• .
•
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,
T. -- - - '. • '-'- . . --7-----------. 7
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• • i , . .
1 .
‘. HOLCOMB' &LTRACY,TRACY,r." •II Publishers.
, • ~ ~. - : - . -
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•
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-At() T-44 yr'. . - : - .
. . _ . , „..
.
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no• , . _ , .
-TUE- ,
Railroad I r ime.:rablea., -
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fi_ ra df or ti_ ppublicaa.LEl4,lw
:
lotit . i a lA i l l L P ß E CT:t a li.
API D
IL I U " I.
ARRANGEMENT OF PASSENGER TRAINS.
..,- ' *. . TO TAM: EFFECT JAN. Ist, 1882. '
, I.; Pablished Every Thursd a y,
EASTWARD. •:- - • •
...
AT TOWANDA., PA., BY
L I
STATIONS. 15 9 , 1 1 : ' I.
.HOLCOMB & TRACY. , . , .
. _.......,....._. ..4,.....•••
i .
- • P.M. A.M. A.M. .01.
' $(..70 Per Annum, in Adrance. - , =sza Vane ' 2.05 7.'20 7.15
o • 2.50 8. 9.20
Rochester ' ' .... 5.15 10;05 '
' •
. Lyons 640 11.05 ..... i'....
.I,trertisiliff Rates-Six cents a line for. first Geneve
6.55 11.301 ..... ..:'..
. o .,•rtion., , an 1 five cents per line for all subse- Ithaca. 8.33 1.00.
~u,..n t insertions. Reading notice advertising Auburn 5.1511.05
, cents per line. Eight lines constitute a 4eue
..
Owea.... • ........... ..•• a5O 1.35
t :z
9.10 1.45 9.00 345
..,,,,,,re. and twelve lines an inch. , Auditor 's Waverly I 9.45 2.1 9.40 416
E A•eiv $2.5e. Administrator's and Executor's Sayre llO.l 2.3010.00 4.30
;;obese $2. 0 •). Yearly advertising $1,7100 per Athens . 120.1 10.05 4.34
• 10.15
o.laum. • Meter ' 10.25 ..
Tot:ltxruntac.e6 is published in the 'lacy, goweed,.... 1046 3.00 1 1043 505
.I,, o 'is and Nobles Block, at the corner of Main 14. 7 7 4anh1ng 10.54 5.13
~.,..1 Pine streets, over J. F. Corser's Boot and Psi/ding Mane _ e.. 11.03 '
, numnterfield • ..... U.lO 5.26
..1,,,e store. Its circulation le over 2000.. Assn p renc h town
- 11.19 '
,dc,rtislng medium it IS unexcelled in its ha- Wyaltising • ' 3.3811.30 6.43
;nralste fielli 1 Sayville ...c' ' '.. 11.42 3.5711.50 6.03
-- -
iltnners -may 111.53 6.07
- -,--- -
~- - - - Koshoppen ' 4.1212.10 6.23
7:7:anda',llsinest Direci:r-y-.. blehoopany.. • ' .•:_fdL2.l6 6.28
-4 Funkhannock . , 12.23, 4.35 1.00 7.10
• - 1 LaGrange 1 , 1 1,10 7.20
A TTORA RI'S-AI-LAW. Falls 4 1 1.24 7.35
, I. & B Junction .... '....... 1.051 3.101 1. 45 8.05
~ N ttril ~ , F. HICLIS. -Attorneys-at-Law; Odic Wilt et-Barre.... ... . : ..... 1.35: 5.30, 2.20 8.35
n ~,,,,,lu,t ra i s-. (to. ; . . Mauch Chunk 3.451 7.35 1 4.60 11.00
..,• _----- - 4.44 1 , 8.29: 5.33 12.00
14- . •
rIAUFF. IPS:, Office In Wood's Block, south Bethlehem 5.00 i 8.45' 6.0512.15
V - First c: . tional Bank, u p stairs . June 12,18 Easton 5.30: 9.00 1 8.40 1 12.55-
. . ,
8.051 1 9.16 3.35
r-,-;Bitili & SON (N C Elsbree and L. Elsbree.) New York
FJ suffix.. in :',POrcur Mock. Park St. may 14.78 Arld. P.M. PM . p.u.l
1
P - ----
ECI: k tATIVTON (Benj .V Peck and D A Over-
WESTWARD. •-••
f--.n. Office over Rill's Market 49.'79
'`
---- ,'•-_
.(111...1tT0N k SANDERSON (E Overton and Jan
NJ FSe.rulerson.) Office in Adams Block.,j ulys' 78 S T ATIONS. 1 8 130 2 1 -19 .
- - -- '6'.
AA AXWELL, 11'.11. Office over Dayton's Store ------.- -=--
31-,
- 1P.M.?4..4.M.1P.M .
.0/.. -.' april-14,76 New York
0.301.... 1.40 3.40
---
Tryit T, J. ANDREW. Office in Mean's Block. Philadelphia 8.(H) ; .... 9.00 4.15
- • • Easton - - 9.2C' .... 10.16 5.50
l''' . ape 14 ; 78 . .
Bethlenem .
9,50 .. 10.45, 6.15
-- Allentown...,.
1 - NAVIES, CARNOCHAN & BALL. ( W r Darin.... .. t0.05...:;!10.54 6.24
LI ir ll carneelan. L M fla/L) Office in rear lifnuch Chunk •. 11 - 05 , -'• • •11 1 - 5 5 7.25
.-f Ward House. Entrance on Poplar St. (je12,75 Wilkes-Barre • I.oB' 7:30; 2.03 9.45
I. & B Junction 1,35 8.01 1 2.25.10.10
it,TEP.Crit, RODNEY
_A. Solicitor of Patents. Falls . . • ..• 8.27 ....10.32
ILL Particular attention paid to business in LaGrange . .... 8.45 .... 1 10.48
nri , lins' Court and to the settlement of estates. Funkhannock 2.15' 8,551 3.01 10.52
,441, , ,;1u Montanye's Block 49.79 liehoopany .............t... .... 9.201 ....111.22
' Meshoppen ;9.27i 3 . 2 111.29
- Tiff c PHERSON A: YOUNG, (L McPherson and 'Skinner's:Eddy ' .... .9.431 - . - ..,111.45
.1.1%i w. I. Young.) Office south side of Mercur's Lachyville ..,. 3, 1
•02 9 50' 3• 46 1 11• 50
D'.,n.t. . feb 1,78 Wyalusing '
~.. ....10.14_.4.03112.07
- -
7,II•ADILL :: KINNEY. Office corner Main and Rummertleld ; 10.371 .•. ( 112.24
-.IYI
pine et. Noblks block, second door front. Standing Stone . ..-10.441 - ... 12.30
Collections promptly attended to. feb 178 Wysanking 10.54 1 1 1 112.37
Towanda 3.59110 L, 443,12.46
-ry, it..LIA)IB, ANGLE d: BUFFINGTON. (11 N m i t er 11.17 1 4.55 . 12.57
VII iraliams. E J Angle and E.D Bugngton). Kit = ,
. ....111.261..... 1.06
ie.. o west side of Main street, two doors north Athens 4.3011.311 5,10 1.15
,I Argus cites. All business entrusted to their sayre,, 4.40, 1 11.411 5.20 1.23
care will rective prompt Attention. ' oct 28,77 Waverly - 4.45 1 11.501 5.30 1.30
f . Elmira • 5.25112.40' 6.15 .2.15
y 111 Li 11. AND JOIIN I W. CODDING,'Attor- Owego ....-...... 5.3'1 ....I 6.25 ....
e) Drys and Counsellors•at-Law. Office in .the Auburn
XI- rcur Block, over C. T. Kirby Drug Store. Ithaca • - -.:. 6.10 t ....I 6.40 ....
