£|aiuillc3!ittclliijeiucr
liitoblishcd in 1828.
ID. AV3T IJ'JTZ
Editor an.il Proprietor,
DANVILLE, PA., NOV, 24, 1905.
i'nbllshcd every Friday ait Danville, the
county seat of Montour eounty, l?a., at 81.00 a
year In advance or 91.25 If not paid In ad
vance; and no paper will be discontinued
until all arrearage Is paid, except at the
option of tin; publisher.
1 tat OH of advertising madu known on ap
plication. Address all communications to
THE INTELLIGENCER,
DANVILLK, PA.
"Jpi'iniah taps," Esq.
LIBERY TONSHIP, NOV. 20, 1905.
DEER EDITOR :
'L'lio other uite Bill Giles, my
nabor, cume down ajjain. It wuz so
long since Bill lied cum down that I
thought mebbe he mite be cross abot
sumthiu. you no Bill is an eddicated
man. Ho takes awl them thear
nusepeppers over to Donvil. The
'telligeueer, the Denvil Morning Star,
the dummyerat au the Jem. He tolo
me wun time thet the Dummyerat
wuz gettin so dogasted poor thet the
ole woman couldn't bild lire with it
110 more, and he wood stop takin it
sum of these hear fine daze. Sez I,
Bill, I am glad to see you once more.
Did you here eunything abot poletics
lately ? you bet 1 did, Jerry, sez lie,
they hev 'lected too Publican con -
misioners over to Denvil. Haint it
too bad ? you see the way it wuz.
Sum of them thear young understrap
per poltshuus tried to pick Ole Hick
ory an put him in a bag befoar he
•wuz ripe. They sed "wat the 'ell do
we care abot legalty, so long as we
get wat we want." Sumtiines we
doau git wat we want ennyhow.
Well, Ole Hickory he feeld awful bad
abot the way he wuz used, then he
got crust and vowed vengence. Sez
he, by mo sowl, ef I doant get in a
smack belo the belt in the nex six
months, kin put me down for a Ivar.
So Ole Hickory he laid low an kept
kind of quiet like, you must be quiet
like in politics or you may git into
trouble—sumtimes you- w ill git into
trouble ennyhow.
Wen the day cum for the fite
which wuz Nov. 7th, Ole Hickory
cum out in line form, he bed a biceps
on him like a pork barrel, and an
ominous squint in hiz eye, an it was
plane to 113 seen thet there wuz gone
to be trouble. I kaut give you the
lite in rounds, but wen the time cum
for gitten down to bizuess, Ole Hick
ory got in a punch on the solar
plexus thet made them howl. It was
a reglar old Fitzsimmoner. Billy
Vest and Ilorass Blou, who were sit
ten in the front seats near the ring,
got bail hurt, we gess it must hev bin
the 'leetiicity, or sumthiu of thet
kind, l'oor Horass, he will hev to
stay in li d for a long wile, an take
bitter iNirk too. The Doctor sey
wen In' i; - better he will not be able
to wurk at his ole job no more, but
will luv to do lite wurk all nex sum
mer. Billy Vest hez a hardier con
stitushon, en can stan the raps better,
but the doctor sez he lied not better
wurk at the Coanty Slietership fur
three vers ennyhow. But he kin go
on writin briefs an eddicatin country
squires an the like.
You see, Jerry, sez Bill, wear the
mistake was made wuz wen they at
tempted to pick Ole Hickory befoar
he wuz quite ripe. Now ill lay you
two to wun thet Ole Hickory will be
commishners' clerk. Won't thet be
a nauseous doas for the understrappers
to take ?
I won't say nuthiu abot that thear
feller grean this time, lie is kiuder
quiet like now and I will not ster him
up. Beside he mite put me to jale,
en George Mires sez thear are too
meuny in jaly sumtimes already.
Yours trooly,
Jr.IIMIAII GRIMES.
[A remarkable coinciilei.ee in the
life of Jeremiah Grimes is, that (lur
ing the past week, several have made
inquiry at our offiee regarding this
individual's existence and where "he
is now a! " Then comes our Straw
berry Ridge correspondent in a rev
alation of a recent dream, and Jerry
himself turns up at his old home.
He never explains tiis absence, which
his friends are very solicitous of, for
in his Inst communication he said he
vrnulil appear the following week if
he were not put to jail, and Jerry is a
man of vaiaeiiy, too —Ed].
Ritter-Glrton.
Wednesday evening, November 22,
Miss Cora Girton became the bride of
our genial and hustling assistant, Mr.
Harry 1.. Hitter.
The shades of night were gently
stealing when the happy pair stole
quietly from our midst and heard the
words that, pronounced them man and
wife. The ceremony took place at
the home of the bride's auut, Mrs.
Cbas. Steele, Hloomsburg, and the
officiating minister was Hev. Tinker
of the Baptist church, that city.
The devoted and happy pair are
two of Danville's best young people ;
they enjoy a large circle of friends,
who join in wishing them a long,
prosperous and happy union.
Miss Girton is a daughter of Mr.
and Mrs. John Girton, Walnut
street, and Mr. Hitter is the youngest
son of Mr. and Mrs. Win. Hitter,
Railroad street.
The affair was a quiet one, only a 1
few of the immediate friends being
present. Beside Mr. and Mrs. Steele
were the bride's parents, her sister, j
Mrs. John Heighmiller, and her
husband After the union was
effected a luncheon was served and
merry-making indulged in until the
newly made bride and groom departed
for their home iu this city, where
they arrived too late for the general
calithuinpian cerenading, which will |
take place tonight (Thursday)
promptly after supper and continue
till 12 p. m. Our very best wishes
we extend again.
Here is Relief fur Women.
