VOL. XX. LEGAL ADVERTISEMENTS. ~A«lmi nlitrator'w Notice. Wherein letters of •administration have beer granted by tbe Register to the underoignec upon tbe estate of Charles Oswald. Sr, late ol Oakland twp. Butler connty.Pa. deed AUperaoni who know themselves indebted to said e«tat« will make immediate payment, and those having, claims against the same will present them properly authenticated for settlement E itber to myself or my Attorney, J li McTCNKIN, PHILIP OSWALD. Att'y for Adm'r Administrator Oct 17, 1882 No 3710 Butler St Pitts Pa Petition tor Partition. In lie Petition of Elizabeth Burry, an heir-at law of Koch, dee'd, ior inquest 10 make partition. O. C., No. 42, Sept. Term, 1882. Sept. -Ith, 1882, Citation awarded returnable to next term. Notice by publications to heirs who do not reside in the State and by service on those who reside iu the State. BY TIIE COURT. BUTLER CO. S. S.: Now, therefore, you, Elizabeth Burry, in termarried with John Hurry, the petitioner, now of Allegheny city, Pa., Leonard Koch, ot Shreveport, Louisiana, Charlotte, intermarried with Michael Seifer, of , and the following grand children, being song and daughters of Margaret Koch, dee'd, intermarried witji Weulner, viz : Valentine Weidner, Leonard Wrtdncr, Adain Weidner, Annie Weidner, some of whom reside in Butler Co., ond others in Clarion Co., but their place of residence is unknown, are hereby commanded and cited to appear before the Judte of the Orphan's Court of Butler, on Monday, the 4th day of December, 1882, or show cause why writ of inquest should not be awarded as pray ed for. Witness the Hon. E. McJunkin, Pies't Judge of our said Court at Butler, this 13th day of Oct.. 1882. W. B. DODDS, Clerk, O. C. Petition for Partition. Petition of Eleanor McKinney, for Partition of the real estate of Robert McKinney, dee'd, late ef Adams township, Butler county, Pa. O. C., No. 44, September Term, 1882. Oct. 13th, 1882, Rule to show cause why writ of partition should not issue according to law, granted upon the heirs within named. Personal service to be made on all residing within the county and by publication as to the others returnable to next term. Paper to be sent to non-residents with notice. BV THE CORBT. BUTLER COUNTY, 1 □ Q STATE OF PEN S'A. J " ' Now, therefore, you, James McKinney, Mar f;eret, intermarried with William Pierce, resi ngat Beaver Falls, Pa., Elizabeth Jane, resid ing in Adams twp., Butler county, Pa., Wil liam McKinney, residing in Trego county, Cansas, Mary, itermarried with A. J. Fleming, residing in Adams twp., John C. McKinnev, residing in Mercer county, Pa., Samuel R. McKinney, residing in Adams township, shall be and appear iu your proper persons at an Orphan's Court to hie held at Butler, in and for said county on the first Monday of Decem ber, then and "there to show cause if any you have why writ of Partition should not issue as prayed for. Witness the lion E. McJunkin, Pres't Judge of our said Court at Butler, this 14th day of October, 1882. W. B. DODDS, Oct. 25, 'B2. Clerk O. C. Orphans' Court Sale. By virtue of a decree of the Orphans' Court of Butler county, to us directed, as well as by the authority given us in the last will and tes tament of Samuel G. Meals, dee'd, we will offer for sale at public outcry on the premises in Washington township, on FRIDAY, DECEMBER 1, 1882. at 1 o'clock p. M., the following real estate: SO Acres and 75 Perches out of the northwest corner of the farm lately occupied by the said Samuel O. Meals, dec'u, described as follows: Beginning at a post, thence north 57° east 80 7-10 perches, south 284° east 15 7-10 perches, north 784° east 42 7-10 perches, north i° east 60 2-10 perehes, north 794° east 22 4-10 perches, north 4° east 37 pearches, south 79J° west perches, north 2° east 6 1-10 perches, north 874° west 80 perches, south 5° west 4 perches, south 14° east 11 3-10 perches, south 24° east 21 perches, south 294° west 44 perches, south 3° east 65 6-10 perches t > the place of beginning. About 75 acres cleared, balauce good timber Good two story frame house and bank barn recently erected thereon. TERMS— One-third of the purchase money on confirmation of sale by the Court, and the remainder in two equal annual installments with lawful interest from that date, to be se cured by bond and mortgage. I. N. & G. W. MEALS, nov. 8 4t] . Executors. Itoari Report*. , Notice is hereby given that the following road reports have been oonfirmed nisi, by the Court, arid will be presented on the first Wed nesday of I)eceinber ( 1882, being the sixth day of the month, and if no exceptions are filed they will be confirmed absolutely: No. 4, June term, 1882. Head in Buffalo township, commencing at a point where the Kittanning and Pittsburgh road crosses the Denny Mill road, being so much of said Denny Mill road as lies between said pjint and where it intersects Bearcreek and Freeport road. No. C, June term, 1882. Road in