P§ iatly % (Ml
VOL. 41—No. «T7f *7 <X
Staff Takes Busman's Holiday; Women Drive
Falcon Tells New
Campus Sob Story;
Can't Lick Stamps
Red-haired Drive Head
Saves Vanilla Till Last
By ALICE R. FOX
“I wanna lick stamps,” Rube M.
Faloon, big man about campus and
chairman of the Red Cross lick
’em for victory campaign, sobbed
last night in an exciusive-to-the-
Collegian interview.
With tears falling into the bas
ket of bills on his desk and a
catch in his voice, the most elig
ible bachelor who isn’t one told
the sad story of the Red Cross on
ca^npus.
“Cissel made the drawing of the
Axis boys and we promised. we’d
cover it with Red Cross stickers
and it’s got to be covered and it
isn’t getting covered and if we
don’t cover it we’ll look foolisb
and so people have to give more
dollars so that tye can lick more
stamps,” Rube explained.
A count of the bills in the basket
, revealed that the total at present
is- something like - $2,000. The
• counting, however, involved some
• the Collegian reporter, since Fa
.. loon, like ordinary people, has only
10 fingers.
.“I .have licked only 900 stamps,”
R.M.F. revealed dully, sticking out
his tongue so we .could see the
blisters. “To.get them covered I’ll
have to lick 1;000 more and I can’t
do it till people kick in with the
extra money.” v .
' Thoroughly believing that no
one could be unselfish enough to
give so much time even to the
'. Red .1 Cross without getting any
thing out of it, the Collegian
searched for an ulterior motive in
the chairman’s devotion to char
; (Continued On. Page Three)
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnniiiiiiiiiiii
11 O'CLOCK
IiICKUPS
.■ iiiiiiiiimiiiiiiiiiiimiiiiiiiiiiiiiiHiiiiiiiiiiiuiiiiiiiiimiii'
■ -CAMPUS.— Phi Gamma Delta’s
'.■. High Command announced last
: ' night-that surprise moves the last
. few . Saturday nights on Beta Theta
.•■'•"/Phi’s beer guzzlers put the. Phi
V‘ Gams on the offensive for the first
../ '. time." since, the: beginning of the
/./ battle .in:. 1888: ~ • "
/-: ■ ; CORNER 'ROOM.— Last night
4i; reports show more coed reconnais
/. . sance forces sweeping, the Corner
Room-surveying the. Army Air
:• Corps' situation. Communiques
from the coed forces report hopes
for marital victories rising. ■
DEAN RAY'S HEADQUAR
TERS.—Dean Charlotte E. Ray
•announced last night of a surprise
attack on the Army Air Corps bar
racks 48, formerly the KDR house.
Only gain reported was the cap
ture of Commander Campbell’s
epaulets.
FROTH. Enemy forces an
nounced, last night due to obsolete
humor in all parody issues of
Froth, Daily Collegian staff mem
. bers will be asked to donate their
services to the next issue.
'Please Let Me Lick The Last 1000/ Faloon Begs
For All Fools And The Women
THURSDAY MORNING, APRIL 1, 1943, STATE COLLEGE, PA,
'Oh Where, Oh Where
Can Cissel's Dog Be!'
Echoes Over Campus
(Late Bulletin—lt came back!)
Bill Cissel, former All-College
champion party thrower on a
small scale who has gone in for
bigger, things in the way of Dry
Dock, again sent a frantic appeal
in his Collegian communique last
night for somebody, anybody, to
let him know the whereabouts of
his pet and star, a red Chow
puppy. .
If the dog. doesn't return by Sat
urday,-Dry Dock will carry on
without-her, but something will be
lacking/the:head stevedore of the
campus amusement port assured
us. Cissel revealed that he fears
for the animal’s sanity, explaining
that she has been subject to fits of
melancholia since the advent of
meat’*rationing.
• Although Dry Dock will still be
what'.iS 'known in the . Pugh street
vemEjt’ular as dry, the top boy said
that this week’s offering/will "not
be scr 1 bone-dry as. the last, attempt
since'.a new attraction in the way
of'soft drinks'will be offered.