If yon hive pains in the buck, Urinary,
Bladder or Kidney trouble, and want a cer
tain. i>l<"i<mnt herb remedy for woman's Ills,
try Mother Ofay's Australian-Leaf. It Is a sat'.-
monthly regulator At druggists or by mail,
60c. Maniple package FUKIi. Address, The
Mother tiray Co., LeKoy, N V.
o*o*o*o*o*o*oo*o®o®o#o*o®o
• •
§ Blackberries §
• For Supper •
• •
2 By C. B. LEWIS •
O o
• •
0 Copjvijcht, 1006, by R. B. McCION O
• •
0*0*0«0®0®0«00*0®0®0®0*0®0
Aunt Judy Taylor, relict of Illram
Taylor, had come 011 from I own to live
with lier brother and his family for the
rest of her life. She had sold all her
earthly possessions in the west for a
thousand dollars in cash, and a few
days after her arrival she had turned
this money over to her brother James,
with the remark:
"Now, James, this is all yours but
S2OO. That S2OO is for Clara when she
gets married. It's for her to make a
wedding tower on. When I was mar
ried 1 wanted to make a wedding tow
er to Niagara falls, but Hiram hadn't
but sl3 togo on. I've always said that
if one of my nieces ever got married
she should see Niagara falls if she
had to wear one petticoat for the next
five years."
Clara was the daughter of the broth
er and his wife, and she already had a
beau. lie was a young man from the
nearest village, and after seeing him
two or three times Aunt Judy said to
the girl:
"Clara, that feller of yours will never
set the river a tire, but there's nothing
mean about him. He'll provide a good
table and have plenty of wood at the
back door, and I guess tlmt will be just
as well as if he was swelling around
and telling what a great man he was.
I'm judging him by his nose. When j
you see a man with his nose humped '•
up in the middle you can set him down |
for a good tempered man."
The brother put the money In bank
at the village, but after a little Aunt
Judy began to worry about It. She
was assured that the bank was as
sound as the hills, but she shook her
head and replied:
"I dunuo, James—l duuuo. Of course,
it's your money now, but I'm sorry I
didn't see the banker before you gave
it to him. I think I'll have you drive
me to town some day, so that 1 can get
a look at him."
"But Scott's bank has been here for
twenty years," persisted the brother.
"Yes, I s'pose it has, but out in lowa
they caught a man stealing pumpkius
wlio'd lived an honest life for 6ixty
years. I wouldn't like to see you lose
your money; and If anything happened
to Clara's S2OO I'd have a tit. She's j
got to make a bridal tower to Niagara j
falls or I won't see her married. Folks
have told me that more water runs :
over the falls jn a day than would run
a mill dam for a week and that there's I
a roar going 011 just like half a dozen !
bulls bellerin' in the distance. I want ,
to get a look at that banker. I can tell '
In a minute whether he's honest or
not."
A few days later she was driven to
the village and an errand made to the
bank.
"James," Aunt Judy said while they
were driving home, "do you know that j
a woman knows forty times as much
as a man?"
"I hadn't heard of it,"was the reply.
"Waal, you hear of it now. That
banker hain't an honest man. It won't j
be a year before he'll bust up and 1
leave you all in the lurch."
"Pooh! Pooh! Mr. Scott has the j
confidence of hundreds of people, and
1 don't worry over my money any
more than as if it was burled in the
cellar. You mustn't get such notions
int » your head."
"It's 110 notion, James. Out in lowa |
we had three different hired men on j
the farm who turned out to be thieves,
and each of them looked like that
banker. I never in the world would
buy a tiling of a tin peddler until I had
looked at his eyes. There's something
in them I always can tell. I wish that
money of Clara's was out of his hands." |
"Come now, Judy; don't be silly. I'd j
trust Mr. Scott the same as my own
brother."
"All right. We'll say 110 more about
it. Only if Clara is disappointed in
seeing Niagara falls I shan't be the
same woman I was. They say that
when you stand and look at till that
water pouring over, the chills go up your
back and you don't feel knee high to a
grasshopper. Isn't there any way to
catch that water in rain barrels and
store it up agin a drought?"
"Might be," replied the brother, who
had a very hazy opinion of things out
side his own township.
At intervals of every two weeks dur
ing the next eight months Aunt Judy
came back to the subject of the bank
er, and her worry never ceased. It
was treated as a "notion" and not tak
en seriously.
Indue time Clara's beau popped the
question and was accepted and the day
set, and Aunt Judy was so busy sew
ing that there were times when she al
most forgot her fears. It lacked but
two weeks of the marriage day when
the brother drove to the village 011 an
errand. lie came back looking as white
at a dead man. Aunt Judy, who was
the first to see him, gave him a long
look and said:
"Waal, didn't I tell you so?"
"Scott's bank has busted!" he groan
ed ns ho sat down.
"Of course It has. I knew It would.
llow much you lost?"
"About $700."
"And Clara's S2OO Is gone with It!
Only two weeks before she Is to set
out 011 her brlrlal tower, and how is
she going to see Niagara falls?"
"I feel like hanging myself!" groan
ed the brother.
"80 will a heap of others. Next time
dome of you may believe what nn old
woman from lowa has to say. What
did you hear about the bank?"
"Scott took all the money lust night
and ran away."
"Humph! Waal, you can sit here and
sigh and groan, and Hannah and Clara
can go upstairs and cry over It. I've
1 got to keep outdoors and walk around
or bust. I'll go down to'rds the woods,
where nobody'll hear me gritting my
. teeth."
I Aunt Judy wont down through the
barnyard 11ml across a meadow and
presently found herself at the fringe
of the cool green woods. She was
much put out and was using as hard
words as an old woman ever does,
when she caught sight of a blackberry
bush loaded with ripe fruit. The spirit
of thrift came to the surface at once.