,
July3,' 'BO U. Geneva 7.411 ....I 8.14 ..'..
EENEY. J. P. Attorney-at -Law.- Office. in Lyeas 8.401 .... 8.50 ....
Reichester 9.501 8.10, 9.40 ....
11. Moutanye's Block, 'Slain Street.
S, pt. :5. 'sl-tf. '' .. Buffalo ...., ........ ... -. 1 11.40, 6.10'12.05, 8.00
1
Niagara Falls 1.031 9.251 1.061 9.40
, P.M. P.M. A.M. A. 31
_
mil4iMP:ioN, W. a.Land E. A., Attoruc)lß-at
Law. Thwanda, Pa. Office to Mercur Block,
r c."r. Kirby's Drug Store, entranen on Main
•tr., , t. first stairway north of Post.dffiee. All
hu.m..ss promptly attended to. Special atten
u,.o given to clailns against the United States
r Pcusioi.s, Bounties, Patents, etc., - and to
:•.11,tious and settlement of decedent's es tea.
April 21, ly
lIENRY B. MIKEAN;
ATTORNEYAT-LANI
1 •
sa:ioltor of :Patents. Government claims
. at ,
t,l:dtcl to. 11t1eb82
r---
PHISICANS AND SURGEONS.
ToIINSON. T. 8., M.D. Witco over Dr. H. C
41 Porters's Drug Stoie. _ fob 12,0
ON, Drs .1). N. &F. G. Office st Dwelling
L' 4 on River Street, corner Weston St. feb 12,77
T ki.ll, C. R.. M.D. Oaks Ist door above old
bank building. on Main street. Special at
ttatiou given to diseases of the throat and
Ju1y19,78
oDBUTtN, S. M., M.D. Office and rest
W
,fence. Main street, north of M.E.Church
lit.dical Examiner for Pension Dcrartment.
fab
110.11 - NE, E. b.. 11. D. Office over 31 , mtanyo's
: , tore. Office boars from 10 to 11 3.4. and
fr , :a to 4P. Y. Special attention given to
I.l,ases of the Eye, and Diseases of the Ear.
oct 20,77
rpowNElt, H. L., M.D..
Ho' aOPATIIIC PUYSICLOT k StrSOWN..
-1 , 1 , /eIICII and °Mee just north of Dr. Corbon's
street. Athens. Ps.
HOTELS. -
DIEN itY LiOLTSE. main it..' next coiner isonta
f Bridge- street'. New house anfpinew
tarfitture throughout. • The proprietor. has
spared neither pains or expense in makikkg his
k,:acl first-class and respectfully solicits a'ahare
ruhhe patronage. Meals at all hours. Terms
n•a4eLable. Large Stable attached. .
carWM. HENRY.
SECRET SOCIETIES.
WATKINS POST. NO. GB, O. A. B. Meets
.Nery Saturday eveniutt. at Military Hall.
OEO. r:MYER„ Commander.
4. It. ErmcIDGE, Adjutant. ' feb 7, 79
CLODGE. NO. 57. Meets at S. of P
Hall. every Monday evening at 7:30. In
wane, s2.ouu. Benefits $3.00 per week. Aver
age annual coat, 5 years experience, $ll.l -.
J. R. KITTBIDGE, Reporter.
JE,I. WARDELL, JR, Dictator. feb 22.78
BRADFOGD LODGE, N 0.167, I. O. O.F. Meet
ft: odd Fellow's Hall, every Monday evening
L:' f,Moek. WARREN Rum, Noble Grand.
jUlle 11,75
110L - SE AND SIGN PAINTING
POST. F. E. No. 32 Second street AU order§
sill receive prompt attention. June 12,75
EDUCATIONAL
czn4yrEil ANNA COLLEGIATE INSTITUTE
The Second Winter Term will begin Monday
iaLuary, •,!J. 15.12. For catalogue or other infor
matlou, address or call on the Principal.:
EDWIN E. QUINLAN, A. M.
Towanda,
•
PLUMBER AND GAS FITTER
1171LLIAM3, EDWARD. Practical Plumber
v and Gte Fitter. Place of business in /der
zgr I'd Eck next door to , Journal office opposite
lUblic sputre. Plumbing: Gas Fitting, Repair
. 44 Pumps of all kinds, and all kinds of Gearing
roraptly attended to. All wanting work in his
Le 6:Iola& give him a call. - July 27.77
IXSURANCI.
R -
C. S. General Insurance Agency.
/% 0 TowauSs. P. Oalco in Whitcomb's Book
store. July
SPECIA L ANNOIIINEXENT
JAMES McCABE
11,1 ,MOVED INS GROCERY BUSINESS 0
c4)l TR }AST CORNER or item
STREETS', WHERE
ILL 11.13 EsT BUSHED
Read Quarters
FOR EN' runic) IN THE LINE OF
UREfIIEB • PlB'llBlBl3,
&c.,
CASH PAID for Desirable Pro
-34( Fine BUTTER acid EGGS
a Bpi cillt3
Aptil 24 17
NATHAN TIDD,
tSuccesitor to Mr. McKean,/
DEAL= IN
PITTSTON WILICESBATME
AND LOYAL SOCK
0 A LI
-IDOT or PDTE STREET, NEAR cOIIRT HOUSE.
- TOWANDA, PA,
1 .
LO WEST MUM roie eAsa.
CentrTha Patronage of ray aid Meads n4d rano
ally la solicited. We • 80
• ,
,
t tZ
A
- Yr.• • . _
,c fir 14 4 ., /
•
)1,
t l l %.
s erSli A Ar -
•
No. 32 leaves Wysluaing at6:oo, A. M., French.
Man 6.14, Ruzinnerfteld 6423, Standing Stone 6.31
Wrsanking 6.40. Toasiida 6.53, Mater 7.06,
Milan 7:16, Athena 7:25, 1 , Sayre 7:40, Waver
ly 7:55, arriving at Elmira-8:50., A. M.
No. 31 leaves Elmira 5:15' Waverly 6:GO,
Sayre 6:15, Athens 6:20, Milia - 6 30,ftllsteir 6:40,
Towanda 6:55, Wyaauktng 7:05, Standing Stone
7.14, Ilummertield 1:22, Frenchtown 7:32, arriv
ing at Wyaltuling at 735., P. M. ~.
Trams 8 and 15 r , il , . daily. -:Sleeping cars on
ir t . z
trains 8 and 15 between .N agars Falls and Phila
delphia and betwien Lyo s and New York with
out changes. Parlor ca ou Traine 2 and 9
between Niagara Falls d Philadelphia with
out change, and throe h coach to and from
Rochester via Lyns.
, WM ; ' EVERSON, Supt.
