LAUGJI AND GROW FAT. t HEALTHY TONIC FOR V A LIDS OF ALL KINDS. IN- Biim awe Aaaodataa Glaaned from T rS- m Sour Something- to Rad Whlel Win Hakf Anjbady Slaaf) Wall Battel Tbu Medlolae Wkii Takes UoWro Ke- Urtnc. Great nisappolatment. Fiddlcbark I hear. Miss Somerset that you spent g'-vernl weeks la pre parlag yoar graduation essay. How wa It received? Mls Somerset I didn't read it af ter all. Flddleback "What! Xot road It Tray what was the trouble? MIsg Somerset My dress didn'' come la time. Cloak Keview. "Where. Thine Crow larre. Miss Athenla Hubb (shopping in the Windy city) I wish to get a paii of boots. Gentlemanly Clerk What size dc Tou wear? Nuinher two." "Jfumber two! Excuse me, but jruew you must be mistaken; ladies' alzes only rundown to sixes." Boston Courier. It Refers to inon Only. Ltttle Xleco Aunty, yoa are ar ild maid. Aunt Mary Ye, darling. Little JUece Don't the Bible sa It Isn't good to be alone? Aunt Mary It speaks only of the men In this respect, darling, and does riot refer to women. Most of the cornea are better off alone. The Jester. Mr. O'Shea Murphy vrud have a fine comfortable house there If he didn't have a mortgage on it. Mrs. OShea An is that the mortgage phat sticks out av the rool? Truth. How Paralysis Comet Cpon One. "Watt I tell you it makes a man feel pretty serious ta Und himself threatened with paralysis. Potts You don't mean to say that It Is your case, do you? Watts Yes my butcher told mi that if I didn't do something for him by the first of the month he would Daraiyze me. Indianapolis Journal. A Varrnw Escape. Jack You know how madly I wor hip Clara Gushington? His Sister Yes, Jack, and I think she is interested in you. Jack I have bought a beautiful pair of bracelets but I am afraid they are a little largo. fl is Sister (faintly) ITeavens, Jack' Those are not bracelets! Life. The Short and Straight Way. Wch Man If I make out a will bow am I going to know whether 1 won't be contested or not? Lawyer There is one way to make a sure thing of It and avoid all un necessary complications. Rich Man How Is that? Lawyer Make it out to me direct Detroit Free Frcsa. Kellef with a Tenfreanre. "Thank heaven," sighed the editor, for another day of rest! It's such a relief to co Sunday come 'round." "Yes, dear," said his good wife. "Now, strap the twins on your back, tal:e Molly and the basket in your arms and we'll walk three m:los to church! Atlanta Constitution. A Great Creation Mr. nardacre I tell yoa what, Becky; this 'ere fly-pa; er I brought from town is great! Hits 'em every time. (Shwack!) Here goes another victiml Same Hero. American Gir' Is ittnstomary foi some one to give the bride away at wedding in England? Englishman Yea. "But the bridegroom la not gVreo away?" "So; but he Is sometimes sold."-' Hew York Press. A Masterpiece. Bunting Is young Dobber much ol a painter' Larkln I should say ho was. He painted a picture of a swamp so na turally tbat it actually bred mosqul toes. Detroit Free Press. Maoh in m Name. Come, Mousev!" he called at the head of the cabin stairs as the bout landed. The passengers watched, ays the Detroit Free Press, wonder ing meanwhile if Mousey were s black-and-tan or a skye terrier. "The boat's nearly there. Birdie!" he called again. Were there two of them? All ejes were strained, but nothing answered to the call. The whistle of the steamer blew, and again tbe man peered anxiously down the cabin stairs over tbe head of the up-rush-inir crowd. "Duckey!" he called loudly, aren't you coming?" Ko Ducky" put In an appearance, and again he called In a pleading tone: "B-a-b-yl why don't you hurrv? We'll be the last to get off the boat." Then a woman weighing at least 250 pounds appeared on the stairw.iy car rying a big lunch basket, two camp chairs, and several shawls and rugs. I'm coming, bubby," she said pla ' cldiy, and everybody who saw her coming got out of the way as they recalled Mr. Shakspeare's perUncnt Inaulry: "What's in a name. " 1 r EUSHES AND jSRKF.P. FROM THE FKEVCH. THE One pleasint evening lu Miy, litle Arnold Lambert and his fattier were sitting on a hill-side, admiring the beauty of the scene, ove wnicli tbe slowly sinking sun was she Idinjr a beaut fnl polden light. Suddenly they were distnr ed bv the shouts of a shepherd-bo., who w,is lending home his flock from neighbouring flVld. . both sidee of the r..d aloug wl. eh ho s going there were bo ue very thorny i.usbes, and uot a s eepconld pass them -vithont bavi gb.ts of its Ueece torn awav. O seeing this Iittl3 Arnold was very m-rv. . F-ther!" leermd, "I wonder why o e ou-- does not cut t'io-e t us es .town. l'oo st-e how they are roli iue ih htp f tin ir woo? If the poor things go along that road many inre times tiif.v wi 1 have a. I their' coat there. Might 1 let npearlv to- m.rrow morula '. and come here witn. mv little hxtc et, ami out a 1 the busi es don mvn-lf? And," he aildcd, af ter a short pause, "cool In t yon come with mi1, too, fuller, and bring yonr Uige hnut ui:-kuiie, and we wonld clear them away beiore breakfaat tiine?" "1 will see a ont vonr plan. Am 'Id, cepl ed -Mr. Lambert, searcely able to , rentrnin a siuile a the boy's eager ; words. "Meituw'dlc, dou't be so an- Zrj with the bushes, but remember what we onrnlves do." 1 "What, father?" asked Arnold, in wonder. "Ilnve yon not seen the shepherds Hke tteir Inrae scis crs and r b ttie .renibbngs eep, not of nmll flakes of , wool, but of the whole fleece?" "(Jb, yes, futher; became we are obliged to make our clothes of it. And, , resides, I have often heard yon say, that the sheep cast their fleeces natur llv nbont this time of tbs year, so: it is much better for ns to take them (or our use than to let them fall and was'e." 