St
t
;.-.;,.-', H i'TsI-' 4 'I---
- y , , i . , - ; jilt
iTjt
The whole art ov Government consists in the art of reino honest. Jefferson.
. '
VOL. 4.
STROUDSB URG, MONROE COUNTY, PA., THURSDAY, OCTOBER 5, 1843 : ,"! '
. No 27
-"TV.-- v
TERMS. Two dollars Her annum in advance Two dollar;
and a quarter, half yearly, and if not paid before the end of
ino year, Two dollars-and a half. Those nno receive their
papers bv a carrier or stage drivers employed by ihe proprie
tors, will be chareed 37 1-2 cts. doj1 rear, extra: .
No papers discontinued until all arrearages ire'paid, except
ai me option oi uic bailors.
ID Advertisements not execedinu one square (sixteen lines)
will be inserted three weeks for one dollar, twenty-five cents
inr every snosequent mseition larger ones m proportion. A
uoerai discount win be made to venriy aqverusers.
ID All letters addressed to the Editors must be post paid.
job prijWSito.
Waving a general assortment of fargq'.etegJint plain and orna
meniai 'lype, we arc prcpart-u 10 execute every ues
cription of
Cards, Circulars, Bill Heads, IVotes,
Klank Receipts,
JUSTICES, LEGAL AND OTHER
B&AJYKSt,
PAMPHLETS, &c.
rrintcl with neatness and despatch, oh reasonable tcfVns
AT THE OFFICE OF TITE
Jeffersouiaia Republican. J
From the Lady's Hook for October.
Fuji with Hie Boclor.
BV T. S. ARTHUR.
44 Who is it ?"
44 Doctor Carpus, Miss."
0 fiddlestick on Doctor Carpus! I wih lie
would Mav at home and mind his own busi
ness.
Fhese brief sentences passed between Miss
Mary Mayflower and ihe servant, who had
made her appearance at Mary's chamber door
after aduiiitltig a visitor.
44 Carpus is quite a passable fellow," Jane,
Mary's .sister remarked, smiling a little sarcas
tically. You had better go down and entertain him
then."
4 No, I thank you, Miss ! 1 bttg leave to
decline that honor. His attentions are special,
and my pretty sister Mary is the object of ihem.
1 wish you joy, Mrs Doctor Carpus."
" Now thai is too bad, sis ! 1 declare I will
insult him if you worry me afier that style !"
No, don't do that, Mary. No lady can be
excused lor wantonly insulting a gentleman."
" But what am I to do ? He is intolerable
to me, and yet persists in coming here two or
ihree limes a week. If he would only ask for
you occasionally or, if the girls were at home!
I3ui no 4 Miss Mary Mayflower!' is the
word, and I must parade myself down, and en
dure Ins nitle-tatile for an hour. I wish I'd
sent word down that I was not at home."
J i 1 - - , j
auc so ourueneu your conscience witn a j
1
lie.'
'Exactly !
That's ihe rub."
4 No no sis. That is not the remedy,
Say thai you are engaged if you do hoi wish i
to see hun.
4 I'm not too much engaged to sec company.
fo that would he as much a lie as the oilier.""
' Say then, lhai you cannot be seeti. Base
your actions on the iruth and abide there."
IM 1 f , 4 '
" I iiul f:)v tf'firiiitih In miUici lint twit .
., I
It would be easy eiiouah for Alary May
i'.uver, if she once set her head that way. My j
l ! r nil! 1 liMlifii'n in tit. Vtit,it fif uinnnitui .
... hallway measures, or to ask what may b!
i .e result of an action, if she feels much incli-L
a.. .. i . . ..i . .i...
juwiiii iu uu .i. ou x musi cwnciuut: uitu lucre
:ire some attractions aboui Doctor Carpus a'fter
mi.
44 Oh, of course ! Some wonderfully strong
attractions!" returned Mary, half-laughing, half
M'xed, as she left ihe room to attend Doctor
Carpus below.
Good evening, Doctor!"
44 Good evening, Miss Mary !"
Were said with a forced smile of pleasure on
one side, and a real smile on the other. "Then
tame, ' f '
4' It is a delightful evening." " '-
44 Yes, beautiful." . ,
44 The air is as soft and balmy asMdy.".
..ii
lately."
