off,
j. TODD IIUTCIIIXSO:, Publisher.
I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT THAN PRESIDENT. Heset Clay.
TrMi,.jS2.CO I'KIi Axxr.ii.
1 u " "ISLSO IX ADVANCE.
VOL. I.
DinBOTOItY.
VrniEO EXrKfcsaH run uil ALituiUMAX.
. .
"list or rovr oitices.
i l-tU frees.
I'ust Masters. Districts.
: J'oua's (.'reek,
Jtiid Station,
J'.irro!luwn,
I jt lieis Spring",
I Jijcasburg.
j J'jllea Timber,
s ;..Uiuiu,
f t.len C'oauell,
.iii-iiilook,
toreuo.
I'luoral Ioint,
piaster,
; ierihiUiT,
; J'LilliviHe,
: jLoj'jI.ni'l,
i f:. Augustine,
: L.-vcl,
f 03:11:111,
jinaierliill,
Joseph Viharn, Voder.
Joseph S Mardis, Blacklick.
Benjamin Wirtner, Carroll.
Dau!. Litzingcr, Chest.
John J. Troxeil, Washint'n.
Mrs. II. M'Cague, Ebcusburg.
Isaac Thompson, White.
J. M. Christy, Gallitzin.
Joseph Ci ill, Chest.
Win. M'Uough, Washt'n.
H. A. Boggs, Johnst'wn.
Wm. Gwinn, Loretto.
E. Wissinger, Conem'gh.
A. Durbin, Munster.
Francis Clement, Conem'gh.
Andrew J. Fcrra! Susrphan.
G. W. liowrnan, White.
Joseph Mover, Clearfield.
George Conrad, Richland.
15. M'Colgan, Washt'n.
Vt'm. Murray, Croyle.
Miss M. Gillespie Washt'n. i
Andrew Beck, S'mmerh 11.
CHURCHES, MINISTERS, &C.
I'rrtbiterian Rev. D. IIaubiso.v, Pastor.-
rroa.iiiu everv Sabbath morning at
10
loilock. aud in the evening at I o clock, bab
x:a .School at 1 o'clock, P. M. Prayer uieet
l?.: every Thursday evening at C o'clock.
! tit 'li"t L'jiucopal C'turch Rev. J. Shane,
'Jrcich-r in charge. Rev J. M. Smith, As
i -:mt. Preaching every Sabbath, alternately
t; I; o'clock in the morning, or 7 in the
Sabbath School at y o'clock, A. M.
t'.v.ir .-ueeting everv Thursday evening at 7
J Independent Rr.v. Ll. R. Powell,
:. Preaching every Sabbath morning at
;j uclo.k, and in the evening at G o'clock.
jS ;.''nili School at 1 o'clock, P. M. Prayer
f.-:ia on the lirst Monday evening of each
i:..i:h ; and on every Tuesday, Thursday
Friday eveuing, excepting the first week
'hi each i.i j:ith.
J Cdvi-iitfie Methodist P.ev. John Williams,
jr.-t :. Preaching every Sabbath evening at
p aui C u'clock. Sabbath School at 10 o'clock,
ll. M. Praver meeting everv Friday evening
Society every Tuesday evening
,'i ...-mRev.Wm. Lloyd, Pastor Prcuch-
..... t. . . i. ii .
O C.'JCiv.
- very au:u!i uiuiuiu j iiui r.
'1 iV.v'u.'.rr li'iptista Rev. David Jenkins,
p'-uor Preaching every Sabbath evening at
i o'clock. Sabbath School at I o'clock, P. M.
j (Viif-lIiiv. M. J. Mitchell, Pastor
r -rv 1-.-r '. ery Sabbath morning at 10 J o'clock
i VeMers at i o'clock iu the evening.
EHE'SS5LRi MAILS.
MAILS ARRIVE.
T.-X. t-i. d.i.'v, at 12 J o'clock, A. M.
f.'..;.-:.i. ' nt 12 " A. M.
