I suppose you all saw the collection of weathers 'exhibited at
Chicago Vxposition ? The exhibitor is a fast friend of mine, and
always will be, for I made his fortune. He was going to travel
all over the world and collect specimens for his collection. Meet
ing him, I said : " Don't you do it ; come to State College ; "
then I told him what we could do in the way of variety and
amount. Well, he came and made his collection in a week, and
he confessed to me that he had got some styles of weather that he
had never seen before and as to quantity—why after he threw out
all the injured specimens he still had enough to sell, to spare and
to give to the heathen.
Centre County weather is away out of proportions in respect to
its home. Half the time when it is well packed, you can see the
weather sticking out over the edges into the other counties.
You see the genial baritone in our brass band—our estimable
Pennsylvania Dutch friend—hang out a white sheet over the
cupola, and you fix up for a drought; you leave your umbrella up
in your room, don your duck trousers, " sally out with a sprink
ling pot," and ten to one you get drowned. The next day
Johnny gets patriotic and flings the college colors to the breeze ;
you imagine an earthquake is due, you stand from under and
grab hold of something to steady yourself, and the first thing you
know you get sunstruck. These are great disappointments, but
they can't be helped.
I could write volumes about the brutal contrariness of P. S. C.
weather, but I will give you only one instance of it. I love to
hear the rain-drops patter on the shingles on a Saturday morning
when I am in bed, so I moved to the fifth floor with an eye to
that enjoyment. Do you suppose it ever rains on the part of the
roof over my bed ? No, you can gamble on it, it doesn't. It skits
it every time.
No language could do State College weather justice, so I have
endeavored to do it honor. But after all, there are at least one or
two things about that weather which we would not like to part
with. If we had not our beautiful holidays, we should still have
to credit the weather with one feature which compensates for all
its terrible vagaries—its kindness to us during Commencement
The Free Lance.
[APRIL )