Venango, beginning at or near house of James liiggins and leading to the point of intersection at or near the house of Frank McN'amee. Butler county ss: Certified from the record this 14th day of Nov. 1882. W. B. DODDS, Clerk. ' BOOTS AND SHOES" MADE TO ORDER JOHN liCKEL'S. French and American Kip boots made to order on short notice, also Fine wear lor Ladies, Gentlemen and Children. Repairing also doue on short notice. BUTLER COUJSTY Mutual Fire Insurance Co. Office Cor. Main and Cunningham Sts. J. C. ROESSING, PRESIDENT. WM. CAMPBELL, TREASUKKK H. C. HEINEMAN, SKCRETAKV. DIRECTORS: J.L.Purvis, , E. A. Helmboldt, William Campbell, J. W, Burkhart, A. Trontiuaa, Jacob Schoene, G. C. Roesalng, John Caldwell, Dr. W. Irvin, J. J. Croll. A.B.Rhodes, i 11. C. Heineman. JAS. T. M'JUNKIN, Gen. A«'t BUTLEE, "GET THE BEST Walchefl, Clocks, Jewelry, Spectacles, Ami Milver-Plated Ware, at the lowest cash prices at D. L. CLEE LANDS, one square South of Court House. yj}-Watches, Clocks, Jewelry and Spec tacles carefully repaired to order and satisfae tion guaranteed. FKItHIH AHMOU, Justice of the Peace Main street, opposite Fostofflce, ZKU.&XOSLt, PA. Two Stray Steers. Two stray tteere camo to tiie premises of the enbecriber, Concord twp.. Butler coouty, Ps., stoat the firtt of September lsst; both are red and white: onf* ordinary nize. the other rather Hmall, each supposed to be a year old last spring The uwner is requested to come forward, prove property pay charge* and take tLem away, otherwise they will be disposed of ac cording to law. EDWARD GRAHAM, Oct. 30. 'B2. Concord twp., Butler Co., Pa. $25 Reward. Will be given on the return o 9 the following described note, which was loot while in posses sion of Jchn M. Thompson, in or about the Court House, Oct. 10, 1882 : The note was datod March 16, 1878 ; of the sum £5.500. payable to ELJen Dunlap and signed by James Heron. The above reward will be freely paid on presentation of the note at Bunbury, Butler county. ELLEN DUNLAP. Union Woolen Mill, BUTLER, PA. 11. FULLERTOX. Prop'r. Manufacturer of BLANKETS, FLANNELS, YARNS, «Sc. Also custom work done to order, such as curding Rolls, making Blankets, Flannels, Knit ting and Weaving Yarns, &c., at very low prices. Wool worked on the shares, it de sired. my7-ly Two Farms for Sale. Tlie heirti of Robert McKinnay, dee'd, late of Adams twp.. Butler county, Pa." will sell at private eale, and in lot*, a farm of over 200 -Azores, situated one and a half miles from Templeton Station, on the Pittsburgh erior in Flavor. The Most Econom ical. Requires only hall" the usual quantity. Sold by nil Grocers. JOHN C. PHILLIPS A CO., Aireuts of the Calcutta Tea Syndicate, 130 Water St., N. Y. Novß-ly. Public S ale of Valuable Real and Personal Estate. BY OKDKK OF COCRT. Will be offered at public sale at the Court House in Butler, Pa., on Thursday tlie 7tl» clay of Deo. 1882, at one o'clock, P. M., all that cer tain lot of ground situate at the corner of Iligh and Jefferson, streets in the borough of Butler, Pa., on which is erected the three storv brick building known as the First National Bank building, described in deed from Charles Duffy dated 12th January 1872 to the First National Bank of Butler, Pa., »s follows, namely : "Beginning at the Southwest corner of Hitch and Jefferson streets, thence South along High street twenty (20) feet to line of lot now owned by Charles Duffy, thence West by the line of said lot parallel with Jefferson street eighty (80) feet to a narrow alley thence North by said alley twenty (20; feet to Jefferson street thence East along Jefferson street eighty (80) feet to place of beginning. Being part of lot No. 116 in the gene ral plan of the Bor ough of Bntler. Being a portion ot a larger lot of ground conveyed to Charles Duffy by John M. Thompson and wife by deed, dated January 3d, A. D., 1872. The same having been conveyed to John M. Thompson by Dr. J. Cooper McKee by deed dated September 20, A. D., 1871. Reference being had thereto the same will more fully appear—excepting to the said grantor (Duffy) his heirs and assigns the right of way from Jefferson street by a wide open stairway leading to the upper story ofbuilding, to be erected on the lot hereby conveyed and on the lot of the grantor adjoining it on the south, and thence by a hall and stairway to be builded in said building so as to have ingress and egress by said hall and stairway from the Jefferson street entrance to the upjier stories to be built on the lot of said Duffy as aforesaid, and also to the upper storries of the building of the Butler Savings Bunk on the lot adjoining lot of said Duffy on the south. The building to be erect ed on the lot hereby conveyed to be of such height that the stories or floors will be level with the floors of said Butler Savings Bank and the aforesaid and described Jefferson street entrance is to he used in common as a right of way for the aforesaid lots of the Butler Savings