MAILS CLOSE!
Fi-t.-rn. daily, at" iS o'clock, A. M.
,x..ra, - at 0J a. -u.
tir The Mails from Rutler.In.liana.Strongs
arrive on Tuesday nd Friday of
i wti-k. at 5 o'clock. P. M.
Lc.vp K'-ieiisburg on Mondays and Thurs-
nt 7 o'clock, A. M.
:The Mails from Newman's Mills, Car
' &e., arrive on Monday and Friday of
w t t k, at 3 o'clock. P. M.
Li-.ive K'.,-ni'..iirg on Tuesdays and Satur
'i. at T o'clock, A. M.
t3 Post (VXice opon on Sundays from 0
' i j o'clock, A. M.
KAILRO 1S KCIICDl'LC.
WIEMORE STATION.
F-U Express Train, leaves at
9.45 A. M.
8.48 P. M.
8.24 P. M.
10.00 A. M.
0.30 A. M.
Mali Train, "
"t Express Train, "
' Mail Train, "
' Fast Line, "
t'Ol'XTY OFFICERS.
ic of thf Courts. President, Hon. Geo.
i lor, Iluiitingdon ; Associates, CeorgeW.
''y. ilichard Jones, Jr.
' "Ahnotfiry. Joseph M Donald.
CVr.t to I'rothonotar;. Robert A. M'Coy.
A'ju'.r and Recorder. Michael Hassor..
b'luty JUjitter end Recorder. John Scan-
a.
ZhcriJ. Robert P. Linton.
b'puty Sheriff. George C. K. Zahm.
Jjj'nct Attorney. Philip S. Noon.
I)avi.l T tnrm
C'rk to Commissioners. George C. K. Zahm.
Voumel to Commissioners. John S. Rhey.
T'"i!urrr Inlm Hl.iir.
I r,J"r llmst Director. William Talmcr,
f iv'J U llarro. Michael M'Guire.
oust Treasurer. George C. K.. Sab in.
"r JIuse Steward. James J. Kaylor.
Mmtlntile Annrnir TlinnidS M'ConROll.
t , Auditors. Kuza J. Lloyd, Daniel Cobaugh,
County Surveyor. Henry Scanlan.
L"r"ner. Peter Doughe'rty.
v r "'nrfmuit common &ciiuvi3.u. .
h tonaick.
I
fREXSRL'RG I20R. OFFICERS.
""if of the Peace. David II. Roberts.
-rnson Kinkcad.
":tT9's Andrew Lewis.
y'"i Council. William Kittell, William K.
,I"r, Charles Owens. J. C. Noon, Edward
Qo-maker.
Cfrrk to Council. T. D. Litzinger.
"youjh Treasurer. George Gurley.
Arto-. Edward Glass, William
' licese S. Lloyd, John J. Lloyd, Morris
vais, Thomas J. Davis.
Jr'urer oj School Hoard Evan Morgan.
-wt.George Gurley.
Collector. George Gurley.
j "nun. KMC liVUDS.
Vt, .-John S. Kh JMm J
J O" T. t.-
Poetry.
BY MRS. II. E. G. AKEY.
Take me from this clash and tumult,
Bur3t the town-bonds, give me air;
Oh! I do not like the world-look
That these stony faces wear,
Time-worn faces,
Love-lost faces
Joyless, world-worn, stony faces;
Oh! I do cot like the world-look
That these stony faces wear.
Dear me back, alone with nature,
Where dreamy sunshine lies,
Like God's love on every feature
Of the landscape or the skies;
Where the loving winds have revelled,
And the thought-elves talked and toiled,
Though it leave my locks dishevelled,
And my garments sore assoiled.
Oh! I hate this clang and bustle,
Where life's heart-ache throbs and heaves:
Hate your silvery, silken rustle,
Robes that scorn the forest leaves:
And these stiff, impassive faces,
Never sunlike, always old,
Where there lie no love-born traces
Oi the heart's forgotton gold.
