Newspaper Page Text
B. F. SCHWEIER,
THE COnSTITUTIOn THE UNION AND THE ENFORCEUENT OF THE LAWS.
Editor and ProprUttr.
MIFFL.INTOWN, JUNIATA COUNTY, PENN., WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 5, 1900
r - S
BY B. 7VZ.
j .Military . FfomaDce.of. gou tfe. J Mca
Bat Miles still held the bridle, and de
dined to accept this broad hint, walking
beside bis cousin, till Jacky suddenly
came to a violent halt at the back gate of
a large farm yard, surrounded by high,
red-tiled, deep-roofed barns, and a noise
of lowing and barking and clucking and
"Oh, Miss Esme, dear!" cried a ruddy
cheeked, elderly woman, in a large check
ed apron, who was in the act of feeding
a mob of ducks. "She's been asking for
you the whole afternoon. Go in and see
her like a dear young lady. You're
brought the wool?"
"Yes, but I've no time to stop, Mary.
Jacky has kept me hours on the road. lie
went half-way into the horrid green pool
near the Belle rising, and was going to
lie down, only a boy rushed in and drag
ged him out; and be got loose in the hay
field, and I thought he never would have
been caught. I'll give you the fingering,
and I'll come in again," evidently anxious
to be gone.
"Oh, but here ia Tom to hold the pony,
and you must just run in for a minute,
dear. She's been awful irritable all day,
and maybe you'd put her in a good humor
for us; you know how she takes to you.
Do now," coaxingly. "Tom, go to the
pony's head!" to a youth with a shock
of red hair.
Thus adjured, Esme jumped off Jacky,
and hastily went into the farm house, fol
lowed by Miles, who found himself in a
long, low, tiled kitchen, with small 1st-tlced-paned
windows and well-stored raft
ers, and in the presence of a little old
woman, who wjis sitting near the fire in
a kind of beehive chair, with glittering
dak eyes, lighting up a face as wrinkled
as a roasted apple and as sharp as a
"Well, so you were not for coming in,
missy!" she cried, in a high, reedy voice.
"I saw you. My sight is spared to me,
though it would be as well sometimes if
It wasn't, to see the waste going on all
around," glaring at her daughter-in-law
and lifting, as she spoke, a large ear
trumpet to the ear nearest Esme.
"I would have come in, only I'm late.
granny," returned that young lady down ',
the trumpet, in her most apologetic tone
of voice, "and here is the wool," placing
a packet in the old lady's lap.
"It's gray!" she exclaimed. "I don't
wanjt gray wool. I said brown," she re
turned, ungratefully, as she held it up
and felt it critically between her claw
like fiugers, her eyes all the time fixed on
"I can change it," said Esme, making
"No, no, no; then I would not get It for
another long spell. It will have to do,"
very crossly. And now, suddenly sitting
op quite erect, and still staring hard at .
Miles, she nodded her head conlidentially. J
And so this is the young man that has
come all the way from the other end of
the world, hasn't he " Essie made a
quick sign of assent, unprepared for the
sequel, "to marry you."
"No, he hasn't!" she shouted down the
"It's no use you screaming to me,
missy," she returned shrilly. "I never
can bear what you say, and it just goes
through my poor head," now planting the
trumpet In her lap. and thus cutting off
any possible reply, "and it's no good
shaking your head like that. What's he
couie for else?" demanded this very ter
rible old person. "She's a good girl"
in a patronizing staccato "and you'll
get a pretty wife," she cried, raising a
high, chirruping voice, and addressing
herself specially to Miles, who, now that
he had seen Esme, was by no means so
averse to congratulations as he had been
two hours previously.
As for his uuhappy cousin, who knew
from years of experience the extraordi
nary loquacity of Granny Uogben, and
the liberties she allowed her tongue, she
got herself how she never exactly knew
once more out into the yard, and was
soon in the saddle. Jacky was stepping
homeward at a rapid, consequential walk,
wheu Miles overtook them running, say
ing, as be got np to them:
"Surely you are never going to be so
Inhuman as to desert me and leave me
to my fate in these outlandish lanes? It
would be ungrateful, to say the least of
"Oh," answering him very reluctantly,
"I will point you out the road, and you
can easily make your way home. You
go up this lane," pointing with her whip,
"aud lake the first turning on the right,
then the second on the left, then "
"Then," he interrupted emphatically,
"I shall have lost my way, and shall be
rambling about the fields all night. Pray
spare me this fate!"
Miles was amazed at his own persist
ence and his dwn flow of language, but
the rude avoidance of an exceedingly
pretty girl is occasionally a sufficient in
centive to put a young man on his met
tle. "Come, then. If yon like," was the
grudging answer; "but you must walk
fast, or we shall be late for dinner."
"I'll run the whole way. Ill be your
eyes, as if you were in India," he return
ed eagerly. "Only don't leave me!"
"To hear you, one would iraagineyou
were one of the babes in the wood," re
turned his cousin, contemptuously, glanc
ing down on her companion as she spoke.
"What an amiable person Mrs. Hog
ben's aged parent seems to be," he re
marked, irrelevantly. "I quite love her."
"Do you? You must be susceptible in
deed." Yes, he certainly had a look of
Teddy when he laughed.
I wanted to say something to you,'
continued Miles, nervously flourishing hi
cane about in a manner that excited the
Ire of Jacky; "and all the way up from
the fields I was cudgeling my brains, but
I could not say it I wanted to speak to
von about about this will, and yonder
worthy old woman broke the ice for me
at one plunge. You know-- "
"I know." interrupted his companion
hastily, with averted face, "that if ever
break it aay further. I .hall never
peak to you again. Also, that I shall
tea" yon here to find your own way
home as best yon can."