Suns, Pa.. Jan. 2, 11162 Pa, & N. Y. R. li.l
TOWANDA, P4A.
Mtscellaneks Advertisement:.
Towanda - s:t_ Store
s prepared to offer a complete assort
ment of " -
DRY AND FANCY GOOK
Crockery, Glassware,
•
MAJOLICA WARE,
BIRD CAGES,
- SATCHELS, &C.
For the coming timing Trade, we
adhere as heretofore to our established
principle—that a quick sale witiva small
profit is better than a slow one , With'a
large profit—and therefoie our prices
in- any line of goods will compare
favorable with the prices of any other
house.
Dom" We endeavor to "sell the best
article for the least possible money.
LOEWUS & FREIMUTH.
my64f
T. MUIR . & C6.'S
GROCERIES
The place to SIM Morley b onying cheap la at
Oorater Mats and Elsalin =lriaate.
They roopoottally announce so the' poblio that
they 14!" a Isrie stock of
FLOUR. FEED. 'MEAL. .01141121. BALT. FISII
PORK. and `PROVIIIONS generally.
We have also added to our utak a isiiet7 of
WOODEN WARZ, andrair WM= . 7tlllll. FIB
Just rewired a large stock of Ousts. Teas,
Coffees, Spices, MOIMAION'S PURE SOAP, the
best In the market, and other :sakes of soap
Syrup and Molasses. :which they offer at low
prices for Cash. .- - oct 26 77
BESTbusinem now Wore the public. Ton
ant make mony lister at work tor us
than at anything else. Capitol not
needed. We will start you. si2 a day and up.
wards needs at borne by the industrioni. Kan.
women. boys and girls wanted everywhere to
work for us. Now is the time.:. You can•work
in
spare time only or give your, whole time to the
troainses. Ton am- live st hoineand do the work
No oilier business will pry you nearly as well
one eau fell to maks enormous gay by en•
qat oum costly Outfit and terms tree.—
i i 11 11 2 ,111010 fest.= %at o ll o .. = mune ;
Dec° Thl3s--
UMA:MENTAL JOB PRINTING
sweat/ at the Ilmatacat ofilbe.
'r El E. 4
MAIN STREET,
(NEXT DOOR TO FELCH Zr. CO.,
WHITE and DECORATED CHINA.
Latest designs and pat terns of
STOP AT
toOR
.F„
AND
PROVISIONS.
TowaiDA: PA..
ZIR can s% m.
CUBESD~aliepsia Lives
!ism, Drcipgy, Heart ;lease,
lowness - Nervous debility, etc.
rho 8324 EDT =TOW. taloa!
1.1,000;000 Beatles
SOLD MICE 1870.
This Syrup possesses Varied . Properties
It Stimulates the Ptyalin* In .the
Saliva, which converts the • Starch and
Sugar of the limed into glucose. A dell.
cien:gi e s PtyaUne causes Wind and
Sou of the food in the stomach. It
the m edicine 'stallion immediately alter
eating the fermentation of Auld is pro.
. -
It vented
acts upon the Veer. -
It acts upon thelCidnegs.
. eypdat Rowed& •
It R
Purifies the es the
Blood.
It Quiets the Nervous System. ,
It fteissota Digestion.
INmeriedies,
t "ell = a nen
carrion off the e i Ta t ireed end te4
It oeppeenas the pores of, the skin and (shwa
II g Prrepiration.'
It neutralizes the hereditary tain orpoisez
in the blood, which generates -Err
to
and all mauler of skin diseases and
internal humors.
'There are no spirits emplbyed to its manw
facture. and ft can be taken by the most dell
cite babe. or by the agedend feeble, care onIS
being micleits attention to directions.
DRUGGISTS SELL IT.,
Laboratory, 77 West Bdri3t g
NEW .TORKI CITY.
Never falls 10-Care.
Ashland. Bchnykill co., 1%.
Dear Bir:—Thin is to certify that your INDIAN
BLOOD SYRUP has benefited me more, after •
short trial, than all the medicine I have used
for DS years
Disease of the Stomach.
Ashland. Schuykill co.. Pa.
Dear have used your excellent INDIAN
BLOOD SYRUP for Disease of the Stomach, and
it has proved to be a valuable medicine.
NAL J. Armin.
NerTous Debility
Turtle Point, Mckesu co., Pa.
Dear 81r:—I was troubled' with Nervous Do.
bility and 'partial Paraiysis,i for • number of
years, and obtained no relief milli I used your
INDIAN BLOOD ; SYRUP, a short trial of which
.restored me to health. • ,
For Scrofula.
Turtle Point, McKean co., Pa.
Dear little girl was cured of Indent.
oration of the Face aced Eyes by the use of your
reliable INDIAN BLOOD SYRUP. A physician
had previously failed to afford relief and it was
thought that the child could not live. • Its neck
and breast was entirely covered with Scrofulous
Sores, which are tiow entirely gone.
Sere Care for Liver Coniplaint
Turtle Point, McKean co., Ps.
Dear Bir:—This is to certify that your INDIAN
BLOOD SYRUP has• effectually relieved mo of
Liver Complaint and Dyspepsia,. after the doc
tors failed. -.-
Remedy for the Rheumatism:
. " Turtle Point, McKean co. Ps.
Dea . r Sir:—l have used your excellent DTDIAN
BLOOD SYRUP fOr Rheumatism and Liver Com
plaint, and have derived great relief therefrom.
s - . Damns Sntrson.
An Agent's TeStimony.
Turtle Point, McKean co., Pa.
Dear Sir:—l was a life-long sufferer from Liver
Complaint until I used your great INDIAN
BLOOD SYRUP. from which I soon obtained
permanent relief. I also find the Syrup to be a
valuable Bowel Regulator.
HZIFIT O. SIMPSON.
•
A '.Valuable Medicine. • .
- Berlin Somerset Co., Pa.
Dear Sir:—This is to certify that your reliable
INDIAN BLOOD SYRUP is the beat medieine
ever used in my family. • Hoping the publiewill
be benefited by this great remedy. I Ulm area
pleasure it giving my testimony of its value.
JOSEPH
Dyspepsia and Indigestion.
Berlin. Somerset Co.. Pa.
Dear Sir:—l take pleasure in recommending
your INDIAN BLOOD SYRUP as the best medi•
cine made...P,eople who are Dyspeptic, should
not fail to give it a trial. For tae Stomach it
his no eqUal. I have used it and know it to be
a valuable medicine. •
Liver Complaint.:
•
Berlin. Somerset Co.. Pa.
Deal Sir was troubled with Liver Com•
plaint for a long time, and by the persuasion of
your Agent; I commenced taking your excellent
INDIAN BLOOD SYBDP,which has greatly bane.
flied me. 1 have never found any medicine to
coma it. and can confidently say it is a safe and
highly valuable remedy. i •
1 Enwastro
Pain in the Breast.
Berlin, Somerset Co., Pa.
Dear Sir:—l was &Meted with a Pain in my
Breast and Side. and when I would lie down, I
could scarcely breathe for. Pain, I was also very
weak in my Breast and Lungs. I used some of
your INDIAN BLOOD SYRUP and am now near
ly well. My Lungs are strong ow.* more and I
am very' grateful to ycin for inch a valuatde
remedy...
Dyspepsia and Indigestion.
