n
1 ' 1"
ill
D. F. SCIIWEIER,
THE GOJfSTITTJTIOS TEE TOIOS-AID THE EHTOECEMEST OF THE LAWS.
Editor and Proprietor.
VOL. XXXIII.
MIFFLINTOWX, JUNIATA COUNTY, PENNA.. WEDNESDAY, APRIL 9, 1879.
NO. 15.
H. T. HELMBOLD'S
COMPOUND
FLUID EXTRACT
BUCHU
PHARMACEUTICAL.
A SPECIFIC REMEDY FOR ALL
DISEASES
or THE
For PeWlitT. Loss of Memory. Indlwnosl
. tlon to Exertion or Bti-inee, Shortness of
Breath. Troubled with Tnoughls of Dii,
Dimwwsf Vision, Pfcin in the Back. Curst,
and H-1. Ensb of Blood to the Head, Pile
Oonntenance. and lry ixt.
If these yaitoiu are allowed to go on,
verv rreuentlT Epileptic Fits ant Con.
m nipt ion follow, Vvtion the constitution
become affected it requires the aul of an
lnxl(foraiiijr medicine to strengthen and
tone up the system which
"Helmbold's Buchu
1 1
DOES IN EVERY CASE.-
IS TJNEQTJAXXD
Ft anv remedT known. It Is prescribed bv
the most eminent physician ail over the
world. In
Rheumatism.
Spermatorrhoea,
Neuralgia,
Nervousness,
Dyspepsia,
Indigestion,
Constipation,
Ache and Pains,
General Debility,
Kidney Diseases,
Liver Complaint,
Xervous Debility,
Epilepsy,
Head Trouble,
Paralysis,
General Ill-Health.
Spinal Diseases,
Sciatica.
Deafness,
Decline,"
Lumbago,
Catarrh.
Nervous Complaints,
Temale Complaints, etc.
it i. t. I. tha Tnnnliini- Conjrtl.
P1iines Sour Ktotnach, trnptioms Ba
Taste In the Month. Palpitation i of the
H.-art. Pain In the region of the W"f
and a thousand other painful symptoms,
are the off-pilugs of Dyspepsia.
Helmbold's Buchu
Invigorates tbe Stomach,
And stimulates the torpid LJver, Bowels,
ind IK xlneys to healthy action. In clean, ng
the blood of all impurities, and Imparting
. : . l 4...... , tl. vtlOle SVSt4m.
A single triMT w ill be quite sufficient to
eoiiviuce the most hesitating of Its valuable
remedial qualities.
PKICE 1 PER BOTTLE
Or Six Bottle for S5
ivilvered to any address free from obscrra-
' -d. ......... .oonltbv letter, recelv-
lne the same attention as by calling,
answering tbe following questions.
. - .nil nrrtxfBce address.
eonntv and State, and your nearest express
office T .
i. Toor are and sex T
a. Occupation?
4. .MairiloTslnKlet
A Ib-UchL, weijilit, now and In health!
5. How long nave , , . T. -H ,Mt
7 v.,iirrouiDl-xion.colorof hair and eyesr
. llHve you a stooping or erect gait .
.. ...... ..t.i.n.. rwrvfLtlon all you
a-consultntion f.-e. Vonr letter will then
r,-c tve our attention. ant we will le
the nature of your disease and our candid
opin ion concerning a cure. -rrt.
Competent Physicians attend W eorres.
pon.lenta. All letteis sliouia "TTr,
to Ii,-natory, 1x17 Filbert treet, Phili
tlelpbia, Pa.
H. T. HELM BOLD,
Druggist and Chemist,
Philadelphia, Pa.
THE:mAGmsTms
I give the back tha ring tbon gav'st
With word of lore ao fondly amid.
And Towa which in a trotting heart
Awakened bopea now crushed and dead.
I deemed thee noble, kind, and true.
With honest heart as pare a gold ;
But I bare found 'twas not thyself
I loved a man of rixcr a mould !
Take back thy gift : 'tis now to ma
A worthless, desecrated thing !
Since I have learned the faith'ts-neae
Of him who gave tha Jeweled ring.
Yes take it back ! I acorn to wear
Thia emblem of thy vain deceit ! '
I bate, despise, and lothe it ! See
I fling tha banhle at thy feet.
I've given it beck, and every tie
That aver bound my heart to thee
I severed. Tea, with joy I Bud
Thy chains from off mj soul I'm free I
Botrding-House Ixperiencei in Washington,
At an earlv ae, owing to the force of
circumstances and the pursuit of knowleile,
I became an inmate of one of those numer
ous mansions which form the connecting
link between a hotel and a private residence,
vet which generallv possess neither the
comfort of the latter, nor the independence
of the former, style of living.
The personal appearance of professional
boarding-house keepers is usually one of two
sorts ; the commonest being lean and angu
lar, with a decidedly vinegarih expression
of countenance ; the face, ornamented with
a long and dangerously sharp nose, and
oftiuH-s a pair of spectacles. A faded black
dress is the usual uniform, anil, as they are
seldom seen in anv other, one liecnmes im
pressed with the idea, that they never take
It off, and that, if they ever leave tins world,
thev will die and be buried in it. A mourn
ful expression of countenance is often as
sumed, which takes well with innocent
young men of a serious turn 01 nnno. as
well as with sedate elderly gentlemen;
their scale of prices likewise rise, as their
eres au conversation ascend heavenward.