"May I not say one word on the sub-
Not one. Tle.se pot the whole affair
out of your mind. If yon even hint a
Ier:h;".h.a threHe had Zo recourse
Erin J forth l ."Meet on some f nture oc
"And what may I talk about?" he ask
ed. "What topic are not labeled dan
"Oh," pricking Jacky with her whip,
"talk of the weather, the crops, the new
moon, anything; talk of Burmah.
And thus eucouraged be lamely began
to make some conversation. But even
under their peculiar circumstances young
people of their age were sure to find
suujecLi ui cuuversuuuu, auu iif, v nr
ing he had an eager and intelligent listen
er, launched forth about the wonders of
Mandaley, that impostor the white ele
phant, the hill reported to be composed
of solid silver. Then he gave a few Bur
mese legends, a short sketch of Bangkok,
said to be the richest city in the world.
with its huge golden altar, streets full of
(amblers, and river cheery with the cele
brated singing fish, when, to his and
Esme a astonishment, they found tnem
selves already at the back gate at Bar
onsfor lo not suppose that she bad been silent
all the time. She had, after her Interest
was aroused, and feeling a conviction
that she had overawed and silenced the
young man beside ber. thawed and
thrown A remarks, questions aud nods
Just as plentifully as opportunity occur
red. He had a look of Teddy. Only for
thia one great point in his favor she
would never so she assured herself
have opened her lips to him, even once.
And yet in what did the likeness lie? He
was dark and sunburned, and not much
above middle height; while Ted was tall
"Why. we are actually at home!" he
exclaimed in surprise. "We must have
come by a short cut. How quick we have
"Yes," returned Esme, "those stories
of yours made the time pass. I don't
mean to flatter you," she added quickly,
but those descriptions of Burmah were
Co interesting, and I do like to hear about
ptber countries having seen so little my-,
elf no matter from whom; and of
l-ourse no one, however stupid, goes about
the world for nothing.
In this cruel manner did she qualify
her compliment; but Miles accepted it.
roncurnae in the time-nouorea aauge mai
half a loaf is better than no bread.
"We have ouly ten minutes before din
ner," said Esme, glancing nervously at
(he yard clock. "No, no," waving her
Cousin away impatiently. "I always dis
mount alone; but." jumping down, gath
ering up ber skirt and commencing to
run, "if yon like to follow me in by the
back door you may," she called to him
tondescendingly over her shoulder. "It
saves time." . y-
, CHAPTER VIII.
Under a shady bank, overhung by two
put trees, a clump of lilac, and a very
pneient mulberry, the summer house at
jBaronsford seeks to screen itself from
the vulgar gaze. Its kind old friend, the
but tree, spreads its leafy arms above
its pointed thatched roof, and conceals
its wigwam proportions from strangers'
yyes. Who is the girl in white huddled
up on the wooden seat that runs all
round the interior, a gir! with her dress
tightly gathered round her, and the tips
of her shoes merely resting on the
ground, her whole attitude bespeaking
distrust of the insect inhabitants, and
with her eyes bent on a young man in
uniform, who is sitting on the venerable
and rickety table, with his forage cap
over one ear, and his arms akimbo? They
are Esme and Teddy, of course. He is
brown, broad-shouldered and soldierly
looking, and itf-his sister's eyes as well
favored a young man as ever wore spurs.
She is far prouder of his personal appear
ance than she is of her own; his mus
tache she consider, simply perfect, and
her vanity i. divided between that and
the three-cornered white patch on his
forehead usually covered by his jaunty
forage cap. It is duskish in the summer
house; not a single moonbeam penetrates
from outside, thank, to the careful nut
"You will never guess where I supped
and slept last night, Esme," Teddy was
saying. "At Aunt Jane's!
"I don't believe you," returned his sis
ter, politely, after a minute'a pause.
"Nevertheless it is a fact all the same.
went down in fear and trembling to
wait npon the old lady. When she saw
me she stared very bard for about half
a minute, and then cried, 'Goodness, mer
cy, gracious! why, it's TeddyT She had
.not expected to see me in uniform, you
know; in fact, she had not expected to
see me at all. Well, then she put up her
arms and drew me down and kissed me
first time, I'll bet, she ever kissed a mus
tache and then she turned me round and
round as if I was on a pivot, and then
looked me all over; and then she kissed
me again and made me sit down beside
her and tell her all about myself and my
career, as she called it. And I did; 1
showed her my three stripes, and told her
of my prcspects, and hvw you had stuck
to me through thick and thin, and then
oh, incredulous young woman she killed
the fatted calf and told me I was not to
dare to go back to Mrs. Swoffer, but to
stay with her. She presented me with
fifty pounds, and once I'm promoted I'm
to have a large allowance; and for the
future I am to consider myself her boy,
and by a few little hint, she let fall, I
fancy you are her girl!"
"Not I," cried Esme. with a laugh of
incredulity. "However, as long as she is
good to you she is doubly good to me."
"And now. Esme to turn to another
subject for a change what about this
chap. Miles Brabazon?"
"Oh, I was going to tell you, Ted; I got
a desperate fright this morning, what our
Irish laundrymaid calls 'a regular turn.'
I was talking to him down by the river
"About what?" interrupted Teddy, in
quisitively. "Never you mind; I was down by the
river, and in pulling out my handkerchief
I dragged out that new photo you gave
me last night; it fell precisely at his feet.
"Tableau, indeed!" grinning. "And
what did he say? what did he do?"
"Of course I pounced on it at once,
but he wa. too .harp for me; he got hold
of it first, and handed it back without
looking at it; but he did not appear to be
over and above well pleased.". .
"And pray why not?"
"Why not? you ridiculoua wooden-headed
Teddy; because I believe he thought
it saa some lover ot mine.'
"The "deuce he did!" puffing oat dead.
