GOLOeN-ftttX' Wben tbe front of the totMt ra whit ca the craw And the leave of the forest were red, 'A lover went wooing a sweet little laja Whose father forbade her te wed. But he wrapped her about ia the eleak that he wore And bore her away oa his steed From the cabia of logs with Its 1tt-bob door And its marigolds gois te sees. The branches were low la the path that they west; Through the heart of the wood It was worn; And though down to the hora of the sad dle she bent The plume from her bonnet waa torn. The brightest ef yellow, behind theaa 'twas blown. And fluttered a clew en the trail. For the father who followed e'er stabble and stone In his eagerness, breathless aad pale. Bat whether the thrash was a wisard la brown Or the squirrel a fairy la for, When he came to the path turalaf lata the town i There was only a cricket astir. Where the feather had fallen a arose Like gold from the baehea aad lid at-ill In (ha hannta a tha a.tar IS blows When the samae has Walled Ma area. Moosey's Magazine. WITCH AND I. Witch and I bad a quarrel! Who la It that says It takes two to make a cuarrel? Whoever It Is makes a mis take. It took only one to make our ti'.iairel, and that was nfy precious Aunt Betsy Jane. Witch has a temper; tio have I. She wasn't christened Witch. God fathers and mothers have much to answer for, still I saver heard o" their giving Witch as a baptismal iume to a Christian child. No, her name la Julia Felicia, wbl:h la simply absurd. Fancy a little dark-eyed, be witching five feet nothing having a nniue like that. My iiui:i- is John, and Jahn Tm al ways called. Had I been christened Robert or Thomas I should have been called either of those plain, sensible rruiucs. There is nothing for the Imag ination to catch bold of la 07 face or figure. I'm not six feet Is my stock lrgs; I'm ouly five feet tea. 1 haven't crisp, golden hair" and a "tawny beard." So; my eyes, balr and beard sie brown, and for the rest I have non descript features and good teeth. More over, as I said before, I have a temper, a vile one, and U all things, apart from my profession, am a born fool. It was over a game of tennis that Aunt Kesty Jane made us quarrel. Witch diilu't play up and I "slated iicr. I've "slated" Witch ever since I've known her, and I've known her since she was 10, so abe ought to have tot used to it. For the matter of that, elie wouldn't have bothered her bead pbout It if It hadn't been for my be ljveil aunt Wltcb slates me ferocious ly sometimes, but it never makes any clfTerence. Weil. it. was at one of Mrs. Dougal's "a t homes" that the row began. Witch, M'.ss White, Dougal and I were playing tenuis. Dougal and Miss White were against us. As a rule Witcb licks the oilier fi'i: into flta, but on this occasion, for some reason or other, abe missed reai ly every ball. I was annoyed, and 1 expressed myself perhaps a little more strongly than I ought to have clone, but I'm sure I said nothing one whit stronger than I've said scores )f time without auy offense being taken. He that ns It may. Witch refused to ploy any mure and went aad sat down by Aum P.etcy Jane. 1 am a doctor, and soon afte.- that someone fetched me away. It was a bud ease, and 1 didn't get home till mid night. In the dining-room some cold meat and beer were waiting for me; so was a note from Witch. I ate a moutb lul ami rlrauk a glass of beer, then I cpened the note. For a moment I felt as If I had a knife In my heart. It was such a cruel stab. Witch my little Witch would have nothing more to do with me. My conduct at Mrs. Dougal's bad proved to her that she no longer possessed my respect, and without re tpect love was not likely te but long, etc. She ended by saying that she would have returned my ring, but could not remove It from her finger, but that she would get the Jeweler to cut It off to-morrow. I smiled a grim smile at the Inst sentence. I had no Intention of bliowin? that ring to be cut off. The lovely euusion puziled me alto gether. It wasn't in Wltch'a usual style. Naturally, a note of that kind coming from her would have run In this way: "John, I bate and detest you, and hope you'll keep out of my sight 1c rever," or something like It Well, I weut to bed. I was such an ass tbat I never slept a wink all night, but I made up my mind what I would do. I gut up early and made a good break fast; then I went Into the surgery, aaw pjy assisant. talked ever the cases and told him I should be away all day. After that I went to town, straight to Witch's father's office. He hadn't ar rived, but his people knew me and allowed me Into his private room. He cud I are great friends always have been. So It was quite natural for me to go to him for advice, or, rather, to talk over things. When be came in be seemed rather surprised at seeing me, but after he had shaken hands be looked over his letters, gave some dl lections and then, looking calmly a me, said: "Now, John." Tan yon spare me half an hour, sir? "So far as I know. Go ahead." "Well, I'm making 5,000 a year and my practice Is Increasing." "That's good." "Don't you think Wltcb and I might marry on that'" "Certainly." I The Pill that Will. f . mi (!) "The pjil that will." implies the pills that won't. Their name ia legion. The name of "the pill that will" ia Ayer's Cathartic Pill. It is a rill to rely on. Properly used it will cure con stipation, biliousness, sick headache, and the other ills that result from torpid liver. Ayer's pills are not designed to spur the liver into a momentary activity, leaving it in yet more incapable condition after the immediate effect is. past. They are compounded with the pur pose of toning up the entire system, removing the obstructing conditions, and putting the liver into proper relations with the rest of the organs for natural co-operation. The record of Ayer's Pills during the half century they have been in public use establishes their great and permanent value in all liver affections. Ayer's Cathartic Pills. (?) 