PAGE EIGHT
Ike Engineer Began This Fight;
Collegian Will Win It, Naturally
Somewhere, buried deep in the musty darkness of the Armory lies the head and
heart of that useless .publication, the Penn State Engineer.
We sent a man over to actually discover the location of this den of evil and ill fame;
but he came back after three days of searching through the basements and sub-cellars with
not a clue, not even one moss-grown old slide rule. So we asked around campus about the
Engineer, and here we give you a strictly unbiased report.
Apparently they don’t believe in paying off their staff
at all, unless you count the
old trolley transfers and worn
collar buttons you occas
ionally find some engineer try
ing to .pass off. Instead they bribe
them into working by feeding
them steak once a month, and
looking at some of their agents we
think they have a hard time wait
ing for the days to roll by till the
. next meal. (There was one person
, we knew, poor fellow died just
the other day, who couldn’t quite
..wait out the calendar this time.—
'it was pitiful to see him lurching
about the streets chewing on a
frazzled slide rule case.)
Slide-Rule Brawl
■Each year, or even oftener if
times are tough, they throw_ a
feeble rat race known as the slide
rule bawl. The two or three worn
and crumpled dollars gouged out
of an unsuspecting public by this
fraud are divided among the vet
erans of the sWt. Th-" a
week maybe hunger is pushed into
the background and -they launch
a vicious and virulent attack
against the best paper on campus.
(Yeah, we know we’re the only
paper; but they’re the only en
gineering magazine.)
As a magazine, or unreasonable
facsimile thereof, the Eng. (let’s
shorten it so we can say more
nasty things in less space) is
supposed to make money. Natur
ally it doesn’t. At least if it does
they are afraid to publish the
amount. We looked up the Eng.
in. the annual financial report of
student activities. It wasn’t there.
Money or A Magazine
■Now that leads to one of two
conclusions:—(a) they have no
money—which is easy to believe,
or (b) they aren’t even a pufoli
•cation—which also looks good
when the facts are recognized. So
what is this campus agitator but
an empty front f.or some terrible
subversive group probably a
throwback to the Molly Maguires
of the last century.
A little while back the Eng.
was all excited over expansion.
They were going to get lots of
room to-store their dead bodies
and worn out jokes in. They were
going to get at least 15 square
feet of additional floor space.
They got, instead, fooled. In a
rush of excitement they moved
from one dark and dreary closet
to another: —only the new closet
bad running water-.
Eng. Personnel
• Enough on the Eng. as a whole,
now on to the personnel. The
mess is edited by “Red-Rims”
Griffith. ME 6. Some people think
this nickname refers to her eyes,
red-rimmed from study. Actually
it enshrines forever in the minds
of a grateful college that memory
of her devastatingly ghastly red
framed glasses.
Ignoring the business manager,
we come to the dm'ling of the
Eng., Mef Field. Early in the
morning she rises, cheerful and
chattering. Late in the evening
she retires. still chattering.
Everyone she greets with a
happy, “hiya there”, delicately
slurred so as to remain perman
ently unrecognized if we hadn’t
•done research on the subiect.
Sifting further down the staff,
we find ourselves inspecting Cu
pid’s little helper, or “don’t-you
think - they’d - make - a - nice
looking - couple.” A. Pfahler. This 1
younff woman also runs under the
pseudonym of “Eyebrowless An
nie”. A traitor in the Eng’s ranks
told us that she tears out her eye
brows when studying; so, of
course, it must be true. (You
know, just about here they could
start sueing us for libel; but you
can see how they couldn’t afford
to bring suit, at least not on the
profits they make. Of course, they
SALLY'S
could levy a fee on all the en
gineering students next semester
—but we’ll fight it to the Su
preme Court.)
Flash-Dickstein
Finally we find some men on
the staff. “Beetlebrain” Bennett,
socializer Dickstein and drama
critic Lennig are fine examples.
Mr. Bennett, a well-known figure
in the manufacturing of pot-bel
lied stoves, photographer Dick
stein, and squeaky Lennig, just a
figure, are the real glamour boys
oi the Eng. Especially friend Mar
tin, with his red plaid hat, and
the “guy from out west”, who
scrounges around bumming cigar
ettes.
But now enough. It is obvious
what the Eng. really stands for,
really is, and really does. So you
as intelligent, well-informed col
lege men and women can choose
for yourself whether you’ll read
and believe the distorted, .point
less, futile mouthings of the cam
pus disgrace or take for your own
the fearless, truthful, and for
ward-looking Collegian. We give
you the facts. The choice,is up to
you.
Letter To Editor
Dear Editor:
I’M BITTER!
A great injustice is being per
petrated against a very important
group of veterans .by President
Hetzel’s priority system for ad
mission to the College. Imagine
putting fighting men at the very
bottom of the list merely because
they had postponed their college
education in order to serve their
country!
Ex-GI'S Deserve Education
Overlooking these men, many'
of whom have lost 3 or more years
while contributing so nobly to the
successful termination of the war,
indicates a lack of knowledge or
concern about their plight, if oth
er colleges use similar discrimin
ating tactics, a large proportion_pf
these highly-deserving men will;
be so embittered and discouraged
that they will never obtain their
well-deserved college education.
Any fair-minded person knows
that the majority of servicemenj
have sacrificed and contributed
mox-e to the war than those in the j
ASTP, V-12, and AAIF programs.
Furthermore, it is my sincere be
lief that as a group, the vets who
enlisted without college attend
ance, have served longer and have
lost more time than those who
left Penn State or other cplleges. i
Service Should Count |
To get specific and personal, if j
my discharge had come one' month '
later than it did (thus freeing me
too late for admittance this se- j
mester) my chances of entering j
in March would be nil, in spite of ,
my 4V& years of Naval service, in
cluding over 2 M> years of sea duty.