Philadelphia, Pa.
Dear 81r:—Thli is to certify that your valua
ble INDIAN BLOOD SYRUP has cured me of
Dyspepsia and Indigestion, which I had been
afflicted with for years. '
For kidney Diseases.
Philadelphia, Pa.
Rear Sir :—I tiffs subject to severe Pains in my
Kidneys, Weakness and Painful Kick Headache,
loryears, and failed to obtain relief, until I was
induced to try your reliable INDIAN BLOOD
SYRUP. a short trial of ;which restored me to
perfect health. -
;Ames Bur.
No 1525 Butts= Bt.
For Costiveness.
Philadelphia, Pa.
Dear Sir:—l was troubLed with Costivenes and
Headache. and the use of your INDIAN BLOOD
SMUT, proved Moat beneficial to me. It Is the
hest medicine Fever used. •
,I L as. A. Blown.
f 10.1317 Federal St.
For BMlOnstieso.
Philadelphia. Pa.
• Dear Sir: —I was &filleted with - Dyspepsia snd
Billiousness for years, and Ailed to procure re.
Uef until I began using your INDIAN • BLOOD
anon.. which soon effectually relieved me. I
take great pleasure in recommending its use to
the afflicted.
Fail' T. Uommunr,
No. 1035 Locust Bt.'
Disease of the Stomach and. Liver.
lined:milt, Pike Co., Pa.
Dear kr:This is to certify that I bay. used
your INDIAN BLOOD STROP for Disease of the
Stomach and Liver, and ban been much bene
fited thereby.
liest Fuilli nhk iedlei nt se.
.-. Pike Oo.: Pa.
Dear Sir ;—I consider your , reliable INDIAN
BLOOD SYRUP the beat medicine I eve need in
my huskily. It is just as recommended.
MALarn Corium
ttemedy for Worms.;;'
Dear Mr:—l hare MA your great INDIAN
BLOOD STROP in soy „gamily for Worm and
Stumm? Complaint, end it las proved effectual
in all eases.
Never Falls to Care.
Dear fOr:—lty daughter vac la Poor Railth
and s Sheet Mal of your INDIAN BLOOD BYBIIP
entirety cored low.
AGENT= . .of km Bala
rur of thONDIAN BLOOD
BIM la_taws-or Tiny's, Wilde% ban
so pa. ftlegs oupplhattaa.
• --
TOWANDA, BRADFORD COUNTY, PA., THITRSDAYs- *ARCH 2, LBB2.
:THE THE. T,OF THE STAYS.
krosen good story.'
It was little Ituddlesten, the ensign;
*he spoke. • There was about ball a
dozen of not sitting, together . on the deck
of thetroop ship Leviticus. • We were
returning honiefrom tIK Cape, and us
ed to collect here in the cool of the
evening,' with pipes and glasses mid
amuse each other by telling stories.
giant many . Moriea were, told during
that pleasant voyage hotne, we being
idle and will:watt:toes, and the circum
stances and Conditions of our blight
symposium Stimulating to the nveri
_five faculties. It followed, as 'an inci
dent, if not, necessary , result,' that
many of the stories, were legendary, the
element of truth being, I regret to say,
less highly prized than that of' Inge
unity in the matte of a racy plot and a
satisfactory f Anti]. The story • which
follows has no plot to speak of; and it
is for the reader to say whether the final
is satisfactory Or the reverse, but good
or bad, it forms au - exception to '-the
majority - of those which were related on
the deck,of theLevitiens, in that it has
a foundation in fact.
Sal knows - a' good story,' said little
Buddlestone, commonly. called Buddy,
as he squatted oil the deck, with his
comical stumpy figure and comical big
head, puffing tremendously at a short
clay pipe. : •
'What's it.uliont?' said
.the captain,
who fingered his cigarette in a delicate
manner.
'lre about stays, isn't Lit, Hal?' said
Buddy.
diou't Buddy; now don't,'. pleaded
Harold, Lieutenant Harold, who was
handsome and shy, and never liked to
bdealled on l'Or a story. 'Not that
story;' I'll. tell you: another quite as
good.'
It; B. Bn.z.w►i
'Stays, or,notbing, old man,' persist
ed. Buddy; tind'a peremptory ehorus'J of
'Stays or nothing, old man!' rose on, the
still night air.
'Bat it would, distress me to tell that
story,' again peged Harold. 'I wouldn't
have it repefited for the' world; the lady
is ''my sister's great friend. She is
married now; Bho mightn't like it.'
, D. C. Wo:filar
'MI good men and true, here,' put in
the captain. !Change the names, and
there'a no harM done.'
We will' he mute, ,we swear!' Said
Buddy, and the chorus went np: 'We
will be :mute, we swear!'
'Well, th i n; began the lieutenant,
sadly but resignedly, 'to commence
With, the widow was the sweetest widow
that ever lived.' •
An inartictilitte hum of content rose .
from the group . of listeners, and Buddy
filled his pipe, -. closed
. his eyes with an
air of pleased 9pectancy, and murmur
ed, in a soft, piarenthetic manner, as- he
,stretched his inconsiderable length up
'on the deck: widows are jam.'
'I knew her intimately,' pursued
Harold.
of WAILan: /barn
F. F. BISHOP.
Buddy took the _ebbnized clay from
between his li'ps, winked at it solemnly;
and replaced it.
'I visited her frequently at her house;
she gave the pleasantest little partieti in
the world—bachelors' parties mostly,
but sometimes they were of "both sexes
and very oftefi,' continued Harold hur
riedly, for thettaPtain was' shaking his
forefinger at thh" whisky bottle, 'and
very often men took their wiveS with
them. There were :little meetings for,
supper lifter, the theatre, when we-amok=
ed cigarettes, and played quiet rubbers,
and sang quiet songs, and told quiet
stories, and were all very pleasant, • and
—and—and _ .
Harr= Kawamra.
'And quiet,! said Buddy, in a sooth
ing tone to his ettddy, "they were
pleasant and quiet.'
'She lived in the west end of town—
it might have, been in Bayswater; it
might have , been in Lensington, it
might have been in Belgravia. That
'doesn't ,matter to you fellows—in is
small exquisitively furnished, ,house,
with nice books and dainty pictures;
and she was the sweetest widOw that
ever livel.'
'Give a name to' this widow,' said
Buddy, 'that we may breathe it tenderly
'when night falls gently on the silver
D. M. U. u..
12ffl
I will give to the lady,' said Harold,
'the name of Cronin. One day,' he
went on, "I called at her house to
arrange somqetails connected with a
Subscription she was getting up in aid
of a poor chorus singed at, the opera.
litre, Cronin was not at hothe, but the
maid said, she would return shortly, if
I liked to step in and wait. The maid
knew me well, Of course.'