The second variety is exactly the reverse
of this being more like a femaJe edition
of the bvgone "Boniface." A fair, fat and
forty matron ; in general, a good provider,
and kind, withal ; as good nature and cn
bonvoint usually go together. To be sure.
herblress is not always of the cleanest, and
her breath doubt leas smells ol oimons ; Din,
ten to one. she is a motherly old soul, and
will care for vou if vou are ill without
thought as to your ability to pay her while
out of work. On the whole, llierelore, it
is generally safe (in these rcs-ct) to choose
a fat landlady.
These varieties do not refer, of course, to
fashionable bouses, but to the middle, and
bv far the largest class, patronized by single
men of ordinary means.
When a small lad I was sent to a ci-le-
rated school, a lone distance froui the city
in which my parents resided, and domiciled
at the house of a Mrs. McYiekar, whose
sign, as hard and rustv looking as herself,
gave notice to the passing public that pro
viding lor the temporal ueeusoi single gi-u-
tlemen. was her present occupation.
Mrs. Mc ickar was the relict or a cier
vman of the place, and consequently stood
high in position, according to rural courtesy:
she thus obtained like many another in
higher walks of life, resjiect, not on her
own account, but through the merits of the
dead. She was stern, uncompromising,
and childless, possessing through life pro
bably little of the milk of human kindness.
During the three years passed with the
widow of the unfortunate McVickar, I was
so often reminded of the worthlessness of
children, that I wondered what they were
made for, or why they were not born already
"crown up,' like our first parents. 1 heir
gormandizing habits were ever being com
mented on in my hearing, and, though
talked at for eating so much, I was still
forbidden to leave anything on my plate.
failed to see the justice of treating one
boarder, whose bills were regularly paid,
differently from an other, simply because
be measured a foot or so less in height.
The others were not obliged to eat fat ; they
could ask for food a second time, and were
helped to dessert; these privileges were
either denied me, or else so disagreeably
liestowed as to make them scarcely desira
ble. Being thus kept on short commons,
my notions concerning the difference of
1,1,11m and teum became somewhat weak
ened, as my occasional visits to unguarded
cupboards and fruit orcuaws couiu iesuiy.
Sir visits home wing uui seuu-yeariT,
my Sundays were likewise spent with this
"rim guardian, who thus had charge of my
spiritual as well as my temporal welfare,
she heine doubtleas possessed of some un
known Qualities which made her equally a
It director for the aouls as for the stomachs
of mime nersons. She was a strict Caivan
ist, a firm believer in preumnnmtm,
her religion too sacred an article to be used
on ordinary occasions; was consequent
kept carefully bottled up during the week.
to lie opened on punuays, wuen n on
flowed like a bottle of root-beer when the
cork is drawn. Those were days of mar
tyrdom for me, longer by far than the
longest day at school, as after attending
"meeting in the morning, prcceueu uy
catechism, I was forced to remain perched
on a chair by far too high for me, with a
bible or some good book wherein the fate of
some sinnil youth who, like myself, pos
sessed a fondness for green apples, ana nav-
no fear of God m a Mrs. .McV icKar
before bis eyes, procured some of the for
bidden fruit from a neighbors on hard, and
broke his neck and the Sabbath at the same
time. On the other side was set forth tlie
example of a model chap, who ate what was
set liefore him, and made no remarks if the
meat was all fat, or tne uasn nan a uair in
it ; who never asked to be helped twice, but
who pimislv insisted on going to church in
. ' . u .! . 1 ...1 KAfun,,, an
a snow-storm, sa com, ....... -
angel the following week.
it hard for me to discover the advan-
taces of the latter over the former ; the first
evidently bad the best time on earth, and by
m.- i.ml'landv's creed, the future was al-
readr decided. I soon learned to amuse
mvs-lf bv making puzzles out of the Ion;
;,ia on mv book, and became quite pro
ficient in constructing anagrams, while my
-rriin guardian nodded over her bible, think
ing me perusing for the twentieth time the
affecting tract of the "Dairy.nan'y Daugh
ter.
During my college days my Alma Mater
proved another Mrs. Mc icker w lar as
bodily food was eonearnad. Jdeed, most
of the practical effusmns addressed to the
old dame by her children should 1 received
with several grain, of salt ; the said I mater
lieing often a mere stepmother, and a sorry
nTl 'students were mostly affected with a
nl loose coats strangeiy
Tl ifa.Ii m it n j -- . i
run to pockets in,,wn'cV"f TZffiZ
articles of diet at illegal hours. J
that required no cookiuk "."' "-n.
for; sardines canned fruits, ystV!.
aterk, etc Such dietwas also PI
mntain a large proportion of brain nourish -
meat and comwrcenUy the tnmg. vxaca-
huge sheep-bound tome (at least it had tha
appearance of one) supplied us with an an
tidote in case our feasts disagreed with our
iiternal economy
As I think of nose scoxa. &, can see
n my mind's eve the long and cheerless re
fectory, filled with hungry youths. From
what I hear the diet has not improved, and
the same roast for Sunday's, with vegeta
ble and rice pudding, is still in order.
Monday's table as hare as a wash-day din
ner in a poor family and a "square meal"
not given till Friday, which day was de
voted to the finny trilie. Saturday, a din
ner of all sorts, a rehash of the week, en
abling one to appreciate by contrast the
plain but substantial fart the following day.
On going into the world, I boarded among
other places at the home of a widow who
rejoiced in me appropriate name of Stiutem.
"Terms invariably in auvance. 2so lathi's.
children or dogs admitted." That is only
unprotected single gentlemen were taken in
and done for at thia model establishment.