Bank and the grantor." For chain of title, reference is made to the deed from the County of Butler, dated 15th of August, 1811, reoorded in deed book D, page 543 to Hugh McKee, whose interest became divested by judicial sale as appears by deed from George W, Reed, Esq., Sheriff' ol Butler county, dated the 15th December, 1847, record ed in deed book S, page 607 to Christian Otto, who by deed dated 11th March, 1853, recorded in deed book T, page 664 conveyed the same to Isaiuh John McKee who by.his last will and testament, dated 7th March, 1853, recorded in will book D, paue 114, devised the same to James Cooper McKee, who by deed dated the 20th September, 1871, recorded in deed book No. 64, page 316, conveyed the same to John M. Thompson, who, and Laurettu his wife, by deed dated the 3d of January 1872, recorded in deed book No. 64, page 314, conveyed the same to Charles Duffy, who by deed dated the 12th January 1872, recorded in deed book No. 30, page 295, conveyed that j>ortion of the said lot of ground, No. 116, hereinbefore described, to the First National Bank of Butler, Pa. It being that portion of said lot upon which is erected a three-story brick building, used as the First National Banking house, etc.—of the First National Bank of Butler, Pa- Also, at the same time and place, the follow ing personal property, namely: one calendar clock, 2 desks, I letter press with stand, 2 fancy covered top tables, 1 long table, 1 fancy chair, 1 rug, 1 stove and pipe, 1 stove, 1 book case, 2 stools, !t chairs and one step ladder. Terms of payment: As to real estate, one half cash on day of sale and the other half within six mouths thereafter, with interest, and with such security us shall be satisfactory to the Receiver, and no deed to be made to the purchaser until the consideration shall be fully paid: and as to personal property, cash to be paid on day of sale. JOHN N. PURVIANCE, Receiver of First National Hauk of Butler, Pa. flutter, Pa., Nov !>, 1882, »i. *or Dyip«p«i* f janiaw Chronic Dtor. 0 rboea. Jaundice# Imparity of th« Blood, Fewr and Ague, XalariAi and all DUeaMi ran gem en t of LiYar, Bowels and Kidseji* SYMPTOMS OF A DISEASHCD LIVER. Bad Breath ; Pain in the Side, tometimes th« run is felt under the Shoulder-blade, mistaken for heumatism; general lost of appetite; Bowek Kierally costive, sometimes alternating with lax; head is troubled with pain, is dull and heavy, with considerable loss of memory, accompanied with a painful sensation ofleaving undone something which ought to have been done; a slight, dry couga ard flushed face is sometimes an attendant, often mistaken for consumption; the patient complains of weariness and debility; nervous, easily startled: feet cold or burning, sometimes a pricklv sensation of the skin exists; spirits are low and desDondent, and, although satisfied that exercise would oe bene ficial, yet one can hardly summon up fortitude to try it—in fact, distrusts every remedy. Severn* of the above symptoms attend the disease, but cases have occurred when but few of them existed, yet examination after death has shown the Lirer to have boen extensively deranged. It should be used by all persons, old and young, whenever any of the above symptoms appear* Persons Traveling or living In Un healthy Localities, t>v taking a dose occasion ally to keep the Liver in neahhy action, will avoid all Malaria, Bilious attacks. Dizziness, Nau sea, Drowsiness, Depression of Spirits, etc. It will invigorate like a glass of wine, but is no in toxicating beverage. If Tou have eaten anything hard of digestion, or feel heavy after meals, or sleep less at night, take a dose and you will be relieved. Time and Doctors' Bills will be saved by always keeping the Regulator > in the House I For, whatever the ailment may be, a thoroughly safe purgative, alterative and tonic can never be out of place. The remedy is harmless and does not interfere with business or pleasure. IT IS PURELY VEGETABLE, And has all the power and efficacy of Calomel or Quinine, without any of the injurious after effects. A Governor's Testimony. Simmons Liver Regulator has been in use in my family for some time, and I am satisfied it is a valsablc addition to the medical science. J. Gill Shortkx, Governor of Ala. Hon. Alexander H. Stephens, of Oa., says: Have derived some benefit from the use of Simmons Liver Regulator, and wish to give it a further trial. "The only Thing that never fkils to Relieve." —l have used many remedies for Dys pepsia, Liver AfTection and Debility, but never nave found anything to benefit me to the extent Simmons Liver Regulator has. I Sent from Min nesota to Georgia for it, and would send further for such a medicine, and would advise all who are sim ilarly affected to give it a trial as it seems the only thing that never toils to relieve. P. M. JANNEV, Minneapolis, Minn. Dr. T. W. Mason says: From actual ex perience in the use of Simmons Liver Regulator in