4 The finest I ever remember to have known."
A pause.
"How beautiful the evening'sky is"!" resumed
Carpus, clequently 44 The' moon is brilliant,
;d the stats shine with' an unusual lus'tre.
Mar.", Jupiter and Saturn, are all above the
liorizott. It is rare ijideed, lhat oui firmainenl
:s st ricJily sludded
witn getns.
44 Rarely iudce,d."
14 Have you mei with NichojV Arcliilecture
rK : i ?
"Xo sir."
.speaking, of Salitrn, reminds frnc . of the
Toluaie. 1 d.jn'i know when I hare, been "more
interested in .i w'orje. His nebular hypothesis
l" most admi rably sustained. By it, the rins
TSa'lirn are. more satisfactorily accounted for
ihan hy any other Theory 1 have met. Like
wise, the '.odkca I lights, comrits, systems of
mars th zl tteluiloiis masses that lie far ofl
an. ihe almost itifinite depths of 'space, and
only ditaly rvaludly jh aid of pov erful tel
usc"op?6; inact tlie wl?ole'. universe' oT siins
and ars.,f ' '
u musi bo ataUwclTvc vohiriie."
44 xceedh.giyo to tho sludent
of muural' science. "TtfTnelt has'beSn a'feast
is something that lifts a man out of himself
that carries himup. as it were into the seventh
heaven of his mind. Something that reveals
the divinity within him."
As Dr. Carpus, whom the reader ought to
know, was a young M. D., with a diploma six
months old, handsomely framed and hung up
conspicuously in his office, said this, he could
not help rising from his chair, and taking a turn
or two across the floor, at the same time that
his right hand. sought his forehead, and brushed
back the long hair, to reveal its (the forehead's)
ample (in his mind) dimensions. As this is a
very good place to say it,H might as well come
in here, that Doctor Carpus was a young man
of twenty-two, who had a good conceit of him
self. He had graduated, after a regular course
of three vears' instruction, with more credit ac
cording to his own" idea than anv other student
al the University. It is true, that the Profes
sors of Chemistry and Anatomy, if asked their
opinion of the matter, might have given a dif
ferent testimony. Still Carpus was sincere.
Ho really thought he had graduated with distin
guished honor.
The good conceit of himself which thus led
lim into a false estimate of his worth in this re
spect, accompanied him in all other matters.
In opening his office, he had no doubt but that,
in the course of a very short time, he would be
overrun with business, csix mouins experi
ence rather made his mind waver in regard to
his, when a friend suggested, that it was next
to impossible for an unmarried physician to
succeed. He must have a wife to add weight
to his professional importance. The hint was
at once taken, and Doctor Carpus began to look
around for some one whom he would be willing
to take as a partner. In considering this mat
ter, he laid it down as a governing rule in the
case, that Mrs. Carpus must be rich and beau
tiful. Among the large circle of his acquain
tances, no one struck his fancy so completely
as Miss Mary Mayflower. Her father was re
puted to have no small share of this world's
goods, and as for Mary, she was called a beau
ty everywhere. Mary ?Jayflower became,
therefore, the object of his particular attentions,
greatly to the sprightly maiden's annoyance.
Thus much, and now we will go on with our
story. The Doctor after taking a few digni
fied turns across the floor, resumed his seal '
near Mary, and started a new theme of dis
course, in which he could show ofl to advan
tage. At last tie thought it time to retire, and
i... .t i.:u.,; u...i. i, i....! i.. ..r
ICl U1U CMtlUillUM n iii; nan indue 11 Jlllll- ;
lf have u& j . j j
, 1
Thank Heaven ! he has none at last." ex- i
claimed Mary, gliding into the room where her j
sister Jane sat reading. 1 declare, he is the
most conceited, egotistical fellow 1 ever had the
t misfortune lo tneel! He is downright intoler
able to me."
44 lleigh-ho! And is that the way you speak
of an absent lorer ?" 'Jane returned, laughing
"lill I .