'She knew him said Buddy,
sotto race. ; •
.Gsozas Itimar
went in - and way shown up into
the little - drawing-room on the first
floor. How well I remember that
room! What ' s snuggery it Was! Flowers
everywhere, and the light falling
pleasantly through the Indian curtains;
ana an alcove, behind which yott
heard the cool drip of a minature foun
tain; and the newest magazine 'and the
last book of poems on the little table
by thellreplace. I waited, but she did
outcome. rang. the bell, and - the .
servant (what neat sgrvanta she idways
had) aseured i me that her mistress must
return in a moment. I waited, but sbe
came not,. and I must go. I looked
about for pette and paper to write a
line. crossing the room to the escritoire
that stood besides the sofa. Something
peeping out from the pillow of the sofa
caught my eye.'_l looked at it curiously
and retreated a 'step. I looked at it
eagerly and , went two _Mega; Could it
be? No, it (Nina not; and yet it must
bel It ahould b., end it:shotdd not be;
It is no! It ie! rcattelt at the i silken
string that hung over the edge of sofa;
I gave it I twitch, and held - dangliug in
my band a pair of stayer - '
'Go slow, Hal; go slow, if yois love
me!' said Buddy, in anexcited tone.
Tammuz 17Amarzszer
Tama' Common%
Bushkin. Pike Co.. Pa.
Vi amr .
"GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLE BY THE PEOpLE 'AND POE TEE PEOPLE,"
tell you; said pieritenint. his
feelings also thing.
,tell you. that I
held in my hand a pair of stays. How
shall I describe them, for I bad emit no
Such thing before?
Buddy put his hand to his month
ME
and eenibtd; and EWA: the - other elk
84tnaniped end sendkiired his intake.
cannot adequately describe theni,
yet I see them now. --Have you fellows
ever—seen any slays/ '; : You never saw
stays like, those; ! thea43 ,is not such
another, pair .in the world:
_Divine
thipgs, I se . Wyoui Ova Satin stays of
heaven's own hue, - *lobed heie and
there with knots of d darkeri,shade. I
am not naturally eloquent but I said
some eloquent thifigs while I held those
stays. , fingers -
.trembled as I held
the curved
. sides, which had been
anonlded to a form:;that Hebe would
have envied. I took them- gently, I
caressed them, I believe touched
them with may; lips.. Cientlemen.,l was
nineteen, and=she was my first love; it
was a moment of soretamptation.'
.4, of sore temptation!' said Buddy
sympathetiely.- -
'I don't know how - fong I stood theie
with these dear things in my , hand,
but the striking of the clock reminded
me that I
_was too late tit keep an ap
pointment that I. had elsewhere:
Scarcely knowing what I did I secreted
nak prize under my coat, and leaving
ta,message, and dreading to meet. the
*Aid on the stairain the Pessege, I ran
down quickly, caught up hat and stick,
let myself out ut the door and bolts2d
-for my chambers. I bad the little sky
blue treasure tinder my cost, and I
presged it closely tome as I ran rather
than walked throngli the street to my
rooms in the neighborhood of Picea•; l
dilly.. Arrived there, I locked the door
and took ont the stays. As I looked at
them I felt more like a poet than I bad
overdone since. They wotalkhave in
'spired &hermit or a ‘ director of a rail
way company; and they inspired me,
though not to verse. A mad suggestion
came to me.' to measure that precious
girdle. I know that though the widowt i a
form was of an enchanting fulness,,
waist was as slender as a girl's; bat
something tempted me to know its
size in inches. I laid a tape measure
across the, satin, placing my finger at
the centre to hold it. Hal what is thiti?
A tiny oil skin bag fastened on' the , in
ner side, just at the spot where Hetes
tender heart,. should throb, and some
thing inclosed in Another mad ling
, gestion, a panknife; a hasty slit in the
oil skin;. and out dropped ti. _Bank' of
England, note for £2o.'
The bells sounded for a change in the
watch. It was summer's night of de
liltclans "coolness. The still waters of
She sea shone with a soft and soothing
itidiiii - C — e;and behind na was a phos
phorescent glow. Although we were
sailing many knots.au hour, we Anew
not the motion of the vessel; wo might
belying at anchor in some still bas.
;kiddy replenished his own and :Abe
other glassea,,and suggested that -the
break Which the lieutenant had invol
untary made in his story offered a favor
able opportunity for a moment's medi
tation 04 the 'extravagance of yonth.
After a pause the lieutenant proceed
ed with his story.
'For a few momenta' said Harold.
'my mind seemed to cease working.'
I.
did not know in the least , where I was'
or what'l bad done; I had no power of
thought. Then I roused myself, and
the first distinct notion that crossed my
mind was that 1 I was an idiot. My
rashness bad placed me in a fix
,' from
which for 4 moment I did not under
: stand how L should escape. It was
clear that I had stolen. Mrs. Cronin's
stays, and equally clear that in stealing
the stays i had stolen also a bank Mote
of £2O. Then the comical elemei4, in
the situation "!iserted and I
wanted to laugh.' But I checked my
self, for I csemed on a sudden ' toi see
the merry, mocking face of the widow,
and my own merriment was converted
into shame, - aa I heard in fancy. • the
ringing laugh of Mrs. Cronin. I should
have to carry those _stays right back
again. and confess my sentimental folly
to the lady„ and she would laugh at me
for the rest of my dais.'
Even then. as he told the story, the
Lieutenant was overcome by the mem
ory of iris humiliation; and Buddy, ob
serving his downcast and sorrowful
looks, pushed the bottle toward hini r in
mute sympathy. •
'lt needed time' to summon courage,'
he went on again, 'and I could not go
at once. I placed . the stays, which
seemed now to be mocking me, as I felt
sure their mistress would, tenderly
away in the cupboird, and locked the
door, threwlhe note into my desk, and,
went ont and took my horse for a gal
lop in the park.
'ln an hour I returned, a trifle easier
in my mind, having determined to send
lack the stays and bank note, with
some verses for Mrs. Cronin on the
danger of leaving her corsets on the
drawing-room sofa. But I was not to
escape thus. The play was not yet
played out. On the table of my room
I found a note to this -effect from -my
fellows know him—the
Honorable Tom:
'Hal; old man, I have promised
Mrs. Cronin £2O for her subieription
I a
list. Must give it to her this afternoon.
Have nothing to bless mvaelf with but
the bad half-sov, with a hole in it,
that Potty Dingle gave, me. Came to
borrow of you; found the very thing in
your desk; pay you to-morrow or next
day. ' ' Tom.'
'Panic ? I never knew what panic
meant before. Doha yOu see what has
happened ? My confounded brother,
dear old Tom, was going to give to Mrs.
Cronin the very infernal note of Which
I had robbed her. __Probably bx this
time the theft was discovered; the people
at the bank communicated with; some
innocent creature—perhaps little Mari,
her honeemaid, the honestest girl alive
—might be suspected, even accused, for
Mrs. Cronin would never imagine the
idiotic truth of the matter; and there '
was that Tom making off to ter with
the very note as cool as you please; and
she would, of course, recognize it at
One. Bat he must- be stopped. - Per
haps he had not yet started. No cal horse .
ever went like the beast that carried me
to Tonal' chambers that day, The cab
man said he was an old hunter, and I
should suppose be wondeted_what new
sort of a hunt, he was in then, for the
Man screeched at him from Lie perch
and I bellowed from sittkin, and we did
not wait to ask after any of the peoplv
we knocked ovey on the road. Bu tq
•wax too late. Yon may be very.eare of
bat:: The hand ; otiate was in it. I wee
not going to be let off cheaply in that
way. I had got,' to go sight through with
this business. and smart for my idiocy.