"We've got to have supper if a dozen
banks bust," she said to herself, "and
these blackberries are what we want
for sass. It's funny that no one has
t said auything about them."
| She untied her suubonnet and begau
to strip off the berries. She went from
bush to bush and was gradually led
deeper into the woods. She had picked
enough and was making ready to re
turn to the house when she reached for
the last few berries und suddenly '
found a man under her feet. She
caught sight of his feet and legs and
gave a little scream, but did not run
away. On the contrary, she placed her
bonnet on the ground and then grabbed
the feet and pulled the rest of the
mau's body out Into view. The next
Instant she exclaimed:
"So It's you, is It, you thieving crlt
-1 terV"
She had recognized Scott, the banker,
at first glance, and, stepping over his
prostrate body, she f?lt under the
bushes and brought out a bulky satchel.
"Well, what have you got to say for
yourself?" she asked as he maintained
a sulky silence.
"I—l liuve sprained my ankle," he re
plied.
"I was wondering If the Lord would
let you get away with Clara's money.
You must have come here to hide last
night till you could get away for good,
j I told James over and over that you'd
turn out to be a thief. Why don't you
lie and say you are not Scott?"
"It's no use. I have suffered all day
and am about dead."
"Waal, that's a p'lnt In your favor
that you hadn't tried to lie out of It.
I'll lug this satchel to the house and
get help."
Things ended well for the depositors
of Scott's bank, though the banker
himself had to do a term of five years
instate prison.
Long before he was put on trial, how
ever, Clara's marriage came off, and
she Htarted 011 her "bridal tower." The
happy couple were gone for two weeks,
and the first one to sight them on their
return was Aunt Judy. When she had
kissed and hugged the happy luide she
stood off and said:
"Now, then, sit right down and tell
me all about Niagara falls. Is there
barrels and barrels of water going to
waste every day? Do they roar like a
lot of mad bulls? Did you feel mean
and small when you stood and looked
at 'em? Did a hack dr!ver*tako you to
'leven different places and only charge
you 10 cents apiece 'cause he knew
that you was related to me and that I
was a dangerous woman to fool with?
Tell me all about It and don't miss a
thing."
A Fetching: Eclio.
"Tact often goes a great way In a
case," said a lawyer. "I know a man
who defended au old fellow charged
with stealing an armful of wood.
"The judge was very deaf and had a
habit of talking to himself. Sometimes
unconsciously lie talked to himself in a
pretty loud tone.
"Now, 111 this case when the prosecu
tor took the stand and identified his
stolen wood with great posltlveuess the
judge asked himself In a louder key
than he was aware of:
" 'How can lie Identify this wood
when one stick's as much like another
stick as one egg like auother?'
"The tactful lawyer for the defense
rose immediately.
I " 'Your honor,' he exclaimed passion
ately, 'how can this witness Identify
his wood so positively wheu one stlek
is as much like another stick as one
egg is like another?*
"The judge turned to the Jury, with a
great start.
" 'Gentlemen,' lie said, 'you will ac
quit the prisoner. That very thought
dashed through my head not a moment
before the words were spoken by the
learned counsel for Jhe defense. Yes,
you will acquit the prisoner, gentle
men. I consider this a direct interposi
tion of Providence.'" —Minneapolis
Journal.
Candid Cr!tl«*l*v.x.
Scribe (to professor)—Do you mean
to say that you can Infer a man's char
acter from Ills handwriting? Well,
then, what do you think of this?
(Hands him a specimen.)
Professor—The writer 1m a man of
some ability, but altogether destitute
of moral sense. If not a downright
villain lie must be a very unscrupulous
fellow and not to be trusted on any
Account whatever. I cau read his
character at a glance, though not his
characters.
Scribe—How so?
Professor—llls writing is so illegible
that I can't decipher it. A man who
won't take the trouble to write a legi
ble hand must be so utterly regardless
of the trouble he gives to everybody
who has to make his scrawl out, so
viciously Inconsiderate that he would
not stlek at committing any atrocity
which It would cost him the slightest
exertion to refrain from. I judge lilm
to be a rogue, a swindler and a thief, j
capable, of anything but forgery.
Whoso is this disgraceful scribble?
Scribe—Well—a—to tell you the truth,
u fact, It's mine!
MASTERS OF CARVING.
Our Aneentora lluil a Yoeobulary We
Have Quite Forffotteu.
What do we moderns know about
carving? I say that I carve a pheasant
when I divide it into two more or less
equal portions. Not so our ancestors, j
Carving is an art. Let me quote from ;
an old book 011 cnrvlng some of the
terms of that art:
llcmember that there were carving
masters 111 those days, professors of
the art. They were Itinerants. They
did not keep school. They went from
house to house and taught the ladies.
As for their social position, I have
not ascertained It. Probably they
were classed with the itinerant por
trait painter. Certainly they did not
sit at table with the gentlefolk. I
fear that their place was the kitchen
and that Lady Mary toak her lessons
In that room surrounded by the admir
ing maids.
But the only thing she "carved" was
mutton or beef. You had to "break a
deer, rear a goose, lift a swan, sauce
a capon, spoil a hen, frush a chicken,
unbrace a mallard, unlace a cony, dis
mount a heron, display a crane, dis
figure a peacock, unjoint a bittern, un
taek a curlew, alaye a pheasant, wing
a partridge or a quail, mince a plover,
thigh a pigeon or any other small bird
and border a game pie."
And the acquisition of these terms
was only the beginning of knowledge.
—London Queen.
Au Ulciilmut Story.
A queer elephant yarn is told in the
Japan Chronicle by the captain of a
trading steamer. On one occasion he
had on board a cargo of forty ele
phants. The ship was at anchor in a
calm sea, but began to roll rloleutly.