On the other hand, my brother,
whose 8 months of service was
entirely Stateside duty, has an ev
en chance of being accepted for
the Spring semester, just because
he spent one semester at the Col
lege.
Surely, more consideration could,
and should, be granted those with
three or more years of service,
but without any college credits.
Don’t they at least rate preference
over former members of ASTP,
V-I'2. and AAF units, transfers,
and Penn State vets in the lower
semesters who have served less
than a year, or ■ entirely in this
country?
Sincerely,
Fortunate Freshman
THE COLLEGIAN
Hori Club Reorganizes;
Elects Duel I President
Hort Club was officially re
organized in December and offi
cers were elected for the semes
ter!
iColman Duell was elected pres
ident of the organization. Other
officers are Cecil Bussler, vice
president; Betty Nix, secretary;
and Glenn Lease, treasurer.
Inactive for several years, Hort
Club was reorganized for the
purpose of enabling horticulture
students to become better ac
quainted with ■ each other and
with their faculty associates.
First Jeep—
(Continued from vage one)
acts.”
Trudy’s waiting for summer so
she can drive with the jeep’s top
down, although she and Bob
haven’t quite figured out how to
get it down yet. That might sim
plify the problem of getting in and
out, since the door handle is a
confusing little mechanism that
locks into the canvas top.
Fee Deposit-
(Continued from page one)
they were for payment of fees.
The cashier will accept payment
only when the housing question
naire is complete and after checkr
ing the matriculation number.
The student will then be given a
receipt which contains all the
pertinent information concerning
refunds.
“It is extremely important that
the housing form be filled out
carefully and completely as this
is primarily a housing census,”
said Hoffman.
Students who pay the deposit
and fail to return for the spring
semester will forfeit the .money.
Only in the case of death in the
family, failure to pass, or the
draft, etc. will the amount foe re
funded. All cases of refund are
at the discretion of the registrar.
Students who fail to pay this de
posit as scheduled and later de
cided to apply for readmission will
probably be place at the bottom
of the priority list. This includes
students who want to stay out a
semester.
The amount of the deposit will
foe credited to the student’s bill
for the spring semester. Veterans
enrolled under th G. I. Bill of
rights will have their deposit re
funded about March 11, 1946.
§OlO3
LAST TIMES TODAY
. . . TOMORROW . . .
EDDIE CANTOR
“KID FROM SPAIN”
Return Engagement
Our Next Attraction
L -.JOHN WAYNE
« -VERA HRUBARALSTON/iT
- WALTER BMNNAN ‘-Tf!
ceY * •»“’*
German Food Situation
Depends On U.S.—Keith
iFood must be imported into the leave the people in Bavaria with ?
American zone of Occupied Ger- little pork this winter. •-!
many if the people are to escape Beef cattle are raised'in Ba- '
starvation this winter, although V aria and the lack of shipping!
the situation is somewhat better facilities out of Bavaria will pat-?
than popularly supposed. tially conpensate for the pork'j
That, in short, is the opinion of shortage there. Some beef is|
Dr. Thomas B. Keith, associate shipped to the American zone off
professor of animal husbandry at Berlin to alleviate a critical food*
the College, who recently return- situation ■ there, Dr.. Keith said.l
ed from Bavaria where he served Sheep raising is off about ten pefr.?
as a commissioned officer in the cent in the American, zone. . 3
G-5 (Military Government) sec- One item that was critically?
tion of the Third United States short, according to Dr. Keith, was*
Army headquarters. salt. No stocks had been accumu-.i
People in the rural areas will
be able to provide themselves
with sufficient food for the win
ter, he says, but those in Berlin
and in other urban areas of the
American zone will be largely de
pendent upon help from other
areas. Little gardens, similar to
our victory gardens, have pro
vided food for many families.
'Prior to the defeat of the Nazis
the German civilian was allowed
2000 calories of food per day, Dr.
Keith points out. With the com
plete disruption of the transpor
tation system and the disorgani
zation that followed the end of
the war, this figure was decreased
'to 800 calories. It now has been
raised to 1550 calories.
1000 Calories Per Person
• It. is estimated that present food
supplies in the American zone of
Occupied Germany will provide
1000 calories per person until the
next crop is-harvested in the fall.
The potato crop last year was
very good, Dr. Keith explained,
but there is a shortage of fats.
This is largely due to a lack of
coal which is needed to' extract
oils from the rape seed.
The majority of hogs are raised
in the British and Russian zones,
he, reported, and border barriers
and lack of transportation, will
TUESDAY MORNING, JANUARY 8, 1946
la ted, he found, and the cripp-i
ling of the transportation system,
left many sections without this?
very important product. -.c
Marcson To Address
Teacher's 'Convention
Dr. Simon Marcson,
professor of sociology, will
a joint'meeting of the North
Community Council and'the PemiSkjf
sylvania Federatibn of
at Philadelphia on January
'He will speak on “The; Treat-YS
ment of Minorities
His talk will :be based on
conducted at 'Harvard University
during his leave last year!' "
Capt. Phillip A. Mark
... of Campus Patrol
students who brought; their -aiit'o‘4S
mobiles to the campus
tion that student licenses are'comilil
pulsory and can 'be bought in 32ifte|
Old Main for $.25. Students ;whs!
have, already purchased their?;tag&i|j
are requested- to display ;, 'theirfi>i .|^
’ 'WA..NE.. R THE. .5
BUY WAR BONUS AMD STAMPS-HtR»
today & Tomorrow
I 1
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