MY DAY -- -
Told Foolishly by
! DEAN A; R. WARNQCK —
To Sally Hirshborg
/"Since . spring has , blossomed
forth on this campus I have done
nothing- but meet with, a few
friends and feel thoroughly twit
terpated. My, how time does fly—
April 1 has actually arrived—
hasn’t it?
i Today a very serious affair was
[brought to my attention. It con
cerns five young ladies who went
to the Doggies. A very painful
subject, this, as'l ‘am forced to de
‘ icide- upon their' fate. I can see
myself spending many sleepless
nights while the pro battles the
! con in my mind. To set an exam
ple to other animal lovers—the cul
prits should be expelled. I do hope
11 come to the right decision.
Successor To The Free Lance, Established ISS7
OF TflE PENNSYLVANIA STATE COLLEGE
Staff Has Last Fling Before
Service Calls Deplete Ranks;
Few Toasts, Many Roasts
Tody’s issue of the Daily Collegian is more than a traditional
women’s issue. It’s a busman’s holiday for the entire staff.
It doesn’t indicate, as it has in the past, that women have been
held back, that they have been limited to writing for one page, or
that they don’t have the opportunities to act as daily managing or
news editors. Changes made in the current semester have brought
about a situation exactly suiting the desires of coeds all through Col
legian history.
This issue is the last of one series and. possibly the first of an
ther. Bugle calls and service summons have put Collegian among the
the ranks of Ibose that war has
reversed so completely. Women
will necessarily be editing the. pa
per alone in the near future.
The staff put put a paper as
usual; But they did it against all
rules, regulations, and good- na
tures of campuseers. Forgive
them. It’s a last fling before war
really strikes the entire male staff
down.
Ned's WSSF Drive
Bursts Forth Today
By GLO WHYEL
April 1 marks- the beginning of
spring showers and also the begin
ning of a drive for showers of
donations for the World Student
Service Fund. Yeah, the PSCA’s
sponsoring this, too.
PSCA executive bored with G.
B. Maxwell Stein holding .the
gavel, WSSF committee members
and also Pete and Ned have, been
for tile shell to explbde "so they
could spout forth fast and furi
ously about the WSSF campaign.
Plans and programs have been
revised and rewritten for two
months, and now the great day
for fools has arrived:
Through the WSS Fund, men in
prison camps and students from'
bombed universities may keep 1
digging in and continue their edu-1
cation. Examinations (those little
books with blue covers) are do
nated from ' leading universities
throughout Europe .and England.
All- contributions will aid Amer
ican boys, who were drafted while
perusing knowledge, to get their
degrees. : : j
. Ned said he wants all men (if
that is what they ..are called) to
buy fed carnations:;in the Corner
:Room/today for their favorite co
eds'. The red carnation is the
symbol of the campaign, so rush to
buy one and provefyou are a loyal
WSSF contributor./
■: After returning.\from an inspec
tion tour of Engineering G; I found
several adjutants/waiting to dis
cuss the latest : , problems concern
ing the pre-pre-pre flighters, new
est influx on campus, you know.
•Do you remember the first lines
of their theme song?
“Off we go into the wild blue
yonder . . .” Charming, isn’t it?
I seem to hear that tune constant
ly. Must be spring fever. Must dis
cuss this in “My Daily Half Col
yum.” . :
Solicited for jjtfi-s. Hetzel’s loan
fund outside the; Corner Room this
afternoon.
At tea .with Myrtle Ma Gargle,
I reviewed the .history of Centre
Hall. I had a long discussion .with
Mr. Ebert concerning the big stink
raised by one of his ground crews.
What a day! :
By JANE H. MURPHY,
Editor This Issue
It was a joint fling. The gals
gave the orders and' wrote the
big stories and the men printed
what they’ve been kidding the
women about these past months.
They met coed leaders, interview
ed woman directors, made fun of
.-female
for' a' ride.