The captain investigated and learned
that the elephants had in some way
found that by swaying to and fro all
together a rocking motion was produc
ed that seemed to please them im
mensely. So the great heads aud bodies
rolled aud swung in unison until the
steamer, which had 110 other cargo and
rode light, was in imminent danger
of rolling clean over. The attendants
were hurried down into the hold and,
after a great deal of shouting and
thumping, managed to stop their dan
gerous amusement. Jules Verne tells
as a fiction of the sinking of a ship
In that way, and the question is, Has
some one in Japan been reading Verne
or was the novelist's fancy justified by
• a real experience?
SEND us
A cow, i|
Steer, Bull or Horse
lude, Calf skin, Dog 007*1
skin, or any other kind
ot hide or skin, and let |BuBB
us tan it with the hair
on, soft, light, odorless
and moth-proof,for robe,
rug, coat or gloves.
But first get our Catalogue,
giving prices, and our shipping
tags and instructions, so as to
avoid mistakes. We also
raw furs and ginseng.
TMB CROSBY FRISIAN PUR COMPANY.
116 Mill Street, Roaheater, N. V.
1
c =o
The Abduction
By C. B. LEWIS
Copyright, 1905, by P. C. Eastment
o
It was a plan conceived iu the iiiiud
of Jerry Puluier, convict No. 4370, one
night as he tusned to and fro on his
prison couch about three weeks pre
vious to the expiration of his live years'
sentence. Jerry had tried thieving,
burglary and forgery and had served
sentences for all of them and after
thinking things over had concluded to
make a change, Reform was not in
cluded in the change. Jerry strongly
believed that the world owed him a
living and that it was his constitutioual
privilege to get that living in the easi
est way possible, lie would keep right
on thinking so, but he would adopt a
new and safer line.
"Abduction is the thing!" exclaimed
Jerry to his prison walls when he had
thought the matter all out. "There's
more clean cash to be made In abduct
ing some rich man's gal than in commit
ting half a dozen burglaries,and the risk
is a mere nothing. All you have to do is
to seize her, shut her up somewhere
till the fond father will pay your price
and then produce her and lug away the
plunks —no publicity, no police, no
prison walls. The rest of the crowd
can go ahead on old Hues, but it's ab
duction for me for the rest of my nat
ural life."
Jerry hadn't been out of prison two
days when lie hunted up his old part
ner, Mike Donovan, and gave him the
tip. Mike, too, was ready to drop old
lines and take up something new. He
had shown energy and ambition as a
burglar and had somewhat astonished
the police by stealing a steain boiler
left on the public street at night, but
had found there was no money in it.
lie had figured it out that the beef
trust was making more In three sec
onds that he was in three years, and if
he hadn't met Jerry he might have
opened a saloon and sold wood alcohol
to his patrons.
The first thing was to find a rich man
with a daughter. No rich man's daugh
ter can be abducted properly until aft
er she has been located. This task con
|
"SLAI'IN' HA r» THANKS YOU FOIt YOUB
LLuOMJN KIKDXI&B."
sumed about three weeks' time. The
pair finally found a rich man 'with a
daughter about sixteen years old, and
they looked upon the battle as half
won. At this point, however, they ran
short of funds, with the result that
they had to take Tommy Saunders into
partnership.
Tommy was a good sort—that is, he
was one of their sort, and Just then he
had some money. He didn't explain
how he got into the house nor what
the haul amounted to, and his partners
didn't ask. There is etiquette even
among thieves.
"Gents," observed Tommy after the
terms of partnership had been settled,
"abduction i:i the tiling! All you have
to do is to pick the gal up under your
arm and take a scoot to a place al
ready prepared, and at the end of a
week her father gives up fifty thou,
and you deliver his darling birdie at
the kitchen door. If it's Jerry Palmer's
plan—and lie says it is—then all I can
say is that Jerry should take his place
among the greatest statesmen of the
country."
An old house in the suburbs that had
been teiiantless for a year was selected
as the hiding place, and then it only
remained to get hold of the girl. Some
trouble was anticipated here. None of
the trio had studied the habits of rich
men's daughters, and they were thus
at a disadvantage.
Fortune favored them, however. The
very first evening they took up their
watch in the neighborhood of the house
Uiey saw the daughter come out with a
basket 011 her arm. She had a shawl
over her head and was otherwise dis
guised. Just why this should be so
they didn't stop to figure, but when the
young lady came out 011 the third even
ing she was seized in first class stvi.o.
Into -iii 01a hack and t>v
handkerchief over the girl's mouth was
cast loosot a candle lighted, and she
was put 011 exhibition.
Somewhat to the surprise of the ab
ductors she began to swear, and every
slang word used anywhere for the last
ten years rolled off her tongue. When
she was obliged to pause for breath
the trio retired into a corner to hold a
consultation.
"I never k 110 wed that rich men's
daughters talked that way," admitted
Jerry, wiih serious countenance.
"Nor I," added Mike, "but there can't
be no mistake. She had just come out !
»112 the gate when we seized her." '
"I duuno why rich nfeii's gals
shouldn't cuss and slang when they get
mad same as any others," mused Tom
ply. "As soon as she gets over it she'll
put on her aristocratic airs and fail at
pUr .feet and_J>e reiUly t$ write 3. MJer
to "li?r pa. T r ve gof *one~reaely ToFTIer
to copy. It says: 'Deer pa, I am
belli' held for fifty thousand plunks.
If you ever want to see your darlin'
; agin give up the dough to the barer of
. this.'"
• "Now, then, • cullies, what is it?"
. asked the girl as their consultation was
ended.
J "Iu the first place," answered Jerry,
j who constituted himself as spokesman,
i "you have been abducted."
I"And what's that, you rat headed
peanut stealer?"
I "You have been tooken from your
! rich father and are to be held here un
til he comes down with the cash."
j "Hully gee!"
"You will write him that you have
been what they calls abducted, but
that you are in the hands of gentlemen
who are treating you kindly."