my practice I have been and am satisfied to use and prescribe it as a purgative medicine. only the Genuine, which always has on the Wrapper the red Z Trade-Mark and Signature of J. 11. ZEILIN & CO. FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS. STRENGTH to vigorously push a business, strength to study a profession, strength to regulate a household) strength to do a day's labor with out physical pain. All this repre sents what is wanted, in the often heard expression, "Oh ! I wish I had the strength!" If you are broken down, have not energy, or feel as if life was hardly worth liv ing, you can be relieved and re stored to robust health and strength by taking BROWN'S IRON BIT TERS, which is a true tonic—a medicine universally recommended for all wasting diseases. SOi N. Fremont St., Baltimore During the war I wa» in jured in the stomach by a piece of a shell, and have suffered from it ever since. About four years ago it brought on paraly sis, which kept me in bed six months, and the best doctors in the city said I could not live. I suffered fearfully from indigestion, and for over two years could not eat solid food and for a large portion of the time was unable to retain even liquid nourishment. I tried Brown's Iron Bitters and now after taking two bottles I am able to get up and go around and am rapidly improving. C. Decker. BROWN'S IRON BITTERS is a complete and sure remedy for Indigestion, Dyspepsia, Malaria, Weakness and all diseases requir ing a true, reliable, non-alcoholic tonic. It enriches the blood, gives new life to the muscles and tone to the nerves. f THE M^lrcTiffre BUFFALO, NX THE ONLY ASSOCIATION OF PROMINENT Lady Physicians IN" THE WORLD. This Institution was formed for the sole pur pose of treating the diseases of women, ft la composed only of physicians who have obtained a leading rank In the profession by their acknowledged ability and success, and who have made the health and diseases of women a study for years. Ladles can be successfully treated at home, without any other expent-e than the cost of the medicine. Advice by mall frit. Send stamp forcircularsand testimonials from ludies who have been permanently cured. "LADIES' TONIC" Is the Favorite Prescription of the Women's Medical Institute for Prolapsus Uteri, or Falling of the Womb. Is compat terots, disappeared temperrarily from the scene. 'lt bein' now somewhat advanced in the afternoon, a suggestion was made that we should perceed at once to the polls. But the brotherly feelin' which always annermated the voters of Amity, as I have said, gentlemen, has never permitted the castin' of a hur ried and onpermeditated vote. I fear, however, that Williamstou had been indulgin' somewhat too freely in the cider of the Dimmocracy, when, after some differculty, he succeeded at length in reachin' the chair, and pound ed an entirely onnecessary length of time on the counter perlimenary to in troducin' a bill. His tones, which at first was husky, grew clear and loud as he perceeded. 'I move,' says he, 'that an injunc tion be put upon the publercation, cirkerlation, or pursuin' of any almanick save and exceptin' Rob ert B. Thomas's old-fashioned, old farmer's yallar-covered, ten-cent alman ick ! Gentlemen', says he, 'I was in duced last year to accept another al manick as a gift from an acquaintance. I took it home to my family as a in structor and a guide. Gentlemen, that almanick was the work of an in cendenderrary and a fiend. My wife and me was made to go to church on Saturday, and wondered to find the doors of the sanctooary closed ag'in us We was made the scandal of our neigh bors by washin' on Sunday, and bakin' in the middle of the week. Gentle men, the moon in that almanick was seen at first quarter in perigee in the mornin', and fulled in apogee before night, besides bein' represented of a shape to draw tears from the eyes of science. December was set down as showery and January without a thaw. Moreover, in the back part of the al manick was receipts, among which was given one removin' stains from the mouth after eatin' huckleberry pie. My wife and me innercently ap plied the mixter. Gentlemen, for days we wae in torments, and our blistered burnin' mouths was closed to our fami ly and friends. Gentlemen, shall not sech dastardly and inhuman perceedin's be stopped?' Here Williamston sunk exhausted into his chair, and the mo tion was put and carried by an over whelmin' majority. 'Scarcely had Williamston been re moved ere a member of our own party was brought triumpherntlv forrered by bis compatterots and set upon the chair. His emotions was sech that that the ruler sank lifeless from his hands, and it was some time before he could perceed. He begun in a fur away dyin' tone that graduerly burst into a voice of thunder. 