Few are the toasts and many
the roasts, but t day is All Fools’
Day and the Daily Collegian staff
ain’t proud.
Lunceford Will Knock
'Em Dead At Bali
Sez Hicks & Swope
Attention, music lovers!
Carl P. Swope, one of the star
studded actors who helped slit
Walt Price’s throat in one of the
biggest shows this campus has ever
seen, and Bob (no.'compensation)
Hicks proudly present Jimmie
Lunceford and his orch. in what
they say is the last big dance of
the year.
Jimmie Lunceford with his fa
mous tempo de hep characterized
by a dashing tail gate smudge
pomp, smear swing out with stuff
that is solid in the gutter or groove,
’tis said.
- The famous Dixie Land Draf
.tees will play tmusic that will
make listeners want to clap their,
hands wildly—against Lunceford’s
face.
Lunceford has played in such
noteworthy spots as. the Rio Dance
Room in Atlas, Pa.; Joe’s Jivin’
Joint in Ramshankle, Kansas; and
has even entertained at the Kappa
Theta Omega formal initiation
dance.
Swope and Hicks feel that hav
ing Lunceford here is one of the
greatest steps forward that Penn
State has made since coeds were
given regular hours.
The co-chairmen invite all those
who enjoy dancing to the tune of
four dollars per to the affair.
Those who can’t dance are- asked
to attend the Penn State Club
dancing classes (see page 4).
By RITA BELFONTI
Too Warm
for
Girdles!
PRICE: THREE CENT,'}
Army and Navy i
Exams Scheduled
For Tomorrow
Navy VI, V-7 Members
Must Report for Orders
By LEE LEARNER
We don't think the Army and.
Navy will appreciate April Fool
games, so this is the only news
we're giving you straight, kids*
Can you take it?
Army A-12 and Navy V-12 ex
ams will be given in 121 Sparks
for names from A-R, and in 109
Ag Building for names from R-Z,
at 9 o’clock tomorrow morning,
Robert E. Galbraith, FAWS, an
nounced yesterday.
Admission will be by identifica
tion application blanks which are
obtainable in 243 Sparks no later
than 5 p.m. today.
Navy V-l. V-7
Only about 10 of the 50 men in,
Naval V-l and V-7 programs have
reported to 243 Sparks to get their
orders for immediate action from,
the Navy Department, Galbraith
also stated.
. .£hose who do not pick up their
1^i ®Sss■‘'ti6i^^ subject
to reprimand by Naval authorities
if the blanks are not returned as
ordered.
Army Air Corps
Thus far only 25 men have in
dicated their desire to apply for
the Army Air Corps, but if the
(Continued On Page Three)
Get the Lowdown
On Seniors' Dough
We’re going to put you on the
“in” about all this money that:
people have rumored is being dish
ed out for senior class committees.
Gee, kids, you’ve got to stop be
lieving these dreadful, nasty ru
mors, that’s all.
Wally “Cheerful” Murfit really
made out. Big Stuff Faloon put
him in charge of Caps and Gowns
for the senior class. Not that he
has any pull with the big shots or
anything evil like that but $7O is
enough to pay anybody’s house
■bill at the DU house. ’Course, there
isn’t any more DU house, so it’s all
.o.k.
Harry “Creepy” Coleman'is-go
ing to see that, all seniors .send
invitations .to all their fond rela
tives. That is a plenty, tough" job
and for his efforts he will profit
$6O worth. But everything is . all
right about that ,too, ’cause he
married and quite possibly prexy
wanted to make sure the rent was
paid. See, kids, everything is on,
the up and up just like in other
years.
Now then there is the Lions Coat
committee and their duty is to -see
that . . . Well, anyhow they have
a big job ahead of them. Walt
“Sexy” Gerson, Jerry “Victory
Garden” Heisler, Richard “Ad
Crazy” Marsh, James “Theta"’
Loughran, and Shirley “Tsk, Tsk”
Tetley are just a few who will see
that the $lOO given to that com
mittee is used to best advantage.