"It's bewtiful, cully. Goon!"
"Them same gentlemen, wantin' to
take a trip amoiig the aristocracy of
England, but bavin' no money, will
hold you till he comes down with sr>o,-
000. If It's all the same to him we'd
like the money in $5 and $lO bills."
"Oh, Abraham!" chuckled the girl.
"And In writln' the letter you may
odd that your couch is not downy aud
your food not lobster salad and that
If your old man gets a hustle on bim It
will be just as well for you and better
for the gents as has carried along the
job. That's all, I believe, just at pres
ent, except that we are slightly astonish
ed that you should have picked up such
language in a drawin* room. The let
ter will not be writ till morniu', and
meanwhile you can stand up In a cor
ner and goto sleep feelln' as safe as if
In your little bed at home."
As Jerry finished his talk the girl
broke into laughter and kept it up for
five minutes. She laughed in half a
dozen keys, and there was sarcasm
as well as humor In her tones. Then
she sang a verse of a topical song.
Then she screwed up her face aud In
whining tones gave them an imitation
of a beggar soliciting alms. Then she
turned cart wheels twice around the
room, Indulged in half a dozen somer
saults and finished with a low courte
sy and the Words:
"Ladles and gents all, Slapin' Sal
thanks you for your bloomln' kindness
aud has the honor to wish you good
eveuin'."
With that she went clattering down
stairs, and not a hand was lifted to
prevent her. The three men smoked
In silence for five minutes, and then
Jerry Palmer heaved a sigh and said:
"Gents, It was a plan I thought out
In state's prison, and I won't go for to
say that there wasn't a hole In It."
"And I'm sayin'," added Mike Dono
van, "that when three gents can't tell
the difference between a rich man's
daughter and a gal that was at the
kitchen door beggin' for cold vittles
them three gents ought togo to stealin'
from pushcarts."
It was up to Tommy Saunders to ex
press himself, but he was slow about
It. When he did speak, all he said was:
"That's just like 'em! The rich nev
er will give a poor man a show!"
A PAGAN MYTH.
It Unkcd May and Matrimony With
UnhapplaMM and Mlafortune.
The pagans had a myth that "only
bad women murry iu May." They had
another—that If the marriage did take
place the couple would live most un
happily, and children bori* of the mar
riage—lf it was not hopelessly rendered
barren by thus slapping the fates In
the face—would be deformed or imbe
cile. With prizes like that In prospect
It Is not much wonder that the Igno
rant and superstitious taboo May mar
riages. but there Is no excuse yet for
this Idiosyncrasy of thinking people—
at least 110 sensible one.
Ovid was a firm believer In the su
perstition and said that no widow or
young girl would marry in May unless
she wished to invite the displeasure of
the gods and that the Imprudent wom
an who braved their wrath would fill
an early grave. Ovid pinned his faith
to rosy June, the birth month of June,
and when he got ready to launch his
daughter on the matrimonial sea he
studied the stars and all the supersti
tions to make sure that he would not
run upon Scylla in steering off Charyb
dls.
Resolved to match the girl, he tried to
find
What days unprosperous were, what
moonH were kind.
After June's sacred Ides his fancy stray
ed—
Qood to the man and happy to the maid.
THE TREE KILLER.
A CnriouM Vine That Flourishes In
Lower Central Amerlea.
One of the curious forest growths of
the Isthmus of Panama and lower Cen
tral America In general is the vine
which the Spaniards call matapalo, or
"tree killer." This vine first starts In
life as a climber upon the trunks of the
large trees, and, owing to its marvel
ously rapid growth, soon reaches the
lower branches. At this point it first
begins to put out its "feelers"—tender,
harmless looking root shoots, which
soon reach the ground and become as
firmly fixed as the parent stem. These
hundreds of additional sap tubes give
the whole vine a renewed lease of life,
and It begins to send out its aerial ten
drils in all directions. These lntwine
themselves tightly around every limb
of the tree, even creeping to the very
farthermost tips and squeezing the life
out of both bark and leaf. Things go
on at this rate but a short while before
the forest giant is compelled to suc
cumb to the gigantic parasite which is
sapping its lifeblood. Within a very
few years the tree rots and falls away,
leaving the matapalo standing erect
and hollow, like a monster vegetable
devilfish lying upon its back with Its
horrid tentacles clasped together high
in the air.
A Chapter of Accidents.
It was the upper deck of a London
bus. A passenger, a dignified person
age, lighted a cigar and threw the
match, us ho supposed, into the street.
A few seconds later he was surprised
to find that his umbrella was on fire.
At the same instant a sharp gust of
wind opened It and carried it, like a
flaming parachute, through the air.
Making a sudden grab after his truant
property, the passenger overbalanced,
plunged headlong over the omnibus rail
and after turning a somersault landed
upright ou the road unhurt.
Practical Preparation.
"I'm surprised that you favor higher
education," said the visitor to the vil
lage blacksmith.
"Well, the colleges are Improving," 1
explained the man of brawn. "Time 1
was when they didn't teach nothing but
book learning, but now by the time my
son gets through the athletic course <
he'll be fit for a first class blacksmith." <
—Detroit Free Press. I
I
Tronble on Another Score. (
Doctor—When can you p:iy me my
bill for curing you of Insomnia? Ta
tlcnt—l (lon't know, doc. 1 sleep so
soundly now that my wife (pes through j
my pockets most every night and takes j
everything —Life. _ _ ',
OUR NEW FALL LINE'
t ladies', Misses', Children's 1
COATS,
IBS, SIIBJI IS[
j Ladies' Coats from
s4.9B_up.
The Largest and Best Stock
to select from.
» EVERYTHING UP-TO-DATE
PEOPLES' STORE,
275-77 MILL STREET, - - DANVILLE
P 1 FARMERS AND DAIRYMEN!