Mrs. Stinti-m, like Lady Maclieth, pre
served her dignity and presence of mind on
all occasions, anil under the most trying
circumstances. She were astonishing caps.
and her "make-up" was apparently copied
from some long-forgfrtfn fashion in the
"I-adies Book." Her dignity, as I have
before stated, was profmiiHt, and of such a
practical nature, that few of her five-and-twenty
boarders wmild have (hired to utter
a remonstrance, had their meals failed to
appear for a week. A look was generally
enough to awe the most rebellious to silence.
Her table was bountifully supplied with
linen, glass and silver ware. Tc were
waited on by sable male attendants arrayed
in spotless white, while the food (what
there was of it) was cooked in the most
i ..,.1 ..,,.... I.. f .cl..
r r rr:;; :, ..b ,:w:.icate,iwith u,e adjoining Mim.
plate resembled an old hen with a brood of
chickens around her. Notwithstanding the
increased outlay in crockery, it was an
economical arrangement, for so little was
served in the dishes tlutt the boarders arose
from the table with the assurance of having
followed Franklin's advice, and lett the
table with an appetite. We could not well
r i .1 u of i 1
of food ; the pile of plates
mid seem to give the' lie to
complain of lack
emptied by us wc
sucb an assertion.
Mv next landlady was noted for having!
soothed the dying pillow ol three liuslan.ls
and was supposed to 1 anxiously waiting
a f Hymen's torch to enkindle the flame b
or fourth sacrifice to her charms. Her
worldly estate r having increased with
her providers she was fi need to resort to
the method of earning a living so often re
sorted to by ladies in dinicullies.
I had dexterously managed to procure a
seat next to hers at the table, as past ex-
perienee has tanjrht me the advantage of
this position ; a little attention towanls the ;
presiding genius of the house, who ruli her j
fellow creatures through tlie medium of
their stomachs goes a great ways in tli-se
modem caravansaries. The bread I thus
cast upon the waters, was returned to me
in the shape of hot cakes and tea of uiidi-
luted strength whenever I was late ul r. y
meals a favor not accorded to many uud'T
such circumstances. folding doors stood oen ami that the luck
But I fell into disgrace at hurt. My mat-1 mom was used as a bed-chamlHT, by my
tress feelins unusually hard even for a ' host ; indent, his wife was then busily en
boarding house article, I examined it. and, i gaged in some mystery of the toilette. Ile
by the aid of my penknife, removed several j treating to the dining-room, I found it in
good sized corn"cols which the upholsterer j darkness and evidently not to lie used till
had not deemed necessary to renntve. For morning. Intercepting the servant who
this wanton ih-struction of pmierty, I h-st was alxmt leaving the house, I made known
my post of honor and its pnvil
ires
and.
shortly after found another home. I kept
one of the cobs however, converting it into
a nioe. which I smoked in memory of my
injured landlady. I
After some months, dnrinir which time I
had experienced a lew chances l lounu
myself partaking ot my daily bread at the
house of a Mrs. aManiL It was by no means
a first-class establishment ; I was nut pre
pared to seek the best, yet the change was
for the better, from the elegant starvation
at Mrs. Stintem'B to the excessive prodiiral
ity at Mrs. B's. There was plenty of food,
coarse, but ckan, linen, fat cooking and a
fat landlady.
Everything seemed to run to fatness the
favorite method of cooking being "frying,"
piles of liecf cut in slices the thickness of
paste board were set swimming in a sea of
melted lard, where they were cooked to a
toughness that would have disgusted an os
trich. This formed the lwisis of every meal,
and they were so nearly alike that lull for
the time of day 1 could not have told
whether it was supper, dinner or breakfast
I was eating.
My excessive delicacy caused me to leave
the house of this worthy lady. One day at
dinner desiring a fork to assist myself to a
piece of the alwve mentioned delicacy, my
landlady, with the air of a dutehess after
removing the superfluous gravy- from hers
by means of her lips presented it to me ;
aiid on assuring her that I could not think
of depriving her of so useful an instrument
would have forced me to accept it had I not
sought refuge by flight.
My next trial proved successful as far as
table accommodations were concerned, and,
had I fared as well by night as by day, all
would have been well ; as it was I was so
afflicted by those little pests which natural
ists (with their fondness for long names)
style ffwicx Irrtuluriun, that I nightly
dreamed of "Saint Lawrence and his grid
iron." After lieing phleliotomized as long
as mv constitution would liear it, I engaged
hoard At the house of an Irish tailor for a
few weeks or until such time as a room I
had engag-d could be made ready for me.
Michael Dennison lived pretty well w hen
trade was oood. or. to use his own technical
phrase, when the "goose was hot ami call
age plenty, liut tne goose ouen uung
bi.rh and cold in the shop, and as that use
ful bird tar nt tu. the fare came down, it
was a change, however, and the cooking
was passable with the exception of the cof
fee and tea: but as my ht was a great
lover of malt liquors 1 made up in good ale
what I lost in more temperate beverages.
Michael was generally "half seas over" by
bed time, when trade was good ; and at
such times became unusually pious and
would insist on whispering spiritual conso-
ation intol my ear which was any tiling but
aree3ible.
Owing to sickness in his family 1 leil my
comical host, with more regret than 1 had
left more pretentious places and took fur
nished appartments in a "genteel family"
who kept no lioarders procuring meals at
restaurants. Having added a few articles
of furniture, my room room soon had a very
comfortable appearance. To ! sure, there
were some little troubles at first, but I soon
corrected them. For instance, the snap,
after the manner of the lodging-house article
had a tendency to slip through my hands as
, r :i: . 1 :
if resenting sucn lanuuuniy ; m urn
slipped out of the window, 'where I left it,
and procured some of another kind.