'Certainly, Arnoll. God has given ill animal- tneir c.oth'iig: and we are obliged to borrow ours from them, if we do not i':h to go without, and to e expo ed to the lrosts and cold of ( iu!er." "ttu father, the bushes hfive no ueed of cloth. s, so th .t settles the nest ion. L'o sny we may cut them own." I "Very well, Arnold: we will be here to-morrow at dny-break. But I think we mnst return li'tne now, for the -un la sot un.l the air is unite chilly." Aruol 1, believing tl-ut be was about o be hero, by destroying witii his l.ttl" arm thit W on f" robter", could scmeelv sleep lhat night, so fall was he of his foithcoming victories. So ireely Iind the swett songs of the birds in the rees near bis in low announced the return of duv, before he hastened to ironse his father. Mr. Lambert him--elf was no less eafT to ri-e, though uot so nvich occupied with the destruc- , tion of the bushes as delist -d at h iv isg found an opportunity of showing Arnold the loveliness of the opemug .lay. They . n-ssed omcklv, took their weapons, and then t-et out oc he r eipe itition. Arnold running so fast tbat his . father bad so-ne dttlicultr in keep ng up with Lia steps; bu', on npproaciiug h- bushes, t -v kmw a pre t nnnjber of bir s com ug and uoing on nil sides, nd ho pi aliout amongst the nineties. ssoitly, Art.o'd!" wh;R-ered Mr. Lamlert; "sieo softly, or we shall frigbten these innocent creatn-es. ; Come np the hid where we s:it yester I lay evening, mid p rlinps we shil be able to find ont what they are seeking so Imsilv hum nj the buslies." j They ascend, d the hill; a- 1 pat dowL and then they saw tbat the birds were carrying away in their be.iks tne very tiakts of wool wlii h the bushes bad torn off th- sheep tha; evening l efore. i Finehis, linnets, spnrrows, and many ot! er birds were there, enricuing L m Ives with the booty. i . t:at do yon say to that, father?" . cried Arnold. "Son ething I have often wished to say, Arnold," r plied his father: "lhat (i d takes care of t e smadest cri a-tnre-, and suphes them with all they ni ed for their happiness and comfort. 1 n see tbe poor birds are fi ding hresometbi g witti which to f irms i t e ijonie they are making for their l.ttl ones; o 'h s hom st bush, agii st wnieh yo.i spoke so Iimm ily yes er ay, la of so ne use. It onl.' aske I a 1 Hie from those who have plenty, tht it might give it to tho e in need. Do yoa wi h to destroy it now, Arnoll?" "Oh, no never! cried Arnold. That is r uht, my b y!" replied 'r Lambert, "let it nourish in pence, s nee it makes such a good use of ita conquests!" Kellik Kuod. ITott Chlnee gotil'ere are Paid. I The Chine -e soldier receives his pay once a month only, and Chinese months It mav be remembered, are much larger than those we ars accus tomed to reckon bv. On the eve of the pay-day the captain of a company, to jjether with his sergeant-major, iroes and receives the amount of money requisite to pay his company fiom his next superior oilicer. This is not paid to him In Jingling coins, but in pure silver, v-hich, how ever, has been broken iuto somewhat irregular pieces. The whole of the night preceding pay-day is occupied la weighing out for each man the re quired quantity of silver, and this occupatiou. as may be imagined, is a very tedious one, and only success fully accomplished by infinite care, for here a piece the size of a pin's head has to le ch pped off, and there a piece of larger dimensions has to be added to make up weight, aud any deviation one way or the other means the loss of perhaps a day's pay ormoro to some poor defender ot the celestial empire. When tho process of meting out I iccimp islnd. the silver is carefully wrapped in ra er, upon which is written the name of the Intended recipient. On the following after noon the company is mustered, and the sergeant-ruajordivides the money, commencing with the tirst man in the company, and go;ng on to tha last. When this division is con cluded, the i,U"st'on is asked in sten torian tones "Has any one else a claim?" and t!ie customary "No" having been promptly given the men are then dismissed. Each one now repairs to the near est tradesman's shop, where he ex changes hi3 silver. For one teal ha receives 1,600 small coins called cash, perforated in the center so as to al low of being threaded on a string, and, having received the propel amount, turns homeward with 8 cheerful mien but nearly sinking be neath his burden. Tho private receives three and a na f tea s. e ;ii il to aliout nineteen shillings, m nthly. out of which h has to provide himself with clothe! and food. But he lives on rice, and bis clothes cost hut a tri He- No m ti is 'o p i t -o be generous Th v"- 1 -a -t'Mi-k to doing one's t-l 1 tl -t t' woild at o ce demand: ots ni"rp of ' he same ipinlitv. Th ie l a man in M ntez inn, Ga., wi o hid h . aim d.sio m d at, ti a iouller n irty-eulit t toes and hud his leg, dislocated at the hip elht timet. THE 1 T GOT NOTHING ON THAT'LL Sr-OIL." BT "H EDICT'S." "Don't yon worry. Willie," said Nora; "I've got nothing on that'll spoil " What!" I exclaimed; "not that sau cy bonnet or is it a hat? which yonr prettr sunshade will hardly protect; not all those flnzzy faldarals and gauzy fandangos 7ak 'aCe furbelows?" Mora laughed. "A capital hand yon are," she said. at describing a lady's dress. Why don't on wiite for tne Journal den Modes! l'onr contribut ons would at least pos sess the merit of originality." Nothing on to spoilt" 1 added. "Wby, mv dainty cousin yon'd spoil your-elf if exposed to the violonoe of a Highland thunder-storm." "If you worry I'll go back," she said with decision. Well, that wa putting her foot down on me with a venge oioe. But it was a way that Nora h id, and I knew better than to say another word. The facts of the