Take ine from this toil and bustle;
From this gush of silken sheen;
Whc-re the green leaves smile and rustle,
And the thought-elves lurk between;
Dreamy sj'i rits.
Flashing spirits,
Hear yc what their whispers mean?
Oh; I love the leues' sweet rustle,
Where tLe thought-elves lurk between
Kistorical.
Reminiscence of WasSiIugrlou.
The revolution was over. Eight years'
conflict hail ceased, aud now the warriors
were to separate lor ever, turning their
weapons into ploughshares, and lht:r camp
into workshupa. The spectacle, though a
sublime and glorious one, was yet attended
with sorrowful I'eeiiugs ; for, siias ! in the
remnants of that gallant army of patriotic
soldiers uow about to disband without pay,
without support, stalked poverty and dis
ease. The country had not the means to
be gratotul.
The details of the condition of many ol
the officers aud soldiers of that period, ac
cording to history and oral tradition, were
melancholy in the extreme. Possessing
no mcaus of patrimonial inheritance to fall
back upon thrown out of even the peril
ous support of the soldier at the commence
ment of winter, aud hardly lit for any othei
duty than that of the camp their situation
can better be imagined than described.
A single instance, as a sample of the
situation of many of the oiiiccrs, as rebated
of the conduct oi iiaron Steuben, may not
be amiss. When the main body of the
army was uisbauded at Ncwburg, snd the
veteran soldiers were bidding a purling
farewell to each other, Lieut. Col. Coch
ran, an aged soldier at the New Hampshire
line, remarked, with tears in his eyes, as
he shook hands with the baron :
"Fur myself I could stand it; but my
wife and daughters are in the garrison of
that wretched tavern, and 1 have no means
of removing them."
"Come, come," said the baron, "don't
give way thus. I will pay my respects to
Mrs. Cochran and her daughters."
When the good old soldier left them,
their countenances were warm with grat
itude for he left there all he had.
In one of the llhode Island regiments
were several companies of black tro)ps,
who had served through the whole war,
aud their bravery aud discipline were un
surpassed. The baron observed one of
these poor negroes on the wharf at New
burg, apparently in great distress.
"What is the matter, brother soldier?"
"Why, Master Daron, I want a dollar to
get home with, now the Congress has no
farther use for me."
The Baron was absent for a few moments,
and then returned with a silver dollar that
he had borrowed.
"There, it's all I could get. Take it."
The negro received it with joy, hailed a
sloop which was passing down the river to
Xcw York, and as he reached the deck,
took off his hat and said
"God bless )0U, Master Baron?"
These are on ly single illustrations of the
army at the close of the war. Indeed,
Washington had this view at the close of
his farewell address to the army at ltocky
Hill, in November, 1703.
"And being now aboutto conclude these
his last public orders, to take his ultimate
leavo in a short time of the military char
acter, and to bid a final adieu to the armies
he has so long had the honor to command,
he can only again offer, in their behalf,
his recommendations to their country, and
hi prayer to the God of rmio.
EBENSBURG, PA., THURSDAY, MARCH
"May ample justice be done them here
and may the choicest of heaven's favors,
both heie aud hereafter, attend those who,
under Divine auspices, have secured innu
merable blessings for others.
"With these wishes aud this benediction,
the Commander-in-Chief is about to retire
from service. The curtain of separation
will soon be drawn, aud the military scenes
to him will be closed forever."
The closing of the "military scenes" I
am about to relate:
New York had been occupied by Wash
ington on the !i5th of November. A few
daya afterwards he notified the President
of Congress, which body was then in session
at Annapolis, in Maryland, that as the war
was uoh' closed, he should consider it his
duty to proceed thence and surrender to
that body the commission which he had re
ceived from them seven years before.
The morning of the hlth of December,
17bo, was a sad and heavy one to the rem
nant ot the American army in the city of
New lork. ihe noou ot that uay was to
witness the farewell of Washington; he
was to bid adieu to his military comrades
forever. '1 he efneers who had been with
him in solemn council, the privates who
had fought aud bled in the "heavy light,"
under his orders, were to hear his commands
no longer. Ihe manly form and dignified
countenance of the "great captain" was
hence'orth to live in their memories.