O
"Lover! Don t talk of a lover to ne, or li
shall lose alt patience
4 Why don'i you send him off, then ?"
44 How can I send him off? I treat him
as
cu d can' ,bullhe d" 1 taku " ,
1 atiribmes to lovo s shrink
1 ing einbanassmeni.
4 Hold your tongue will you, Jane!"
44 11a ! Ha ! keep cool, my pretty bis !"
44 How can 1 keep cool under such an an
noyance. To be beset in this way by a con
ceited young upstart of a doctor, is loo much."
44 People are already beginning to set ii down
as a match," chimed in the fun-loving sister.
44 Indeed, Jane, that is too much!" Mary now
said gravely. 44 Who has made any allusion lo
it"
n 0 as to that, hundreds for wliai I know."
4 No, but tell me one'
44 Sarah Mortimerinsimiated as much the
last rime I saw her?'
44 Sarah' Mortimer did !"
44 Yes', certainly. And' I don'i see any thing
so very surprising in it. The inference is nat
ural enough," replied Jaiie, with provoking
calmness. '
44 Now isn't' all this too much for any one to
endure ! Why. I wouldn't have my name cou.
pled with that of Doctor Carpus, for any con
sideration in the world. It's a' downtighi in
sult. The fact is, I'll ofTentl him th'e next time
he conies here, and so put an tiud to the mat
ter." 4 No Mary, you must not do thai."
44 Yes, but ! will, tlie conceited fool !"
44 Mary Mary!" Jan sai.t in a soothing
lone, 44 don't get so oxritqd. about a mere trifle
like this. ' Wait patienily until the declaration
comes,.; and "then rcfr him to Pa, who will send
Hlrii off of course with a flea in his ear."
44 Indeed, then, and I won't do any such
thing. I'll' insult him",". returned the excited
matdon.
Thjs and much more passed between the
sis.t'crs before they retired to rest for the night.
v)n the iext day, Mr. and Mrs. Mayflower left
Boston, o be gone a couple of weeks, leaving
their two daughters to keep house in their ab
sence. Among the other members of ihe fam
ily was' a pretty Iittlo Spanish1 poodle, who was
,.,J .i i . :.......al'. :..
by no. means the least itp'por'iani; personage jn
the house. It so happened a day or two after
the departure of the old folks, that Fido was
accidentally thrown down stairs, in consequence
of which one of his fore-legs was pretty badly
hurt. A fter ihe alarm that followed this serious
accident had subsided, and Fido, with his leg
bandaged, was laid upon the sofa, Mary, into
whose mind a bright" thought suddenly intruded
itself, exclaimed ' ( ' .
44 if I don't' do it, my name is not Mary May
flower !" ' , . 'i
4'Do what, sis!" Jane asked, looking,upjn
surprise.
"4i l mean to have some fun with the doctor."
44 What doctor ?"
44. Doctor Carpui." , .-. t ,
44 How 1n ,.(
44 I'm going to send for him professionally."
"Mary!"
44 1 am. Fido needs a physician, and I don't
know any one who would be so likely to under
stand his case as the learned Doctor Carpus."
Why Mary Mayflower ! Are vou crazy?"
4 0 no. But I'm serious. The young man
wants practice, and I feel a benevolent wish to
advance his interests."
44 It would be a capital joke !" Jane 6aid, so still further confounded to find a lawyers note
amused at the idea, that she could not relain-a on his desk, setting forth, that he, the said law
grave countenance. yer, had been instructed to bring suit on a cer-
44 Ii will be a capital joke, for I'll do it this
very day."
44 Bui will you see him V
44 Certainly I will and look as solemn
as
the grave."
It was, perhaps, an hour after, thai Doctor
Carpus sat conversing with a young fellow prac
titioner, in regard to future prospects. Carpus
was very sanguine, especially in respect to the
impression he was evidently making upon the
heart of Mary Mayflower. In the midst of this
conversation a messenger came in great haste
with a note. He opened it and read
44 Please call at Mr. Mayflower's in haste!",
44 Has any thing serious happened?" the doc
tor asked in an anxious voice.
But the messenger hail already disappeared.
4 That looks well, don'i it," Carpus remark
ed to his friend with a sell-satisfied air. 44 1
shall feather my nest there, certainly. But I
must go immediately. Nothing the matter with
Mary, i hope."