The bureau-drawers also had a decided
objection to closing, and, when closed, to
open again without endangering the whole
structure; but a little patience and sweet
oil soon remedied this difficulty also.
But. alas ! there was a d.iset in my room
and it is said that every closet contains a
' skeleton ; the key of mine I carried in my
. r kept several valuables as well
refreshments therein. 1 was tnereior,
iUrnried to find, one evening that some
'Xown party had abstracted a half bottle
1 . . . - . it
om) of tbe wrTlnU wa.
he culprit, I said nothing, but procured a
patent lock in place of the common affair
already on the door, and chuckled to myself
over the disappointment Bridget would ex
perience should she again attempt to take a
drink at my expense.
A week after I was surprised by a similar
visit ; none of the solids had been disturbed
but some wine was missing.
"It must be a cunning wench who can
pick that lock," I thought to myself. "1
must interview the lass."
I did so, but could detect nothing sus
picious by the most careful cross-questioning.
Every day something of the kind was
taken; I made sure of the fact by marking
the position of the bottles and the height of
their contents. - . .
I felt piqued. I did not begrudge fur
nishing my unknown guest with refresh
ments so much as being outwitted ; so, to
let the thief know I was aware of their
depred:dions I arranged a trap so that in
opening the door a board would fall and
break a glass.
Uobinson Crusoe was no more astonished
at beholding the foot-prints in the sand,
than I was when, on my return and tpriny
ing m;t own trap, I discovered that the
best part of a liottle of Concord wine had
been appropriated bv my mysterious visitor.
"The deuce," I ejaculated. "There
must be thirsty chosts in the house."
While g:izing In astonishment at my
emptied bottles; I noticed a crack in the
wall between the shelves the figure of the
paper with which it was covered having
hid it before. I examim-d it more closely,
and found the liack of the closet to be a
wooden partition and that a small window,
such as are often found in china closets had
lonm
formerly existed, and probably commum-
1 after
wards found that my visitor was no less a
person than my landlord, who had an un
fortunate fondness for strong waters.
Disapproving ol such a romantic style of
communication with my bed-room, I soon
left the house and was recommended to
that of one Deacon Ilappvi who, I was
told, merely took a few lioarders "for com
PnVs sake," as his family consisted but of
' . - V ., . - .
'"" aud 1 j"1" '"f ' TT
ica, I found the family at dinner, and, de-
spite my protestations I
was forced to
I might know
remain and partake, that
lat rt of fare to expect should I become
.,).-. pn.t." I found it so good that
I, ie j.n waa brought in I hail
d.j,ied to make one of their festive board ;
the terms bemg agreed on, I arranged
to send my things the next day, my ht
assuring tne that I would have the "com
forts of a Christian family," and that he
left not a stone unturned to rendtT his
lioarders pleased and contented. He dwelt
considerably on this point, seeming to con
sider it his duty as a deacon, to keep young
men by these means from the temptations
tlu-y iniulit otherwise lie exposed to; and I
fondly imagined that I h:ul at last found the
nr phi ultra" of lioarding houses.
I moved there the next ilav, and. having
gone out afu-r dinner, returned, tired and
overheated from a long walk; lieing aliout
to enter the parlor, I ticrccived that the
my wants.
""'Deol, sir," she replied, "de gemmen
alius sets in dere rooms or on dc steps ; d
missus has de parlors to herself.
isui my room is too suiay anu warm.
n'' '' sllinM! ot out on tUe sU'ls" 1
replied.
"Dat's so, sir; but you kin set here in de
hall ; only you mtis'nl use tobacco, de dea
con won't allow daL"
"Confound the deacon!" I exclaimed.
"Get me a glass of water, and here's a dime
for your trouble."
"Deed I can't, sah; de ice all done
melted ; dere's a hydrant in dc back yard
though. I'se in a hurry, I is to get home.
Good-evening, sail," and, so saying, this
home-loving maid of all work, departed.
After nearly breaking my neck in the
unfamiliar regions of the back yard I found
some undriukable water, thence to a neigh
boring restaurant where I procurred a more
refreshing beverage and sat reading the
patters till bed-time.
1 he next day 1 politely stated tne lacts
to my host, supposing that there was some
mistake, but, to my surprise, was brusquely
informed tliat if his house did no suit, I
could leave. "His was a quiet Clinstian
home. I liad my room to sit in like the
others. He fed and lodged his guests and
praved for their spiritual welfare; that was
all he engaged t) ! ; but he would rent i
me a cooler room for fifteen dollars addi
tional." But I cannot afford tliat, sir, neither
can I see to read on the steps after dark."
"That is none of my affair; I offer you
the advantages of a Christian
"Christian fiddlesticks! I abruptly re
torted. "It is such Christians as you, sir,
that send young men to the devil, compel
ling them to resort to the streets lor company
and recreation."
"That is none of my busiaess he re
peated. "And," coutinued this exemplary
host, "I will thank you to refrain from
using profane language in my presence.
"Seeing that you have so much respect
for his Satanic majesty, may ha send you
your next lswdiT," I replied, and thongh
late in the day, I immediately packed my
trunk and took refuge in a hotel where I
intend to remain until I give up boarding
altogether and have a home of my own.
plague Preeautlona.
