of time Miss Downs was a victim. She seemed to take the loss in a matter-of-fact way. But, if the villa gers could have been present at a lit tle conference that was held in her house the following night, about 12, they would have taken a different view of the affair. The little assem blage was composed of three strange men and herself. They held a long conversation, and along towards 1 o'clock all left the house save Miss Downs, and going out on the road they tuddeuly disappeared Miss Downs now turned down the light, changed her entire dress, and shortly afterwards left the house. Meanwhile Jerry Black Lad so wrought himself into the affec„ions of the Rose family that the old home stead was placed at his disposal. He was, at this date, pressing his suit hard with the hope of setting an ear ly date for his marriage to Annie. As to Walter, well he had no time to lose thinking of Annie, for he was busily engaged with Miss Downs. About this time Mr. Ilose had sold a piece of land for a snug sum, and on the day after the burglary of Miss Downs' house he received the amount ia fall. He took Jerry into his con fidence and exacted of him a promise to remain at his house all night to guard the money. Jerry was taken sick very suddenly, and he could not fulfill his promise. It was with mis givings that he retired that night just about the time Miss Downs left her little house. The light in Mr. Hose's room had been turned (Jov/n about a half hour when a man appeared in the road just south of the farm. He walked very fast until he was opposite the gate, when he halted, looked around, and then walked up the lane to the house, As he approached it a huge dog sprang toward him. He hadted long enough to speak a familiar word to the dog and then proceeded on his way toward the door unmolested by the brute. The door yielded to the man's key, and after looking around once more he entered'. No sooner had the door closed than a slight form sprang from behind a bush close by and took up a position a little to the left of the door. The person gave a signal,and two men suddenly appear ed a few yards from the house, while a fourth man sprang from behind a tree they leveled their revolvers at the door while the first party turned the lurid glare of a dark lantern on the door also, Meanwhile they heard a noise upstairs, then a scream, and at last footsteps approaching the door. A second elapsed before the door opened and the thief stood before them, baffled and entrapped. It was Jerry Black. The first man, who was the leader of the party, ordered Jerry to throw up his hands, which he did with grace. Then he was handcuffed, and when Mr. Rose came down stairs half dead from fright, he was startled at seeing his intended son-ia-law marched away as a burg lar and fugitive from New York jus tice. The next miming when the school children went to school they found a notice tacked up on the door which read: CLOSED FOK COOD, : MISS DOWNS. : * * People wondered what had happen ed to Miss Downs. They were not kept in suspense very long, for that same day Walter received a letter which informed him that Miss Downs was nothing more or less than a New York male detective in search of Hen ry Sharp, a noted thief, and, as he had been captured in the person of •Jerry Black, Miss Downs had ceased to exist. Walter and Annie never mado up; in "fact both are confirmed oppouents of the matrimonial craze, while the Rev. Jones still insists that his bet should be declared "off " Around the World in 97 Day. NEW YORK, May 11.—In one of the mail pouches in the steamer Alaska when she sailed to-day was a Russian postal card which is now completing its journey around the world. Should it have a good voy age it wili get to its destination in just 91 days. Un the reverse of the card is written in a fair English haud: This postal canl is, as a matter of bet, in tended to be mailed around the globe within 100 days. That is to say, in such an order as mentioned at foot. All parties to whom it has been, directed will greatly oblige by can celing the old address an 3 putting the next one in place of it, at the same time stating day of arrival and retnailing in the blank left for this purpose. Any postage will be willingly lepaid, and any of the parties de siring will receive a full copy after return of this card. May it travel safely and soon return. OSCAR SMIT, Libeau, Russia. "LIBEAU, 15 February, 10 evening, ISS7." The card was first addressed to John Little & Co., Singapore. They received it March 29, and remailed it the next day to J. Rickett, in Yoka hama, Japan. It reached them April 10 at 6 P M., but tLey did not reraail it until April 15, when they sent it to John 11. Boden & Co , San Francisco. It arrived there April 30, and was not forwarded until May 2, when it was sent to Mr. R F. Downing, in this city. He received it yesterday and mailery sentence aid Red Shirt stepped back Then Yellow Strip 1 Face, the half-breed interpreter, was presented, Then came two squiws, the mothers of the twj p.ippaosei ia the cimo A little pappoose was fi>*st present ed. Tne Qieen patted her cheek with her black silk-gloved hand aad then the little tiling stuck out her brown paw and the Queen shook it At this the Queen stepped back, but the mother was not contented. She walked up and stuck out her haad and the Queen shook hands gravely and bowed. Then the other squaw came