'I am tired,' says he, of party strife and.perfitical intrigues. lam sick of campaigns and nommfcrualions and 'lections and caukerses. I want to settle it once and forever by nommer uatin' a good bereddertary king. And I hereby move and nommernate that Colonel Sonoroaß B. Bacon be app'int ed hereditary king?' There is no knowin, what action might have been took in regard to my rash though well-meanin' constituent, had not our attention been diverted by the fact that the voters of the town of Amity was suddenly seen in a body wendin, their way towards the Deep Gulley and Loud Western railroad tracks, which tracks, gentlemen run parallel with each other through the sand-gap, at a distance of some three or four rods from the Amity Town hall. Soon I perceived that I was standin' alone by the deserted polls, and I turned and followed my com patterots to learn what might be the cause of this singerler conduct Gentlemen, I have already narrated to you more than was my intention of the brotherly feelin', the friendly and am'able perceedin's, which was carried on in our little town of Amity durin' this important occasion, but I think I should fail in my dooty if I neglected to say that, as I j'ined my companions in the gap, it was everdent that the bettin' had been high and the stakes was about equal. For I beheld Jones settin' with his hoss and buggy on the Deep Gully railroad track, calmly awaitin' the arival ot the Loud Wes tern train, with which, yes, gentle men, with which it was his intention to run parallel in a race through the gap! 'As I gazed upon Jones, I cannot describe to you the emotions which temperrarily overcome me. I had ex pected much of my constituents, but I was not prepared for sech a display patterotism as this. I was about to rush forrered to assure him that this was unecessary, when the roar of the approachin' train was heard, and calm ly waitin' to git abreast of the Loud Western engine, Jones loosened the reins on his palpertatin' steed, and dis appeared like a met'or up the track. "Gentlemen, I have heard it said that there is a singerlarity about the bosses and waggins of the voters of Amity which would cause them to be easily distinguished anywheres on the face of the globe. And I will not deny that the back of the seat of Jones's buggy was formed of a mahogony pew door procured from the ruiua of the old Presbyterian church, and upon which the figger 6, representin' the number of the pew to its former occu pants, was still strikin'ly visible. Moreover, Jones's wife, bein' of an astheticky nature, has tacked around the ramparts of the buggy consid'ra ble of the old pulpit fringe, simariarlv procured from the ruins. But now, gentlemen, as I watched that figger 6 disappearin' up the track in a wavin' sea of fringe, and heard the clatterin' of Jones's boss and .bug gy risin' even above the roarot engine afl lesser emotions was forgotten. I was compelled to lean upon a neigh bor for support. But when the breath less excitement had passed away, and it was announced, by secb as had sta tioned themselves to the termination of the gap, a tie, perlitical issoos was for the moment swallowed up in our mu tual despair. We grasped each other's hands in silence, and I doc't believe, no, gentlemen, I don't believe there was a dry eye amongst the voters of the town of Amity. Butthesunwas fast westerin'. The polls was about to close. Realizin' this fact, the vo ters of Amity rushed permisc'ously to ward the Towu-hall. Leavin' our valiernt constituents to defend for a moment our interest at tho polls, Hec and I sped to the boss-sheds, where Aut Tilbox was still loudly, sweetly sleepin'. We spoke to Aut in gentle entertainin' accents, but he answered not. We shook and we threatened him, but the sound of bis resoundin' slumbers was the only reply borne to onr waitin' ears. There was a despar ing gleam in Hec's eye, and then on accountable flash of trierumph. In less time than the words leaves my mouth, Hec was exchaogin' clo's with the un conscious Aut lleights was equally tall, and corperlancy was supplied by means of a half sheaf of straw procur ed from a neighborin' waggin, and which was stuffed under the perdigi ous waistcoat Hec had now assumed. There was but one thing wantin': Aut's beard was of a peculiar yallow ish tinge, growin' in perfusiou from under his chin, his face bein' other wise smooth. Hec's lightnin' eye fell upon the tail of Jedge Marlborough's hoss, standin' near. Yes, gentlemen, there was no denyin', that beard and that hoss's tail was of the same onnat ural color. Gentlemen, it was no sooner said than done! Marlborough's hoss stood without a tail—that is, gen tlemen, without no tail to speak on. But a differculty arose on account of Hec's mustache: 'I half anticerpated this,' says he, and groania' drew a razor from his pocket. 