The plague fright at Berlin has recallad
the extraordinary precautions taken durinjf
the cholera epidemic of 1831. A cord wa
drawn in front of houses supposed to be
infected. The keys were given to a police
agent, who three or four times a day went
to see what the inmates wanted, lie then
placed what he brought them on a table
outside, near tlie door. The money was
put into a glass full of vinegar, and the
agent took it out with a spoon. The paper
on which tne commissions were wniieu
down he took up with pincers. When a
sick person was taken to the hospital
police agent preceded the vehicle with a
iielL and two soldiers Kept every one away
from the sick person. The doctors wore
cloaks and masks of oil-cloth. The skin of
docs and cats being deemed particularly
favorable to the dissemination of the dis
ease, persons were recommended to kill
them, except where they were positively
nn-pwiiiT. For months the inhabitants
lived in trepidation, and an old lady actu
ally hanged herself for fear of the cholera
reaching her. The precautions gradually
became matters for ridicule.
Work logmen.
Before you begin your heavy spring
work after a w inter of relaxation, your
system needs cleansing and strength
ening to prevent an attack or Agus
Bilious or Spring Fever, or some
other Spring sickness that will unfit
vou for a season's work. You will
save time, much sickness and great ex
pense if you will use one bottle of Hop
Bitters in your family this month.
Don't wait.
See another column.
of Women la
The Golden Rule: "Do ye unto
others as ye would that others should
do unto you," often shortened to the
homely phrase: "Do as you would be
done by,'' displays in great prominence
the fact in human nature, that what
ever we require we are nuder certain
obligations to supply. Continual ask
ing, with a total absence of giving,
forms that ''one sided" systam drolly
said to be "like tbe handle of a jue,"
and it does not nee the wisdom of a Sol
omon to understand that any such sys
tem, however well It may work for a
time, must eventually fall into disfavor
and failure.
These suggestions which may seem
to many very trite, have theirorigin in
a fact of considerable importance none
the less important , probably, because
very many do not recognize it, and
still others who do recognize it blindly,
fail to understand the whole omen in
volved. The women of Ameiica are
gradually it is to be leared, placing
themselves in a false position. If they
do not tike heed to their steps, they
may emerge with a loss of what to
ihein in very dear and indeed (in their
dea) indispensable Lause we do not
wish them to work blindly when tiie
light is so easily supplied, and because
we do not wish the very loveliest body
of women on earth to place themselves
too declaredly in a false position from
which they cau only retreat with loss,
we feel like saying a few words, in
tended entirely for their bene lit.
We have said that they are "the very
loveliest body of women on earth"
the women of America. (We do not
use the hackneyed fashionable word,
"ladles," because we consider that the
other at once conveys and covers so
much more.) There can be no doubt
of tbe justice of the claim here made
for tbvin. As a body, and au average,
the women of America, all classes be
ing considered, are not only iu advance
of their sisters of any other nation on
the globe, but they are actually beyond
the range of comparison. Certain
classes in some of the European coun
tries, may claim to have very nearly
the same standard of attractiveness;
but to certain classes only can the
claim be applied w ith any hope of suc
cess. The daughters ot the aristocracy
of Kngland, w ith nurture of the most
careful, health-preserving opportuni
ties of tbe most enviable, and all the
surroundings of life that can be con
sidered as advantages, certainly pre
sent, w hen seen in the park or tbe ball
room, a wonderful array of loveliness;
but even they could scarcely it actual
ly, hold rank with a very much lower
class of American women, if the latter
had the same advantages of dress and
personal ornamentation; and their sis
ters, lower down in the scale, cannot
be named in the same connection. Old
travelers on the continent of Europe,
say tliat in one place the Jardina Co
va, at Milan, in Italy, the array of
loveliness is sometimes bewildering,
even to an American eye, and that
hundred upon hundred of girls and
young women may there be seen, each
capable of giving a heart-ache to the
impressible. But the wisest of rhese
observers take notice, and make a com
ment of the fact, that the Milam segirl
on these occasions of evening resort
and amusement, are never encumber
ed with the concealing if not -disfiguring
bonnet that they simply wear the
Spanish mantilla, flirt the Spanish fan,
and so enjoy all the advantages tney
may possess in the way of hair and
shape of bead, in addition to what
American girls could show of thebeau
y of eyes, play of featiire, and grace
fulness of figure.
Undoubtedly, the American women
are, as an average the handsomest in
the world beyond question, so up to
at least middle life and the changes
consequent upon maternity. Undoubt
edly the men of America, as regards
the treatment of women, are the most
thivalrous of any other race now liv
ing, not ouly as among the shades of
the country, or exceptionally in tbe
South and the Far West, where the ro
mantic is supposed to have a more
abiding hold tlmn in the Commercial
East and its chief cities, New York,
Philadelphia, Boston and the others
approaching them In size and import
ance. Nowhere else on the earth, are
women expected to do so little in the
way of earning the bread to be eaten;
nowhere else are they considered en
titled to so inevitable a "front seat" in
every place of public amusement or
mode of conveyance. More than any
where else in the world, iu the Amer
ica of the closing nineteenth century,
is the lifted hat or he apologetic word
so common ; nowhere else is the softest
half of humanity considered so tinim
peacbably the nobler half, to be guard
ed, yielded to and comparatively wor
shipped.
And yet, the truth must be told, the
lust ten years, and even more than the
last ten, the last five, have witnessed a
notable falling off in the chivalrous
treatment accorded to women unknown
by those males who chanced to be flung
into contact with them. The occupied
seat is not so frequently given up by
the gentleman in car and stag?, as it
was five or ten years ago ; the effort is
not so general a one, to save the lady
from having to bear any of the bur
thens of travel or society. Some have
blindly recognized the fact; some have
refused to notice it ; some have deter
minedly denied it, yet the fct remains ;
and the best lovers of womanhood ad
mitting it, set themselves to discover
what it means.
It is not, certainly, that we are as
people, worse manuered than we were
ten oi twenty years ago. By no means.