0 "Ton have no abjection to our mu rjlag next month, if she consents? "None. I have a wish that aba should marry at ail, bnt It aha moat marry, I'd rather aha married 70 than anyone else " "Thank yon, air, far saying that. Thank yen veer much," said I, grateful ly, salving hla hand and wringing tt hard. "Just so," said he. removing It from my grasp and looking anxiously at It. "Bat why this fervorr I pnt Witch's precious epistle la front f him. He read it twice through at tendvely, put It down, aad loo king calmly at me said: "Very Interesting! Bnt scarcely te be regarded as a prelude to very speedy matrimony, I should think." "Ah, bnt it la, air. a girl doeant write a note like that and have doae with It No, ahe continues to write them, I shall probably get a afmllar note once a month now and that will be very tiring. I give yon my word that I did not aleep a wink laat night The practice won't stand that aert ef thing' long, yon know," said I earnestly. "Tea eeem to have an accurate knowledge of women aad their ways," he remarked dryly. ! allowed that speech te paaa wltbeat eommeat Comment seemed uperfln na. "If I might ask, I should Uke te know whom yon would consider In fault In thla little misunderstanding?" he asked. " "I am, air. It stands te reason; I (hould not be so anxious If ahe were In fault," and then I explained the whole matter, finishing up with, "I can't re-j member exactly what I called her, bat whatever It waa I didn't mean It" "I am not able to refresh your mem ory to what you said on that occasion, but I can tell you what I have heard you call her myself," said Mr. Droit, quietly. And then he told me. His tone was a revelation te me. Not that I'd call Witch anything worse than a "little fool." But I realize what !t must have sounded like to the beav ers, and to him, her father! I don't know bow I looked, hat I felt mean, cheap, worthless. Utterly so, I began to stumble out apologies. He waved bla hand. "All rlgbt." said be. "but you see your language Is at all times forcible." He Is a wise man, so he said no mere. He showed his wisdom therein, for I went at once to aee Witch In a very contrite frame of mind. I waa ready to make a mat of myself and let toy darling trample on me If It should so please her, or to do any other extrava gant thing, such waa the depth ef my bumtlity. Still, as I journeyed Putney ward I wondered as to who could have stirred up the strife between us. Sud denly it flashed across my mind tbat Witch bad seated herself beside Aunt Betsy Jane, and that Aunt Betsy Jane was her godmother and therefore li censed to interfere. I am not going to explain how Aunt Betsy Jane came te be Witch's godmother. I am not a lady novelist and therefore don't think It necessary to explain everything. It has nothing to do with thla story; besides, 1 was only 6 years old when ahe was christened and wasn't consulted as to ber sponsors. To be sure. It must have been Aunt Betsy Jane who suggested the letter. When I arrived at the Cedars it waa tbout 12 o'clock. If all went well peace would reign between Wltcb and myself In an hour. And if so I would take ber off to Richmond, get a boat from Mea sum's, row up the river, come to an chor In a backwater I knew of between Richmond and Hampton and then make Ltr name the day. But things didn't go well; they went exceedingly badly instead. When Amelia (Amelia is the Druitt' housemaid) opened the door aid I Inquired for Witch ahe aald. "Miss Druitt Is not well, air, but I'll tell her you're here." Then she showed me Into the dining room. This was omlnousl In the Drultts' menage it Is customary to see people who come on business dress makers, laundresses, servants seeking places In the dining-room before lunch. Amelia left me and went upstairs. I rapidly diagnosed the situation. I took cut my pocketbook and wrote: "My darling, I shall wait In the old boat at the end of the lawn till you can see me," tvd then I signed it "John." Amelia came back. "If yon please, sir. Miss Druitt does not feel equal to seeing you to-day, but will write to yon 10 night." "Exactly," said I, quietly. "Can yon clve me an envelope? Thanks. Give tbat te Miss Druitt please." The maid left the room and I wenv Into the garden. At the bottom ef the garden ran the river; chained to a post was an old boat It was seldom need, as the spot was not picturesque, but It was secluded, hidden both from the bouse and from passing boats by thick. drooping willows. It waa here that Witch and I bad come to the conclu sion that we could not live without each ether. I aat down In the boat feeling very wroth with Witch and bitter against Aunt Betsy Jane. I would have given much to know If she were in the bouse at tbat moment I thought out all I had heard of the days of her youth. I felt mean and spiteful. I