case, reader, are soon explained. A poor old woman in the glen beneath ns, while lying ill, had dreamt she was eating cloudberries, and Dext morning was snperstitionnly impressed with the notion that if she could onlv get some of this delight ful frmtahe wonld soon be well, and,as sbe expressed it, "make an omadhaun (fool) of the doctor." Well, my cousin Nori and I were then on our way to get some that is all. The cloudberry is a kind of de licious Alpine strawberry, found grow ing high np on Scottish mountains wbere the clouds rest; henoe the name. It is said the fairies' hide them from all but good people; bnt Nora and 1 thought ourselves good enough to find a lot. But if Nora had a fa nit, it was that ehe was a trifle self-willed. The morn i ig had been still and sultry, and she wonld not be advised by me to "rig ont," as sailors say, in cloth or serge. "Yon are not going to a garden party, yon know, Nora," I had said. "I know I'm not." "And that mountain yonder is five miles to the top, and in height just half a mile above tbe sea-level and if a storm should come on aid the temper ature rnsh down to thirty-two de grees, where will we be?" "Why, on tho mountain, of course!" And yonder now the storm was com ing, and we were birely balf-war np. Shapeless masses of clond were gather ing und banking np in tbe horizon, though but dimly seen through a kind of sulphurous haze; thunder was mut tering and growling in the distance, and every now and then a streak of lightning told me that tbe storm was making rapid strides towards ns Ihere wasn't a bit of shelter any where only bare blnffs covered with stunted heath and Alpine flora, with here and there a plateau in which were pools of water as dark as porter. But all at once we reached a splendid patch of th delicious frnit we Lai climbed to seek. 1 he'd my peace. I was wondering what Nora wonld do. Sbe was looking nervous and uneasy. Nearer and nearer came the storm. Already all was gloom in the glen far beneath. Then a few orops or rain were blown in onr faces by some mys tetions wind or another. "I say," said Nora, suddenly placing one hand on my arm, "Cin't we monnt above it?" Wuy, as she spoke she positively looked inspired. Next minnte we were hurrying higher and hlgber towards the mountain's summit. Says Longfellow "Thp shade of nictit wore fall Incr fast, Ai thro' an Ah'lne vlihnre passed A youti, who bore, 'mid snow and loa, A banner, w.th a strange il- vice 'Excelsior.' " But I do believe that had tho bold youth been with Nora and me now, wj should have tanght him a lesson in hill-climbing. In le1 than half an hour we had reached the summit, and stood high above the storm, w. ich was now raging in all its fury along the glen as solemn and impressive a scene as any I ever have beheld, to say nothing of the wild grandeur of the view all aronnd ns hill pil-d on hill, with loch, and moor, and stream. We stayed here until th9 storm had entirely cleared away, and the sun was once more mirrored on the like below. Then we descended to the brow of the hill, and filled tbe basket with the tawny cloudberries Tne story stops here. But it fur nishes me with two texts on which to found my little health-sermon. "I've got no'hing on that'll spoil. No a and I were fortunate that day in escaping the storm. Had it come on half an hour before, we should have been in it shelterless and unprotected. For myself it wonld have matt-red little or nothing, being inured to changes but even many a strong girl has onught her death from exposure to weather not half so inclement s tbe drenching rain, the cold hail, aud sleet, of a thunderstorm on a bare hillside. This country possesses the most uncertain climate of any conntry in the world, and girls wonld consult thtir own safety, even in summer, and es ecially at the seaside.by never going from home unprepared for consequen ce. Sauntering about the parade or rands, it docs not signify; bnt near to I all seaside resorts there are v hat are called places of interest; thither yon will drive, usually in a brake or char-a-banc. It may be warm, and clour an l fine before yon start, bnt towards mid day, or afterwards a snmmer storm may come on; and down rushes the temperature, and before yoa are aware what has happened yoa are chilled to the bone. Perhaps no amount of after care or attention will enable yon to shake off the effects of that chill, till von have passed through a long cloud of sickness, and emerged a sadder and a wiser girl bnt looking years older. Yon had "nothing on to spoil," had yon? That is what yon said before yon started; and it would n't be rain, and an nmbreila looked lidiuulous, and a cloak was Cnmber s roe, and so on, and so forth. Be sides yon had been in the habit of thinking yonrself so strong and robust, and possessed of snch a constitution. Believe me, girls, it Is often people who boast thus who go down first, and have even more difficulty in getting np aainthin our thinner, more fiagilo. bat "nerveful'' girls. I coin the word nervefal" in contradistinction to "nervous," which is generally under stoo I to mean the possession of nerves that are weak and shaken. A girl then shonld remember that, although she may have no dress on that will spoil, she has health, and she may spoil that. Many people catch cold soon through the feet and legs And it is a fact that, if these are well protected by warm, thick stockings on a journey or pleas ure trip, the wearer can weather al most anything. Tbe reason is this: the feet and lower parts of the legs are bnt sparsely protected by mnsole, yet all the blood in the body passes through these about once in every thr-e minutes. If these portions of the body therefore are ice cold, and you are sittiDg still in a char-n-bano or boat, the blood is bound to get chilled, and to pass upwards towards the heart in this oold condition. In a lesser degree the same holds good or bad as regards the bands. If I can bnt succeed in getting my B rl readers or their mothers either, to remember and profit by those wholesome truths this paper will not have been written in Tain. I shonld add, that there ia often more danger of a chill while going ont for a sail or row than ia taking a drive. It may feel warm and balmy on shore. bat your boat has no sooner made a bit of offing than the wind blows ronnd yonr waist, and seems trying to rnt yon in two. in goinz, therefore, tor either a sail or drive, do tiof forget your mackintosh; and shonld you ex-, pect to bs out after sunset, take yonr feather boi also. Yon are evei better provided thns than yon would be with ' an umbrella. 