112 ATTENTION!
Orders will be taken for a guaranteed
43 per cent. Protein Brand of Cotton
Seed Meal, delivered oft' the ear at Potts
grove, at a reduced price.
Send inquiries and orders by mail t
Pottsgrove. Persons having orders in
will be notified on arrival of the car
C. H. HcMahan & Bros.
Special Dairy Foods and Dairy Supplies, j
HAY AND FEED
Pottsgrove,S Northumberland Co., Pa.
OLD INDIAN PIPES.
Each Feather In a Stem Represented
an Enemy Slain.
It need scarcely be told that In the
pipes of long ago each feather append
ed to the steni represented an enemy
slain. If one doubted the record of
the war eagle feathers, the warrior
then showed the scalps of the enemy,
which were kept as a sort of a sacred
pjfoof of his word. Such pipes were
used only on occasions of peace and
war. Speaking roughly, the best pipes
of eastern tribes were In molded clay,
the best of the western tribes In slate
pipe stone taken from the famous quar
ry west of the Mississippi. Before the
great buffalo and antelope hunts, when
herds of game were driven Into a pound
or an Inclosed area of snares, It was
customary for the Indians to whiff the
incense of propitiation to the spirits of
the animals about to be slain, explain
ing that only the desire for food com
pelled the Indian to kill and that the
hunt was the will of the Master of Life,
or "Master of the Hearing Winds," who
would compensate the animals In the
next world. The pipes used for this
ceremony usually show the tlgure of a
man In conference with the figure of
an animal. Others show the figures of
Indians with locked hands. This typi
fies a vow of friendship to be termi
nated only by death. It was usually
between men, but sometimes between
a man aud a woman, In which case the
platonlc bond not ouly precluded, but
forbade, the very possibility of mar
riage. After that who shall say that
the stolid Indian has no vein of senti
ment In his nature?
One of the most ct—lous pipes I have
seen I bought from a Cree on a reser
vation east of the refugee Sioux. It Is
In the shape of a war hatchet, of a
metal which I do not know, though I
suspect it is galena mixed with clay,
the edge being sharp enough, but the
back of the ax being a bowl and the
handle a pipe stem. The odd lines In
Indian carvings and woven work are
not without meaning. Fighting Mlstab
could read a legend where we saw
nothing but bizarre mnrkings. There
were the circular lines, hollow down,
meaning clouds; the cross, meaning the
coming of the priest; the tree, a type
of peace with its branches overshad
owing the nations; the wavy line, sig
nifying water; the arrow, war. The
ordinary Indian can read a tribal song
or chronicle from obscure drawings on
the face of a rock or crazy colored
work ou a scraped buffalo skin.—Out
ing.
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
Be a gentleman, and some people
will not appreciate you.
Defeat Is often a good thing, as It
shows a man how little he amounts to.
If you want to enjoy the society of
people never become intimate with
them.
Rich men are hated and this Is the
reason: We poor people aro In the
majority.
The house Is too noisy for comfort
with a child In it and too lonesome
for comfort when the child leaves. And
there you are.
Every house owner should ask him
self this question tomorrow, "Is my
house a nuisance In the neighborhood?"
Look yourself over.
As a man gets older he finds that
the path from the cradle to the grave
is not near so long as it was from
soup to dessert when he was a child.—
Atchison Globe.
A Time Limit.
"I'm afraid you smoke too much for
your own good," said the physician.
"Well," admitted the patients "I do
smoke almost continuously from morn
ing till night."
"Why do you do that?" asked the
M. D.
"Because it's the only time I have to
■moke," replied the victim. "I have to
sleep at night."
The Intelligencer lias a class of cir
culation that makes advertising in its
columns rich with results. It has,
too, a quantity of circulation at rates
that mean grent profit to the person
Using the paper.
We still continue to give The Great
American Farm Journal to all of oursub
scribers who pay in advance. Think of
it. Two papers"for the price of one, and
only SI.OO, too.
Stationery for Formers.
Farmers and others, particularly those
1 living 011 the Rural Delivery route 1 ,
k should have printed stationery as well as
. business men. It is not only more busi
- ness like to send a letter with name and
j address printed on the notehead and en
• velope, but it insures the return of the
» letter in case it is not delivered. We
are especially well equipped to do this
1 class of printing and can do it promptly
and neatly. We will supply 250 note
heads and 200 envelopes, extra quality,
| for ♦1.50, or 75c for either one lot. Thie
is cheaper than you can buy the paper
► and envelopes regularly at retail stores.
VITALQIDS Cure Nervous Diseases.
LuAW&iltJ* —D r . Oidman's Prescription—
Strengthens the nerves, Builds up worn oat men
i and women. Frioe 60 Cts.
WANTED -BY CHICAGO MANU
facttiring House, person of lrust
worthiness and somewhat familiar
with local territory as assistant in
branch office. Salary $lB paid week
ly. Permanent position. No invest
ment required. Previous experience
not essential to engaging.
Address, Manager Branches, .Como
Block, Chicago. 1-29 06
AUDITOR'S NOTICE.
En/ate of Margaret Y. Grove, Late of Danville,
Montour County, Deceased.
The undere'gned auditor, appointed by the
Orphan's Court of Montour < ounty, to make
distribution of the balance in the hands of
the aeeouutant to and among tin* parties en
titled thereto, will sit to perforin the duties of
Ills appointment, at ills ofliee, 110 Mill Street,
Danville, rn., on Monday tlx* 11th., day of
December, A. I). IDOo, at 10 o'clock A. M.
when and where all parties Interested are re
quested to attend, or be forever debarred
from imy share of said fund.
HAL* 11 KISNER,
Danville, Fa., Nov. 0, luOj. Auditor.
The Goods for Fall
=— -
lAre beginning to arrive,
and each day sees new and
ehoice styles added to our
stock.