up and said "how," and oliered her hand Then the little brown boy pappoose eamo up and offered his hand. Tue Quaen shook hands with them all, these being the only mem bers of tha Will Wesi that were thus honored. On His Country's Altai*. From the Philadelphia Daily New A Lycoming county farmer, bless ed by the possession of broad acres and fat cattle, and a fatter bank ac count, bad given bis tire sons—more precious than all else besides—that the Union might be preserved. His name wa3 Rankin. His wife was dead and his boys were his only so lace, but when war was declared he felt as did Yolumuin, the mother of Coriolauus, when she said, 'Had 1 a dozen sons, each in my love alike, I had rather have eleven die nobly for their country than cue voluptously perfeit out of action.' So the Rankin boys went to confront grim-visaged war. The life-blood of two of tLem made more fertile the rank growth of the Peninsula, and their bodies lav unclaimed amid the thousands who had gone down iu the shock of battle. The bowed but not broken father cam 3 to the Governor's office in Ilar risburg with his tail of woe. Au drew G. Curtin never turned a deaf ear to such as he. lie said: "You are too old a man to go after your sons' bodies. I will send a messenger for them aud you can rest assured that you will be enabled to give them burial." And this was doqe. After tba second battle of Manas ses the aged farmer again entered the Executive Chamber, and, without saying a word, seated himself. The Governor recognized him at once, aud thought: "Cau it be that this old man has been afilicted again?" He bade hira approach. The visit or's voice was broken, but his tears did net fall as he said: "Governor, auother of them has gone." For a moment Governor Curtin could not speak. He silently wrung the horny hand of the despoiled fath er. When he found voice he said: "You must not go; I will send for him. You shall sae him again." And this was done. When the news of the battle of Gettysburg reached Ilarrisburg Gov ernor Curtin traveled rapidly across the country aud viewed that mem orable conflict. After its conclusion he returned to Harrisburg tand was seated late at night in his room, when again Mr. Rankin entered without a word, and silently seated himself upon a chair. "My God," thought Mr. Curtin, "it cannot be that the blow has fallen upon this old man again." Ho could uot bring himself to a.-k the question, and for ftiiiy iitteea min utes the two mon sat in the room, their heads upjn their hands, aud neither uttered a word. At last the old man said, as he steadied his voice: "Governor, the other two are gone." "The other two? This is terri- "Yes, Governor, the other two, They have taken them all." He wished a pass to enter the lines that he might bring homa his silent sons'. "You are too old," said the an guished Governor. "I will send for them, and they shall be taken home." And this was done. After Governor Curtin had return ed to this country at the close of his five years' residence at the court of Russia, he was in Philadephia when it was intimated to him that Mr Ran kin, who was still alive, would be highly delighted if his benefactor would pay him a visit when the ex- Miniater was on his way to his home in Centre county. Mr. Curtin said that he would comply with the wish, and when he reached the railroad sta tion nearest to the LyoomiDg county farmer's home, he found the old man waiting for him with a carriage. That evening the people of the surrouuding country, at Mr. Rankin,s bidding, flocked to do honor to the ex-Govern or. The next morning, after partak ing of a breakfast such as only a Pennsylvania farm house can produce, the aged agriculturist invited Mr. Curtin to join him in a walk. He led the way to a wc oded knob near the house, and atop of which was a beautifully sodded inclosure,surround ed by an iron railing, and within it were five mounds and five headstones. The old man pointed toward them, and simply said: "Governor, there they lie." Both men bowed their heads, and neither uttered a word. In a few moments Mr Rankin turned away with a cheery remark about the sur rounding country, and from that mo ment during the two days' festivities that succeeded Mr. Curtin's arrival, the desolate father never referred to his sleeping sons. Pathetic, isn't it? , Mr. and Mrs. bowser. From Detroit Free Press.] I suppose that Mr. Bowser is like the majority of men putting the best side before the public. The other morning when he left the house he knew that baby was sick, I had a headache and the cook was disabled by cuttiug her haul on a piece of glass. I had told him that we were out of butter aud cofoe and potatoes, and ha said he would stop aud order them Once on the car he forgot all about it, and at half-past 11, meeting an old schoolmate, he insisted: ">'ow you come right up to dinner with me. I want you to see my house and my family, and have a vis it." "But your wife won't be expecting j company." ' "Oh, you come right along. My wife and my house are always ready for any visitors I may bring home, and your presence won't cause us an i iota of embarrassment " At 11 o'clock I told Jane to pick np any sort of dinner for Mr. Bowser, aud at 12 Mr. Bowser a nd his friend entered the house. Leaving him in the parlor, Mr. Bowser rushed in on me with: "Get into your Sunday clothes" aa soon as possible—dress the baby up tell