1 myself )ae all a' Scotchman's prejudice against an um brella, much preferring a plaid in all weathers, and 1 am not going to recom mend the umbrella fo my readers i'he girls of any other ladies' magazine may look like dowdies if they choose, but 1 shonld be sorry to have onr girls look like that. "I've got nothing on tbat will spoil." Yes, yon have, miss. Yoa have yonr complexion. Many a girl has had her complexion ruinod bv a chill. 1 don't refer to the effects of the wind or rain beating in the face that may even do good; bnt to derangement of the func tions of the liver, the stomach, and cir culation. And from a derangement of this sort neglected perhaps often times date very many ruined complex, ions. As to the liver, a chill throws It ont of gear by congesting it with the I blood; for the cold sends the blood i away from the surface of the body, I and it must go somewhere. No serious ' mischief may occur to the liver, but for a time, at all events, it is less able to perform its duties cheerfully, and a Blight degree of biliousness is the ro suit, with lowness of spirits and prob- ' ably dyspepsia. Tbe bile is not prop erly eliminated from the blood. Tbe eye is less clear in some esses it is muddy and the bile lies on the under j skin ot the face; sometimes. Indeed, if yon tighten the skin, say, of the cheek, with the fingers of both hands, before the glass, yon will note that it is not . so white as it was wont to be. j Some antibilions medicine wonld help to remedy this defect, if taken at I once; then the morning cold or tepid tnb, and plenty ef fresh air, wonld carry off all the bad effects Bnt the chill may produce disturb- I ance in circulation, with or withont some degree of indigestion; and this in its turn may canse the disfiguring mis chief commonly known as pimples Why, even one or two of these is suffi cient to spoil the fair face of beauty. Bnt independent of this, some girls have a tendency to acne the doctor's name for this tronhle. ft may be prsdnced from a too watery condition of the j blood, or from indigestion, worry, excitement, etc In such cases the cure must consist in restoring the bal ance of the nervous system, and getting rid of dyspepsia, Sea bathing, if it can be had, has bl excellent action fi r good on the skin and blood, and therefore tends to enre acne. Great care mast bo taken with the diet while dyspepsia lasts. The same kind of food will not suit every one, bnt it may be taken as a general j rule that sloppy food is injurious to people with weak stomachs Even sonp itself had often bettpr be avoided. A little good, tender, solid foo 1 is prefer- able, time of conrse being taken to eat it. But if yoa determine to regulate the diet, your living by rule mast be boldly maintained day after day for many weeks and strict attention given to the rules of hygiene which I have so often laid down. I Those little black specks or dots called by some worms in the face, may sometimes be cured by rubbing in ' every night a little calomel. j When there is anything tbe matter with tbe face, I warn yon to beware of face powders; for if yon clog up the sweat glands, or sebaceous glands a pimple is almost sure to come on. A , cooling face lotion for ordinary purposes may bo made as follows Elderflower , water ek'ht ounces, glycerine water ! one ounce, California borax one ' quarter of an ounce, and a little oil of lavender to suit taste. Cold cream or rose cream are both equally cooling. Now, there ia a trouble called Acne rosacea, and this is really tbe technical term for red nose. All that I have said above concerning the constitution al treatment of pimples holds good in that of red nose. I am sorrv to sav it is often most obstinate, and is fre-! qnently caused by liver ailment. Those ' atHicted in this way mny be much bet- ' ter in fine weather; bnt an east wind or exposure of any kind makes them bad aeain. So does any exce s of diet. This should be restricted, and stimulat ing sauces, or stimulants of any kind, j carefully avoided. I I am sorry I have no panacea fur the t onble. 