In a few minutes after Doctor Carpus step
ped Irom his office, he stood at the door of Mr.
Mayflower's dwelling. "The servant who ad- red in-'pretty plain bul respect ful-lang"tiage, set
mitted him, directed him with a sertous air to , ting forth the nature and eflents of the nracti-
oo un into ihe front ehmnhfir. With a miir-.L.
o i . -i -t
quiet slop he ascended the stairs, lapped light-
i ...... I ' t. . i ! i.i i -
T al lilc chamber door, and then opened it soft
a,m l'assiid '" 1 ne room was partially dark-
eueu ; out noi so niucn ooscureu that he uiu
not at once perceive Mary seated near the bed,
upon which lay the unfortunate poodle, with a
thick bandage about one of his fore-legs.
44 Has any thing serious occurred?" asked
the doctor, as he paused and looked into Ma
ry's sober, anxious face.
41 Nothing very serious, I hope, Doctor. But i
I we hate been dreadfully frightened. Poor Fi
do fell down a whole flight of stairs, and has
hurl himself very badly, I'm afraid. 1 did nol
know what to do, father and mother being away,
and so 1 sent immediately for you."
j For a few moments Doctor Carpus hardly
i knew where he was, Or what to sav Or do. It
was plain serious as Mary seemed, thai slie
was quizzing hun; and that she had chosen a
method to annoy and mortify him, of all others
ihe most effectual. Vain aiid solf-importan'l as
he was, his character had in it a spice of deci
sion anu firmness, lie was likewise proud
spirited, and this determined' him nol to exhib
it a portion of the surprise and indignation that
ho felt. Turning coolly lo the bed he removed
ihe bandage from Fido's leg, and carefully ex
amined it, much to 'tho pain of the poor 'dog,
vho uttered a' cOustatii succession of distressing
cries. He then replaced the bandage more
carefully,' and' ordered ihal said bandage be
kept constantly wet with vinegar. A prescrip
tion was written and handed to Mary, with di
rections how to administer the medicine. Bow
ing' then gravely and uith a dignified profes
sional air, he promised to call punctually on
the next rooming, and then departed.
In t lie morning he came about ihe same hour
entered with perfect composure bowed to
Vlary, who was in the sick chamber, with a
courteous smile, and then turned to look after
his patient, whom he pronounced better. Ano
ther prescription was written, and again the
physician departed. This was continued for a
week, adiy to the annoyance of Mary, who,
however, kepi up her assumed character as
perfectly as did the doctor. By this lime Fido
could run about as usual, and as the doctor still
called in regularly, Mary had to request him to
suspend his professional visits', as their little
pet seemed quite rsslored.
Doctor Carpus bowed and smiled courteous
ly at this, and then left the house. Of course,
Mary was never after troubled with his com
pany. It happened about six months afterwards,
when :ho whole story had gone the rounds, and
Doctor Carpus had beeiaunoyed by ii to his
hearts content, that a. collecior steppiid inlo(Mr.
Mayflower's store and presented' a bill p; two
hundred dollars, for medical attendance in his
family. .. .
41 But' I don't owe Doctor Carpus any th'n'g.
He has" never practised in my fahiily.' What
does he 'mean, pray, by sending'me a bill"
44 1 know nothing about it," the collector re
plied. " He gave mn thebill amongst others,
and -asked me to present it." .. ,.
:'Ul&Yer.y; strange-! - He never visited my
family professionally." , -
" Whaf shall I say to him4, Mr. Mayflower V
" Tell him thai 1 sity 1 "don't owe him any
thing, and "am surprised' at his jVrds'iimihg' to
send me a bilL"
Very well sir." And the collector with
draw. An hour after, he returned with a now and
more explicit bill. It called for two hundred
dollars' for 44six visits and medicine, tn dog Fi
do." As soon as he fead it, Mr, Mayflower
became very angry, and said some hard things
about Doctor Carpus. When he had cooled
i off a little, the collector formally demanded the
(bill, and was, as formally, told it) go about his
j business, and that right speedily,
On the next morning, Mr. Mayflower was
lain claim, fiillv expressed, in favor of Doctor
Carpus. $ ,
Here, then, the matter began to assume a
rather scrioux form. A lawyer was consulted,
who assured htm that Carpus could not possi
bly recover the amount claimed, although he
was legally untitled to regular fees for his ser
vices, which would undoubtedly, be awarded
him. But, as the prosecution of the suit would
necessarily lead to an unpleasant exposure of
his daughter, who, if he defended the case,
would be called into court to give evidence, the
lawyer seriously advised the incensed old gen
tleman to settle the claim,, unjust and exorbT
lant.as it was, and so getclear of the whole
matter.