As the hour of noon approached, the
whole garrison, at the request of Washing
ton himself, was put in motion, and march
ed down Broad street to l'rancis' tavern,
his head-UjUartcrs lie wished to take
leave of private soldiers alike with officers,
and bid thtm all adieu. His favorite light
infantry were drawn up in line, facing in
wards, tnrougu Pearl street, pt tne toot
of Whitehall, where a barge was iu readi
ness to convey him to Powell's Hook.
Within the dining-room of the tavern
were gathered the generals and field-officers
to take their farewell.
Assembled there were Knox, Greene,
Steuben, Gates and others, who had served
with him faithfully iu the "tented field;"
but alas! where were others that had en
tered the war with him seven years bclbro?
Their bones ciumMed in the soil from Can
ada to Georgia. Montgomery had yielded
up his life at Quebec, Wooster fell at 1 'an
bury, Woodhull was barbarously murdered
while a prisoner at the battle on Long
Island, and Mercer fell mortally wounded
at Princeton ; the brave and chivalric Lau
rens, after displaying tha most heroic cour
age in the trenches of Yorktown, died iu
a trilling skirmish in South Carolina; the
brave but eccentric Lee was no longer
living, and Putnam, like a helpless child,
was stretched upon the bed of sickness.
Indeed, the battle-field and time had
thinned the ranks which entered with him
on the cjuSict of independence.
Washington entered the room the Lour
of separation had come. As he raised
his eve and glanced on the faces-of those
assembled, a tear cou:.-od down his check,
and his voice Wi:s tremulous as he saluted
them.
was he alone.
Ibeit,
unused to the melting mood," stood around
him, whose hands, uplifted to cover their
brows, told that the tears which they iu
vain attempted to conceal, bespoke the
anguish they could not hide.
After a moment's conversation, Wash
ington culled for a glass of wine. It was
brought to him. T urning to the officers,
he thus addressed them :
"With a heart full of love and grati
tude, I uow take my final leave of you, au l
I most devoutly wish your latter days may
be as prosperous and happy as jour for
mer ones have been glorious aud honora
ble." He then raised the glass to his
lips, and added, "I cannot come to each of
you to take my leave, bnt shall be obliged
to you if each of you will take me. by the
hand."
General Knox, who stood nearest, burst
into tears, and advanced, incapable of ut
terance. Washington grasp him by the
baud, and embraced him. The officers
came up successively, and took an affec
tionate leave. No words were spoken, but
all was the "silent eloquence of tears."
What were mere words at such a scene ?
Nothing. It was the feeling of the heart
thrilling, though unspoken.
Washington grasped his hand, iu con
vulsive emotion, in both of his. All dis
cipline was now at an end. The officers
could not restrain the men as they rushed
forward to take Washington by the hand
aud the violent sobs and tears of the sol
diers told how deeply engraved upon
their affections was the love of their com
mander. When the last officer had embraced
him, Washington left the room, followed
by his comrades, and passed through the
line of right infantry. IIi3 steps were
slow and measured, his head uncovered,
and tears flowing thick and fast, as he
looked from side to side at the veterans
to whom he now bsde adiu forover.
Shortly au event occurred more touching
than all the rest. A giian t..
who had stood by his si'lo i-t Trenton
stepped iorth from the ranks aud extend
ed his hand.
"Pare well, niv beloved General, fare
well!" At length Washington reached the barge
at Whitehall, and entered it. At the fir.st
stroke of the oars he rose, and turning to
the companions of his glory, by waving
his hat, bade them a silent adieu Their
answer was only in tears; and the officers
and mew, with glistening eyes, watched
the receding boat till the form of their
noble commaudcr was lost sight of in the
distance.