the cook to have three kinds of meat—send for a nigger to wait on the table, and run through the room and pick up things." "Mr. Bowser, have you been idiot enough to bring some cne home to j dinner." | "Of course I have. What is there wrong about that, I would like to kuow?" "Well, where are the groceries you ' went to order?" "Groceries? I forgot!" i "Jaue can't use but one hand, while 1 should faint away if I tried to dress. You'll have to take him to a hotel." "Never! When I invite a man to partake of my hospitality I'll never i scul! him off to a hotel! [lt is a pretty state of affairs that my house : is all upset in this manner at this ■ time! Mrs. Bowser, you and I must have a reckoning! I'll be hanged ■■ if I put up with such conduct as . this!" And then he returned to the parlor aad 1 heard him say: j "Well, old fellow, I find a note from my Bride (that's me) stating : that she had taken the little angel ! (t hat's our wall eyed babv) over to : her sister's for the day, and our idiot ' of a cook didin't expect me home and : has no dinner ready. We'll have to j go down to the restaurant." I "That's all right. You've got a : beautiful home here. " "And the nicest little wife and the ' prettiest baby in all the world!" ex claimed Mr. Bowser as he slapped his leg. An Original Set of Pictures. Chicago News.] If you'll wait a minute I'll get yon the proofs of a very original set of pictures. Here they are. Look like a lot of scenes from a play,don't they. They belong to a Michigan lady. She came to me not long ago and made an appointment for herself and hus for the next morning. She said I had better reserve at least three hours, as she wanted a complete set of pictures taken, and would have to change her dress several times They arrived the next day with a Saratoga trunk and a valise, and had them brought up to the dressing room. It turned out that they were a bride and a groom, and that she had been struck with the idea of having a series of pictures taken commemorat ing each important event in their courtship. The submissive groom himself didn't seem to think the idea a particularly brilliant one, but he evidently had to give in. "First," she said, "we'll have our introduction," and she made him put on a light tweed summer suit and ar rayed herself in a pink gauzy affair and a sun hat—it seemed they had first met at a picnic—and these were the identical clothes worn on the oc casion. She remembered how they had stood when presented to each other, and had the little scene repro duced as nearly as possible. Then they changed to evening dress end were taken as they appeared when waltzing together for the first time. No. 3is the boating picture. I don't exactly know what it commemorates, but suppose some especially tender i passage. Then she wanted to have the proposal scene, but he objected to tbat, and so vigorously that I at once suspected him of having resort ed to his knees on the occasion. They had quite a tiff over it, but finally compromised it on the time when she played him the "Moonlight Sonata." The piano was wheeled in and, in my opinion, that makes the prettiest pic ture of all. Here is at the altar. That's the last of present series, but I believe they intend coming to town every year, on the anniversary of their wedding day, for the purpose adding a new one to the collec tion, How She Lost Her Maid. Clara Belle, in one of her notable letters, says: Speaking of humbug, a Fifth Ave., belle's maid, a trim, pretty creature, suddenly disappeared recently; and it was a wonder, because the girl was well paid in proportion to her good looks—for it is deliciously swell now to have a pretty body servant, She had not seemingly been dissatisfied with her work or wages. Her em ployer feared that some sentimental harm had come to her, and charitably went so far as to hire a private de tective to hunt her up, Where do you think he found her? She was an advertising exhibit in a hair-wash es tablishment. There is a boom on in that industry. Phenomenally long haired women are posed in the win dows of stores where hair tonics are on sale, and competition is hot. The comely maid had luxuriant tresses, which gww so heavily and rapidly that she went periodically to a hair dresser to have them cut short. "How much wages do you get?" he asked her. . "Twenty-four dollars am^~*ir/'she replied. "I can get you donble that," he said, "and nothing at all to do except to be admired, Oh, don't be alarmed —there's no harm in it. Messrs. Blank & Co., the well known makers of Cerulian Glory, want to boom their stuff. You are just the girl they desire. You will have your head shaved close. Then they will show you freely to their customers, telling them that yon lost your hair years ago by feyer, and had given up all hopes of regaining it; you have tried many preparations in vain; they are going to experiment on you. Your hair grows fast and fine—it is on view from day to day—it becomes a marvel—the fame of it spreads by word of mouth, and by the time your head has regained its usual beauty they have sold 1,000 extra bottles of Ceruliau, and you have received three mouths' extra wages. Sea?" She saw; and that was how the Fifth avenue belle lost her pretty maid. —"lt is the little things that tell," says an old adage. Yes, especially the little brothers. —Physic beats the faith cure, be cause it has the ineide track. NO. 27