' PAGE TWO
THE COLLEGIAN
"For A Bolter Penn State"
Established 1040. Successor to Ihe Penn State Colleg
ian, oslablisUerl 1904, and the Free Lance, established
1877
Published every Tuesday and Friday morning dur
ing the regular College year by the staff of the Daily
Collegian of the Pennsylvania State College. Entered as
leeond class matter July 5. 1934, at the State College, Pa.,
To,at Office under tlie act of Mar.ch 8, 1879.
Subscriptions by mail at ?1 a semester.
Ediior-Xsi'-CMe.? Business Manager
| Woodeme Bel Mary Louise Bavey
| Managing Editor Advertising Manager
Peggie Weaver Rosemary Ghantous
EDITOKIAI. STAFF
Mews Editor .
Women's Editor
Feature Editor
{•ports Editor
Senior Board .
graduate Counselor
staff this issue
Waiiaffing Editor
Coni' E-.lit.or;> ....
11 own Editor
mirthy of Office ?
Two weeks ago Cabinet attempted to remedy
the low attendance it meetings by demanding
that ex-officio, members miss not more than three
consecutive meetings, or have their organization
suspended from Cabinet.
But it seems that the Cabinet was barking up
the wrong alley. At the last meeting only four
voting members (class presidents or their repre
sentatives) were present. As a result, absolutely
-nothing could be done at the meeting without a
voting quorum,
Class presidents should feel enough responsi
bility not only to, attend Cabinet meetings, but
toi do something constructive after they get there.
Their classmates had enough confidence to vote
them into office, but now it is up to the class of
ficers to prove that tliey are qualified for the po
sitions.
So- far this semester the discussion at Cabinet
meetings has been dominated by ex-officio mem
bers, who. do not have a vote. President Van (Lun
dy practically has to beg the class presidents to
enter into the discussions.
'.Phis situation, is degrading to Cabinet. And un
less the persons concerned do something about it,
Penn State will see new class officers, or per
haps even a new political party, in power next
smester.
"Vacation! Hasn’t Started-Yet
When are you, a student, beginning your
Christmas vacation?
College Senate has decreed vacation for Christ
mas will begin Saturday at noon, thus lengthen
ing the originally scheduled holiday by six days,
'Hie College lias been more than lenient in con
sidering the students’ wishes regarding lengthy
vacations, despite the fact that it is still operat
ing on the accelerated program. It is hoped the
same students will not take advantage of the Col
lege’s effort to, provide the longer vacation by
cutting classes.
In addition to the prolonged Christmas vaca
tion, a Thanksgiving holiday was granted. Also a
revision of the College calendar makes allow
ance for a spring vacation and a nine-day Easter
vacation. 'Students during the war years had no
vacation at Easter.
Furthermore, trains and busses will be jammed
by other early Christmas travelers. And the last
few days before the evacuation commences usu
ally: spells fun, especially with Christmas in the
air. So. why not wait for that legal vacation to
begin? —FT
lie
STEAKS . .
■jat.ering m banquets abb private parties
Gloria Nerenberg
... Patricia Turk
Mervin Wllf
George Sample
Barbara Ingraham, Audrey Ryback
Lois "Marks
M.arilynn Jacobson, Suzanne McCauley
Leo KorafeM
HORACE. COFFEE SHOP
CHOPS
SEAFOOD , . ,
Penn Statements
- We were all packed and ready to leave Satur
day with gay thoughts o£ an extra week to Christ
mas shop and sleep. Oh, well, it was a great ru
mor while it lasted, wasn’t it? Too bad the high
er authorities decided we are immune to the
epidemic, even with the dispensary and the in
firmary bulging.
A New Allergy
All kinds of queer things have been happen
ing at the dispensary lately. The other day a co
ed came in with a terrific facial rash which had
spread to her lymph gland. Investigation proved
that she had been dating a lie-man with a parti
cularly tough beard for six nights straight, and
she was suffering from a severe case of whisker
burn. To relieve the poor coed’s misery he tried
shaving just before he saw her each night, but
still her lymph gland swelled and swelled. Even
whisker burn can’t kill true love, and- our blue
beard now carries a heavy white handkerchief
to protect his lady’s face.
Please
Louis Bell
Since the beginning of the semester IE 409
students have been overcome with curiosity about
the meaning of a lonely PLEASE inscribed in
black paint on the classroom tables. They thought
of please, don’t sleep with your mouth open,
please, don’t throw spitballs, or please come to
class. Came the point where they absolutely had
to know the answer or stop looking at the infuri
ating PLEASE. Professor Bullinger walked off
with the $64 by explaining that the drawing
classes ask us un-artistic souls to PLEASE not
scratch on the tables.