'lt's all for Fairblow,' save he. And 'lt'll grow ag'in,' says he; and without another word that beautiful curvin' mustache fell to the earth. By means of some pine pitch the tail of Jedge Marlbor ough's hoss was quickly adjusted un der the chin of my youthful constitu ent; and then assumin' Aut's beaver bat as a last tetch, and thrustin' one arm akimbo, and steppen' out with that peculiar tread for which distinguished, and which I describe to you, gentlemen, of a hop and skip, as though a-keepin' time to the invisible music, Hec wended doward the Town-hall. Gentlemen, sech was my that I set weakly down on rail, and if my life had been at stake, for some moments not have riz. Positively, I could not have Gent^^^^^J the actual Aut Tilbox had take his place by the side would not have been identery would have been and be would have been an impositor. For youthful constittaent and amblin, and wards the Town-ball, denied to my amazed vision that he was the Aut Tilbox that ever I he was Aut Tilboxer than^^^^^^H 'So the persumptive for tered the Town-hall, and wards the polls, and swing publican ticket derfiantly s ped it inter the box; anj thrustin' to one side the | exclamations of his disad patterots, he was permittj citement of the momentJ unfollered from the scenel 'Five minutes afterwafl a-standin' with llec, rJ his own clo's, the loss offl and a little griminess ufl not bein' at sech a time nfl of, I was declared Tofl Reegistrar of the town <■ majority, gentlemen—bl one! ■ 'I will not linger 1< scenes which happened this eventful day. Sei that when Jedge Marl was brought around I stood discoursin' loud!) hall steps after the e observed the sittuation tail, his language was hesertate, gentlemen, this narration. 'Any! Marlborough, in res 'anybody that 'l' disfi, late the tail of a noblt is not worthy of the t racy!' And the co language was simply sumever, as I wendec wards that evenin' n gratefulness and peac be disturbed even by stittuents of Jedge burnin' me in effergj der of the Hornpike 'And on the follow men, Fairblow Ba Aspinwall wasj'ined rimony, to the residei parents. The incerd< was forgotten. The v of Amity, with their feßtive to my house, ir litical differences. Ij Waters's eyes was M tied the knot, gentlemei sider it a thing to be c meoted oa. And ea hands with Marl Junior, who stood I somewhat pale in a corner, 'Marl,' says I, 'I wish that I had another darter j like Fairblow for you, I do indeed.' j 'Colonel,' 6ays Marl, 'I wish you had, but tbat would be ompossible.' 'Fairblow and Hec have lived most happy together. Their house is, per haps with one exception, the finest res erdence in Amity, bein' pleasantly sur rounded by piazzers, a fountain, and a cowpello, and, two weeks ago, an infant cherrib, which bears, gentlemen, the name of Sonorous Bacon Aspinwall. 'But some days after the 'lection Aut Tilbox was struttin' around, in his proud and corperlant way, makin' bis : boast of bein' diserfected with all ex | istin' polertics, and of not bavin' cast his vote for no party. On bein' over-1 wbelmin'ly informed by the Dimmoc racy that he had been seen on the prev'ous election to cast his vote for the Republican canderdate, his denial and indignation knew no bounds. 'Then I was dragged into it when I was onsensible,' says he. 'lt was in timerdation ! It was intimerdation at the polls I'he cries. 'No,' says they; 'you walked in onassisted and of your own accord; and, more than that, Aut,' says they, 'you made a boast and a spectacle of it. You Bwung your Herpublican ticket derfiantly in the air, Aut, and then dropped it into the box ' The number of witnesses was over whelmin'. A sad and bedizzened look crept over Aut's face. He give them one last beseechin' gaze, and then turn ed and walked sorrerfully away. 'Gentlemen, it is safe to say that from tbat hour Aut Tilbox was a changed man. 'What is this mystery in science or in natur',' I have heard him say, 'that a man may, onknowin' to him self, commit secb desprit and onnatural deeds? It is solemn and myster'ous, and it bids us pause.' And Ant has forsook the ondue use of cider, and may be seen—yes, gentlemen, he may be seen on any Sunday, arrayed in his 'lection suit and beaver bat, quietly wendin' his way with Mrs. Tilbox down towards the Methodist meetin'- house.' Colonel Sonorous B. Bacon paused. Listening with rapt attention to his narrative, I had long been struggling with the fatal impulse to sneeze. This desire, together with the thrilling close of the Colonel's recital, at length prov ed irresistible. Assuming, as my last resort in this extremity, an air of meek abstraction, I cautiously sought for my pocket-handkerchief. But the Colonel detected the movement. A slow and bitter smile, in which there was more than usual of withering contempt, overspread his features. Lifting his thumb.and forefinger to bis nose, he gave utterance to a blast which startled his audience from their seats, and shook the dishes upon the grocery shelves. When the surcharged atmos phere had cleared a space, the Colonel sat calmly majesticinbißchai^jj'hnA observed fasten The l>ignfty 0 ( (he Hal. The dignity and importance of the hat have never been fully appreciated. The fact that a