Poyvku of Heading. Bcnjaman Frank
lin tells us, in one of his letters, that when
he was a boy, he read Essays to do Good,
by Cotton Mather. It was tattered and
torn, and several leaves were missing.
"But the remainder," he says, "gave me
such a turn of thinking, as to have an in
fluence on my conduct through life; for I
have always set a greater value on the
character of a doer of good than any
other kind of reputation, aud if I have
been a useful citizen thepublic owes the ad
vantage of it to the little book." Jeremy
Benthaiu mentions, that the current of Ins
thoughts and studies was directed for life
by a single phn.se that caught his cya at
the end of a pamphlet, The great e.-t
good to the greatest number." There are
single sentences iu the New Testament
that have awakeued to spiritual lile hun
dreds of millions of dormant souls. In
thiii'-s o less moment reading has won
droits power. George Law, a boy on his
father's farm, met an old and unknown
book, which told the story of a farmer's
son, who went away to seek his fortune,
and came home after many years' absence,
a rieli man, and ga' e great sums to all his
relations. From that moment George was
uneasy, till he set out on the travels to im
itate his adventures. He lived over again
the life he had read of, and actually did
return a millionare, aud paid all his fath
er's debts, llobinsoii Crusoe has sent to
sea mote sailors than the press rang.
The story about Geo. Washington telling
the truth about the cherry tree, has made
many a truth-teller. We owe all the Wa
veriy Novels to Scott's early readings of
the old traditions and legends and the
whole body of pastoral fiction came from
Addison's sketches of Sir Kod-vr Pe
Coveriy, in the Spectator. But illustra
tions are numbc-rle.-s. Tremble ye who
write, and ye who publish writings !
A pamphlet lias precipitated a revolution.
A paragraph may quench or kindle th."1
celestial spark in a human soul iu myr
iads of souls.
IIomk. It is a little word ; it has its
own interests, its own laws, its own cliSi
cuhies and sorrows', its own blessings and
joys. It is the sanctuary of the heart,
where the afiections are cheriched in the
tenderest relations, where the heart is
joined to heart, and love triumphs over
all sellL-h calculations. It is the training
school of the tender plants, which in after
years are to yield flowers and fruit, to pa
ternal care. It is the stream which beau
tify and enliven social life.
If any man should have a home, it is
the man of business. He is the true work
ing man of the community. The mechan
ic has his fixed hours, and when these
have run their course, he may, ere the
day closes, dismiss all anxieties as his la
bors end, and seek the home circle. C.mi
paratavely little has been the tax on his
mind, and not much more on his physical
system, as he learns to make all easy.
Bxit the man of business is under a con
stant pressure. His is not a ten-hour sys
tem, with an interval of rest ; but he is
driven onward and onward early and late,
without the calculatiou of hours. He
must be employed. In the earnestness of
competition in the complexity of mod
ern modes of business iu the fluctuations
which frequently occur in the solicitous
dependence on the fidelity and integrity
of others he has no leisure moments du
ring the day. Witlra mind incessantly
under exciting engagement, and a body
without its appropriate nutriment, he may
well pant for home, and hail the moment
when he may escape from his toils to seek
its quiet, aud its affection and confidence.
I'trris.
Settling the Question. "Father,"
said a young lisper, "when was the flood ?"
"O, my soit, that happened long ago."
"Wath we alive then C" persisted the
inquirer.
"No, dear; the flood we read about in
the Bible happened many thousand vears
asro."
""Well, r.ow, thatith too bad ! I thought
Tom Brown wath fibbiu'. lie thaid to
me thith morning that he wath there
then and waded thronuh."
22, 18(H).
SSreiid MiiMiis lu .Spain.
Finding ni3"self about two leagues from
Seville, iu the picturesque village of Al
cade de Guadaira, but commonly called
Alcala de los Panadcros or bakers as
almost all the bread cousumed in Seville
is made there, 1 determined to learn how
it was made. No traveler who ever visits
the south of Spain ever fails to remark,
"How delicious the bread is !" It is white
as snow, close as cake, and yet very-light;
the flavor is delicious, fur the wheat is
good and pure, and the bread well knead
ed.
