16 I TUESDAY, AuG. 31, 2010
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`Sh*t My Dad Says'
Reviewed by Sky Friedlander
COLLEGIAN STAFF WRITER
This book made me laugh out loud on a bus.
Enough said.
But seriously, "Sh*t My Dad Says" is hilarious,
and if you follow Justin Halpern's Twitter feed
that evolved into this book it's for you. The bio
for the Twitter account reads, "I'm 29. I live with
my 74-year-old dad. He is
awesome, I just write down
shit that he says."
That pretty much sums
up the core of the book.
Each short chapter begins
with a quote from Halpern's
dad, Sam, and ends with
several quotes on varying
topics. These blurbs are so
quotable, it's ridiculous. I
read about 50 percent of the
book to my roommate while
I was reading it (it's short
176 pages and mostly quotes, so don't feel too
bad for her).
Unfortunately, the elder Halpern has a pen
chant to swear. All the time. Finding something
to quote was a bit challenging.
But Sam Halpern is so funny, I had to give it a
shot.
Some selections:
"The worst thing you can be is a liar... Okay,
fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but
then number two is a liar. Nazi one, liar two."
Then there's this gem:
"Pick your furniture like you pick a wife: It.
should make you feel comfortable and look nice,
but not so nice that if someone walks past they
want to steal it."
And then my favorite (at least that was fit for
print):
`Are you wearing perfume? ...Son, there ain't
any cologne in this house, only your mother's
perfume. I know that scent, and let me tell you,
it's disturbing to smell your wife on your thirteen
year-old son."
And if you think you have a good idea of what
Sam Halpern is like from those quotes, the chap
ters give an even better idea. They tell stories
from Justin's childhood and young adult life
from Justin's point of view _ _
They are embarrassing, funny and often mov
ing. There is clearly a lot of love between the
father and son, and the book conveys.
I appreciate the occasional seriousness of the
stories, because they temper the more raunchy
or mean quotes. It's not a one-dimensional book
intended only for cheap laughs it's about a
father and son and their relationship.
But it is funny as sh*t, too.
Grade: A
To e-mail reporter: safsl4B@psu.edu
`Teenage Dream'
Reviewed by Lindsay Cryer
COLLEGIAN STAFF WRITER
Katy Perry is living the dream.
Her second album, "Teenage Dream" dropped
last Tuesday and already has the pop music
world applauding
cue "California
Gurls" and
"Teenage
Dream."
We already
knew that Perry
was good really
good when she
broke ground with
her first hit "I
Kissed A Girl" and
. 1 1 2 k , ' • ...-
11%lip,
Courtesy of amazon.com
the releases of
"Hot N Cold" and "Thinking of You," which are
arguably the best uses of her voice thus far.
And the most prominent feature of the new
album is the versatility of her voice.
The album starts with "Teenage Dream,"
which not only reminds us why we love Perry, but
why she'll keep us begging for more.
Then comes "Last Friday Night," the newest
anthem for college girls.
Perry's basic, `Bos-esque sound is among the
most enjoyable uses of her vocals and in "Who
Am I Living For?" a more primal, emotive voice ,
comes out with a bang. _ .
Both of the songs are too good to listen to just
once.
Mothers everywhere will be covering the ears
of their young-ins once they hear the most
provocative track off the album, "Peacock."
Fewer than 10 secdnds into the song, it
becomes fairly evident that Perry isn't talking
about a colorful bird.
Raunchiness aside, the song is addicting with a
beat reminiscent of Toni Basil's "Mickey" that
will become the song that everyone is buzzing
And, frankly, if you like Perry sounding like a
badass, listen to "Circle the Drain."
But for those who appreciate of the strength of
Perry's alto voice in slower songs, don't get too
impatient during the first 11 tracks of the CD
it's still there.
"Not Like the Movies," the final track, will
quench your musical thirst. Her voice, again, is
phenomenal.
It would be of no surprise to me if all of these
songs are put to a stronger bass and remixed in
clubs and fraternities.
In the same breath, if 13-year-olds play these
songs at their glitter-themed parties, I wouldn't
be shocked either.
Perry proves that the warm spot left on the
pop princess throne is still hers and will be hers
for a while.
Grade: A
Download: "Peacock", "Last Friday Night",
"Who Am I Living Fbr?"
To e-mail reporter: Ibcl46@psu.edu
kept us going with
Crisp, 200 E. College Ave., is a relatively new addition to the State College restaurant scene and serves organic, healthy food
CRISP 'N' GREEN
Salad joint
Reviewed by Julie Mastrine
COLLEGIAN STAFF WRITER
Even in the happiest of
valleys, it's hard to resist the
temptation of the nearest
fast food restaurant when
you need a quick meal.
Like any other college stu
dent, I'll admit that it can be
difficult for me to make
healthy food choices when
I'm constantly berated with
the lure of cheaply priced
greasy, fatty foods.
Fortunately, one of the lat
est additions to State
College's downtown eateries
breaks through the sea of
less-than-healthy tempta
tions. Crisp, 200 E. College
Ave., boasts an impressive
menu of healthy food
options, including salads,
wraps, soup, smoothies,
fresh juice and more.
Though the restaurant
does have pre-made wraps
and salads to choose from,
they also offer a create-your
own option. After all, who
doesn't love to customize
their food?
The employees at Crisp
WALKING THE RED
Awards fashion lacking
were kind and walked me
through my first experience
at the eatery, showing me
how to create my own salad.
Lettuce is already divided
into individual pre-portioned
containers of romaine,
mixed greens or spinach
Each plastic container
includes a sticker that lists
all of the available salad top
pings, and trust me, there
are many: mandarin
oranges, edamame, feta,
sunflower seeds, portabella
mushrooms, almond slivers,
bacon bits, beets and much
more.
After checking off the top
pings you want, the employ
ees mix your salad together
in a larger bowl before
returning it to your to-go
container.
Though my salad was
completely healthy and deli
cious, there was one factor
that prevented me from fully
enjoying my creation the
price.
Crisp charges $6 for a
large salad, and then
charges the customer per
topping after that a huge
tasty, costly
budget breaker if you're the
type who likes to spice up
your salads with a lot of top
pings, like me.
Though you can choose
four free toppings from a
small list, you'll have to pay
for the really good stuff
adding chicken to my salad
cost $2.50 alone.
One of my friends sug
gested that Crisp charge you
for your salad according to
weight instead.
In total, a large salad and
a small iced coffee cost me
$11.67, a little pric
poor college stun
Of course,
there may be
other factors thal
influence the
steep prices
Crisp serves
mostly organic
food, which tend:
to be more costl:
felt uneasy about
more than $lO on a small
meal, knowing I was helping
the environment was some
what of a comfort.
Another thing Crisp gets
right is atmosphere the
THE DAILY COLLEGIAN
eatery is small and doesn't
offer much seating, but it's
well decorated and laid-back.
Crisp also has seating out
side, so it's the perfect place
to enjoy a healthy meal while
you study or people-watch.
Because of the high
prices, people with a slim
budget may have trouble
making a visit to Crisp a
daily or weekly routine.
But those who will miss
the healthy food options of
Simmons Dining Hall when
it closes will
options and everyt
unbelievably fresh
Grade: B-
To e-mail reporter:
jamsB7s@psu.edu