"And I rather fancy that he could be
"You don't aay so! Well, and so could
I if I was engaged to a girl and caught
her carrying other fellow.' portrait,
about her person. I suppose be asked
you no questions, and you told him bo
. "I say, Esme," confidentially, are you
going to marry him? to come to the point,
a. they say."
"I don't know," she replied, with per
"Don't know! what rubbish. You know
your own mind, surely, by this time."
"I'm to give him an answer in a week,"
said his sister, ia a low tone. "And now,
Teddy, I want to know if you will grant
me a great favor," in a coaxing tone,
standing up and laying her hand implor
ingly upon hi. arm. "Let me tell Miles."
"No; sorry to refuse yoo, my dear
child, but that la just the very thing 1
cannot allow you to do. Can t yon hold
oa a bit? There s bo hurry.
"Oh, but there la." she returned, eag
erly. "So many thing, most seem so
strange to him my rushing out and hug
ging him by mistake, as I told you; that
photograph thia morning, and .other
tilings. It', like Uving in a powder mill
any moment there may be an explosion
Do, please, please, let me tell him!" she
pleaded eagerly. "IF becoming ex
tremely red, but the kind darkness con
cealed the fact "if I he," stammering.
"we are to be married, the sooner you
know one another the better; and
should like to introduce you."
"I dare say," scornfully, "and walk up
to him with me in to, and say, 'Per
mit me to present my brother leddy
alias Sergt. Brown, of the Prince's Lan
cers,' and I wogld have to salute him and
call him 'Sir,' as would bent a non-com
missioned officer, and it would be a very
pretty little picture altogether. I could
uever feel the same to him if I met him
by and by on an equal footing. It may
seem ridiculous nonsense and vanity to
you, but it ia juat my one weakness, and
I should like to put my best foot fore
most, and appear to the best advantage
to your husband, old lady, when we meet
as brother officers, and there', no yawn
ing gulf between us; and, with a sud
den start of surprise, "here he is; at
least, I suppose that thia is he, this fel
low in evening clothe, coming down the
"It is, it is!" she gasped. "Oh, Ted,'
creeping closer to her brother, and speak
ing in an agonized undertone, "what shall
we do if he discovers us?
Keep cool," returned Teddy, impera
tively. "Get well behind the table and
don't sneeze or crunch the gravel with
your shoes. It's a. dark as pitch in here
to anyone outside. Imagine his face,1
tie continued, in a smothered whisper, "if
be were to walk in and find hia pretty
Esme tete-a-tete with a sergeant of Lan
cers! Ills feelings would be what you
might call mixed! I suppose he would
"If he docs find ns, Teddy, you must
tell!" returned his sister hysterically,
crowding still nearer to her companion,
and scarcely daring to breathe, as she aat
with her gase riveted on the unconscious
cause of her trembling trepidation.
(To be continued.)
MIRROR WRITING ODD MALADY.
Its Victims Have Faculty of Inacrlbtaaj
An almost unique case of nervous dis
ease was investigated at tbe last sitting
of tbe French Academy of Medicine.
The patient is a young Roumanian,
whose malady bag been observed by
Dr. Marinesco of Bucharest. The most
curious manifestation of his disease
takes the shape of what Is known
among scientists as "mirror writing,"
which means that tbe characters are
written backward, so that when re
flected in a mirror they are to be read
in the ordinary way. Dr. Marinesco
had observed that the bands of his pa
tient when unoccupied were affected
with a nervous trembling, wbicb ceased
to a great extent when they were used
for a definite purpose. Wishing to see
what effect this symptom of the mal-
a " bad on tne nanuwnting ur. ai.-
inesco asked the patient tc write a few
lines from dictation. To his astonish
ment he found that the entire passage
bad been written backward with abso
The experiment was repeated several
times with exactly the same result, and
It Is, In fact, impossible for the patient
to write otherwise. When asked to
trace a word with his foot on the
ground it, too, was found to be written
backward. Tbe patient being a Jew,
a final experiment was made with He
brew. Thia language, as Is well known,
is always written backwards, but the
patieut, reversing, as usual, tbe normal
process, can only write It from left to
right. Partial cases of mirror writing
have been observed before, but none In
which the tendency was so Irresistible.
Pall Mall Gazette.
Frank I knew Penn would be a
poet when he was a baby.
Ida What were the symptoms?
Frank He was found in a basket on
Ida I don't see anything in that
Frank Yes, but it waa a waste bask
A Real Oenlua.
The man that sharpened shoe pegs
at both ends and sold them for wheat
was a genius, but he has bis equal In
Mexico. Some time ago one of the
habitual revolutionary flare-ups was
lbout to commence in one of the bel
ligerent little South American Presi
dencies which masquerade under the
title of republics. A couple of hundred
men marshaled In opposition to the
government, swore solemn oaths, and
met nightly in an abandoned hut at
the entrance to a swamp. Enthusiasm
was plentiful, bat arms were scarce;
o a purse was made up, and three of
the party set off to bay ammunition.
They went to Mexico, where a cargo
jf powder ;ras delivered to them, and,
after Inspection, was shipped to the
revolutionary headquarters. A signal
gun waa mounted on a hilltop, and
when the day and hoar arrived the
3cld marshal of the revolutionary army
touched a match to the fuse of the
piece There waa no response. The
marshal used all the matches In his
silver matchbox, bat tbe gun refused
to fire. An Investigation by the "War
Office" followed, and that cargo of
powder proved to be nothing but ma
hogany sawdust, wbicb had been vig
orously stirred np with powdered
graphite to give It the proper color and
THROUQH OTHER EYES.
B HAD been sent by one of tbe
large downtown stores to lay a
carpet In the spar bedroom. He
whistled merrily in the intervals
when his mouth waa not full of tacks
and although hia face was lined with
care, there was a good-natured twinkle
In his eye and he went about his work
as one who enjoyed it.
The young mistress of the house had
come into the room and was watching
him from tbe window seat, the only
available resting place In the room.