Tom had gon; out just ten minutes ago.
and be bad gone to Mrs. Cronin's. Ot
course bead; where else should be go `.l
There was but une place - in all the world
to which he could- have gone with the
£26 note—to Mra. Cronin'e. And that
was the place that t .l- must go. • Why did
nott go at once ? Because I was a kind
of tniserable coward. and stood there
wondering whether I had not better go
and sink my stupid body in the Serpen-
-tine.:'t I had been bold, and started
°lrv. onee,`l "might even' then, on ths
supposition that Torn would walk, have
been Pat at Mrs. Cronit . I% and stopped
him at the door. I looked at the horse
that had brought me tc• Tom's and saw
that O 3 would do -no more galloping that
day. Then a horrid basemess 'dame Aver
me and I thought I would leave Toni to
explain as best he might to Mrs. Crimp
and I would sneak in when the breeze
had settled. tI took , the longest possible
'way to her .house; I went down blind
alleys and pretended that I- was f3tll•
prised when I came to a blank wall, and
had to go back again.- I stayed to watch
every stupid performance on the streets'
and emptied my pocket of small cash on
all the lame, blind, and deaf impostors
whom I could prevail on to tell ma the
entire ,history of their misfortunes. The
day was waning when I got to the
square in which Mrs. Cronin resided.
'Yon may think •that. once arrived,
I should have moral dottrage enough to
carry me straight to the widow's pres
ence, and face the matter out with a
good heart. Yon are wrong; I had not
- any kind of courage, moral or physical,
about me. I stood for five minutes on
the door step before I pulled the bell,
and . repulled it - with a miserable unlit:
.cision that gave me a "m ' oment's hope
there would be tip effect on the who,
when I would hav4 - lied to myself that
the house was empty, and crawled home
again. But there was a step in the pas
sage and the door was opened. Was
Mrs.' Cronin at home ? Yes, she was.
But she . was engaged, no doubt? It was
an inconvenient hour; would call again;
I bad in - reality nothing of importance
to say; I would leave a card. Did I
think I was going so escape that way.?
Mot. Cronin was sot . engaged—that was
to say, there was no one with her but
my _brother; and the cook; between
whom and myself - this interview -was
taking place, believed that-Mrs. Cronin
was particularly an xious
, to see - me.
Would I be so good as to step up stairs
to the drawing-room ? Up thosiistairs,
down which my madness had carried me
head-long not six heirs before, I now
walked with the cheerfulness of one who
expects to meet the headsman on -the
landing. 'No sound issued from the .
- drawing-room: but I knew that there
were persons there. There were no
voices within as the cook opened the
door and introduced me. An oppressive
calm seeme'd to have settled on the as
sembly,; 1 I had sußpected a noise, but
this was worsc-. Mrs. Cronin stood be
tide the fire -place and looked confused.
Tom faced her and looked puzzled.
Mary i the housemaik stood beside thein,
and looked stupid. I came in and look
ed corpse-like.' The bank notelcir .£2O
was in the hand of Mrs. Cronin.
'The very note—the note itself,' she
said., 'The identical note which Mary
came crying to say she bad lost four
years ago—lost, along ;with a pair of
stairs, into the lining of, which she had
stitched it.'
".'Mary I' I gasped inwardly, 'Mary
lost, that note t Mary 'stitched it into
the starli 1 What new horror is this ?
`'"Here is the note back again, which
is 'the main thine said Mrs. Cronin;
*but the odd part of the business is that
I get it from Tom, and odder still. Tom
tells 'me that he gets it from Hal, or at
least, from. Hal's chambers, where he•
went to-get such a sum from him: . Why,
we have just put the police on the track
of an innocent piano -tuner, who , waa
here ten minutes Wore Hal came thiS
morning. Bat surely we need have no
more, mystery . now. Here is Hal, ho
will explain.' •
"'Yes, Mrs. Cronin,' I said, 'I think
I can' explain;', and I looked at Mary,
for I Could not tell my wretched story
while, she stood 'there to help in. the
laughing.
"Mrs. Cronin, with true womanly tact,
turned to Iloly kind told her She might
run to the police station, and tell them
to take no' further steps in the nutter
for the present.
"'Now, Hal,' she said, when' Mary
had reluctantly closed the door behind
her, 'where are those stays ?'
"'Mrs. Cronin,' I said, 'the stays are
locked in a cupboard in my room.'
" *Good gracious, child, what are they
doing there r i -
"And then in weak and faltering tones
I began my confession.
"Began, I say; for I had scarcely hint
ed, how, on discovering the stays, I had,
in an instant loved themlor their mis
tress's sake, and borne them.away not
knowing what I did, before the blue
eyes of Mrs. Cronin commenced to
sparkle, and the corners of her sweet
mouth to quiver, and 'the whole of her
dainty form to tremble in an effort to
keep down the ktughter that was coming.
And then it came.. She laughed. It
Was not her face only that laughed; she
laughed all over.
"'Go away, both of you,' she said; 'I
shall break in pieces. Hal, you will kill
me I Make me stop laughing, or I shall
be dead is fire minutes.'
"And then.s4hen she had gained a
moment's tielf-control, she said:
"'But, Hal, Stem were not my stays
at all l'
"And then abe beganagain, and Tom,
after her. I never saw anybody laugh
until then.
'Not yours. Mrs. . Cronin r I gasped;
'not your stays?'
'Not mine a bit, Hat , They were
IdarY!... I gave them to her. I never
wore them one Ob. Tom, don't t can
not . 'yon atop ? Did you kiss them, Hal?
Forgive me, Hal, lam very sorry; but
I must laugh; it is too
_funny. What did
yon say was the color of those stays,
Hall, Poor Hal rhapsodizing over
Mary's stays 1'
"I thought Mrs: Cronin would haiv
done herself an injury. In fietween the
fits she went on again: •
"'Mary was stitching in' the thing
this morning in this room where she had
no btudness to be--the piano mart came
—she hid . them hurriedly under thesofa
and in here, where you found them—
Tom, there is my vinaigrette behind
you.' "
And. Hal said no more; and we all eat
silent end felt for him.
Hy-and:by Buddy said: -
la that widow still a widow?'
'No,' said Hal, sadly; she married the
Hnnorable Tom six months afterward}'
wi t h e ga d sighed; and we all aighel
'The day, is -breaking,' presently said
the captain, and we went below.
A Western Drover's Story.
My name is Anthony Hunt. - I am . a
drover, and live miles and miles away
upon the Western prairie. There won't
a house within, sight when I moved
there, my wife and I, and now we
haven't many neighbors, though thoge
ye have are good ones.
t'One day, about ten years ago, •Lwent
x
away from,home to sell so me fifty head
of cattle—fine creature as I: ever Ow.
I was to bay some groceries and dry
goods before' I came back, and, above
all, a doll for our youngest Dolly; she
never had a doll of her Own—only the
rag babies her mother hitd made her.
Dolly-could talk of nothing else, and
went down to the very gate to call after
me to buy her a big one. Nobody :but
a parent can understand how fall 'ixiy
mind was of : that toy, and how, when
the cattle were sold, the first thing I
harried ell: to buy Doll's doll. I found
a large one, with- eyes that would open
and shut when you pull a wire, and had
it wrapped up is a paper, and . tucked
it under my arm, while I had the pa
r
eels of calico and delaiue and a and
sugar put - up. Thep, late us it was, I
started for home. 'lt 'might ha, e been
more prudent 'to stay until morning,
but I felt aiiaions to get back, and
eager to hetir Dolly's praises about - her
doll. ..