be thought me of an old Incident In her life wherein Aunt Betsy Jane bad sailed very near the wind and had a narrow escape of social wreck. I ought to have forgotten It but I am not heroic. Both morally and phyalc- ally I am commonplace. That la to aay, if I'm struck I hit back, or try to. Would you believe it? I sat In that host except when I got up and stretch ed mvself, until S o clock! It waa near ly dark, and when I heard the clock strike I swore to myself that if Wltcb u'd not appear before the chiming of tbe chiming of the quarter I would row tbe old boat down to the bridge, give a boy sixpence to bring It back, id well, when Witch wanted me she might aend for me. That was alll tt matt bare beca very near the quar ler when I aaw stealing down the gar ten, her head and shoulders wrapped up In a white cloud, my Witch. At bant I thought ae at first. Bat I noon saw It wasn't It waa someone more kin aad leas kind. Nevertheless, as the rorm drew near, peering about In tba dusk, I sprang forward, caught her la iiy anna and kissed her. She had no breath with which to utter a sound. She could eal? liatea te my ardent far more ardent thaa I ever bestowed en Witch expressions of affection. "My darling r I went on. "I knew yea would never have made auch a lit tle fool of yourself If It hadn't been for that mallei oas catamaran. Aunt Betsey jane." The form within my arma struggled. I waa holding her tightly or my face might have suffered. "But 111 tell yon a tale, dear, about her. I'm the only living soul that knows, now old nurse la dead." Ton couldn't beat the form breathe, so stlU It waa. I went en: "Aunt Betsey Jane la 49 now" the form wriggled "abent twenty-five years ago" I could hear ler heart beat I relented "No, Witch, 1 will not tell yen that story! Ton have tome te me aad I east afford te pity A tint Betsey Jane. She waa badly need when ahe waa young and ahe can't bear to aee people happy new ahe Is eld." The form mattered. I evened my arma "Want to fetch something, dear. You shall. Only come back at once, or ; shall feel Uke teUlng tbat old tale about Aunt Betsy Jane." She scuttled off to the house and In a cilnute or two Witch came down tbe garden In a very dignified manner. I et her come right to the edge of the water and peer about I knew sue couldn't see me. Presently abe aald, anxiously: "John!" My heart jumped, but I didn't In tend to give myself away, so I simply said, "Well!" Bat she didn't Intend to rfve herself away, either. She turned. Then I aaw that I had my work cut out for me. -Stay. Witch; I'm In the boat" I ex claimed In a tone of deepeat entreaty, ae I scrambled on shore. She paused. ! caught bold of her hand. "Witch." I f.i ed, reproachfully, "I've been waiting hi re for nearly eight hours and I'm so faint I can hardly apeak." That fetched her! A woman will go cheerfully for hours without a crumb, do yards and yarda of ahopplng on a halfpenny bun and think nothing of it, but let a man only aay be missed his lunch and they make as much fuss over him as If he bad Buffered the martyr dom of St Lawrence! "You poor thing!" exclaimed my dar ling. "Come In at once and have some thing to eat." "No, Witch," I aald, faintly, but firm ly; "you must forgive me." "Forgive you! Of course I forgive you. I didn't know you had been here all that time. Do come in at once or you'U die. I know you will." But I stuck to my guns and I didn't go Indoors until I had made Witch promise that we should be married that day month. Then I consented to go in tnd work mighty havoc among tbe eat ables. Aunt Betsy Jane came to our wedding and made us a handsome present Then be went to live with some friends In the North. I think the poor old soul had had some suspicion I knew ber story, and so had tried to part us. She took my note from Amelia In the morn ing and kept It for that reason. My farling did not know I was In tbe boat j until Aunt Betsy came In from the gar den and told her. But I have never told my wife n word. It Isn't wise to tell your wife all the little peccadilloes of yonr friends and relatives. St Paul's. Three Gentlemen from Illinois. The difficulties under which business la transacted In the House of Repre sentatives at Washington are bappily- or unhappily illustrated by an anec itotP nrinted in the Washington Times. The speaker of tbe House la commonly supposed to have too much power, min er than too little, but even ins nanus are sometimes tied up In red tape. The difficulty of securing recognition for the attempted passage of any bill cannot be exaggerated, ana air. uur- reU of Illinois had realized tnis ract to the full while trying to secure action en a little private bill which be had In tow for one of his constituents. tt hd been to see tbe speaker a nnmhor nf times beseeching him to let the bill come np, and finally Mr. Beed yielded, and told him to be on time tne next morning, with hla bill In bis hand, standing ready to catch the speaker's eye. Xfr Rnrrell seeded na urainx to be on hand, and at the first opportunity he waved the bill In tbe air. Tne apeaxer had not forgotten his promise, and when a suitable opening came, he said: "Tbe gentleman from Illinois is rec ognized." A page started frantically np the aisle, but seeing Mr. Connolly of Illi nois standing In his place, holding a hill in hut hand, the Daxe rushed up to him, took the Dill and hurried It to the desk. Tbe