Her frame of mind was of the deepest
cerulean hue, and she considered her
self an exceptionally unfortunate
woman. Her husband had that morn
ing informed her that, owing to unex
pected reverses In business, they would
not be able to go to the seashore, as
they had planned to do, and. In fact,
they could not leave the city, but must
be content this year to test the attrac
tion of St. Louis as a summer re
sort. There would be nothing to do,
therefore, la the way of recreation but
te ride ever the well-known boulevards
and attend the theater once In a while.
The dressmaker who bad been engaged
to plan and make a number of fetch
ing gowns and other "confections"
must be informed that her services
would not be needed, and altogether
the mistress of the house considered
this life to be a very disappointing af
fair, one which, when taken ail in all,
waa by no means worth the trouble
tfha watched the man In moody si
lence. Why did ha take any Interest
la his occupation? How could he be
happy when for him the future evi
dently contained nothing bnt work?
She wondered how life appeared as
seen through his eyes. She felt like
talking to him; she wanted to learn
something of hia history; but there was
the rat-tat-tat of the hammer to drown
an conversation, even had he been able
to apeak distinctly with the tacks In
Whan hia task waa nearly finished,
and when he was pouring the last re
maining tacks from the paper Into his
hand, aha asked tentatively:
. "Have yon a large family of chil
dren?" "No children at all. ma'am, and I
goeas It's a blessing I haven't the way
things have turned out," he replied
"Ton have had some trouble In sup
porting yourself, then, I conclude T"
"Myself? Gracious! It wouldn't
be any trouble to provide for myself.
Anything', good enough for me. But
yoa sea ail my life long I've had some
body an my hands to take care of.
I was Just a small kid, though I was
the oldest of five, when my father died.
Then mother said:
"'Joe, yon are a little fellow, but
yon avast do what yon can to support
the other children.' And so I went to
work, and you might aay I never waa
a child from that minute. Then
mother she married again, because she
thought It would be better for us chil
dren, she said. My stepfather was a
good-hearted man. bnt not one that
ver could set the river afire, and after
awhile he met with an accident that
crippled him for life, and I had him on
my hands, too.. Tbe other children
grew up and married off, bnt none of
em ever seemed to have a place in
their homes or any money for father
and mother. I was Jbe oldest, you
know, and they'd got into the habit
like of depending on me. I guess it
was nothing more than natural that
"Then Aunt Jane, my stepfather's
oldest sister, came from Iowa on a
visit She was considerably d rawed
np with rheumatism, and she said she
thought the trip would do her good.
That was ten years ago, and she la
with ns yet"
'Why, you have no right to sup
port her. She Is not related to yon in
the slightest degree."
"That's so, but then, she ain't related
to my brothers and sisters, either, so
they couldn't be expected to take her.
She has no money, no other relatives
of ber own, and no place else to go.
Naturally, I've got to look after her.
She'd be a heap more agreeable,
though, if she wasn't so cranky and
fond of finding fault If tbe tea I.
green she wishes It was black, and If
It's black, she's sorry 'taln't green, and
so on. Bnt then, we all have our
faults." He placed a tack on the
edge of the carpet and hammered It in.
'I should think any home would be
unpleasant that contained such a
woman," remarked the mistress of the
house when the noise of the hammer
He smiled. "Well, with her remarks
and with father and mother always
hectoring more or less, our place ain't
always what you'd call gay. But I've
found that tbe best way to be happy
la not to think too much about yes
terday, but get all tbe good yoo can
eat of to-day. And there's a good deal
that's pleasant to be found, after all.
If we'll only look for It"
"It Is not surprising that you were
not able to morry," she said, ignoring
his philosophy. -
"Oh, but I am married!" and hit
ragged features were Illuminated by1
a brilliant smile. Then he drove in
"With four grown people to support
two of them Invalids you most have
a hard life, no matter how yon look at
H, and yet yon struck me, somehow,
aa being a very happy man."
"And so I am." be returned, still
nailing. "The richest man in St Louis
er McKlBley himself ain't any happier
than I am this day. I could sing at
Use top of my voice. I could even
dance If there was nobody to see me.
for i guess one of my feet must be a
Methodist, I am so awkward on the
floor." And he chuckled softly.
The hut tack was In now. He stood
up and surveyed his work with an ex
pression of satisfaction, and then be
gan to gather up his tools.
"Tell me about your marriage and
what it Is that makes you so happy,"
aid the mistress of the house per
He was quite willing to comply with
her request He slipped on his thread
bare coat, and, leaning, tall and un
gainly, against the doorpost, be folded
his arms and' began half apologeti
cally: "I know very well that I hadn't
ought to marry, there being circum
stances in ure wren a man has no
right to think of his own comfort
The rest all took it for granted that
I'd never marry, and I always said I
wouldn't But that was before I'd
seen Lizzie. X
"She was also alone la the world,
poor little thing, and worked In a res
taurant downtown. I couldn't afford
to take many meals at restaurants, as
you may guess, but I used to drop into
that one sometimes and order a dough
nut and a cup of coffee. If I couldn't
i:et a seat at Lizzie's table, I could
Watch ber wait on other people, and
even that was worth a good deal."
"Yon considered " her pretty, ol
"Yes, ma'am, as a picture. You'd
never see a prettier complexion, or
dearer blue eyes, or nicer hair, of a
light color, and soft aa a child's, and
ber hands were little bits of white
hands like a born lady's. She had
such a kind look on her face, too, and
wearing Ler white apron, alwaya so
pic and span clean, and that little
white cap. she looked like an angel to
me, though I expect angels don't ever
wear aprons-and caps.