I was mounted on a steady-going old
horse of mine, and pretty well loaded.
Night set ire - before I was a mile from
town, and settled down as dark as pitch
while I, was in the middle of the wildest
bit of road I knew of. I could' have
felt my way, though, I remembered it
so well; and when the storm that had
been breWing broke and; pelted the rain
in torrents I was five miles, or may be
six from home yet-too.
I rode as fast as I could, but all of a
sudden I-lieard a little cry like a child's
voice ! I stopped short and listened—
I heard it again. I called and it an
swered tue. I_Oouldn't see a thing; all
Yu dark as pitch. I got down and felt
around in the giass—called again, and
again was answered. Then I began to
yonder. I'm not timid, but I lwaa
known to be a drover and to have money
l aborit me. It might be a trap to -catch
3
me unawares and rob and murder e.
I am not euPerstitiouit—not • ery;
but how could a real child be out in the
'Prairies in such a might, at such au
,taiiir : ? It might be more than human:
The bit of acoward that hides itself in
most men showed itself to me then, but
once more I heard the cry, and said I:
'lt any mane child is hereabouts, An
thony Hunt is not the man to let it
die.'
I searched again: Atha I bethought
me of a hollow under the hill, and grop
ed that way. Bare enough I found a
little dripping thing. that moaned add
sobbed es I took it in my arms. I call
ed iny horse, and the beast came tome,
andi mounted and tucked and tucked
the Jittle soaking thing under my coat
as well as I could, promising' to take it
home to mammy. Ix seemed tired to
death, and pretty soon cried itself to
sleep against my bosom.
i It had slept there over an hour when
I saw my own windows. There were
lights in them, and I supposed my wife
had lit them for my sake; bat when I
got into the door yard I saw something
was the:matter, and stood still with a
dread fear of heart five minutes b efore
I could lift the latch. At last I `did it,
and saw the room full of neighbors,
and my' wife amid them !seeping.
When she saw me shetid her face.
'Oh, don't tell him,' she said.
will kill him.' .
'What is it,neighbors ?' I cried.
'Nothing now; I hope—what's tha
in your arms•?'„7
'A poor, loaCchild, said L 'I found
it on the road. And I lifted the sleep
ing thirg and saw the face of my own
child, my Dolly.
It was my darling, and tone other,
that I - had picked up on the drenched
road. f
" My little child had wandered out to
meet 'daddy' and the doll, while the
mother was at work, and whom they
were lamenting as one dead. I thanked
heaven on my knees before thim all. It
is not much of a story, neighbors, but I
think of it oftenin the tights, and won
der how
.I could bear to live i if I had not
stopped when 'I beard the cry for help
upon the road, the little baby, hardly
louder than a squirrel's chirp. • •
That's Dolly, yonder with her mother
in the meadow, a girl worth saving—l
think—(but' then I'm her father and
partial maybe) the prettiest and sweet
est thing - this side of the, Mississippi. ,
—Detroit Free Press.
Indianapolis has a girl 20 years old
who "claims the ability to handle and
- count 01000 in small bills in four min
utes. ,That's nothing. We've got girls
,Towanda, that Would pay out
,that sum
in small bills in two minutes, and make
their fathers feel awful downhearted.
f
MEE
TITS SHADOWED epos iv
a wedded love oil/ lives , had twined
One year—one earelesa, golden year—
And then he died, my darling-died;
And, for the joy that harbored there,.
My heart was filled with dark aespair.
I traced the haunts he loved the best
•In dear, lost daysilss, so brief!
Aid"memity's breathings, once so sweet,
But fanned the furnace of my grief;
They brought no tears to my relief,
At batty dawn I sought his grave,.
'Mid quaint:•earved stones, o'ergrown with
rms,
And lo ! upon the hallowed mound—
In seeming emblem of my -
There fell the shadow of a cross.
And kneeling, there in tearless woe,
Methought Zhou(' my darling say:
"Oh love thy grief a Shadow is,
Whlch,:as a dream, shall pass stray,
Where shadows melt in clondiess day l"
then 'found iny anguish vent in tears, •
Strands tears of heav'n-born peso*, that
shod
Around my soul a holy calm;
And when I rose, thus comforted.
The shadow from_the grave bad tied
—Good Words.
. ,
DR. BEAL AirCTL PORTRAIT OF' 1118
FATIIER. . I
•
If-I shall trier win the home in heaven,
Ear whose sweet rest I hum by hope and
Pray, ' -
In the great company of the forgiven
I ehall figure to Lind old Daniel Gray.
I know him well, in truth, few knew him
bettir;
For my young eyes oft read for him the word,
And saw how meekly from the crystal letter:
He drank the life of his beloved
.Lord. T7:l
Old Daniol Gray was not a man who lifted
On ready . , words his freight of gratitude;
Nor was he called among the gifted'
In the tarter meetings of his neighborhood.
He hadis few old-fashioned words and
phrases,
Linked iU with sacred text and Sunday
And I suppose that in his prayers and grave,
I've heard them at least a thousand times:
I see htm now—his form, his face, his mo.
bons. - •
His homespun hshit and his 'silver hair
And'hear the language of his trite devotions
Basing beyond the straight-backed kitchen
- chair. •
I can remember how the sentence sounded, •
"Help us, oh, Lord, to pray, and not to faint!"
And bow the "conquering , and' to conquett'
• - rounded -
The loftier aspirations of the allot.
He had some notions that did not improve
him; •
He never kissed his children—so they say;
And finesescenes of rarest flowers would move
him -
Less than a c horseshoe picked up in the way
He had tt, hearty hatred of oiipressiou,
And righteous word for iiin.ot every kind;
Ala that the transgressor and transgression
Were linked ao-closely in his honest mind !
Ho could see naught but vanity in beauty,
And naught bat weakness M a fond caress,
And pitied men whose views of Christian duty
Allowed indulgence in such foolishness.
Yet there were love and tenderness within
him;
Andq aT told that when his Charley died,
Not nature's need nor gentle word could win
hiin
Froin hiii fond vigils at the sleeper's side
And when they came to bury little (Marley,
They fouridfresh dewdrops sprinkled in his
' hair, ;
And on his breast a rosebud gather ‘ eif oarly,
And guessed, but did not know, who placed
thore. - •
Honest and faithfal, constant in his culling,
Strictly attendant on the means of grace,
Instant in prayer, and fearful most of falling,
Old Daniel Gray was always in his place.
A practical old man, and yet a dreamer; .
He thought that in some strange, ' unlooked
for way ,
His mighty friend in heaven, the great Re
deemer,
Would honor him with wealth some golden
day.
This dream ho carried in a hopeful spirit
Until in - :death his patient eyes grew dim,
And hi4ltedeemer called him to inherit
The heaven oUwealth long garneivid up for
him..
80, if ever I win the home is heaven,
For whose sweet rest I humbly hope and pray,
In the great company of the forgiven
I shall be sure to find old Daniel Gray.
FORTHE GENTLE SEX.