speaker did not reiian tta arrnr hut made the best of a bad matter, and the measure waa allowed to nui. Mr Rami then looked over In the di rection of Mr. Burrell, an.i again said: "The gentleman from Illinois." Another page started to follow the di rection of the speaker's eye, but ran into Mr. Graff, also of Illinois, who had been haunting the first seat of the mid file aisle for more than a month, wait ing to bring up a biU, and thla waa tatron tn the desk and read. The apeaker looked annoyed, but per sisted in his original Intention of see ing that Mr. Burrell was given a chance to slip his bill through, and for the third time sa.d: "The gentleman from Illinois." This time tbe page found his way to the proper person, and Mr. Burrell's bill was passed; but several members smiled as they reflected on the fact that two bills had received unexpected at tention on the strength of the recogni tion promised Mr Burrell. Oom Paul Oonld PHI tt. Here Is another characteristic story about the president of tbe Transvaal. In the days when Johannesburg was merely Farreira's mining camp, Krue ger was one day riding over the Wit watersrand In ordinary burgher attire. He off-saddled near a wagon owned by a German. The Teuton did not rec ognize the president, and held forth on the many things he would do were he ruler of the state. Suddenly Oom Paul, to the great astonishment of the German, who was a very small man. took off his coat, and, holding It out toward the stranger, said: "Put this on." "But," replied the latter, "It's too big." "Just so," replied his honor, with a grim emile "I'm l'aol Krueger, and it is not too big for me." God has never been concerned about tha size of the church, bnt he has al- OCR BOYS AND GIELS THIS IS THEIR DEPARTMENT OF THE PAPER. Qnalnt Sarins and Cat Dotna ef the Little Folks ETcrywhere Gathered aad Printed Hera far All Other Ur tie Oace to Bead. The Popnv tend United Sisrsssj The first train leaves at 6 p. m. For the land where the poppy blews; The mother dear is the engineer. And the passenger langhs and crews. The palace ear la the mother's 'arsis; The whistle, a low, sweet strain; The passenger winks and nods and blinks, And goes to aleep la the train! At 8 p. m. the next train starts Far the Poppy Land afar. The summons clear falls on the ear "All aboard for the aleeping earl" Bat what Is the fare te Poppy Land! I hope it is not too dear. The fare ia this, a hug aad a kiss. And it is paid to the engineerl 80 I ask of Him who children took On his knee in kindness great. Take charge, I pray, ef the trains seek day That leave at six and eight. "Keep watch ef the passengers, thus I pray. For to me they are very dear. And special ward, O graciona Lord, O'er the gentle engineer." -Edgar Wade Abbot. No Larger than a Tax. The little daughter of Israel Hnnten, farmer of Orange County, Ohio,, has one of the queerest pets ever aeea 'S 2-year-old horse that measures only thirteen Inches high. This strange midget pony la regarded by many as one of the most remarkably interesting bits of horse flesh In the land; certainly the tiny horse Is the smallest equine on earth. Dot, as the midget Is called, has a re markable history, for, unlike other dwarfs of her race, ahe Is the offspring of an ancestry of ordinary, every -day horses. Both ber father and mother were horses of tbe usual size and ap pearance, and so far as Is known there Is no reason for Dot's extremely small stature. When born Dot was not much larget than a kitten, and had to be fed by her owner from the beginning. Great care wa3 given the tiny colt In the effort to raise ber, and now she Is full grown, almost perfectly formed and vigorous in health, but only as big as a full grown Newfoundland dog. Offers of large sums have been made Mr. Hunton by museum and circus managers for Dot, who Is, of course, much wanted for exhibition purposes. These have all been refused, because Mr. Flunton's daughter Is so much at tached to the family pet that he baa not been able to secure her consent. Being wealthy himself, it Is probable that those who wish to aee the tiniest horse on the globe will have to aee It on the farm of Its owner. A Boy's Com position. In a public school in New England the teacher thought she would give out nat ural history subjects as subjects for compositions. In thla way ahe teaches them English orthography and natural history all at once. The commonplace subject "Ants" waa given to a bright boy who safd be knew all about It Thla la the result of his efforts: "Ants" There la many kinds of Ant My ant Mary Jane la one of these kind. She la genlly good natured and when she comes to see My Mother she brings me five cents worth of penute and tells me Why James how you've g rowed bnt when I go and see her and dont only just wawlk on the Oarplt without Oleenlng my boots she Is orfly mad. Ants like to give you Advice and scold at you like everything bnt their Hart Is in the Wright Plaice and once I found a Anteh nest In the woods I poked It with a atlck and a Million Ants run out after me and Crawled np Inside my Pants and Bit me like Sixty. Ante nests are good Things not to Poke with a stick Ants are very Indus- tryous In Steeling Shugar. I forgot to say that my Ant Martha lives in Main she has a boy of Just about my Alge and He can stand en his Hed Five mlnlts and how Do yon sup pose he can Do It. I Do not think of