A practical demonstration is better then
heresay or theory. I would not content
myself with the description of the process
of bread making, but went to the house
of a baker, whose pretty wife aud daught
er I had often stopped to look at, as they
were sorting the wheat, saated on very
low stools in the porch of theii house.
it was a pretty picture ; their dark spark
ling eyes, ro.-y cheeks, and snowy teeth ;
their hair always beautifully dressed, and
always ornamented with natural flowers
from their little garden in the back ground;
their bright colored neckerchiefs rolled iu
at the top, showing the neck ; their cotton
gowns with short sleeves; their hands
scrupulously clean, and so small thatmany
an aristocratic dme might have envied
them; surrounded by panniers tilled with
wheat, which they took out a handful at a
time, sorting it most expeditiously, and
throwing every defective grain in aucthcr
basket. Wheu this is done the wheat is
ground between two large circular stones,
in the way it was ground in Egypt two
thousand years ago, the rotary motion be
ing given b' a bhnfolded mule, which pa
ces round and round with untiring patience,
a bell being attached to his neck, which,
as long as he is moving, tinkles on ; and
when he steps he is urged to his duty by
the shouts of "fw ?nttii," from someone
within hearing. W hen ground the v. heat
is sifted through three sieves, the last being
so fine that only the pure flour can pass
through ; it is of a pr.le apricot color.
The bread is made of an evening; and
after sunset i returned to the baker's ar:d
watched his pretty wife first weigh the
flour and then mix it with only just
suffiient water, mixed with a little salt,
to make it into dough. A very small
quantity of leaven is added. The scrip
ture sjys, "a little leaven loavcneth the
whole lump ;" but iu England, to avoid
the trouble of kneading, they put as much
leaven, or yeast, in one batch of house
hold bread, as in Spain would la-t them
a week for the six or ciirht donkey-loads
of biead they send every night from their
oven. When the dough was made it was
put in sacks, and carried on the donkeys'
Lack to the ovens in the centre of tliO vil
lage, so as to bake it immediately after it
is kneaded. On arriving the dough was
divided into portions weighing three
pounds each. T wo long narrow wooden
tables on ties.-els were then placed down
the room, and, to my surprise, about twen
ty men came in and ranged themselves on
one side of the tables. A lump of
dough was handed to the nearest, which
he commenced kneading and knocking
about, and then passed it to his neighbor,
who did the same, aud so on successively
till all had kneaded it, when it was as
soft as new putty, and ready for the oven.
f Of course as soou as the first baker hands
the loaf to his neighbor, another is given
to hii.i,andsoon till the quantity of dough
is kneaded by them ail. The Baker's
wife and daughter shaped them for the
oven. Some of the loaves are divided into
smaller ones, and immediately baked.
The ovens are very large, and not heat
ed by fire under them ; but a quantity of
twigs cf the herbs of the sweet majorain
and thyme, which cover the hills in great
profusion, are put iu the oven and ignited.
They heat the oven to au extent required;
and as the bread gets baked, the oven gets
gradually colder, so the bread is never
burned.
They knead the bread in Spain with
such force that the palm of the hand aud
the second joints of the baker's fingers
are covered with corns ; and so affects the
chest that they cannot work for more than
two hours at a time. They can be heard
from some distance as they give a kind of
guttural sound ha, ha as they work,
which they say eases the chest. Our sail
ors have the same fancy when hoisting a
sail.
I have kept a small loaf of Spanish
b:cad for several mouths in a dry place,
and then immersed it iu boiling water and
rebaked it, and 1 can assure my readers
that it was neither musty nor sour.
A mau's wife died lately in New
York, and upon exhumation of the body,
not a trace of poison was found in it. This
is regarded as a remarkable proof of the
advancement of virtuo and dome? tie hap
piness in that oity.
NO. 31.
Wit and UlHtlom.
E3l A fool's maxim Absurdity is the
spice oi life.