'lhe redness from the nose sometimes extends over one side of the face. In all bad cases yon onght to put yourself nnder the treatment of yonr family doctor, and the sooner the better. To clear a complexion from "(ruddi ness," an old-fashioned but good rem edy is as follows: To a pint of filtered rain-water add a wineglaseful of lima juice and a few drops of attar of roses. S' ate well. To nse it yon simply damp the face and hands with it, and let it stay on for a few minutes. This may be done three times a day. lhe lotion is a cooling one, easily made, and safe. e "Can't we mount above it?" That was what Nora said to me on the mountain-side. A man wonld hardly I nave thought about such a plan. He would simply have sat down and and smoked. But really I think the sim ple saying, "Can't we mount above it?" is worthy of being remembered. At any rate, in all onr trials, and even sicknesses, it is always best to look A Naval Bishop. A eorrespondent of the ITew York Tribune writes as follows: "The anecdote published In the Tribune the other day respecting the late Ad miral Goldsborough reminds me of an Incident related by his brother, the late Commodore Goldsborough. When the late Commodore Cnauncey, who was chnloric in temper and a strict disciplinarian, was In command of the Brooklyn navy yard, Commodore Goldsborough was a midshipman, and the services of the Episcopal Church were rendered by the chaplain, the Rev. Lot Jones The chaplain an nounced that the rite of confirmation would be administered at a certain date by the bishop of the diocese. The midshipman noticed that Chaun cey's face flushed and swelled during the reading of the notice. After the conclusion of service Commodore Chauncey asked the chaplain, Ey whose authority he presumed to read that notice?' He replied: 'By au thority of the bishop.' Chauncey then said: '1 would have you to understand, sir, that I am the bishop of this chapel.'" It Is often easier for a man to com plete a round of pleasure than it Is for blm to make th'ngs rquare after ward. FANCIES. T GRACE ELLKKT OBINMNO. A tbonand un beams danclns and a thousand Jses slanclni:, a thousand blrd-soncs thrillisiE, trllllni fciadsome o er the law n : Revelry in place of quiet, all a mad midsum mer riot I O Sun, II tnou wert gone! A thsysand hopes sort-singing-, aud a thousand J.vs uispnni:iuK. Anu a thousand, thousand happy dreams like blushing roses red: Throbbing heirt aglow with gladoassi Lift but th- dlvlret madness! O Lova, If thou wert dead I an Attruo IUPK. Casper Corker Say, call, if 1 was g in' ter kill nieself, I'd take mor phine. . Jonas Deadbeat Djn't you never do It. Casper Corker Why not? Jonas Deadbeat A friend o' mine did It onct, an' they found 'lm an walked 'iua ei;ht hours to bring 'im to. NOT THE MAM'S FAULT. 'That man is utterly devoid of feel 1m." "How do vou know?" "He at on my hat and didn't know it until I told hi in." Straw hat, wasn't it?" Yes; but what of that?" '.Nothing, only I thought it couldn't be felt." HIS LITTLE PARADOX. "You are a siiljr, you say?" In quired tbe lawyer, "Ye?, sir." "How long have you Leen a sail or?" "Always," replied the witness proud Iv. "I've been on water ever since I've been ou earth." The Star at floines Will take cold while bmttne. bowling and brows.iiK around t.iw.i. Use lr. Hoxeie'a Cer tain Cionp Cure lor every form of throat and lung IrriLiij.in It ! so subtle In its acllou that it p rmeaien all tie Jjwi.-s ot thl respira tory organ. Sold bv uroiuiimjt druRiOsisoOc. Manufactured by A. P. lloxne, Butlalo, N. . Fidgety Lady' But what am I to do? 1 can't ride w.th my back to the engine." Sarcastic Tout'i -"Better speak to the guaid. He'll turn tbe train axound.'' HEALTH IS HAPITNES3. This saying, however trite, cannot be denied by any one who has ever seen a healthy, rollicking child, and no parent, who deserves the name of parent, but that will take every pre. caution to secure this inestimable blessing for his offspring. In order to do this one most have a knowledge of tho needs and wants and the proper manner of carins r children. Of all the many manuals treating of these Hubjects which we have exam ined, nono can compare with the one issned by Woolrlch Sr Co., Palmer, Muss., cailed "Ridge's Food Trimer.' It shonld be in the hands of every mother in the land, for the proofs are conclusive that if every mother wonld follow its instruction, we should have a race of the most charmingly healthy and happy looking children that one could wi6h to see. Thousands of testimonials from wise mothers who have used Ridge's Food, accompanied by photographs of their children, prove tbe trnth of onr state ment. .Not alone children, but inva lids convalescents and dyspeptics are immensely ben.fited by its nse. In a Kingdom of Africa. Ashantee bv name, a tree refenibllug the English oak grows which bears excellent but ter Cniiii icitfiiey rare nr Dropsy, Oravel, Diabetes, Bright', Heart, Urinary or Liver Diseases, Nerv ousness, 4c. Cure guaranteed. 831 Arch Street, Phi I ad 'a. SI a bottle, for 16, or druggist. 1000 certificate of :nre. Try )u The United states of Columbia con tains more lepers than any other coun try In the world. They number 110,- 0.0. r rarer Axle Greasa. One trial will convince you that It Is the best. Ak your dealer for tiie Frazer Axlo Urease. nd take no oiber. Every box has our trade mark on. The revised German Bible has been completed. For cearly thirty years ctitics and scholars have been at work on it. niipture fiire guarantieei! by Dr. J. B. Mayer, 831 Arch St., Phll'a, 1'a. Ease at once, no operation or de lay from business, attested by thou lauds of cures after others fall, advice free, send for circular. Watts Did your barber shut up on Sunday? Potts No. lie merely closed the shop. F The summer gill asks the same Ques tions at baseball games this season as sbe did last year. The dog that loies his master ia with out a friend, and so are some men when they lose a dog. Mamma "Don't you know that your father is the mainstay of tbe family?" FredJy Golly, ain't he, though! And the apanker, too-" Miss Antique "Won't your mother go with ns?" Miss JRosebud "Xo, sbe says she doesn't think she is old enough to chap eron you, dear.'" "Oh, dear!