~<!r
T The Dress Goods
Department includes the best val
ues and choicest styles the
market affords.
If You are looking; for Flannelettes
We have dozens ot styles
that cannot Ire told from
the Wool Klanuels
Good selections of Blankets and Com
forts that are so much needed these cold
nights.
Prices are right in all departments,and
you will make a big mistake if you do
all your buying before coming to see us.
W. M. SEIDEL,
344 Mill Street.
Is Your Stomach Disordered ?
If It la, Indigestion naturally ensues: the kidneys
heroine closed with impurities that impair or stop
their secretory functions; the blood is vitiated ana
actually poisons the whole being. Let this goon to
its natural ending and the sure result is—(loath. The
one modicine that will arreet this fatal progress is
Dr. D. Kennedy's Favorite Remedy
which stimulates and strengthens the digestive j
organs, restores the secretory 112 unctions and speed- !
ily casta out the gathered impurities in the organs !
affected. If you have bad breath, sluggish bowels, |
pain in Ike back, discolored skin, nervousness or diz- I
sines*, you may be certain that your vital organs
are sadly out of condition and that
Your Only Wise Course
Is a medlclno that will cleanse your system of the
Imnurities that clog life channels and restore vigor
and health. Medical science proves that diseas.-s,
no matter how creat a variety, seem to proceed from |
comparatively few causes. It is for this reason that
some single medicines relieve or cure so wide a
range of complaints. When a medical preparation
acts at onco upon the digestive and urinary organs I
and also
Purifies the Blood
the list of difficulties subject to its control is aston- '
ishintr. It is conceded that l)r. David Kennedy's
Favorite Remedy is the most effective preparation
now in use for all diseases arising from a foul or im
pure state of the circulation. A persevering use of
Dr. David Kennedy's Favorite Remedy according to
directions, will soon relieve and ultimately cure
when no other medicine or treatment is of any
permanent benefit. x
Dr.D.Kennedy'sFavorite Remedy,
Prepared at Ron<l out, N. Y. I
Bold by all druggists. $1 a bottle; t for $5 '
PENNSYLVANIA 1
11 RAILROAD
| The Standard Railway 01 This
Continent
I PROTECTED THKOUGHUIT 11V THE
liiicrMiygSffitcli&BM :m Syslen
Schedule in Effect Nov. 29, 1903
il iiii't il \JAtll)
STATIONS A.M. A.M. P.M. P.*
Hunbury Uave | i 9 65 § 2 00 $ 520
Kline's (Jrove. 1«; ~>| Mooi I 685
Wolvertou I IK* fIOO6 112 2 10 i 6117
Kipp's Hull 17 (Ml 110 11 ~ .J --,44
South Danville ) ... lrt „ „ . rrt
IHIUVIIIO / ' ll 10 1' r '«>
i Hoy d 112 7 10 flO 21 1 2 2ft 1 6 58
t Roaring ('reek 112 7 23 fio 2K 12.(1 I 00L
) Catawlssa Arrive 732 101(0 'J : J .r> i;tl«
, Catawlssa Leave § 7 321 10 30 112 230 $ 008
I Fast Bluomiburg ... ) _ _ . .
i Bloomsburg j ' •*' -4.- '• 1»
I Kspy Ferry 112 7 12 flO 17 i (. 19
j Stonytown Ferry I7 50 flO 53 I« 27
! Lrensy .. 7Q2 10 00 2 -3d 030
iNc'Moncck Arrive l
Berwick . 112 81U 1105 3ft ' i;l °
Moarapw-K ..... Loavu § H(t>[ n or, j u nr. j mu
Beach Haven Ferry.. I's (Hi
I Wiipwallupcn KIII 11 -j<>" *i 20 lira
Pond Hill HiifliauiSioM
imckSy} «« »« » 701
Retreat 813 1112 310 710
Nantlcoke Bftl llfti ;; i» 716
Huttonwooil 1 smn» 112 00 l 3.V> 1 7 20
Plynioulli Ferry 112 DO2 11*202 I 3 ft? 1 7 28
South Wilkcs-Barre... 000 12 (Hi 400 730
Hnzle Htreet OOS 12 0* 403 733
Wllkes-Barrc... Arrive 010 12 10 400 735
d(£>2JV(ZIWA ill)
STATION'S A.M. A.M. P.M. I'.M
Wllkes-Bnrre...Leave $ 7 20 $ 10 85 I 2 10 | 0 00*
Ha/.le HI reel 728 10 37 21V 002
.South Wlikes-Barre.. 730 10 10 2At 005
Plymouth Ferry 1 732 112 10 12 112 2 2 I 007
Huttonwooil 112 7 35 112 1015 1 2,'J 1 0 00
Nantieoke. 712 10 .jO 301 017
Hetreat 751 ju 58 310 026
«». »<» 3,0 «8 7
Pond 11 ill fM.fi fll U 112 3 20 I 612
Wapwallopen 810 11 10 331 017
Heach Haven Ferry..
Nescopeck Arrive 818 11 26 842 700
Nescopeck Ijeave} islß 511i!042 §7 00
Creasy 8;{0 jj 30 7 yj,
Stony town Ferry I B:t3 111 38 . 3 01 I 7 12
Kspy terry. 812 111 in 1 irj r7 20
Uloomsburg > u
Fast BlooniNhurg J •' HSO 106 7 2ft
Catawlssa Arrive 855 11 57 113 732
Catawlssa Leave sftft 1157 413 732
Hoarlng Creek 112 001 fl2 06 1 I 10 1 7 39
Boyd 112 9 10 fl2 11 I 4 20 I 7 16
souTh'uVnviiie::::::} 5,11 « 15 4hi
Kipp's Hun 112 II P.I 112 12 20 112 I 30 112 7 56
Wolverlon f920f12 28 112 112 Is u.3
K line's (irove t 1127 112 12.50 112 110 I h IM»
Sun bury Arrive $ 935 §l2 40 11 .'>s |8 16
I Dally. ( Dally, except Sunday. I Stops
only on notice to Couducior or Agent, or on
signal.