"I don't know. I don't Indeed, how
I ever mustered np courage enough to
ask a girl like that to marry me. But
f did, and she said 'yes,' though I was
a good deal older than she waa, and
was poor, and nothing to look at Then
there came the dread of telling tbe
folks at home. I knew mighty well
they wouldn't like It, and they didn't
Father and mother were both awfully
huffy about It, and Aunt Jane was Just
wratby, said she'd always known that
men were selfish, but she hadn't
thought that even I could be so bad
as to take the bread out of my own
family s mouths to give to a stranger,
a silly girl, she said, who'd flaunt
'round and put all my wages on to bet
"Well, I did feel a little guilty when
they called me selfish, and I could un
derstand Just how they felt about It,
but I lost my temper and made Aunt
Jane keep quiet when she began on
"After we were married that was
four years ago my wife wanted to
keep right on in her old place, but I
wouldn't hear to It I'd married her
to take care of her, and I was going to
do it If I worked my lingers to the
bone. But she was such a good house
keeper and fine manager that she saved
money out of what I gave her for the
butcher and grocery man, and we Just
had loads of pleasure on what she
saved. Saturday she'd fix a lunch in
a basket and when my work was done
we'd meet some place, and go to tbe
park, where we'd have a little picnic
all to ourselves. In the winter we
sometimes went to the theater, not
the expensive ones where they cut and
slash around In grand style, but to the
JO-cent shows, where they come out and
sing and dance.
"It wasn't reasonable to expect that
such luxury and happiness could last
long, and it didn't Lizzie was taken
sick and had to go to the hospital, an J
there waa weeks and weeks of misery
for her and me. When obe came out
she was like a little ghost, and though
her eyes were as pretty as ever, she
couldn't see out it these, any more."
His voice faltered and his listener
"That Is very sad for both of yon."
"The doctors gave us a little hope,
but told ua not to build too much on it
They said that as her blindness was
caused by a surgical operation, and
not by a disease of the eye itself, she
might get ber sight back some tJn.e,
"She must have led a miserable life
all day with the old people, all of 'em
so fretful, and she all In the dark, but
the little woman never complained.
When I'd ask her about It she'd beg mi
not to talk about her. but to tell het
what I'd seen during the day. And I
need to tell her of the fine booses I'd
been In and of the ladles I'd seen, and
describe what they had oa, though I
don't think I could write for a fashion
book. I'd tell ber the funny thing,
that happened to make her laugh, and
s I don't see much really, being al
ways so busy when I'm In people's
houses, I got to making up lots and lota
of things that never happened. Why,
It was only yesterday that I told het
of a quarrel I'd heard between a fat
old man and a cross-eyed woman, and
neither of 'em ever lived in this world,
or any other. Ananias ain't la It with
"Bnt this morning, this blessed morn
ing,' while I was taking my breakfast
my wife got np from ber chair, and
putting her arms around my neck, be
gan to cry. 'Oh, Joe!" she says. Just
like that; 'Oh, Joe!"
It wasn't a bit like ber to act ao.
and I saya, astonished: - ,-
Why. Liz, what's tbe matter with
your And aba says, 1 can aaaf .
The mltrt-as of tbe house turned hei
head and looked out of the window,
'nit her eyes were veiled by a mist
St. Louis Star. -
JACK TO HIS OLD-LINE BOOKS
iacoarasjlnai Experiences of a Can
vasser with a Volume on Dog.
"I've gone back to my first love, the
ireat 'Celebrated Compendium of Cui-
.ersal Knowledge.' bound in calf and
.old at a price within reach of all."
i .aid the book agent to a Detroit Free
Press reporter. "The other day the
head member of tbe firm that I am
proud to represent called me Into bis
private office and showed me a book on
dogs, telling bow to take care of thein
what to feed, what to do for the uun.-e.
how to tell a mastiff from a pug. how
to Dandle a mad dog in fact, it was
a regular dog encyclopaedia, bound In
cloth, and sold at a popular price.
"Tbe moment I set eye. on that book
I saw great possibilities in it. 1 knew
from bitter experience that nearly
every one kept a dog, and no matter
what kind of a cross-eyed purp It
might be tbe owner couldn't be con
vinced that hi. particular dog wasn't
the finest dog on earth. I made up
my mind that there waa a fortune In
the sale of that book, and I secured the
exclusive light to this city before 1
left the office. Cautioning the head
member of the firm to keep the presses
jolng. so theie would be no possible
chance for a shortage, I started out
to place the great work before the pub
lic. The first house I struck my hopes
received a sudden chill.
I was no sooner In the yard thar
i big dog came tearing around the cor
uer of the house and made for me.
lbere was only one thin? to do, aud
I did It 1 made for a tree that was
near and managed to get out of the
way before the beast arrived. As he
.ibowed no desire to leave. I yelled fot
help. A man came to the door, and
after calmly looking the situation over
asked what I wanted.
" 'I am selling a work on dogs,' I said
rather weakly from my position in the
tree. 'It tells bow to cure tbe mange
what to feed, what to '
"'Well,' said be, cutting In, 'explain
it to Tlge, and If he cares about It I'll
buy It' With that he went inside and
shut the door.
"For two mortal hours that miserable
?ur sat uader the tree and licked hi
chops. Then tbe owner came to the
loor again and said it was time that
flge had his dinner, and that I could
finish explaining the book to him after
je got through. If be hadn't called
that dog away Just as he did Tlge
-would have had' his dinner right under
the tree, and the Arm would have been
short one book agent As far as Lam
concerned, every cussed dbg In this
ity may die of mange. In fact, I hope
Danger in Veils.