Anything mere about Ants at present Art of Maklns; Stlhomettea. Even In these enlightened days, when the art of photography baa ad vanced so very near to perfection. there are still some old-fashioned peo ple who cling with fondness to these silhouettes. One great thing In their favor is that the least clever among us may, with a little patience and a steady hand, find In them a pleasing recreation and soon become adroit u their execution. But there may be some of our young readers who scarce ly knew what a silhouette is, and such unenlightened persons we will en deavor briefly to Instruct la the al most forgotten art A few sheets of drawing paper, a pencil and a lamp pre all the essentials needed te com mence operations. The operator first fixes a sheet of paper to the wall by Inserting a pin In each corner. Then the person whose likeness, or "silhouette," la to be taken. la seated In a chair close to the wall In such a position as to throw a dis tinct shadow of his profile (as near life size as possible) on the center of the paper. To secure steadiness a wins glass or some suck support Is placed between his head aad the wall, for the slightest movement often causes fail ure. Having arranged these matters satisfactorily, the operator proceeds te sketch with a pencil tbe head and pro file of the "sitter," and thla requires a steady hand and some dispatch, as It Is ao easy matter to alt in an position for a great length of rim perfectly mo tion! esa. Whan the sketch la conclnd ed llttl skill will be needed to brine the task te aa end. The operator has CARRIES IT IN HCB ABHS. only with a sharp an knife to cat ont Feed the oerres on pure btooj Serves snd they will be your faithful serrants and not tyrannies! iastr : yon will not be uerrou. bat Krone-, cheerful aad nappy. Thousand of tired, ur. Touswoauoand oarewora mea bars found health aad renewed happiness In Hood's Sap. sanarilla, which makes Pure Rich Blood Tbs blood carries nourishment to every onran of the body and upon the quality of tbat nourishment depends the health of tbe ays tea. When the blood Is Impure nervousness, rhmisMttea, scrofula and ether troubles make their appearance. I bare taken Hood's Sarsaparllla at times for tbe past four years, I have been troubled wltb a tired sinking feeling, and waa not able to get rid of it, until I began taking this nsedl elne. I feel like another person since I began Its use." A. J. WarrcssAOK, far Hills, H. J. Sarsaparilla Is the best in fact the One Trne Bl- od Porter. HoOfJ'S Pi I Id artneonlfpllls to take 1 wu a I" II IS with Hood' Sarsaparllia. 4 1014. The" center part Is then thrown aside and the other paper laid on a piece of black cloth, which throws out the fea tures boldly, ana If sufficient care baa been taken a striking likeness will be the reward. Happy Momenta. IOYCLE-PATH3. As Ordinarily Hade They De Mot Coat much Honey. As commonly made, cycle-paths are net expensive, and, the cost being gen erally contrlbated by the wheelmen themselves, no tax for this purpose la placed upon the public at large. Whether thla abould be so is a question tliat will stand some discussion; but thus far the cyclists have sought only to Impose a a mall assessment noon ac tual users of the wheel when money has been needed to construct cycle-paths. Two years ago Mr. Charles T. Ray mond, of Lockport. New York, one of the pioneers In cycle-path construction, declared that "what la used by all, and needed by alL should be paid for by all," and this rule has commanded ap proval among wheelmen who navf taken up tbe work of cycle-path mak ing. Under flavoring conditions, cycle- paths cost from seventy-five to one hundred and fifty dollars per mile, tm surface width of the path should not be less than four feet, and need not be more than seven feet, except In rare cases. Tbe paths are generally laid out on the grass-grown roadside, parallel with the wagonway. Tbe grass Is first cut close to tbe ground, after which the material (soft coal, cinders, or screened gravel) la put on In a thin layer, and so ebaped and packed as to elope down- nard from tbe center to each side. The grade In most cases follows tloeely the original surface of the ground. Material may generally do had at lower cost, and named at tees expense during the winter months; and this Is an Important point to bear In mind, since the item of haulage alone U likely to constitute more than half the expense of construction. Century. Mgnallns; at Sea. There Is a great diversity of opinion In the British navy aa to the merits and demerits of colored lights for sig naling. Most of the young officers are strongly In their favor. As they point out, a signal on this system can be kept showing as long as required, while any amount of repetition of fiasb-slgnaiing may not under some conditions, ren der it Intelligible with any degree of certainty. The British naval authorities whe have been Indefatigable In testing new systems ef signaling, both for day and aight purposes, have recently made a trial at Portsmouth of the Sellner sys tem. Invented by an officer In the Aus trian aavy. This system consists of two lanterns, each capable of produc ing five classes of light namely, whit and red. whit occulting, red occul ting. Thirty different oomblnatloBS are placed on the code. Electric lights are used for tb lanUrns, aad though. for the present separate batteries ar