-' sighed Henry, whose clothes are all made of his pupa's old ones, "papa's had his mustache shaved off. a-i I suppose I've got to wear it now." FITS : AH Fits stopped trea by pr. Kilns breat Nerve Kestorei. No Fits after first day" u-e. Marrrloim cures, x realise and S2.Q0 trla bottle Ire to Fit cases. teTut U) Lir Itlllaa WATChSt.,PullaaelDhJa.f, ' The finest emeralds In the world are said to be those belonging to the Soan ish crown and ihey are all of American origin. Evert Testimonial in befcalf of Hood's Sarsaparllla will bear the closest investigation. No natter where it may be from. It is rel!atle and worthy Jour confidence as If It came 1 fbm your most respected neighbor. Hood's PiUs cure sick Headache. Londoners write 57,511 letters a day requiring thirty gallons of Ink. If afflicted with sore eyes use Dr. Isaac Thomp fon's tye-water.DrUKl.-tt ll atiic per bottle. The value of fur Feal fkins shipped from Alaska since the Territorv came Into the poi-sesslon of the United States is given at 33,000 000. "August Flower" I had been troubled five months with Dyspepsia. I had a fullness after eating, and a heavy load in the pit of my stomach. Sometimes a deathly sickness would overtake me I was working for Thomas McHenry.Druggist, Allegheny City, Pa., in whose employ I had been for seven years. I used August Flower for two weeks. I was relieved of all trouble. I can now eat things I dared not touch before. I have gained twenty pounds since mv re covery. J. D. Cox,AUegbeny, Pa. 9 Simolv Awful ... - - tha Ave- -4 uau " " tors called the wor. nM of Scrofula tliry rreraaw. It wmonmy arms, face and neck aud was simply awrull Five vearsacol betantotake .u..i-. SarsBDarlHaand . i. . uirM crrsdual IOI1IIU 1 11 l.heMntoheal. 1 100" (Inn. W. Turner. ten buttles and was per fectly cured. For the past four years I have had aod health anil no sores." C. vcr f irmer. Galwav, N. Y. . ..i .( r lirnr ills, constipation. biliousness, laimd e. lck headache. JOHNSON'S Anodyne Liniment. THIJTX ef II I AL.OST A GIMM 1. X Rift. Of i l .hM ko it at hand. Emr irsrrwr. tt. '.SiYiilJa to occur to any "no. t,Vsmir.i MONEY SAVED. Little Wife "I saved thirty dollars to-day." , Loving Husband -"You're an angel. How?" Little Wife "I saw a perfectly love ly cav-chair ih it I knew you'd Use, and I didn't buy it." Pure and Wholesome Quality Commends to pnblio approval the California liquid laxitive remedy, Syr np of Figs. It is pleasant to the taste nd by acting gently on the kidneys, liver and bowels to cleanse tha system effectually, it promotes the health and comfort of all who use it, and with millions it is the best and only rem edy. The deepest bole in the world Is bored at Scbladeiiach, Germany. It Is fi3j feet in depth and is for geological re search only. Tnr. evils of malarial disorders, fever, weak ness, lnstltuile and debility and prostration are avoided bv taking Beec ham's Pills. In 100 years $5 0 worth of pennies would be worth only 5250, so quick does copper money wear away. One Cent a rtolt XVatl Paper. Finer. 2s.: Oold Embossed, Ieta.; Solid 'send stamp for lltt Samples. Kekd, Wall Paper Jobber, Rochester, Fa. There have been twenty-seven cases of Insanity in the Bavarian Royal fam ily duilng the list 1UO years. Corn Harvesting Revolutionise,!, nno n,n.n out anil shock, three to Ave acres per itav, easier than one acre In the usual way. Address with stamp. I. Z. MEKKI AM, bite a at-r. Wis. nut nf n 1 ml 1)00 letters that pvs through the post-office only twentr go astray. f T. TirnxfpsnN A- rn. Dnieiilsts. Con- dersport. Pa..' sav Hall's Catarrh Cure is the best and only sine cur for catarrh they er sold. lruKgists sell it, 73c. The cemeteries of Lon.lon cover 2,000 acres and the land they o;cupy repre sents a capital of $1.0)1,000. TRIM ROSES. "A primrose oy tbe river's brim A yellow primrose was to blm. And it was nothing more." The common primrose of England ia loved br tbe conntry people and cel ebrated in song by Knchsh poets as, in the early bpring, thev deck the valleys and tbe hillsides. Tbe children love them and "gather posies of wild thyme and primrose sweet" as they rnn trooping through the meadows. It is. Indeed, the children's own flower and is the symbol of "early yonth." Of the same family, bnt differing in many respects, is the Chinese primrose now so generally cultivated as a win dow plant. A more trusty little plant for producing flowers is seldom seen and one mav have "banks of prim roses" all winter by a little care and tronble. They will bloom in the winter from seed planted in May, but good plants may be proenred" from the florists so cheaply that it hardly seems worth while to bother with rais ingthem from seed. They hke an east window and the temperature kept at 60 or there abouts. They are white, with various shades of pink and Lave a faint, pecul iar fragrance of their own. If one has an old fashioned plantstand with shelves rising one above the other in a semi-circle, there is no arrangement prettier for a primrose bank." Iiave various shades of colors, not forget ting a plant or two of the pretty prim ula Aconica," and you will have a beantifnl garden from December until May with delicate flowers and fresh green leaves. CREATTBES OF HABIT. The following Illustrations taken from Tongiten in Treet and Sermon in Stones, show a sort of intelligence or instinct in plants which wonld never be suspected by those who do not keep careful watch of their peculiarities. Land treated with nitrate of soda yields masses of white clover. Cabbage leaves rise through the night and fall through the day. The compass plant always turns the plane of ita leaf toward the magnetic meridian. The stamens of a verberry touched at the base with a n:n iorV i - - i 1 uciuTieivea irritably forward against the pistil. 