' A service has been done to women
;eneraily by Dr. G. A. Wood, ef Chl
ago, in tests made by him with sys-
.einatlc care to determine tbe danger,
f any. In the wearing of veils. For this
jurpose he selected a dozen typical
pecimena of the article and applied
he ordinary tests of ability to read
.vblle wearing them, and these tests
showed that every description of veil
iffects more or less the ability to see
listinctly, bath In the distance aud near
it hand, the most objectionable being
he dotted sort Other things elng
Hiual, vision Is Interfered with In direct
jroportlon to tbe number of meshes per
square Inch, and the texture of the ma
:erlal also plays an Important part In
he matter. Thus, when tbe sides of
che mesh are single compact threads
he eye Is much less embarrassed than
vhen the double threads are used, tbe
east objectionable veil, on the whole.
jelng that which Is without dots.
prays or other figures, but with large
ind regular meshes made with single
ind compact threads. Dr. Wood perti
nently remarks that while eye troublo
lo not necessarily result from wearing
rells for the healthy eye Is as able as
ny other part of the body to resist
egltlmate strain weak eyes are in
lured by them. New York Tribune.
Philippine Only Railway.
The Philippine Islands can boast of
jut one railway, running from tbe city
it Manila to Dagupin, a distance of
123 miles. This railway, however, if
Iret-class, so far as It goes. It has a
ilngle track of steel rails, la very well
sullt and the bridges along tbe route
ire of Iron or stone of excellent con
struct Ion. Tbe station buildings are all
well-built substantial edifices.
Consumption of Coffee.
The consumption of coffee the world
over is growing rapidly. The average
annual consumption In the decade 1870
to 1880 was 702,000,000 pounds; In the
next decade It was 1.820,000,000. Last
rear It was 1.580,000.000.
CESSIONS TO FOREIGN POWERS,
Territorial Oranta China H
front Tint to Time.
Each conflict in which China has en
gaged has resulted In a loss of terri
tory. The principal cessions made by
the Mongol government as tbe price of
peace have been the following. The
island of Formosa was ceded to Japan
In 1805, after the war with China. In
1897 Germany seized the port of KIou-
Chou on tbe east coast of tbe Shantung
peninsula, her excuse for so doing be
ing a massacre of missionaries wulcli
had taken place there. Two months
later ah received from Cblaa a ninety-nine-year
lease of the port and dis
trict In 18U8 Russia obtained from
China a twenty-five-year lease of Port
Arthur, TaUenwan and their adjacent
territories and waters. The lease enn
be extended by mutual agreement The
same year the Chinese government
gave permission for Great Britain to
occupy Wel-Hal-Wel for as long s
period as Russia shall hold Port Ar
thur. To compensate France for the
concessions glvea to Great Britain and
Russia a nlnety-nlne-year lease was
given her of the bay of Kwang-Cha.i- j
Wan, on the coast opposite the island
of Hainan, and last year two islands at
the ep trance of the bay were definitely
ceded to ber. Hong-Kong was ceded
to Great Britain in 184L
The unlucky man seldom betters hliv
self bf changing bis position.
ftabjeett CtitMren of KlngTh Kaval
Hons of Jasns, and tha Bun, I ha
Moon, tha Stars ant All Nalnra Ara
Its Heritage Crnas Its Herat,! le Sign.
VABHrxoTOtf. D. C In this discourse
Dr. Taltnsee who, during hia journey
homeward has seen much of rnval and im
perial splendors, in passing through the
capitals of Europe, shows that there is no
higher dignity nor more illustrious station
than those which the Christian has as a
child of God; text, Jniiges viii, IS: "Each
one renemheM the children of a king."
Zehah and Zalmunna had been off to
battle, and when they came ba-k thev
were asked what kind of people thev hml
seen. Thr- answered that the people had
a royal appearance; "each one resemWed
the children of a king." That description
of people is not extinct. Tb;re are still
many who have,Jhis appearance. Indeed,
they are the sons and daughters of the
Lord Almighty. Though now in exile,
they shall yet come to their thrones.
There are family names that stand for
wealth, or patriotism, or intelligence. The
name of Washington among us will al
ways represent patriotism. The family
of the Medici stood as the representative
of letters. The familv of the Rothschilds
is significant of wealth, the loss of $,
000,000 in 1848 putting them to no incon
venience, and within a few vears they
have loaned Russia $12,000,000; Nanles.
25,O00.000; Austria, 40,000,000, and Knu
land, $200000.000. and the stroke of their
pen on the couiitine room desk shakes
everything from the Irish .Sea to the Dan
ube. They open their hand, and there is
wr; they shut it and there is peace.
The Romanoffs of Russia, the Holienzol
lerna of Germany, the Bourbons of
France, the Stuarts and Guelphs of Great
Britain are houses whose names are inter
twined with the history of their respective
nations symbolic of imperial authority..
But I preach of a family more potential,
more rich and more extensive the rovnl
house of Jesus, of whom the whole family
in heaven and on earth is named. Wc are
blood relations by the relationship of the
cross; all of us are the children of the
First, I speak of our family name. When
we see a descendant of some one greatly
celebrated in the last century, we look at
him with profound interest. To have had
conquerors, kings or princes in the ances-
iral line gives lustre to the family name,
n our line was a King and Conqueror.
The Star in the East with baton of light
woke up the eternal orchestra that maile
music at His birth. From thence He
started forth to conquer all nations, not
by trampling them down, but by lifting
them np. St. John saw Him on a white
horse. When He returns He will not
bring the nations chained to His wheel or
in iron cages, but I hear the stroke of the
hoofs of the snow-white cavalcade that
bfings them to the gates in triumph.
Our family name takes lustre from the
star that heralded Him, and the spear that
pierced Him, and the crown that was
given Him; It gathers fragrance from the
frankincense brought to His cradle, and
the lilies that flung their sweetness into
His sermons, and the box of alabaster that
broke at His feet. The Comforter at
Bethany. The Resurrector at Nain. The
supernatural Oculist at Bethsaida. The
Saviour of one world, and the chief joy of
another. The storm His frown. The sun
light His smile. The spring morning II is
breath. The earthquake the stamp of His
foot. The thunder the whisper of His
voice. The ocean a drop on the tip of His
finger. Heaven a sparkle on the bosom
of His love. Eternity the twinkling of
His eye. The universe the flying dust of
His chariot wheels. Able to heal a heart
break or hush a tempest, or drown a
world, or flood immensity with His glory.