ased for tbe lights and for tbe signal ing apparatus by which th lights are changed and obscured at will. It Is Intended that eventually ens dyname shall supply all of tha current required. A record of signals sent by tb appa ratus Is obtained by an attaobment which printa th mesaage seat auto matically. No difficulty was experi enced la reading tbe signals at a dis tance ef six miles or more. Tbe ob jection raised to th ay stem la tbat the mechanism is rar too ducat ana complicated, though th rasnlta ob tained with it rar exceed, tnos pos sible with th present Morse flash sir- nalmg. Philadelphia Press. Oo-OperatlVe Job. Ta, w preserved a lot of fruit last summer," said Mr. Wlckwlre to th visitor. "Wr said Mrs, Wlckwlre In sur prise. "I did avery bit of tb work my self." Tea, yon cooked and canned th fruit my dear, but you must not forget tbat I bad to pnt np tb sugar.' dlanapolls Journal. Mot In Any Cue. He (angrily) Do yon take m for a foolT She No; I wouldn't take yon nnder any circumstances. Hudson (N. Y.) Register. Consolation. "Why, what's np, Chollyr "Toothache, confound ltl I'm going to have 'em all out If thla keep on I'll be dead soon and It wont mat ter " "Oh, yea. It would. Ton'd need 'em to gnash with." Life. In Chicago Miff Is thla divorce good for all other States? Lawyer All but one. Miff Which one is that and I'll keep out of It? Lawyer The married state. Bachelor's Logic. "Why don't you get married T said X. to a friend of hla. "Because, In the first place I detest woman on principle; secondly and chiefly, because marriage would Inter fere with my literary work." "What class of work?" "I am writing lov stories." Tit Bits. IIirt a hnw naaaaa thranrh Ufa with out bearing a kind word until some 1 1 ' si A TRUMPET CALLS. Kara t the uireauasinn rnnBB devu wastes DO OKll WmVV Faith m always the basis of Joy In religion. Get a man te think right and God win get bla to do right - God send bis witnesses where they are seeded the most Tbe mere we leva Ood, th more w will be willing te do for man. Tb devil always goes to tb wedding when people marry for money. God sees keroei where mea see only tbe convmenest kind of people. W may he able to rid f God's man, bat never of God's truth. vary dollar asm men get lacreaaes their ehance ef missing beavea. Whom sneao people bar aothla to say they seem to talk tbe most The aim ef many serine ns is too low for angels, and too high for mea. A man may wear religion ns a eleak. and yet frees bis soul to death. Man'a blindest ey is on the side where he thinks It will pay to siu. The real chosen people of God are those who know bis will and do It A doubt la the beavleat burden the devil can bind on a Christian's back. No man praya In earnest who does not expect to get Just what he asks. Obscurity on earth will not keep any body from becoming famous In heaven. I The man who walks with God most keep step with everytmng tnat is geoo. It Is doubtful if we can truly own anything for which we are not grate fuL The devil has not yet round out how to make the man poor who loves to give. The Lord's army was never defeated because the opposing army bad giants in It The first dart the devil alma at a young convert is always pointed with a doubt Tbe devil baa no dart In bis quiver that may not be quenched by the ahield of faith. Tbe more a mean man has to say In church, tbe more It hurts the cause of true religion. The man who would have tb power to move mountain must begin on grains of sand. Let a vote be taken to determln wbo Is the wisest man, and every fool will vote for himself. We know exactly what kind of a man Adam waa, when we become well ac quainted wltb ourselves. The devil Is often mad welcome la a home where there la a handsome Bible on tbe center table. Ever since Eve ate the apple, one of woman's greatest troubles has been about something to wear. There Is something wrong wltb a Christian's life. If It never makes a aln ner feel ashamed of himself. You Can' I liny Happiness, but If 70a ars nifhrtnir from drapepila, scrofula, salt tbeutn. lmpure blood, you may be cured and made happy by taking. Hood's Sar.-sparUla. Hood's Fills are the best lamlly cathartic, and llrer medicine. Harmlem, reliable, sure. The North magnetic pole ia now probably near the southeast angle of the Arctic peninsula known ai Boothia Felix; the south magnetic po'e is eouth of Australia, seventeen degrees, twenty-five minuter from the geo grapical pole. Jvse try a 10s. box of Csseareta. the floes fiver ana bowl regulator evsr made. The Rural New .Yoker printa letters seeming to show that the odor of sweet peaa is poisonous to common hoots flies. rr mint. it Miiti inraHMra Ttr t aaaa Thame ton's Kye witcr. Srorciita tell at sSo. per bottle A revolving state, worked by elec tricity, hat been placed in Drury Lane Theatre, London. tm 1 topped trea snd permanently eared. Mo t after first day's nas Of OB. EUKfl QaXAT laava Rxstoreb. Free S2 trial bottle and Ireau be. Send to Dr. KUne. Ml Arch St., Fails, fa. A flowering plant is said to abstract from the soil two hundred times its own weight in water. vere uuaraaieeu y . aaii ww Area I'Hll.A., PA. Kaaa st once: no opsra- uon Or delay IfUin malum, wpwiihww. Indorsement 01 physicians, ladies and promt nnt rttisaii. send lor circular: Omce bours A M. to li: tt. The laboratories, museums, insti tutes, etc., connected with the Univer sity