It took old Mr. Mayflower some days to
make up his mind to pay the bill. Finally,
however, ihe tears and entreaties of poor Mary
prevailed, who had a "dreadful fear ofbeing call
ed into court. Her fun with th'e doctor brought
the laugh upon the wrong side.
About a week after the claim wad settled, a
letter was received from Doctor' Carpus, couch
i cal ioke which the voumr ladv hrtd nlavod nfi
i j j o . i j
upon him, and alleging thai as she had enjoyed
l i:..i- .i? . i
a iittlo fun al his expense, it was no more than
fair thai he should pay off the score in her own
coin. In conclusion he referred to two one
hundred dollar bills which he had enclosed, and
staled, that as he had no legal right to them, he
could not retain them. He had succeeded in
making the parly who provoked him to institute
a mock-suit, sensible of her folly, and there ho
was willing to let the matter drop; trusting.
that when, next she took it into her head to
have some fun with the doctor, she would think
twice before she acted once. And here .'the
matter ended, leaving both Doctor Carpus and
Mary (M ay flower somewhat wiser from having
read, quite, aiiKuiively a-new leaf to them in the
book of human life
JCpigraizi. '
Tom carries a straw in his pocket,
Through which cool mini juleps lie sips;
And swears to hi3 temperate friends, J(l ,
- .He ins more puts a glass to his lrps. '.
Western IDIooimcce.
The following extract, from a speech of a
western lawyer, we find m the Wheeling Ga
zelle. It is a capital burlesque: "The law
expressly declares, gentlemen, in tho beautiful
language of Shaksp'eare, that where no doubt
exists ol the guilt of the prisoner, it is your dti
tytpjean on the side of justice, and fetch him
in inrfocenf. If you keep this fact in view, in
the case of nn: client, gentlemen, you will have
ihe honor of making a friend of him, and all his
relations,' aifd you can allors look upon this oc
casion, and reflect with pleasure, that you did as
you have been done by. But if, on tho other
hand, voir disregard this principle of law, and
set at naught my eloquent remarks;' and fotch
him in guilty, the silent twitches of conscience
will follow ybu all over every fair cornfield, 1
reckon, and my injured anil down-irodden cli
ent will be apt to light on you one of these
dark nTgliis, ds my cal lights on a sasserfull ofl
new milk I
The J3oton correspondent of the New Or
leans Picayune says . 44 There was found a
moiig.the pppers of Mr. Chandler, of this city,
who went, last fall, to South Carolina, for his
health, and died there- in .May, the following
original jepitaph, which he desired should be
the only inscription over his grave, and which,
I ihink,"?is enough in a nutshell !"
?4My name, my country, what are thoy to thee b
,What,tny estate, or what. rny; pedigree 1 ..m
Suffice ft, stranuer, thai thou see'at a tomb- A
Thou know'st its use,-jihides-n.Q tnatter whom V,'
UIr Adasns' HEoliscr; i
On the return of John Q. Adams from hT'
western tour, he was welcomed with Teaicu
thusiasm by the inhabitants of Pitufield, Ma-?.
and addressed by George N. Brings, shj Wju'i;
candidate for Governor of thai State, who,, at?
ter adverting to the eminent -services f Mr:
Adams, paid to his mother a deserved and beau
tiful tribute. In reply, Mr. A. said: 44 When-a.
"man hears his mother thus spokeu'of tiefWr frt
fellowcitizenl, it is efiough'io make ilfiRfcin
sink within him for joy; and if 1 am wnhjjf
a tfthe.of th nraise thai has bftui lrtsW's?rtd
I inn 11 niH. it iv rui-intr tn flint nintli V "
'Woman's Smiles.