She may dress in sillt or may dress, in satin,.
May , know the language's Greek and Latin,
May know fine art, may love and sigh—
But she ain't no good if ahe can't make pie.
It isn't because a woman is .exactly
afraillotu cow that , she runs away and
screams.. It is because gored.
are not fashionable.
A Vermont couple have monied after
a courtship of twelve years, daring
which the bride's father has pat, seven
sets of hinges on the front, gate.
r;T
'Think I'd hie in that building ?' ex
claimed the lady who ran a boarding-
house 'Not a bit of it. ' Why, all the
doors fastened with bolts.' There isn't
a key-hole in the building.'
'lf I lave , ever used, 'any unkind
words Hannah,' said Mr.. Smiley, re
flectively,' 'I take them all back. ' 'Yes,
I suppose you want to use them over
again,' was the not very soothing reply:
Clara Louise Kellogg knows how to
make bash. This fact is of interest in'
view of her approaching marriage. It
is especially interesting to the man'arlio
will have to eat the hash.
Tbeifair wearers of the fashionable
flaming red kid glove must continually
feel with Lady Macbeth 'that their
bands, like hers, would 'the multitudin
ous seas incarnadine, making the green
—one red.'
At a young ladies' seminary recently,
during an examination in history,, one
of the pupils was interrogated thus:
'Mary, did'Martin Luther die a natural
death ?' 'No,' Was the reply; 'he was
excommunicated by a bull.'
George Smalley telegraphs from Loif.'
don that Mrs. Langtry's 'ankles are
slender.' Let us thank heaven that we
have the Atlantic cable so we can have
this fact telegraphed to us and not have
,to wait for it to come by mail.
A Providenea woman went . no fur
ther towards murdering an enemy than
to get a false advertisement of her death
into the papers.with the age set down
as thirty-eight yesttv, and the 'Miss"
inserted . to remind the lady that she
was still unmarried.
II
OEM
i DANIEL GRAY.
ga.bu a Year, in AdTSUIOI-•
,SBLECtED HUMOR.
Penurious yOung men 'who go off
sleigh•ri4ing alone shonlci remember
that there is a jaw against sleighing ,
"without belles.
Men never like to be told they are
turning to a brute. Thari the reason
they don't like to look in a looking
glass,' for fear they will see their heads
getting to be a little bare.
'Can't you trust me, darling ?' mnr
mured Spilkins to the daughter of old
Moneylender. 'Not without real estate•
security,' relied Isabella, absent
mindedly.
The two friends were talking about
theatres. 'How wide is the stage open
ing at Music Hall r asked one. 'Well, -
I don't know exactly,' said, the. other,
'but it l is just the width of a Gainabor
°ugh hat on the seat in front.'
A. Syracuse man made a bet of ''ss6-
that ho could find six women in that
city who 'would marry him, and ho won
it. Now he's ready to give the 859 to.
anybody who will show him a way to
get out of six engagements. - '
Papa, is it nice to make remarks
about people'adress?"Why, certain
ly 'not, darling' what did you ask that
for ?' 'Nothing, papa, oully mamma
said my dress was awfully shabby, and
wondered why papa bairn noticed it
long ego.' ;
• -
Some years ago an
_Austin mem:haat
Whom we will call Smith, beCarise that
was, and is, the naMe painted on his
:ign-board, sent auOrder for goods at a
New york firm. - Smith belonged to
the old school. He kept a very exten;
sive general store, had plenty pf Money.
kept all his accounts in pocket
meinorandum-book, and didn't know
the difference, between double entry
bookkeeping and the science of correla
tive hydrostatics. Among other things.
be nrdered were twelve gross assorted
clothes-pins, twelve ditto grindstones. -
When he ordered the grindstones he.
meant to order an assortment of twelve _
grindstones. The shipping clerk of
the New York firm was astonished
when he read the order. - He went to
the manager and -said: 'For hekveh's:
sake l• what do they want with twelve
gross—l72B—grindstones in Texas r
The manager Said it must be a mis-_ •
take, and telegraphed 'Smith,
it a mistake ordering so many grind
stones ?' Old mau Smith • prided him
self on never making a mistake. He •
had no copy of his order to refer - to,
and if he had he would not have re
ferred to it, becanse he. knew he had
only ordered twelve grindstones. - So
he wrote back: Probably you thitik
yon-know my business better than I
do. I always order what I want, and I
want what I order: Send' on the grind
stoties.'_ The. New York firm knew ,
Smith was a little eccentric, but that he
always paid cash on receipt of invoice,
and was able to buy a dozen quarries
full of grindstones if he cared to indulge
in such luxuries, so they filled his
order as written, and chartered ' a
schooner, filled-her full of grindstones,
and cleared her for Galveston.. They
wrote to Smith and said that they hop
ed the Consignment of 'grindstones by
schooner would keep them going until
- they could charter another vessel.
Smith sold grindstones at wholesale,
and at_ low figures on long time, • for
some three years afterward.—Texan
_ -
Sif•lin - 'qs. -
'One evening, above Lewisburg,
: on
the liiraissippi,‘ began Capt. ,Paul
Boynton, was on the lookout for =
some place where I could stop, Or for
some person Irina whom I could obtain
information, when, near the bank of
the river, I discovered smoke issuing
from the chimney of a small cabin. I -
hauled , to and blew my bugle.- For
some time the smoke issuingfrom the
chimney was the only sign of life.
Finally a man, an easy kind of individ- r '
ual, came walking down leisurely, re
garding "me curiously.
'powlar is it to Lewisberg V I asked.
'lts a party good distance.'
'But how far do yon call it V.
'I doan't call it.'
•Confoundl, it, man; is it
. two, three or
four thousand miles ?‘
'I reckon its one of the numbers.'
'Then I realized that I had met a kin&
man of the Arkansaw Traieler.
irritation, which had at first been ex
hibited, subsided, and desiring to get as
much information as possible,. I naked,
pointing to a bar:
'Which side of the channel [shall I
take ?' ' - .
'Either side you please.' _ •
'Which do you consider the better ?'
'I am not attendin' to other people's
b,uainess.'
'Which side do the steamboats take?'-
'lt is owin' to what capfain is aboard.'
'Well, bringing. the thing dOwn to &-
point, how long will it take me to get to
Lewisburg ?'
'lt is owin' ter how fast yon travel'
'My friend, I think yon,;,are the
foolinlonises."
.4n., stranger, I < think you are the
dovil come up to cool off. Go home.'
Captain Boynton will stark for Pine
Bluff Friday morning. -
I know that the world—that the great, big
world—
From the peasant up to the king,
Hsi a different tale from the tale I tell..
And a different way to Ring.
Bat for me--and I wit not a single flg
If they say lam wrong or right— -
I shall *Away go for the weaker dog,
Feel the under dog in the fight.
I know that the world—that the great, big
world
Will never a moment stop
To see which dog may be in the fault, • -
• But will shout for the dog on top,
1
But for me—l ;
never shall panes to ask
Which dog may be in the right—
•
For my heart will but, while it bests at all,
For the under dog in the fight.
Perchance what I've said I had better not
said,
Or %were better! bad said In incog., -
Batirith heiit and with esti' filled chock to
the brina— '
Here lain& to the bottom dog!
—Dam Remit.
NO. 40