The general tone of manners has ma
terially bettered. I here are more gen
tlenien in any given circle, than there
were at either of the times noted. For
eign travel, better education, the pres
ence of the better class of foreigners
among us, the possession or more
wealth and more of tbe polished habits
' of wealth, all these have combiue2 to
Conduct
America.
make the American men, as an aver
age, more chivalrous than lie was at
the former period. And yet he pays
less respect to unknown womanhood.
Whyf
Simply because the American wom
an, petted beyond anyW her sisters in
the other parts of the world, has taken
in soinothing too much of belief in the
goddess ship ascribed to her by her
male admirers. It has became some
thing of a habit with her, to receive
the courtesies extended, as a matter of
course. She does not meet those cour
tesies with enough of her own, so
easily extended, and so valued by any
one who will take th trouble to be
chivalrous towards her. She takes,
somewhat too much as a matter of
course, the seat given her in car, stage
or public assembly; and she takes it
most of the time, without evidencing
any appreciation of the fact, that tha
gentleman making room for her, or in
any other way smoothing her path to
one of comfort, makes any sacrifice iu
so doing.
He dee make a sacrifice, very often
a sacrifice that he would be very slow
to make, except to the representative
of the beautiful sex from whence came
his mother, his shter, his wife. He
maybe sixty ant gray haired; or he
may be thoroughly wearied after a
day of intense toil ; and when he leaves
his scat in car or coach, or performs
any other of the kindly offices due from
manhood to womanhood he is very
likely to be making a sacrifice, and to
do so in the hope, at least, that gome
kind word, some pleasant smile, or at
least a nod of approbation, may reward
him for it; and if, year after year, he
finds that his k'nduess is merely receiv
ed as a matter of course, he will prove
himself quite removed irora the liue of
ordinary manhood, if he does not cool
in bis chivalry and resolve to keep what
seems to be worth so little to the person
accepting it.
Women af America ! We have clear
ly stated our conviction that you are,
as a race, the loveliest on earth. We
have, later, clearly stated our knowl
edge that gradually the males of your
race, the most chivalrous on the globe,
have tired of paying you the extreme
devotion once accorded. Now we
state the concluding fact, that tlu fault
is your own. You hold yourselves too
high, even if not higher than your hus
bands and lovers held you at the be
ginning. Help the men of America to
keep their old statutes, by receiving
their courtesies with somewbat fewer
of the airs of the throned queen, some
what more of the grace and graceful
words and actions of womanhood.
Your trenttMnt cannot be otherwise
than good, except under the most un
fortunate circumstances; let your con
duct deserve that and more, and you
will be tbe loveliest as well as the
most beautiful. Onr Second Century.
Superior Abilities,
Jfow there abidelh these things,
which every man can do better than
any one elue :
Poke a fi re.
Put on his own hat.
Edit a newspaper.
Tell a story after another man has
begun it.
Examine a railroad time table.
Did you never notice that if yon
open a railroad guide and begin to look
for some particular train, that some of
ficious man in th crowd will spring
up and lay his great mumo rigni over
tbe column your train is in. and try to
find yon the night express on tlie
Chicago, Burlington and Quincy, fcy
roaming up and down a column head
ed "accommodation, in the Illinois
Central side of the page? And you
can't bluff him off either. A few days
ago, a quiet looking nun on the Wa
bash railroad called the train boy and
asked him for a railroad guide for a
moment. Then he began to examine
the columns, and a very busy-looking
man behiud him leaned over the seat
and said :
'What train are you looking for?
"Where do want to go? I can find it
for you i' your not much accustomed
to this sort of thing.
The stranger thanked him and said
he was looking up some of tlie connec
tions of the Wabash Kaiiroad, and he
guessed he could find what be wanted.
The busy man immediately took hold
of the guide and pulled it away from
him.
"You'll never find it looking that
wav, he said ; "now, tell me where
you want to go. I know nearly all the
connections cf this rond. I travel over
this line twice every sixty days."
After a vain effort to get his guide
book, the stranger reluctantly yielded,
and the busy man looked down the col
umn of "ticket fares' and ascertained
that the stranger's train reached Dan
ville at $4.76, and then he looked down
the column of distances and discovered
that the connecting train for V in-
cennes left at G&1. Then he handed
the guide back to the stranger, and
leaned back in his seat with tbe air of
a christian, unsemsn man, wno nau
at some trouble to himself, of course,
set a bewildered wayfarer right. The
stranger thanked him quietly and with
every appearance of profound grati
tude.
"Oh," said the man loftily, "that's
all right; these railroad guides are all
Greek to people who aint accustomed
to railroading."
By and by the stranger went into the
other coach, and the busy man, notict
ing the respectful demeanor of the
breakraan as be passed out, called to
the employe and asked :
"Who is that man?"
Mr. II. C. Townsend," said the
brakeman, "the general passenger and
ticket agent of this road."
And tbe busy man lookad straight
out of the car window a long, long
time, and every time the train-boy
went by shouting "railroad guides!"
he turned pale and shuddered.
The Newark, (X. J.) papers pub
lish a list of tax delinquents comprising
5824 namea. This list is to be publish
ed once week for six weeks, each pa
per receivingOO for the ,20 publication.
A Xwted Froatle
"Do you know to whom Holland refer
red in his character, Belcher, in 'Seven
oaks?'" "No. Do you 1"
"Colonel Sam Colt. Holland and I were
school-fellows and friends always or I
should never have known."
"How strange!" I exclaimed. I knew
some of the other characters ; Benedict, for
instance."
"Where did you meet him ?"
"On the Cowlitz river, near its junction
with the Columbia, Washington territory.