man may chancre the style of his hat a dozen times with the same suit of clothes tends to show that the covering for the head is treated with less respect than the covering for any other part of the body. There is no apparent reason for this. The fact that a hat, while new, is the favorite article of dress to be bandied about among people who recklessly bet on State elections and horse races does not excuse the disrespect attached to the same hat in the early morning succeed ing election. It has long been a mat ter of regret that such an innocent and inoffensive article of dress should be subjected to the indignity of promiscu ous betting. It is gratifying to see that attempts have been made to give the hat its true dignity. Out in the barbaric wilds of New Mexico a few days ago one Lvnch shot and mortally wounded a gambler in defence of the dignity of the wide sombrero. The details of the affair are unknown, but it is supposed that a dis pute arose concerning the latest style of hat. The gambler probably insinu ated that Lynch's hat was too large for an ordinary umbrella and too small for a circus tent, or the gambler may have expressed surprise that the braid on the outer edge of Lynch's hat should be eight inches wider than a true ap preciation of art would suggest. ' How ever this may be, the dignity of the sombrero was fully sustained and the wild West is satisfied. This method may meet the approval of Mexicans, to whom the width of a hat-rim is almost ss much as a religion, bat io the Ea°t the dignity of the bat mußt be upheld by a special act of some legislative body. A young Philadel phian has partly solved the problem. Some time ago a veteran broker in New York sat down upon the young man's hat. There is no evidence to show that the veteran committed this crime deliberately or maliciously. But the young man was so wrought upon that he immediately entered suit against the broker for damages and re fused to be comforted. The young man may have many good reasons for his action. The bat may have been a new bat; it may have been an only hat, or it may have been the gift of admiring friends. How a lawsuit can heal a broken hat does not seem quite clear, but as the young man's heart and whole ex istence centred in the well-being of his hat the law may do a great deal of good. If the broker had sat down upon the young man, all this trouble might have been averted. As it is, the country will wait breathlessly until the case-hardened broker is sent to Sing Sing for life. The dignity of the hat, and especially the Philadelphia bat, most be respected— Times. Odds and Ends; irglars often make safe robberies at a pleasant dish—The cold shout is meet a great many warm friends |g the heated term. kver mind our tobacco habit: it's lewers. Iwas a sudden imp-pulse which nasti jate the apple. new way to pay old debts' is to Bt.~h and pay them. B'Why do you mark the birth ■f all your friends in your alma- IB —'So as to know when not to I them.' Connecticut man recently said, Hue sl. My wife has left me to advertise that I am not Bible for her debts.' Hman may be able to discount a B the number of smiles on her ■ but he can carry away the ■ the strength of his. Hiever fight under cover,' says Lamar. Evidently the able has never stayed all night resort hotel. dare you say 'damn' before inqired a clergyman of a did I know that you want 'damn' first?' retortad this bad said a long-winded the benefit of posterity." one of his hearers, 'and if H on much longer your audi ■ be here.' Hoor sufferer that has been dos- with so-called Troches nnd upset his stomach without troublesome cough, should advice and use at once Dr. Syrup and get well. gentleman of the lacka- Oscar Wilde type went into a one day last week to get "How do you want ■gs biled ?" asked the waiter. "I ■ them soft." "How soft?" Bsoft, I want them to match my Brishman came running into a Bird and hurriedly cried for a ■ The farmer coming out, de- Bl what he wanted with it, when Bilied that his friend had stuck in and he wanted to dig him out. is he in ?' inquired the farmer. B bis ankles,' said Pat. 'ls that ■aid the farmer. 'Then he can Bmself out again. You'll get no ■ here.' Pat scratching his bead, Ibis face showed evident signs of ■blurted out, 'Och, but the jabers, n head first!' An AKeolSniipliion. uly, this is an age of suspicion, irtheless, Capt. F. M. Howes, of teamcr William Crane, Merchants' liners' Transportation Line be in Boston and Baltimore, who suf -1 severely from rheumatism, caus y the exposure incident to his pro ion, was cured by St. Jacobs Oil. 9 is no suspicion.— Botlon Globe. "Fox's Book of Martyrs" Contains the history and pictures of hundreds of people who were stoned, burned, beaten, pulled to pieces and tortured on account of their conscien tious convictions as to belief and duty- They suffered incredible torment and have come down to the present age as martyrs. It is not now customary to torture people thus, but thov «rp mnde martyrs by rbeumt t'sm until they gaffer almost as much as did the heroes of the martyr ages. There was no re lief for the old-time martyrs, but there is happy relief for those who suffer from rheumatism. Cashier Charles F. Morrill ; of Manchester, N. H., suffered terribly from frequent attacks of this disease, but be has been cured. He writes: "I was a martyr to rheuma tism, and, although I tried many other remedies, I found nothing that reliev* ed me like Perry Davis's Pain Killer." Other rheumatic martyrs may wisely take the hint. Promptly answered: The following advertisement appeared in a daily newspaper recently and was answered by about 500 young men: 'Wanted— Experienced hands on ladies' waists.' How seldom it happens that we find editors bred to the business. * ery, and have yoa not remarked how seldom the business is bread to the editors,' remarked the other. (■ires Entire Satisfaction. As evidence that Foord's Tonic Cor dial is just as efficacious now as it was forty years ago, read the following let ters:— Americus Bell, of Matawan, N. J., Sept. 19, 1881, says: "It affords me pleasure to recommend Dr. Foord's Tonic Cordial. I have used it with greater satisfaction than any like pre paration I haye ever tried." E. T. Goodall, East New York, L. 1., April 5, 1882, says: I regard Foord's Tonic Cordial by far the most effica cious remedy for Diarrhoea and Chol era. It has acted on me as no other remedy ever has, and I would not be without a bottle in the house under any circumstances. W. J. Latba, of University Station, N. C , says 1 have need Edey's Car bolic Troches for the sore throat with the most satisfactory results. 'Aim high,' says Emerson. 'Aim low,' said General Jackson. Which is right? Depends on whether you're aiming at the moon or at a melon theif crawling off on bis bands and knees. 'Ah, Brown! Understand you're going to marry again!' 'Yes my first wife always said 1 was a fool, and so I'm going into matrimony again in order to be consistent, you know.' Babj Elephant. Barnum is overjoyed with his ac quisition—the baby elephant—and de clares $300,000 could not buy it He offers $52,000 for an insurance of the life of the infant for 52 weeks, Surely, if he knew the full value of Peruna and Manalin, be would do no such fool ish thing, as they are the most successful protective medicines that have ever been intro duced to the human family. No one can take any disease while taking Pe runa before each meal, and keeping the bowels regular with Manalin. Ask your Druggist for the book on the "Ills of Life." A London paper announces the birth of "three young children." This is not quite so bad as the action of a newspaper, published not tar from Boa ton, whose editor, baring been inform ed by a joker that a singular phenome non had been noticed in a neighboring town in the Bhape of a baby who had been born without teeth, at once sent out a reporter to investigate the case and write a paragraph thereon. Nparkliut Eye*. Rosy cheeks and clear complexion only accompany good health. Parker's Qinger Tonic better than anything makes pure, rich blood and brings health, joyous spirits, strength and beauty. Ladies try it.— Bazaar. It is told of an old Greek professional philosopher that, when a wealthy citi zen was conducting him through room alter room in his "bouse, where every inch of space was occupied by costlj ornaments, he turned suddenly and spat in bis host's face, explaining by way of apology, that he was compelled to expectorate and that be had chosen the only spot which seemed to bira mean enough for that purpose. A gentleman, who is an invalid, re cenly had occasion to hire a negroo man to wait on him. When aa able bodied applicant for the position put in appearance, the gentleman said: "If I hire you," Sam, I shall expect you to help me up stairs and assist me in get ting into bed." Bress your soul, boss, I'se more fittin' for nelpin' folks up stairs end puttin' 'em to bed den auy fing else; I'se been a porter at a board in' house whar dar was four Senators. I'se de berry niggah you am suflerin' foah." Why continue the use of remedies at only relieve, when Kly's Cream Balm, pleasant of application and & sure cure for Catarrh, Hay Fever and Cold in bead, can be had for 50 cents? Apply into nostrils with little finger. I was troubled with Chronic Catarrh and gathering in my head, was very deaf at times and had discharges from my ears, besides being unable to breath through my nos9. Before the second bottle of Ely's Cream Balm was ex hausted I was cured, and to-day en joy sound health " C. J. Count M, i»23 Chestnut-st., Field Manager Philadel phia Pub. House, Pa. It is no exaggeration. Ely's Cream Balm is a cure for Catarrh, Hay Fever and Cold in the head. Many cases have been cured among my customers. No other remedy has ever equaled the Balm in gocd results. A. J. Ol>kn- WILDER, Druggist, Easton, Pa, NO. 3