of Berlin cost th stat f 590,000 a yoar. MM'a (Mr nrOoniomptton relieves tb most ODsoaste wusua. -k stock company has been formed In Springfield, Mass., to aaannfaotnre musical Instruments of aluminum. lira. WbukOWs Bootauig Byrae aw ehlldrea teetblnt. soltsns ttM (unu, reduce" tnOamms Uoa. allar peia. cure wind eoUe, Js a betua Tk. lata. tnlna in tha war at invention is the phonendascope, by meaus ui viuuu ju vaw J wins MKN and Ladies' in small towns wishing to earn 118 a week easily, write ur, we will ex plain. EXCBWIoa CBBHIOaa CO, Bocbsster, M. V. Lock Box 80S. A We All WOO Know. Drummer Whatever Induced you to put In tbat line of neckties? No man east of tbe Rocky mountains would wear such scarfs. Haberdasher Why, those are Just the kind women pica out ror preaents. Llfe. Ka-rer Got Bo Far. "Ton say that you have played Mac beth?" said a New Tork theatrical man ager to an applicant for a position, "I have acted the role of Maebetk fourteen times." "Well, let me hear you repeat bis do fiance of Macduff." "Oh, I never got so far as that Th audience always made me quit before I got to that part" Tevea Sifting. iLcmon Jnloe ta Us Bath. fad, borrowed, tt la aald, from West Indian bH, la a lsmoa bato, which is supposed to b a great banri fler aa well aa rfreabr. Tare or four lemons ar Sliced Into tbe water perhaps a half boar bfor It 1 used and It cosmetic aad tenia Tlrtuna at tbrbr ranch Increased. not Extended, girl" aald an Irate Uttle lestleaian f about four feet eleven taebea to a six-foot man, "I would have 70a know, air, tbat I have been well brought up." ToasibU, waa tbe answer, -bnt yo BS EASY I Use ight Soap Soap ia th World. It doe all th work; you Don't have to Rub or Scrub. Save yoar slothes woadsxfally- too. It's So Pare. atoohMilor Ignorance About Children. Bachelors who have lived long alone, r la hotels and clubs, acquire at range Ignorance about children. One of these was telling a friend how bl little nephew enjoyed "The Jungle Book." "How old ia he?" was asked. "Oh, I don't know. Seven or eight Maybe ten." "Then he can read stories by him self?" "Let me see. No, he can't He's too young. He baa the book read to him." "Then be must be leas than ten years old." Th uncle was puzzled. That's SO," he said reflectively. "My brother hasn't been married nearly so long as that I don't believe If s more than six years. No, tbe boy can't be over four or five. 1 think he's Just four." "Can't you tell his age by looking at him?" asked tbe friend. "Why, no," answered the uncle, hope lessly. "All children look the same ag to me except Infants and those that are about ready for college. It was another bachelor who was vis iting friends when a caller came wltb hla young son. The boy was four or live years old, and a manly little chap. The bachelor was attracted by his ap pearance, and, patting his cheek, aald to tbe father: "He's a sturdy boy, isn't he? He'll be ready to go out and play ball In a few years." "1 can play ball already!" exclaimed tbe child, proudly. "Why, be can talk, can't her exclaim ed the astonished bachelor. "I didn't know children could talk at his age." The company would have doubted tbe sincerity of his Ignorance bad he not been too evldent.y In ecrnest What Next? A man In London la making a lot of money by lending out a 1,000 pound Bank of England note for swell wed dings, to be exhibited as the gift of the bride's father. A man Is sent along to watch tbe note, and can be made very useful In exhibiting the presents. she Did tbe Work. DcKf,,i Bachelor Sav. didn't you JUOUAWS - ' find it pretty hard work to pop the question? Bold Benedict Not at all: you see. 1 married a wldow.-New Tork Mining Journal. Tbat Joyful Feeling With th exhilarating sense of renewed health and strength and internal cleanliness, which follows the use of Syrup of Figs, is unknown to the tow who hare not proressed beyonl the otd-ttme medicines and the cheap substi tutes senwOmes offered but never accepted by the waU-laformad. rhinam'i nw o,itv directory contains 1,762,000 names. This gives the lie to tbe 1890 census, or the compilers have been padding out the book for sffoct llvbo,,, A chemical dyeing-school for in struction and research ha been built at Crefeld under th auspices of the German Government at a cost of about $100,000. Psanssss Caaaot be Wnrea by local applications, as they cannot reach tha diseased portion of the ear. There la only one way to care deafness, and that Is by constitu tional re an art lea Deafness is caused by an in named coavdHlon of the mucous lining of tha Eastaehtan Tube. When this tube sets If. flamed yea hare a rombtins sound or imper feet hearing, and when it ia entirely closed Deafness is the result, and unless the Inflam mation ean be taken out and this tube re stored te lie aorta al condition, hearing will be destroyed fererer. Nine cases out of tea are cam il br catarrh, which is nothing bnt an in flamed condition of the mucous surfaces. We will sire One Hundred Dollars for any caae of Deafoessjeeused by catarrh) that cau not be cured by Halt' Catarrh Cure, bend for circular, free. . r. 3. Oannrr A Co., Toledo, a fmd br Draff riff ta Tic HalT FasmUr FtUe are the Anti-toxins serum was used for the first time in a case of lockjaw the other day at Fordham Hospital, New York. The injections were given at intervals of twelve hours. The patient re covered. Taa't Tabaeee Spit aad oka Tane life If yon want to quit tobacco using easily and furerer. regain lost mannood, be made weU, strong, masnetio, full of new life and vteor, take Me-To-Bao. the wonder-worker that snakes weak men strong. Many gain ten pounds la ten days. Orer 400.000 cared. Bay fto-To-Bao from your own druggist. Under absolute guarantee to cure. Book and sample avwar. fraa. Adareas Sterling nomanr vah, vuuBago or Kw Yotk. The London hospitals treat about 87,000 in-patients and about 1,299,000 out-patients every year. This does not include the large number of out patients who are treated in the free dispensaries. 