1 be rain-tree of Pern sheds aronnd a fine spray of moistnre in the driest air, sometimes falling from its boughs in rain. The pretty garden flaxiaella exhales, an etherio vapor when ita flowers fade which will burst into flame if a candle be brought near. PLANTS EASILY BAI3ED. Flower-lovers who have little time to devote to tbeir gardens sometime get tired with the continual planting and seeding. For tbe benefit of this class. Gardening IlluilraM gives a list of flowers which may be grown from year to year with a minimnm of trouble. The Anemone family give bnt little trouble. Japarese Anemones (white and red) are beantifnl from AuguBt till tbe end of October. Among thines which wul scatter seeds and form col onics in the borders year after year are Wallflowers Forget-me-nots, weet Williams, Pansies, (if the position is partially shaded), Polyanthuses, and various annuals, snch as White and Purple Clarkia, Virginian Stocks. Limmanthes douglasi, Silene com pacts, and Brsnehiug Larkspur. Then IOLaM ?aZ Perennials, Columbines seed freely. Foxgloves also and Antir rhinums, Acanthus nollis Alyssnm sax atile compacum. Anchnsa italic Arabia albida. Delphinium formtv-nm Dielytra spectabilis. Dictamnus Fraxil nella, Galega officinalis, Geranium pretense. Gypsophila VS? Genm coccinenm. Harpalium rigidum Hypericum calvoinnm. and Ks sempervirens are all useful plantafor those who have bnt little time for St??V T.h? Chtms Rose? LUy of the A alley. Linaria biennis, Pm,niel both annnal and perennial ?K toOUthen lis?6 ..PflBOn"e8i mS be added to the hst, as may also Sternbenria JJaffodiL Snowdrops, Smllas, Aconites. Crown Imperials, Yuccas and the Pampas Graas, .Lonld bTinolndedT HtJMonous. MANX or HIS KIND. Qester-So that thler you were tell ing me of escape i after all , eh? SeTSdn'tyoanar the wtch man startel to run him oown. 01 Jester-Yes. but in the eff Jj"? down himself; a short-wind w"J". you see. AX APPROPRIATE SAUK, Dukane-Beg pardon, 3fni.ert w..at name as tbat you called yonr WlLaK-I?called her "Revised D.c- ""Tsna that rather an odd name to applv to the wire of your boBomJ Xo: at all. You s e she al waj has the last word." A BEGrXAB DILEMMA. A. 1 am in a hideous pickle. B. -Howso? f aat A I have not goi uy"u " - and the only thing I've got to pawn Is " .... if t nawn them and my iaiao " - r T .n't t buy something to ea mmi - -ir, I never was in such a hideous fix in an my me. AT THE COUNTRY DRPG STORE. Drug Clerk (to sceptical customer) You need need not be afraid that I shll make any mistake. I am too careful to do so. It I End that I do not understand a prescription I invar iably put up a little mixture of my own of plain seta, chalk, aud lemon Juice which ia harmless. HE COULD BE H' ARTLES3, TOO. He I aaa going to have my life in sured. She What f rF . He What for? Why, suppose I should die; what wonld you do? She (heartlessly) -Marry again. He (calmly) ot unless my life haa been heavily Insured. PRECISELY. Featherstone You get all your clothes made in London, don't your How do you continue to have them Rlngway They don't fit. That's wh&t makes them louk so Eugllsh. didn't agree Melton Arn't you living In the same apartment with Baugle? Beaver No. We had a disagree ment and I moved. "What was the trouble?" "He grew so stout that I cou'dn't wear bis clothes." A NATURAL SUPPOSITION'. Mr. Tulkinghorn There is a very fine picture of our minister in to-day's paper. Mrs. Tulki'ghorn Indeed! What has he keen cured off Ma EES ITSOWS TROUBLE. "That's a mighty poor circular on have to adveitise your eye-wash. " "Why?" "It la so illegible it gives a man sore etes to lead 1L" "Well, Isn't that good for the eye wash?" Are any of the new-fangled washing com pounds as good as the old-fashioned soup? Uobbins' Electric Soap has bten sold everv day tor 24 years, and is now u-.t as good as ever. Ask your grocer fnf It aud laks no other. November 9 next will be the twen tieth anniversary of Boston's great fire. The Ore destroyed over 1100,000,000 wo:th of propei ty. Mr. Rudolph Krlede, Superior, Wis., writes, I havo tried the 9c Bernard Vegetable Pills received from you some time ago. My wife pronounces them tbe best remedy sbe has ever used for remale disorders. Please accept my , thanks. Tour letter of the lTth ult., was duiy j roc Ived and should hare replied ere this, but I wanted my wife's opinion before answeiirur. I am well satisfied and enclose $1 75 lor which piease send me ono dozen ooxea. The region about the Dead sea is one of tbe hot :o -t places on tbe elobe. and tbe sea is said to lose a million tons of water a day by evaporation. 107 dp. k i cpr a Kidney, Liver and Bladder Curi RhcumaUsiii. Vrlnta Joints or back, brick dustta . urine, frequent caua. irritation. In nam at Ion. ) ravel, ulceration or catarrh of Wadded ' Disordered Liver, sTAiTon'r' fc. WJIlous-headaoha, Impure Blood. Bcrof u!a, malaria, seal weakness oxdebliltW At Droggl.t., Oc. Sl.e, tl.00 Size. nnralkW Ould. to Hlth-W-ioatttltall. Da. Kun Co, BtMvuZmZ ST t I wao have waak lung or AMa- Ima, mould um rtjo , Cars for Consumption. It has ear a IksnsaSh ft has not Inlnr- I one. n is not bad to t.i. It Is lbs bast cough srrap. ckjiu vTerrwner. a &e. -I4.IJHH.'ldJI. U3 R - nj suiCsS. eha.in. v laef TPr- TAKK KO SCBSTITCTK. W iSti ,z,.- costing from Sd fh.;r I V .BlWm SMW SBBBBBW IH SMSB SaM B . ASK FOR W I nnimi so. J"ii?r5otl7lM',,',n,oan'1t''eF-l'estan,icdoBbottm. R rurt W. a. DOUGLAS' Sllflre SuchsnbsUtutlons arefnnrtnl.t eH ,lLct to oroMCO- tr r . for nltji TQWT Blaaa nmmH AilZ obtaluinu money under false pretences. Write rr Catal.aa. W, BuU, BrJcktea, W. rnoliDT BE CjrEIVJO t-m&CA Willi l':i-'5t''. K:-;i';i. ain 1 -ms 11ct ttMn lii. 1' in Ini'T the Iro". anil ti-.:i up. Tin- Kmlmtf'in fcu've r"mh 1 ir.Uisnt.Cfln. trv Iunii.i.a.-'d lhe i-m.ii,ii,er F i0r m, tin or"ielaspakaeriU..ry iurlu.. " MALARIA. Whole llbrnr'ps hive nocn urn' n ,v Malaiiaand nia!ari;il l:.