Crossing the Bar
Clever is a Penn. State coed’s parody on Cross
ing the Bar. Polly Stramara calls her version
Saturday Night Dale at Penh States
Sunset and evening star
A date with you for me
And may there be no groaning at the bar
When I am there with thee.
Two drinks and I wish for sleep
Too full of liquid foam
I cannot walk, but I can creep
Safely to my home. .
Twilight and Old Main bell
We drank up all the stock
And now for a quick farewell
h is almost 1 o’clock.
Next day. whatever the time -or place
With my senses below par
I dread to see you face to face
After we stood at the bar.
Reserved For Women
Have you seen the new addition to Atherton
Hall? It seems the Sigma Chi’s got playful and
had their pledges erect a small building with a
slanted roof and a rear window complete with a
RESERVED FOR WOMEN sign. The pre-initia
tion relic graces the main court of Ath, leaving
coeds to wonder if they really are retrogressing
to ye olde days when conveniences were a lux
ury. Next week comes the Reserved for (Men edi
fice.
Eleanor. Holmes Peters
It happened at a rehearsal of the Flayers’ pro
duction of “The Curse of Gold.” Director Nelms
was explaining to Libby Peters (Tom Grey) how
to play the scene ®f her dramatic rescue of Fritz
Troutman (Keno) from the wild seas. The night
was stormy and the sea growing rougher and
rougher as the cast caught the mood. Finally a
tiny weak voice piped up, as Libby) ventured, “I
hate to interrupt, but I can’t swim.”
W. ©&lieg@ /A-V'e.
SANDWICHES ■ . , ,
THE COLLEGIAN
By PEGGIE WEAVER
A Lean and Hungry Look
Dear Brutus:
With the yule log burning in the fireplace (the furnace broke
down) and a Tom and Jerry to warm my innards, I am making up my
Christmas list. Yes. old Cassius is going to breafi down and give out
gifts to worthy souls around the frigid Nittany Valley.
To the anti-social members of Judicial, I give a 100,000 lumens
searchlight and a Junior G-Man
Kit to aid them on their never
ending search for wayward coeds
lurking in dark corners, the golf
course, and Hort Woods,
If possible, I hope that Santa
will bring to the residents of the
“homes on wheels,” another pair
of kidneys or stronger legs for
THAT 100-yard dash.
Knowing from past experience
that teaspoons are a ibit inconve
nient for the jab, I’m going to send
snow shovels to all fraternity
pledges. You will be needing
them.
•Realizing their desperate need,
members of “Cupid’s Corner” will
find something masculine under
their Christmas trees. Anything
with pants on will do.
•And as for the “slackers,” long
woolen underwear is the most ap
propriate -present. Personally, I
think they would appear just as
miserable in slacks as in itchy
drawers.
(For their first holiday season at
home, Cassius suggests something
blonde, blue-eyed, luscious, and
with all the trimmings to fill the
ex-Gls’ stockings. Happy hunting,
fellows, and you know what I
mean.
A bunch of keys would make
many would-be BMOCs happy.
And for their eager-beaver, famie
seeking brothers, the aspirant hat
men, a Stetson fedora to tide them
TUESDAY,' DECEMBER 18, 1945
over ’til their friends admit them
to the “select” group.
To the Delta Chi girls, window
shades or blinds will ,be my yule
offering so that they may once
again regain their lost modesty.
And for their PiKA neighbors, a
radar set to replace the obsolete
telescope.
The NRtOTC boys would ho
doubt like to have a new mop to
use for the coming two months.
More elbow grease, swabjockeys!
A most suitable gift for the
“blue-blooded” Thetas and the
“heart-throbbing” Kappas would
be a bulldozer to knock dawn
their men in a manner more sub
tle than usual.
One thing that the Engineer
would really need is a calendar.
Maybe if they had one they could
get that rag out on schedule.
Bill 'Reutti. can certainly use a
hope chest in which he can store
his lipstick - smeared, perfume
scented fan mail.
Practically a necessity for the
typical lazy Liberal Artist is aii
alarm clock to arouse the poor kid
for a 1 o’clock class. Of course,
only on (Monday, Wednesday, and
Friday would it toe used. '■ ’
To political parties, some con
structive ideas for their platforms.
They certainly need some. '
(But the number one item on my
list is a diploma for Jim Casey.
The poor iboy may never see one
otherwise.
—CASSIUS