3 rVrri JOR one IA iLai a V'QSjl olate. 3 Increases every year. Try it and you g g will see why Walter BaLtr 'Well Done Outlives Death.' Even Your Memory Will Ghine if You Use APOLIO "What do you moan," said tbs suav mer hotel man, "by publishing In 70W aewspaper the statement that ass serpent was seen near my plac?" ; "I doa't see anything to get angry about" was the reply. "I thought It would be a splendid advertisement for 7 "An advertisement! Nothing of the kind! Quite the contrary. Our strong Doint Is tbat we keep strictly ta parat resort"-Washlngtoa Star. Cease for Basra. -What Is that fellow raving so for?" eaked tbe tourist , "Missed tbe midnight train last night xplained Rubberneck B11L "WeUt well! I have seen men swear and cavort for five minute or so eve missing a train, but he Is tbe first 1 ever knew to be at It tea hours after tbe train had gene." "He has mighty good reason, mj friend. They was more'n gon.OOO fee bullion. on tbat thar Tory train." lay dlanapolta Journal. - -1 Ten seldom bear of a man swearing off nowadaysr the topers seem to b waiting for th law to save them Wans bilious or cord re, sat Casearel candy cathartic, care guaranteed, loc, stc There are about 100 grains of irta. in the average human body, and yet so important is this exceedingly small quantity tbat its diminution ia atten ded with very serious results. The physiologists say that the sight side of the brain is of more importano to organic life than tbe left fit. VitnV Danre. One bottle Dr. Km. Specific cures. Circular, r redonla. N. Y. It ia to live twioe when we enjoy th recollections of our former life. BRAVE SPIRITS BROKEN. Bow often women wake up In. the morning cheerful and happy, deter mined to do so much before tb da ends, and yet: Before the morn ing is very old, the dreadful BACK ACHE appears, the brave spirit sinks back in affright; no matter how bard she strug-1 gles, the "clutch" is upon her, she falls upon the couch, cry ing:" Why should I suf fer so? What can I do?" Lydla E. Flnkham's "Vegetable Compound " will stop the torture and restore courage, v" All such pains come from a deranged uterus. Trouble in the womb blots out the light of the sun at midday to a vast number of women. Be advised do as many others have done and are doing' procure Lydla E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound at once, and commence without delay to realize the relief it is sure to bring yoav olADWAY'S PILLS AlwaysReliabIe,PurelyVefetable Perfectly tcsteless, elegantly coated, purge, regulate, iiunfv, cleanseand strengthen. KsO U AY'S FILLS for the cure of all disorders of tbe Stomach, Bowels. Kidneys. Bladder, Msrvoas Diseases, Dlzzinea. Vertigo. Coetlreneas, Miss, Sick Headache Female Complaints Biliousness, Indigestion Dyspepsia Constipation AND All Disorders of the Liver Observe tbe following symp-oms, rajoltlag from dlteves of ibe digestive organs: OOMtlpa tion. Inward piles, lullnea of blood ia Ui Bead acldltr of the stomach, nausea, heartburn, dkv gust of food, fullness of welrbt ol the STneaana, sour eructations, sinking or flattering of Me heart, choking or suffocating sensation when la s lying posture, dimness of vision, dots or webs before the sight, fever and dull pain in the head, deficiency of perspiration, ysllownessof tha akla snd eves, pain la the side, chest, llmtn, end sud den flashes of beat, burning In the flash. A few dose of HAD WAY'S PILLS will rreethe system ot all of the above-named disorders. Price S cla. a box. Bold by droMtrsi seal by mail. Send to DR. KsD AT A CO., lock Do tSS, New York, for book ot Advice. ONE Omir CTltTJrrernWaOtBi4 fft9A1,A worm or aruung imw,v m w w bo In (lard be BOUGHT A MACHIKE Till WOULD DO THE WORK iX'ZSSX'tfiSt rtrilllag maealaerr, and that Is the ate CMsasjs IMmr. LOOM 18 Ac It YMABT, Ttsja, Okisw nBIIIAlsnd whisev itablu cured. Book seal UrlU'vl free. Dr. B. M VlooLLit.AHatA.Oa n a CUT tosaU JLettaeeUreaBi aad Ijsetsien JIVCII I Creaat Mean to consnsMr. Mck M seller. UsssatcomsMsio;. adBM.IsjtaaiBa for samp!. LimiciCsmiCo.lU KhA,veW.. aa is assises' aa FOR FIFTY YEAR9I MRS. WINSLOWS SOOTHING SYRUP bats been namA br MIlflaM mt Mi for their Osilirro while Thlng fof over fixer 1 et-Tj. 11 aoomee tne cnua. aajiJsni gums, all ays all pain, cart wind ceuV ' Is the bht remedy for dlaurofjaa. 1 Twenty-i. Cnt m MttftV CUIUS WHtHE lit tisf (III 5- yuugn syrup. Tastes Oooa. vm in nme. woia by arutstat. hundred and fifteen TTr.t.. Tf O- 'ATA. TM iaWaL- bfZZ Dsel U J4H have made Cocoa and Choc- and the demand for 'it r !? & CoLt(L- Dorchester. Miu. iCsr ' ' ' I ways been particular a boa. who should ateksasl tm tk JbM f fadahMsma. woman starts out to artr Ma for hare ana bean braJM ay m
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers