l aad 'll.v PENN STATE COLLEGIAN - Suieessor to 7'hc Free Laver, established 1867 Published semi-weekly during the College year. except on holiday.. by student.. of The Pennsylvania Stole College. in the interest of the College. the student, faculty, alumni. and friends. MCPNCIiCtITLY rpm National Advertising Service, Inc Colbw PublisA;r: Rep ,, ,, , Wive 420 MADISON MC. NEW YORK, N.Y. Cmc ..01) DOSION . SAN FirAniciscp LOB ANct.l.Es . PORTLAND • St.n.c CHARLES M. WHEELER, JR. '3B JOHN G. SAHELLA '33 Editor Business Manager JEROME WEINSTEIN '3B JAY H. DANIELS 'SS Managing Editor Advertising Manager FRANCIS 11. SSYSICZAK '3B ROIJERT S. McKELYEY '3B News Editor Circulation Manager WOODROW W. BIERLY '33 CARL W. vz 'SR Foature Editor Promotion Manager SIIIRI.F.Y R. HELMS '3B ROIIEItT E. ELLIOTT JR. 'SS Women's Editor Foreign Advertising Mantiger GEORGIA 11. POWERS' '39 KATHRYN M. JENNINGS '3B Associate Women's Editor Senior Secretary CAROLYN TYSON '39 Assorting Women's Editor ASSOCIATE EDITORS Thomau A. Deal '35 Herbert 11. Cohan %111 Enloe 11. Trabue WiMorn It. .lonclthn Jr. '39 Alan G. 91cInIYee Roy IL Niebuhr Jr. '39 Salvatore S. Sala '39 John A. Tronnorlteh '39 WOMEN'S ASSOCIATE EDITORS Lucllic S. Greenberg '39 Florence E. Long '39 Dell. S. Shoe. '39 Itolpb It. Guntlltteb '39 Richard W. }Coronas '39 Dallas R. Lone '39 Jannis.: Shaffer . 39 Francis A. EL Vosters Jr'. '39 Mary J. Sample '39 51 . ‘in4rintr Editor Thin 100 00 Nov: Editor Thio 1000 1936 Memlxr 1937 Associated Cotte&de Press Distributors of Collegiate Digest Tuesday. April 20, 1937 ABOUT TO BE A HAS-BEEN JUST before he becomes a has-been the outgoing ed j Roy traditionally becomes just slightly maudlin and sentimental and in his last column (70 lines of double- spaced copy, - Chuck,) reviews the accomplishments of the p a per during the past year; a sort of state-of-the- nation speech. "Hello, Has-Been," we realize But after the third, that what has or has not been done in the past sixty-five imues doesn't much matter now. Next year is the inn -piirant thing. That is especially true this spring. Penn Stale is going to be a much changed college four years from now and the direction of the change is going to be determined largely during the next twelve months. Because he is the only person in college who is in con stint contact with students, faculty, and administration, the 'student editor is in a position to know what sort of changes are likely to be made, and which ones will be desirable. His function is to serve as a sort of inter mediary, influencing administration figures to consider student needs and wishes, and pointing out to students the necessity or wisdom of certain administrative poli- Cies.' It is inevitable that the aims and the desires of these two groups sometimes clash. It is then that the editor must choose sides—on the basis of his own judg ment—and work for one or the other. With this in mind suppose we see what the important problems or the nest few years are going to be New buildings and new dorms will result in increased ernidiment. The percentage of co-eds is going to rise. Both men's and women's student government will have to function more dricientt,, , if they are to retain any real authority. The women this year have dealt with most of their problems by 'refusing to face them. As more women come here the amount of control that can be'exereised over them will diminish. W. S. G. A. in about two or three years should be willing to admit its inability to legislate. morality. • •• ••irhi least, recognize sihe problems which they f Ike . ; do something ab&nt..theM.f ctiO• nnii;itforrn programs 'designed-, to ;improve, stn. clifit4overnMent are a step in the right,direction: One oTrthe hmi'ortant functions of this paper• will be to see to itthat campaign promises are carried out. With a larger 444 body the present government system will prob ably need revision. It will have to be decentralized so ihat'it is more representative. Properly organized it can bring a lot of benefits to the students. If allowed to atrophy it will be replaced by administrative rule. Some drastic changes have been long needed in the medical service here. They will be made eventually if everything flows smoothly and august administrative bodies are allowed to move as slowly as they like. They will be made immediately if some student dies because of carelessness or inefficiency. One scarcely knows which to hope for. Something should be done to enlighten students en contemporary affairs. The amazing ignorance of most or them is almost unbelievable. More amazing is the fact that few of them' are. Unless an effort is made to prevent its coming, big time football may be back with us here in three or four years. With the lifting of the depression alumni arc again able to send boys here. The size of the stands are being enlarged, the field improved; we are schedul ing big teams that are big drawing attractions. In it self big time football is not too important, but its re sult can be devastating to the College. With it goes alumni control of athletic policy, scholastic standards, publicity department, and—most important for students —control of the student press. Not all these problems will arise at once. Some per haps will not come at all, though there will be others to take their place. But—for the next year, at least—we have confidence in the ability of the new staff to meet them squarely. The COLLEGIAN has behind it a liberal tradition; we are sure it will continue to live up to it. - UNLIKE THE SUPREME COURT, whose mem bers go on forever, this column changes hands at regularly stated intervals. This being one of them it devolves upon us to draw up our summa tion, our Swan Song, so called. Te've been thinking about this column for some time and have decided that we owe it to the College at large to present a sober analysis of The School as we saw it: • Minus Two: W. S. G. A.--because we suspect them of trying to filibuster the co-ed drinking question to death. The Penn State "Froth"--because they said "the slap-happy Collegian runs the Beaux Arts Ball add with the date December 9" and in the same issue dis played a two-page advt. for the Jr. Prom dated April 16. Ase Maitin—who soap boxes for the Republicans under the cloak of Liberalism. The Administration—for its slap-happy (it is a good word, jinn) athletic policy. The College Health Service—Q. E. D. R. 0. T. C.—because conscription is conscription is conscription. Fraternities--because dormitories should, not try to puss .themselves off as things which they ain't. , Freshman Customs—veitidual appendage of a dead past, the Collegiate Era, having no place in the mod ern educational mill. --Alan C. Mclntyre '39 --Herbert h. Cahnn '39 The Fraternity Political Cliques—because; they con tinually violate the letter and spirit of the election code. As for instance, passing out numerous I. F. Ball tickets to independent boys in return for votes. It doesn't take ninny of them to exceed $lO. Nothing, of course, will be done about it. .99 & 41-100ths per cent of l'enn State Students, Male and Female—because of your of apathy and smug complacency in the face of enochal interna tional readjustments and your • adamant refusal to recognize your own relation to a changing world. Zero: Dean Warnock—by his own admission. Dean Ray—who is just too, too, utterly utter Sam Wyand—because of his tendency to stew in his own juice. Harold Alrlerfer—who shows symptoms dangerous ly akin to those of the "tired liberal." The College Publicity Dept.—because it is now en gaged in a struggle for life by endeavoring to sign up the Dionne Quints for State in 1953. Mac Hall Food—not that we ever ate it, but we get it thrown up to us continually. The National Association of College Professors— bcc•:use Labor Unions should not ,try to pass them selves off as things, which they ain't. Straight Three: The Art Dept.—because its members combine more quaiities of guts, awareness, joviality.and forthright teaching ability than any other single dept. on the campus. The "Bell"—widely recognized for its excellence in the literary world beyond the mountains, it is virtu ally ignored bp a slap-happy (its a swell word) stu dent body. Eddie Nichols—when asked' to chairman Thurs day's Anti-War Strike, he said: "But I have already spoken twice before." His classic answer to the ex planation "but wars are still going on," was: "I guess that makes me look bad." Alfred G. Pundt—in whom the true German herit age cannot be extinguished by the mouthings of a hopelessly insane fanatic. Hal Reede. Van, Howard Rowland, Gal, et al—who prove that Profs can be human beings and swell gents. Frank Osterhind—that I'arest of the rare, a politi cian with a conscience, a' point of view; and a deter mination to take his job seriously. The Hofbrau—for combining the best qualities of good service, with a friendly staff, good beer, and Louie's homburgs. Russ Clarke—another swell gent out of a morass of self-stuffed shirts. The Artists' Course—for the National Symphony, The Plnyers—Cor "Bury the Dead." S. K. Stevens—who makes history live. And The Most Anonymous Co-ed in College. —TOWN OLD MANIA TAwl!I bl'Ark; (A)l,l;ikii.A/si Noted Physicist DR. EDWARD TELLER Teller To Spe4 Here Tomorrow Famous 'Professor Will Talk On 'Nuclear Physics and Its Application' Dr. Edward Teller. professor of theoretical physics at George Wash ington University and leading inves tigator in the field of atomic transmu tation, will speak on "Nuclear Phys ics and •Its Application." The address will be given in the physics lecture room tomorrow at 7:15 o'clock. The experiments of ancient alchem ists, who tried to transform baser metals into gold, are far excelled by the commonplace transmutation of mercury. into gold and other experi ments in this field performed by Doc tor Teller. In non-technical language, Doctor Teller will explain the recent deCel opment in the field of sub-atomic physics. His investigations indicate the birth of a new outlook upon at omic research. Doctor Teller's work has been with the inner structure of atoms, as contrasted with the former work which - involved only the exterior portion of atoms. Doctor Teller, recognized as one of the world's' leading theoretical physic ists, was born in Budapest and has done work in several European uni versities, including Munich, Leipzig, Gottingen, and . Copenhagen: He was Rockefeller Fellow at the Institute of Atomic Physics and lecturer. in phys ics at the University of .London. Co-Edits The women's fraternities have an nounced their officers for the new year. They are: Alpha Chi Omega: Edna Bruno, president; Mary Jane Sample, vice president; Lucille Hayes, secretary; and Marian Weaver. treasurer. Alpha Epsilon Phi: Lucille Green )berg, president; PaulaWohlfeld, vice president; Cecile Metz, secretary; and Joan Sperling, treasurer. Alpha Omicron. Pie Maybelle Pen • Icy, president; Louise Haines, vice president;, Olwen Evans, secretary; and Doris Sanders, treasurer. ' Chi Omega: Alice Allebach, presi dertt;yolly Lowe, vice-president; Jes kie :Spfuninkk, s9 c retary; and: Kat& tYnlquaningharh, trleaatti,eC. ,I ;' I' i ~ y. Delta; i Gamma :!!" Gertrude ; Crcinat4 pre4:ferjN; Linisefutton.o6443iaii!. dent; Bertha Percival, secretary; and Jean Lyman, treasurer... ' Gamma Phi Beta< Martha Barr, president; Jean Keller, vice-presi dent; Fern Warner, secretary; and Janet Lynch, treasurer. - Kappa Alpha Theta: Georgia Pow ers, president; Betty Smith, vice president; Jean Wolfe, secretary; and Eleanor Saunders; treasurer. Kappa Kappa Gamma: Mary Gra vatt, president; Dee Graham, secre tary; and Frances Keesler, treasurer. Phi Mu: Carolyn McConnell, presi dent; Peg Gilliland, vice-president; Nancy West, secretary; and Mary IT'S A TREAT - THE NEW WAY HAMBURGERS ALSO COLLEGE ICE CREAM COFFEE SHOP E. BEAVER AVENUE OPP. POST OFFICE ' Men's and Women's LION COATS NOW ON SALE MEN'S AVAILABLE AT Stark Bros. & Harper, Paul A. Mitten Women's at Schiow's BOTH ON SALE AT STUDENT UNION Price ,$1.25 ♦ FOOTLIGHT • TITS CAST Benny J. Lloyd Larkins Spike John 0. Chambers Craig Temple ____ Charles W. Tilden Brother Weisel __Rudie L. Ilellmud Hat Men Raymond Sloan Bill Marlin Paul Dean Peggy, Pat Lou. • Peggy Lytle, Pat Altwater, Louise Sringer Phyllis Townsend Lucille Giles Eghert Van Peer. J. Elliott Thompson Ivan Jack MeCain Rosebud Peggy Schaeffer Professor Baldwin John Steer Morgan Rockefeller (A Pershing Rifle) Cliff ton King Mr. Appleknocker Robert Ricks Dean Stewart Hermione Hunt Jane Kay Holden Helen Barbara Hayes Mnizie Simpson Ruth Fein With a heavy-handed humor that smacked more of burlesque than sa tire,• "Pardon My Glove" delighted a less than critical audience Saturday night as it dealt out impartial.brick bats to such widely separated institu tions as the R.0.T.C., Music ft. :mm pus, reds, and this newspaper. The plot dealt with two escaped convicts, Spike and Benny, who found the Penn State campus a perfect spot to exer cise their talents, but the story sel dom got in the way of the satire— which was just as well. Mistaken for football men sent by alumni, Spike and Benny, played by John Chambers and Lloyd ° Larkins, become the heroes of the College. (El igibility rules must have been changed as Chambers is a football star while still a freshman.) The story whirls through freshman week, class rooms, fraternities, house party, parades, Grange. dorm, and ends with Spike renouncing his throne as Carnival King "for the woman he loves," Mazie Simpion of South Philly. Benny, meanwhile, has made happy connec tions with the Dean of Worsen, played by Hermione Hunt, and the juveniles, Craig and Phyllis Chuck Tilden and Lucille Giles—are reunited so that the show ends in the best Thespian tradi tion with three couples in rapturous embrace. Larkins, in . the tradition of Bill Edwards irr the tradition of Eddie Malaita!, had the best lines of the show and if his style was less than subtle it was none the less effective. Giles did all that could be expected in a colorless role. Tilden had little but his voice. Hunt did one of the best jobs in the ShoW. Chambers was sat-' isfactory in another stodgy part. Cast' as Egbert, freshman stooge, Johnny Thompson. came very close - to stealing the show. His pantomime in the scenes where he was dressed as a girl was close to perfect. Jack Mc- Cain as Ivan (nee Swalmski) the Red did a good job also. The music, was the same sort that Dixon has been writing for the past several years. The Cole Porterish "Take Me for a Sleigh Ride" was our favorite and "Nothin' New" was bet ter than most 'amateur songs. The Rhumba danced by Bart Henderson and Ruth Fein was the outstanding specialty although the tap dancing was much better than in any recent show. Perhaps it was the Glee Cltib trip early in the Week or maybe it was the effect of I. P. Ball. At any rate the singing didn't seem to be as good as it is usually in a TheSpier' show: Neither Galin, Unangst, nor the Quartette did us well as they might. I The dancing choruses, on the other hand, were better trained and better looking than usual. The routines were well,planned and well executed. Sets .and . Cc.Stume S'eeniell a little garish at times. The brilliant light ing that was used for most of the numbers didn't help any. The shim moved rapidly and was free from any of the "dead" spots often found in Thespian productions. "Pardon My Glove" is the sort of show that can't stand a great deal ell analysis without going to pieces, but which is a lot of fun to see. Bechtel, treasurer. Theta Phi Alpha: Dorothy Vallish, president; Jean Gillis, vice-president; Mary Campi, secretary; and Violet Bailoni, treasurer. Blue Band Gives Last '37 Number Keys,' Medals Presented To 47 Members; Sit-down Strike Features Concert The Blue Band gave the final con- tert of the .season on Sunday in Schwab Auditorium,