He is no less a personage than the lineal
descendant of Sir William Wallace, the
Scottish chief."
"Col. Colt's character I think very fairly
represented in Belcher. How about Wal
lace's iu Benedict i"
"Excepting in his excessive modesty, not
at all. I think to-day he is as bashful as a
school-girl ; but no one can make his ac
quaintance without being impressed that he
is a fitting representative of his famous an
cestor) powerful in body and mind, brave
and eenerous."
"ilail he a sister t"
"Yes highly educated and possessing all
the graces and accomplishments of mind
and person that Mrs. Dillingham personi
fied, and was a wealthy widow at the time
referred to. Jn 1H03 I spent some monjhs
in Mr. Wallace's family and learned some
of his history from the family and neigh
bors. Wallace had an inventive mind. At
the age of eighteen he supposed he had dis
covered perpetual motion. He called the
prorietor of an eastern machinery depot at
midnight to witness his triumph, who, on
insjiecting his machine, exclaimed: "By
Jove, you've got it." Wallace laughed
alxmt his early hunt and aaid that when any
man could hold himself by lifting at his
own loot straps tliat man had a reasoiable
hope of discovering perpetual motion.
"In 147 he married a beautiful Scotch
lass and crossed the continent to Fort Walla
Walla, but continued his journey to Oregon
just in season to escape the Wheatland mas
sacre. I Ie soon took the advantages offered
by the government and became one of the
few who made the settlement of the Cowlitz
river; and soon after became the engineer
of the first steamboat ever run on the
Columbia river, the BelL Though exposed
at all times to the dangers of a frontier life,
he never courted the friendship of the In
dians but, on the contrary, treated them
with open, haughty contempt. But a short
time previous to the great Indian massacre
of '." he ordered a chief, who was erecting
a wigwam on his ranche, to leave. The
Indian olieyed, but with threats of speedy
revenge on the Boston man. A few days
after lie was warned to flee to the block
house for safety. He paid no attention to
the warning further than to put his own
house in order.
"The great massacre commenced, and the
whirlwind of death passed him on either
siiie, but no band of savages dared molest
the Boston chief, who, ensconced in his
own house on the bank of the river, sur
rounded only by his own family, aimed
with weapons of his own invention the
famous revolver partly perfectel laughed
at all their threats. Two miles east of bis
house abruptly terminate the rich bottom
lands of the Columbia and commence the
Cascade Mountains the most inaccessible
part of tlie rocky range. .Mount SU Helens
looks down on them shrouded in everlasting
snows. From these mountain lairs bears
mountain lions catamounts and other wild
lieasis constantly prowl about the fiel.ls and
pastures of the settlers. Soon after the
massacre referred to, while Jlr. Wallace
was pmstr.ited with rheumatism, he heard
a neighbor's hunting dog barking in the
edge of the woods not far from his house."
"Asking his boy, Leander, to carry his
rifle he took two canes and hobbled out to
where the supposed lar was treed. The
moss, which on the Columbia bottoms cov
ers trees from limb to limb, prevented his
seeing bis game till he arrived immediately
Ix-neath, when he saw, looking sharply at
the dig, a catamount of the largest size.
Stepping along a few feet, he took the rifle
from his boy's hand and turned to the tree.
The catamount soon changed its position,
presenting a fair mark. He carefully aimed
and tired. Tlie catamount sank out of
sight in tlie moss but did not falL Drop
ping his ritle and drawing his hunting knife,
he turned to his boy and said : "Leander,
we shall have a dead catamount or the big
eest fliht vou ever saw in less than a min
ute." He had a dead catamount. I might
talk all night of his adventures hut think
we hail better tum in."
"But the revolver! Did Wallace ever
make anything out of it ?"
"Not up to '63. His wife told me he
was too diffident to approach Col. Colt on
the subject."
"l ou sav this w allace is the lineal de
scendant of Sir William Wallace, tike Scot
tish chief t"
"Yes. While I was there a younger
brother came from Massachusetts bringing
the escutcheon or patent of nobility. It
consisted simply of a piece of parchment
covered with raised figurea representing
fiats at arms and deeds of justice. I he
only wonls legible were, To the name of
Wallace and the signature of the king.
The parchment was yellow with tlie age of
ten centuries and the words almost hiero
glyphics. It was given the family long
In-fore bir V ilham made the family name
immortal. This ancient document and the
secret oi its possession are almost equally
well preserved. It was received from the
aged father with emotions of awe; and had
I not been an inmate of the house at the
time I should pmbablv never have known
of its existence or of Mr. Wallace's famous
anccsbrs."
A Gambling Family.
All of the brothers Fox Charles,
James and Stephen were desperate
gamblers. Charles Fox played admir
ably at whist and piquet with such
skill, that at Brooke's, along about
1773. it was generally admitted he
night have made 4,000 a year,
they calculated, at those games, if he
had confined himself to them. But his
misfortune arose from playing pure
games of chance, particularly faro.
After eating and drinking freely, he
sat down at tbe faro table, and invaria
bly rose a loser- Once, and only once,
he won about 3,000 in the course of a
single evening. Part of the money he
paid away to his creditors, and the
other he lost almost immediately. Be
fore he had attained his thirtieth year
he had completely dissipated every
thing he commanded or could procure
by the meat ruinous expedient. Top-
ham Beauelerc, who lived much in
Fox' society, affirmed that no man
could form an idea of the extremities
to which he ha been put to raise
money after losing his last guinea at
the faro table. He was reduced, for
several days to such distress, as to bor
row money from the club waiters. Tha
very chairmen who carried him to
Brooks' be was unable to pay and
they used to dun him for their arrears.
