111181 'iM J$;- egiifcii.
B. F. BOHWEIER,
THE OON8TITUTION-THE UNION AND THE ENFORCEMENT OF THE LAWS
MIFFLINTOWN. JUNIATA COUNTY. PENNA.. WEDNESDAY. JANUARY 9, 1895.
NO. 4.
VOL. XLVJX
VII TTEIt V.- Contlnnert.
Cranny perceived that something
wus wron directly they emerfred int;
the liirht, for the lamps wore all lit in
the dininr-room. anil revealed tia
bonny brow black us nijjdit. R'uJ the
rosebud mouth unmistakably drawn
coven at the rornors n I Tor the life
of her the kind iU ia.ly could not
th:nk what was at the bottom ot it: but
presently she o' served wi:h relieithat
there was an effort to throw otT the
cloud and when a: lenuth. though not
for awhile, in i es m-e to M:ne mer. v
Story told ae; os the taUo lor her
espoeial henetit. Jerry s own boll-line
lauyh rang-out aain. hirli and clear
and sweet as a young bird s, she was so
rejoiced to heaV it that she foryot to
note that the transformation wai
neither duo to any e:;orts of her own
nor of her grandson.
To Cecil, indeed, Jerry was aL'
shoulder.
She had no eyes nr ears for him
until after tliatlaurh had brought her
out of her mood: and Uel'.cu.len him
self ould not but h:n e been conscioui
of the blainjr rauianco of tlio eyes
which so continuously sought his. and
of the r ready response to every ap
proach he made.
"l!v Jove, she will b? a leauty one
of those davsl ' he told hi rose 1. "fly
love, .Master Hayinond. vo l 1ml bet
ter well lor ward in tho lie'.d be ore
more of the pacic opencrv! The little
heiress will be a prize worth the run
rrng for. Had I been a dozen years
younger but, however, I am not a
marrying man. or I should have been
done for long ago. Luckily I don't
need to go heiress hunting, neither."
And so it was he merely felt please J
and a little touched by the sparkling
young face opposite, pleased to tint
.himself still capable of attiching. and
touched by the artlessne.-s with which
the attraction was confessed. "A dear
little thing." ho owned in tho end:
"and upon my word. 1 said no more
than the truth, when 1 told her 1
wished X had, just such another little
si-ter.'
They had a merry evening- aftej
that.
Tho billiard-table was so atrociously
bad that Capt. lieilenden, who was a
noted player, found it humorous in the
extreme never to huve the ghost of an
i iea where his ball would go. nor what
would be the effect of his Cne-t strokes,
lie mared with govd-humored laugh
ter when his simplest cannons miised,
and when jiocku's that should have
been certainties .iltcd him in tho most
barefaced manner. His mirth was so
spontaneous and infectious that no ono
i o lid resist it: and without knowing id
tne least why. granny and granddaugh
ter laughed almost as much and as
heartily as he: while Cecil, who would
ha. e foit aggrieved and discomfitted
hud anv one else made such fun of the
whole, consoled his dignity with th
rejection that Belienden had never
been used to any D.it tho most unex
ceptionable of billiard-tables, and that
lie must therefore to considered as
highly indulgent in that ho conde
scended to handle a cue at all upon thi?
occasion.
"Hut why should wo havo it all to
ourse'.ves'r" suggested the gay guards
man at la t. "i'ray, Mrs. ta upbcll,
in us. You have been so good in
coming here, and I know my litt'e
friend," with a glanee at Jerry, "is
iwnging for a game. What shall it be?
Tool? Or, let me see. I know the thing
she would like. Buttle, that's iff Did
you ever plav battle, .lerry" Com- and
play with me. then. Hug your grand
mamma to take a hand, and we 6ha!l
be two to two.."
tbeXi plrrps U was'iVme j
compassion to the eager little fa .-e so
I'erhaDS he was beginning to tiro or
stfn 1 o lowinir I S pro'M-ess, luat
thi suggestion was ma le: but, at any
rate, it was received with rapture.
"1 cun plav battle. I can indeed," al
most shrieked the little girl in her ex
citement. "I have played it at Uncle
Kavmond's: we played it the very last
time I was there: and Kthel, and Alica,
an I I all played: didn't we Cecil?
Don't you remember, Cecil?" Cecil's
misdemeanor was by tlrs time forgot
ten. "Oh. granny, do say Yes.' Ptp-
eeded tho small speaker, dancing in
f out of the smiling and indulgent
u itinv. "Do get oi.t of your chair,
.'ad come, thwre's a dear granny; and
if you don't know the game, we can
all t'-ach vou," and then as granny
obediently rose. o:f bustled Ceraldinu
to the stand, took down tho cues, and
examined their tips the half of theso
were oil selected a very narrow ono
for herself, and a very broad one for
granny, by way of granny's being the
novice, and finally stood by Bellcnden's
side, the picture of happiness and
prido.
All of this was diverting to people
willing to be diverted, and benevolent;
and then, behold! what should appear
but that granny, who knew nothing
about tho requirements of billiard
rooms and tables, could neverthe'ess
handle her cue. and hit a ball on the
desired side, and not bo overco r.e wit h
astonishment when it went the way it
should go! Sho w;is in fact a far su
perior performer to the prancing
Jerrv, and tho latter would have been
mortilled, S3 well as amazed, by the
prowries of so unexpected a rival, bad
granny's profieney not placed it be
yond a doubt that "for tho remainder of
the evening the old lady must stick to
Cecil for a partner, leaving the moro
accomplished liellenden for herself.
Do what she would Jerry could no
aring back her ba'U.
Her instructor was good-nature it
self; and ho cheered and consoled, and
with infinite skill repaired the damage
done their side as fast as she could in
flict it; but nevertheless they lost
oftener than they won, and she re
solved to practice in secret, and nevej
rui .itio risk of doing herself such
Srei'jit in his eves again.
Things brightened afresh, Lowever.
thereafter.
Cipt. liellenden performed feats
ieats which, it is true, did not invari
ably come off as they were intended,
and which none but an expert would
have ven'ured upon at all; but he
showed how he could have done this
and that, and Cecil vouched for the
fact that he had actually seen the com
plication worked, so that it was a'most
is good as beholding for themselves':
ferry's bedtime had long gone byj
I
; t s frji i I'll vix irvjxm-rr
out it was not in fond gianucame'l
heart to put an en i to her da: 1 ng's
pleasure. Sho so seldom either
wished or cared to sit up Into, and it
was so evidently a delight on this one
rare occasion, that, "It cannot barm
her for once and away," thought the
old lady.
Alack.! Granny did not take into con
liberation that there are two kinds oi
barm. As to tbat to. which she ol
luuuu. she was, pernaps, right' on I
about the other, Jerry, j rotty rr,tlin,
why weru yo'j not sleeping souudl in
your litt'e bed hours ago, dreaming ol
brawling brook, and leaping trout, or
of wild wet gallops along the se ma .
rather thaii wnt hinir with eves al
in a tingle, toe erylhiug th s too de
liRhtful stranger aid and said?
Ho lo.t the next day.
It rained, us foretold, and he was
ressed to rema n, but cid no! do so.
I ersonally he would g adly enough
have s-tayed in such good quarters, and
Bent over the note to Kincraig which
young 1- avraond urged him to write:
but he did not feel that the thingcou'd
be done. That sort of freedom with a
house to which he had only been re-,
ceived under stress of adverse circum- j
stances be was not the n an .to take.
and with a firmness which Mrs. Cam)
bell in her heart applauded, and which
even Cecil felt to be correct and gen
tlemanly, he adhered to his resolution.
Would he then return Would be
pay them a real visit? Shoot theii
moor? And in particular have some
sea-fishing on the bank below th
house, to the description of which he
had listened with so much apprecia
tion? The fishing was going on nightly
it present.
Cranny spoke: but Jerry looked
thousand urgencies, ana her s.len'.-c
was even more effectual than the
other's pleadings, liellenden really
hardiy knew bow to manage it, for hU
time was already manned out for the
autumn but somehow he could not re
sist. In his heart he thought ho knew
whom he could throw over, and from
whence he could scrimp a few days.
His doubtful brow cleared, and he
gave the roraise required. They were
really too kind, and the inducements
altogether were really too tempting
he would certainly come, and wouic
write from Kin raig.
in a few davs tho letter came.
It was all that Cecil, but perhaps not
quite all that Jerry had hoped for.
she, oor child, bal been feverishly
e"i ect- nt as every post came in. and
man.- a boat had sho watched crossing
tho loch, unknown to all beside. She
had tai.o.o I ho might come at any
time, and the days had seemed lone
and pretitlo s though hope had started
ufresli with each returning morn.
In reality, liellenden wrote quite
wonderfully soon for him. He had t
very pleasant recollection of a charm
ing" little adventure, t nd was quite
willing to follow it up and sae more o:
his new friends- but long days on the
moor are not conducive to letter-writing,
and he did not quite know what tc
say or to fix.
At last, however, ho could make s
definite pro; osal. and it was one which
as we have said. Cecil found agreeable
enough. He did not primarily o:!ei
his own return to Inchmarew, but ic
the name of his host, he requested
young ICaymond's company at K'ncraig.
where there was a bachelor party as
sembled, and just one room vacant
I a.mond was asked to come and
Q11' it.
The post scrip, however, was of morf
im ortanco to one tloleful listener.
"If yo i can come, and if Mrs. Camp
bell w" 11 permit mo, I will do roy.-ell
the pleasure of accompanying you
ba--k to Inchmarew on your return.
nu will spend two nights with you.'
So it ran.
' Only two nights!" exclaimed poor
Jerry, in such heartrending accent!
-.hat both her auditors laughed.
' He would be flattered if he coulc
hear you. my little coz," cried Cecil
gaily, "for he was in spirits to be gay.
"it would not do to tell hiin. or hit
he:id might be turned. Hut I think 1
had letter go." he added, turning tc
his grandmother. "I think it would
hardly be civil to refuse, and I should
h ive had to shoot some time or othe)
at Kincraig anyway."
"And Archie Kincraig will have to
shoot here." rejoined Mrs. Campbell,
well versed in moor etiquette. "Hac"
V-not better bring him ba,k w
i so, cecn.
ith yoi
Oh, no," cried Jerry, interposing
with a frown. "Oh, no, granny. Oh
how can you say so?"
"Why not.'" Granny looked, as shi
felt, surprised, for, as a rule, the sale
Archie was rather a favorite w th hei
young arand-daughter thai otherwise
and was one of the few whose welcome
at Inchiuojrew wao alwava assured.
"Oh, we don'-t want him," Jerry salt
now, however. "He will only be ii
the wax. Let him come at anottio,
time later on, when there is nobodj
else. We don't want so many at on
ime, do we Cecil.'"
"He could not leave his own men i.
we did." said Cecil. "Y ou see, l'e
lenden says there is a party" - his own
eyes brightening at the word, for at
his age to be invited to make one of a
party of bachelors is a distinct on, and
he remembered the Ascot week, and
thought on what a much higher level
ho should stand now than he had done
then "nc doubt the party will bo kepi
up by relays ali through the next few
weeks," ho continued. "I am only sur
prised that he allows Belienden U
leave to soon, for he is not likely V
have many such crack shots."
He did not know that tho espocia
crack shot referred to was not over anc
alMive well pleased either wi h hi
moor, or bis company, liellenden hac
rellected that in all probability the
shooting retained by tho Campbell
was much better than that let to hi
host; that the peo;do- got together iu
the shooting-box were a so-so scratch
iot, not to his taste; and moroover, that
tho cookery was tasteless, and his bA.I
room small and stuffy so that the
recollection of his evening at the old
castlo on tho other side of tho loch had
grown pieasanter day by day in con
trast to his present surroundings.
To shoot with Cecil Haymond. who.
If ho were but a bov and priggish boy,
was 6till a gentle r:an and a nice sort
of fellow whereas tho fellows as
sembled at Kincraiv were, as a rule, of
another sort to d'ne with the dear
old lady, who had made herself quite
charming to him, and with whom he
bad plenty of topi s in common, for she
was by no means as completely out of
the wtirld he moved in, for all the ro
c!u;e life she was leading now, as were
the youths at Kincraig; and to frolic
with the pretty, apt. responsive little
heiress, tue joliy little mischievous
sprite who was unmistakably his chief
friend ol all, would, Captain Belien
den felt, suit him much better than
this forced intercourse with a second
rate set of rather rowdy bachelors.
Accordingly he made his host as he
well knew how to do invite young
Itaymond, and had added to the invi
tation, his own postscript.
All went well.
Cecil certainly shone by coutiastat
the shooting lodge. He might not ap
pear to advantage when contrasted with
Belienden, and with Belienden only;
but he was several cuts above Archie
Kincraig's friends, and this be coulf
not help perceiving.
Belienden owned that the comranj
was not to his mind Cecil turned vp
his nose at it still more. Belienden
whispered that the sport was bad
Cecil" called it abominable. Bel'enden
Suggested that they should be otf on
the day but one lollowing Cecil dis
patched a messenger to stop the early
boat, in order that they might start
the hist thing after breakfast. When
the two arrived at Inchmarew they IiaJ
advanced in intimacy by seven-league
vtrides.
On this occasion Jerry was not nearlj
40 demonstrative as she had been i
fore. She had bad time to think, ana
to bo shy of h'ir own thoughts. She,
too, had been growing fast within the
last two or three davs, growing even
since Cecil's departure, growing in a
strange new Knowledge wmcti naa to
be kept a'l to herself. She was goinjj
now to be careful, and cot to run the
risk of Cecil's teasing and granny'r
smiles any more.
She was already dressed ard wait
iug, however, when the dog-cart drovo
up to the door, and had a pretty bunch
of l owers at her throat: and as she
come somewhat sober iy forward to do
her part of welcome, Cecil thought ho
had never beheld his joung cousin to
greater advantage.
Perhaps liellenden was not quite o:
the same opinion. I'erhaps he would
have preferred a step and carriage less
sedate, a countenance less composed.
Certain it Is that ho experienced a
momentary check, a feeling of surprise
and doubt, and that his own manner
shadowed this forth ou the instant.
But presently he saw through it on'j
too well. It was but a passing woman
liness, an evanescent emotion of tl.e
bashful kind, and it soon, too soon. gave
way. Ere half an hour had e lapsed,
the two were chattering aim baudying
jest and repartee as freely together as
they had ever done, uni he was no more
on his guard.
At dinner-time, or rather at dress
ing-time, he found flowers in hir
room.
So did Cecil; for Jerry, with this
new-born touch of modesty about her,
would make no injunctions: but her
cousin uid not know that his were of
loo baser, Bellendon's of the choicer
sort. Ho (arte down with a rose-bud
in his b.tton-hole. liellenden had
selected a spray of purple heliotrope,
and was whispering to the fair giver
jjinething which boro evident refer
ence to tho same, when they were not
less scarlet than tho scarlet blossome
on her breast as she hung her head tc
listen, and Cecil might Lave been - bu
Cecil saw nothing.
When the young man l.ad formed,
his ideae on any kivcu subject, it re
quired an agency little short of super
natural to uproot them, and his calm
conviction of Geraldinc's extreme
youth and devotion to hiu.self carried
him through all evidence of a contrary
nature.
Jerry was a uico little girl. By-and-by
he should perhaps marry her. That
was the sum total of his thoughts.
As for there being anything betweer
the magnificent liellenden and the
.i t tie. wild, unformed Highland lassie,
.ho very idea would have been absurd
ind pre(osterous in his eye -at thi
iiuie. at least.
He therefore had no hesitation alou
walking straight up the room, and, as
wo have said, neither saw nor heard
anything.
' Have you said 'Thunk yea" for you
pretty ho',uet.''' injured Vel.cnden.
Witii iiii air ol liavinif cono so himse f.
".vnil cau you ii..ei j:-et tlio hidden
lan0aae of flowers, h'aymond? 1J
:auo unless i'ou can, you aro. not
vorthv to receive them, and so 1 have
Oecn Jiyir.g to jo::r cousin."
bo fiat was what he hail been say
'ng. l ook at hiiu. aad at Ccraldine, and
at tlio piece of fragrant heliotrope,
whose amorous significance young
Cecil a'l at once called to mind, it did
j st occur to the latter, unsuspicious as
he had been half a minute before,
that jerha)s. all things c' lisiJe: ed. it
might havo been well to have lelt the
vords unsaid.
(to i:k i jn" i':N"ui:.j
A ' l:ursrlar.
Iiurg a Your money or your life.
Inventor I b:ive nothing in tho
Arurul but m great invention which
just coinp'rtPi! to d.iy. Take that.
R'.irgWr rctir t g I dnn't want it
I'm out for djr dust not trouble.
i . j
Mr. Wabash Do you consider mar
riage a failure? Mrs. Lakefront
Not altogether. My experience has
been alioufc three bull's-eyes in (Ire.
Town Topics.
A Tnlsar Fallow.
Cholly I am coing to cut that
fellah Hardhead; he's to vu'gah. He
smokes a pipe. Miss Finkie 1 havoj
heard that that is the height of style
It's Engl'sh, you know! Cboily
Ya-as; but Hardhead says he docsn'6
raoko a ipe liecaue it's Knglbli, but
because it's chcat: I'u' k.
Ilel I Up His Leg fo he Sworn.
Ia Sa'ittish courts of law vita'K?.'
repeat tho oath with ths right h i:i 1
raisod. On one occasion, ho wever, th
niistrate found a diilieulty. .lol I
j your right arm," ho deiuamlel. "f
jann.i dae't," said tli3 witness. "'.Tar
iot?" "(iot shot in that aim."
"Then hold np your left." "Ouuini
lae that, ayther got shot in tho itlier
uie, tae." "Then hold np vo ir leV
fjpondel the irata migistrate; 'i
man can be sworn in this court with
out holding np something. " Ar0-o-'t.
, .
At Wh'.to ll.-nt.
am so worried about my
She T
aunt: she is at
the ooint of death
He Is that your wealth.- aunt? Mr,
Yes. He Well, never mind, dear,
est You have my love, which la
greater than ever. Life.
Truthful Jol-.nny.
Mother AA hy. Johnny, how is
this? It is past 7 o'clock. 1 told
you to come in when t he street lamps
were lighted. Johnny Well, mam
ma, they are lighter!. Indira
According to a French journal a
Swiss firm is manufacturing phonogra
phic clock which talk the hour instead
of striking it.
A new garbage crematory has just
been successfully tested ia Chicago in
the presence of some Xew York experts
and the Mayor of Chicago.
It is said the flesh on the forojnar
ters ot the beaver resembles that o
land animals, while that on the hindf
quarters has a fishy taste.
REV. DH TALMAQE.
TUB BROOKIiTK DIVTXE'S SUN
DAY SERMON.
Subject : "The Fire Worshipers."
Text s "Thor ivite h-Ui m-rt from tas
Enst to Jerusalem.' M itthow li., 1.
I TbP wisn mm Tr th Peruses or V
po-o.illi1 flrn worMir. nil I found thplr
Idesoendnnt In In IK lnsf OWo'wr. Thnlr
Jenthonlmn Is mort to'prsble than nnr o'thi
other tti9 rolb.-lons nn hn morn allfvm
tlont, nd while In thi' ronn 1 the world
rlM T hav, nlrwly shown you the worst
'nrm of lipathealsm to-day I shosv you the
lent offiansivi.
- The prophet of tho PnrwtR w.tt Zorotster,
ofPprstn. ll't w.i poAt nni philosopher m4
reformer n' wot I rp'l!?!onrst. HiS'ilopip'n
thrived nt first In Pirs!?i. but nnilnr Moham.
roMfln persomitlon thv retrntPd to Indii,
whore T mot them, anil in rt.blitton lo what I
faw of them nt their hi-iquirtor In Bom
bay, India. I had two wmIcs of a-woi-tatton
with ono of the mot lesrneil and enl:il of
tbelr people on hipbo.irJ from Botnbay to
Brinrtlat.
The Bible ol the rnrs-v9, or fir worjhli.
ors, as they aro Inas'nr.itely e.illed. Is thi
Zond-Avpsta, n eolloetton of the transit
books that overcame Into my hands. Thorn
were orlsfinnlly twinty-oai voln-nos, bat
Alexander the Great, In a drunien fit, sit
Are to a pilaea which contains t so-ni of
therrt, nn 1 they went Into aslics nn I fore.
fuln'. Hut there ar more of their sacred
volumes left than most pople won 1 1 hara
putleneo to rea l. There are mmvthln .n in
the religion o the T.irsa th-U wzgrM
Christianity, au l some of Its do'trlm ara
are in record with our owu rei'-'ia. Zo
roisler. who lived nhont 110(1 vesrs
before Christ, was a "- mm. snfferel
perswcntlon for fi's ' ii-i nu t wag assassin
ated whl'o wnrahlpin? at nn ntlnr. He an
nounced the theory, "Ho is best who is pure
of heart." and that there are two pre.nt
spirits In the world, Ormnz !. the Rood npirtr,
and Ahriman, tho la 1 sn'rit. nnd that all
who do right are rmler tho Influence of
Ormitrl, and all wiio do wrong are nn.
der Ahrlmao ; that the Parsee mnst be
bora on the ground flior of the house
nnl must be buried from the gronnd
floor; that tho !yin mm must have
prayers sal ! over him and a sacred juice
(riven him to drink; that the goo I at their
h'c;ns tru Into etern il light and the bad
Into eternal darkness; t'luf. having passed
out of this life, tho scul bluer near the
rorpse t'lree d:iys in a paradisaic state,(
enjoying more thin nil the nations ofi
earth put together eonM enjoy or in ni
pandomonlae state. s'ifTrin? morn than all,
the nations put together con!, I posslhlv.
u!Tor, but nt the en 1 ofthr.-o lavs departing
for Its final destiny, nn I tii it there will he a
resurrection o' the ho 1 Ta -y are more
careful than any ollur people about th dr,
ablutions, and thev w.is'i ardl wish and
wash. Thev pay prent attei tion to physical
health, nu t 1t Is a rare thing to s-e a sick
Parse-. Thy ilo not e-jaoUe to'acco, for
they consider that a misuse of fir-.
At the close of mortal life thesou' appears
at the bridge Chinvat, where an anel pre
sides and questions the soul about the
thoughts an 1 words an I dee Is of its earthly
state. JJothin-.', however, is more intense ini
the Tarjee f.iitii than the theory that the
deadv ho ly Is impure A devil is 8tnpo3l
to take p js iss'.oa of the deal holy. All
who tone i It nre unele in, an 1 hen n the
strange style oT o cqui-s. But hern I must
plvethree or foar questions an I answors
from one ol the Parses c lteciilsms ;
Qu' stlon Who Is the most fortunate man
In tho world?
Answer He who is tho most innocent.
Q. Who Is the most iunojent m in in the
world?
A. lie who walks In the path of God an 1
shnns lint of the devil.
Q. Which is the p ith of Gol aal wiioh
that o' th.a devil?
A. Virtue is the path of God and vice that
ol the deviL
Q. What constitu:e3 virlue anl what
Vice?
A. flood thoughts, goo 1 words an i goo 1
deeds constil nte virtu". n i evil thoughts,
evil wor is and evil dee Is constitute vice.
Q. What constitute good thoughts, Rood
words and good d-e Is anl evil thoujts,
evil words an I evil deeds?
A. Honesty, charity and truthfulness
constitute the former, nn 1 dishonesty, want
ot charity nn 1 feiselio lconstitutetho latter.
And now the better to show you these T.-.r-sees
I tell you ot two things 1 saw within a
6hort time In Bombay, India. It was an
afternoon of contr-st.
We started for Malabar hill, on which the
wealthy cIhrsps have their embowered homes
and the P.irisuf 3 their strange ton pie of the
dead. As we ro !o along the water's e Ige
the sun was dt sending the sky, and a dis
ciple tof Zoroaster, a Parsee, wi:s In lowly
posture and with, reverential g izn looking
into the Sky. He would have oeen said to
have b-en worshiping the sun, as all Par
sees are said to worship the fire. But the
intelligent Parseo ilo-s not worship the
fire. He looks upon the sun as the em
bleu of th- warmth and light of the
Creator. Looking nt a blaze of ligut.
whether on hearth, on mountain height or
in the sltv, he can more easily bring to mind
the (tlory ol God at least so th i Pursues
tell me. Indeed they are the pleasautest
heathen I have met. They treat their wives
as equals, while the Hindoos nud Uudd'iists
treat thtm us cattle, although thecattle and
sheep nn I swine are batter oS than most of
the women of In lia. '
This Parage ou the ro-. !s:de on oar way to
Malabar bill was tue only one or that relig
ion I had ever S'sen engage I in wors'.iip.
Who knows but that b-yoad the iigh: oi tun
sun on widen he gazes he may catch a
glimpse of the God who is light and "ia
whom there is uo darkness at ail?"
i We passed on up through gates Into the
'jrarden that surrounds the place where the
Parsoes dispose of thoir dea l. This garden
was Riven by Jamshidji Jijibhal and is beau
tiful with flowers of all liui an I foliage of
all styles of vein and notch and stature.
There is on all id'!S great opulencn of fera
and cypress. The garden Is 10 feet above
the level ol the sea. Not far fro.n the en
trance is a building where the mourners of
the funeral procession ro in to pray. A
light is hero kept turn ng year ia uni year
our.
We ascend tho garden by some eight stone
steps. The body of a deceased aged woman
was tieing carried in tow ird theciiiet "tower
of siifuc-."' Tu".-r are live of theso towers.
Several o. them have not been used lor a
long wt-.!;-. Four persons, whose buslnefll
it is to do this, carry the corps . They nre
followed by two men with long beards. The
tower ot silence to which they come cost
1 150,000 nn I is twenty-live feet high and 270
feet arcun 1 and without a roof.
The four carriers of the dead and
the two bearded men come to th
door oi the tower, enter and leave the deal.
There are three rows of pluces for the dead
the outer row lor the men, the ml tdlo row
for tho women, the inside row for the chil
dren. Tne lireles5jo lies aro left exposed
nsfardowuits the waist. As soon ns the
employes retire fro-n the towerot silence the
vultures, aoff on nu.v two, now many,
wood unoa thn ii il-ss form. These vul-
Itnres fill the nir with thefr disccrlanl
voice. MTo them In long rows ot
hn top of the whitevashel wall of th
tower of silence In n few trfnti'es
thev have taken tho lnt pirtieio of ll-st
from the bones. Thern had evidently bees,
other opportunities for them that dny. nnil
some flew nwav, as though surfeited. Tho5
sometimes enrry nwiv with the-n parts of
body, nnd it is no unu-nu! thing 'or'the gen.
tlemen in theireonutry seats to bnvedror'P"4
into their dooryar Is a bone from the towoi
lof silence.
In the centre of this tow.-r is n well. Into
which the bons are thrown after they are
hleachod. The hot un and thralnvs.asoa
aid charcoal do their work of disintegra-
t Inn n ,1 iatnreetinn mirl fb-'n there AJe
isloicesthat carry Into the sea what remains
nftf-edead. The we-Vthr peonle of Mala
bar hill have made str-Mit-ons effirts to hav
Ihrse st range to (vers removed as a nuisance,
hot they remain and v. Ill no doubt for ng33
remair. ,
1 talked w'th a learned r.irsae about these
mortuary customs. He said: "I suppose
vou consider them very peculiar, but the
fret l we P.irsecs rev.ireneo thn elements ot
refnre nn l c-pnot consent to defile them.
We r-verence the Are, nnl therefore will not
ask it to ! ura out dead, We reverence the
water nrl do not ns ft to su"mrT our
dea.' V.e revrenee the earth and will not
asit it lo bury onr dead. An 1 so we let th
vu'tures take them away."
He confirmed me in the theory that ton
jParseesact on the principle that the deal
hre unoiean. ISO one must iuucusuuu a ic").
frha aaxmera ol this "tomb of silence" most
not put their hands on the form of the de
"psrted. They wear gloves lest aomehow
they should be contaminated. When the
bones are tbs removed from the sties ot
the tower and put in the well t the oenter.
they are touched carefully by tongs. Then
these people besides have very decided theo
ries about the democracy of the to-nhs. N
sncS things as caste among the deil.
Philosopher and boor, the affluent an 1
the destitute must ro ihrounh the ivui
"tower of silence." lie dowu Mis by Bile
with other ocounants, havt their bo lies
dropped Into the same abyss an I hs earrie I
out through the same nana! and float nwiv
on tho same sea. No splea lor of Vuropo is.
No sculp'.nriag ot mausoleuai. Nj pm? of
ito-ne or ohelisk. Zoroaster's taaohtni r
suited In thPse "towers of nlleaen.' Hi
wrote, 'Naked you evno ia'.o the world.aal
naked you must go out."
As I storn at tns aiosn or la tins gtr
"en on Mnlabar hill nnl heir t tie flp of
the vultures' wings coming trt a tielr ra
past, the funeral euston of the Panee
emd horrible beyond eompar, and yet
Or dissolution ot the human body by ny
mode Is awful, and the br.iaks of these fowl
are pro ably no more repulsive than the
worms of t'ae boly devouring the soared
human form in ometertes. Nothing but
the resurrection day can undo the awful
work of death, whether it now be put out of
bight by cutting spade or flying wing.
Starting homeward, we soon were in the
heart of the oity and saw a building all aflash
with lights and resounding with merry
voices. It was a Parsee wedding In a build
ing erectel espeoallly tor the marriage oere
mony. We came to the door and propose 1
to go in. but at first were not permitted.
Thpy saw we vra not P irsees. nn I that
we were not even natives. So, very polite
ly, they halted us ou the doorsteps. This
temple of nuptials was chiefly oceuplel by
women, their ears and necks and
hands aflame with jewels or Imitation of
jewels. By pantomime nn I Kesture, as we
had no use o their vocabulary; we told them
we were strangers and were curious to s?9
by what process Pirs-es were married.
Gradually we worket our way inside the
lojr. The building and the surround
ing were illumined by hundrels of em-
HI011 in irlncuM rv(S Inntarna In 11 m 'rr n
' and Krotesquo holdings. Conversation ran
1. : -1. 1 1 1, . 1 , ., 1 1 i , 1
miii. nui ' mauler uuunie.i uv3r, rtu 1 nil
w.:s gay. T"en them w.as a sound or an nd
vaueing baud of music, but the instruments
for the most p rt were stran ;e to our enrs
au-l eyes. Lou lor and lou-ier werj the out
side voices fin It he win 1 and stringed Instru
ments, until the procession baited at the
door of the temple and the bridegroom
mounted the steps. Ta-n the music
caod, and all the voices were
stilL The mother ot ttie bride
groom, with a platter loaded with
aromaiies and articles of fool, confronted
her son and began to address him. Then
he took iro n thn plitter a bottle of per
fume an I sprinkle. 1 his face with the re
dolence. All the while sp.-aklng in a droning
tone, she took from the platter a handful
of riC3, throwing some ot it on his head,
spilling soxe of it on his shoulder, pouring
some of it on his hands. She took from the
pia'ter a cojoanut and waved It about his
heal. She lifted a garland of flowers
and threw it over hLs neck and a bou
quet ol flowers and put it iu his hand, Her
part of the ceremony eooipletad, the band
resumed its musio, and through another
doortbe bridegroom was conducted into the
center ottho budding. Tae bride was In
the room, but there was nothing to designate
her.
" Where Is the bride?" I said. "Whore Is
the bride?' A'ter awhile she was made
evident. Tne bride and grootc were seated
on c'lairs opposite each o'.her. A white cur
tain was dropped betweea thetn so that they
could not see each other. Then the attend
ants put their nr.-ns under thU curtain, took
a long rope of linen nnd wound It around
the neck of the bride and the groom In
token T.iat they were to b J I ound to
gether for lile. Then soma silk strings
werd we.uad around the couple, now around
this one an I now around that. Then the
groom threw a bandlul of rice across the
curtain on the head ot tne bride, nnd ths
bride response 1 by throwing a handful of
rice across the curtain on the head of the
groom. Tncreupon the curtain dropped,
and the bride's chair was removed and put
beside that of the groom. Tnen a priest of
.the Parsee religion arose and faced the cou
ple. Before the priest was placed a
platter of rice. H began to address the
.young man and woman. We could not bear
a word, but we understood just as well as If
,we had heard. Ever and anon he punctu
ated his ceremony by a handful of rice,
which he picked up from the platter and
rCung now toward the groom and now toward
.the bride. Tne ceremony went on intermin
kibly. Wd wanted to hear the conclusion,
but were told that the cerenony would go
loafora long while, indeed that It would
not conclude until 2 o'clock in the morning,
pnl this was only between 7 and 8
,0'clock in the ev, nmg. There would be a
(recess niter awhile in the ceremony, but It
jwould be taken up again In earnest at half
Jpast 12. We enjoyed what W) had seen, but
ielt Incapacitate 1 for six more hours of
welding ceremony.) Silently wishing the
couple a br.ppy life ia eaoh other's coaipan
jlonshlp. we pressed our way ttirouj.i the
jthroni; oi congratulatory P.irsees. All of
them s;emed bright and appreciative of thd
'occasion. The streets outside joyously sym
pathized with the transactions inside,
j We rode on toward our hotel wishing that
imnrrlage in all India might be as mu,:h hon
lored as in the ceremony w.! had that evening
lwi.tnes.sed at theParsce wedding. The Hin
doo wooien are not so marr.ed. They are
Islmply ctrsel into the conjugal relation.
MHuy of lue g.ris are marriea at seven an I
Iten ye::rs of :: -e, anJ sow of the:u are
Vrun Imoihen at thirty. Tiiey caa never go
.lortii into the sunlight withtacir faces un
covered. Th'y must stay at borne. All
styles of m-iltreatmpnt aro thtlrs1. If
they become Christians, they become
jnutens'.s. A missionary to'd me in In
ii:i of a Hindoo woman who beenmen I'liris
jlinn. hne had nine children. Her hu-dvini
nv.'.s oyer seventy vears ot age. An I ye: at
her Christian baptism he tol I her to po. end1
ho went out homeless. As long as woman
is down India will be down. Xo nation was
ever elevated except through the elevation
oi woman. Parsee marriage Is an Improve
ment on Hindoo marriage, but Christian
marriage is an Improvement on Parsee mar
riage. A fellow-traveler in India told me he had
been writing to his home In England trying
to g-t n law passed that no white woman
coul.l be legally married in India until she
had bren there "six months. Admirable law
would that be! If aw::i!e woman saw
what married life with a Hindoo Is, she
wonld never undertake it. OH with the
thick nnd ugly veil from woman's face. Oft
with the crushing burdens Irom her shoul
der ! Nothing but the gospel of Jesus Christ
will ever make Ufa in Iu lia what it ought
to be.
But what nn afternoon ot contrast la
Bombay we exparirneed I From the temple
of silence to tho temple of hilarity. From
the vultures to the doves. From
mourning to laughter. From (fathering,
shadows to gleaning lights. From obse
quies to wedding. But how much ot all
our lives is made np ol such opposites! I
have earried ia the same pocket anl read
from them In the same hour the liturgy
of the dead nnd the ceremony of espousals.
And so the tear meets the smile, and the
dove meets the vulture.
Thus I have sbt before the best of all the
religions of the heathen world, and I hv
done so In order that you might come to
higher appreciation ot the glorious religion
which has put Its benediction over us and
over Christendom.
Compare the nlsurdities and mummeries
of heathen marriage with the plnln "I will"
ot Ciiristinu marriage, the bands joined In
pledge "till death do you part." Compare
t ho dod rine that the dead may not be touched
with as sacred and;tender and loving a kiss as
iver given, the Inst kiss ot lips that never
again will speak to us. Compare the nar
row bridge Chluvat over which the de
parting Parsee soul must tremblingly
cross to the wide open gate of
heaven through which the departing Chris
tian soul may triumphantly enter. Compare
tho twenty-one books of the Zjnd Avesta of
the Parsjo which even the scholars of th
earth despair of understanding with our
B ble. so muoa of it as Is necessary for our
salvalion in Innguage so plain that 4'a way
faring man, though a fool, need not errthern
in." Compare the "tower of lilenoe." with
Its vultures, nt Bombay with the Greeen
wood, of Brooklyn, with Its sculptured
angels of resurrection. And bow yourselvsa
in thanksgiving and prayer as you realize)
that If at the battles of Marathon and Sals
mis Persia bad triumphed over Greece la
stead of Greece triumphaatlng over Persia,
Pnrseeism, which was the national religion
of Persia, might have covered the earth, and
you and I instead ot sluing in the noon
day light of our glorious Christianity
might have been groping th Aa depressing
shadows of Parsee ism, a religion as inferior
to that whloh la our inspiration in lire and
our hope In death as Zoroaster of Persia was
inferior to our radiant and superhuman
Christ, to whom be honor and glory and do
minion and victory and song, world without
end. Amen.
TRUMPET CALLS.
Barn's Horn Sounds si Wsrssis Kct to
the TCBredeemed.
XVY is as dead
ly as the small
pox. A kicking cow
often gives good
milk.
There is no
more foolish fool
ishness than
worry.
The bread God
gives is always
fresh and sweet.
God jan forgive sin, but He won't
Mess laziness.
It doesn't make sin any whiter to
call it a mistake.
Every lie is the assassin of soine
body's happiness.
The thing that really damns men is
their love for sin.
The right kind of faith prefers God's
will to its own will.
There is no use in talking any
higher than we live.
An hour spent in bad company is a
long step toward the pit.
You can disaiiHint the devil in one
way by keeping out of debt.
True faith never hesitates about
stepping where God directs.
If some of us would praise God more
we would blame our neighbors less.
TnE only thing about some churches
that points to Heaven is the steeple.
Live at peace with all men, and you
will have the devil's war all you life.
A iivrocRiTE only wears his mask
while he thinks he is being watched.
If there were no fools in the world
the lawyers would all be out of work.
The real duty is neglected when we
step over one duty to perform another.
To have to hoe the same row over
every dav soon takes the poetry out of
life.
Trying to obtain happiness simply
to have it, is nothing more than seliish-
DCS3.
Whenever God enters upon a work
of creation, the first thing He makes is
light.
The devil wins many a battle by
gutting God's troops to fire into each
other.
Heaven is to be given to those who
are trying to make a Heaven of this
earth.
The man who swears has something
in his heart that the devil wants to stay
there.
If you say "Good morning" to the
devil he will offer you his arm to take
a walk.
Don't think about the storm bein-
black. Remember that God gave tl.j
rainbow.
As long as we look at men to find
out what God is doing, we shall be dis
appointed. The man who breaks the golden
rule does not keep any of the com
mandments. The devil has both hands on the
man who will not follow his honest
Donvictions.
There is no work so humble that
faithfulness in it will not be noticed
and rewarded.
The poorest people in the world are
those who are trying the hardest to
keep all they get.
The people who weigh the most in
the church for God do not always sit in
the "amen corner."
The devil never gets a chance to
rest in the neighborhood of the man
whom God pronounces perfect.
The devil lays down his gun when
sver he hears a preacher begin to
apologize for preaching the truth.
The right kind of a prayer for the
the conversion of sinners, does all it
can to get to them with the gospel.
If the devil can pursuade you to take
one step, he will make it an unanswer
able argument as to by you should
take another.
The address lately made by the Rev.
Dr. Mackay-Smith of St. John's Church
at the Boston Church Congress on the
Sunday newspaper is pronounced by
the Outlook to be one of the most bril
liant and well-considered papers ever
given on the floor of any religious
gathering in this country.
TnE Rev. Mr. Watson of Kingston,
X. Y., who has carried ritualism in his
church to the extent of swinging the
censer, is in a fair way of losing all his
parishioners. But he is obstinate and
says: "Though they sway the sun on
my right hand and the moon on my
left, they shall not prevail."
The Middle-Aged Woman.
The fascinating middle-aged woman
is not looking for flattery. Either she
has had enough of it, or she knows
that men bestow it easily on all women
alike, and she avoids it as something
ungenuine. This middle-aged woman's
unselfishness is, indeed, "adorable,"
and the observing young woman's
views ia distorted when to her it ap
pears "sad." The woman of mature
years is good-natured because she dare
not be otherwise. She has learned a
lesson that all observing young women
would do well to learn, namely, that a
gentle nature and sweet disposition
are not only among woman's most po
tent charms, but that they keep the
possessor young and lovable long after
the years count up to that time call
middle age-
.vili tne American Ulrl Skilobn?
It will not be Ion in all probabil
.cy before the American girl will go
skilobnlng. This has a pt.rtentious
sound, but merely refers to the wiu.
ter spurt or Scandinavia. It consists
In scudding over the snow and Ice
after being shod with the skee, a
long wooden snowshoe. Austrian
ladies of fashion are devoted to the
new sport, and it will get to New
York sooner or later.
sjjie things are called sweet.wblcb
;annot be tasted.
GREAT BRITAIN HOLDS THE KEY. ,
She Uu 1.400,000 Square Miles la tlis
Dark Continent.
The latest acquisition of African
territory gives Great Britain an un
broken line across the length of Africa
from the Mediterranean and the Jlle
to the extreme point of the continent.
In all', this territory, held in the vari
ous ways, from Cape Colony up to the
"occupation" of Egypt, is in extent
about 1,400,000 square miles, and has
a population of 30,000,000. In the
Kile valley it includes incomparably
the best of North Africa. In Uganda
it holds the key to the lakes of Central
Africa, nearly as large as our own lake
system. The new treaty gives it the
high land west of Lake Tanganyika,
considerably higher and healthier than
the eastern, in German hands. The
new conquests of the British South
Africa Company and the great table
lands of the interior of subtropical
Africa, in much of which white men
live. Lastly, there is Cape Colony, the
only vital European settlement in all
Afriaa. As it stands, this great high
way holds two-thirds of all Africa in
wlych Europeans can live and marry
on efficient administration. It has the
most fertile tract in the continent in
Egypt, its healthiest in Cape Town, its
greatest gold mines and the only region
from which tropical Africa can be con
trolled. Still more important is its re
lation to African water courses. A
steamer can start at Alexandria and
run, when the mahdi's successor is
cleared away, to a point on Albert
Edward Jfyanza, 125 miles from Lake
Tanganyika. This runs to within 70
miles of Lake Xyassa. From this lake
the Shire River, broken at Murchison
Falls, descends to the Zambesi and the
Indian Ocean. From a navigable point
on the Congo it is less than 100 miles
to Lake Tanganyika. The Aruwini
runs as near the Nile. It is possible to
start at the mouth of the Zambesi and
reach the mouth of the Congo or Xile
with less than 200 miles of land travel,
and the key and center to this great
system is now in English hands.
"Balmy on the Crumpet."
Nothing shows so clearly the wealth
and elasticity of our language as the
immense number of elegant synonyms
which may be employed to describe a
person whose intellect is "like sweet
bells jangled. He is "wrong in his
nut," "dotty in the filbert,", has "a bee
in his bonnet," "lack twopence in the
shilling," "has a tile off," and many
other things too numerous to mention.
John Abraham has none of these ail
ments, but admitted to Mr. de Rutzen,
the magistrate at Westminster, that he
vas called "balmy on the crumpet."
"What on earth does that mean?"
asked his worship. "That, sir," re
plied the accused, "signifies wrong in
the upper story." It must be admit
ted that Abraham's conduct was cal
culated to give reasonable grounds foi
the supposition that by whatever name
it may be called, ho suffers from some
kind of cerebral disturbance. For at
an early hour on Saturday morning,
while the only wealth he possessed was
number of pawntickets, he hired a
cab in the neighborhood of Eaton
place, entered it with a lady with the
sole aim of her reformation, and would
have driven nobody knows where had
not the cabman received private in
formation from a colleague that one oi
Abraham's peculiarities was what is
technically known as "bilking." The
driver accordingly demanded his fare
right off, and received as an answer a
considerable amount of abuse. He at
once drove to a police station, and the
interview there with the authorities
led to "balmy on the crumpet's" ap
pearance before Mr. de Rutzen on a
charge of disorderly conduct, says the
London Daily Telegraph. As the ec
centric personage squared the financial
demands of the cabman, the magis
trate agreed to let him go after bind
ing him over to keep the peace and to
be of good behavior.
Tne Percentage of Wrongdoers.
I crossed on one of the big Atlantic
liners lately, with 500 other saloon pas
sengers. They were naturally people
of intelligence, and presumably of easy
circumstances. Yet at least half of
those people were planning to rob out
Government of money by contriving
plans to avoid paying duties truly
owed. To do this all of them had to
break our laws, and in most cases had.
in addition, to lie deliberately.
Many of them were planning to ac
complish this theft by the bribery of
the Custom House Inspectors, thus not
merely making themselves thieves, but
bribing other men to do wrong. In
this city I can show you blocks so
densely inhabited that they are an elec
tion district themselves. Blocks in
which twenty people live and sleep in
a single room year after year, where
the birth of a little life into the world
means that all must eat less and be
warm. But I cannot find in
the poorest and vilest parts of the city
any Diook where the percentage of
liars and thieves and bribegivers is as
large as was that among the first-class
passengers of that floating palace.
Each condition of society has its own
misdoings, and, I believe, varies little
In the percentage of wrongdoers to the
whole. From "The Honorable Feter
Sterling," P. L. Ford.
Shot a Hawk and Got a Grouse.
George Dimon of Kettle Creek, V
Y., was hunting partridges near Cross
Forks the other day. Suddenly a big
hawk swooped to the ground not more
than five rods in front of him, and al
most immediately took wing again.
Dimon brought the hawk down, but
had to give it both barrels. As the
hawk turned and fluttered in the air in
its fall another bird came plumping to
the ground. It was a fat hen grouse,
the prey upon which the hawk had
swooped. The grouse was dead, but
not from the hunter's shot. The hawk
bad pierced the game bird's head
through and through with its talons.
A Big XMfferenc.
The farmers of Virginia avera.
100 per capita in earnings; Maryland
farmers average $380. The difference
is said to be due to the presence of,
manufactures in the latter State. Kate'
Field's Washington.
New Yorkers are saict to prefer
oysters that have laid for soma little
time in fresh water, as it makes them
flump and white.
THIRTY-THREE. FEET AT A LEAP.
ffha Tremendous lnp Made by a IkOnjrrj
WUdrat After Bis Breakfast.
The wonderful power of a wildcat ia
shown in its ability to leap long dis
tances. All of the cat tribe have im
mense power in their legs and thej
make up in the length of their sprina
their inability to make a continued
chase. African leopards in captivitj
have been known to leap from the
floor of the cages and strike the top,
twelve feet above. Tigers make tre
mendous leaps and strike down theii
prey with a blow of their powerful
paws as they alight. But the wildcat,
for its, size, is probably the most won
derful jumper of all tho felines. A
hunter who is well known for his ve
racity recently told a Boston Journal
man the following story of an adven
ture which illustrates this power:
"I was hunting in the snow ano
came across the track of a wildcat
which I followed a long distance. Sud
denly the tracks came to an end in a
spot where the animal had crouched
I looked around to see what had be
come of the trail, and away ahead oi
me I saw a bunch of blood and feath
ers. From that spot the track led of)
again into a swamp. The situation
was susceptible to but one explana
tion. The wildcat had been hunting
bid dinner and had discovered a pheas
ant wandering about in the snow. Thi
cat crept as close as he dared to thi
unsuspecting bird and gathered him
self into an animated ppiral spring,
such as all the cat tribe coil themselvci
into when preparing to spring, and, re
leasing the trigger, shot into the air,
landing on top of the victim before tin
bird, as quick as pheasants usually are,
could evade the stroke. The distancl
from where the cat crouched to when
it caught the bird was just thirty-threi
feet. I naturally supposed from thi
length of the leap that the cat wai
young and in full activity, but after 1
trailed it to the swamp and shot it 1
discovered that it was old ahd almost
toothless. The animal's hunger maj
have spurred him to the great jumj
If not, and the leap was an evidence cj
what a superannuated wildcat can do,
I wouldn't be surprised to learn that a
young and active wildcat could clear at
least twice the distance when pressej
by necessity."
WRITING THAT PAYS.
Ctrenty-FlTe Thousand Dollars for Only
Ten Words.
In an Ohio town thirty years agi.
lived an old fellow worth a couple ol
hundred thousand dollars or so, who
was given to writing "pieces for the
papers." They were good, too; and the,
old gentleman felt a just pride in them,
and often had them printed in the lo
cal papers of his town. One time he.
made a visit to Cincinnati, and took ao
extra good one along with him to see
what the city papers would do with it
The first editor who read the article ac
cepted it on the spot and wanted to
pay him for it, though he had nevei
seen him before, and didn't know hire
trom Adam's off ox.
"What pay do you expect for thisf
inquired the editor.
"I don't know exactly," hesitated
the old gentleman, thinking it was a
pretty good joke.
"Have you ever been paid for any ol
your writings?"
"Some," responded the applicant foi
literary honors, with a twinkle in his
lys as a new idea came to him.
"How much, for instance?"
"Well, on one occasion," smiled the
old gentleman, "I received $25,000 for
ien words, not counting the signature."
The editor almost fell out of his
ihair.
"What!" he exclaimed, dropping tht
Article he was negotiating for.
The visitor repeated his statement.
"Great CVsar, man," asked the ed
Uor, "how did you get that much?"
"Simply by writing: 'Pay to tec or
der of John Bland 25,000.' "
This time the old gentleman laughed
vigorougly and the editor blushed and
begged his pardon and invited him to
dinner. Detroit Free Press.
It Was Her Pa.
A ragged little girl dashed into tht
San Francisco Coroner's office and in a
voice full of terror cried:
"Oh, mister! come down quick! A
man down to our house has taken a
dose of orpheum!"
"Is he dead?" asked a Deputy Cor
oner.
"So; but he's goin' to die an' he's
mussin' up things orful a kickin'
aroti-1. Won't you please come gel
biniV
"You had better call a physician
He might recover."
"That's what ma said, an' she wanted
you to get him before he did. I'm
feared she'll hit him with the ax if he
commences gettin' better."
"Who is the man?"
"Pa. He's been drunk fer a yeai,
an' ma can't support him no longer, let
alone payin' doctor's bills to pump the
poison out of him."
The child manifested no little disap
pointment when the Coroner refused to
take charge of the live remains.
A Strange Plaut.
The late Desire, of the Bouffes Pat
lsiens, had a friend passionately fond
of flowers and rare plants, and who
considered himself a great judge of
them. One day Desire buried a dead
rat in a flower pot, and, allowing
the tall to remain above the earth, tied
it up to a training-stick. He sent this
pot to his friend as a very rare speci
men of cactus. After many days ol
great care and constant watering, which
such a valuable exotic required, thn
victim of Desire's pleasantry began to
think something might be amiss with
the root. He pulled the prodigy from
the pot, and smelt a rat.
The man who always lies does not
always deceive.
A Natural Mistake.
Train-Robber (in the Pullman
Tour money or your life! Sleepy Pas
senger (wrathfully) Confound you,
porterl I'll call you when I want you
Hudson (N. Y.) Register.
When Be Wanted to Vail.
She When will you call and set
papa? He (nervously) I don't know
When will he be out? Oakland (C. J
Acorih
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