-:i. a l.y n-e p,rnM men of ail tuitions, liuw far Mi. phyivs, niav olTi-r fr. in amiti'v in 1 1 n. on, 0 other ulij'-cts, tl ey all icr.e- on Hi s tti n ti, at ot M.ilaiKi is in the liio.nl ai,, Hi.it ,t liciiliiriy affects 'he mill. M.r.ir i,.nv rucur anvwlifie; bit it Is epicalij ii'v.;!(-iit in damp anil low lin i j::.iis v.im i..-;,vy sru Ir pre r very seldom 1" m.i . r .1 Kur. ,- hui It prevails in North aiii-th a ' nli.u aiiiitio a nil Soiii h America pari Iculai iy in surh pan, of this continent which u ivu a mom nn warm climate. Malaria Is put a eoiitau.,,,,, disease in the 11su.1l acceptation ol tne term Even In tho-e countries in winch It appears t0' an en lennc form it can lie irnauieil auaint hv a rational nioiie ot llvini atiJ the ousrvuncs of lhe most Con 11 rules of health An, ono these the luict im: otiant are moderation in ratinz and riuko-ic ami awi'dme the Umu night-air. One of the niot lintiortani e .n.in.,,n, fo. the preservation of tp altn is i-rt. rt a jj-v tlun aud in connei 1 !ai w 1U1 th s a tree e.re 1 11D of the blotet ami t r.ipnl iinr.vai of an waste matter innii ;! l-'!v. The enl-ivern-nt of the Inlil wli h isin.iir il in all in.iiini ill, eases and wl leii in oo-tioate c is-s heciim! lianleninK of lhe. spl -n. proves nh .i. ii itly that the principal cause of ti,e ! se.i.e ,s to t found in the (act that I h- b'oo I no- s not c ru late as freelv and easily a it uncut. To ra.se the blood to circulate as fiee an 1 enny KJ possible and to keep tlie lutes' ml cirai , constant and liealihiiil activity no ttr.r remeitv Is known llian the M. Imai'l Vepeta ble fills, prepared from tiie I.eM mert clnal herbs ol the Alps. Ho y cm he nht.i tied at 26 cm. a box f 1 0111 eve.y first c:ss dm.-.- t. your druiitc sis haven't them in .!. -,.;iri ;--t to -St. Bernard'' II. m "16 .New Voiki. lv and ?on wll rec r.esonie post pat.l l.y tetiira null, very caref.il father a-s as n-rv .1: e at tl.s Bead 01 an enncaioii.c u ..1 on s- 1 ! ... them 111 lhe house. so that m ,y Pe ah e tu aivethemto the p.vient as soon a- tie- iei.i snrns of tieneral utdisios lion or :ri i'-'err::p. tion In the circ.ilatio 1 of til" lir lm- .ci. Tho ptl s act as a 't'.d i.ixlt utei l. ;.,i. fler and remove the ir.al.ii Ul po.- u Ir jiu la body wilho'-it eakt'iiiii it. AN-AKF-T-i rr , it.-mt ri'ii-t ti ia INFALLIBLE CC8B 1 T FTI.KS. Prl?M '.;m mmzL'tsts', or bv null. K Illp'.es Ail4rM "Afal-esis." Box itii Jcw Vork CUy. 0 ThlJTr-1" Jr.srS Is eti t' b- WATERPROOF COAT IHniitratetl In the WorU ! (rftUOgUt A. J. TO'.'."?. ETi'Tpr,' VAsj, FOR FIFTY YEARS 1 MRS. WINSLOW'S SOOTHING SYRUP has been TJed hr Millions of Inihers for their rtilj iri-n w...e 1 ui. j i r . .. r FiftV Years. It soothes tl cii.: t. -.!-- rn irunis, allays all pa:n. euros wii.d c-ii, mid is toe test remedy for dlurrh.i-a, Tweaty-five Cents a linttle. wpiti' For ciiit ri-Aiu Ail.lres, Eroa'lw.ir nntl I5.nvl.iy, Wc Pay a.".t van leiv 1 I.tfe Ins;;iance nriv ;.. you wsii t K 1; o ! 1 ' lor "tUi'i AND Wii l', the 1 -hot It ti. snil .,.1 IT rost- pen;, mutual life 921-23-5 CHESTXfT STREET, rhttaileTp!, ,. ra. WORN NIGHT AND DAY. V T A 5 T 1 TTS' Hire win e ,se un ier fc J. A. ST I O .Hoc -m-'ances Ivr- X ROSS Jr . f.-rt .i'ii-f.i m fort.tn leu.... NewPa- ,J ie -! i I 'I .0 einerns. ll!ii-;i c naler: aii.l tt:"'s ?er e.f- imniuci r,,.lv y HOXT SEMro.CO..:4ir.n..t.:"!j-.N- Yorkfitr- ED AXLE r"S a UllbHUh BEST IV TUP W'llKT.D. Irs srpnrl"? q.;. 1 " ':- -e: l. aematfy ontlastlnit Ihrt-f ' - - " ' i .:. 1 s a aflecledhyt. ,-. 1 .' (.I T I II I t;i:LIXC. FOR Sii.i n i 1 .; . r :: sui.S. 1DNEYS and LIVER LI Toall aftl-.-i-t w- tT r . ur IioiiK ON IIhOIIK lilt liMI.M I lltt. F CH tKIIF. A.'.iv '-s K AND L REMEDY CO., Box 837, - IVoria. I I, Please state n-a.it r il r y -i c-nv :.;;r iJv-r-tlsement In. J" V 'pflNS T HU L fi 7- ; J Js-V e.VrOv iLe m'si. P-e .sf. nn.l .-f 5i sA f -.e.-'sl. Ct' i --t .'.1.. rl fhirilTs JfAf lonllpU 'n t't'',-:. SXtefr Breath. fces.mrbe. f snt. Vjy4t5r" of Sp.l te. M- n'il D, t're-.i.'n iUSr Isnii'Jl lMw-..lc.'i. lint.-s. -Jl.'w Oon-pieti-a, ll.v.1 t--i.. ana frearr trtnrtom or u-essj re.ie.; u f".eu en ur J blood, n'ratsilure bT ib -tcin-h. llvrr cr irt.-'.m J Jto perforru fhe.r rr'ter lncTl tu I' r. i?fi t, . 5oTerssmlnffsrebeDflteHt y tal-r.s T s lit I I ""f mc-hmnll Pi-tee, CT aisil I cr.-- : 1 ''' ' e . Al dress TUt RIPASSCH 1 MI.-At..t"'-frue,!t VT.l ArfUI. Ksntisll I 11.11 11 m-r eol prill- ySTCFPED. fHEE VDr. KI.INK S('H!-"AT rVCpvF PFCTOEB L-ar-s ror A'mi A rfrr p a. rl. Hi. ('srAlLlK If Ukrn as i1:r-tr.l. .So i ' t iai u Trs--i c .i J r'', t i Fu raitcota, ihw nit:ii. e;-r liar.-f - o.. b rt. r ( immre. I . C t in- 1 , mictt to UK. K1.1N!.. '..' i At;. i . t In r .'Tt SOUTH DAKOTA FARMLANDS Inv9toM as a nTTn,r' of 'airU 'n Dakota wt.I find U ro th.r int rt m write. J. S. IinVlN, Blunt, south PaV: OUQL W SM vt GENT hhu r lUiaBVSjadBtarssiijia. iiiS 3saaa-al R1TC II G S U AS ' FOR THE BEST SHOE IN! THE V3SLDFC3 TIIE nnCV ttlU.lil. S..!-.!PS, , th&a Weiibie, more co.nfortab!p.yns:i ami d s,.w4u at we prica, .oaali ci t to $5, 1 HanduMvea, f!o calf .tines. Ts n-.t :tT'!. BnahnTJ aWebl'00' uver 61,111 at uit-bo prices, lasr-orted shoes cnst.,ig from 3 to l 12. S3a ..'e !,'', wora by farmers and all s wa&t a anmi ......, i . . Tie- J e-l"" ! otVt' -.on tiib . tho, lumen's Sf nef Bulv,w.n esriorilio nioneytnan anv ot uer mea i-."' kpp t!i S2a wiii'il'.iJ' ,f' -- V. orkiMi,., toMhfoundtbtaS5t.,1,e lDCreu"li al0. show that t.ura BOYS "i1 Vontti School Phoes rs J7 " .T, J'orn by the boya averj whero. 1 Ho iuol void able shoes sold at these prices. LAniP R 3 llaoil-Sewed. S3 an.1 , -phots tor i1lica ure tiauoot the tcst iJen' aoiaor fine Calf, as riei-i..! t u ...noie.ch com fortable and durable. The $3 sane equals ciiiiom mada hoea costing from 1 to $5, Ladies wLovrLsh toeoono-