A woman's smile it the best charity hctfini
a man can receive. It opens one's pur.-n'.:t(ml
makes you bless the receiver m the bacgatiU.
Woman forever begging ii tliey want you t
go to a ball, a party, get up a fair, arid wotkl!
laugh you out of a dollar, they are sure to je't
it. Is a missionary scheme on foot a cbnrch
to decorate, a bail room to fit up";vbeware tif a
woman's' smile; if you meaiti to give iioik.
run as if the plague were invading the eot&try;
or you aro a gone case.
Great ILonsevisy.
Died, in Baltimore, on Saturday the Gih inst.,
Mrs. Elizabeth Margaret Gros, at the advanced
age of 1 12 years. During her life, she enjoyed
uninterrupted health, having nevrr taken any
medicine, or having any attendance, Horn a phy
sician, until three years since, when she had a
fall and broke her arm, which she was able :'
use again in a
few weeks. She was followed
to the
grave
by, her descendants to the firth
generation.
The President's name is honor and imegriiy."
says the Madisoniau. 44 My name i-s Norval !"
said a runaway youth who was playing thai
character in a small theatre, al Annapolis; some
years since. "You lie, you dog," said an offi
cer in the crowd, "your name is Bill Brown,
and you owe Mrs. Knipper three dollars and a
half for boarding and wnsTiing and here's a
writ; ao come along, my darling' -
'"- Eouisvillc Journal.
Fleas! exclaimed a. landlord indignanrFv;
there's not a single flea in my house. I don't
believe there is, 'said tje 'victimized lodger,
they are all maftiedVandMiafe1fncoinm6n large
families.
Never enter a sick room -in a state of por
spiration, as the moment you become coohyour-;
pores absorb. Do not approach contagious'
diseases wiih an empty .stomach: nor sit be
tween the sick and ihe fire, because the heat
attracts the thin vapor.
They catch fish at Towanda creek by ma-,
king them jump into a boat. By representing
the shadow of the boal in the water in such a"'
way as to make it appear to the fish anf ob
struction, limy jump to avoid it. A pike weigh
ing 20 lbs. was caught iu this way lately.
?3auure in Sables.' 1 '
We find the following useful suggestions in a1
late Euglislt Paper :
44 It is well known lhat in a close st.nhle
where there is a good many horses, there is a
very pungent smell, affecting the eyes and nose,
more particularly when the stable is being
cleaned out. This smell is occasioned by'thes
flying off of ammonia, which is the very,e,s
sence and value of manure, and which volatili
ses or flies offa:l a very low temperature, eveif
the warmth of the manure in a stable will' semi5
it off,- and it goes off in greai quantities,' bv'tho
common heal of the manure iu a facm yawl
when thrown up in heaps or not. There is;
however, a very cheap and simple remedy for
this. Before you begin to clean out )Wr sta
bles' dissolve some common. salt in water';- if'a
four horse stable, say "four, pounds of salt dissol
ved in two buckets of water and poured thro',
the nose of a watering pan over the stable fiqor,
an hour or so before you begin to move the ma
nure, and the volatile salts of ammonia will be
como fixed salts, from their having united Willi
the muriatic -acid of the common salt, and ttho
soda thus liberated from the salt, will, quickly,
absorb carbonic of soda ; thus you will , retain,
with your manure ihe ammonia which .would
other wise have flown away, and you have "also
a new and most important agent thus introduced;
viz: the carbonic of soda. -As this is a most
powerful-solvent of all vegetable fibre," ami see
ing that all manures have to bo rendered. solu
ble before they can act on vegetation, wiil.be
at once apparent that the carbonate of soda so
introduced must be a powerful aiid valuable a-
gont.
The late Fair at Iitchester. N. Y must haw
been an immense affair. Ii is estimated that
there wer6 al loasi four thousand wheeled car
riages there, and len thousand horses, and in
the show ground some sixty Durham bulls,
twenty stud horses, several hundred sheep and
hogs, n thousand horses of all 'kinds,-fcj.
Eleven -hundred satdown to tho'-ArfcultUMl1