Sj There is no lock in the world that
requires such careful picking as wed-lock.
ji,It is an old saying, but a very
pretty one, that a bluh is like a pretty
girl, for it becomes a woman.
tf9. It is a great deal better to say less
than half what you think, than to think
only half what you say.
ETiIn marriage, as in war, the terms
of capitulation are often violated by the
conqueror.
XQ In the throat of a man choked to
death while eating sausages, was found a
large piece of brass marked "Fido."
"Sarah," said a wag, "it's all over
town!" "What's all over town?" was
the anxious inquiry. "Mud." Sarah's
eyes dropped.
E?!X-lf you would enjoy your cigar, and
at the same time the society of the ladies,
you should invite none but widows, for
they will bring their own weeds.
XTSu-s winds the ivy around the tree,
as to the crag the moss-patch roots, so
c.ings my constant soul to thee ! my
own, my beautiful ivy Loots!
&2T One day last fall, a farmer in Il
linois cradled three acres of wheat, and
that night his wife, not to be outdone by
him, cradled three babies.
ECU man, describing a prairie village
; fter a hurricane had passed over it, said
that next morning he "saw twenty houses
full of people with their gable ends blown
out."
2r Let young people remember that
their good temper will gain them moro
esteem and happiness than the genius and
talents of all the bad men that ever ex
isted. JgiSf" Mrs. Partington says nothing de
ppiscs her so much as to see people who
profess to expect salivation, go to church
without their purses when a recollection
is to be tr.kcu up.
Bc2t- A man named Oats, was held up
recently for beating his wife and children.
On being sentenced to imprisonment, the
brute remarked that it was very hard a man
was not allowed to thrash his own oats.
INcxt to the wonder how the milk
got into the cocoa-nut, came George the
Third's marvel how the apple got into the
dumpling. This has been succeeded by
the question why white ashes should en:e
from coal, when coals are so deuced black ?
C?2 "Pad, let's go down to the alley
and have a game at ten pins."
"Ton pins ! What do you know about
rolling?"
"Me ! why I can jlst roll your darned
old eyes out in five miuutes."
ZtZf Theodore Hook was walking, in
the days of Warren's blacking, where one
of the emissaries of that shining charac
ter had written on the wall, "Try War
ren's B ," but had been frightened
from his propriety and fled. "The rest
is Tacking," said the wit.
The other night, a landlord dis
covering one of his customers drunk, and
slushing about in the mire, went to his
assistance, and setting him upon his feet,
inquired if he was sick, or what the mat
ter was. "No," replied the boozy cus
tomer, "I ain't drunk but I'm almighty,
discouraged !"
ES- doctor ordered one of his pa
tients to drink flower of sulphur water ;
the patient expressed his disirust by sig
nificant grimaces. "It is only the first
lass that is hard to drink," said the doc-
tor
"Thcn," rejoined the invalid, "I'
will begin with the second."
Millions of wild pigeons passed over
Cincinnati on Sunday. A great fuss ia
made in this State when a single bill passes
over the head of the Governor, and wo
wonder what Cincinnati must have tho't
wheu so many bills passed over her head
in a single day.
JkaTA wag called alend in the pit of
Drury lane Theatre "Mr Smith, your
house is on fire," whereupon a hundred
and twenty-five Smiths arose; when h
continued,"lt is Mr. John Smith's house,"
then sat down, leaving a preponderance of
a hundred and fifteen Johns in a i.ct
amount of one hundred and tweuty-fivo
Smiths.
BS!u A legal gcntlemanof thiscity,who
is unfortunately afflicted with an impedi
ment in his speech, a few days since had
his attention attracted by the stock in
trade ef a bird-dealer doing businea on
the side-walk in Nxssau-strcet.
"Bo-do-do-do-cs tha-that that p-p-p-par-rot
talk ?"
"Talk," was the indignant rejoinder ;
"if he couldn't talk bettor than you, I'd
wring his neck for him."
The lawyer .id not top to trud.
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