Trains leave South Danville as follows:
For Pittston anil Scranton,7 II a m and 2 21
anil 050p ni week-days; 10 17 ain daily.
For Potlsville, Heading and Philadelphia
711 a in and 221 pin week-days.
For H-i/.ictoii, 7 11 a in and 2 21 and 550 p m
week-days.
For Lcwisburg, Milton, William sport, Lock
Haven, Henovo and Kane. 12 10 pin week
days ; Loek Haven only, 911 a m and 431 p m
week-days; for Williamsport and interiuodi
ate stations, 911 a in and 751 pin week-dwys.
For Heliefonte, Tyrone, Philllpsburg and
Clearlleld, 911 a in and 12 10 pin week-days.
For Hurrisburg and intermediate stations,
9 11 a m, 12 10 pin and 701 p m week-days ;
4 31 pm daily.
For Philadelphia (via Ilarrlsburg) Balti
more and Washington, 9 11 a m anil and 12 15
and 7 01 p ill week-days ; 4 31 p m daily.
For Pittsburg (via llarrisburg) n II a m and
7 51 p m week-days ; 1 31 p m daily ; (via Lew
istown Junet Ion) 11 a m and 12 10 pin week
days; (via Loek llaven) 9 11a in and 12 10 p c
in week-days.
Pullman Parlor and Sleeping Cars run on
through trains between Sun bury, Williams
port and Frie. between Sunbury and Plilln
delphia and Wasliingtou and between Harris
burg, Pittsburg and the Wist.
For further information apply to ticket
ageuts.
W. W. ATTFRBUKY, J. li. WOOD,
Ueneral Manager. l'ass'r Traffic Mgr '
OKO. W. BOYD, General Pass'r Agt.
FOH SALF-A SMALL FARM OF FOR
tv-six aeres, known as the Mauger farm
located 2 miles liorth-i'iist of Potlsgrovc.
Fair buildings, good fruit, water at house anil
barn. All cleared and under high state of
cultivation. This farm in-Mtt'ercd at private
sale and is a ties-ruble property. Will leave
j hay, straw and fodder oil the place. Posses
sion given this fall. Address,
L. o. KVKRITT,
It. F. I). 1. Pottsgrove, Pa.
Notice !
Notice is hereby given that W. 11. Dildlne
and 11. A.Snyder have formed a partnership *
under the name and style of the Peoples'
Telephone Construction Company, for the
purpose of building, equipping and operating
a telephone system to be known as the Peo
ples Telephone System. Faeli partner has
subscribed Five Hundred cOOO.tH)) do lars to
the Ten Hundred (?1000.00) dollars capital of
the partnership the same to be paid in by
each prorata as needed in conducting the
business of the partnership. Its duration
shall be for a period of six years. The HaMli
ty of both partners is limited to the i.m aint
subscribed by eaeli to the eapital of the part
nership in accordance with the act of May 9,
1899, PIL. ■-'«»!. Tin? articlc%of partnership
have been left fur record in the office of the
Recorder of Heeds of Montour county, Penn
sylvania.
Tired
Nervous
[When you feci languid, tired,
nervous and irritable, your vi-,
tality is low—your supply of
nerve energy exhausted, and
your system running down for
lack of power,
The organs of the'body iyc
working poorly, or not at all,
and you arc not getting the
nourishment needed. This soon
impoverishes the blood and in
stead of throwing off the im
purities, distributes it all
through the body. This brings
disease and misery.
Feed the nerves with Dr.
Miles' Nervine, a nerve food, a
nerve medicine, that nourishes
and strengthens the nerves, and
see how quickly you will get
strong and vigorous.
"My wife suffered with nervousness
previous to a recent attack of typhoid
fever, but after her recovery from the
fever, she was much worse, nnd could
hardly control herself being- exceed
ingly nervous when the least excited.
She was very restless at night, and
never had a good night's rest. She
also suffered much from nervous head
ache. Dr. Miles' Nervine was recom
mended by a friend. After the tlrst
three doves she had n good night's
rest, and at the end.of the llrst week's
treatment she was wonderfully Im- (
proved. Continued use of Nervine has
completed her entire cure."
OTTO KOLB,
1021 Cherry St., Evansville, Ir.d.
Dr. Miles' Nervine Is sold by your
druggist, who will guarantee that the
first Dottle will benefit. If it falls, he
v/ill refund your money.
Miles Medical Co., Elkhart, Ind
NMMTRUST
®Many newspapers have lately given currency
to reports by irresponsible purties to the effect
that
THE NEW HOME SEWING MACHINE CO
hail entered a trust or combination; we wish
to assure the public that there Is »<» truth in
such reports. We have been manufacturing
sewing machines for over a quarter of a centu
ry, and have established a reputation for our
selves and our machines that is the envy of all
others. Our Home*' machine has
never been rivaled as a family machine.—lt
stands at the head ofall If/?/« Wi'ade sewing
machines, and stands on its oiri* merits.
The ** 2l>ir Home." ia the only realty
HIGH Git A DJ? Setcina Machine ■
on the market.
It is not necessary for us to enter into a trust
to save our credit or pay any debts as we have
no debts to pay. We have never entered Into
competition with manufacturers of low grade
cheap machines that are made to sell regard
less of any intrinsic merits. Do not be de
ceived, when you want»». sewing machine don't
send your money away from home; call on a
"New Home" Dealer, he can sell you a
better machine for less than you can purchase
elsewhere. If there is no dealer near you,
write direct to us.
THE NEW HOME SEWING MACHINE CO
ORANGE, MASS.