What other family name could ever boast
of such an illustrious personage?
Henceforth, swing out the coat of arms!
Great famines wear their coat of arms on
the dress, or on the door of the coach, or
on the helmet when they go out to battle,
or on flags and ensigns. The heraldic
sign is sometimes a lion, or a dragon, or
an eagle. Our coat of arms worn right
over the heart hereafter shall be a cross,
a lamb standing under it, and a
dove flying over it. Grandest of ail es
cutcheons! Most significant of all family
escutcheons! Iu every battle I must have
it mazing on my nag the Hove, tne cross,
the Iamb, and when I full, wrap me in
that good old Christian flag, so -that the
familv coat of arms shall be right over
my breast, that all the world may see that
i looked to the Dove of tbe tuurit and
clung to the Cross, and depended upon
the Lamb of God, which taketh away the
in of the world.
Ashamed of Jesus, that dear friend,
On whom my hopes of life deend;
No! When I blush, be this my shame
That I no more revere His name.
Next. I sneak of the family sorrows. If
trouble come to one member of the family
all feel it. It is the custom, after the
body is lowered into the grave, for all the
relatives to come to the verge of the grave
and look down into it. First those near
est the departed come, then those next of
Km, until tney nave all looked into the
grave, oo, wben trouble ana griel go
qown through the heart of one member
of the family, they go down through
them all. The sadness of one is the sad-
ot all. A company ot persons loin
hands around an electric battery; the
two Dersons at the ends of the line touch
the battery and all the circle feels the
shock. Thus, by reason of the filial, ma
ternal and paternal relations of life, we
stand so close together that when trouble
sets its battery, all teel the thrill ot dis
tress, in the great Christian family the
sorrow of one ought to be the sorrow of
all. Is one persecuted? All are perse
cuted. Does one suffer loss? We all suf
fer loss. Is one bereaved? We arc all be
reaved. Their streaming eyes together now
For human guilt and mortal woe.
11 yuu ityu.-iT ui- anuLiit-i miAiuiiuiic.
you are not one of the sheep, but one of
the goats, and the vulture of sin hath
alighted on your soul, and not the Dove
ot the spirit.
Next, I notice the family property. Af
ter a man of large estate dies the relatives
assemble to hear the will read. So much
of the property is willed to his sons, and
so much to h,s daughters, and so much to
benevolent societies. Our Lord Jesus hath
died, and we are assembled to-day to hear
the will read. He says, "My peace I give
unto you." Through His apostle He says,
"All things are yours." What, everything?
Yes, everything! This world and the
next! In distinguished families there are
old piotures hanging on the wall. They
are caucd the "heirlooms" of the estate.
They are very old, and have come dbwn
from generation to generation. So I look
npon all the beauties of the natural world
as the heirlooms of our royal family. The
morning breaks from the east. The mists
travel up, hill above hill, mountain above
mountain, until sky lost. The forests are
full of chirp, and buzz, and song. Tree's
leaf and bird's wing flutter with gladness.
Honeymakers in the log, and beak against
the bark, and squirrels chattering on the
rail, and the call ot the hawk out of a
clear sky make you feel glad.
the sun. which kindles conflagrations
among the castles of cloud and sets mina
ret and dome aflame, stoops to paint the
lilv white, and the buttercup yellow, and
the forgetmenot blue. . What can resist
the sun? Light for the voyager over the
deep! Light for the shepherd guarding
the flocks afield! Light for the poor who
have no lamps to turn! Light for the
downcast and the lowly! Light for ach
ing eyes and burning brain and wasted
eantlve! Light for the smooth brow of
childhood and for the dim vision of the
octn-enarian! Litht for nueen's coronet
ind for sewing girl's needle! Let there be
light! Whose mornins is thf? My morn
ing. Your morning. Our Father save us
the Picture and hun it on the sky in loons
of fire. It is the hei'lonm of one familv.
And as the nisht. Tt the f'H moon.
i h m'.is from shore to hnre steam like
hattc-ed mirrors, and the ocean nnder
her glance eomes un with great tide,
panting upon the beach, mingling, as it
were, fnnm and fire. The noor man
blesses God for throwing snch a eheao
light through the broken window pane
into his cabin, and to the sirk it iwrnn a
livht from the other shore which hounds
this great deep of human nain and woe.
ff the sun seem like a song fulj and nonred
from brazen, instruments that fill heaven
nd ryrth with meat harmoniff. the moon,
is plaintive and mild, standing heneh
the throne of God. sending up her soft,
weet voice of praise, while the stars listen
and the sea. No mother ever more sweet
Iv guarded the sick cradle than all night loig
this pale watcher of the sky bends over the
wearv. heartsick, slumbering earth. Whose v
is th! black framed, black tnsseled pii-ti"-
' the nl"ht? It is the heirloom of
our family. Ours . the grandeur of th
spring, the crystals of the snow, the co-M
of the beach, the odors of the gardpn, the
harmonies of the air.
Yog cannot see a large estate in nna
morning. Yon must take several ws'lrs
around it. The familv propertv of this
royal house of Jesus is so great thnt we
must take several walks to get anr iil"a
of its extent. Let the first walk be
around this earth. All these valWs. th
harvests that wave in them, and the c
tle thnt pasture them a'l th" mount
ains, and the precious things hidden le
neath them, and the crown of iHarir thev
cast at the feet of the alpine hnrrirane
all these lakes, these islands. thse wnti
nents, are onrs. In the second walk rr
among the street lamps of heaven. nt
see stretching off on everv side a wilder
ness of worlds. For us they shine. For
us they sang at a Pavionr's nativitr. rr
ns thev will wheel into line, and w;th
their flaming torches add to the sn'endor
of our triumph on the day for which Ml
other days were made. In the third walk,
go around the eternal city. As we come
near it, hark to the rush of its chariots
and the wedding peal of its great towers.