In 1771 he might be considered ait ex
tinct volcano, for the pecuniary all-
ment that had fed the flame was long
consun ed ; yet then he occupied a
house or lodging in St. James street,
close to Brooke's and passed at ir
club almost every hour that was nt
devoted to the. House of Commons.
Brooke's was then the rallying pol l .
or rendezvous of the opposition, when,
while faro, whist and supper prolong
ed the night, the principal members o'
the minority in both houses met to
compare their information, or to con
cert or mature their measures. Great
sums were borrowed of Jews at ex
orbitant premiums. Fox called his
ante-room, where the Jews waited till
he rose, '"the Jerusalem Chamber."
The ruling passion of Charles was
owing to the lax training of his father,
who by his lavish allowances foatcre
his propensity for play. According to
Chesterfield, the first Lord Hoi lan !
'had no fixed principles in religion cr
morality." He gave full swing t
Charles in his youth. "Let nothing be
done," said his lordship, "to break h:
spirit, the world will do that for him."
When his lordship died, in 1774, he left
Charles, 154,000 to pay his debts. It
was all signed away and Charles was as
deeply pledged as before. Fox once
played cards with Fitzpatrick at
Brookes', from tea o'clock at night to
six o'clock the next afternoon, a waiter
standing by to tell them "whose deal I
was," they being too sleepy to know.
Another time, Fox having won and a
certain bond creditor presenting him
self for payment, was coolly received
"Impossib'e air," said Fox, "I mus .
first discharge my debts of honor."
The bond creditor remonstrated.
"Well, sir, give me your bond." It
was delivered to him, and tearing it to
pieces he threw it in the fire. "Xow.
sir," he said, "my debt to you is a debt
of honor," and he immediately paid
the man. Walpole notes that in the
debate on the thirty new articles, Feb
ruary 6,1774, Fox did not shine. er
could it be wondered at ; he had sat up
playing at hazzard, at Almaek's, froi
Tuesday evening the 4th, till S In tha
afternoon of Wednesday, the 5th. Ai
hoar before he had recovered 12,0Gv
which he had lost, and by dinner, which
was at 5 o'clock, he had ended by losing
11,000. On the Thursday he spoke in
the above debate, went to dinner 11.30
at night: from thence to White's,
where he drank till seven o'clock the
next morning; thence to Almaek's.
where he won 0.000, and between S
and 4 o'clock he set out for Xew Mar
ket." His brother Stephen lost 11,-
000 the night after, and Charles 10,000
more on the 13th, so that in the three
nights the three brothers, the eldee'
but twenty-five, lost 32,000.
Gree Hand.
One of the plumbing establishments
of Danbury took a new jour the other
day. He was from a hamlet over in
Xew York State, a little hamlet where
be had worked with his father. The
day after his arrival there was a burst
in the water pipe of a house on Pine
street. He was told to go over there
and attend to it.
Seeing the owner of the house in the
shop, he went up to him and got the
particulars or the break, and then he
made ready his tools and startel.
Just as be was passing out of the
door the propieror saw him.
'Where are you going?" he almost
screamed.
The new man told him.
"Do you mean to tell me that you
are going up there to fix that pip
without examining it?" he gasped.
"Vi hy I am goinr to look at it when
I get there," said the new man.
'Merciful heavens!" eiaculated bis
employer catching hold of hi desk to
support himself. "Can it be possible
hat you would do a job at one visit?
Don't you know your trade any better
than that? Have you no pride in your
business? W hy you'd ruin the eutire
community in less thin a year." Aud
the speaker Durst Into tears.
As soon as he grew calmer he ex
plained to the new man that he should
lirst visit the house, make a thorough
examination ot the building, tret the
lay of the street, find the location of
the nearest hydrant, go p to the roof
of the house, and then return thought
fully to the shop for his tools, keeping
an accurate record of the time.
Sha Licked Bin
'Xow, Mrs. Roosmyer," said hi
Honor, "what do you want a warrant
for?"
"For a husband so much I know."
"What's he been doing ?"
"I licked him."
"You licked him !"
"I licked him. Uud I got right py
dose."
"How do you make that out?"
"Yen 'I told you then you find out.
I fix his dinner so he go py his vork.
Then he catch his hand pehint, und say
he got a pain in his pack. So he lie
down on the lounge und groan like he
was very pad. Yen he feel better it
vas too late to go py his vork, o he say
he goin to the greek uud catch some
fish. lie don't goome pacK before it
was nighd, und all the fish vat he got
va a meeserable leedle pull-head what
you couldn't gound ; put he smell like
some petr-barrels more ash dwendy
dimes. Und den he say :
"What for supper aind ready?"
"I tell him, 'you gplilit some of dose
fire-wood und I dalk mlt you. Then
he catch py his arm and scream :
" 'Oh ! I gat the roomatics !' "
" 'So you can'd sphlit some wood ?"I
ay.
" 'Xein; oh! dose roomaticks ! doee
roomaticks !' be kept on grying
"Then I was madder as you dink.
Und I say : Yen you told me you got
a bajn in your pack, I say noting. Und
ouf you got dooble up on aeccund you
got some of dose roomaticks, I say it
as all riglid. Put py golly, euf you
don't got dose bain in the pack und
dot roomaticks vat don't goome only
ven you got some vork to do, tnen I
lick you on sighd.' "
"Very well, if you licked him what
do you want a warrant for?"
"On account he shall be locked np
uri oud the vay so I put smearease oat
my bred, py shimmy t ' Yot yen
dink?" -
i
E
fi
SOLD EVERYWHERE.
tan and eheeae wars aiu i -