The bell of heaven has struck 12. It is
hieh noon. We look off upon the rhnn
leta which never fade, the eves thnt never
weep, the temples that never, close, the
loved ones that never part, the procession
that never halts, the trees that never
wither, the walls that never can be cap
tured, the sun that never sets, until we
can no longer gaze, and we hide our eves
and exclaim: "Eye hath not seen, nor ear
heard, neither have entered into the hrnrt
of man, the things which God hnth tire
pared for them that love Him!" As these
tides of glory rise we have to retreat and
hold fast lest we be swept off and drowned
in the emotions of gladness and thanksgiv
ing and triumph.
Almost every family looks back to a
homestead some country place where
you grew np. You sat on the doorsill.
You heard the footsteps of the rain on
the garret roof. You swung on the gate.
You ransacked the bam. You waded into
the brook. You thrashed the orchard for
apples, and the neighboring woods for
nuts, and everything around the old
homestead ia of interest to you. I tell y.iu
of the old homestead of eternity. "In
Mv Father's house are manv mansions."
When we talk of mansions we think of
Chatsworth and its park, nine miles in
circumference, and its conservatory that
astonishes the world; its galleries of art,
that contain the triumphs of Chant rev,
Canova and Thnrwaldsen :' of the kimts -and
the queens who have walked its state-'
ly halls, or, flying over the heather, have
hunted the grouse. But all the dwelling
places of dukes and princes and queens are
as nothing to the family mansion that is
already awaiting our arrival The hand
of the Lord Jesus lifted (lie pillars and
swung the doors, an t planted the park.
Angels walk there, and the good of all
ages. The poorest man in that house is n
millionaire, and the lowliest a king, an I
the tamest word he sneaks is an anthem,
and the shortest life an eternity.
It took a Paxton to build for Chats
worth a covering for the wonderful flower
Victoria regia, five feet in diameter. Hut
our lily of the valley shall need no shelter
from the blast, and in the open gardens of
God shall put forth its full bloom, and all
heaven shall come to look at it, and its
aroma shall be as though tiie cheruliitn
had swung before the throne a thousand
censors. I have not seen it yet. I am in
a foreign land. But my Father is waiting
for me to come home. I have brother
and sisters there. In the llilile I have let
ters from there, telling me what a fine
place it is. it matters not much to me
whether I am rich or poor, or whether ti:e
world hates me or loves me, or whether I
go by land or by sea, if only I may lift
my eyes at last on the family mansion. It
is not a frail house, built in a month, soon
to crumble, but an old mansion, which is
as firm as the dav it was built. Its walls
are covered with the ivy of many ages,
and the urns at the gateway are a-b)oom
with the century plants of eternity. The
Queen of Shelia hath walked its hall, and
Esther, and Marie Antoinette and Lady
Huntingdon and Cecil, and Jeremy Taylor,
and Samuel Rutherford and John Milton,
and the widow who gave two mites, and
the poor men from the hospital these
last two perhaps outshining ail the kings
and queens of eternity
What clasping of hands! What emlirac
ings! What coming together of lip to lip!'
What tears of joy! ou say, "1 thought
there were no tears in heaven." There
must be, for the Bible says that "(iod
shall wipe them away," and if there were
no tears there, how could He wie them
away? They cannot be tears of grief or
tears of disapiointment. They must lie
tears of gladness. Christ will come ami
say: "What! Child of heaven, is it too
much for thee? Dost thou break down
under the gladness of this reunion? Then
1 Will help thee." And, with His one arm
around us and the other arm around our
loved ones. He shall hold us up iu the
While I speak some of you with broken
hearts can hardly hold your peace. You
:e u ... .v ...
ictti an ,i juu ntiuni niiuhk urn. aim ty.
"Oh, blessed day! Beed on. Toward thee
I press with blistered feet over the desert
way. My eyes fail for their weeping. I
faint from listening for feet that will not
come, and the sound of voices that will
not speak. Sjieed on, oh day of reunion!
And then. Lord Jesus, be not angry with
me if after I have kissed Tliy blessed feet.
I turn around to gather up the long lost
treasures of my heart. Oh! be not angry
with me. One look at Thee were heaven.
But all these reunions are heaven encir
cling heaven, heaven overtopping heaven,
heaven commingling with heaven!"
I was at Mount Vernon, and went into
the dining room in which our first Presi
dent entertained the prominent men of
this and other lands. It was a very inter
esting spot. But, oh, the banqueting hall of
the family mansion of which I speak!
Spread the table, spread it wide; for a
great multitude are to it at it. I'roiii
the tree by the river gather the twelve
manner of fruits for that table. Take the
clusters from the heavenly vineyards, and
press them into the golden tankards tor
that table. On baskets carry in the bread
of which, if a man eat. he shall never hun
ger. Take all the shot-torn flags of cart li
ly conquest and entwine them among the
arches. Let David come with his harp,
and Gabriel with his trumpet, ami Miriam
with the timbrel, for the prodigals are at
home, and the captives are free, ami the
Father hath invited the mightv of heaven
and the redeemed of earth to coiue aud
Cost of Raising Wheat and Corn.
Statistics which hure been collated
In Wisconsin show the averuge cost of
raising wheat to be 54 cents a bushel,
and tbe cost of corn 27 cents. In both
cases there is Included Interest on
the value of the land, with tbe cost of
Implements and horses added in.
The Nest Quntioiu
"Excuse me, sir," said the census
enumerator, briskly, aftr the name
and age bad been duly recorded, "but
what la your occupation?"
"I am a poet."
"But what do you do for a living V